Real Doctor Reacts to THIS IS GOING TO HURT // Episode 3

[@DrHopeSickNotes]

For advice and information on domestic abuse: www.womensaid.org.uk www.refuge.org.uk

[@hunterG60k]

I'd like to add a comment on DV/DA, as a survivor myself. One of the things that gets brought up when discussing this topic is "Why don't they leave when they have the chance?" or "Why do they defend their partners?". The reason is because they don't believe they will be able to get away for good. If there's any chance that they escape attempt won't succeed and they end up back in the hands of the abuser then their life will be made even worse for making the attempt. One of the tactics of abusers is to isolate people from their support network so that they believe they have no one who cares about them or who would help them. Usually people who know the abuser won't suspect anything because these people are manipulative and clever, they'll be on their best behaviour around others. That's the only thing I found slightly unrealistic about the story line, otherwise it was very good. Abuse victims will make all the excuses under the sun for the behaviour of their abuser but the words have been put there, if they didn't defend it they'd be punished for that.

[@vg7735]

​@@hunterG60k What about where kids are involved. Why do some victims choose to have kids with someone abusing them? Why do some parents not do everything in their power to protect their kids and take them away from being abused or witnessing abuse? That is what I don't get.

[@hunterG60k]

@@vg7735 This is something that I've struggled to get my head around in the past. Personally I think this would be the point where I had to get out, the alarm bells would ring too loud. But you never really know what you'll do until you're in that situation. I was lucky, some people have no support and may never have had any. I can only assume that they are so traumatised as to be in pure survival mode and unable to comprehend the consequences of exposing their children to it. I try to be as generous as I can to victims. We should be asking how can abusers bring children into such an environment, or treat children the way they do.

[@fevre_dream8542]

@@vg7735 Sometimes, they don't get much of a choice when it comes to having kids with an abuser. There is a large component of psychological/emotional/financial control in a lot of abuse cases, and as mentioned in this video almost 30% of these DV cases _begin_ when pregnant. Those DV cases that begin before pregnancy often have a large sexual abuse component too. As far as protecting or removing children from the situation, it was made abundantly clear to my mother that if she fled with us kids she would be hunted down (by her abuser) and every one of us would be killed. The risks of running (having her children killed) outweighed the risks of staying (being beaten and manipulated). It's not as easy a decision as you're making it out to be, and I think you're _highly_ underestimating how deeply and thoroughly an abuser undermines every aspect of a victim's life subtly and over time. Once you realize you're in it, it's often too late. Without significant evidence, the police aren't going to protect you. There are always going to be times at which you or your children are not protected from the abuser you ran from. There's a good chance that the abuser has control over your finances, your (and your children's) legal documents, and has cut you off from any source of aid. Yes, you can get out; but people who look in from the outside and go "Well, I just don't know why they didn't get out sooner" have _no_ idea the choices that have to be made.

[@sylviagreybe672]

Yay I really love watching your reactions to this series. It is truly fantastic. I worked in the NHS in London for 9 years and this programme is the most accurate depiction of real life in the NHS I've ever seen. Can't wait for your next reaction.

[@DrHopeSickNotes]

Agreed they definitely did their research

[@andonel]

This show seems to bring a lot of key moments that really make me appreciate the medical field and its staff even more. Although, you’ve already teaching this for a while now, Dr. Hope, so I’m not surprised ;) thank you.

[@DrHopeSickNotes]

Thanks Ando!

[@curtismckenley8706]

People keep forgetting this is set in early 2000s. Where mental health is not a concern as it is now days .

[@mahalabradford6094]

Couldn't agree more

[@LordMarvin1993]

I think even now people don't grasp the sheer scale of the mental health epidemic going on right now

[@aaliyahpatel2819]

“This show doesn’t get any flipping easier does it?”- oh you have no idea... can’t wait to watch your reactions for the next few episodes

[@Nat-qj6cr]

the next few episodes are very intense

[@EllaChinois]

I like Shruti's character. It's heartbreaking to see the tragic turn of her story though.

