Elon's Cybertruck Is Weird And Lame

yeah I drive
GET MY MERCH: crowdmade.com/collections/kap...
Notations: pastebin.com/uSFqHwAa
Be one of the fellas: / @kappakaijuofficial
Outro Music: / @musicofphil
Discord: discord.gg/Ty3VcQq

[@lilemoarts]

I don’t understand how you can advertise a car as “Apocalypse-proof” when it needs to be plugged in to working electrical infrastructure to charge, needs to download software updates from the internet before it even starts and can’t even handle a light rain shower without rusting.

[@calebharris292]

At some point, enough money divorces you from reality.

[@ghost942]

You don't understand, elons definition of apocalypse is not having money😅

[@kenpatchiramasama1076]

Apocalypse for rich folks means "poors and negroes" you forget

[@thepanpiper7715]

Or when the Toyota Hilux exists.

[@trouty606]

Not to mention that even if they had power through something like solar cells, the stupid truck would be bricked extremely quickly by either software issues or general maintenance. You know why they have beat to hell old cars in apocalypse movies? Because they're incredibly basic and repairable by any average joe with some automotive repair training and use of various accessible/swappable parts. You know what's ungodly complex with tons of specialized proprietary parts you'll never have access to? Tesla vehicles.

[@amayakhler1551]

it's street legal because of lobbying and not because it's as competent as it's advertised to be

[@elbolainas4174]

If it wasn't for lobbyists you'll see more japanese trucks on the streets and SUVs outright banned

[@StarPichu12]

which is why its also not street legal in others XD Can't drive em in Australia or the EU

[@meltdown6165]

It is only street legal in the US because the manufacturer can self-certify safety there ....

[@haku8135]

Vehicle safety in this country is laughable. Cars from like the START of cars, like the Model T, that have steering wheels that can IMPALE the driver and basically no safety features are street legal. But a small Japanese truck that's 100 times safer than the gigantic monsters we have are NOT street legal, because they're foreign.

[@ogzombieblunt4626]

Typical 'lobbying bad' braindead lefty take

[@Eden_Laika]

"The car made for _any planet."_ In fairness, most planets don't have liquid water, so it's an understandable oversight.

[@DustD.Reaper]

Elons definition of a planet is probably a perfectly round orb with no single point of elevation where the only weather is a cool day of spring with not too much sun or wind...and it would probably still get stuck

[@andrejg4136]

@@DustD.Reaper I don't think Elon is smart enough to realize that no planet is going to be uniformly spherical unless the entire process of planet formation that we've theorized is wrong. Mostly because you'd need at least a uniform gradient of density and as far as we know that just doesn't happen in real-space.

[@lsswappedcessna]

meanwhile Mars, with ice caps:

[@kayagorzan]

@@lsswappedcessnaPerhaps we could go and melt them

[@GreenPixel-Moosie]

​@@kayagorzan Only once we're done with Earth, I'm afraid!

[@dappermancer]

everything i learn about cybertrucks makes me realize that they were designed by a 12-year-old who watched iRobot once and thought it was “pretty cool”

[@DissedRedEngie]

This is basically what I did as a kid. The two differences being that my design had 6 wheels and the "blueprint" was made with layered glass. (in our school, we had a machine that could melt glass, and were told go make an art piece with broken pieces of glass)❤

[@supraguy4694]

Elon basically is a 12 year old trapped in a middle aged man's body.

[@JetFuelSE]

@@supraguy4694 Saying he's like a 12 year old is a massive insult towards 12 year olds.

[@vylbird8014]

@@supraguy4694 What's that Bojack Horseman quote... "The age when you get rich is the age you are forever" or something like that.

[@thepanpiper7715]

4 year old, actually - supposedly one of the reasons Musk insisted on this aesthetic was because his four year old son, Saxon, randomly commented that “the future doesn’t look like the future”.

[@2ndeaster]

Here's your $60k truck. Don't get it wet. Don't get it dirty. Don't drive it over sand. Don't drive it over mud. Don't drive it offroad. Don't drive it on regular road. Don't use a carwash. Don't use a car cover. Don't breath on it. Don't look at it funny. Don't. Just don't.

[@cloroker2058]

*100k truck

[@sebforce1165]

Bastard's harder to take care of than a Gremlin, _and people took this thing seriously?_

[@NickiRusin]

it's Apocalypse-proof tho, trust me bro

[@linkesocke4533]

Also don't use the gas pedal. It will get stuck.

[@linkesocke4533]

​@@cloroker2058That's only for the premium version. According to google you can get cheaper ones for 50k and a bit below 70k. Which is still way too much for this ugly crappy "car".

[@CupertinoEffect]

Finally that guy who went after the Elon Musk of game developers is here to talk about the YandereDev of car manufacturers.

[@megmorningstar4250]

I've read: malfunctions. still tracks tho

[@NickiRusin]

wow I actually forgot he started out with that

[@juliusmatijosius2219]

It's outrageous how much sense this remark makes

[@jstafriskyhusky2748]

To be fair musk actually put out something compared to yandere dev

[@AverageTrainEnthusiast]

@@jstafriskyhusky2748to also be fair if Yanderedev had the same kind of “fuck you money” that Musk has to buy out a company to humor their crazy bullshit he’d probably have something out by now too. That and, let’s be honest, the only reason this is even real is because of the blood sweat and tears of a bunch of actual engineers told to do the impossible. Not because of Musk specifically aside from bankrolling the project. Say what you want. Yanderedev has technically done more actual development work than Musk ever will in his entire life.

[@Shuttergun1]

The cybertruck is what happens when a vehicle manufacturer adopts the same mentality of “release now, fix later” that has plagued AAA game development for years now

[@lucas1309]

People still bought it, so... it works like AAA game development.

[@FullMoonOctober]

@@lucas1309 And my faith in humanity falls even lower in both cases.

[@JTBarrentine]

Release now*, fix later** *many years later **do not actually do this

[@artemisiakyrell7727]

Seriously I've never seen a car go into steam early access

[@patricaomas8750]

@@lucas1309 Generally my AAA game won't kill me if it crashes due to poor development.

[@DarthLego46]

As someone who has used a vibrating sex toy, I can confirm that engineers have successfully tackled the problem of having a waterproof rechargeable electrical device. Which leads me to my theory of the “Dryness Field” that must surround Musk at all times that is further backed up by his rocky relationship with Grimes.

