How To Stop Feeling So Lost, Anxious, Stressed & Unhappy | Dr. Gabor Maté

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Doug Bopst

Doug Bopst

6 ай бұрын

Check out the full interview I did with Dr. Gabor Maté: • Dr. Gabor Maté On Why ...
⚠ WELLNESS DISCLAIMER ⚠
Please be advised; the topics related to mental health in my content are for informational, discussion, and entertainment purposes only. The content is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding your current condition. Never disregard professional advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard from your favorite creator, on social media, or shared within content you’ve consumed.
If you are in crisis or you think you may have an emergency, call your doctor or 911 immediately.
If you do not have a health professional who is able to assist you, use these resources to find help:
Emergency Medical Services-911
If the situation is potentially life-threatening, get immediate emergency assistance by calling 911, available 24 hours a day.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or suicidepreventionlifeline.org.
SAMHSA addiction and mental health treatment Referral Helpline, 1-877-SAMHSA7 (1-877-726-4727) and www.samhsa.gov

Пікірлер: 668
@dougbopst1
@dougbopst1 6 ай бұрын
Download the PDF of my memoir "From Felony to Fitness to Free" for FREE: dougbopst.com/FREE/ KZbin: kzbin.info/door/1xly1FdiIE2s8c5wUr2dgw Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/2kXk7ZbTzv4Lnf8lxLnnTn?si=940850e429184327 Apple: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-adversity-advantage/id1496406333
@leejganderson7827
@leejganderson7827 6 ай бұрын
😰💔👶💵💔👶💵😰👶💔 *Help 😮us* *Wake up 😮 Americans* *CPS" is Destroying* *low-income* families* ust to keep themselves in a job.. 😢👶💵💔👶😢💵* *Please look 🥺* Another system that destroys the families especially lower income* *The Corrupt Business of* *Children Protective Services* By former Georgia *Senator Nancy Schaefer* Plus her talking to Inforwars Alex Jones Follow The🕊️💵🕊️😮 5.21.2022 Peace 🕊️🙏🕊️ Now why isn't CPS ever looked into..?!?!?! 9.12.2023 11.3.2023 *HELP* 😮. 1.22.2024..
@GabrielJames-ti3jf
@GabrielJames-ti3jf 5 ай бұрын
Why the micro edits? Untrustworthy channel.
@Ryan-xq3kl
@Ryan-xq3kl 5 ай бұрын
my parents broke all these rules and i just managed to survive with enough of my own money and not having killed myself in 7th grade. now that they can see i am not outwardly suicidal they have even less tried to fix their own issues and i am worried that i will bear their burden that i have noticed since middle school properly analyzed was gaslighted out of believing then and am relearning right now was totally correct. what the fuck am i supposed to do? why am i cursed with this life?
@eduardowosgrau4468
@eduardowosgrau4468 3 ай бұрын
😅😅
@joyporcella81
@joyporcella81 6 ай бұрын
When my real dad died in Vietnam I would see my mom fall to a deep depression and cry all the time and I would console her. I was my moms psychiatrist and put my close and play on music and sing and dance for her like a little clown. She would smile and sing along with me. I lost her to brain cancer and I took care of her untill the end. I love and miss her and when I die I cant wait to reconnect with both of them. I was an only child and always played alone and care for ppl. I love life and have alot of care for others and feel my best when I make someone not feel alone. Thank you Dr.and I will take this and share it with others.
@dachater1
@dachater1 6 ай бұрын
So beautiful- you sound like an incredible soul. thanks for sharing!
@sue-lou-star
@sue-lou-star 6 ай бұрын
🌹
@valoak928
@valoak928 6 ай бұрын
😘
@janetcorbin2642
@janetcorbin2642 6 ай бұрын
Sounds very similiar to my daughter, an only child who has an alcoholic father. So happy to hear you have a good life, so does my daughter! ❤ ❤
@tammydietschweiler7852
@tammydietschweiler7852 6 ай бұрын
You are such a lovely person! ❤
@mariamarshall6116
@mariamarshall6116 6 ай бұрын
Dr. Mate just drips compassion , even the tone of his voice is compassionate
@davids8127
@davids8127 6 ай бұрын
I'm working on mine too with Mindfulness and metta meditation. Your mental state has a big influence on the tone of your voice
@Pluralofvinylisvinyls
@Pluralofvinylisvinyls 5 ай бұрын
Eww
@robynhope219
@robynhope219 5 ай бұрын
You don't know him... he is acting!
@SueE17
@SueE17 4 ай бұрын
Yes! I love him; and his sons
@Pluralofvinylisvinyls
@Pluralofvinylisvinyls 4 ай бұрын
@@SueE17 and his sons… what???
@Karlagarciamusic
@Karlagarciamusic 6 ай бұрын
A person who teaches about something because they experience it themselves I think that is real teaching … thanks
@damianjones6546
@damianjones6546 5 ай бұрын
I agree, the best mental health practitioner I have ever come across suffered with bipolar himself.
@claudiaschneider5744
@claudiaschneider5744 3 ай бұрын
Yes indeed - I´ve found somebody who went almost through same kind of bs in personal life.