[@oxoelfoxo]

oh no! what happened to her?

[@Liorte1973]

@@oxoelfoxo spoilers. It is tragic though.

[@euphoricsadnessx]

@@oxoelfoxo commited suicide after burnout

[@Snailryder]

Her character is made up, just FYI

[@johnhagans2190]

@@Snailrydercheck your stats on medical professional suicides in the UK.

[@andieatlanta62]

- it's crazy the amount of realism in this show. I don't think I've seen a show closer to modern hospital workings and that fact that it doesn't hold any punches with its episodes is also brilliantly eye-opening. Loving your take on the episodes!

[@AyresAY]

So happy you keep doing more episodes! Really, really insightful commentary about a wonderful(ly acted) show. Would absolutely be wonderful if you did more (the whole series preferably :)). I'm especially curious about your reaction to the final episode of the series.

[@ZED2.0]

I think Adam summed it up nicely at the end of the video, you'd go private for routine procedures/minor ops. The NHS is more equipped to handle emergencies because emergencies are going on all the time.

[@katiehettinger7857]

Like many life changing decisions, leaving an abusive relationship is a process and coming to point where one chooses to embrace the uncertainty that seeking a safer life often takes time.

[@sallywood3304]

Having worked within the ICU environment for many years I can only agree with your very clear analysis of the show. My medical mates tend to agree the show is true to life, and dare I say death!

[@vladimirimp]

Dr Hope - I love your channel (found it in 2020 as we hit the first lockdown) and want to say that 'This is Going to Hurt' was one of the most incredible shows I ever saw, and your response videos to it are fantastic and given even more fascinating insight. Thank you. Please, please, please keep going. The series has way more to give and I can't wait to hear your response to some of the events ahead. Thank you.

[@DrHopeSickNotes]

Thanks so much for supporting the channel

[@oldschoolm8]

I’m really enjoying your take on such an amazing show. Its interesting to hear real perspective and experiences relating to it. For all the barbed jokes, pitch black humour, tragedy and outright cynicism in some scenes, it’s also bloody hilarious, sweet and very emotional too.

[@ThreadBomb]

This show has turned out to be a great launch point for discussion of real life in the NHS. I hope we'll see more of these videos.

[@JS-lu1uq]

Keep up the great work sir. Love your kindness and sensitivity in explaining these medical shows

[@sheilathepotter6636]

I am so happy the review of episode 3 dropped! I have been checking for it almost daily. 😄 Thank you Dr Hope for a fab review. Please do more!

[@susanhud3704]

Please continue to review this series, so interesting hearing your views and explanations x

[@tammyhines1585]

Thank you for a great reaction. I had a training on domestic abuse yesterday. I liked the both you and the show covered this very impotant topic.

[@tammyhines1585]

Sorry, shoul say important.

[@NicksGotBeef]

Thanks for another great reaction vid. I’m just loving this series. About one of the hardest watches I’ve seen in a long time. I honestly don’t know how you guys do it.

[@ash44roberts]

Really enjoyed your analysis of the first three episodes. Having watched all seven myself, can’t wait to see your reaction as the series plays out…

[@lafregaste]

Having worked as an interpreter for hospitals and the police I have witnessed many times that situation. Unfortunately abuse victims rarely speak up, it's hard and painful sometimes, because you really want to help them, but you can break the boundaries of your job, and you have to respect their decisions as well.

[@wol_ves]

Definitely would love to see your reactions to future episodes of this show. Thank you again Dr Hope!

[@Abhi-wl5yt]

I really have great respect for Doctors. These reaction videos show us how difficult situations can be in your day to day life. Really appreciate you sharing it with us!

[@alexclimbs9]

really enjoying this series, thanks so much for doing them!

[@sebastianquinn1530]

I loved this show. It’s given me more appreciation for the role people do in hospitals. Definitely keep posting the videos.