[@elbolainas4174]

Weren't all his children made via in vitro fertilization? Your theory would explain it.

[@StCrimson667]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@NatCo-Supremacist]

degenerate

[@thepanpiper7715]

Invaluable data, thank you for your research.

[@RaveDecoy242]

Your data is refutable due to one demographic you forgot to account for: cryptobros enter a state, one that is comparable to an animal preparing to mate, whenever they see or read anything involving Elon. However, Musk is too much of a prude to utilize his fanboy's juices for his R&D.

[@SpoopySquid]

Congrats to Elon Musk for singlehandedly disproving the myth that Elon Musk is some kind of genius

[@rodneysmith873]

And yet his fans are entering MAXIMUM COPERDRIVE

[@bigchungus6827]

@@rodneysmith873 I think maximum overcope flows better

[@rodneysmith873]

@@bigchungus6827 yeah it has a better mouthfeel

[@flexygoo1295]

Where's your car made and manufactured by your company?

[@rodneysmith873]

@@flexygoo1295 are you stupid? That's not a point in anyone's favor. "His car might sick and be probably one of the worst cars ever made bit YOUVE never made a car!" Guess what? Neither did Elon.

[@LazarusJone01]

Is so ridiculous that the metal is that sharp because it means they didn't take the time to deburr the edges which is standard for any metal that's going to be handled.

[@jadeshay1]

That’s exactly what I thought too! Like, how CHEAP do you have to be to not fully process cut sheet metal?? Let alone cut sheet metal that is going to be handled regularly as part of the finished product?! It’s just lazy, honestly, he simply doesn’t care.

[@scottwooledge6387]

So cheap they charge $5K for clear coat, which is standard equipment on every other car and truck. And for a material that desperately needs clear coat. What a scam he is perpetuating. His fan boys are such marks.

[@user-zb9lv3gh8s]

Why TF are they hardening the sheet metal panels anyway? What a dumb idea, BUT: look how the door panels dent when people shoot guns at it. That deformation suggests its not hardened at all. In other words...it's all BS

[@Bewilderebeest]

My 2012 Mazda was totalled in a multi-car accident on the freeway in rush hour traffic. It was completely crumpled, but I walked away with literally one scratch. The guy in front of me had a huge pickup truck. The truck had barely a ding, but he suffered whiplash injuries. I can’t even imagine how much worse it would be in a Cybertruck!

[@NickiRusin]

rip 2012 Mazda, crumple zones did their job

[@bookie5667]

Sounds like your car did one of the jobs it was designed to do, ie protect you. I hope you find something as good as a replacement.

[@ithinkflutterawesome6511]

Those Mazdas crumple when they need to! Mine got totaled too, but I was totally fine. Wasn’t too bad a crash but if it didn’t have crumple zones it could have been. Miss her. RIP 2012 Mazda.

[@andrejg4136]

A fine example of why crumple zones are a thing. If you can have 50 car pileup in winter and keep the number of major injuries and deaths under 5, you are doing your job.

[@WobblesandBean]

Yup. My dad used to drive an RX-7 and the exact same thing happened to him. I miss that car.

[@arned3901]

Elon Musk is the harbinger of mediocre consumerism

[@PleaseHoldy]

I wouldn't even say mediocre, just straight up dangerous.

[@adrianomaly1760]

A harbinger would be the message carrier. I’d say he’s like the poster child.

[@HamStrains]

Look I have no issue with him doing a futurism or a mars if he wants to, he can even be evil. My issue is when do we get that third boob the movies promised us in the future.

[@AshChiCupcak]

​@@HamStrainsI don't know why this immediately make me think of the uniboob lady from Kung Pow "I'm sorry, what were you saying" 😂

[@norcodaev]

⁠@@HamStrainsAhhh yes. Since the moment I first saw Total Recall back in the 90’s as a teenager, I too have been waiting for that day with great anticipation!

[@Foostini]

I'm not a car person either but you don't have to be a chef to know when the food tastes bad, y'know?

[@canieto1]

I own a Tesla and it is the best and funnest car I have ever owned. It costs me $30 per month in electricity driving about 1300 miles per month. Other cars feel broken when I drive them after the Tesla. I have a model 3. they are super cheap right now too

[@snooganslestat2030]

Funnest? Not a quality I would look for in a car.

[@AlexWeiner]

No, but you do have to taste it to know it tastes bad. This guy… hasn’t driven the truck

[@None-Trick_Pony]

​@@AlexWeinerA better analogy is that you don't have to be a civil engineer to know when a bridge has already collapsed into the river valley below, leaving a trail of devastation on the mountainside and killing an innocent couple who were out canoeing.

[@HANKTHEDANKEST]

@@canieto1 Cool story bro, they're cheap for a reason. I'm sure it'll still work fine in another 10 years :)

[@phillanderson434]

Time for the bi annual Australian KZbin video

[@luigiluigi543212345]

I wanna be an Australian who's bi and annual too

[@Nerotius95]

Winky face? 🤔

[@HamStrains]

Every Australian explores their Bi side annually via KZbin. 🫡

[@xcastielx]

Every Australian is bi

[@ThePylon2]

Whoa he’s bisexual I didn’t know that

[@gashadokuro_]

In the small mention of the front trunk you had, you forgot the best part. It can crush you finger, yes, but it's designed to close *harder* when met with resistance, AKA A HUMAN FINGER OR BODY PART.

[@Romanticoutlaw]

HUH??

[@Wormswoods]

Yup, they have programmed it so that when it can't close for a reason - say, it's packed too tight, and things are flowing out - the next attempt at closing will be with more force. Which is fine if you're trying to stuff sleeping bags and groceries in, but you can imagine how horribly it can go with anything else xD

[@maybelater1464]

Cybertruck L elevator doors figured out how to open when met with resistance years ago

[@tobiasbayer4866]

What?! That isnt just not having safety features, thats an anti safety feature.

[@Legomaster-jv8ll]

I’d also like to add that most people who tested it (and DON’T own a cybertruck) used a carrot as a stand in for a human finger. CT owners used their actual fingers once they “fixed” it.

[@Naitohana]

My boyfriend and I saw one parked at a store when we were going to a restaurant and I was doubled over laughing at how stupid the thing looked. I thought the cybertruck looked stupid enough in pictures but seeing it in person was just so funny. It looks so so ugly and dumb.

