DM Kills Character When They Are Away | RPG Horror Stories

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

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[@Michael_H_Crabtree]

It reminds me of when a new author is brought in on an established series and kills a beloved character created by another author. Sometimes it just feels like they’re trying to establish that they’re in control now. It always feels disrespectful to the other author and readers. It usually feels cheap, too.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

That is a good way to put it. If you have a DM that retcons player backstories like this guy did, it does feel like a power play to feel completely in control. Almost like they didn't like the player so they just destroyed their character's purpose in the game.

[@lovelysakurapetalsyt]

This is exactly why whenever I make fanfics, I always try to keep the same general canon but just edited slightly, usually no deaths or resurrection unless it's essential to my ideas, in which case I preface even in my own writing that this is not being disrespectful, just trying to get ideas out

[@JamesTDG]

Always does. The moment they killed Han, I knew Star Wars was not gonna work out well

[@mr.exposition]

​@@JamesTDG yeah because star wars wasnt already ruined by the creator himself, no siree that never happened ever

[@Archon3960]

Yeah. It feels really crappy. B/ I once saw a "variation" of this used in a novel for comedic effect. The author spends time introducing a new character, explaining who they are in detail, so you'd think they're going to be a big deal, only to have them unceremoniously killed by the main characters who go like: - "Who was that guy." - "Heh. Who cares?"

[@dicksoncider5099]

Had a character die while I was away. Thing is the dm did it very flavorful and true to the character, it still felt horrible and I let him know. Even though it somewhat made sense it’s just not something one should do

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Yeah no matter how poetic or cool, without it being communicated it’s going to feel bad because of what was taken away!

[@PieCakeandDonuts]

Your DM sounds pretty cool I've only ever played d&d once so idk not sure I can relate but this sounds like the optimal situation and resolution of this situation

[@zorgonvoir6896]

In all honesty, i'm fully happy things went the way they went with everyone blocking him and not letting him explain his situation. He'd just end up more hurt with the DM manipulating the other players more into bullying him or just back in the toxic friend group of theirs which would definietly suck. He might not be aware but he dodged a huge bullet sleeping on all of that stuff. Even if he slept on the issue of losing his character and such, he did the right thing seeing how the dm acted how they acted, he'd just end up kicked out anyway. About the overall group i have one thing to say, the DM behaved like a complete unlogical spoiled child that was denied ice cream and the entire group acted like the unaware parents from all around blaming the mother for making it cry. W writer, L party and even worse DM.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Yeah, I feel like sometimes people try really hard to salvage bad situations. When it comes to dealing with people that you have a connection with outside of the game, it makes sense because you want to keep the peace in and outside of the game, but for an online roll20/discord game it is way different. If you only got to know these people to play a TTRPG, then when it doesn't pan out you cut ties with whoever is being difficult. After communication breaks down like this, the faster you move on means the faster you can be in another game and hopefully it will be a healthier dynamic!

[@zorgonvoir6896]

@@lootgoblinmarketplace Couldn't say it better myself.

[@twistedpinttavern]

You mentioned the DM taking away agency, and that's bad and definitely happened, but going even a step further and killing a PC while they're not even at the table is ridiculous. Running a cardboard cutout of the PC when they can't make it to a session is necessary sometimes, but you should NEVER kill off a PC while they're gone. I know things can get bad fast in combat, but if it looks like things are going south and you can't "plot your way out", pause the session and resume when everyone can make it. Or at the VERY least give the player a way back that doesn't absolutely wreck their entire character and backstory.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Yeah, the killing the character when the player isn’t playing that week was pretty bad, but it went so much worse when all the party got to come back but his character got to die a second time and now his whole life was a lie. This is maybe one of the worst ways you could punish a player. If the DM wanted to say that during the week only 2 of 5 could make it they all died but there was a much more interesting plot hook (like an escape a jail cell scenario but with a deity twist). Then it could almost be a fun moment. I think if the trickster god basically kept making them complete wacky puzzles for a mass resurrection it could be treated as a one shot? This DM was being malicious though which really sucks.

[@Beanz-on-Toast]

Right? A few at my table often have unstable work commitments and our DM let's us "control their characters" so the adventure can still continue organically (without the DM controlling the absent player) but we're to keep track of their HP and if they EVER get into single digits no attacks hit them. Does it make sense lore wise? No but it does allow us to have a "full team" while making sure our friend still has their character next time.

[@twistedpinttavern]

@@lootgoblinmarketplace Yeah, it could have ended up being a fun side quest to resolve an unfortunate situation. It just seems like everything was set from the start tbh

[@twistedpinttavern]

@@Beanz-on-Toast That's a good way to handle it. A bit immersion breaking, but better overall for the group

[@theuncalledfor]

Simple trick: As a DM, if a player character absolutely HAS TO be played while the player is away, manipulate circumstances to keep them out of real danger. A room is trapped? Absentee goes in last. Combat? Enemies mistake absentee for dead when they drop to 0HP and fall unconscious. Skip death saves, absentee is stable immediately. There is NEVER an excuse for a dead player character when the player is away.

