Do You Agree? | Listen To Black Women

[@kanamexzeroxyuuki]

Who is "our" black men? I don't have any🤷🏾‍♀️🤣

[@dustdivesterover4782]

MY😳LAST "MALE INTEREST" WAS LATINO ( A FLING ) BUT, LONG - TERM, I HAD A WM😁💙 (R I P)

[@Msladyrae92]

🤣😂

[@ShaeDaily]

Right! 😂😂😂 they don’t belong to me!

[@Antoinethecool]

I guess it’s implied black women are related to at least one black man or know some

[@bharris4517]

🥴🥴🥴 Yep, speak for yourself. Most of us are tired of this struggle mentality and not repeating our mothers’ mistakes🥱🥱🥱

[@madamelogicbombdropperblac7799]

Black love = poverty and pain. I've seen it in the eyes of too many black women.

[@Nic-zs9yf]

Girl reat shit!

[@saints0538]

Your mothers picked thugs!!

[@444shleyyy]

YUP, SAY IT AGAIN!

[@SEXgoddess.]

Exactly I’m so over it

[@887-s5c]

She’s apart of the problem. I said wtf I said

[@ecclairmayo4153]

She is pickme real bad

[@tajthegreatone9326]

Agreed

[@internet_dude]

no you are, you and your kind are haters and one of the reason the blk community is fked up. she spoke facts. some men need an actual partner to build with from the ground up. if a man is abusive or cheats, leave him but if hes a good man that needs emotional support its a different story. but go ahead and run to a different race, procreate and breed your blackness out of the genepool

[@mybestlifefortherestofmyli7137]

All day. I thumbs down this. I can't with her. She's so sympathetic for them, the mom was single mothers bc he left the woman. Wtf. State facts and stop beating around it. She is so weak and yes shes a pick me all day and keep making excuses for them. This is the woman that gets walked over!! I'm just being honest, I'm so tired of these black men. I'm just turned off from black men I prefer someone outside my race all day or a biracially mixed man, I find them HOT!! I don't find BLACK men attractive anymore. I'm sorry!! (They say they don't like black women, why can't I have a preference.)

[@markeyosef1579]

I agree!

[@bakigwaze90]

You're alive! That's the standard? 🤣

[@lolo8288]

Don't forget "TRYING" 🙄

[@afroaffirmations]

Imagine setting your bar so low as he’s “trying” to not “unalive” me so im winning 🤦🏾‍♀️

[@Dancing_on_Kitten_Heels]

She was so serious with it too. I know I was bad back in the day but damn. He’s alive? 😳🤣😂🤣😂 What if he was just a lil’ bit dead? 😆You know she’s one of those breathe life into a dusty sistas. I can’t 😂😂😂

[@RealJahjah]

Lmao ok cause I thought I was tripping 🤡💀

[@krystleeverett7843]

😂

[@turnthepage867]

What a crock. Speak only for yourself lady.

[@YouTubeTeacherRemote]

Pacifying is for babies not grown men. Black women have endured more Racism and sexism having only one of those that men have suffered. The black man has been killed but so has the black women to the point of rape and forced to bring up the child. The black woman should be pacified but we know only pacifying will make us weaker. My parents have been together 49 years this year. Grew up in black south, had properties burned and taken yet no one pacified them. They have always pushed each other to greatness and despite what the world threw at them they not only survived but excelled. My narrative has ALWAYS been he's so strong that he's still here now he can overcome anything! The pacified black man in not one I would ever be attracted to because I was raised by one who achieved greatness through it all and is still here at 82.

[@EbikeAdventures667]

Here we go again, black women playing victim when you literally got dudes simping over you, making themselves look like dang fools sacrificing their lives for black women who could careless about them.

[@YouTubeTeacherRemote]

@@EbikeAdventures667 as a happily married woman here I have no need nor room for said term "simp" made up by a society of individuals that think name calling is the solution to something they don't understand, like or subscribe to. No man on earth is beneath another unless he shows his value in petty worthless activity and shenanigans

[@ckbond41]

I hear what you say, truly. But don't you think the American system, got it out for black men. I hope you know the system (government) was the ones who bought the drugs and guns in the black community. That in itself courses a lot of problems.