[@tropezando]

I was with my mom when she saw one on the road last month, having never seen one on the news before, and yelled "what the fuck???" at the driver full volume at a stoplight, windows down.

[@DatOneCat]

The Cybertruck needs more polygons. Even cars from old 3D DOS games look better than it.

[@aurorarose6678]

NO LITERALLY i saw my first one irl a few weeks ago and i was like Cackling with laughter, it looks so insanely stupid in person

[@minajones8341]

Same. It’s so ugly! Why on earth would anyone even want one of these?

[@gokuxsephiroth4505]

Careful - breathe on it funny and the owner will lose their warranty!

[@WereScrib]

Correction: It was not 'tested' and found street legal. The US federal system stated that as its essentially a novelty car, they don't really bother testing its safety. Saying if interest increases and it becomes a serious vehicle, it may be tested. Street legality =/= crash safety generally in the US. It's a weird issue with our laws heavily being mandated by state laws. As California isn't interested in destroying their own business, currently, no one is really regulating it locally. To explain: US federal law is very light on many regulations. Individual states within tend to have very different laws. Sometimes this can be a purely local thing. (I.E. Historically Hawaii has specific restrictions other states do not have, but due to Hawaii being, well, in the ocean, and relatively low population, its regulations tend to not effect national regulations. Similarly, you can imagine if Montana had unique car laws, car manufacturers would just not care.) But California, the state that has historically had a robust car regulation board, is large and important enough, that if it makes a decision, the nation has to kind of follow unless it wishes to destroy any chance of market penetration.

[@Phoenix0F8]

that's really cool that me driving around in an actual car has to put up with the safety hazards of some random jackass in his "novelty" car lol

[@MacronsKitten]

I LOVE POLITICAL LOBBYING🦅🦅🦅

[@sari9645]

Thank you for sharing this!

[@zjanez2868]

@@Phoenix0F8 it can kinda make sense for things like prototypes, custom racecars, kit cars or bodywork modification not sure how its allowed for actual production vehicles

[@itsRhodi]

​@@zjanez2868And even then those cars are, 90% of the time, being used for specific purposes on private land (i.e. offroad prototypes being tested in the hills, a NASCAR being transported to a track), while the cybertruck is fully street legal and unregulated. Insane

[@lud3445]

"And I could keep talking about this for ... hours" Aaaand why don't you?? I need more Australian librarian ramblings

[@elbolainas4174]

An hour dunking on Musk's idiocy is an hour well spent

[@declanashmore]

Just a note on the Tesla hardware vs that of other manufacturers. Part of the reason why other chips are so slow is because they need to be extensively tested for being inside a closed off computer inside a car, under a window, in the summer sun. There is this whole standard for it, and Tesla just decided to forego it, leading to... surprise... recalls for computers overheating when all the cooling units are too busy cooling the batteries.

[@AlexWeiner]

Source on the recalls?

[@None-Trick_Pony]

@@AlexWeiner Google the string "Tesla computer overheat recall". I just did, and it returned dozens of articles talking about how 130,000 Tesla units were recalled because the CPUs overheated. I've spent 30 seconds writing this comment, and it's still taken far longer than it did for me to find sources. Have fun!

[@None-Trick_Pony]

​@@AlexWeinerGoogle "Tesla computer overheat recalls". It'll return dozens of articles responsive to your inquiry. It took me ten seconds to formulate the string and type it in. Have fun!

[@gwendalynnwatkins1296]

​@@AlexWeinerIt happened in May 2022, I just googled it

[@caramel9154]

@@AlexWeiner 'After 4 Cybertruck recalls in 5 months, Elon Musk’s Tesla may soon lose more of its luster' on Fortune, written by David Meyer

[@GnuMagify]

12:00 To put into perspective how dumb this "sub-10 micron accuracy" is: A human hair is ~50 microns in diameter. A human red blood cell is approximately 8 microns in diameter. A deviation so small that it's barely visible in a 40x light microscope is apparently "sticking out like a sore thumb". Oh, and an online calculator is telling me that a foot-long sheet of steel will, if the temperature increases by 2C, expand by ~10 microns. So unless the temperature is so strictly regulated during production that there's not even a deviation of 2C, the measurements will already be off.

[@heliumpai7627]

Oh. My goodness. This deserved to get pinned that's insane-

[@leafgreenbeast]

thank goodness there's nothing that could cause thermal transfer during cutting, processing, or assembling the veilcle for this to be an issue! (this is sarcasm)

[@tomdiskin8090]

Sub 10 microns isn’t mind blowing in machining and manufacturing, but even if a part/body panel is within 10 microns doesn’t mean it’ll line up properly if it’s fitted by stevie wonder

[@NiallBoggins]

Well, Musk is a moron, so...

[@samuelglover7685]

The "10 micron accuracy" remark isn't the first time that Musk has revealed (unintentionally, as he's too ignorant to catch himself) that he lacks the technical understanding of any sophomore engineering student.

[@ReelRai]

The reason why Tesla's interiors are so minimalistic and everything has to be done through one screen, is that its much cheaper to have one screen and do everything digitally than have actual buttons and switches

[@chrisjacobsen1659]

That doesn't make it better...

[@canieto1]

You are correct. They had to make the vehicle affordable for it to be adopted and keep the company alive.

[@1123elemental]

​@@canieto1well the vehicle is still not affordable, in fact they just canceled their line of affordable vehicles lol

[@illpunchyouintheface9094]

@@canieto1it’s literally one of the least affordable vehicles you can buy.

[@boo9781]

@@chrisjacobsen1659exactly the point

[@FLancer218]

The chad Toyota Corolla vs virgin Cybertruck

[@lsswappedcessna]

the toyota corolla probably has a higher ungoverned top speed lmfao

[@crowdemon_archives]

​@@lsswappedcessna and it's actually safer!

[@swordofseals33]

​@@lsswappedcessnasure does! lmao Fun fact: The famous Toyota AE-86 was a precursor to the Corolla

[@calebharris292]

​@@swordofseals33 the corolla first came out in 1966. The ae86 was a trim level for the corolla

[@swordofseals33]

@calebharris292 Yo that's even cooler! Thanks for posting, bro

[@alternatealt5900]

Elon is the perfect example of "Just because you're rich, doesn't mean you're competent."

[@Amfortas]

And your achievements?

[@emperorfaiz]

@@Amfortas And your actual argument?