[@Mordakai]

I honestly feel like killing off the PC for a player whilst that player is away without clearing it with that player is perhaps one of the most disrespectful things a group or a DM can do to a player. I am glad that the OP was able to get away from that group, even though it wasn't necessarily the best escape.

[@ZedRen-s8g]

I think fully invalidating the PC's backstory is just as bad. This would make me drop a game in a heart beat, especially if such a retcon adds nothing in the grand scheme of the narrative. It's better to add details, and bring clarity to the murky areas of a backstory, and discuss it with said player.

[@KestralKuthule]

My three pet hates with D&D lately. 1. Removing player autonomy. 2. Unspecified rules that you're just supposed to know when the DM doesn't tell you. 3. 'Attacking' the players with things related to real world problems. Like taking offence if an Autistic player doesn't get social cues. Well this DM hit all 3.

[@RedYDG]

Unless there was a total party wipe and the character was subject to 'fate of the party' the correct answer to being told you died while not being played is "nuh-uh".

[@Maninawig]

I could be reading into it a bit too much, I think the DM might have seen themselves as the trickster god, an author with full power to mess with people's minds and ship whomever they wanted. The first issue I saw was that gift lore... I have seen and been in sessions where such a lore based faux-pas was committed, and the DM fixed it by stating something like "as you are about to deny their kindness, you remember a rumor you heard that mentionned how denying gifts was just about the biggest insult you could make." It's never cool to just punish a player for not knowing something, or going on a fit cause your puppets didn't dance like you(the DM) wanted them to.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

That’s a good way to handle the gift lore, another way would be to have a servant of the princess (maybe the cart driver or a guard) lean in and whisper that “it would be rude to say no” or something to that effect. The princess would likely have some staff she trusts around in addition to the adventurers and they could act as friendly sources of any lore the DM wants to unload

[@Maninawig]

@@lootgoblinmarketplace Percisely. And a lot less railroady than what the DM did in this story.

[@josephperez2004]

Regarding online play, it's really important to be sure everyone is roughly on the same page on a number of things. This is why I tend to do online play only with my personal friend group or in Organized Play, so in the former case we've known each others for years and in the latter there is a pre-made set of rules that everyone (the GM included) is expected to abide by.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

I agree! Session Zeros and regular communication is good for all groups, but for online play this is so much more important as you don’t have the pre-established relationships and trust you may of had from being friends beforehand!

[@Prich319]

Bad DM, Bad party too, also petty, considering they wouldn't even tell the OP why he was killed off.

[@dragonmasterknight7]

I think the whole episode of this is the DM was just garbage. They seem to have just expected OP was angry over OP not noticing the subtle cues they were dropping in game. Cue's that, mind you, the DM did not discuss with them.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Yeah, there is a pretty good rule of thumb that if you want players to discover something you have to have at least 3 subtle mentions of it. If you are going to be cryptic you got to give people more than one shot at learning it. And I personally believe if they are being attentive and actively researching something than you have to be blatant with the clue.

[@dragonmasterknight7]

​@@lootgoblinmarketplaceit all sounds like nobble had feels for op and lashed out when nothing got through.

[@jrepra]

Meh, even if it was a salvageable situation, judging from their response to how they treated OP, it was best to let them burn that bridge. Infringing on basic player etiquette by usurping control of a character on a literal whim is not excusable, especially when it leads to death of said character. Not much the dm can do after that fact can fix or apologize for that totally avoidable and unfair situation. And intentionally trying to wiggle out of responsibility when approached, no matter by who, is just intentionally toxic.

[@tobiasbayer4866]

This reminds me of my own horror story involving a bad dm and removing autonomy. Basically I was playing a hexblade warlock with the gimmick that his patron was a really powerful cursed sword that would give him his powers and even talk to him. I was really proud of the character, wrote an extended backstory and even prepared two seperate personalities, one for him and one for the sword. In literally the second combat encounter of the campaign (the first was basically a tutorial and highly railroaded) the dm had an enemy cast "remove curse" on the sword and the dm ruled that it was a normal sword now. When I complained about it, because literally my entire class and character was ruined, he wouldnt budge and ruled I was now a fighter instead of a warlock. Like, imagine if you made a wizard character and in the first real combat of the game the dm makes you become feeble minded and when you complain he tells you to just make your character into a barbarian instead... Apparently what had happened is that the DM didnt read any of the backstories, skimmed over the character sheets, saw that I had given myself a magic sword, decided that was unfair and instead of asking me about it he just decided to make it useless. I only found out about this weeks later when the group broke up for unrelated reasons and I asked him about it. I didnt previously because I was to afraid to challenge the dm.

[@DiscipleCain]

DMs like Nobble are why I don't often let people DM if I can't walk to their house.

