Encanto & Recovering from Generational Trauma

[@anahi_naya_ledesma]

If you think about it, each gift from the Madrigal Family has the potential to be a shield or a weapon in case the town comes under attack. - Bruno could see the danger with enough time to alert the whole town. - Juliet would have the ability to heal all the wounded and not allow anyone in the town to die. - Pepa could use her power to attack or dissuade those who want to harm them. - Luisa would have the strength to fight against an army. - Isabella could control all types of vegetation, from trees, poisonous, carnivorous or thorny plants. - Dolores could hear the attackers approaching the town, and know their plans in time. - Camilo could infiltrate and serve as a spy or to deceive the enemy. - Antonio would have control of all the animals, and with their help, chase away the attackers. All of the family's gifts have the potential to protect the town from a tragedy similar to the one Abuela Alma and her people suffered in the past.

[@alexdavis-mann8513]

Mirabel is the new general to coordinate all these things supported by Abela as show by the new door.

[@frann8002]

Where is the war AU

[@chicken0w044]

Except Bruno’s gift couldn’t change the outcome, all of his prophecies fulfilled, even if he saw danger there was nothing he could do

[@Whatamidoing813]

Its almost like powers can be used as weapons

[@lawrencevalero8111]

@@chicken0w044 not really. its more about the people who dont want to change than bruno setting things in stone.

[@kevindoris4241]

My generational trauma is simple. my Grandmother grew up in an abusive house she in turn abused my Mother who in turn abused me and my siblings. Sadly My own mother was not misguided like Abuela but was more a complete monster. Which is why I loved this movie so much. It has such a good grasp on the trauma people go through and the apology is such a pure wish fulfillment ending. As a 15 year old I would have given anything to have my mother tell me that I had not hurt the family and I did not make her life a living hell.

[@BenDeHart]

I’m sorry to hear that. I agree, the movie is definitely a happy ending that isn’t possible for everyone. I hope you’re finding family elsewhere ❤️

[@saigie3908]

I am going through the same thing except I’m 16 rn, & I want to get rid of it, but I have siblings who is harboring that abuse & becoming abusive towards their siblings (including me)

[@alicianieto2822]

Abuela is a queen full of love that I feel only people who have actually traumatized parents appreciate, don't you think?

[@baku2461]

@@alicianieto2822 my mother came from generations of abuse and built up our family on her own to try and escape it, however, her trauma caused some parenting behaviours that were harmful for us. As adults she has acknowledged the harm she did, but as you said, she was a matriarch so full of love and her own trauma was the real issue. Her love got us through even when her trauma was tearing us apart. We have worked hard as a family to build a new foundation of happy, healthy relationships.

[@Skyra-1992]

I basicly have the same story, ended up having to cut ties with absolute everyone who is blood related to me, including my sisters who were like me suffering from this gen trauma. You can only do so much as one person. You can drag a horse to water but if it isn't willing to drink you'll have to walk away eventually. As the oldest one feeling the most responsibility most of the time, espacially when i had to be more of a mother than sister to them, this choice was so painfull. The last time i heard any information about them i understood each of them broke ties with mother and father, going their own way. I can only hope they find what they need to heal from all the shit. Thanks for reading ^_^

[@Rosemont104]

As much as I appreciate the grandmother realizing she's wrong and changing herself, I would also love Disney to put forth a film that actually allows the child to break away and find her own family, and not in the classic "run away from your wicked stepmother" kind of way.

[@ijs733]

Or him

[@Abraham-gf1oi]

Exactly, the entire ending was rushed and no closure was given because "everything's okay, magic back"

[@dafnik3477]

Since I saw the movie, all i do is analyze it again again in my head... it felt weird that a movie that goes so deep into trauma will just have a happy ending like "forgive your toxic relatives and live happily ever after all together". And then an idea hit me. It doesn't. The family Madrigal is not a family. Is one person. Every "member" is a part of the same self, that carries all the different traumas and behaviors caused by trauma, that a person could have in their life, and take all those roles at various times in their life. Mirabel is the same self, that can finally see, accept and love all those broken parts of her self, and be free and whole.

