The Hidden Desires of INTPs: Unraveling Relationship Needs

[@ranarene5965]

As an infp, I love intp's; they are so loyal and inteligent and have a twisted sense of humor that we usually share. I feel really comfortable with their awkardness, I like share ideas and how we respect eachother spaces 😊

[@TheINTPProblem]

Those are wonderfully kind words! Thank you! Do you have any particular reason for looking into INTP content?

[@beckylo999]

INTJ here. I love the honesty of INTPs. My experience is that they are very reserved to share their thoughts out of fear of rejection or judgment. Takes time to crack them open but well worth the wait. Takeaway Formula: INTP Caring -> Truth Sharing

[@franziskabrand5964]

Looking here for other INTPs or INTJs, I've got hardly any in my life. Missing people who share the same logic based way of thinking so hard!

[@TheINTPProblem]

Thank you, Becky, for the lovely words!

[@myra3266]

I’m infp and I actually really like intp’s as I’ve grown up I’ve learned to not take things as personally but yes I love their intelligence and honesty really ❤️

[@TheINTPProblem]

I appreciate that and I'm sure every INTP that sees this comment appreciates that. Tough to be appreciate for what we bring to reality,. Grateful 🙏🏽 😎 🤘🏽 💜

[@jvanwoesik]

Thank you for taking the time to champion for INTPs.

[@TheINTPProblem]

It's my honor and pleasure! 😎 🤘🏽 💜

[@rose7777]

As an enfp, i really really appreciate intps and infjs. I cannot explain but it brings harmony in my space. Appreciate the video ❤

[@TheINTPProblem]

Thanks for sharing!

[@kimtopology4257]

Good advice as an INTP my husband is an ENFJ we have been married for 27 yrs and for me honesty is a principal I stand by the most in my marriage .

[@TheINTPProblem]

Absolutely vital to be able to be honest with each other! 💜

[@Ladywren101]

I've recently realized that I'm willing to be aggressively present and fight for the handful of humans I actually care about. However, when it comes to myself, I'm much more likely to accept the wrong done to me and continue on. Hmmm. Thanks for the video. I really like your guitars.

[@thefatcatsadventures]

Sapiosexual ENFJ here who’s only 54% extrovert. My romantic and relationship style is purely INFJ. My brother is an INTP and so is my current boyfriend. I think INTPs are awesome. They don’t get offended by dark humor and I love how you can get deep and intellectual conversations for hours. I find that very exciting! Gosh your mind is extremely beautiful! INTPs can be very chatty to the point that it drains me a when I’m multitasking. They can be very cuddly and tactile too. I love how my boyfriend would bring me out of my shell because I tend to suppress my emotions especially when overwhelmed. And I’m impressed because my BF is sensitive enough to notice subtle changes and know when to press for more information. Most people can’t do that. The point is, INTPs have great romantic and relationship potential. It’s just the matter of finding the right person to open up to.

[@Eddison33]

What you were saying in the beginning (and like the first third of the video) was very spot on and insightful! Later on, it could definitely use some more structure, especially when describing what INTPs can do about it and what people should better do to connect with them in a meaningful way. Still, I find those little moments of weird analogies, vocalizations, joking to yourself and laughing at it, etc. extremely relatable! I do this often too) Still, a little bit more structure is needed. Keep on doing a good work, man

[@lisalynch2930]

Great video. You hit the nail on the head with everything. Honesty has always been super important to me, but I realized that I’m the only one who thinks that way. I don’t understand why people get so upset with me and attack me when I tell them something I think they should know. I’m very nice about it and I try really hard not to offend. I can offend someone when my intention is to compliment them. My husband is good at pointing out what went wrong and why what I said could be construed as offensive. But it’s like you said, people don’t take the time to get to know me. So, I don’t say anything anymore.you are so right about if I can’t be ho eat then you take away my ability to care. I would love for people to be honest with me even if it hurts, but for some reason they are afraid of me. Just about every friend I’ve ever had abandoned me. I don’t know why. I find that I value them more then they value me. There’s one friend that I had that I felt I could be totally honest with and she never left me. Unfortunately I had to leave the friendship. She has bipolar and I realized that my honesty caused great hardship for her family because she would have a bad week which meant everyone else had a bad week. I live in a house full of people (I have 7 children) and I feel lonely sometimes. No one thinks like I do. I am misunderstood ALL THE TIME. It’s frustrating. Anyway, I really liked the video.