[@jackferguson7618]

Personally, I never engage in online TTRPG's. But this feels more like it was the party at fault for completely disregarding the character's efforts to make himself unique in the world. Then in an attempt to understand his "fault", he was kicked out of the party. Personally as a DM, I like to be more accommodating towards new players and I've taken to doing one shots with them to integrate their characters into the story/finalize their role before they are introduced to the party. That way there is little confusion about setting, player roles, location, etc. But to each their own, I suppose. Good video : )

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Yeah, I think when he talks about the princess and how the DM is mad at them for not taking the “obvious” romance option it was sad to see. They are right that it wouldn’t be likely something his character would know the custom of or even want to pursue… and the player themselves doesn’t know the deep lore of these things. There was no guidance like even offering a knowledge check or some social skill check to pick up on her intent with the gesture.

[@asrafkhalid1231]

oof...poor guy. i havent played any dnd/pathfinder (any ttrpg) but why treat one of your player like that ? i hope that this person managed to find a new group that are more understanding and have many amazing adventures

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

That is always what I hope for too. TTRPGs can be amazing just like how a good lobby of teammates you regularly game with can be... but when it sucks it sucks and you got to address it or move on!

[@HWolfpaws]

I always kinda look odd on these stories. DM s I have played with in my hometown had a nice rule that if a player is missing and a group wants to play, they cannot be killed or no combat that session with missing PC. and even some better DMs used to run one shots in the same worlds where present PCs could do shenanigans with one shot throwaways to even add flavor. One session you just do some shenanigans like for example a bar fight, then when your Original Characters come into a town and go to a tavern, you see the tavern keep trying to fix it up etc. Added flavour to the game world. I remember one time when the party decided to clear a dungeon and forgot/ decided not to turn in the quest to the npc because … reasons, there was one shot when we had a player missing and DM ran it like this. Run of the mill party gets hired by peeved NPC to clear a dungeon from monsters cursing adventures being unreliable, our group makes it s way trough the dungeon shitting bricks as we go in and see the destruction. We re all in like what the hell can do this? Corpses, scorchmarks, we investigate and get all Columbo Style, and burst laughing when we realize we re the guys sent into the same place after the Original Party got done with it and forgot to say it got done. It was kinda cool tool also to show how consequences work after the party leaves. I always wonder at adversarial DM s and That guys…. Good tip is to have session 0 and have it cleared how will be PC deaths be handled : is there revivals or something like spells due to lore, and when can a new character be introduced if that happens, and also what rules are there for everyone to follow in case of a missing character or PVP. GURPS system had one trait called common sense costing few points that did this: when you do something stupid or that guy act: GM tells you you re doing a dumb act. Some DMs used this into DnD as well: you do too much stupid things your next feat point is going to get that homebrew feat Common Sense mandatory. Why kill a character by a fiat it makes no sense

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Please leave a like and share your thoughts on the story! Was this player the jerk or was it the DM and the party being unreasonable?

[@mentalrebllion1270]

I overslept one of my games because I had overheated that day (context: my family dragged me outside for too long due to relatives visiting and I overheat very easily and it was summer already). So I had taken a nap and completely forgot about the game, mostly because of those relatives visiting but yeah, also just forgot because of how tired I was. So I get a notification on my phone that’s a private message from the dm asking where I am, it’s already 30 minutes past start time by this point. I quickly apologize and mention I overheated and fell asleep and hop online. They all reassured me it was ok and understandable and they were at least glad I didn’t overheat too bad. So that was the one time I missed a session because I slept in. I have missed a few other sessions but most of those ended up canceled for that time because of other things going on with more than just me, so I don’t count them. I did miss two others but it was because I had a negative reaction to my meds or was coming down with something and had to cancel midway after realizing my health was not good enough to keep up for 4 hours. (One of those I was so dizzy the room was spinning and it took me a bit to even safely get out of my desk chair after I logged out of the call). I usually try not to cancel or be late though because, and I inherited this fun trait from my dad who is ocd and nurtured this trait into most of my siblings and I, it causes me great anxiety to be late for something I agreed to be at by a certain time.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

I think most healthy groups understand that things can happen and the fact that this party was so malicious about it is a sign that the writer and this party didn’t have a healthy dynamic (which I think is just further evidence that they are better off without the party). I do think that anytime you can give the heads up it’s appreciated but things do come up! I’m sure your party was much nicer about it.

[@JamesTDG]

Same thing here. Being slowed down because of random bullshit absolutely triggers me. I also can be easily distracted by other tasks I am given, so for example, I am baking myself some food, and my grandma comes in to give me a bunch of stuff when my timer is at 5 minutes, half an hour later I get fucking charcoal and can't eat because I was pushed away from my primary task.

[@lingricen8077]

You sound like a fairy and your family deserves better than you.