[@HelenaK93]

@@Abraham-gf1oi I actually have to disagree - the ending does give closure to the main issue of the story: their family was falling apart, their home literally cracking and coming undone due to Abuela's rules and expectations of the family. The ending shows Abuela seeing the hurt she had caused her family and so they all set about to build their home back up again together. This time everyone does what they can while also admiting their flaws and supporting one another (like when Luisa admits almost guiltily that she sometimes cries and her sisters reassure her that it's okay cause they cry too + hug). It is only then that "the magic comes back" cause the magic lays in the family being happy, safe, healthy and thriving together once again

[@tudoraragornofgreyscot8482]

@@Abraham-gf1oi I can’t stand people like you who want Abuela punished. Stop projecting your own experiences onto her that aren’t there.

[@mp_1231]

"If this short made you cry, you're about to be going through it with absolutely no mercy." Yes exactly. You see me. Thank you.

[@humanii9037]

Exactly this.

[@mnels5214]

My perspective is, if it isn't emotionally abusive, it's just not Disney/Pixar film. Those things are brutal. Ditto the Seymour episode in Futurama. Animators are just so mean.

[@judewatts6942]

If there's one thing that I have to critique the movie, its how rushed some of the conclusions were. Especially for Bruno. For me personally, his issue is the most concerning since his own self worth in the movie has become very unhealthy and it was a chance to show that kind of character in a Disney movie. Bruno throughout the entire movie left not because of his own betterment but rather of his own conclusion that he is the problem. He has no problem in taking the blame for everything and as well as apologizing to everyone regardless of who is in the wrong. He has wants too but never enough to stand up for himself. In the end its all about his family. Its such an irony. He may have left but his reason is from a form of love. Yet, he has not considered that leaving affected him and the family in a negative way as well. He never saw how important his role in the family was. I just wish there was a scene of self validation that he got because it obviously keeps him up at night with the eye bags under his eyes.

[@elianwolfert3879]

Totally agree, I wish abuela had apologized for pushing away her only son. :(

[@chumplafayette9561]

What about the part in the "All of You" song when Abuela reintroduces him to the family, looks right in his eye and says, "The miracle is you, not some gift, just you."

[@tobimisa]

@@chumplafayette9561 that's not really an apology, especially bruno has heard everyone continue to avoid talking about him and blame him for years. it was never just abuela, though abuela is a root. nothing indicates that they actually learned the lesson, that bruno had never actively Hurt anyone rather just been the messenger, but instead are deciding to look past the bad they see in him because he matters beyond his gift. and it's a good first step but it's still a harmful position for bruno to be in.

[@alonnamarie5134]

They should've made this a series like the hobbit or something lol

[@CatGold5047]

Bruno even takes responsibility for Maribel. Even coming out of hiding, he was doing it for his family. Then again, Bruno actually telling everyone why he did what he did and "your brother loves you!!" to Pepa, actually speaking what he thought, was so powerful to me. I got the feeling that Bruno never got to speak. Just deliver prophesies.

[@misseli1]

"The thing that Encanto nails is that it doesn't excuse or forgive abuela's actions just because of the trauma. It allows Mirabel the chance to offer her forgiveness, because abuela recognizes and acknowledges what she did was wrong." Thank you! So many people fail to understand this and think the film was unfairly trying to justify abuela Alma's errors.

[@punyashloka4946]

And it also shows that Abuela is also a human being regardless of what she went through.

[@savannaharmstrong5185]

My mom was the one who broke the cycle after several generations in her family. But, as I’ve found, when the abuse gets heavy enough, it takes more than one generation to break. Her desire to protect us all from the abuse she suffered resulted in expectations of perfection for all of us. This movie hit me so hard. Luisa and Isabela both rang so true to my life. For all the effort she put into breaking the abuse cycle, she couldn’t wipe it all out, and I find myself struggling to keep it up for another generation - to tell my kids it’s okay to make mistakes, to not overreact when they mess up, and much harder, to believe mistakes are okay in myself.

