Doctor REACTS to Heartstopper #1 (Charlie is Not Eating...)

[@laprofbarbara]

You asked whether the show gives an accurate representation of ED and OCD. I was (and still be)affected by an ED and the season broke me, I needed one weekend and a therapy session to put up everything and every feeling I felt...so, it is accurate, I felt all the pain, anxiety and desperation Charlie felt. But it gives, on the other hand, a very positive view on Charlie's recovery and journey, which gave me strength and lead me to feel positive and confident about the fact that EDs can be defeated or make them not controlling your life. A very strong and inspiring season ❤ thanks for your videos! Love them!!!

[@buddytheoc]

I have overcome an ED and SH myself. I have been "clean" for quite a while. My "bad brain days" are really in my past, so far, actually, that I don't think about it too much anymore (Which is super-privileged, I know and am thankful!.) This season, however, reminded me of all the darkness back in the days. The portrayal so accurate. For me, the whole "energy" within Charlie's family was what struck me the deepest. I am half convinced that Alice Oseman had watched my mother and me all those years, because the interaction of Charlie and his mother was just - wow. I wish you all the best, wherever you are in your journey. :) There is a life without an ED controlling you all the time. I can't promise it will disappear completely, but I can assure you, the voice may get weaker with therapy and all - until to the point where a show like Heartstopper has to remind you that you used to feel like crap.

[@mlee6050]

I think I always fail to not read ED as something that isn't to do with eating

[@AnxietyRat]

​@@buddytheoc yeah, Alice writes the parents in the comic and in the show so incredibly well I honestly don't know what type of parent they had when they were growing up because they write Charlies' moms' interactions so well... She reminds me of my own mother at times, for sure ...but Alice also writes Nicks' moms' interactions really really well... It's hard to tell if they had a Nick's mom growing up or if Nick's mom is just a projection of who they would have wanted to have as a mom... Because she's kind of perfect. She reminds me of my dad who is significantly more empathetic in general and just understanding about mental health issues.... But yeah, all around really good writing!

[@buddytheoc]

@@AnxietyRat totally, I have been wondering the same about Alice :) No matter what source they had, they really put in the effort irregardless.

[@OLDATA]

as someone with an eating disorder and ocd that rlly affects that eating disorder, it is insane how well done this series is. it managed to capture most of my struggles that i have never EVER seen represented before

[@felixhenson9926]

I'm so glad you brought up the slippery slope where researching the neuroscience of sexuality is concerned. So often medicalising things is seen as way to prove your sexuality is 'valid' bc science can never be wrong. It all becomes v eugenic.

[@DoctorElliottCarthy]

Science can definitely be wrong and one thing i love about science is that it's premise is on the fact that we don't know the answers and updating our answers as new knowledge comes to light. It's the motivation of why people are trying to answer this question and for what end that concerns me most of all.

[@BlanBonco]

I cling to "materialism" or it's physical most of the time because the folk psychology around nurture is usually the most toxic to us and our families... add religion into the mix and I'm half willing to let the ghost of the crazy neuroscientist Delgado play with my brain 😂

[@noemisarah98]

This show captures mental illness so well! Not going into too many details as to trigger someone but enough to show they understand what they are depicting (including little clues from the very beginning like Charlie always being cold). As someone who suffered from an ED and OCD and used to self-harm watching this show brings up so many memories without being triggering for me. Even Charlie's personality, his way of thinking and his posture (how he sits in the art room for example) remind me of my younger self. As someone who is straight, I never expected to be represented in Alice's work but I'm glad that I am, because, like with everything else, they've outdone themselves.

[@xtrff2024]

I’m aro ace and it’s so gooooood to see this non judgmental, kind and human representation. And good for him telling others to google info. It’s exhausting to be constantly having to educate people who (sometimes) simply cannot believe this is a thing and not trauma. ❤❤

[@alexandraRatliff]

I’ve been waiting for your reactions to this! I hope Dr. Jonathan decker (mended light/cinema therapy) does some reactions to season 3 too. I love seeing therapists review this show

[@patiencekillz]

i need jonathan to react to this season so badly!

