Does A Mother-Enmeshed Man Hate His Mother?

Рет қаралды 2,837

3 жыл бұрын

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Пікірлер: 30

@oliverjrcooper 4 ай бұрын

Mother-Enmeshed Man - How To No Longer Be A Mother-Enmeshed Man - www.amazon.com/gp/product/B09P4R7SBN/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vamf_tkin_p1_i9

@robinantonio8870 3 ай бұрын

Absolutely. My ex and his brother have a mother who is narcissistic and extremely controlling, they will never stand up to her, but hate all women and seek to control, blame and abuse their partners . Then when their partners leave them, " all women are b -----s".

@SigmaFeminine Ай бұрын

my ex was enmeshed and behind the closed doors of our home he very openly hated her while taking it all out on me. So they don’t always idealize their mother or see her as great, but they are trapped and will lash out just not at her.

@lisastillion2937 10 күн бұрын

They learn to treat women as NOTHING, and are abusive. VERY SICK DYNAMIC AND BEHAVIOR.

@Tom-ps2cq 4 ай бұрын

Men also treat their partners how they’ve witnessed their Fathers treat their Mothers.

@joanofarc1470 3 жыл бұрын

I think some hate their mothers and sisters and then their partner.

@user-zz5te5nw7g Ай бұрын

Bro...

@joanofarc1470 3 жыл бұрын

Yes I think he does and he can also hate women deep down

@lisastillion2937 18 күн бұрын

I have seen physical petting, speech in semi-lover tones, and excessive jealousy from an enmeshed mother/son. No one else matters, excessive spending, providing homes, clothing, vehicles, presents and ignoring the daughters. Its very sick, sickening to watch and know that both are so embedded that a spouse and children are nothing...only the enmeshed son. The son gets so much materialistic gain, and will attack women, curse them, abuse them and destroy them at the urging and flying monkey ganging up on sons gf or spouses. A horrible way to live, damaging so many ppl.

@MadonnaGrogan Күн бұрын

Have seen this too, creepy

@VengefulPolititron 3 жыл бұрын

so my dad hates his mom. doesn't know it. never was given attention properly by his dad... so he is crappy to my mom. my mom needs me to be the husband support. I hate her. figured it out a bit. but wouldn't accept it.

@chadharr3733 2 жыл бұрын

I have deep deep rage and half my personality is pure love and comppasion while the other part is deep hatred and resentment towards everyone who I ever made a connection w in my life and it’s tearing me apart and I want to know how I can integrate that deep aggression and rage

@inthesky7836 Ай бұрын

How are you holding up these days? The game of duality can be difficult to navigate and integrate but not impossible ;)

@MissSarahGM 2 жыл бұрын

That was very well explained, thank you. The enmeshment trauma is triggered by the relationship with a woman, and it feels safer to attribute their discomfort to the woman, rather than to their real initial perpetrator, the mother. If they could start to feel their anger towards their mother, it could be the start of a change. My ex boyfriend said his mother was quite controlling, but he was a difficult kid.. and I realised how he confides in her and asks for relationship advice from her.. But he doesn't connect the dots... He ended the relationship, because he felt "annoyed" by me and the closeness, and wanted to be alone. Despite all the mixed signals that he loved me. Do you think some enmeshed men never wake up and believe they are not meant to be in relationship?

@oliverjrcooper 2 жыл бұрын

Hello Sarah M, thank you for your feedback. As for it feeling safer to attribute it to the woman, this can be the case. However, as the early experiences are likely to have been repressed and forgotten about by their conscious mind, it can literally seem as though the woman is the cause. Ultimately, this is largely what happens in relationships as a whole. Two people are drawn together for conscious and unconscious reasons and what hasn't been resolved from way back is unlocked. But, of course, in order for these wounds to be resolved and the relationship to not only last but thrive, there has to be an understanding of this and a willingness to work through old issues. It sounds accurate that not every man in this position will 'wake up' or have the desire to be in a relationship.

@MissSarahGM 2 жыл бұрын

Hello Oliver, thanks to your videos I see more clearly the mechanisms that sabotaged my relationship with this man. I understand why he was so ambivalent, loving and fearful of me, in a way that felt irrational. His mom seemed warm and helpful but I picked up on her intrusive and self-centered qualities. She has massive influence on my 39 yo ex, as his siblings have. To the point where he doesn't seem to have values of his own, it's a lot of narcissistic values (money, status, comparing to his siblings' success). I wonder how someone in this situation can start to see the forest for the trees, and realise the discomfort felt comes from his relationship to his mother? Especially as his family is perceived all positively by him and he's out of touch with his anger. It's obvious now that he projected his anger onto me instead of the initial perpetrator. At the time, he agreed he was too close to his family, when I suggested he was like a man child. Does it take a massive loss or break down to come out of the fog? I was touched by his inner boy and I wanted to love him like he deserves and maybe to rescue him. I come from a narcissistic family and it took me time to connect the dots..

@oliverjrcooper 2 жыл бұрын

Hello Sarah, "I wonder how someone in this situation can start to see the forest for the trees, and realise the discomfort felt comes from his relationship to his mother?" - Well, it can take something significant. As you say, he's in an environment where his behaviour is not only normal but supported, so he's in a closed system, so to speak. I would say that the most important thing here is that you can see why you were drawn to him. You can now use your energy to heal your wounds and, when you are ready, to be with a man who is right for you.

@MissSarahGM 2 жыл бұрын

Hello Oliver, Can I email you?

@oliverjrcooper 2 жыл бұрын

Hello Sarah, of course. You can contact me here - www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/contact.html

@BrianMurfitt 3 күн бұрын

You've got this in a nutshell. There are many young men who are mother enmeshed. I retaliated against my mother, so most of the anger is gone. But I still deeply resent her for interfering in my career choices when I was younger and I tend to distrust most women, even to this today. Particularly, older women who are usually the most manipulative and vindictive. Most enmeshed mother sons, are either permanent bachelors or gay, that's usually the result of this form of vulnerable narcissm! 🚺😱

@oliverjrcooper Күн бұрын

Hello @BrianMurfitt, thank you for your comment and for sharing your thoughts on this topic.

@BrianMurfitt Күн бұрын

@@oliverjrcooper You're welcome. Thanks I'll watch your other videos in due course. Looking forward to future content.