[@brittany1049]

Same here. It’s hard, you can see where they try and you’re grateful, but you can also see where they fail and it hurts so much more than if they just didn’t try at all. I’ve gotten mad at my mother many times over the years when she does something to me and my siblings that was done to her. The fact that she knows better and tries to be better makes that failure more infuriating, sometimes.

[@ncrveterantrooper361]

I understand you!

[@spacepear9403]

this is SO true, even though my parents started to break the cycle, it has so many layers, it’ll take more than one generation.

[@cgonz777]

I never thought of it that way, but you hit the nail on the head about it breaking within generations. As a mother, I'm trying my hardest not to be like mine, yet I find myself losing my temper easily at times. Where I differ is that I recognize it and apologize to my kids and try to explain things. I try to be open and honest with them, which was something I never had growing up. I feel like my kids know they can come to me for anything; that is also something I never felt. However, I do see my oldest starting to have a very short temper. I just hope that we can both learn to control ourselves better in time.

[@ClassicDepravities]

Abuelita grew up impoverished in mexico, and only came to the states when she married my grandpa. my family's generational trauma comes from the anguish of losing our own Tio Bruno. Uncle José took his own life when my mom was 12 or 13, and we NEVER talk about it. it affects how my own mental illness is treated.

[@GiantPetRat]

A number of people have criticized this film for being another formulaic Disney diversion, to which I long to respond with "Did we even watch the same movie here??". Rarely has a kid's film portrayed its characters with such depth, nuance, and relatability. Not only that, Encanto chose to not just focus on Mirabel's problems and make her another Cinderella, but instead to addressed how life's pressures were bearing down on all of the family members. That is some seriously mature writing! I do agree that the songs may have a derivative quality to them, but they are more than servicable, work beautifully to further the film's messages, and don't feel unnecessary or pulled out of the composer's ass to me the way that most musicals' songs do.

[@jeryannejane288]

I just watched Encanto as well just yesterday and someone whose passion is about growing and healing, I also saw the theme of generational trauma clearly. (I'm reading and watching anything that relates to my movie analysis and review now because I'm obsessed with the movie'sportrayal of a very important topic we need to be discussing as a society now) Here's my take on it: It is a perfect movie that depicts trauma and healing. Movie starts with Abuela telling little Mirabel about how the candle light saved her and her kids after losing her husband along with her homeland. This already tells us about Abuela's focus. It was a traumatic event and she was saved and protected by the candle which represents the survival coping mechanism. This is how trauma happens, by developing immediate protective responses that we then keep for the rest of our lives until acknowledged and confronted. Abuela's focus from the moment she survived was keeping what kept her safe- the magic candle, the casita, and its gifts. This is why when Mirabel didn't receive a gift, she was easily neglected and even more, resented. Mirabel not receiving a gift is the a wake up call for her but she didnt looked within, instead she started blaming Mirabel for the failing of the magic. How Abuela's trauma got passed on to the next generation is by instilling that their identity and worth are based on their gifts. Next scene was Mirabel introducing her family even if she was really asked about herself. Because everyone was conditioned to associate themselves with their gift and Mirabel didn't get any, she already didn't feel like she belongs nor that she is enough as she is- even if her mother keeps on reminding her all the time. A first, in her song, she was avoidant, in denia, and convincing herself that she is still part of the Family Madrigal even if she didn't really feel like she is. Telling herself she is fine. Not being honest to herself. That was evident in the family photo, she was left out and she then admitted to herself that indeed she is not okay. (This is when the house/magic started falling apart. Remember the house represents the conditioned protective layers we have as a way to survive.) So when she first admitted her emotional truth, the protective shell is now in question. A catharsis begins. Everyone is worried including her because they didn't realize yet that they've been living under the roof of safety which all limited them as well. Later we find out that Luisa feels extremely under pressure and that she feels worthless if she can't be strong and of service and that Isabel is also not being completely herself because she has to be controlled and perfect. These are all revealed when Mirabel also confronted them and listened to them when they sang their truths too. Both limited to the expectations because of their "gifts". Even if not all characters talked about it, they were all carrying the burden of expectation, to be helpful to the community, to keep things in place, to make the family proud etc When we are in survival mode, we are safe but we are not completely living, we are not thriving. Bruno is a symbol of a catharsis as well. His gift was not considered useful because it involves dark visions and because the family Madrigal only wants to be "strong and magical" when he started talking about things they consider negative, he became an outcast too and the song about We don't talk about Bruno is a about the dismissal of the shadow self or any uncomfortable feelings. Everyone thought Bruno left but he never did, like suppressed emotions. When the house completely collapsed it was when Mirabel confronted Abuela directly that she is the reason of the house breaking, because of her expectations for everyone else. She tried so hard to keep the house together, to keep herself safe but it is not sustainable as everything that is built from the foundations of fear. Mirabel spoke of the truth and at the end of the film, we see Abuela going back to the place where it all started- the root cause of it all. As she said, she never came back there since she lost his husband, this is such a good way of showing how a lot of us really cling to our defense and survival mechanism because confronting the truth of our pain is sooo difficult. Mirabel represents truth, connection, and the healing process- the breaking of old patterns and creating a new foundation. She confronted her feelings and helped others do too and with that, they all healed and built something better, knowing the truth and being together. Abuela kept herself, the family, and the village safe for so long but she tried doing it all on her own but Mirabel opened up, asked for help, confronted the uncomfortable, invited everyone to look within, and come together as one. Mirabel, along everybody, created a new home with foundations of courage and truth. At the end of the film, they built a new house all together and I also love how the community helped too. We heal as a community.