[@rubysmolen5155]

i've ben waiting for Jonathan's as well (as well as Eliots)

[@lollydolly4590]

As someone who’s still dealing with the effects of having had an ED in my teens, this was a tough watch at some points this season I had to skip forward ten seconds sometimes, but overall I think it was very well done. I do think they could have done with having a screen at the beginning of the episodes giving a warning about what we were gonna get into for ppl who maybe hadn’t seen season two in a while and had forgotten or maybe didn’t expect the depth it was going to go into

[@squeek1717]

I think Charlies mental health storyline was realistic and was broached with sensitivity and care. I grew up in a family that could be classified as Christo-fascist. I was subjected to homophobia,xenophobia, and rascisim at a young age. I was not taught what gay was, or that gay people existed. Kids in school figured out that I was gay before I did. I had to deal with homohobia and abuse at school and also at home. I didnt have a safe space until I got emancipated at 16 and was able to choose a guardian that could give me a safe environment. I was diagnosed with anorexia nevosa, ptsd, depression and anxiety. There are alot of charlies in the lgbt community. Once i got out the toxic environment, I was lucky to be cared for by amazing psychologists and doctors. I met people in my own community that made me feel wanted and helped me find value in myself.

[@auldthymer]

I'm so glad.

[@squeek1717]

​@@auldthymerThank you. I try to help out others in the lgbt community that are going through struggles. It's my way of thanking the ones who helped me.

[@archiecraven6086]

@@squeek1717I’m glad you were able to land on your feet and realize that YOU weren’t the problem. I hope you are thriving and having a better life than your detractors have, because you deserve it. We need to normalize NOT being cruel to queer youth, and karma’s a bitch. I gather you are here in the US, and you probably fear for our future since it’s quite clear many voters consider us collateral damage. I guess we just keep fighting.

[@squeek1717]

​@archiecraven6086 Thank you for the kind words. I had a rough few years after I got emancipated. But I got stronger. Eventually, I got strong enough to fight for others. I marched in pride parades and became a social activist as well.

[@naomiavery1906]

The whole of seasons 3 made me sob and watching you react to it has done the same, heartstopper is such an important programme coz it's able to highlight some very big issues with such tenderness and care and optimism

[@nicolettemaloy]

I’m actually starting therapy for my OCD this Wednesday, and while my intrusive thoughts/obsessions and compulsions are very different from Charlie and I don’t have an ed. I still think the show represents it very well. If you haven’t watched it already I highly recommend the movie (and book) turtles all the way down it’s about ocd (written by John Green who also has ocd) it’s absolutely amazing.

[@neonjaystones1992]

Charlie's mental health story has inspired me to finally seek help for what I strongly believe is ocd. I was diagnosed with an ed in my first year of uni, stress always seems to bring out and worsen the ed. Although I'm a psychology graduate, one thing we never learned about is ocd. I decided after hearing Charlie's story to research a little more into it, and plan to bring it up at my next therapy session. This is definitely an important storyline to explore and I believe that it will help so many people like myself who are struggling

[@alicenightray5901]

Ahh back to my favorite blanket show 🧡 I never had it as bad as Charlie (read the comic), but I think it is very accurate and the drawn animations always help visualize the feelings that come with it. I’m glad shows like this one exist, so we can all learn from it and watch good examples

[@tomkoln7318]

Thanks for observing with such a kind heart. It's always good to come back to your channel!

[@abbyortiz132]

As someone who had struggled with an ED when I was 15&16, I think they did a great job in depicting it and showing representation. It may seemed rush but the series only had 8 episodes so it’s understandable. I may be recovered for 7 years now but seeing Charlie’s story did destroy me. Especially with Charlie being 15/16 as well, I saw myself in him. It brought back so many memories, wanting to hug my 15/16 year old self again, wanting to hug Charlie. I still love the fact they are shedding light on how men and boys can have EDs. How Nick brought it up was the most gentle and empathetic way he could of done, especially Charlie reacting calmly and not yelling at him. Understandable that Charlie is in denial about it, but he’s just needs time. There are times when people need time to realize they are struggling, and some people don’t want to realize that. However, they are still human. Struggling with an ED is not easy. There’s good days and bad days, it’s not always linear. I think this season presented that in such a accurate manner 💗.

[@rubysmolen5155]

when Charlie wouldn't take off his shirt off to go in the water I immediately went "because he has body dysmorphia!" they did a great job this season depicting what it is like to love someone with mental health disorders as well as what its like to live with them! Aspects of this season hit really close to home as someone who does have mental health disorders ( mine are different then charlies)

[@plankton2878]

i think also because he didn’t want nick to see his scars

[@rubysmolen5155]

@@plankton2878 yeah that too!

[@tallactordude]

I don’t have any kind of eating disorder, but I was diagnosed with OCD by my therapist a few years ago, and I can easily see some commonalities between my experience of it and Charlie’s, especially the creation of rules I need to obey (though most of them are unrelated to food). I already related to Charlie and a number of ways, and that gave me yet another way to relate, even though I am several times older than Charlie is.