@AnnaAparicio
@AnnaAparicio 6 ай бұрын
to hear him admit to having suicidal thoughts is both surprising and refreshing, and so helpful. For those of us who have been made to believe we are weird for not being like our parents or siblings, for those of us good, smart , creative people who have ended up sabotaging relationships, getting into dangerous relationships, underperforming academically, living materially mediocre lives, feeling alien, alone, lonely,... this helps
@phoenixlight1111
@phoenixlight1111 6 ай бұрын
You've said it perfectly and beautifully, these are exactly my feelings too. This helps me too, as well as your comment. Thank you. 💗
@elainehiggins713
@elainehiggins713 5 ай бұрын
I think that almost everyone has had thoughts of suicide, if only fleeting ones. I may be wrong.
@nensi1972
@nensi1972 5 ай бұрын
...🙏🏻❤️
@MichaelYoung-xp5ko
@MichaelYoung-xp5ko 4 ай бұрын
That's me 😮
@VaronPlateando
@VaronPlateando 3 ай бұрын
I didn‘t find the issue with S.I. surprising at all. but he didn‘t end up dwelling only there. which came out good for many people, in his case.
@jamesbutler5908
@jamesbutler5908 4 ай бұрын
We weren't born mad but driven mad😢
@hereshoping6992
@hereshoping6992 3 ай бұрын
Niceeeee
@Vancouver_1986
@Vancouver_1986 2 ай бұрын
Modern Society demands so much from us. It's 100% unrealistic.
@rustymugg9658
@rustymugg9658 Ай бұрын
😪💔💔💔
@kushysmoke3690
@kushysmoke3690 Ай бұрын
True true true
@Seforis-er2oc
@Seforis-er2oc Ай бұрын
Exactly, from the first moment. Even inside our mother we already are agitated because, if lucky, your dad is banging her. But this is nothing to what is waiting then, and to what is waiting now.
@1STBUCKLEY
@1STBUCKLEY 4 ай бұрын
Deep down I think fear of abandonment is root of all my anxiety
@briserenity
@briserenity 4 ай бұрын
Same here but for some reason I push people away . 😢😮
@airbloomamplifiers
@airbloomamplifiers 3 ай бұрын
I’ve never had long lasting romantic relationships for common reasons. I learned being alone is by far the best for me. It’s a great opportunity and the benefits should not be underestimated. Eat when you’re hungry. Sleep when you’re tired. Fully feel all feelings and allow them and even coax them out. We are not supposed to be happy all the time. We are never going to suffer emotionally for the last time until we die. It’s ok to cry or scream in rage. Allow it and it passes.
@Brissles
@Brissles 3 ай бұрын
​@@briserenityexample?
@kelseyfowler7236
@kelseyfowler7236 2 ай бұрын
For me it was fear of rejection... Been in therapy for years and only recently uncovered this. Everything we've covered recently points back to fear of rejection, and it is crushing!
@airbloomamplifiers
@airbloomamplifiers 3 ай бұрын
When I was younger (71 now) I believed the only acceptable answer was suicide. I couldn’t come up with any reason not to stop living. I suffered from panic attacks around people and had no clue why. I thought it was payment for a karmic debt. I don’t believe in that now. Luckily I am pretty happy today. One of the reasons is understanding it is me only in this life, and I taught myself to be self sustaining when I fully realized it is only me always and especially on my death bed.
@americasariesson1862
@americasariesson1862 2 ай бұрын
I think it’s karmic- I must’ve been a real bastard before - 55 now. How did you find that level of self sufficiency and connection?
@danielituarte4126
@danielituarte4126 2 ай бұрын
Hi Dear, Can you share how you got rid of your panic attacks. Thanks Luis
@wambuialice957
@wambuialice957 6 ай бұрын
I most certainly have enough of these childhood triggers
@wocannaseilai5983
@wocannaseilai5983 3 ай бұрын
😢
@viperdawgg2652
@viperdawgg2652 5 ай бұрын
Dr. Gabor is one of the most brilliant and compassionate people ever.
@pietrot.8780
@pietrot.8780 4 ай бұрын
"Live your life that you can live with."
@GyatRizzler69-of3wl
@GyatRizzler69-of3wl 18 күн бұрын
That sounds so grammatically stupid
@hannw7
@hannw7 6 ай бұрын
Dr. Gabor is such a blessing to society. I appreciate his views and writings so much. Thank you so much for asking about parenting.
@Sh0n0
@Sh0n0 6 ай бұрын
Your welcome
@violetaddams1035
@violetaddams1035 6 ай бұрын
I agree.
@justmadeit2
@justmadeit2 Ай бұрын
He’s a good guy, compassionate. I wish he was my therapist
@robynhope219
@robynhope219 Ай бұрын
O, pleeeez...
@CarmenRodriguez-ze2xg
@CarmenRodriguez-ze2xg 6 ай бұрын
There are many professionals who do not know how to treat, and can do a lot of damage. Every day I think more, that those who have gone through difficult life situations, are the ones who can best help others. I think that people who have not been through it cannot put themselves in the place, and do not know how to deal with trauma.
@fefetwaits2645
@fefetwaits2645 6 ай бұрын
This is so valid, trauma informed practioners are still rare. So grateful for Gabor, makes me feel less isolated ❤
@Dienohmite
@Dienohmite 6 ай бұрын
Dr.Mate’s calm, connected, compassionate voice and thoughts are healing on its own.