[@anyas8714]

Very apt. I appreciate you. Gracias.

[@nicholepsaintvil887]

Spot on!! ♥️

[@Raquel96]

I love this comment so much, you really bring the deeper levels, that many of us feel subconsciously, to light

[@suchendelokidottir5673]

"for those in the LGBT community, those who leave their religion, etc" You know, i got through all the reviews and analyses without a single tear. Then you stabbed me in the heart. 😆 I now have to sit down and work through this because my subconscious is NOT going to let this go until i do this

[@camilogonz9062]

Being told that reality upfront feels like being stabbed for sure

[@Skyra-1992]

Hope you got through that, the healing process is not pretty as you probably already know. 😅🤣 oh well, gotta do what you need to do right?

[@quemsouleu8581]

I really, really liked how they've protrayed abuela throghout this movie. As a brazilian lgbt person who was raised by a woman torn by the trauma of being a woman raised in the countryside during a violent dictactorship, I could see my mother so much in abuela. Just remembering that scene when abuela realizes she's been hurting her precious familly by trying so hard to protect them from the hardships she herself went through at a young age gives me goosebumps. My mother also had to let go of the ghosts from her past (which doesn't mean she forgot them) to go through a slow, possibly painful but beautiful and rewarding process of change. We watched Encanto toghether and toghether we cried because it was like watching our own lives on the screen. This is what we call good representation, folks. I imagine that a lot of latino moms were also able to see themselves in abuela and hopefully that helps them heal too. Edit: needless to say, but best Disney movie ever.

[@ActuallyGwengo]

My dad actually broke the cycle of generational trauma. My grandfather had extreme anger issues and would take it out on my dad and his siblings. He drank a lot and would go nuts at times when he was drunk. It developed my dad an intense fear of watching what he said and he still has it to this day. My great great grandfather was a war veteran. And was also really stressed and angry he’d go drunk and force his kids (my grandfather) to pretend that they were his old friends in war. And if they stopped he’d go nuts on them. My dad however knew what he felt like and how it was wrong. So when he got me and my brother he promised to never be the same as his dad was. He’s had his moments but he rarely gets mad, he’s actually really chill and funny and honestly the best dad. Watching encanto really made me realise how lucky i am, and made me feel bad for my dad and grandfather. Honestly amazing Movie.