[@Bilbilaul]

Is there any medical advice on where to find a boyfriend like Nick Nelson?

[@davewxc]

I think you somehow have to combine a rugby player with a golden retriever.

[@archiecraven6086]

I’m 52 and want to know if one comes in my age range. Or if there are Dr. Elliotts who aren’t an ocean away. 😂 [sighs in terminally single]

[@abigailsaunders5759]

I only have OCD, but I have met many people in treatment with both OCD and Anorexia. I loved the representation it gave of the fact that the two (EDs and OCD) are very often comorbid. I've personally never seen anything portray that so well.

[@sarahemf]

From my experience they get how family can act weird after finding out, and monitor everything right. There is a tone of shame around these things. Then everyone looking at you only extends the vulnerable and expands the internal criticism to be external. It’s easy to understand why people just become more secretive around it. And I don’t think they showed that well. Or that relapse into these behaviour is very easy when stressed.

[@heatherbc7914]

I'm not someone who normally cries at tv shows or films, but i cry at Every. Single. Episode. of Heartstopper. It's cathartic in a way I never knew I needed

[@stephlang3073]

I’m so excited to see your reactions to this season! Especially episode 4.

[@tcduong1138]

I am dying to see his reaction to the end of the next episode.

[@KrisHe1]

This season was painful in a beautiful way. So many strong topics, but in a way that gave a real insight while also having the warmth that the show has had all along. Loved it though not that prepared to sit full on bawling while working nights 😅 (kinda ironic crying my eyes out while on the job in a communal MH&substance abuse living facility😂) can't wait to see your reaction to the rest of the season, truly heartwrenching and heartwarming 🙈

[@XOXheartErin]

As an AroAce girlie, Isaac's entire storyline made me sob. Everything he said about having to evaluate everything you thought you knew about yourself and your future, as well as feeling like an outsider in your friend group, and even the LGBTQIA+ community, because romance and sex are the norm and what's expected is just so true and still to this day, a decade after giving myself the Ace label for the first time, I'm still feel that loneliness of being an outsider in my own community. 🧡💛🤍🩵💙

[@squeek1717]

You are part of the lgbtqia and you are loved. As a homoromantic asexual, I have to explain that someone can still be gay and ace. It can be exhausting.

[@EmonEconomist]

​@@squeek1717100%. As a cis hetero(demi?)romantic asexual person I constantly feel like I have to defend the place of cishet queer people like myself in the LGBTIQA+ community, because a lot of people still just aren't aware that straight-bi-gay and cis-nonbinary-trans are not the only two axes of sexuality and gender (and even that is an overly simplified view)! So it's nice to see characters like Isaac who I can point to as an example - maybe his story will help more people understand what asexuality and aromanticism are.

[@LHK26]

Aro-Ace and I feel this too. I was happy to find a name but then the realisation that I would always be outside.

[@Thoronris]

When I was an inpatient in a psychiatric hospital in 2018, I got the diagnosis of eating disorder - and I hated it. Ever since I was in school, people suspected it and brought it up (teachers and friends, never family), and I always blocked it. I knew I had severe mental health issues, but I didn't want to hear eating disorder - among other things because I knew very well I was too thin and I hated being so thin. I thought it didn't fit. I was so angry at the staff that they just put this diagnosis on me (I could live with the personality disorder one, that sounded appropriately grave and special and rare), but I hated the eating disorder. I hated that a big part of my treatment was centered around that. It was only when I realised what function my eating disorder fulfilled in my coping mechanisms that I was able to accept it and work on it. And it took over 5 years for me to get to a BMI that wasn't considered underweight anymore despite me accepting the eating disorder. I'll struggle with it for the rest of my life - I understand it's a form of addiction and a form of self harm. But I got better and have many days where I don't even think about food in a negative or obsessive way at all. The end of ep 2 wrecked me more than any other episode. It was so very close to my own experience that I relived the darkest times of my ED. So very well done, despite me feeling the triggering effects. I loved it.