@pkp6791
@pkp6791 6 ай бұрын
1/ Recognize that you may have unhealed wounds. 2/ Seek assistance from an excellent therapist. If one has an inability to self reflect and be totally honest with oneself about his/her own contribution to his/her own unhappiness, it is especially important to seek assistance from a good therapist. Do not rely on strangers to heal your unhealed wounds. Get help from a professional. 3/ Your relationships with others will only be as healthy and consistent as YOU are within yourself. You owe it to yourself to heal your unhealed wounds and it is your responsibility to do so -- no one else's. 4/ The more healed you are, the more peace will become important to you. You will not be willing to admit unhealed energies, toxicity, chaos and even abuse into your life. At that point, solitude may actually become preferable or even desirable. Good luck to those who are intent on healing and recognize the importance of it. Good luck to those are still in darkness of not even realizing that you may need to focus on some aspects of healing within yourself( we all do).
@ktkee7161
@ktkee7161 5 ай бұрын
Not everyone can afford it and some professionals are crap.
@pkp6791
@pkp6791 5 ай бұрын
@@ktkee7161 Do you.✌️Stay toxic!😘
@ktkee7161
@ktkee7161 5 ай бұрын
@@pkp6791 😂 oh the irony
@bluegreenworld333
@bluegreenworld333 3 ай бұрын
Gabor woukd be more compassionate, he wouldn't say it like ' its no one else's responsibility' its a community thing, he'd be like listen to your younger self, hear it, and be kind to it. I'd recommend journalling to folk without therapists and listening to Gabor as regularly as needed.
@benwalton1039
@benwalton1039 3 ай бұрын
Such a passive aggressive response after giving what seemed like sound advice.
@lapecoraneradellafamiglia
@lapecoraneradellafamiglia 5 ай бұрын
Gabor Maté saved me from actually falling into misery. I was tilted by many losses I had to face last year and he helped me cultivating self-comprehension and self-compassion.
@nazarethforest8313
@nazarethforest8313 4 ай бұрын
'pecora nera della famiglia' wishing you pink dreams and blue skies...
@Job.Well.Done_01
@Job.Well.Done_01 2 ай бұрын
I had several tremendous losses in 2022/23 myself and they almost accumulated to a point of me vanishing. I started completely over again. Everything. Best wishes to you. ❤
@user-qz7zx2sd4v
@user-qz7zx2sd4v 2 ай бұрын
@mamaurku
@mamaurku 6 ай бұрын
I live in an indigenous community in the Andes where the natural family environment Dr. Mate speaks of as if it were lost long ago still exists. I know because I live here and I see it every day. I wish Dr. Mate could spend time here and learn that his ideal family model is still alive and now available to modern people from other cultures who think it is dead.
@nensi1972
@nensi1972 5 ай бұрын
...❤
@karendalsadik7119
@karendalsadik7119 5 ай бұрын
Great idea and thanks for sharing.
@mirandaandrea8215
@mirandaandrea8215 5 ай бұрын
Your lucky to have that❤
@pnaratik9383
@pnaratik9383 5 ай бұрын
I lived in Peru for 5 years, and travelled to the Andes many times, I was looking for something all those times, something that I felt was beyond ayahuasca retreats.. which kept eluding me but gave me that strange feeling of being on the right track.. I developed a cultural design project later on, I called it oriandina, I use traditional andean fabrics quite a lot.. my trauma and self worth issues keep blocking my progress but who knows.. I am still here trying and missing Peru.. un abrazo a la distancia
@MCE851
@MCE851 4 ай бұрын
He's talking about the west 🙄 this family structure is extinct in the west, obviously it still exists in less developed nations
@elliehayes3704
@elliehayes3704 3 ай бұрын
After just coming home from a 4 night wild camping trip with my two young boys I felt proud to hear this. Very true false values of a toxic culture.
@mitya6568
@mitya6568 5 ай бұрын
Lower your expectations in life and be happy at the moment
@SirusJolt
@SirusJolt 2 ай бұрын
I like to say myself: "Lower your expectations to a more realistic way and live a happy life".
@sybilwagner6211
@sybilwagner6211 3 ай бұрын
I wished my brother in law could have listened to your precious teachings in order to change his mind and not taking his life🙏😢Thank you for all your excellent work❤️
@mariamanuelgouveia6351
@mariamanuelgouveia6351 5 ай бұрын
After having raised my children and having divorced a long time ago, the empty nest syndrom has broken my heart. Despite being happy in my job as a high school teacher, there's an emptyness that I can't overcome. My memories of childhood leads to believe that being abandoned has been my fear along my whole life. At this age 56 everything is so clear when I look back: anxiety, depression and obsessed with pleasing everyone.
@noklarok
@noklarok 5 ай бұрын
having an empty nest shows that you were a good mother, you did not let your fear of abandonment ruin your children's futures which is an option other mothers take to cling to their children. 56 is not too old to find new friends, hobbies or even a new partner.
@shelley7209
@shelley7209 4 ай бұрын
I’m in the same boat! My only kid moved thousands of miles away and I haven’t been the same. I don’t know where the time went but I want it back so badly
@praktijkjoypowerelburgvand1104
@praktijkjoypowerelburgvand1104 4 ай бұрын
@markbrey52
@markbrey52 3 ай бұрын
You shouldn’t have divorced
@michellebenjamin4632
@michellebenjamin4632 3 ай бұрын
Omg me too x I’m 56 and have empty nest x
@nicolesabbagh7375
@nicolesabbagh7375 Ай бұрын
I like when he mentions that triggers are learning experiences; Times to find yourself. That’s good.