[@TheINTPProblem]

Thank you for such a great expression and comment! Yes, if I can't be honest then I can't continue to care is a tough reality of the INTP experience. Honestly is tough to navigate as someone who values in when others hide from it so much. Truth is, I see navigating life via principles and truth as a tougher life than others could bare. We get a unique perspective and have a unique challenge but it comes with unique gifts that can't just be freely given away to anyone. Much love! 💜 🙏🏽😎🙏🏽

[@lisalynch2930]

“I see navigating life via principles and truth as a tougher life than others could bare” So true!! I say that a lot. Most people can’t handle the truth like I can. The concept of friend is different for me than other people There’s only a select few that I’ve ever truly called friend, but when that happens I am loyal for life. It’s like an unbreakable bond forms. It sucks because people always let me down eventually. 😊

[@NothingIsWrongToday]

INTP here. Im literally coming out of a relationship where I overtime mentally checked out as I wasnt being heard. Even now after explaining to him all my reasons for breaking up and how I fell out of love. He didn't even listen? I dont know how to explain it. Even when I directly told him he never made me feel like I could express myself openly and without judgement he didn't understand. I constantly put others and their feelings before mine and it has brewed relationships where I am not heard or understood. I seek that symbiotic relationship where I can be open and so can my partner as it brews healthy communication. And I wasn't getting that on this one and I just kept shutting down mentally and I was in a very dark place for a long time. And like I said even now he does not understand me and It has made me feel like I wasted my breath and energy explaining. I know I am able to listen and try my hardest to understand a partner or a friend regardless of my emotions and I want to seek the same toward me on whatever future relationships I have.

[@TheINTPProblem]

I'm sorry about the relationship having been such a struggle. That's not fair to not be heard and moving on from those situations is an important boundary to keep. I hope you get opportunities for these situations to improve. Sending much love! 💜

[@rachellel]

I’m an Infj, hubby is Intp. It’s hard to get you guys out of your shell, but my personality seems to have made some progress!

[@TheINTPProblem]

Glad to hear it!

[@cinema2748]

Why do you think that you need to get him out of his shell??!! I am sure he is in his shell out of his own choice and he is happy there. Don't force too much. It might be burdensome for him or at least ask him - "Is it burdensome for you?"

[@jamescah9230]

3:20 -Truth! INTPs Tactfully and properly steal this and tell this to anyone you have and want to keep in your life. I repeat TACTFULLY and PROPERLY

[@winter.valentine]

great video!

[@WalkScripture]

ENFP dating an INTP. His mind is what initially attracted me. He is my favorite person to hold space for and hear his honest thoughts

[@TheINTPProblem]

Warms my heart! 🙏🏽💜

[@rose7777]

I gravitate towards infj and intp too. Even without knowing personality types, i only fell for infj and intp. Strange, i find it strange

[@susan_from_washington]

I'm an ENFP who is tentative about overwhelming an INTP by showing emotion.

[@rogerhuggettjr.7675]

My observations are that types make a big difference for relationships. We don't do well with Si hero types (ISFJ and ISTJ) because they are so set that there is a right way to do everything and they will see our Ne parent as immature when we think outside the box. I've had trouble with INFPs because our thinking can feel cold and their Ne parent feeding Fi hero reads feelings into our actions where we don't put them and can judge the hell out of us. The Se parent of ISFPs seem to be a great match in that they take your words at face value and with Ne trickster they really can't judge other's motives well. With no common functions there is always something to learn and we cover each other's blind spots well. Also, there are lots of them!