[@Yoga-yz3nf]

Black women you don’t have to struggle with a man it does not equate love it only equates pain heart ache and much more , take a page out of the other races of women’s books.

[@Nic-zs9yf]

Im loving these comments BTW. I'm very proud of us! Death to struggle love!

[@ecclairmayo4153]

☠️⚰️

[@redbouquetaida1598]

Don't like her message. Black women operate under the same system and we find ways to pull ourselves up. Stop dating and coddling men who don't want better for themselves.

[@kamariasia]

Period!!! We have to navigate while being disadvantaged on 2 fronts... race and gender!

[@HumptyMcFly]

Black women are the most evicted in America. Exactly how have y’all pulled yourselves up? What you need to do is get off this divisive bull 💩 rhetoric and finds ways to reconnect with each other instead of keeping the shenanigans going.

[@madamelogicbombdropperblac7799]

I agree! Let these non black women be the new face of single baby mama and pain.

[@jacoreywilliams5924]

I think y'all misunderstanding what she's saying.

[@kingkunta5628]

Struggle with me now baby and we will be doing okay later 🥺🫶🏿

[@kitay5196]

This makes me sick to my stomach quite honestly

[@peachesjohnson9387]

Lol

[@advice4u409]

Burn the cape BW and save yourselves! Let go of the struggle love and thrive!

[@kashnation8980]

There you go 💯💯🗣

[@ckbond41]

I do not think you really understand what she said..smh

[@justicethomas109]

THIS 💯💯💯

[@ihaveautism666]

lmaoooo

[@MoneybagJimmy]

Thrive and buy a cat. Lonely

[@loveheals482]

Sry, I left my cape at the cleaners.... indefinitely.

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Burn it!🔥

[@kamariasia]

Yall keep on pacifying and making excuses for them if you want to. Don't come back on here crying about being a single mom and how tired and overworked you are. This is why.

[@ChantalesprettylittleDIYS]

Exactly 💯. I did just that as the breadwinner. It goes beyond that. We cannot continue to pour unto them and heal them. They need a therapist for that.

[@idomalion6167]

@@ChantalesprettylittleDIYS Perhaps you should take the hint and understand abandoning is a sign of disinterest and time to move on. Marry before you carry.

[@ChantalesprettylittleDIYS]

@@idomalion6167 I moved on a long time ago. However, the black community needs to stop teaching this narrative. A man is as loyal as his pockets. Therefore, we shouldn't tell people to be with potentials, even when he doesn't make enough money to provide for his family. That's the reason black men feel like they can just sho up in a relationship with nothing. Black women needs rest. Even in a biblical context when David slayed Goliath, and the king promised him resources and his daughter, that was his way of proving his manhood. But we're telling black women to coddle men who should take time away from dating to build himself prior to starting a family is wrong. This struggle narrative needs to stop

[@idomalion6167]

@@ChantalesprettylittleDIYS Woman was created from man as his help mate by God. If she's not a help mate she's not the one for you.

[@ChantalesprettylittleDIYS]

@@idomalion6167 OK I see where your mindset is so I'll just end this discussion now

[@ka8204]

Hell no I don’t agree. What was done to them was done to us and we still have to buss our ass out here

[@annann3802]

Listen, black women need to set standards, boundaries, and expectations. Don't allow your mother's story to become your story....Stop making excuses...Black men and black women are under the same system. If you as a black woman can become successful so can he..smh

[@brandnew9834]

What do you deem to be ‘success’? From what I can see, there are a lot of educated black women carrying a ton of debt and working mediocre paying jobs. The average blk man is actually unmarried, solidly middle class, and childless. This narrative about blk women being so much more successful is not real.

[@annann3802]

@@brandnew9834 The average black man has a child or a bus filled with baby momma and ain't in middle class...Sorry, not sorry. The data is out there to prove it..Yall have a high illiteracy smh

[@JuwanBuchanan]

​@@brandnew9834 You are the only person that knows what they've talking about from what I seen

[@ecclairmayo4153]

​@@brandnew9834 - not inprisoned, taking care of children instead of ABANDONING them, owning homes, working together etc.