[@DerekScottAbdn]

As a 48 year old, I agree that I wish something like this had been around when I was younger. All the shame, hiding and thinking we were alone might have not been as bad. I also connect with the idea of a first boyfriend having serious mental health issues and feeling as if I had to help them no matter what. My first boyfriend was a high-functioning alcoholic with anxiety, body dysmorphia and an eating disorder. He was from a rich family whereas mine were lower middle class. Was like navigating a minefield when his temper was bad, but he was really charming and loving most of the time. Took a lot to realise that you can’t always fix someone and you also have to protect yourself. Was always terrified to let go of the relationship as I used to think no one else would want me and I had gotten so lucky with him in the first place. I had had a lot of scars after IBD surgery and that made me terrified to give up what I thought was an ‘accepting’ relationship. This series is so good at helping people value themselves, identifying that boundaries are so important, and that we can’t always deal things on our own. I suspect I also have a bit of envy that young queer people can maybe have more chance of a positive,accepted ‘fairytale’ romance these days than many of us were able to.

[@lacynut]

By the way, talking about generational differences and wishing there was something like this when they were a teenager, I'm a tail-end baby boomer, so imagine how long I've been waiting for this!

[@xar226]

I've been looking forward to your reactions to this series. Ironically, I actually watched your reactions for both season 1 and season 2 before I watched the seasons themselves, so this is the first time I'm actually ahead. I don't have any experience with eating disorders, but I've definitely seen bits and parts of myself in almost all of the characters through the first two seasons, sometimes in terms of lived experience, sometimes in terms of mental state, and sometimes in a sense of wistfulness at wanting the kind of relationships (friendships and romantic) that these characters have. The show largely is joyous and has so many moments that make me smile, but there's also a sense of melancholy to watching it that I suppose is a testament to just how well it really does at relating these experiences.

[@sudeshsingh4067]

This season was a roller-coaster. The acting, especially Joe's was so spot on.

[@limolnar]

People don't talk enough about mens' mental health. The epidemic of multiple challenges for men -- who comprise the minority of the population -- has created NEETs and profoundly affected all areas of the economy and society. This is part of why I focus on men's health. Thank you for discussing this!!

[@normaladjacent]

Loved your analysis, and your acknowledgment of just how brave both Nick and Charlie are being here. Really looking forward to the rest of your reactions! Charlie is definitely struggling with body insecurities, but I don’t think they interact with his disordered eating in quite the way people might expect, which will be unpacked as the season goes on. 👀 Nick is the comic is not muscular like Kit Connor, he has a pretty typical teenage body with some softness around the middle. I think some of these scenes come across a little differently with an actor who clearly hits the gym hard and has an unusually toned physique for a 16 year old.

[@rosiejl2798]

When I was actively in my eating disorder someone saying they thought I was too thin or was anorexic only encouraged my eating disorder as it gave me a feeling of "winning". I think instead of focusing on a specific diagnosis or appearance (even tho it is scary to see someone who is emaciated) it is more important to talk to someone in terms of harmful behaviours such as disordered eating and how they are using that as a harmful coping mechanism to cope with distress/trauma etc. Like if you see someone who is overweight suddenly start extreme dieting/extreme exercising without expert medical supervision that should be a red flag to check in just as much as if you see it in someone who is underweight doing the same.

[@sarasolomon4812]

I love your reaction videos to Heartstopper! I am especially looking forward to seeing your insights on this season, since s3 has so much content about mental health. I remember reading an article about “13 Reasons Why”. Apparently the makers spoke to mental health professionals, who gave solid advice: Don't glamorize suicidal as revenge. Don’t graphically show abuse or r@pe, don’t graphically show suicide. Etc, etc. the show runners took all this advice… and did exactly the opposite. Because glamorization makes “good” TV, and that increases viewership. Heartstopper has done the impossible. It has created a compelling storyline while maintaining sensitivity and awareness. People struggling with their mental health can watch this show and truly feel hopeful. It gives an honest portrayal of mental illness without glamorizing or vilification. We know self harm happens without actually seeing it, and at no point is Charlie’s struggles dramatized simply to make compelling television. This isn’t trauma-p0rn. Looking forward to your reactions on all of season 3!

[@patiencekillz]

SO excited to see ur reactions for this season!

[@DommyXMommy]

I love the way this show depicts Charlie goes through his symptoms of ocd. The animations remind me a lot of how bojack horseman depicts them.

[@brunacunha1681]

The timing!!! I discovered your channel last night and finished watching the Heartsopper reactions a couple hours ago. I was so upset that we didn’t have a season 3 reaction yet lol

[@eyeseajujubee]

Definitely a comfort show for millennials, or at least for me. This show demonstrates the support I wish I’d had in high school (but I have BED). I deflected and pushed away people when they noticed I was struggling. I related to Charlie’s experience of body dysmorphia. It’s a complicated and isolating experience.

[@percysowner]

This is great timing for me. I wasn't able to get to Heartstopper until today and here is you first reaction. I loved your earlier videos on the previous seasons.