[@FirstnameLastname-bp2pg]

I think the bigger concern should be with your family

[@mentalrebllion1270]

@@FirstnameLastname-bp2pg oh I’m well aware and discussions on boundaries and not crossing my dnd days has been made thoroughly clear. These incidents are far fewer than they used to be. However, I am still a caretaker in my family, between my parents not being very able-bodied, my grandmother having moved in, and my sister dropping off her baby when she is absolutely overwhelmed (the rarest of instances). So, yeah, family is what it is and the incident I discussed here is when my great-aunt visited which is a very rare occurrence. She loves exploring and being outdoors, and like I said, I have the caretaker role so I went along more due to that than anything else. Yes, I’m aware this is a more family problem. It’s being worked on. Still in-progress changes.

[@legateelizabeth]

... but we don't know if the backstory was erased though. Like, this character was being told this by a TRICKSTER GOD. Which means there's a very solid chance that the God is lying, and is doing so to manipulate the character. But you can't tell the player that without spoiling the surprise, so... feels a bit like jumping the gun here. Maybe the DM was assuming the OP was genre-savvy enough to realise that, because their friends would be?

[@LibraritheWizardOfficial]

Maybe, but I really doubt it. Remember, this is the same DM who killed their character while they were away, then used the "'gaslight' magic word + instablock" combo. The real trickster god was -the friends we made along the way- the DM all along.

[@JosmaMeric]

Don't retcon backstory, I'll go ahead and add that near the top of my list of things to avoid.

[@DHTheAlaskan]

Sounds like the GM never wanted OP in the group to begin with but didn't want to have the conversion. So they do this crap instead.

[@ItsMrBozToYou]

I missed one session of Call of Cthulhu and half of our party died, while the other half went insane/got sentenced to death for murder. Don't leave zombie corpses lying around, especially not with heads still attached.

[@malikevans634]

The part that hits close to home is the part where OP was banned, and everyone else involved refuses to elaborate or explain when you try to talk it out. Too afraid to talk things out? Think the one banned is some sort of villain beyond reason? Did they never like you to begin with? Who knows?

[@Vastspartan]

Bunch of pussies

[@ThatNewZDude]

Oh god. Its been a while since I heard THIS story. Yeah horror to the max. Cardinal sins all around. Taking away agency and retconning background. This person in my opinion isn't the problem. This group was the problem. As for the 'gaslighting', could be worse. They could have been trying it in DMS. Asking in Public Chats how best to approach the DM via the DM's friends is not a bad idea. If anything, it gives you ammo in public chat if its deleted by the dm or they give you actual advice. Since you don't know the DM but they do. Yeah it can be interpreted in a bad way. But depending on the advice if its good. Can prevent you from accidentally stepping on any toes when trying to settle matters.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Yeah taking away agency is always a deal breaker for me in these stories!

[@ThatNewZDude]

@@lootgoblinmarketplace Oh most definitely. But it depends on the situation really. (Not defending those who do it for their DMPC Deus Ex Machinas or whatever. I'm meaning like. If there's a story reason I.E Hold person, etc, etc.)

[@stevenmike1878]

i think this is when a dm uses there power at the table as a failed writer, rather then as a referee. the referee dm is constantly trying to improve the mechanics of the game and the social mechanics of the table. the writer Failed writer DM is trying to force a story beyound what is socially acceptable. they bassically try to "game of thrones" other people characters as a shock value, when they are not there characters to kill off in the first place.

[@jediping]

For those who find it hard to make friends, those we have online are just as valuable as those we know in person. And sometimes they feel closer if we feel more comfortable writing our feelings than speaking them. Just because they’re in a different time zone doesn’t mean they’re in a different place in our heads and hearts. Really sucks to lose them, especially when you’re not even sure what you did to cause the loss.

[@ThPFreitas]

My DM usually invents some shenanigans to remove the missing players from the session, the only time he didn't do that, because we stopped the last session when we entered a room filled with monsters, our AFK druid died, but we brought him back.

[@0Maloy1]

I feel like these stories are all by the same three dms lol. Like all the terrible things they do sound so similar to each other. We just need to out names and start recovery groups for these players

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

I do feel like we almost need archetypes to name these DMs, so many people making the same kinds of mistakes for sure!

[@pedroalves5187]

Oh yeah, I know how that is. We were playing a homebrew campaign, high mortality rate. I think I was on my 3rd or 4th character, don't quite remember. We were in a combat session, some dangerous combat stuff against some advanced spellcasters. I was using a flying archer fighter, and managed to dish out a lot of damage. Then I got called away to take care of something, and was gone for like, 20 minutes or so. When I was back, I discovered I got hit with a polymorph+disintegrate combo. Totes dead. No way of coming back, lost all my items and whatnot. Did not feel good, but oh well, I just rolled another character, who got killed 2 or so sessions later.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Yeah it never feels good, and that combo sounds cruel to pull on someone away let alone someone actively playing. You got to warn the players that a villain has that up his sleeve.

[@cidlunius1076]

9:39 The better version of this advice is: if you're going to vent, don't vent to your mutual friends, just vent to some strangers across the internet like you did with your post.

[@jkdragonjk6895]

The only time I feel like it’s ok to kill a character when the player isn’t at the table is if the player knew that this was going to be their death before hand. Like if they wanted to bring in a new character and this was set up as a way to take your old character out of the story.