@rickyn4710
@rickyn4710 5 ай бұрын
Far out, i spent decades learning and practicing philosophy and psychology to deal with anxiety. Then randomly one day i said I give up, i surrender to God. I instantly cried like a baby, only stopping to randomly laugh between crying for like 20 minutes. No more anxiety. Miraculous. Wow, this God stuff is legit.
@mosestoliver4068
@mosestoliver4068 3 ай бұрын
Amen!!!
@scorps192
@scorps192 3 ай бұрын
Pumpy bums
@specimen532
@specimen532 2 ай бұрын
That's unfortunate that you found comfort in such an abhorrent entity as god.
@holyshiet787
@holyshiet787 2 ай бұрын
You mean, you had catharsis
@rosalinkrieger3352
@rosalinkrieger3352 Ай бұрын
Many of us are anxious because we can't afford rent, are housing insecure and don't earn enough money. What makes it even worse, is that all of this suffering and inequality is orchestrated by greed and indifference. How can one not feel unhappy and hopeless?
@VenomRoadRacing
@VenomRoadRacing Ай бұрын
Because you are the only person who can possibly care enough about you to change that for you. The system is the system. The world is fucked. Its up to you if you want to be a victim or not. Start a side hustle. Business.... don't know how. Sit online and research it. Use the internet to help your situation. Not numb you. You've taken all this information and just gone.... nahhhh nah can't be these things. I'll repeat. The world is fucked. You need to look after YOU. Stop looking at all those in the same position as yourself. Start looking at those who pushed through and made it out. Stop expecting the world will just give everybody abundance. Most people are doing nothing beyond where you are at. This is much less competition to then deal with if you wish to elevate your situation. I feel ya. I was you 3 years ago. Accept the world is fucked. Enjoy your blip of existence we are lucky to have. Get on with it. All the best.
@studywithmaike
@studywithmaike Ай бұрын
I don’t know. I have a similar issue and it manifested in my body … help lel
@celinejabbour5431
@celinejabbour5431 7 сағат бұрын
Real
@scatterbain1628
@scatterbain1628 3 ай бұрын
love the voice in your head being labelled "your stupid friend" such a great way to put it
@jessesebastiansamuel
@jessesebastiansamuel 4 ай бұрын
It’s unbelievable how screen is the only tool we have in our family to get our kids to eat and for us to have a bit of a breather. This requires some major changes in our own lives and address our own traumas. I’ve sensed for a long time that the more time our kids spend on the screen, the more they behave erratically in real life but I can’t convince my wife who says we have no other option.
@violetaddams1035
@violetaddams1035 6 ай бұрын
Gabor Mate is beyond words brilliant. What he said about believing the world is against you because you experienced it - spot on. If you have ptsd please read and listen to him.
@RahabsRedemption
@RahabsRedemption 6 ай бұрын
Healthy human connections, and connections to a higher purpose, spiritual with Holy Spirit at it's best 😊 I also had to walk away from a relationship and friendships that were bringing me down, they were narcissistic people who have not awakened to their brokenness. Daily Bible reading, a good church and a part time job that are supportive. I have found contentment in this, I am in my early 40s.
@xodus8077
@xodus8077 5 ай бұрын
Amen to that. The word of God is the way to truth, freedom and peace +
@bluegreenworld333
@bluegreenworld333 3 ай бұрын
Structure and community us healing 🙏
@arianebennion
@arianebennion 22 күн бұрын
Betrayal and childhood trauma set the stage for this last year of attempting suicide and trying to work with many different counselors, going to a psych ward, I was in waking nightmare. I started looking into traveling to a country to do assisted suicide. I had known about psilocybin and decided to microdose. It's been 6 weeks now of daily dosing. I'm finally functioning. I'm not suicidal now. I'm able to emotionally deal with life. I wish I did this in my 20s my life would be completely different. Psilocybin should be the first line of helping in emotional matters. It's literally moving mountains in my mind. I'm working hard in my life to bring about true happiness now.
@flowerfarmerscott
@flowerfarmerscott Күн бұрын
Psilocibin was very helpful to me in the short term, too. But my life was deeply traumatic for about 10 years so the "mechanics" of living well were badly broken. I'm struggling now to get my life circumstances back in order and it's really difficult!
@selmaselme1
@selmaselme1 6 ай бұрын
Gabor Maté as always you soothe my heart and make me feel relieved 🥺
@KiwikimNZ
@KiwikimNZ 5 ай бұрын
My mum was very neglectful, but she was also an escapist, she would bury herself in a magazine or a book, you would ask Her something and she would never take her eyes off the book or look at you, you knew dam well she was t listening it was bloody annoying! She still does it today! It is the same as your parent on their phone I guess and the child not feeling like what they have to say is important and what you say is not acknowledged or validated. It was like I wasn’t there. Her books were more important than I was. That pretty shitty really. Parents give your kids your full attention, social media is definitely not more important than your child and their need to feel like they are being heard! They are with us for such a short time ! Make every second count! (Empty nesters lol)
@dawndid5972
@dawndid5972 6 ай бұрын
Two extremely human gentlemen right here. It's ok to feel and not hide it.