[@jpwphoenix1701]

There was so much about this season which I related to, especially with regards mental health, body image and depression. This first episode alone, Charlie was very much like me in not wanting to take his shirt off at the beach. However, unlike Charlie, I was more the other way in that I’ve always had trouble with being overweight (and being endlessly bullied for it throughout school). It was even worse once I became a teen, as I also then had to deal with body hair and spots all over the place. Even to this day, I’m having to deal with that same negative body image problem.

[@salemoh9759]

This season was hard for me, i had Bulimia nervosa but i had like charlie a good therapiest and doctor and family

[@generichuman2044]

When I saw the direction this series takes, I was immediately checking your channel for the reactions. Think you'll find a lot of good representation and talking points in this

[@TDM1165]

Was waiting for this! Enjoy ❤

[@danieloneal7137]

I’ve been looking forward to hearing your thoughts on this new season. It’s so emotional, and so well done.

[@the_nikster1]

see a lot of people get as anxious as Charlie when Nick doesn't say "I love you" right away (myself included!), but it took me a couple of watches to realize something: Nick is, at that very moment, processing a lot. he's just realized that while he was trying to talk to Charlie about that very serious topic, Charlie was trying to say "I love you" for the first time. not only that, but he wasn't expecting to hear it while he was in the shower through the bathroom door. he just needed some time to jumpstart his brain! lol I am so excited for your reactions to the rest of this season; it's SO GOOD. 🥰🏳‍🌈

[@Emma-LynnDavis]

Yay Get ready to cry😢😭

[@morganwebb5244]

Great to see your insight! Joe does such a wonderful job and it feels so authentic

[@juliaschmidt8341]

I would love to see your reaction to some later episodes of the season. Especially episode 4 where they really go through the whole process of struggling with mental health. I think they do it in such a heartbreaking, yet really important and informative way.

[@nihidea]

Good to see these reactions back! I haven't actually had time to watch the third season yet, but I've been following the comic and Charlie's storyline about his ED always struck a chord with me, as someone who.. definitely has some issues with food. I still haven't really figured out if it's an ED or just a symptom/side-effect of other health problems, and haven't had the courage to talk about it with a mental health professional yet. I can definitely relate to that anxiety over being called out, the immediate instinct to deny and downplay (even when a part of you has been thinking "why does no one notice i've been struggling" all along)

[@triangleoflife01]

i just binged all your heartstopper videos up until this one and i appeciate x1000 that youre doing this. i loved this show before but youre giving me so much insight into why. i am learning so much from you that is helpful for me. thanks 🙏🙏🙏

[@naomiavery1906]

I was so hoping you'd react to this season yayyyyy

[@evamoulard3925]

09:00 I can't totally compare either, but my autism is also a tricky subject for me to talk about, because you have to explain everything every time, and people dramatize too easily when they're told they have a disability.

[@mindya5288]

Wonderful reaction, I've been so looking forward to your commentary in this season in particular. Thank you ❤

[@spencersaturn]

It was a really good representation of EDs and OCD imo! I've got osfed (remix of bulimia/anorexia/BED ☠️) and ocd and I loved so much how it showed the realness but with a optimistic vibe. Has been so healing for me to watch this show as a transguy who came out at 12 (23 now) and wasn't accepted and then plus having lots of mh diagnosis (DID, aspd, bpd, asd, osfed, ocd, c-ptsd) and struggling to simply ✨exist✨, a show like this would have been so helpful and I'm really excited that I get to see that now 🥰

[@SharonVinyard]

I have an ED and some scenes where very hard to watch. It is incredible how good they represented it in the series. Too bad I didn't have a good therapist when I was a teen. It feels like fighting it as an adult is way harder. Seeing Charlie thinkgin about the worst possible outcome of several situations felt so familiar!

[@clara.cipher]

So exited for your reactions! Seeing a professional talk about all the issues brought up by Heartstopper, while also being able to relate to it makes it even more interesting to me. It also feels weirdly validating to see queer people talk about queer shows, makes me feel less alone with my own queerness.

[@genadiaz1988]

Been waiting for your reaction to this season especially ❤ Thank you again for another insightful and intelligent breakdown.

[@patrickkyteler5585]

I have seen season 3 twice now and should win a lot of awards. Joe Lock's acting in particular is incredible. THIS is the season tailor made for a gay clinical psychiatrist. Enjoy

[@booluther]

So looking forward to your reaction to this season

[@kenttucson2830]

I love this perspective. Been watching other "reaction" videos. I've subscribed from Tucson AZ. Will be following you. Thanks.