[@sarahfeng]

thanks for giving us a space to discuss the movie like this, it means a lot. i literally just finished watching the film. i have never ever cried at a movie before - this one had me weeping in the first 10 minutes. the moment abuela sang "we swear to always help those around us and earn the miracle that somehow found us" i teared up. my grandma died almost 3 years ago, and i see her reflected so much in abuela, so much so that the depiction of her backstory in the movie physically hurt. she grew up in extreme poverty in china, famine-stricken, always ill, working in a cigarette factory at 9 years old and later living through the cultural revolution, nearly losing her husband at that time. she suffered so much and worked so hard so her children could have a slightly better life. my mother eventually came to america and had me, and then my grandma came here too, to america, to help take care of me. not speaking the language, not knowing anyone, isolated from her siblings back in china. she only had my grandfather, me, and my mother. but she was the one who gave my family a chance at a better life. she was the one who kept my mother and aunts and uncle safe and held the family together even when we were separated by vast physical distance. even in my mind now, i see her as this immovable, indomitable pillar of strength, weathered and worn but still standing tall, despite how small and frail she was in her final years. she always sacrificed so much for us. and we wanted to make her proud, to show that her sacrifices were worth it. i'm sort of the "failed investment" of my family, so to speak. a waste of time. my family had high expectations of me that i couldn't live up to, so i've always understood why they're disappointed and frustrated. i get it, the love mirabel and bruno have for their family despite being outcast from it. the gratitude and respect everybody has for abuela, even when her expectations are unreasonable and she fails to acknowledge what she has in front of her. in the end, i could never make my grandma proud, but i like to believe that i made her happy. sorry for rambling so much, i know it's only tangentially related to the topic of the video. it's just that this movie made me miss her, plain and simple. i hope i was able to do for her what mirabel did for abuela.

[@xxchesire_catxx8176]

“in the end, i could never make my grandma proud, but i like to believe that i made her happy.” Holy shit dude that was beautiful

[@MrAlen6e]

Your an amazing writer btw beautiful explanation

[@sylvre5067]

I got teary-eyed reading this

[@armandogutierrez5301]

Thank you for sharing !! China and Colombia are far from each other yet I see my abuela in yours ain’t that something ❤️💯

[@kayoh30_]

unironically hit me like a truck, i dont know why but god damn ❤

[@PinayGrl926]

I move out of my family home, mainly to get get away from my toxic father. I was constantly being told that I should try to communicate with him. But the problem is, no matter how many times I visualized the confrontation in my head, I know that what I want to say to him won't do anything because he is not willing to change for his daughter.

[@BenDeHart]

That's a hard place to be, hope you decide the best move for yourself.

[@PinayGrl926]

@@BenDeHart Thank you

[@the.lbd.diaries]

The most unrealistic part of Encanto wasn't the gifts of the Madrigals, but the grandma apologizing. I'm someone who's enduring the effects of intergenerational trauma and I found the film to be too idealistic. That doesn't make Encanto any less important. It helped open up this conversation. As someone from a conservative Asian country, it's bittersweet that the only way for me to break the cycle of intergenerational trauma is by leaving my family and basically cutting all ties with them. I want my future children to have a better future.