@Sh0n0
@Sh0n0 6 ай бұрын
No its not okay to show weakness, be a man.
@haonyoass9556
@haonyoass9556 5 ай бұрын
I just discovered this guy yesterday and can’t believe how interesting and compassionate his insights are. I’m looking forward to learning more about his work.
@user-iy5pc3xo9k
@user-iy5pc3xo9k 5 ай бұрын
Madd respect for this old guy
@Dtchmastrkilla7
@Dtchmastrkilla7 4 ай бұрын
Not very respectful to call him an old guy
@hairstonwilliams2770
@hairstonwilliams2770 5 ай бұрын
I cried when i heard the way he explained the very first question.
@Thewolfshehowls
@Thewolfshehowls 21 күн бұрын
It's nice to know you're not alone right? Dannng keep making music and put it on your channel!
@susanmeadows627
@susanmeadows627 4 ай бұрын
Wow! I told my neighbor today that I can't get out of my own way! I've never heard anyone else say that. That is exactly how I feel. I'm 65 and have had depression and anxiety since elementary school. I feel like at my age I should be able to handle this. I try to give myself a break, not beat myself up. Going through my boyfriend having stage 3 pancreatic cancer right now. He was diagnosed a year ago and he's just finished radiation after going through chemo. Omg chemo brain. He didn't ask for this but its taken its toll on an already fragile relationship.
@bluegreenworld333
@bluegreenworld333 3 ай бұрын
That's a hard place to be, I hope you find respite 🙏
@BuckleyDiaz
@BuckleyDiaz 5 ай бұрын
When he said talk to your 7 years old self I just started crying . I haven't slept for days . I have depression / insomnia / anxiety . I have so many traumas from childhood , and most of all I am a 30 years ild and I have no job . And I can't afford therapy . I stay up at night till 6 am and I am at thr level my heart started to hurt . Panic attacks every night and day . I exercised . I meditated . I turned to gid . Nothing works for me . Each time at night I just wonder , with all these things that are happening to me , am I gonna be alive tomorrow or am I gonna be dead . If only life is not this hard .
@Arrasel
@Arrasel 4 ай бұрын
Take medication I have generalized anxiety disorder and I sometimes take sleeping pills and benzo. Sometimes they are necessary. Better to take a pill than not sleep at all.
@kaoticmind09
@kaoticmind09 3 ай бұрын
​@@ArraselAgreed. Try an ssri. I tried Lexapro and it changed my life. Time to heal now. But this took a weight off of my shoulder to help me focus.
@RD12349
@RD12349 3 ай бұрын
Take one day one hour at a time. Live in present. Find higher power. We are not in complete control of our liives. Life is hard and unfair. You have to deal with the hand given to you and make the best of it. Things cut nothing remains the same. Miracles happen. Read about Santa lives Go to Catholic church and stare at the cross & alter & pray. God loves you. Jesus saves.
@markpowell6062
@markpowell6062 2 ай бұрын
Hear you there mate . I'm same as you . Deeply feel for you. Hang in there 🙏 x
@mbm3099
@mbm3099 2 ай бұрын
Accept what happened did....not your fault....but continuing or changing is your choice.
@lauraselig4904
@lauraselig4904 6 ай бұрын
Love Gabor ❤ always has the best advice that I can directly relate to, and he has such a calming presence about him
@venturesomeactivist
@venturesomeactivist 6 ай бұрын
I think this taught me a lot about how the language we use can hinder us from actually finding a solution to move forward in stead of perpetually victimizing and shaming ourselves. Objectively asking “why this is?” would allow a person to look outside of their suffering and have the presence of mind to actually analyze emotions and allow you to regain control over your life. When you’ve been raised in a volatile environment you tend to dwell on things and feel like you don’t have the ability to move forward because it is hard to express why things trigger you or even what triggers you until it happens and you don’t have to tools to process your emotions or regulate your thoughts. Great video! ❤
@ksc2736
@ksc2736 6 ай бұрын
Learning from being triggered only works if the person who triggers you is mentally healthy and does not mean to hurt you
@LaymensLament
@LaymensLament 6 ай бұрын
you are still free to choose your response, if you cant thats why its a trigger. but thats why hes talking about ammunition. you are (in most cases, as an adult) not dependant on the other persons intet.
@bananaman17
@bananaman17 6 ай бұрын
@@LaymensLamenti really hope people take the time to read your response and not just agree with the other comment. it’s spot on.
@Antonocon
@Antonocon 6 ай бұрын
@@LaymensLamenthow do you get over all of your triggers? Won’t some have many more than others. Wouldn’t it depend on the amount of trauma you’ve gone through? Feels like it would only be a choice after you have dealt with the trigger. Do you mean your verbal response or physical? I thought it was not possible to completely get rid of the trauma we have over certain things. We can just acknowledge and accept some of it and not let it control our lives.
@rachelsmename6
@rachelsmename6 5 ай бұрын
@@Antonoconone trigger at a time. It doesn’t have to be overnight. Something that helps is learning about how to use Internal Family Systems (IFS). Lots about that on KZbin.