[@TheGallantDrake]

​@@Amfortas yours? How is this relevant?

[@Amfortas]

@@TheGallantDrake I'm not the one pontificating on successful people 😏

[@galaxychill9578]

@@Amfortas _I'm_ not the one defecating

[@dragonseatcheese8727]

I wanna say that as an American, the advertising about it being "bulletproof" is stupid. It seems to be at most to be just below the level of 2A armor. Which is the lowest actual rating of armor. It can only really stop sub-sonic pistol rounds and buckshot, which is AWFUL at getting through things.

[@Gloomdrake]

It can’t even stop a lightly lobbed metal ball

[@thepanpiper7715]

*nods* You’re saying we have to resort to the canon at the top of the stairs loaded with grapeshot. TALLY HO, LADS!

[@Fattts]

It's "bulletproof" enough to be advertised as bulletproof.

[@chaotickreg7024]

​@@GloomdrakeBe fair. It did stop the ball.

[@AJ-yj7fl]

@@chaotickreg7024 The glass didn't. It was supposed to be "thermonuclear blast-proof glass." Ball > Nuke. Somebody ought to tell all the defense contractors, internationally. They will save so much money on this new tech! Maybe we can afford universal healthcare finally. At the very least, we won't have to subsidize Musk's whims with our tax money. He'll be so rich from this ball tech, he won't be able to justify taking tax money. Also, he should really look into replacing the whole truck with a bigger version of the ball. It'll be apocalypse proof for sure then. It could be powered by clumsily pushing against it's inner shell in the direction you want to go. Like a hamster ball. He can call it the MuskRat Ball!

[@thelongestrose]

"Cybertruck will be waterproof enough to serve briefly as a boat, so it can cross rivers, lakes & even seas that aren’t too choppy" - Elon Musk

[@Phoenix0F8]

"Buoyancy? What the hell is a buoyancy?!" -probably elon musk too

[@illpunchyouintheface9094]

If a car has to come with a car wash mode, you know that shit ain’t going into no water

[@genuinelyspoken6611]

Yeah my paper boat is waterproof for just enough time to float briefly in the water

[@chow-chihuang4903]

I think that’s why the battery case is only half-full - the engineers suddenly needed the buoyancy after Elon made that claim.

[@neoqwerty]

@@genuinelyspoken6611 Your paper boat is probably more waterproof than the cybertruck, unless it's tissue paper, which is honestly a comparison that shouldn't have the paper boat come out MORE water resistant.

[@snowboundwhale6860]

I recall seeing someone sharing how the cybertruck will simply close it's doors/ hood on carrots and pointing out it's a health hazard with how it'd do the same to your fingers, and supposedly the official Tesla response was "we've programmed it so if it meets any resistance it'll assume it's just a bag in the way and try to squash it into place", which is possibly even worse since on top of the health risk maybe you don't want the bag squashed either and it just needs a little shifting around?

[@DazeDawning1]

They saw other cars with gentle, dainty closing mechanisms that would barely pinch the finger of a toddler before refusing to close any more and thought that whiffed too much of REGULATION, so of course the only option was implementing the Finger Obliterator 3000 with the excuse that the intent was to crush your belongings as opposed to your extremities

[@user-zb9lv3gh8s]

​@@DazeDawning1that's FREEDOM BROTHER!!!! The freedom to have a vehicle that will perform random amputations...really sticks it to government regulations!!!

[@gwendalynnwatkins1296]

WHAT My mom's car literally just will not close if anything is in the way, bag or person

[@snowboundwhale6860]

​@@gwendalynnwatkins1296 Yeah, and they're made that way due to safety concerns, but seems like Cybertruck chose to disregard those. I imagine there's someone/ a few people in the chain of command for it's development who get annoyed when the boot doesn't just close first time even if something's sticking out, and rather than reflecting on why cars have that feature they assumed it was a problem to be fixed.

[@Veltrosstho]

Elon has people to move his bags. He doesn't understand what "stowage" means.

[@subaru4920]

I don't get why people would humiliate themselves with this car. Most people think it looks like shit.

[@Avendesora]

Eh, people legitimately think the Scion xB looks good, so I'm sure there's a shocking percentage of buyers and potential buyers who actually dig the style. Doesn't feel like a yum worth yucking just because of how the public reacts to it

[@alalvarez7301]

Literally because childish arrogance. One CT muskrat went "I DON' WAN MY CYBERSTRUK DO TO TRUCK STUFF" in the most modern day troglodyte manner imaginable without an ounce of irony or self reflection. Surreal stuff

[@PhileasLiebmann]

No, dude, you don't understand. The rusted to shit, held together with shoelaces and scotch tape look while blaring error messages on a cracked screen is essential for the apocalyptic vibe Elon is going for.

[@jitterbuggs]

when i'm in a recklessly endangering people's lives competition and my opponent is the telsa cybertruck:

[@thepanpiper7715]

…yeah, I’d sit this one out, babe.

[@sari9645]

This made me laugh out loud 😭

[@SlapstickGenius23]

The Tesla cybertruck may be the best take on the Isekai Truck-Kun archetype in decades due to how dangerous and horribly designed it is!

[@SpookyDeerArt]

the whole billion dollar brick truck not moving during a crash reminds me of that old tumblr post where someone posted a pic of a vintage car that was involved in a crash and the modern one it ran into. the modern car was a scrap heap in the front end while the vintage car barely had a scratch on it. guess which driver didn't get injured?

[@BuzzabeelYT]

Can’t wait for the commercial in 20 years, “if you or a loved one drove a cyber truck…”

[@stephenboyington630]

I feel like driving a Cybertruck to get a drink of water at Camp Lejuene on my way to the asbestos factory.

[@DB-su4ke]

I just saw a story on Reddit where a guy was inspecting his Brand New Cybertruck and an exposed part cut a gash open on his wrist. those cars are hideous AND dangerous, what fun!

[@FancyRPGCanada]

8:12 it rains on Venus, in fact, it rains Sulphuric acid on Venus. I would love to see how a cyber truck handles that

[@thepanpiper7715]

With or without the vinyl wrap?

[@None-Trick_Pony]

It doesn't just rain sulphuric acid on Venus. It's a constant downpour of sulphuric acid 24/7. It's so bad it's melted rovers after minutes and heat up the surface so much the only habitable zone is in the upper atmosphere.