[@TheINTPProblem]

I wouldn't say it's so much about "which type" so much how can we better connect with all of the types and how?

[@lisalynch2930]

Hahaha! My husband is ISFJ. We are great together but the couple of things that drives me nuts are he rarely leaves me alone, he’s sensitive, he isn’t straight forward with me, he’s worried too much about my feelings. But we get along great and it works.

[@dxfifa]

The worst types for INTPs are Fi users who also have Si. So INFP, ISFJ. And those with Fe, Se as they're the ones who reject us and hold us down. I think ironically, the ESTP with Se, Ti, Fe, Ni is probably the biggest INTP invalidator. They are masters in controlling the group and almost as stubborn in their logic as us. Everything they value, we are a threat. We aren't present, we don't conform to the group, and we have different ideas to them about what makes sense

[@samuela6271]

Luckily i married a enfj. We are opposite in so many ways. Our stacks are perfect mirrors so its been very interesting. I was in a loop for some years after the baby, just feeling like the biggest robot. Wife and i were in a frozen place but, something came over me and we broke out. Maybe its midlife reassessment? But I'm feel validated, and loved. It took me opening up and not trying to be right. Also trying to bridge me extroverted feeling. I havey wife as a roll model and teacher. Wouldn't have been possible to do all this work alone.

[@TheINTPProblem]

That's amazing to hear! It seems like you were able to let go of control a bit and release into love. Amazing!

[@samuela6271]

@@TheINTPProblem it takes constant attention but its worth it!

[@yanamclaughlin]

INTPs are fascinating, and ones like you who have done growth work are like superheroes * Side note, after writing this I noticed the Superman shirt... How apropos ✓

[@TheINTPProblem]

That's very kind! Thank you! I aspire to wear the symbol proudly! 💜

[@carrsmith4727]

Thank you for creating this video.

[@TheINTPProblem]

You're welcome!

[@jamaica1765]

139 views. No comments. Great video

[@yandhy5207]

Great video. I love your insights and I hope one day to develop as much as you did. Thank you for the help.🙏

[@TheINTPProblem]

I appreciate that feedback! I'm sure you'll go great! 💜

[@jvanwoesik]

Thank you. Great video. I'm an intp. Good advise here.

[@TheINTPProblem]

Thanks for watching! 😎 🤘🏽 💜

[@bootlegapples]

Being an INTP can be very lonely, especially when you don't live up to your potential.

[@TheINTPProblem]

It totally can be. Thank you for sharing. Potential is discovered. If we have a predefined idea in our head about potential it's like starting from way behind the line and sometimes that goalpost keeps moving without us realizing it. It can be a way of beating ourselves up and not accepting who we are. Chip on the shoulder. Living at a deficit. Potential is also comparison to some ideal or imagination and comparison is the thief of joy. Start from here.

[@bootlegapples]

@@TheINTPProblem Thanks for the thoughtful reply:)I wish I had the self knowledge then that I have now.I passed on college to play music,to learn and do things my way.I got married to the wrong woman,had kids and got saddled with bills.At 55 and divorced I have found my tribe and feel less alone.Am currently pursuing another INTP,will see if I found my accepting INTP Chicklet queen.😎Either way I'm working on me,and know what I want,will forge lonely or not.Thx again

[@TheINTPProblem]

I'm so glad to hear things are on track! Good luck and keep me posted! 🙏🏽😎🤘🏽

[@PsyllyViews]

Intps need to know that they are meant to be alone and detach from the emotional world of the general society. Being dismissed is truly a second nature of intp. Intps need to know this first but intps needed the the experience to be dismissed and earn the trauma so intps learn more easier to detach themselves from society so that they can ready themselves to figure life by themselves alone (not forced reclusion but much needed reclusion for less distraction from all the hooplas in the world) intps need to be more patient... and able to adapt on their unforced failures. coz its a lesson people seldom learn from.