[@K0twiczak]

I am so sorry for this guy. I hope he have found a better group.

[@MrKite]

The DM and their group of sheep are in the wrong. OP had his character killed without his knowledge and basically told his backstory was non-canon. Dude had the calmness of a saint and reacted WAY better than most people would.

[@sebastianmarrano5608]

Few things I would advise for Op: 1: call out DM for breaking the rules and being a terrible person 2: Don’t let DM gaslight you

[@GraiXS]

During a 3 year long rpg campaign we had a player who would semi-regularly miss sessions due to real world stuff, and the group collectively decided that their character had caught pneumonia and whemever they were missing their character was resting due to a flare up. Simple in game lore for the lack of their character and reason for their character not to participate. Easy.

[@sovietstarfishproductions5019]

On the note of not retconning backstories, what do i as a DM do if i am given an intentionally vague and open backstory?

[@sovietstarfishproductions5019]

For my example, the paladin for the party i run is a amnesiac that was turned into a living weapon. And that’s all i have to work off of. So do ask him to flesh it out more or do i use it as a tool for potentially good storytelling

[@BigFoxMGS]

You tell him to work on a real backstory, the hole amnesiac thing only works if you the DM and player work on the backstory together wholeheartedly. If you got a lazy player that wants a amnesiac PC then he just going to do what ever he wants on the fly because he got no character traits to define him. Basically CN on crack.

[@Tenderleaf]

I always make intentionally vague and open backstories so the DM can fill in blanks that fit the story they wants to tell. I do however expect them to check with me if I'm ok with whatever storyelements he/she wants to add. Don't need the full details, but if you're going to make my character a wanted man for mass-murder while I'm playing a paladin, because I said in my backstory my character left the city he was born and raised in because of some personal issues, I might just take issue with you springing that on me during a session without talking to me about it first...

[@FaisLittleWhiteRaven]

This is a bit late but I'd advise asking the player if they'd be alright with that and then what kind of stories they like, where they're hoping to take this character and what are some things they want you to avoid like the plague just to make sure your ideas are a good fit for what they are willing to play (good odds they'll blank on what you mean until you give examples so maybe list some loose ideas like 'chosen one', 'clone', 'amnesiac who is the polar opposite now of who they used to be' etc and see how they respond to the idea of their character being one of those even if none of those things are a part of your plot since well, players tend to be lot more clear about their story likes and dislikes when they've got examples bringing them to mind). Also, not every player actually wants their backstory to be all that relevant so you might just have to accept a 'No' and move on. I know that seems weird but some players really do enjoy only having to worry about what is happening right now in the actual game so it can really help a lot just to make sure you're not stepping on their toes by doing something like that. (Also having a 'behind the curtains' "Actually nope, that backstory was a lie set up by faction whatever and its actually something else" panic option to retcon/butterfly away your retcon if it turns out the player *really* doesn't like how this new backstory works with their character is something I heavily recommend setting up just in case, though here's to hoping its never actually needed). Hope that helps, if not for the actual game you asked for, then eventually

[@PriceMw123]

DM's should never write over a character's backstory... It's only in-between the lines that a DM can play with their work. I love seeing DM's interpret what happens after what I wrote and bringing back a character as a friend or foe. I've always had a great deal of fun reacting to those changes!

[@vampire9545]

Ahh yes, don't vent just directly confront them 😆

[@bradwolf07]

This DM infuriates me. I feel for the OP. Did they make some mistakes? Yeah, they did. But clearly the group was (and especially the DM,) were toxic

[@thewritingrowlet2980]

No offense but your description is missing a space

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

No offense taken at all! I fixed it and I'm always happy when someone can point out a quick fix like that.

[@SinogardNunitsuj]

​@@lootgoblinmarketplace what about things that are not a quick fix?

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

@@SinogardNunitsuj I'll try my best to implement them but sometimes it might take a video or two to master it :)

[@janinecat1865]

I remember when we accidentally killed a player character while the player was away. He was in a slave cage wagon which we sent into the river while in combat with the wagon's escorts and the guards were way too strong to defeat quickly or to disengage with. Poor bastard drowned slowly round after round and the river was just barely deep enough to cover his face.

[@LibraritheWizardOfficial]

A PC died to a Balor's vorpal blade while her player was away during an intense battle in one of our D&D games. The next combat round, my Cleric shoved her head back on and cast a resurrection spell. DM elected not to level drain her. 😂

[@knighttemplaroftentacult7123]

Ah... Taking away the freedom of the character. I had that done to me once. DM altered my backstory without me knowing it in order to introduce a new player in the ongoing campaign. It almost ended in the PvP that session he did and, yeah, the campaign ended very shortly after...

[@MrRaposaum]

As a GM, don't EVER decide that a player's backstory is not what they tell you it is. This is a part of the game that is theirs, not yours. If they declare that there are parts of the story that they're letting up for the GM to fill the blanks, then just fill the blanks. Every time a GM doesn't respect this, the player quits the game - for good reason.