[@brandnew9834]

@@ecclairmayo4153 Gotta stop you there. Most black men actually don’t have kids and solidly middle class earners. Most black women just choose to procreate with the 20% or so who are losers. At the end of the day, black women are out here making absolutely illogical life choices. Ask the REAL question: why are so many black women having risky sex with guys who have kids by multiple women…none of whom they married? Why would a black woman who has seen other black women go through hell on earth trying to be single moms make the same bad choices? How can a black woman criticize a delinquent black man, when in fact that man was raised by someone almost exactly like her? You should Google the Myth of Lilith. The story mirrors black women with almost freakish accuracy.

[@dojakatt1724]

Yet, BM will be the first to call BW gold diggers!

[@mrredd8439]

These BM you're talking about, who raised them?

[@brendajoyce1858]

The only thing I'm seeing in the comment section is Gold diggers, every women in here said it's a deal breaker if he can't provide everything she wants

[@ecclairmayo4153]

​@@mrredd8439 - Well, certainly by their black fathers who abandoned them😐

[@chrisishere6503]

​@@mrredd8439 Not a black man...thats for sure...cause one thing you all know how to do is give a BW a baby and thats it. A man needs a man to raise him not just a mama.

[@quentinwestbrook4]

I never asked your european ethnic for a damn thing

[@alicia7737]

The double standard is that we historically give BM a grace that is not reciprocated. You understand their plight, but rarely do they try to understand yours. I’m not doing this!!! You understand why he’s broke and struggling, but does he take the time to understand the sista who is a single mom, etc? Or does he just exploit her vulnerability?

[@kinyab5967]

Well said

[@taniciarouse8934]

You know... this is really food for thought

[@successmanifestation2769]

Exactly!

[@urbanvoice5323]

So BM being broke because of barriers which doesnt mean broke forever to BW getting pregnant, sleeping with toxic men who never wanted to commit, is the same thing? Make it make sense.

[@Facts-Over-Feelings]

WHAT ARE U TALKING ABOUT.. ALL U SAID WAS FALSE.

[@sherrycla9950]

I completely understand what she is saying historically but at the say time you have to want more for yourself. Sometimes we are in what we think to be a cycle but it's due to the decisions we make . If Black woman can make it happen (and have ALWAYS done so ❣) black men can do the same. My dad never had that system mentality .

[@carbonether2912]

@Duke Maine fr 😂 that’s why most real blackj kings are confused. Sherry cla might not choose “little boys” but most black women do choose “little boy.”

[@rah973]

Stop using the word “we” 🙄😒

[@somebodycomelistentothispo7217]

It’s 2023. loving the women’s responses. Gone somewhere with this 💩✌🏾

[@Beautyroom300]

Girl, black women go through the same if not more than what black men go through. And no one gives a damn. No man is out here laying out compassion for black women they say we deserve everything that happens to us. This male worship is nauseating.🤢

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Yup, with us its just "accountability"

[@ssbashalot7324]

@@ecclairmayo4153Yes cause y’all refuse to take any

[@ssbashalot7324]

No y’all haven’t lol

[@EyeShadowQueenn]

No stop coddling bm.

[@fredarickamichelle]

I know she damn lyin’! I absolutely rebuke this foolishness. I have to struggle and carry the WHOLE load just to love a black man?! No ma’am, no thank you!

[@ecclairmayo4153]

I agree with the rebuking!

[@tth715]

NO I do not agree. Divestment is self-love…

[@rajanne2116]

As I black woman, I cannot relate to this in anyway. We need more diversity in terms of the representation of the black American experience.

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Especially the representation of black love. It is always shown as struggle love instead

[@oneofone3770]

I’m a firm believer if you are not where you need to be mentally, emotionally, physically, and financially Stay single. You shouldn’t be worried about being in a relationship when you are working to be the best version of yourself. THAT is why there are so many single parent homes. People are in adequate in some area of their life’s and it catches up to them. Focus on self people then and only then can you find your happiness with another. Not before and not in the middle of it when it’s completed.