[@Callimachus33]

Remember that Charlie also has scars on his body from his self harm. That also contributes to his fear of taking off his shirt.

[@normaladjacent]

This hasn’t been addressed yet in the TV show though.

[@Callimachus33]

@@normaladjacent His self harm? It was addressed in the last episode of series 2

[@normaladjacent]

@@Callimachus33 Yes, but there’s been no discussion of any scarring or where it might be located.

[@Callimachus33]

@@normaladjacent You may not know this, but with the type of self harm we are discussing, it is exceedingly rare for there *not* to be any scars.

[@normaladjacent]

@@Callimachus33 Right, I just meant that someone who has not read the comic would not know where Charlie’s scars are located and immediately make that connection.

[@lorettacrooms4398]

I been on pins and needles waiting for your review. TY for your insight. I know you are busy.?...but it felt like forever waiting for you. 😂

[@archiecraven6086]

I experienced this through my ex-husband, and I could very much relate. He was severely bulimic as a result of trauma and was in and out of treatment throughout our relationship. There were additional factors as well (alcohol, his treatment of me) that eventually ended our marriage. He is now a therapist and hopefully doing well.

[@candiceo8028]

SO glad to have this Heartstopper reaction!!🎉

[@buddytheoc]

THANK YOU I WAITED FOR THIS TO HAPPEN

[@blakearteman]

I cant speak for annorexia, but im pretty sure i am someone who is sort of opposite where i am very overweight and has binged eaten alot. I feel so uncomfortable taking my shirt off at pools and things and i too dont like having my photo taken. Its like everytime i see myself in those I feel as though my appearance is wrong and not really what i am supposed to be. Ive been diagnosed with anxiety and depression and for the most part those are fairly well under control but i am pretty sure my weight and sometimes binge eating, mainly when my depression is so bad that eating food is something that I enjoy. Even though Charlie and I are different, ive found so many things from this show. In the first season, he spoke of thinking maybe people would be better off if he didnt exist. Ive felt that on a few occasions. I dont now. But when he said it, its like i woke up and remembered i had and decided to take some time to address it. The more they explore his mental illnesses, it hits hard but i find it so nice to have a show like this really go into it. Its not a common thing to see.

[@heartstopperdeepdives]

YESSS I love your insights and your videos for this season will be especially good given the subject matter, I'm sure.

[@edabillano106]

I enjoyed your reaction to this episode and learned a lot. Can't wait to see & hear your reaction to the next one. Thanks.

[@wannabewillow]

Yeay!!!! I was looking forward to this so much!!!!

[@MP-1218]

Loved watching you analyze everything. I really want to get into psychology.

[@stephenmcglone3878]

I can't wait to see your reaction to episode 4

[@bernieadin1567]

Thanks so much for your review.

[@SilentSong123]

I adore Issac and Charlie' relationship

[@jealousofmypuddin]

Fellow millennial here, and can confirm, love this show and the friend group. A much healthier overall manner of addressing a myriad of issues. Pardon me if I live vicariously through these characters while I binge the episodes. lol

[@berf9445]

So I recently relapsed for the second time with anorexia(so 3 instances) and lost 70lbs but because I’ve been on antipsychotics for years I was a bit overweight and all I got were complements even though it was over 4 months and my family knew I wasn’t eating. My psychiatrist I think was uncomfortable and not trained in it. He prescribed an ssri I never took out of fear of gaining. I did start eating again like a month ago because I was so close to underweight people were noticing, and I hate it because I have been ravenous. But it’s not over or done. Starting up restriction again is constantly on my mind and seeing myself in the mirror all I can think is how disgusting I’ve gotten from eating and how my clothes probably won’t fit. I can’t look at my body without feeling like I’ve gained 100lbs and everyone can see. :/ anyway. Not eating again is the goal. It’s harder I think than people might realize though. Usually a step down process.. Edit: As far as relating to Heartstopper, I feel like it's so innocent, and I am not. Maybe I was the first time, but this is my third go at it. I know what I am doing. He doesn't really. I know I am hurting myself, and going to hurt people around me. I'm being selfish and bad. He is just dealing with emotions. I'm using all my tricks. I know I should stop, but I don't. Edit 2: Also on top of it I have gender dysphoria, which I didn't realize the first 2 times, but looking back can recognize.