[@chairboi7160]

imagine being the main character and being killed offscreen

[@chrismagyari1505]

dodged a bullet w this one tbh, dont wanna be part of that mess!

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Yeah, I wouldn't want to stick around after that retcon either!

[@TOMMY716]

High chances the princess was a cell phone sir maybe she had crush on the dude and when he turned down the princess he turned Down here so if anything she got sold to you about it

[@Poko0Chan]

it was ... like the character was not really wanted there and just ... tollerated

[@AlastorNahIdWinRadioDemon]

As for the actual D&D of it all, I've never killed a players character because they missed the session. I did get close ONCE as the player missed the session before we ended up in the most balanced combat wed ever had up to that point that felt like a PC or NPC ally could have died with one wrong move, and his character, being the parties main tank, ended up getting hit a few too many times. Additionally, an NPC ally who went over to save him rolled a Nat 1(Which I run to where they can end up hitting anyone around them, even still the initially targeted enemy with reduced damage. I roll a die based on the number of feasible targets around them, which this time was a D4.) And he hit the PC, giving him two failed death saves. Within the next turn the party did manage to finish off the last enemy and get a healing potion to him to prevent his death(He also suceeded on his Death save on his turn.) Truth be told, I was going to fudge the rolls for his survival anyways because I didn't want to do that to my player, but still. I also want to state that the party did have access to a Cleric with high level resurrection spells, as well as the funds to do so, or possibly make a side quest out of it if they wanted it for free/at a reduced price, so even had he died it wouldn't have been in a manner made with the intention of hurting the player and actually would have been something I'd have given them wasy access to fixing.

[@jonathandrawdy9818]

you know when i dm i felt bad for asking a player if rather than being from a different city have the character be from the city the campaign takes place in before the campaign started and i told them they had every right to tell me no to my offer. i couldn’t imagine saying no your backstory is a lie

[@JamesTDG]

10:52 exactly, be polite, ask them if some things can be moved around a bit, don't just thanos snap the story into something different

[@Aelanna]

The DM and his group were the assholes. You're better off finding a new group.

[@demityrant1784]

Damn you, Discord Tribalism.

[@nicodinisi]

take a shot every time the author says “farm boy”

[@sm901ftw]

I completely agree with everyone saying what the DM did was BS, but it does seem pretty weird that not only the DM but everyone else blocked them immediately when they complained. The DM overreacting I buy, but the whole group? Though as mentioned maybe it's just how online groups tend to work.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Online groups definitely can be like that with a new player because it’s easier to just all to gang up on the stranger instead of admitting their friend is in the wrong.

[@meyatetana2973]

I used to play AD&D I played with close friends and we just had fun but if this happened to me I'd just leave the game right then and there after yelling at the DM for being a big asshole infront of everyone and then leave.

[@kyuven]

I wanna try playing devil's advocate here. The player was absent without notice, the DM was dealing with some real life junk, and then the OP comes back and rather than taking the obvious bait to get back in the game, they give a non-commital answer. Then rather that deal with the DM directly, said person asks the rest of the group what to do. The DM sounds like a complete control freak but I think the OP may be leaving out details.

[@ZedRen-s8g]

I want to respond to this comment a bit. The last sentence, that is how I feel often about any horror story is that we miss out on context and details. Could the OP be a bit more culpable? Maybe, maybe not. Knowing that they were helping a friend through some stuff is noble. The step in the wrong direction is not letting the other players and DM ahead of time. Following that in the trend of actions in the wrong is talking about the DM after the DM leaves. Usually better to address that out of session with the DM, and as close to a neutral mediator as you can have. This isn't perfect but has helped my group...when the DM is one willing to listen. I don't wish add to the dog-pile on the DM that the comments do. The DM is at fault to a degree, if what is said is true. There are two, very much wrong actions taken here by the DM. After these it's reactionary behavior in full effect. 1: Using the PC of a missing player. I get that you are at a set point in the story, and writing a PC out for a session can be a hard task. But playing, and killing the PC of a player not present is never a good thing. If this DM was in such a bad mood, either cancel session, or play something else to take their mind off things. Having a bad day, or a bad mood does not absolve someone of wrong-doing. If I am having a bad day, or in a depressive funk, I have the self-awareness to know that it affects my ability to be the best DM I can be. I will cancel the session to allow myself time to balance out, and reschedule the session. 2: Immediately nullifying a Player Characters backstory for a cheap retcon that adds nothing. It's lazy shock value that will, more often then not, make a player leave the game or lose interest in playing. It's better to add to a backstory, never take away from one, or throw it all away.

[@Vastspartan]

Dm sounds like a fucking pussy

[@Celestial_Reach]

best way to deal with this.... stay silent, and go old man henderson on the MOFO

[@SebasTian58323]

One thing I slightly disagree with is not reconning character backstory. Let me preface this by saying that don't do what this DM did. However, you can make big reveals about a character backstory if it's baked in and actually makes a lot of sense as a reveal, or even work with the player to come up with ideas and reveal them in game.