[@iselldreams]

I loved the book and I wasn't disappointed with the telly show. I don't work in the NHS but I have spent a lot of time in hospitals. The NHS staff are amazing and do a very hard job. Well done Dr Hope 💕

[@eloiseparker2418]

Thank you so much for continuing your reactions to this show - I loved the book and show and your commentary from experiencing being a junior doctor in the NHS yourself is so interesting. Please keep doing the whole show - these are my favourite videos of yours

[@ballinjosh03]

Amazing video and an amazing look at situations most probably don't think about outside of physical health issues in a hospital.

[@MattFern81]

Loved this series & loving our reactions vids also. Entertaining & informative. Thank you dude. X

[@chiarardn2401]

Just discovered this channel and I think it's amazing! Can't wait to watch your reactions to the other episodes of the show!

[@Kiran.Morjaria]

Yes! Loving your reaction to the series, I just finished my reaction to episode 5 and I’m looking forward to checking out the final few

[@lolapkh]

Thanks for the great reaction video. Tho whole series is excellent and thought provoking for sure. I look forward to your next video 😊

[@nicolevangellecom6405]

Love your reactions on this show. It makes me wanna see this whole series. I like how you explain/compare things in these episodes from your own experiences. Now i really wanna watch this show!

[@57778]

Nice, just found your videos a few hours ago, read the book and its nice to see a breakdown of it

[@kathymchugh689]

Thank you SO much for reacting to this show! I live in the USA so can't watch it here. I've really enjoyed your videos! Thank you SO much!!

[@bunnerkins]

I went to a grand rounds presentation that was all about new guidelines for physicians that are called on for emergencies on flights. The physician giving the presentation warned that there is probably a much higher chance that you will be recognized as a physician than you might appreciate (especially as emerg docs), and that getting found out for doing that can be a shitty situation.

[@gazwalton]

please continue these videos I loved this series but your perspective is great!

[@LongdownConker]

I love watching your detailed reactions to this show. Thank you for taking the time to do them and I look forward to the next one 😊

[@shaggycan]

8:00 literally the check list of denial. I don't know about the curriculum these days, but learning about signs of an abusive relationship should be taught right along with sex ed. It's every bit as important.

[@lorenzodocx4021]

I already binged the series and boy did it do something to me (i'm a med student). Very emotional

[@ZED2.0]

😬 hope you're okay, it is very emotional

[@lorenzodocx4021]

@@ZED2.0 yeah i'm okay now thx!

[@Roneish1996]

Because of your previous videos on this show I watched the entire series. Great show.

[@candywoodgate1269]

I always enjoy and value your take on anything, cells at work, House, this is going to hurt. Please continue xx

[@michaelmay5453]

Where I'm from even if the patient is reluctant to report it the hospital has to and in this case the case against him involves a third party. Also, we would NOT let the son stay with either parent unless the mother and father agrees to living at separate locations, usually monitored by an ankle monitor until trial starts. We've had far too many "accidents" happening after we spotted this type of abuse so we changed our laws.

[@darriendastar3941]

This was an amazing series. There were times when it was an absolute emotional gut-punch - there were so many things (good and bad) that I just didn't see coming. So, yes please. I'd love to see more of your reactions to it.

[@mindral1289]

I would absolutely love to keep seeing your reactions to the show!

[@wongd12]

This is an excellent dramatisation of Adams life. I found it compelling viewing. He has not rewritten his character to be a paragon of virtue. Very warts an all story telling. Excellent break of the 4th wall to let us in to his inner thoughts. I'm left with complete admiration for NHS staff and wanting to do something constructive, but not sure what would be meaningful (the clapping during covid19 seems particularly useless)

[@deborahmackenzie1935]

Couldn’t agree more

[@dantedoomsday]

looking forward to more episodes of this series

[@MartinB_Art_Design]

I really hope this show lights a fire in people suffering from domestic abuse. Just talking to someone about it and what happens can go a long way to help. Don't let your abuser decide what is and isn't okay, regardless of who they are.