[@TC-ym1vk]

Are black men having conversations on how to support BW tho😂

[@lynnw2953]

No.

[@Telletell]

This. They never give us that same grace. We came from the same home structures and have adapted due to this. And some of them use it against us.

[@thomasbrown629]

@@Telletell that’s false, for real black men know what black women has gone through but remember the plite of the system, to destroy the black family is to take out the black men, the security and provider leaving the black women open to take over and destroy….we love y’all but most black men have not woken up!

[@YungEmperor305]

@@Telletell y’all bitter asf

[@ecclairmayo4153]

​@@Telletell - bingo

[@g.michaelhood28]

The woman who said no, is it your desire to be a wife? A close friend? A help meet? Can your heart give unconditional love? To just say no, actually says a lot about your mindset. Good luck

[@Dancing_on_Kitten_Heels]

Girl bye 😂 ain’t nobody got time for that bs. I am rested and divested.

[@jaysheat631]

yep, set the bar REAL Low..

[@IslandPrincess101]

As a black woman, I am tired of feeling bad for incompetent black men. I am not struggling up anymore and I want to be a princess too.

[@ssbashalot7324]

You aren’t worthy of that treatment

[@IslandPrincess101]

@@ssbashalot7324 neither was your mom

[@ssbashalot7324]

@@IslandPrincess101 Neither was your grandmother

[@mizrelmizrel]

We've been there done that. We've seen what the outcome Usually is. Cape burned Long time ago. Take care of Yourselves Black Women.

[@pamhop5831]

I noticed how those other ladies were not really agreeing with her! In fact it was killing them lol 😂😂😅👏🏾👍🏾😂

[@olumide31907]

😂😂😂

[@InfamousKillah26]

But she will be the one that ends up married. The rest will try to convince bottom shelf Chad to marry them and end up with cats and dogs.

[@ecclairmayo4153]

They knew she soundes crazy

[@ecclairmayo4153]

​@@InfamousKillah26- Yes, she will be in a struggle love marriage carring for someone else's children and working twice as hard because she would have married a loser from prison, who she will help "heal"😐

[@ssbashalot7324]

⁠@@ecclairmayo4153Majority of black men are free. I don’t know why y’all keep buying into this stereotype

[@marierhodes4735]

Imma speak for myself, that’s a no! A hard NO. I don’t want to take care of no grown ass man!

[@brendajoyce1858]

When did you hear her say anything about taking care of a man,the problem with black women is y'all put to much value in the wrong shit and y'all wonder why y'all end up bitter, because y'all pass the good man, because he doesn't make enough money to support your lifestyle,then y'all find the man who can support y'all lifestyle and settle down with him,even though he's a piece of shit, y'all are willing to overlook his character flaws,as long as he provides all the material things you desire

[@sjc5411]

Buy a good 🐕

[@eddieelliott1496]

@@brendajoyce1858 dropped 🎤💯🔥

[@pkyrispkyris208]

Be nurturing to your children, yourself and the elderly. Men are supposed to be leaders and many are proving to be the opposite and blame black women instead of looking in the mirror.

[@Serving_melanin]

Omg black woman teaching other black women to voluntarily drive the struggle bus. Just sad

[@Toyz3578]

I agree with her historical references and empathy. We just have to make sure that black men are still being held accountable. Women do not need to break their backs and do extra heavy lifting for someone who always has an excuse for as to why they cannot get ahead. I say discern each man and his situation carefully evaluating his patterns and whether he speaks as a victim or an over comer. All and all great segment ❤️❤️

[@HumptyMcFly]

Agreed but to also look at herself in the mirror and ask herself why does she keep attracting these type men. You are who you attract. It’s irritating when women like you keeping using the worst of us to define all of us. Just because that’s what you keep attracting. Like you don’t know of Robert Smith, Byron Allen, Robert Johnson, Chris Gardner, Daymond John, Reginald Lewis, Don Barden, etc etc etc. You keeping referring to pookies because that’s all who you can attract.