[@bigchungus6827]

@@thepanpiper7715 don't think the wrap's gonna make much of a difference at that point.

[@Markm8]

“Is not feature complete” is insane for a car, and its probably the best possible way to explain the car

[@DustD.Reaper]

My understanding of physics boils down to "if you drop a thing, it falls cause gravity" and even I could have told them that driving a hollow brick that doesnt move in a crash is throw you around worse than a badly maintained roller coaster in a sketchy theme park. More evidence for my theory "More money = less inteligence" because eventually they reach the point where, instead of giving it a second look to see if its even a good idea, they just throw more money at it and just expect it to magically work.

[@bethanybrookes8479]

Something my mum always said is that lots of people have an intuitive understanding of physics, because we see it in our day to day. People who are bad at physics aren't actually bad at it, they just struggle to put the numbers to it and remember the names for what's happening. Obviously, these tesla simps are out to prove her wrong.

[@peppermintgal4302]

You didn't hear this from me, but.... engineers who work under Elon Musk avoid involving him in the design process. Why? Because when they do, we get the cybertruck.

[@dawnbreaker1104]

Ah yes the cybertruck! The most appealing car on the planet for someone recently teleported here from 1886

[@adrianomaly1760]

🎉best comment

[@user-cs2en4wl4f]

The apocalypse proof car that gets disabled by a car wash.

[@eribraun92]

6:43 Voice commands also aren’t accessible to Deaf drivers, as both of my Deaf parents have never been able to get any sort of voice detect function to understand them. I’m sure it’d impact other groups of people too, I’d thought I’d mention that this feature would make cars unusable for people who struggle with voice commands.

[@chesspiece4257]

- literally anybody with a strong accent

[@ChaosSolEternal]

I saw one of these while driving one day. We've had a lot of rain this spring and the thing already looked like it was rusting.

[@toomanyaccounts]

the DeLorean manual said to use gasoline to wash it

[@OtakuUnitedStudio]

​@@toomanyaccounts It went from rusty to rusty and flammable.

[@thepanpiper7715]

@@OtakuUnitedStudio WITNESS HIM!

[@canieto1]

They don't rust.

[@toomanyaccounts]

@@canieto1 they do. Stainless steel rusts

[@drunkenhobo8020]

Honestly the best thing about the Cybertruck is how it's exposed how ludicrous American truck regulations are. And I do enjoy how much it's upset truckbros because their truck is no longer the most ostentatious thing on the road. Everybody's looking at the Cybertruck drivers now.

[@EGarza-mk2mk]

Getting looked at in a Cybertruck isn't the flex you think it is

[@noellewiggam5201]

Saw my first cyber truck in the wild and can confirm the sharp angles make it look out of the PS2 graphics era

[@AlterEgo-en2wx]

I think you added an unnecessary 2 there...

[@solarwalkman]

Don't bash the PS2, this is more Game Boy Advance territory

[@crowdemon_archives]

​@@solarwalkman I'd argue it's more Atari

[@spyr0guy]

unrendered vehicle

[@DatOneCat]

Nah man, this is like old 80s - early 90s graphics era. Stuff like Virtua Racer, Stunt Driver for DOS and so much more. Even then, the cars from those games look way more better.

[@tacosarentreal]

He finally remembered his password

[@thefirkman7400]

I think the funniest part about the Cybertruck is that while their 100K "all terrain" trucks were broken down after a mere few miles of being on the road, the owners are still simping hard for their broken down eye sores and calling anyone who has a truck that, you know, works, stuck in the past and not advancing humanity forward or some stupid shit. I enjoy laughing at those clowns as I drive past in my perfectly fine, working 20 year old Mitsubishi I only paid 7 grand for all in.

[@ShockedLogic]

Musk looked at every aspect of a car and asked "huh, I wonder why it's like that?" and instead of learning he decided that actually it was all the other car makers that were wrong.

[@schwarzwolfram7925]

Tech-bros always trying to reinvent the wheel and keep insisting that it needs corners.

[@BlackCanary87]

It's frustrating because when I was a kid, I remember a car company making an experimental prototype where the mandate was to reinvent the car, in the sense that there are a lot things that are designed a certain way just because people are used to them, not because they're the best way to do things. Like the QWERTY keyboard layout versus others that are more efficient. They moved the brake, accelerator, and gear shift to the wheel, made the wheel more ergonomic, moved several engine parts into the floor...I don't remember the details, but it was a really interesting project!

[@HuffdrewPaint]

I ain't seen one yet. But I live in a place where mfs have a colossal pickup to drive to and from their small business where they're very much hated.

[@oizikosandras7249]

I was just surprised the hub caps didn't make the wheels look like they stay still

[@nortalian549]

I’ve seen one. It has the absolute FLATTEST ass. I pointed and laughed

[@gracejordan110]

I’ve seen exactly One and it looks every bit as stupid in person I promise

[@Werewolf.with.Internet.Access]

@@gracejordan110 Same. It was like seeing a big, dumb extremely endangered animal out in the wild. Like seeing a dodo bird irl

[@Ottobon]

Seen multiple, as someone who like the concept it sadly just doesnt work irl. Issues aside the design could work if it was like Tacoma or Ranger sized but its freaking massive, so imagine a Lambo but now its upsized to the size of or bigger then a Denali, none of the angles make sense on a car that big even if the panel gaps werent a thing. Its just a giant shed sized doorstop thing. I think besides the raw size its being that sort of angular and the beltline just being so high, triangles only work with a low beltline, cybertruck meanwhile has massive flat front that doesnt start angling back until like arm or shoulder height roughly for most people. Its main thing irl is just looking insanely plain, like some kit car but not in a good way, huge flat panels will do that Still less ugly then the Y

[@MusiciansRule07]

If anyone expected the Cybertruck to be good after The Window Video, that's on them. Also, why did they expect the same person who actually managed to make TWITTER worse to be the next Henry Ford? You'd be better off putting the 100K (and counting with all the repair costs...) into a woodchipper.