[@AR-zr1om]

This is such a great show, medicine mixed with the humour of afterlife. Genius

[@Richardincancale]

Amazing empathy Dr Hope!

[@Brainlizard]

Brilliant reaction. This series is the most real depiction of the everyday life in the nhs, and i really seldom watch hospital dramas because of the exaggerations of it. Well done to the team who made this series. And yes i worked in the NHS and i know how it feels like

[@KeepCaffeinated]

God, I remember having to consent, then perform a PR examination on a patient; unfortunately they were very deaf, and we were in a four bedded room with those flimsy curtains... can confirm they are not soundproof. No one in the room would meet my eye for at least the next hour

[@ErebosGR]

0:44 The author of the book, Adam Kay himself, wrote every episode and I don't think he wrote his character to lie to make him look cool. What I think is happening is that because his boyfriend has already given him an earful too many times about overtime, he refused to help out of guilt.

[@Snailryder]

In real life he was with a woman and had actually married her at some point in life - but they had to virtue signal and change the plot

[@DmitryKandiner]

Thank you, doctor! I always enjoy watching your videos and hear your explainations.

[@jonathanfitzharris4196]

Enjoying your reactions! Honestly was gripped with this show. Ben is just

[@bulbouspiranha758]

Another awesome breakdown. Loving this series so far, and your insight really adds something to it, looking forward to the next one :D

[@QUARTERMASTEREMI6]

Brilliant as always Dr Ed and it looks like someone got a haircut and shave! ☺️

[@theradgegadgie6352]

I do not understand how DNR is ever in a patient's best interests (unless they specifically ask for it) - for example: an elderly woman with an aortic aneurysm. Yes, there's a 99% chance that defibrilation or CPR will burst the damn thing, and even in the lucky 1% they come round in absolute shit state, but how is it really better to just let them bloody die‽ If this seems oddly precise for a medical Muggle, it's because I'm describing my mother. Or was describing her, as she was allowed to die about a fortnight ago.

[@ryanc473]

Huh, weird, at my hospital it seems like wet paint is just sorta a normal thing. I swear every other month there's signs all over the place warning of wet paint (and of course the halls smelling of wet paint). The walls are painted a basic beige over the incredibly normal appearing undercoat of basic beige. Honestly, I have no idea why the walls get painted as much and as often as they do, but I swear the walls have to be like 75% paint and only about 25% wall at this point.

[@deb02-o7s]

The curtain being soundproof rings true unfortunately for me just before a kidney biopsy the nurse the other side of it saying I've never assisted on one before I'm really nervous😳

[@deborahmackenzie1935]

OMG

[@ZED2.0]

Oh dear, hope it went okay!

[@deb02-o7s]

@@ZED2.0 well not particularly she had to move the equipment to the other side of bed didn't unplug it and pulled the heavily pregnant doctor onto me plus dr said I had to lie on that side for so many hours half way through nurse insisted I had to alternate so turned me despite me saying what I had been told just settled dr came back told me I had to get back on the other side 😂🙄 just one of a few incidents during that stay thankfully just one or two people of a fantastic otherwise team

[@ZED2.0]

@@deb02-o7s 😬😬

[@michelle9596]

Loving your reactions!!❤

[@lizrochester80]

I wish there was a video explanation like this one for DNARs, I’ve seen so many people (myself included) struggling to have that conversation.

[@elizabethdavies5186]

I suffered in an abusive relationship (before I transitioned) it’s such a weird place to be, knowing that this shouldn’t be happening to you but the abuser has you’re head so twisted up you actually believe it’s all because of you’re actions, it’s very hard to escape the kind of prison someone like that puts you in because it’s inside you’re head. I’ll never truly be able to forget the hell she put me through because of a few of the injuries she caused me and it is frightening how little domestic abuse towards men is highlighted, I doubt they would with this show of course but in other media. I’m a hospital porter and have got more than a few of those stories myself. Thanks for all the vids and you have kept me going through these horrible few years.