@JoeySkate24
@JoeySkate24 5 ай бұрын
Thats not true though is it? The point is that in every case you got triggered. Something happened within you. Another person would say "oh that stupid guy again will talk negatively about me whatever" and brush it off and move on with their day not caring about it. Yet youre getting triggered. That means something about you. Happening inside of you. I wish you well and to overcome your issues
@JIMKATSANIDIS
@JIMKATSANIDIS 6 ай бұрын
Great video! If you feel lost in life, you might feel unmotivated and uninterested in your hobbies. You might feel “like life is meaningless.” You might no longer recognize yourself. Creating healthy ways to manage intense emotions can help you cope better, and avoid risk of suicide. Some of the things you can do are: Acknowledge and accept how you’re feeling, Take compassionate care of yourself, Keep engaging in activities that make you feel good, Attend inspirational events, Seek out help from a therapist. Thank you for the inspiring video Doug and Dr. Gabor!🙌❤👍
@robynhope219
@robynhope219 6 ай бұрын
He is not a licensed doctor. Just a shrewd and self interested businessman...selling books and selling himself.
@robynhope219
@robynhope219 6 ай бұрын
Forget to mention: visit dr bessel van der kolk, worlds best trauma expert.
@JIMKATSANIDIS
@JIMKATSANIDIS 6 ай бұрын
@@robynhope219 Robyn, Gabor Maté is a Hungarian-Canadian licensed therapist-physician and author. He is internationally recognised for his expertise in addiction, trauma. Dr. Gabor is a well-respected clinician and is listed as a doctor in many sites.👋
@EugenieMacGillavry
@EugenieMacGillavry 6 ай бұрын
​​​@@robynhope219 a licence proofs that we rembered what has been put in our heads. Knowledge is using our heads with or without licence. Wisdom is knowing where knowledge is useles when there is no Understanding and Compassion used. For those 2 skills , no licence requiered only a loving heart. 😊
@robynhope219
@robynhope219 6 ай бұрын
@@EugenieMacGillavry not convinced he has a loving ❤️
@a.mary90
@a.mary90 27 күн бұрын
So blessed I never had a tv in my room ever growing up
@user-de1fk2by5h
@user-de1fk2by5h 26 күн бұрын
Dont call my "friend" " stupid"...😂😂😂😂 ❤❤❤❤❤ Thank you Dr.
@smroog
@smroog Ай бұрын
I would love to hear Dr. Mate's opinion on Peter Walker's book "Complex PTSD". After 70 years of dealing with what I have been told is Clinical Depression I found "Complex PTSD" the most informative and the best there is out there. Dr. Gabor is definitely on he right track. It is all about the first years of life. Do we feel safe and secure. Do we trust others. Basically my self esteem. Do I love me. Am I confident that I can handle life. or do I live in constant fear. Being alone with a person I do not believe is able to live life alone. Constant fear of who I really am. I have ordered Myth of Normal so maybe the answer is close.
@phoenixlight1111
@phoenixlight1111 6 ай бұрын
I very, very, very much needed this today. It's been really fascinating to me that over the past few days, the videos I've needed to listen to have been coming into my stream for some reason, guided I'm sure. I've been struggling intensely, ready to check out. I went through intensive therapy (DBT, CBT) about 8 yrs ago...I thought I was 'fixed' and then as it seems to go, I feel like I take 3 steps back again, ultimately. I'm diagnosed with ComplexPTSD/Borderline Personality Disorder....it's been very difficult lately. I have been experiencing flashbacks, intense emotions, alone, lost, stuck, angry, overwhelmed, defective, a mess. I always feel so incredibly soothed and comforted when I hear Dr. Mate'.....it soothes me deep in my Soul. I needed to hear this today, and I'm grateful to be here listening. Thank you.
@jonathantrunz4482
@jonathantrunz4482 6 ай бұрын
Currently reading “The body keeps the score”. Check it out. Best.
@Brissles
@Brissles 3 ай бұрын
I'll be your friend
@kaanaydemi.r
@kaanaydemi.r 6 ай бұрын
Dr. Gabor Maté is a gem!
@paulalane8638
@paulalane8638 2 ай бұрын
So simple, yet so profound. .response to triggers! Imagine a world where we could respond without the pain, rage and defense! I believe it's possible. On my healing journey. I'm hard on myself as well because my alcoholic mom criticized me. I thought something wrongvwith me. My alcoholic husband triggers me. Thats a 60 year old voice!THANK YOU, DR. GABOR MATE!❤️☺️
@GraceNow
@GraceNow 5 ай бұрын
I need all the doctors he spoke of and him and a few others on staff for myself. My X wife dis not understand when I told her, the professionals need professionals.. Never ever give up. I know I love u
@VenturaMargherita
@VenturaMargherita 2 ай бұрын
I’m on my way to becoming a Somatic Experiencing practitioner and to hear Gabor Mate validating this training feels so good! I’m honored to help others heal their deep wounds.
@Violet_Moone13
@Violet_Moone13 12 күн бұрын
I hope you touch many lives & help them heal, & still find a way to be accessible 🙏🏽 I was excited I finally was able to locate a couple somatic practitioners in my area only to find they are $200-300 per session & don’t take insurance. I would pay that if I could but 2 kids & bills, I just don’t have it so back to trying to figure it out on my own
@VenturaMargherita
@VenturaMargherita 11 күн бұрын
@@Violet_Moone13 Thank you, Violet! That is indeed a lot of money and financial strain is no joke. It is a bummer that most of us Somatic Experiencing practitioners are unable to take insurance. One of my classmates is a therapist from Kaiser. I could check in with her and see if she knows of an SEP that can take insurance and works online. I'll get back to you. I want you to be able to find the best support and not feel financially stressed.