[@TheGallantDrake]

You don't understand. Elon is such a genius that his ideas aren't compatible with the average person! You aren't smart enough to understand!!!!!!!!1!!1!1!1

[@kaasmeester5903]

Twitter seems fine. Some subscribers and advertisers left because "Elon Musk bad". Some things on Twitter have improved. The problem with Elon is that he gets way too personally involved in that company. That is fine if you're running a tech company and you know what you're talking about. Which he does in the case of Tesla and SpaceX; he's made considerable contributions to the technical and engineering side of their products. But Twitter is NOT a tech company; it's a social media company with a large online community, and that's and entirely different beast. One that Elon does not seem to understand at all. Best thing would be to leave Twitter to someone else to run, set the right policies for it, and then leave it alone. But fair enough, the Cybertruck seems to be plagued by issues, though I don't credit all of them as being major rather than isolated issues due to rushed production - far too many people seem overly eager to see the Cybertruck fail. And there are some decisions I'm still shaking my head over, decisions I suspect Elon had a direct hand in. For one: the lack of proper support centers for his cars. Or what about bulletproof windows... that's a choice you're going to regret when your car goes into the drink. With all of that said, I wouldn't underestimate Elon Musk. By all acounts he is a clever guy, and able to weigh in on complex issues in all of his businesses, but he can also be stubborn and over-confident. If the Cybertruck is really that bad (and if it's really his fault) is too early to say... I would hesitate to buy a first run car with a radical new design from ANY car brand.

[@lsswappedcessna]

$100k could get you a hell of a wood chipper, jokes aside. You could start a mulch business with that money and your new industrial grade wood chipper.

[@megapussi]

Its very funny you say that because musk buying twitter is the closest he's ever been to being like henry ford. Henry Ford bought out a newspaper to pump out dozens of articles about how the jews were ruining america. They're both racist conspiracy theorists who bought out the press to push their hateful ignorant beliefs on the masses.

[@YEs69th420]

@@kaasmeester5903 Elon Musk consistently shows how much he doesn't know about anything he talks about. What contributions to Tesla and SpaceX? The ideas we can directly attribute to him are always shit. Actual experts in the fields he parades around in always point out fundamental issues with his claims and he's too stupid to know how obviously bad he is at things.

[@criticalevent]

As soon as I saw people sticking magnets to that thing like it was a Samsung fridge, I knew Elon had cheaped out on the stainless. Magnets should not stick to the special SpaceX 300 series stainless he said it was going to be made out of.

[@HerrDoktorWeberMD]

My favorite thing about the cybertruck is the fact that the whole panel and all the gauges got swapped out for an ipad glued to the inside of a dumpster

[@t1dotaku]

Hust this winter my brother's car broke down, so he thought he might as well try a rental Tesla since he'd otherwise never be able to own one. Well, it broke within a day. As I said, it was winter, as while it didnt snow much it dropped not only below freezing but below l zero quite a lot. Needless to say the battery froze so he then needed a rental car for his rental car. He was pissed since he asked the guy at the rental place if it was be alright to drive during the winter and not once did he mention the issue with the battery. My brother used to think Tesla was cool, now he sees it as a scam.

[@KingKool2099]

"Do not wash the car in direct sunlight??" Should I wash it in the rain?! Should I wash it in my garage? Inside a fumigation tent? What is the alternative here? And what do I do in the rain if it says "Don't leave water on it?"

[@divineruins]

you dry it with your comically large blowdryer of course! what, you don't have one? it came as a $20,000 extra to the cybertruck!

[@kebabruh]

Fun fact: Touch screens are cheaper than typical buttons. So the screens are just an illusion of luxury.

[@anomaly_echelon7994]

But aren't screens more technologically advanced and is easier to be customized? And, Tesla's goal is to make EVs affordable by mass producing them, "Luxury" comes after that.

[@hikaru9624]

​@@anomaly_echelon7994they're still cheaper to manufacture.

[@anomaly_echelon7994]

@@hikaru9624 that's a bad thing? What's your point?

[@hikaru9624]

@@anomaly_echelon7994 I never said it was a bad thing. Just telling you it's cheap crap.

[@schwarzwolfram7925]

@@anomaly_echelon7994 Furthermore, touchscreen controls have been shown to _significantly_ increase the time needed to perform tasks. Time that the driver isn't looking *at the road.*

[@smilingearth5181]

The Cybertruck looks like someone tried to draw an El Camino on an Etch-a-Sketch.

[@None-Trick_Pony]

"Introducing... The Homer!" "$100,000 for that?! What have I done? I'm ruined!"

[@BasketChase98]

The whole point of back to the future’s delorian is that the delorian was a notoriously shit car in the 80’s. There’s even a joke in the climax of the movie where Marty starts to panic because it won’t start. It was clunky and unwieldy and handled terribly, with a frame that at the time was considered ugly, and it only got such a cult following because it was in such a wildly successful movie and if not for that fact it would be doomed to be nothing more than a restoration project for an incredibly small niche of collectors. My point being is that if Back to the Future had been made today, they would’ve used a Cybertruck.

[@schwarzwolfram7925]

The DeLorean at least has better safety standards.

[@michelle7002]

i’m very relieved those hunks of scrap metal most likely won’t be permitted for sale where i’m from, they’re incredibly ugly

[@maybemablemaples2144]

The fact that people saw his Elden Ring build and still thought this man was smart it wild to me.

[@Zhawn7]

I'm curious, can you explain his build? I'm not that knowledgeable of Elden Ring.

[@garyslayton8340]

​@@Zhawn7guy just had a bunch of stats that really clashed with echother

[@kempolar9768]

​@@Zhawn7oh jeez I just had a look, it is BAD. First off he's carrying a staff, 2 swords and 2 shields making him incredibly heavy. Heavy rolling in the game is one of the worst ways you can nerf yourself. He was also using a talisman called a "scoreseals" which raises certain attributes in exchange for taking for damage. They can be good for good players during the early game when your stats are low, however elon was at level 111 making the extra damage taken not worth the bonus stats, also extra damage on top of heavy rolling. Another thing is soft caps, where you can keep leveling certain stats but they give diminishing returns so it's not worth it at all. Elon pumped his intelligence up to level 69 despite I think the softcap being at 60 or so. Might be wrong on that. He also only had 30 vigour, vigour is health. Most players sit between 40-50 vigour regardless of build. So he is fat rolling and can't really avoid damage, taking more damage than other players from the scoreseal and has less health than anyone else while doing it.