[@Shannon4710]

I think in cases like that it is important to communicate with the player to see how they feel about parts of their backstory first. They may feel more strongly about some specific parts of their characters backstory than others.

[@SebasTian58323]

@@Shannon4710 that's fair, when I make DnD backstories I try to bake in a few plot hooks for the DM, and I just hope they do something with them

[@dcbandit]

I feel like the DM was hitting on the author through the princess character, and took his character's reaction too seriously. I am not surprised he missed it, autism really makes it hard to see when you are in it. Still, killing his character and blocking him entirely for not understanding is just too far, and not even making it clear why is just the worst.

[@CrashCraftLabs]

bad DMs will always be bad DMs specially with a group of yes men who say nothing in fear of exile, dude is better off without the toxic group of enemies. when they said gas lighting they were projecting if it went down as said... they dont ever actually have fun playing and its sad they act like that, thats why dont put much investment into my chars anymore, ill rp sure, but its not like when i started and when they die to stupidity my next char is more goofy, die again and the next is even more off the wall. ill literally play a sticker if it keeps up, chars dying is fine, chars dying cause of failed use of mechanics or spite weeeelll

[@reverendmorgano9659]

From that story it sounds like there was a great deal of immaturity in all parties involved. Communication is always the key to avoiding conflict and they all failed miserably at it. There is no excuse for a DM to behave the way that one did but at the same time it sounds as though both the author's and the DM's choices and lack of experience is what initially lead up to the conflict to begin with. The reason why I say this is because there was an inherent flaw with the character that is always a role play killer and it's not what most might think. An experienced DM would never have allowed it and instead would have pointed it out to the player and discussed making appropriate changes before their first session.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Yeah immaturity seems to be a common thread in these kinds of stories. Communication is key and an immature group will always do a bad job of sharing their thoughts until it’s well past a boiling point!

[@reverendmorgano9659]

@@lootgoblinmarketplace Exactly.

[@skynotaname2229]

This... this is exactly why I would never want to play a dnd game with people I've never met in person online. I feel like the anonymity of the internet and online chat can really bring out the worst in people. They no longer have any fear of being rude or forceful.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

Yeah, I try to stick with in-person friends. I could see playing with people I’ve met through discord, but if they invite me to a D&D game with another circle of friends there is still a lot of unknowns! I would hope this friend wouldn’t bring me into a bad group… but you really never know.

[@SammaclauseGamgee]

Oof. Im told that I dont need to tell people Im autistic when I plan on getting to know them, but I think I actually do because of things like this--they act like you were some kind of deliberate a-hole, when you had no idea you did something wrong.

[@wolfblaide]

It's so bad that a DM would just take over a player's character like this. It's been a long time since I played, but I've never heard of a DM doing this. Bizarre. It's so antithetical to the game.

[@arcamean785]

Yeah I'd have to blacklist that DM, you don't get to take all my work then kill my character while I'm not event here and without permission then retcon my entire story. I'd put them on blast because taking away my character is bad enough but gaslighting me like that? Naw you want fire I'll bring the kerosene. The whole think reeks of "I don't like you, but I'm too much of a coward to say it so I'll ruin the game for you haha suffer".

[@masonmachell683]

The best way to avoid all toxic dms and pcs is to just play with your siblings or something if you have any

[@DylVan-k8y]

Curious on how he contacted the group after the fact. He mentioned he was autistic so I’m so I’m wondering how exactly he talked/texted them. I would imagine the tiefling player would have been more talkative. Maybe I’m just a more cautious but curious person that if someone else mentions something like gaslighting, I’m more inclined to try and get all viewpoints of a story to come up with my own opinion on the matter rather than take one’s side from just their story.

[@deathtaco4095]

not to go all karma conspiracy but i feel like were missing so major information. why would all members simultaneously just diced to full on excommunicate a guy over what? missing one game night? it dosnt add up

[@AlastorNahIdWinRadioDemon]

This kind of just feels like a pre-established group of neurotypicals(Who also sound narcisstic to me) bullying a neurodivergent person because they overslept once for a session.

[@RainMakeR_Workshop]

Yeah... That's NOT a DM.

[@Maddog3060]

The OP who posted this story was clearly not an A-hole. That group sounds like a bunch of psychos.

[@junglejim6230]

And it's discord. Just keep screenshots of your convos

[@DarkRaven18599]

Nobble blows goats.

[@Jash_F]

this group sounds toxic he dodged a weird group

[@xionne7849]

personally I think that if it was only the god trying to trick the character into belive him but it was a lie and the pc back story was unchange it would ok and maybe intresting if done well but the part where the pc was killed is to far. For me it is the player and the player only who as to kill their pc ether because they whant to change character or because of their mistacke/bad roll.

[@Emolt76]

Jesus Christ, this was just.. depressing to listen to.