@yukia.animation
@yukia.animation 2 ай бұрын
The weight of empathy and compassion from Dr.Gabor Mate's talk strikes me every time I listen... I'm a sensitive person, an animator, struggling with on and off depression since high school, and then bipolar disorder since my early 20s. The world has always been an extremely anxiety provoking place in my eyes. Out of pain and desperation, I sought ways to harm or even kill myself up until a few months ago when I became pregnant. At the same time I KNEW exactly how much I wanted to live, I wanted to live relatively peacefully. I want life. I don't want to kill myself - that was my last resort planned in face of unresolvable suffering. Dr.Mate's talk made me feel heard.
@tjvirginia1319
@tjvirginia1319 2 ай бұрын
I'm so sorry for what you've gone through, but I am so thrilled to hear that you are holding tightly onto this desire to live. Have you ever thought of doing genetic testing to see what might be affecting your glutamate and gabba levels? Some people can produce gabba, but they have now discovered if they receptors aren't functioning properly they will still have all the symptoms such as bipolar, etc. there is an amazing company in Ephrata Pennsylvania called tree of life and they do genetic testing and help you on how to support your genetic variants that might be part of the cause. I love Emily with that company to do consulting with.
@evadebruijn
@evadebruijn 6 ай бұрын
Those first three years... I hear it still, so often, how one parent accuses the more attentive parent of "spoiling" their child, a baby, it truly breaks my heart how deeply ingrained this is, so far drifted off the natural instincts, see how a mother ape will always attent to her babies cries. ✌️
@tnt01
@tnt01 6 ай бұрын
Yes, narcissists will drain your soul.
@tedwilson1477
@tedwilson1477 6 ай бұрын
only if you are unaware, if you are fully aware, they have no power.
@tnt01
@tnt01 6 ай бұрын
@@tedwilson1477 obviously.
@tedwilson1477
@tedwilson1477 6 ай бұрын
@@tnt01 not for the unaware, which is a lot of people.
@shirleyfrost9909
@shirleyfrost9909 6 ай бұрын
I never felt safe in my childhood home, only recently found that my mother was a malignant narcissist. Healing slowly now at 70.
@Paragon_Reason
@Paragon_Reason 3 ай бұрын
My mother. Selfish horrible narcissist. Like I don't want her to die, but I do look forward to the day that it's done, and I can finally have relief from her drama, and Indifference that's caused so much trauma
@linhquy2913
@linhquy2913 6 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for posting this and your important questions. I’m truly grateful I came across this video. Dr. Mate’s work is so critical and your questions are so honest and relatable. I really do thank you for this because I definitely needed to hear this. Finally, a video with actual answers! 👏👏👏
@tinaahl4597
@tinaahl4597 4 ай бұрын
I had to listen to this a few times. There is so much healing in every word Dr.says. it is very difficult to find a good specialist in all medical departments. One needs $$$$. I went to the public library where I found some helpful work books❤
@joh.9531
@joh.9531 6 ай бұрын
Wonderful talk, wonderful man - great depth in bringing to the surface the benefit of looking into trauma deeply. Thank you
@jontamlyn6375
@jontamlyn6375 6 ай бұрын
Such a profoundly wonderful and insightful man. Thank you, Gabor.
@jonnyh7936
@jonnyh7936 3 ай бұрын
I listen to quite a lot if this type of content , regarding mental health etc, and Gabor really has something special for me. He makes sense in a good relatable way.
@Millbie
@Millbie 5 ай бұрын
Dr Gabor, i have & do watch you on KZbin & probably like so many others I feel you are 'speaking' to me & so understanding. Each time is like a therapy session. You are amazing so knowledgeable & you are relatable because you've lived so much of it. I have recommended you to so many people. 🤗
@hikkikei
@hikkikei 4 ай бұрын
This 15 mins talk is life-changing to me. Thank you so much.
@Sky10811
@Sky10811 4 ай бұрын
it s so true, that base of anxiety is the trauma! i honestly do not understand while treatment does not start from addressing the trauma!
@thehillmanator
@thehillmanator 3 ай бұрын
i watch this video every morning for the past week, every day i take more from it ! this man’s life experience have given him the most amazing understanding of human function, every human on earth could learn from this amazing man, thank you for taking the time to interview and post on here 👌
@TheEvilGrandmother
@TheEvilGrandmother 3 ай бұрын
Mate is a treasure for this world!
@Antonocon
@Antonocon 6 ай бұрын
I really needed to hear this right now. I fell through the universe yesterday evening when talking to someone I had felt was a friend. I was wrong.
@jameswayton2340
@jameswayton2340 6 ай бұрын
My autism makes me Victim at age 32 of the same thing at age 6. It’s called: everything I want, is to much. Think it kinda explains why i got triggered when people told me I’m in a victim mindset because they did not know I had autism and it just never stops. And I was already punishing myself thinking I was not trying hard enough.
@nensi1972
@nensi1972 5 ай бұрын
...🙏🏻❤️
@motoboy6666
@motoboy6666 5 ай бұрын
Same here, i still somewhat cant get to terms with accepting myself in that i just cant preform or that i get exhausted so easily. So much shame and limitations in being this way, and its just hard to accept.