[@mottski1]

If you're going for a pure caster, int can be over 60, cause there are some spells that require 70+ int to cast. However, if he's only in the low 100s and has high int but little else, he's probably also not getting good damage out of the big weapons he's lugging around. Even if he used a magic scaling ash of war (im not looking up his build lol), most greatswords/colossal weps/etc scale dex or str primarily. And even with high tier int scaling weapons, as a caster your primary damage is from, yknow, spells, and less from your sword. So it's even more pointless to be fat rolling due to too many weapons disease.

[@maybemablemaples2144]

@mottski1 and the fool has no spell slots.

[@th4tw3irdg1rl]

Someone in my neighborhood owns a cybertruck. I see it occasionally while on my commute. When I do see it, I make sure to take a little detour because I have no desire to share the road with it. I feel safer knowing that monstrosity isnt within 500 ft of me on the road.

[@Frenchfrys17]

You still share the road with 18 wheelers though.

[@HANKTHEDANKEST]

@@Frenchfrys17 They're a) very big, hard to miss and b) driven by people who are held to a higher standard, i.e. truck driver runs somebody over he's far more munted than you or I in a 4-wheeler. Anybody stupid enough to WILLINGLY buy a cybercuck is advertising that they should be avoided.

[@ConifuriousTree]

​@@Frenchfrys17You have to be trained to drive those

[@Frenchfrys17]

@@ConifuriousTree Just like how everyone has to be trained to get a drivers license.

[@quentagonthornton49]

@@Frenchfrys17 In many if not most US states, that's not the case.

[@666kittycat666]

Actually I WILL argue with the idea that this is street legal just like I will argue against leaded gasoline, current government lobbies be damned.

[@bsnow304]

Who's arguing for leaded gas?

[@33link333]

Last I checked the Cybertruck was also not street legal in Europe.

[@HANKTHEDANKEST]

@@bsnow304 Good question--Model T supremacists? Are they a thing these days?

[@bsnow304]

@@HANKTHEDANKEST Henry Ford was a supremacist of a different sort, so I would check them for overlap

[@cowdersoocoop]

this is like the yandere simulator of cars

[@divineruins]

at least the car was actually finished edit: actually no coming back seconds later. i retract my statement this is just like yansim

[@riotwire]

Some dumbass in our city bought one and now our local reddit/snapchat is just constantly people posting pictures of it and everyone is making fun of them lol

[@legojay14]

You should absolutely do a full breakdown. I think people see the common faults and think that's it. But don't catch things like that injury received by the cybertruck driver in the crash? Both his legs were broken. That's where that kinetic energy goes

[@lockette021]

Turning things like the protective layer on your car into a separate little benefit you have to buy is NOT a precedent, I'd like to set

[@deconyus3412]

Ill say it everytime. The Cybertruck is a vehicle made in gmod brought to reality.

[@infernomance]

The most embarrassing part of all this is that Tesla isn't even at the forefront of any EV technology anymore, Chinese EV's are eating their (and a couple other companies, but not as much as the meme company that can't make cars) lunch to a severe degree. It's not a good sign when your government has to step in and double the price of your competition. So it's not even "I'm a tech-head strapping myself to the beta rocket to stress-test new technology", you're just a brand loyalist.

[@luisfreitas4724]

Dude I don't trust chinese EVs for shit. They have all the incentives to lie and there is a shit ton of videos about the QA oversight.

[@bluegem8582]

Tesla absolutely is just the famous early bird who coasts off of past fame thinking it'll indefinitely last

[@StreakyBaconMan]

There is kind of a reason those Chinese EVs are so cheap - if you think Tesla build quality and safety issues are bad, take a look at the build quality and safety issues with Chinese EVs. I'd never choose to drive a Chinese EV, no matter how cheap it was. Not trying to say teslas or the cybertruck are good - I certainly wouldn't want to buy a tesla and you wouldn't catch me even setting foot in a cybertruck let alone driving one. But they aren't nearly as bad quality as a Chinese EV. You're not saving any money buying a Chinese EV for half the price if it's undrivable in a quarter of the time.

[@Doodlesnaps]

Chinese EVs are death traps. There have already been a few famous incidents of people being trapped inside and burnt alive while people outside are unable to help. They're so dangerous, insurance companies in China have stopped insuring them. I literally wouldn't get in one if you paid me.

[@canieto1]

Steer by wire. 48v architecture. Can bus wiring. no one else does this.

[@axelotlee_]

I went to the Petersen Automotive Museum a couple of months ago where they have a Tesla section on the first floor. They also have the first manufactured Cybertruck (the one with the shattered window, sadly they replaced the glass) The Cybertruck itself looked kind of shitty, you could see the imperfection of metal on the outer layer. Kind of looked like it was made out of foil.

[@ziom9867]

Aussie bored librarian starring Ryan Gossling

[@blueluma6759]

My friend has a cybertruck, and I’ve ridden in it. Can confirm, it looks weird and sucks ass. Watching her try and fiddle with the windshield wiper while going 60 is genuinely terrifying. Also, for some reason, there’s gamer lights under the windows. Why? Who knows. Also also, her brother’s ipad SLID INTO THE CAR when he tried to set the ipad up on the little section that divides the back seats from the front ones. They had to take apart the car to get it out. Tldr, the cybertruck is bad, from someone who has driven for a terrifying 30 minutes in one.

[@openmike4559]

You’re jealous because you can’t afford it and her life is better than yours. 🤦

[@gaysquidbowser]

@@openmike4559found the elon musk dickrider

[@Iteration456-8_codename_goblin]

Remember Glass Onion? Yeah that movie was awesome

[@ChillCascade]

Every time he comes back his drip is even more immaculate, he can’t keep doing this

[@None-Trick_Pony]

Having to press inconvenient horrible buttons a bunch of times to make a multi-point turn sounds like an absolute fucking nightmare. Elon Musk's philosophy can be summed up as "if it ain't broke, make it a lot worse."

[@schwarzwolfram7925]

Create the problem. Sell the solution. Literal definition of snake-oil.

[@Cassidy4Days]

Kappa: "You're not real" Me: Disappears in a puff of logic.

[@vampiricn1ght]

Australian library Jesus returns again

[@eon6274]

I saw one drive past me at a red light for the very first time. It was even worse in person. It awakened a feeling, a deep desire to carry around tomatoes to throw at it.