[@missjaninemorgan]

I love your reactions to this brilliant series. Please keep it up :)

[@joanhoffman3702]

I’d love to see more videos like this.

[@lullustration5775]

I live in the Netherlands and here they can hold you if they suspect abuse. My mom fell off her bike and hit her head on the curb a week before she had a scheduled endoscopy. By that time her face was all black and blue so she was not allowed to go home with my dad until after they had both been interviewed extensively and they were absolutely sure he didn't hit her. They also held me when I broke my ankle on a bouncy castle when I was 8 because my "x-rays didn't match my age" or something and they thought I was stolen so my parents had to provide pictures and my birth certificate

[@gdaymates431]

Please keep recording your thoughts on this series. It's such an important show.

[@Amalthea11]

Loved watching this one! Can I just ask what the doctor said at 9:00 abt the dogs please? That joke in the placenta episode. "They also eat their young and fuck sth..?" Played it 3x, didn't catch it as a non native speaker :( Thanks a lot!

[@DrHopeSickNotes]

"They also eat their young and f*** the furniture" :)

[@Amalthea11]

@@DrHopeSickNotes omg thank you!! So blessed to have received your reply, so fast. So I almost got it right 🤭😅

[@emmawilding886]

once i saw a death was confirmed by the on call rheumatologist but then it was the day shift cardiologist who did the 2nd check 2 hours later and actually filled out the death certificate. always thought that wouldve felt a bit weird. to legally sign off someones death not having been present when they died and only hearing what happend second hand

[@scrimpscromp]

Yes! Love love loved this show. The book was amazing too. Bit daunting as a med student tho 😅

[@applesolon993]

Yay!! Part 3! BTW you do have the same hair, Doc 😆

[@davidsphere]

I enjoyed all three of your reviews and will watch the series.

[@cws480]

Nice work, Doc. Good video.

[@n.rlanos1093]

If you hadnt done these videos, I would not have seen this brilliant show. Thank you!

[@jorenaut6660]

Yes! More like this please!

[@rosiehelendalesecondlifevlog]

Loved watching this series, the ending was so emotional and sad too

[@BrushQuill]

This was a great series and your reviews are brilliant. Please keep watching I want to know your thoughts on the end of the series!!!

[@francesT5877]

I loved the book and I think the show though very much a different beast is good. Fun watching these though don’t eat during them, which goes for the show too. Dr. Hope is obviously one of the very nice doctors, I haven’t seen many health care professionals but I’ve had my share of rude ones and condescending ones basically there are all kinds. I’ve also had great ones who cleaned me up after my appendix ruptured all over. I’ll remember my surgeon and anesthesiologist for the rest of my life. I think they have the Dr. Kay character voice a lot of things that he probably kept to himself irl? It’s clear watching him that Adam Kay is very intelligent. He knows when arguing with a mad person is a waste of breath.

[@veggiesupreme3556]

I really like the show but it does deviate from the book almost entirely

[@lanasartlife]

Why do I enjoy watching you watch this show that I don't even really want to watch?

[@Amalthea11]

Exactly, I don't even have the option to watch it but love seeing him reacting to it 😄

[@avanazy]

Really interesting insights, thank you for sharing

[@hellogoodbyeandallinbetween]

I love that you referenced the iconic Jackie Weaver 😂

[@shorea27]

Oh good Lord I was eating lunch when the placenta/blood clot eating scene came up 🤢😂🤮

[@OzeFlipper]

Hahahaha

[@ellenmeilee]

Would happily watch Dr Ed react to the drying of paint 🤩

[@joshchu]

If I tattooed "DNR if *certain life changing mutilation also occurred*" on my chest, would that be legally recognized??