[@elisabethbauman6190]

Relying on coping mechanisms for serious mental pain and distorted thinking isn’t selfish. It may be harmful to yourself and your relationships, but you do it because of real, acute problems. You need help, support, and empathy, not blame and shame. It’s hard, and you deserve credit for combatting something that is hard, even when you’re not winning the fight. I used to self-harm, and I don’t anymore, but the urge to do it never really went away, especially when I get stressed or depressed or out of control. I always worry that I might have a relapse, even 20 years on, and on-going therapy and a focus on stress-reduction have been crucial. Recognizing that you’re hurting yourself and others is noble and potentially helpful. Thinking that makes you selfish and bad isn’t. I wish you the best of luck in your ongoing journey, and know the fact that you’re still here at all is evidence of your strength.

[@ethangilbert767]

I am glad Mr al Gore ithm popped this video up in my feed. I don't have an ED per se, though my relationship with food is disordered. That's just an aspect of a more global problem I have with, well, pretty much everything. I really honed in on your description of catastrophizing in this video in particular. It's difficult to describe, but that sort of self sabotage is painfully familiar. When you have a dysfunctional executive center in your brain, you find yourself repeatedly mystified by your own thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. I'm not sure where I'm going with this -- I need to think on it more. Great content.

[@bac2052]

Interesting reflecting on minority stress, as watching this season, in moments where queer characters were showing affection in public I definitely felt stress of ‘is someone going to come up and harass/abuse them’, and especially for elle later in the season, i definitely was dreading that interview and was not surprised at all at where it went and just felt sadly accepting (learned helplessness?) with it. Finally watched the season and so glad i can now watch your coverage. I did like how they handled how to support someone with an ed (both with some disordered thinking around food myself and having dated someone when i was younger with an ed and trying to help but not doing it well for me or them) and emphasis on wider support systems and caring for yourself too, a lot of great messages and nuance this season

[@ray-yc1dd]

Yess I've been waiting for this!

[@floppsymoppsy5969]

My biggest takeaway is that I could never walk away from a good basket of fish and chips

[@cosplaymistake]

Later in the Comic he does have a confirmed eating disorder and he ends up going to a psych ward, I ended up having to stop reading the comic cause inpatient wards can be very triggering for me personally

[@winter89_colours]

I am a muddy Pansexual - my hubby is cis straight male. I was watching this season and he decided to watch with me - and he related so hard to charlie that he cried and confessed that his own eating disorder had been flaring up again lately. Like charlie - his is not centered around loosing weight but more of stress and control related.

[@PowerDiva]

This season people really noticed Kit Connor's acting abilities... and he was great. But I don't think Joe Locke gets enough credit for the nuances of his performance. When they are both in the sea, watch Charlie's face as he tunes out while Nick is talking. Then his body language as he nervously clasps his hands together, while smiling and putting up the front that everything is fine. But the smile is noticeably forced and isn't quite convincing. He also takes a step back from Nick, putting some distance in between them. It's these tiny details in his performance that make this scene so tough to watch, because we all know that Charlie is in pain and paralyzed with fear that Nick has figured out his secret in this moment. Joe Locke did so well portraying this to us on screen.

[@Caoimhe10]

I feel like your videos haven't been showing in my subscription box for ages. I thought you'd took a break

[@DoctorElliottCarthy]

Not so much a break as more of other bits of life getting in the way for the past few weeks

[@test-kf2zv]

I have anxiety, which means there are commonalities with OCD like intrusive thoughts. I think the show portrays mental health very well.

[@sfmmmo7599]

Omg!! Yayy! I needed ur videos 🫶

[@spiritually-awake-metalhead]

I'm a gay millenial also I totally agree with what you said in the beginning. I struggled with BPD and therefore also with an ED and SH and alcoholism. This season kind of broke me. It just reminded me of my past struggles but at the same time how far I have come when it comes to getting better / healing from past trauma and struggles. It was not easy but and sometimes it is still hard but I'm also a lot better.

[@lillykawaiifox]

Yeah, I relate to Charlie thinking the worse case scenario will happen. I'm working on it and trying to stop doing that. But sometimes anxiety makes me go back to it. 😬

[@emrem6354]

I've only watched the first two episodes. But as someone who has suffered from severe OCD (at my worse I spent 2-3 hours a day checking absolutely everything) and is likely asexual, it does ring true in some ways. I need to get farther into the season, but I hope they convey how it feels to be asexual and know the vast majority of people just don't get it. I truly think people have a far easier time wrapping their heads around someone being sexually interested in someone else regardless of gender identity. But the idea of just not having sexual attraction at all seems to flummox people, and they can oftentimes make me feel like I'm defective. And as someone who's likely asexual, I DO wish there were a medical explanation. That would make me feel like it's not somehow a fault in me as a person. I understand the slippery slope angle, but I personally would feel less broken, either because it's "untreatable" or because it IS treatable and I could actually have that experience that seems so important to 99%+ of the population.