[@WickedPhase]

9:35 Do not wash in direct sunlight is wild

[@notyou6674]

do they make these 30 year old white guy with glasses video essay youtubers in a lab or something

[@jblen]

I feel like the cybertruck is what you get when you give all the money in the world to a guy with a little bit of business sense and some technical knowledge but no engineering knowledge and a fanbase that will forgo their engineering knowledge to please daddy Elon

[@MiloWildfire]

Car guy here In my unprofessional opinion You got everything right ngl

[@Fluffkitscripts]

Material science student here. Most cars’ materials are just as prone to corrosion. THAT’S WHY THEY USE PAINT. THIS PROBLEM ONLY EXISTS BECAUSE DIPSHIT CHEAPED OUT ON THE PAINT JOB.

[@amadeosendiulo2137]

It's not street legal in Europe because the front is just an anti-pedestian weapon.

[@MrGBH]

"The only thing it can reliably do is brake" Wait, no it can't. Oh, you meant break.

[@andrewparsons2391]

Immortan Joe sees cybertruck from a distance. "SHINY AND CHROME!" Immortan Joe examines cybertruck close-up. "MEDIOCRE!"

[@DoctorBiobrain]

Once you realize that Musk doesn’t like driving and wants Tesla to be a tech company this all makes sense. It’s like if the CEO of Fender hated guitars and only liked dubstep. Design choices should be made by someone who likes to use their products the same way their customers would.

[@HarryDirtay]

Lmao. Or, he's acting like a toddler who suddenly "doesn't like" a game because they aren't winning anymore. 😂

[@CaptainCJ97]

There's no reason this vehicle should even allowed on the roads heck it shouldn't even pass safety tests

[@alphamuplays1669]

Saw one in my ohio suburb about a week ago, looked awful and realized if it hit me on my tiny honda bike ide die, and its already hard enough to trust people on the road

[@DarthLego46]

I live in the Seattle urban sprawl, which has an inordinate amount of Teslas. I have seen three Cybertrucks total, each one with a verifiably different driver, and have never seen them past their initial appearence despite one being parked in the parking lot for the apartment complex next to mine. I guess owning a car prone to rust is a bad idea in an area where it rains half the week in the warmer months. I’m surprised that there was an audience for this thing outside of Elon. I get wanting an EV, but there are so many non-Tesla options now. And even if you were still a Tesla fan against all common sense, none of their other cars are anywhere near as disastrous as the Cybertruck.

[@mollyencrypted2488]

Optimus Prime did not die for this.

[@damascus9876]

Further proof that Phoenix is a dystopian nightmare city: I got cut off by one of these monstrosities in traffic while out for lunch today… Edit: I just got past the part where he mentions the stainless steel and battery overheating problems…and the one that cut me off while driving around IN PHOENX: Was Solid Black. That thing is going to COMBUST come this summer. It gets 118 here in July, what the actual HECK was this dude thinking?!

[@Kidobhuan]

I rode next to one on my motorcycle in Texas and all of those things together made me terrified

[@DocTIM-VoidLogic]

ah yes. A real huge beefy big boy truck built tonka tough with the finest of material manufacturing. Able to widthstand the hardhest conditions known to man with 3 MM thick "Space Steel". but also don't let a bird shit on it or it will rust and die.

[@andrejg4136]

If I as a ten year old (so early-mid 90s) drew this truck as a concept for a future car, I'd rightly be mocked as having just watched Blade Runner and just stealing that. Honestly my current 'ideal vehicle' is basically just taking a high-quality hybrid, increasing battery capacity as much as possible, and then having the info-tainment panel just be an info-tainment panel and have everything ELSE function like a normal car has functioned over the last 30 to 40 years.

[@DocTIM-VoidLogic]

@@andrejg4136 my ideal vehicle is a geo metro with a V8 souped up Honda engine. No reason it would just be stupid funny

[@sundown6806]

​@@andrejg4136 Honestly an infotainment screen + normal tactile controls sounds great. Why do manufacturers refuse to have both?

[@None-Trick_Pony]

​@@DocTIM-VoidLogicYou can't! It's a Geo!

[@DocTIM-VoidLogic]

@@None-Trick_Pony iunno if you read the full comment but the joke is the way the truck is marketed versus how it's literally weak to bird shit, a little mud, and getting wet.

[@DaveCM]

And it kills me that the fanboys overlook and justify all of the problems. They just accept it and live with it. If they bought a car from any other manufacturer and it had even a fraction of the problems that Teslas have, they would be losing their minds and declaring it a lemon.

[@mateokovac2642]

Its because they want to be part of the Teslacult.

[@dmac7128]

The Cyber Truck customer - one of Elon's unpaid beta testers. And the best part about it, one has to pony up 100,000 dollars for the privilege.

[@Renostat_]

i saw one irl yesterday omw to a concert w my sister and i giggled and said “look at this loser ass truck” it was wrapped black and looked even more like a bunch of legos put together

[@openmike4559]

If they can afford the trucks, they’re probably doing okay in life. More than likely not a loser.

[@stevenstokes6306]

​@@openmike4559you can be rich and a loser. Elon himself is an example

[@MrJjjakey]

I heard they had a huge list of specs when it was first announced, along with a $40k price point. They doubled the price and cut a ton of the specs by the time it was out.

[@justpassingby298]

4 years? It was meant to come out 4 years ago, the release was for it's... Release. They already delayed it 4 extra years just to make this shit

[@BrainWeird]

9:30 "Do not wash in direct sunlight." I'm gonna lose my goddamn mind.

[@diosrightcalfmuscle4090]

I feel that Mr. Kaiju believes that if he talks enough about Elon Musk then we'll all just forget that Outer Wilds was a thing and that script never existed.

[@CanadianSamsquanch]

Tesla fans in the car community are looked at like Apple sycophants in the tech community. Nothing's ever wrong and they did it best.

[@openmike4559]

Teslas are very good evs. The truck I’m not a fan of. My plaid is amazing. My family have all been happy with theirs, very low maintenance. My plaid is a beast.

[@dilboo]

​@@openmike4559this shit is so funny thanks for being such a fucking dork dude, gave me a laugh fr

[@oizikosandras7249]

I saw one of these things yesterday. The sheer glare coming off the unibody made me wait in the parking lot for traffic to die down. Cause i did NOT wanna risk going blind getting stuck behind or next to that thing.

[@arkorat3239]

Those cleaning warnings sounds like something you'd see on an computer without a case, not an OUTDOORS VEHICLE.

[@kabobawsome]

If you keep setting the first second of the video back with the arrow keys, it looks like he's C3PO.