[@TheINTPProblem]

Yeah we need that isolation but not so much so that we lose access points to people and support systems or lose touch with reality.

[@PsyllyViews]

@@TheINTPProblem no need to be like a hermit.... being alone in your abode will suffice. Must have your own work space that wont keep you from being distracted. Well people can be very lonely in a crowd, isnt that right? So used that to your advantage

[@cinema2748]

​​​@@PsyllyViewsWhat about "family life"? Do you think normal "family life" Is for intp s ? Spouse, children - their daily emotional, physical needs - do you think an intp is equipped to deal with that ?? @TheINTPPropblem as well

[@PsyllyViews]

@@cinema2748 Dont get me wrong.... Not all intp are the same. intp assertive types dont hsve the problem like what the intp turbulent have. Intp-t are often the ones who have veru ironically have traumatic life and intp-a are the often are very successful in life and have a very goood job and often the ones who are married. intp-t relationship are often problematic they are very hard to be understood. Most of them dont even understood themselves, why life is hard for no obvious observable reason. If your are intp? you will know this.... So

[@PsyllyViews]

One can already be alone in a crowd.... np need to go to isolated places to have solitude. People will avoid uou anyway (for being too deep to rhe people around them who only wants to hear whats everyone are talking about)

[@ltyson6744]

Champion on! 😊

[@TheINTPProblem]

I will and I am! 😎 🤘🏼 💜

[@wf4983]

That was well explained. Be aware that there aŕe different kinds of truth. For example it felt never really true/ honest what my former boyfriend stated (intp) ... because for me it was as if he 'only' stated some premises of his (what appeared to me marginal back then). Instead I was always trying to get to know his world behind all this (in vain) - you can surely guess I am a fi-user 😅

[@cinema2748]

I am not sure why he was with you. ! I wouldn't be with anyone to whom I'll have to "explain " my inner workings all the times. That only means that we are not compatible. People can be great individually but they may not be compatible for each other, you see.

[@wf4983]

@@cinema2748 yes. You're right. You can't be sure why he was with me, you even don't have a clue. That is because you don't know me, you don't know our relationship, you don't know how I am as a person. For me, it's unimaginable to exclude or dismiss someone just because this person wants to know my truth.

[@eccentricmusings563]

Knit-picking, I know, but I found it funny that you typed Dr.Brennan (from Bones) as an INTP when she's an INTJ. If you want an INTP (5w6 specifically) example from that show, look at Zack Addy.

[@TheINTPProblem]

We're allowed to have differing opinions of a fictional character. Zack definitely fits the bill in a more typical way.

[@eccentricmusings563]

@@TheINTPProblem Oh of course that's completely fair. Character personality is more difficult to analyze than real people due to continuity errors and sometimes lack of development of said character. I can see how she can be read as INTP, I definitely think Ni is very present in her dominant slot and Fi tertiary begins to show when she very strongly asserts her values.

[@Gadget_2161]

11:00 😂i know I’m not helping, that’s why I’m here , I wish I could help.

[@TheINTPProblem]

The first step is knowing :D

[@medizzyie]

tnks.u helped me alot with my bf

[@TheINTPProblem]

You're welcome!

[@Gadget_2161]

5:10 what does holding space for others mean?

[@TheINTPProblem]

Listening and letting them complete their expression of thoughts and feelings. Not trying to fix their problems and letting them vent. Be present with them and asking questions, if needed.

[@andrejskafar7781]

Haven't got anyone.

[@TheINTPProblem]

For now.

[@hannarahmouni3213]

9.37 who says they want to throw introverted thinking in the garbage and ignore?

[@TheINTPProblem]

I forgot what I said 😂

[@hannarahmouni3213]

​@@TheINTPProblem Everybody can be clueless sometimes, ay! It was a mistake on your behave. It's okay.