[@Toyz3578]

@@HumptyMcFly on Social Media ppl make generalizations all the time. Those generalizations are based on their experiences. You have to know when something does not apply to you and not feel a way. It’s a blessing to know that you’ve made it and are not apart of this demographic. People will only attract who they are

[@grownlady5023]

I agree 100%

[@RealJahjah]

@@HumptyMcFly are you insinuating that pookie is less than u?

[@ecclairmayo4153]

​@@HumptyMcFly - Did you read what she wrote? She literally said "discern EACH MAN carefully". This means she is not grouping all men together and judging by a few. You immediately got triggered and didnt even read her comment fully.

[@prosperasortuda]

My wish is to see that black women are done with the struggle live. I am Brazilian and I wish the same for us latinas too. 💝

[@504Diva]

It's not the money it's the man. But this notion that we have to carry black men because of "The System" is nonsense. Many of our grandmother's were at home raising their kids and taking care of home while black men got and kept jobs. System was just as bad for them.

[@essenceoflove1069]

So true…something else is going on then.

[@rebecca4829]

Actually, a lot of black women were never out of the workforce. There were rarely Black women serving as stay at home mothers.

[@ecclairmayo4153]

System was evem worse back then. These guys need to do better

[@gveeoh2263]

Girl no. Plz just stop

[@DM-jd6xp]

Girl, please! You sound crazy 😩😂

[@sharons5221]

!!!

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Insane

[@yvonnej5574]

Black women have went through even more. Single mothers dead beat dads, domestic violence being raped or killed for wanting a better life . Being disrespected and considered not of quality or good enough to marry just good enough to be a baby mama.

[@Manifinesser_7]

You may guide and support another person to heal, but you cannot heal them. They have to make that choice.

[@Patricia-iy3gw]

Aww!! Please lady how many years are you going to allow yourself to be a victim . Stop saying "WE" , just speak that nonsense for yourself .

[@roihollis7822]

somebody please explain what black man she talking about? what are women dating these days? homeless men?

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Apparently dead ones according to her

[@rosiebrown220]

BLK men today are letting women do their jail time

[@SadeWithTheReceipts]

Her hair is beautiful 😍

[@shabanmaulana8594]

Not only women struggling to find a good man, even some Men struggle to find a good woman. Here in UK it's the same thing.

[@Dancing_on_Kitten_Heels]

#divest

[@ashleymccook3810]

Yea, but not. If I ever have kids, they are not going to struggle. That’s where I draw the line. If we aren’t financially in the same realm, then I need you to have a vision/plan of how to get there. I don’t believe in bringing children into lack of stability and disfunction.

[@danielnelson6903]

Good woman. It’s refreshing to see a woman with your mindset. Kids do not deserve to grow up in that kind of environment, it’s not healthy.

[@ecclairmayo4153]

​@@danielnelson6903 - its also refreshing to see a man with your mindset. So many men would call her a goldigger for even thinking their children shouldnt live a life of struggle unnecessarily

[@djlivvy46]

Thank you! Black children have been raised in chaos and dysfunction for decades now, and I don't understand why we are so determined to keep repeating the cycle over and over again.

[@MilaRoseRouge]

I have never been with a black man and I guess that's why I've never been bitter.

[@TheLastDrinkZA]

The bar does not exist at this point

[@Mi_7xg_879]

BM abuse BW because of this "concept"

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Struggle love is abuse

[@bigfred3083]

I don't care wat nobody say my mom was the best women in my life I lost my mom when I was 14 and can't no woman replace her but believe me they have tried my wife is the best thing that has happened to me she loves and cares about just like my mom did loosing that black QUEEN took a lot from me but with the help of this black QUEEN I'm with now and been with for ten years I've really grown into the man I am today she loves me just as much when I was broke/broken as she does now if not more and I truly appreciate the most high god sending me this QUEEN 👑 I PRAYED FOR HER AND SHE CAME IF U WANT A WONDERFUL BLACK QUEEN JUST PRAY FOR HER AND MEAN IT FROM YOUR HEART MIND BODY AND SOUL AND SHE WILL COME JUST DONT TAKE HER FOR GRANTED WHEN U GET HER

[@nyreeshanae4031]

These black men don't wanna be healed 😒

[@BlakJakk]

All this struggle love and baby mamahood with Pookie and then blaming good brothers for not wifing old, leftover, single moms is over. Keep us out of it!!