[@anouksurmenian4257]

Armenian diaspora descendant here, this movie *talked* to me like no other animated movie did before… and their runaway scene wrenches my heart every time… but as many people said, the most unrealistic part of the movie wasn’t the magic, it was their Abuela recognizing her wrongs, apologizing and changing her ways 😅

[@TheLeah2344]

I’m black. I have slavery and segregation in my past and I still see some how it still affects us. Colorism and Misogyny is an example of that. I also was the oldest one so the responsibility fell on me. My mom pressured me to be a lawyer. My family started to hate me because my grandma would brag about how I did well in school and how I graduated early. I also experienced abuse from my mom. My mom also experienced abuse so she in turned abused me. Anytime I made a mistake she would call me names and even hit me. I was afraid to make mistakes because of the abuse I faced. My mom was also mad that I decided to rebel and not become a lawyer. I also experienced racism at school and at my job but I felt that my experience wasn’t nearly as bad as my grandmas experience who went through segregation so I tried not to complain about it. My father was not in my life and he kept making excuses on why he couldn’t be there yet my mom tells me I need to be the bigger person and keep trying to connect with him. My family are also religious and homophobic. I was victim blamed for being sexually assaulted while my younger brother was treated like the black sheep for being gay. My brother left. Also many people may shame me for this but I decided to separate from my family because my family will never change.

[@laurenb4182]

Sending love and support 🙏🏼 I’m sorry you have had to go through all of that 🥺

[@jjaa_joyjoyartist]

I'm glad you know when enough is enough!

[@DanielGarcia2014]

You did right separating from those who harmed you in any way. Distance will ease the pain and give you perspective to be able to understand why your family could not treat you the way you deserved (maybe they thought they were doing the right thing?). Best for you is to forgive them (heal your trauma) and go on with your life. Maybe they will be able to grow, maybe they won't, that's fine. Also, I hope you keep the connection with you brother.

[@centerfold8]

You have to do what’s best for you. That generational trauma caused by racism is very real!

[@CatGold5047]

Sometimes separation is exactly the right thing to do. Good on you for exerting the strength to do something so powerful.

[@laurisawitch0707]

I am a scapegoat in an abusive household. Both my parents are drug addicts with multiple mental illness. My mom died by suicide. My dad is in the hospital from a spinal infection caused by IV heroin. I was raised by my grandparents who abused me like they did him. I've been in therapy for a few years and messing with meds/depression treatments for many more. I am applying for social security disability and about to start ECT treatment Monday. But I feel like I narrowly and clumsily escaped the fate my parents had. I'm not dead, I'm not abusive, I'm not on recreational drugs, and I have a loving relationship. Wish me more of that

[@keeferbb]

Thank you. It left me with much to think about as a parent and my own parents..... and a few tears.

[@dehartid]

Wow Keith, it hits hard but in a good way. I have not thought about this much, at least not in this way.

[@adzdrawss]

i’m not a parent yet but i can see my family and especially my dad in this. his mom wasn’t the nicest person to him growing up so now he’s doing the same thing to us that his mom did to him. i didn’t even realize that that’s what generational trama is until this video

[@ijs733]

As the oldest sibling in my family I have had a lot of responsibility put on to me and expectations that force me to break down. While responsibility is a good thing, I feel like the inability to say no has left me jaded and under a lot of stress.

[@fearthechicken1]

Ben, I am deeply moved by your beautiful creation. I am profoundly grateful and proud that you are my son. I thank you for your forgiveness and understanding. As a recovering alcoholic, (4 1/2 years sober), I have come to know how weakness is my superpower , and how trying to wear a super hero cape can lead to a lot of damage. I lean into the truths of the 12 steps everyday. I am grateful for our “given” family and the commitment we are making to continually find each other. I love you my dear son… I am and have always been grateful for the gift who you, and marvel at the gifts you have and are diligently mastering and giving back to the world. No capes needed darling.

[@puzzledtoby]

as a middle child I was more of the scapegoat for my parents than someone keeping them together

[@BenDeHart]

That’s rough buddy :(

[@puzzledtoby]

@@BenDeHart yep :(

[@steph.li3]

Same

[@Duiker36]

You might underestimate how useful a scapegoat is for keeping people together. Not that it's a good thing either way.

[@khadijahclark9693]

Generational trauma can break or make you, and I'm so grateful that Encanto delved into that. I saw my own family in the film and it spoke to me in so many ways. It inspired me to have difficult conversations with my family- and I'm grateful.