[@elliyo4286]

I hope they will delve into Tori´s asexuality. There is so, so little ace representation; ace-spec romance is something that would mean so much to me. But I love this show!! And so thankful for Isaac.

[@Tattersayl]

I'm struggling immensely with atypical anorexia nervosa, I don't have the attention span to watch shows anymore but do "watch" them through your breakdowns.... What I've seen from Charlie has been so relatable. I'm terrified of the future and am facing inpatient treatment very soon but I do hold hope that one day it won't have the grip on my throat that ED currently does.

[@patiencekillz]

sending you good vibes. ur gonna make it thru this!!

[@doryinsanime6862]

I love your reaction my favorite show ever,very important to me,I’m happy and I definitely need show when I was teenager as well.I’m happy with life.

[@paesitopaez4302]

As someone from the LGBT community, I think that if someone you care about is actually interested in understanding your identity, your experience, then why not atleast try and explain it to them, share it with them. It's easy to forget but not everyone has knowledge of the terminology that we use. Even I get lost with the new terms being used now and then, and I am bi sociologist for God's sake.

[@katyy102]

Omggg yes!!! Your reaction videos were the second thing I was most excited about after this season's release. This show has phenomenal representation. It helped me understand my queerness. I wish I had this as a teenager❤️

[@bdownz8491]

love the video! prepare for a ROLLER COASTER ❤

[@imaginareality]

I've shown signs / behaviours of an eating disorder during my college years but I was able to overcome it by mself so now I don't know what to call it? could it have been an ED if I didn't need treatment to get better? It was a really scary experience sometimes. Like I was so scared of what I was doing to my body and at the same time, I didn't want to stop. (edit: or couldn't stop, I guess)

[@Rynicus]

as an aro-ace it is unbelievably exhausting explaining it to people over and over and over again for them to still not grasp the concept 😬

[@billythe11thdimensionalhobo]

Warning: The following was written by someone who was given a Chemical Lobotomy I was just backstabbed by Vcause 2, Kevin Leiber, via his Discord Server. The Create Unkown.

[@lacynut]

Please don't leave too much time between your posts about season three, or otherwise I might experience too much anticipatory anxiety! 🙂

[@Luverofmysoul2]

I've related so hard to this show. I'm 34 and I've dealt with my multi diagnostic ED for almost 20 years now. I only just was treated for it this year and still struggle. I currently see a dietitian and ED therapist. I also currently really struggle with the body image issues of the queer community. It's really hard and scary. I wonder if you could cover the body shaming in the queer community some time. I'd love to hear about it from a queer doctor of psychology.

[@andre_p]

Although the season revolves around Charlie’s condition and Nick’s response, a lot of important issues are tackled, not in a didactic/pedantic way, but with openness. The show is non-judgmental and empathetic to a degree never reached before.

[@deoradh]

Your comments about being the butt of everyone’s entertainment are apt, but I’d say you didn’t delve far enough back, generationally. True, millennials lacked the support seen here (itself still lacking in several obvious respects), but they caught the ride on a long, slow upswing in the entertainment industry. Early 90s in college, the summer after I came out to my (accepting - I lucked out with my relations) mother, her well-intentioned self watched Philadelphia, and said she always thought of me when she watched it. Great movie, but how horrible a sentiment. I’d rather have had her watching The Sum of Us (especially if I had Russell Crowe’s looks, but that ship sailed) or Tales of the City (normalized and fun). The alternatives were movies like Torch Song Trilogy (gay man gets murdered), Jeffrey (fear of HIV/AIDS, and gay man dies), Philadelphia (HIV/AIDS, job discrimination), To Wong Foo (camp), Priscilla (“AIDS fuckers go home”)… great movies in themselves, but playing to stereotyped lols or throwing the horrors in our faces. Anything before then and we’re scraping at the rare art house film (Querelle), or strictly for camp (The Ritz, any gay character on TV - Mr Humphries in Are You Being Served? comes to mind). Sure we had a couple feel-goods (cf The Sum of Us, Tales of the City), but those aren’t the ones people generally remember. You’re lucky to find some of them. For the record, I loved all of the shows I mentioned. But HS gives us that fantasy life we could rarely risk.

[@GirliestMammy]

💖