[@flame-sky7148]

She’s talking like she’s in the superior position. Bye Felicia

[@WalkitlikeItalkitt]

Ummm no and hell no

[@qwinn111]

Black men date out cause it's hard to find good Black woman. It's hard to find good Black men too so do the same, no one wants to hold the burden of the culture.

[@HisSacredLove]

I wish black men uplifted us the way she uplifted them

[@johnstockton3150]

Y’all uplift thugs. Y’all hate good black men.

[@HisSacredLove]

@@johnstockton3150 "y'all?!" Who are "y'all?!". You speak of all black woman in general which is your problem/mistake right there. Don't blame ME (or all black women) for the choice of women YOU decided to choose/chose to be with, have been with, or choose to be your baby mama's, now you're BITTER, mad and angry at all ( "y'all") black women, using "y'all " like you know ME personally it's "y'all" who told me "you're too quiet, I need to have a lady who curse me out every now and again, you're too nice, I don't think I can be with someone like you" "y'all" are the one's going after the "big azz, fake tiTTis, punch the 🔥 out of you Bonequeshas" but had a problem with me being more into my book's, education, and goals more than being on IG, and Snapchat showing my azz for likes, "y'all" were the one's who never texted back after a "good morning, how was your day, stay prayed up/blessed" text but would see "y'all" all over sm with the ghetto hood chick up the street. So don't go there with "y'all support thug's" cause YOU are a mother fn lie. Who I do support is whoever support and uplift me, who I am down for is anyone who has a heart after GOD and who is trying to make something of himself and care's more about God than he do his Gucci, and making band's, who I am down for and will uplift are the men who actually do things for other people and his community other than help continuing to aid in it's demise. 🗣️ THAT'S who I "uplift and support" whether he be a "thug" or not, (I have plenty of male friend's who society considers "thug's" just because they're black and from the hood " but these same men ALWAYS have/had my back, and protected me when I needed them and they do more for the community than anyone else" so before you start talking out the side of your neck about me (or "y'all" ) rethink, and look at yourself and YOUR action's on who YOU choose to uplift and support cause 5x out of 10 it's BLK men who is the problem especially downing their own black women just cause "y'all" mad, Bitter, and angry at the world..🙄🤦😒so NEXT🙏

[@royalregal722]

I mean yeah ok, isn’t everyone living in the system? Idk struggling is overrated. I don’t have to struggle with you. You see the effect of stress on BW, period pain, fibroids, heart disease, weight issues. Birthing issues even unto death. Like what? No thank you. I’ll love you from the other side of the tracks.

[@sam0435]

Nope !!! We are not doormats… be nice ,kind and help within reason but never sacrifice yourself!! Only help if a man is actual helping himself and he helping you

[@tomekaslaughter1194]

Been there, done that, not doing it again.

[@samanthachildress1091]

The problem comes in when we haven’t been taught how to know our worth and/or how to protect ourselves against men who do not Have our best interest and so we get to a point where we’ve got compounded trauma from Years of being emotionally taken advantage of. The best thing for us to do at this point is to go inside and heal ourselves so we know how to identify a healthy man.

[@hampersincldt3373]

Can't encourage men to make poor financial choices. Trust me if a man is not willing to build with you most lightly he pulls you down... he won't allow you to pull him up. There are few men who can be what you're describing without insecurities, jealously, and bitterness. A real man would always want to pull his own weight. He doesn't have match what you have...but he would want to do what men were made to do . Protect and provide.

[@boomehodd1656]

Amen 🙏

[@sashaalexa8518]

what was even said?

[@danielnelson6903]

I turned the volume off half way😂 Tired of this same OLD martyr syndrome talk. It’s 2022, we are not oppressed.

[@ginihall1234]

Money is my number one if you can’t do that then don’t come my way..