[@aliciaclark7264]

In short, no. A DNR must be requested and signed by a doctor. I believe you must be confirmed to be of sound mind. And the DNR needs to be filed. A DNR can be rescinded if you change your mind but a tattoo cant, so doctors can't be sure that its relevant to your current circumstances. There was a case of a young man who got DNR tattooed on him as a drunken dare and then everytime he went into hospital he had to explain he wasnt actually DNR. Its cases like this where validity comes into play. Also theres no guarantee that DNR doesnt stand for Daniel Neil Roberts (for example) or another loved ones name. Therefore most of the time its completely ignored. If you are thinking of getting DNR tattooed on you, my advice would be dont.

[@joshchu]

@@aliciaclark7264 thank a lot for amount of efforts to answer a drunk question, it's just, I've lost some physical privilege already. it just occur to me if even something happens again and turns the situation worse, can one make a pre-decision to just gone with the easy way.

[@alijoc]

Unrelated, but nice haircut Dr Hope! :D

[@ZED2.0]

This series hits too close to home sometimes 😣 It's so accurately depicted

[@Snailryder]

The woman being abused was a major deviation from the real anecdote...in the book, it was actually the kid who put the stickers on when they went toilet together

[@BadAtYoutube]

Doctor Hope should react to Perfect Surgeon, which is a manhwa (Korean manga or basically a colored comic) about a guy who gets an AI to help him without spoiling too much. It has a lot of medical terminology that I had no idea about when I read through it. But, since it's a read-through and not a video reaction content, it might be hard.

[@jema.flores]

Yei I'm early! ☘️ They better make a series 2.

[@Kiran.Morjaria]

Also, fresh trim!

[@Katielovegood44]

The labour wade near me got a paint job as the queens great grand daughter would be born there. I was in labour there myself a month after her... and can confirm

[@TrevaQ]

Great job, keep going.

[@valdenay7264]

1- is that you playing the outro music? 2- I've enjoyed watching you reacting amd breaking down this series. I like following along because I had zero idea that your uterus could collapse (new fear unlocked lol)

[@Tortie25]

Great to have your comments

[@applesolon993]

Doc, have you ever had an experience with that red dots? With a patient in a domestic abuse? And what's the most hostile patient/S.O. experience you've had?

[@maltesetony9030]

Excellent review of a great series!

[@Jaakkoism]

Its difficult to end or get out of domestic abuse, they are someone you have built a life with massively in any situation. You dont necessarily start with it being abusive or sometimes the methods of abuse cause difficulties in realising it or pulling away from it. Specially after being able to talk about it, maybe for the first or even generally, you want to go back to something that feels normal, safe because you know how to act and what to expect, so you go back. A lot of overlapping with the language of addiction to, where something is just for now, while something is going on, until something gets better, its not permanent. The positive is each yime these things happen, each moment talking about it or confiding or getting space,is one step closer to leaving it behind forever, for getting past the difficulties and getting away from the active inflicting of pain and trauma, both emotional and physical. Then you get to live again, it takes so much time to heal these wounds, and be able to be a person again, its difficult, but its wasier without the cause of the pain. Sorry for the long comment, went on a thing.

[@infernosierra]

ay, new haircut lookin' mighty fresh.

[@musikate1147]

great review - thanks Ed

[@DarkInos]

0:50 I do not know about your country.. but even here it is quite "norm" advice for doctors to not help outside their work. If I understood it correctly.. it is because they are "doctors" it is their "job" basically.. and if the "patient" dies under their care.. outside or inside the hospital, they will be in quite sh*tty problems thanks to it. Not exactly sure if it is correct.. but I would not be surprised.

[@DrHopeSickNotes]

Yeh I've heard in some countries that in might be an insurance issue - but I don't know if that's true or not. In the UK it's encouraged to help.

[@robynw6307]

Conversely, the only time my (now ex) husband wasn't violent was when I was pregnant.