@bingflosby
@bingflosby 5 ай бұрын
I have multiple sclerosis and doctor mate has helped me fight for my life I’m so grateful
@AL-sg2jd
@AL-sg2jd 4 ай бұрын
So beautiful. Seemed like a great girl by others reactions. May she rest in peace
@mariemonn8912
@mariemonn8912 6 ай бұрын
Love his honesty.. and that’s How we heal.. lol..
@bserene6328
@bserene6328 6 ай бұрын
Thank you Dr. Gabor for another great enlightening video.
@heartandsoul4520
@heartandsoul4520 5 ай бұрын
This so loving and brilliant. Needed it. Thanks Doc.
@gabrielepini7703
@gabrielepini7703 4 ай бұрын
Thank You. This very coincise and poignant conversation says it all….it really shines a light on a topic.❤
@meenabells9854
@meenabells9854 5 ай бұрын
Wow...thank you so much for this conversation. It's truly helpful.
@dbruce5760
@dbruce5760 5 ай бұрын
Absolutely wonderful content! Thank you!
@mikect05
@mikect05 Ай бұрын
I love Gabor so much. I am grateful for his teachings.
@bobblebec12
@bobblebec12 4 ай бұрын
Yay! I am normal! Just those words help!❤
@user-dt1vz4ce2w
@user-dt1vz4ce2w 6 ай бұрын
I love Dr Mate ❤for ever 🙏❤️I am from Transilvania and I am watching him from long time ☺️✌️
@phoenixlight1111
@phoenixlight1111 6 ай бұрын
Through my healing journey, there have been 2 people that have been the most profound teachers that have been deeply helpful to me, in addition to my clinical therapies. Eckhart Tolle, and Dr. Gabor Mate'. I know that if not for their guidance, wisdom. gentleness and teachings, I would not still be here today.
@Brissles
@Brissles 3 ай бұрын
The Power of Now is at my bedside
@christianmeza4529
@christianmeza4529 6 ай бұрын
Thank you Dr Gabor
@user-ui2if1lx2f
@user-ui2if1lx2f 4 ай бұрын
Thank you Dr Gabor for your valuable insights and helpful advice on the complexities of the human body and our emotions, the impact of our childhood experiences on our emotional development and wider health. Truly admire your courage to question, challenge and comment on today’s harmful societal norms and pressures of internet/screens, and the limitations of the training received by general doctors and therapists. Excellent video interview!! 👏🏼
@kabeverett
@kabeverett 6 ай бұрын
Excellent!!! Thank you
@mariamanuelgouveia6351
@mariamanuelgouveia6351 5 ай бұрын
It's so rewarding to listen from you and answering me is so important to me feeling loliness. You are a great human being besides your professional skills. I have no words to be so much grateful . ❤ Greetings from Portugal in the Algarve, once again from an EFL teacher of a high school. ❤❤❤
@bikepacker1367
@bikepacker1367 5 ай бұрын
I wanted to be helped iam not going to give up . Thank you dr you have help me more than mental health doctor that are just putting me on more medication no more pills
@Cori86
@Cori86 3 ай бұрын
We love you Gabor!
@missboheme3466
@missboheme3466 Ай бұрын
Listing to your conversation is really helpful to me at the moment. Thank you!
@maricazermatten2103
@maricazermatten2103 4 ай бұрын
Dr Mate is wonderful, love listening to him!
@gr33neyes1000
@gr33neyes1000 6 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this, in so many ways.
@mrbritesideoftheroad
@mrbritesideoftheroad 6 ай бұрын
Thanks for Your insight and wisdom 🙏
@dknox90803
@dknox90803 3 ай бұрын
This is so very helpful. I am crying listening to it.
@deedee9312
@deedee9312 5 ай бұрын
Dr. Gabor, this is such a game changer ! Hello young voice, goodbye now, I can handle this now! Love you 🥰 ❤ Tysm for all your teachings 😊
@elainemorris4806
@elainemorris4806 4 ай бұрын
This is excellent information. Thanks for sharing.
@banjiegirl2001
@banjiegirl2001 3 ай бұрын
I love his blue glasses❤
@alyssalee1116
@alyssalee1116 Ай бұрын
Gabor is AMAZING. Great interview!
@richoneplanet7561
@richoneplanet7561 6 ай бұрын
5:22 - great response - thank you for the perspective 👍🏻'I wonder why this is coming up?'
@devlina
@devlina 2 ай бұрын
Wow. That is a lot of wise advice to pack into 15 mins. Thanks for creating as an intro to Gabor Mate's wisdom.
@pgreen6840
@pgreen6840 6 ай бұрын
15:00 until the end is the goldmine in the message and a great game changer regarding our lives and healing backwards and forwards
@roslyntchakedjian927
@roslyntchakedjian927 24 күн бұрын
Thank you Dr Gabor Mate 🙏
@mirandaandrea8215
@mirandaandrea8215 5 ай бұрын
Gabor Mate is such a gift! ❤
@amethyst9264
@amethyst9264 2 ай бұрын
Omgoodness when he said about raising children, to take care of the emotional state, that got me. Children are sensitive enough to pick up on the ☹️
@timfinneran5047
@timfinneran5047 2 ай бұрын
Thank you for very interesting comments and discussion
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