[@jatmo6991]

Love, loyalty, integrity, and character all come behind money? Curious, what does your husband think of this?

[@ginihall1234]

@@jatmo6991 my husband is fine with this.. go find a wife and build her a house.

[@thekingsdale2899]

For the love of money is the root of all evil dont lose out on love for the sake of something created to make life difficult.

[@ginihall1234]

@@thekingsdale2899 it’s giving poor. My god got me worry about yourself.

[@thetruth-zb7cj]

@@thekingsdale2899 it is also the root of healthy living. Women don't want to sleep on the projects floor with the lights turned off waiting for you to back home from your 3rd baby momma house. They are choosing better!!!!

[@ohmyv3gatron]

Here’s the kicker….from someone that grew up with both parents, private school, only black family in the neighborhood…. White or black, lives with no hardships, everyone worked…. There were no Gucci bags, there’s a small handful of BMWs, I just got done telling someone my friend who’s family had a textile company and now he’s a lawyer for over a decade still has an iPhone X. Our biggest issue is we want to live a fantasy we see on IG and reality tv. Even worth 20 mil, both parents worked!

[@shanrenee2908]

I feel the narrative of black men "going through so much" is the issue. No one told them to make those bad decisions to end up in jail! Let's just be honest they weren't victims they chose to make choices that got them locked up. I feel once we stop playing victims as black people in general then we will be successful. My granny went through real oppression and became a nurse. I can't compare that to her son who chose to sell crack or get hooked on it as oppression. Only Jesus can "heal" your black man. The black men from the generation before crack were leaders in the community stop blaming the system. Everyone has a choice! Daddy not being home is a bs excuse to not do better.

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Bingo!!

[@jackhughes7840]

the fact she said “your alive and trying” shows exactly how low of standards black women have and that turns off men of every other race as well as some black men

[@The_Logician]

I respect that she came to her realization eventually, but I doubt she was always like this until time humbled her.

[@Blackbutterflysocial]

Stop allowing these people to influence y’all lives. Black men been doing what they wanted back in the 50s up to now. It’s always been the women upholding the whole black community and women need to stop accepting immature men and that would force them to either grow up or move on to someone else. Black Women go where you are respected and treated well!

[@Baller4life405]

I agree as a black man who make around 50 ,000 a year I know I am not a high value men but I know how to treat a woman well and I am loyal that is my true nature, I have no kids and I am looking for someone who has no kids that is the hardest thing in the world

[@kisha6370]

There are plenty of us that don’t have children.

[@ecclairmayo4153]

​@@kisha6370 - exactly. If anything, its harder to find a black man with no kids

[@kisha6370]

@@ecclairmayo4153 EXACTLY

[@kisha6370]

@@ecclairmayo4153 Back in the day 1 child was wow. Then years later they had 2. Now is 12

[@shuanalazette6077]

NOPE... NOPE... NOPE... NOPE... NOPE.. NOPE... NOPE... ON GOD!!! NOPE... NOPE.... NOPE... NOPE!!!

[@bohwe43]

My grandmother and mother never complained about being a black woman; I'm so over this conversation. Not every black woman shares the same experience.

[@PineapplesCoconut]

Sounds like struggle love/come up woman advice. No thanks.

[@butterflynjune6287]

This coddling and babying will only perpetuate our current plight! If we have to do what we have to do, so do they! "Keep Jordans on our feet"? No! Take that money and put it towards getting ahead in life. This way of thinking is nonsensical!

[@KingDamn23]

The fact that she said trying to keep Jordan’s on our feet, an overpriced an unnecessary good, tells me she doesn’t understand poverty. If anyone broke is buying Jordan’s instead of a weeks worth of groceries, you deserve to stay poor

[@cwoodyjr]

Despite the negativity in the comments I just want to express appreciation for acknowledging the fullness of our humanity.

[@ang-a]

We should be encouraging our men to do and be better. Not coddle them like children. It doesnt serve the community

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Exactly. No "accountability"

[@nangaeboko6710]

She is right about one thing though. BW definitely don't practice economic hypergamy.