[@davidlazerz8564]

Im sorry, but this whole story seems like it is missing a whole mountain of context. I have no doubt there are terrible DMs like the one described here, but whenever it comes to what the author "did" it gets really vague and in my experience that usually means they did stuff they don't want to admit to or know it will make them look bad. I'm sure its possible that it could have happened exactly like this, but I think its more likely all parties involved including the author were engaged in shenanigans and the entire group finally exploded from the pressure of it all. I never really like "drama" stories on these dnd greentext reads because they almost always seem onesided and/or exaggerated to make the author look innocent/good.

[@IcsulX]

It's especially not eXpecially ffs

[@maxvandermerwe]

I am on the low scale of the autism scale. i dont know why i said this i just did so lol

[@will88840]

It really feels like something was left out of this story. For everyone to have such a visceral reaction i have to wonder if some strong words were said by OP after the session that are being ommited or downplayed in this story.

[@harz632]

The fucking edge overload, jesus

[@adrianinwinter]

This is absolutely a case of the DM and group trying to soft-remove OP from the party. We've got one side of the story here, and while it was handled very poorly on the part of the DM, there's certainly more to this.

[@Stiggandr1]

This story reeks of a half truth. I'm curious what else took place in this group.

[@lootgoblinmarketplace]

That is definitely something always to keep in mind when listening to RPG Horror Stories. I still try to take a lesson out of them all!

[@EnraiChannel]

Yeah in the end it's just one side of the story. But the author also said they are autistic and don't know if they did something wrong. Overall it's still a red flag if DM kills someone when they aren't attending the game, and even bigger when they mess with the character's backstory like that. Even the whole gift thing is weird if it went as the original poster said, basically blaming the original poster for not reading minds. And the unfortunate thing is that if you join a established friend group, that group will mot likely stick together against you even if they are in the wrong.

[@schwarzerritter5724]

About half of D&D Horror Stories can be summed up as: Problem player keeps breaking the social rules I did not establish, no matter how hard I am rolling my eyes. This is those stories from the other side.

[@wallefan3]

Ah, my daily reminder to not play DND

[@antoniovlassa5886]

I find it hard not blaming the OP because they have a lot of the common red flags in their story and usually those people do things that are bad that they don't know are bad

[@DianaTaffie]

Could you please list those red flags? Because i do not see a single one.

[@schwarzerritter5724]

Kind of. About half of D&D Horror Stories can be summed up as: Problem player keeps breaking the rules I did not establish, no matter how hard I am rolling my eyes. This is those stories from the other side.

[@swizzler]

It honestly sounds like there was more to the story here that wasn't told. It's very clear the group was not comfortable with something in OPs backstory, as the DM tried to first kill off that character, and then when they just didn't come back with a new character and instead try and revive it, get them to in-lore reroll it by saying it was all a dream. In my experience, throwing something like SA casually into a story ain't cool, because it's forcing players and DMs to contend with that, when they're just trying to have fun. I'd love to hear the other players side of the story, because I'm guessing it'd be wildly different than OPs.

[@mr.nilraps]

Unfortunately this person’s story isn’t enough information to determine whether she is the problem here or not. Taking everything at face value, sure, it certainly seems like the DM is in the wrong but how can we take “everything” at face value? First, we don’t know if everything this person said was true nor do we know if it’s the whole story. Second, we don’t know the other people’s side of the story or their perspective. What we do know is that everyone in the group agreed with the DM. Actually they didn’t just agree, they took the DM’s side to the point of blocking contact with this person who was running another one of their games. That level of response is significant. It doesn’t tell us the whole story but it does tell us there’s more to the story that we aren’t being told and that suggests the OP isn’t being truthful.

[@RatKingDelta]

This doesnt make sense to me at all, suddenly having the DM block him was one thing but then the entire group who where going to be in his next campaign block him aswell? What? Why? Like are they just mindless sheep following the DM? Did they all actually just hate the guy and where just using this as an excuse to kick him out?

[@andrewdarby8843]

This story feels like we only have half of the story here and that the reason the player was kicked had nothing to do with the information they've given us here. All of the players seemed to agree this player was the problem and the moment an accusation of gaslighting comes in, we've got to start questioning what we hear from the accused gaslighter. The fact that even Tiffie blocked the guy after he does the whole 'I don't know what I did wrong' thing feels like it's telling. Pretending you don't know what you did wrong and pretending the only explanation you've been given is something that was made clear to you was not the actual problem is gaslighting 101.

[@orlandodiciccio2748]

I still can’t find a single story that is remotely believable. This is either made up for content number purposes, or taken from Reddit by pathological liars who probably have several mental conditions. There’s no way all these people in every video are insane. Way more plausible that only the person telling the story is nuts. These videos are really a waste of time

[@hadeseye2297]

"DM Kills Character When They(??????) Are Away " A character is a single person. So you made an error by using they.

[@corberus3119]

incorrect they can be used as singular in place of he or she, typically used when gender is unknown. the error in the title is using are instead of were

[@Daniel-ym4to]

kills character, completely destroys backstory, no explanation, immediately kicked, all the hallmarks of a great dm