[@sheritownsend5359]

BW have ALWAYS been like this for the reasons she gave. The definition of STRUGGLE LOVE!!

[@roberthenderson3844]

it's saddening the way this whole thing is unfolding.... working together with a structure that supports your future and your children education and the parents senior years..

[@TamiBri]

Not for me at this grown age

[@JoeJoe-gg9uc]

Maybe if black women would stop dating thugs . Maybe oh just maybe , but that’s probably never gonna change .

[@daynelcollins5208]

Like she said everyone story is not the same. Was her daddy locked up or locked out of opportunity. This is why she is more accepting. My daddy was not he was a hv red pill before it was named as such. But he blew every opportunity he had to be a good Husband and father toxic asf. I had awesome men around stellar grandfather and Godfathers, Uncles. And my issue is I don’t trust men especially ones that exhibit red pill behavior. I also grew up middle class so a trifling pookie is not acceptable either.

[@kevingeorge1539]

Exactly!!! U need to bring your money to the table also all of it

[@bobbiewright1500]

Why do black women have to be in a struggle relationship !

[@anthonygreene6819]

Appreciate her mind,thanks queen

[@VYT6171]

Perhaps black women are tolerant of a man like that in their 20’s & 30’s but trust me age 40+ that “broke black man living on love” ish is old AF

[@djlivvy46]

Lol, these Gen X girls aren't trying to hear what she's talking about. They've seen what their elders went through and they want no part of it!

[@ecclairmayo4153]

I'm so glad she finally said she speaks for herself. She said she is just happy for him to be alive!😐🥴 Pick-meism has reached new heights...or better yet, new lows

[@samusami7439]

The comments passed the vibe check. 🎉🎉

[@Donique_23]

You know what I never see..... conversations about how black women treat other black women and how our behavior can damage the growth and image of other black women.

[@ronaldtyson-jx6qm]

Lot of black women hate the brothers. That's why I tell black men. Whatever differences we got, we need to put them aside And wrap out protection around each other because at the end of the day we all we got

[@autumnbluerose5809]

Good night..... 😴😴😴😴

[@MrKeepnit100]

I'm going to have to disagree, because I make my own money, I have the basics, I just want to be LOVED ON, not coddled there's a huge difference

[@ecclairmayo4153]

Pin this comment to the top! Most men in these comments clearly want to be coddled but we have one that wants to be an ADULT man!

[@MrKeepnit100]

@@ecclairmayo4153 now granted I'd like there to be peace when I come home and would like to be able to express what bothers me without it being weaponized later. But the gist of it is that I can take care of myself.

[@Ogasso]

Tyrone is in jail. Life goes on. 😇

[@davidsauce5051]

I have to disagree with what she’s saying because it’s the Pookies and Ray Ray that come up with excuses to be lazy. For the real black men we have a greater disadvantage in educational and financial growth. We don’t have the system to help us so we have to really pull ourselves up by our bootstraps just to get to where the real money at. We don’t have a Goldman Sachs and others investing into the black men and that’s fine because from that alone we are free to take our resources wherever we want

[@djlivvy46]

This is bigger than Pookie and Ray Ray. Black women support educated black men just like we do with the other kind and still get no return on our investment. If the 'real black men' were doing what they were supposed to do, the black community would not look the way it does. It has been shown that most of the black men claiming middle class status are there because of the amount their black wives contribute financially. However this is now changing because middle class black men are increasingly dating & marrying out. Which means that you are actually going to have to work harder, since the non black wives aren't going to be putting in the same as us. And please don't act like you don't benefit from sexism and misogyny in the workplace.

[@djlivvy46]

The Obamas launched initiatives to help black boys in 2014 & 2023. Oprah has been supporting Morehouse for decades now. So we know that people have always tried to help you. But the real question is why do you still need help from anybody? Why have the 'real black men' not banded together and pooled their resources in order to actually build something?

[@MartinX123O]

Looking @the comments we black people hate ourselves for real..! ☹️

[@royaltyinsidemydna]

Maybe your dad was in prison? Um...for what exactly?

[@opinion_girl]

Black women settle please, you cant do better. That is what I got from this video