[@TheMamilinda89]

My trauma is two fold: as a 1st generation immigrant, education was so severely pushed on me that I am now in a precession I don’t love. I wanted to go to beauty school but that wasn’t good enough for my parents so now I’m in education. I can’t quit or change because of all the sacrifices they made. Another trauma is that I changed or rather stopped believing in their religion. They nearly disowned me after this. This is an ongoing point of contention with us.

[@BenDeHart]

You’re in the midst of your journey, I hope you find good resolutions no matter what they are.

[@berilsevvalbekret772]

Maybe try to be brutally honest with them? You are an adult now you can make you own decisions. I hope if nothing else you can find a family that can accept you for you.

[@starry-eyedatstarryskies1797]

Every time I watch Encanto two parts in particular always get me- when Mirabel sings Waiting on a Miracle, and where she finally realizes what she contributes will never be good enough for Alma. I straight up cried in the theater when I saw this for the first time, that feeling of never being enough for someone you love really struck a chord with me. I have a complicated relationship with my own mother, but this reminded me of when I was going to college. She wanted me to be a nurse, but I knew right away I would never be able to stomach that line of work. It was always just the two of us when I was growing up, and whenever she got sick I had to be the one to take care of and be there for her, even in elementary school, and I always hated that feeling of having someone rely on me but I have no idea what to do or how to help make things better. I ended up going for an art degree instead, which caused a lot of tension between us as she didn't see it as something I could make a future out of. While I ultimately enjoyed my college experience and gained an awesome friend through it, those early memories of it are tainted by arguments and me thinking everything would've been better if I had just done what my mother wanted. It's been years since then and now I'm living on my own. I'm not really putting my degree to use, but I have a job and a decent place with free wifi lol. I'm satisfied with where I'm at even if she isn't, but I think the space has helped improve our relationship.

[@Valandar2]

To the people who think the ending was "cheap", or "rushed" ... In all honesty, that was the only way a theatrical release movie COULD have ended without being distinctly NOT for kids. There just is not the time in the typical movie length to show all the slow healing, occasional setbacks, crying jags, and out and out fights that would happen during the time it would take to fully heal. One could assume they weathered the worst of it and got thier biggest issues out during the time that they were actually rebuilding the home, but even that is more than a little rushed. But, unless you wanted an unhappy or unsatisfying ending, something that pretty much you don't do in a children's/ young teens movie, it was the only way to end it. The climax, dramatically speaking, was the fight that ended with Casita falling apart. To go on any farther than they did, in terms of time, would have dragged, and DRAGGED, enough for a totally different movie, which would have been hated and refiled. Instead of complaining about that, take it for what it is - that, sometimes, people can admit they were wrong, even if it takes a literal crumbling of their home around their ears to force them to. Not everyone can, but if they can, then a relationship might be able to be saved.

[@sandyzuniga1]

“It isn’t perfect”, “but neither are we”- Abuela and Mirabel from Encanto ❤️

[@jedigandhi]

Thank you so much for posting this; I cried as much as I did/do every time I watch the film. (Six times and counting now). I'm a Chicano (third-gen Mexican American) whose abuelo and bisabuelos were indigenous Mexicans; they fled the violence of the Mexican Revolution after my bisabuelos' brother was lynched by the federales. Soooo much of this movie spoke to me - the narrative of fleeing war; the ways in which PTSD are transmitted from surviving horrors (and avoiding future ones); the burden of being the oldest (Luisa's and my stories aligned perfectly); the blame of being the "black sheep" (Bruno's and my brother's stories aligned); coming from a family of TRULY EXCEPTIONAL individuals and feeling like you are constantly trying to live up to their standards and expectations (Isabela's and Mirabel's and my stories aligned scarily); seeing how alcoholism and emotional/physical abuse can be unconsciously transmitted through generations.... This movie FUCKED ME UP, bro. Like, "Coco" got me real good (seeing my culture represented so beautifully was amazing), but "Encanto" got me even harder, and I can't stop re-watching it. I think it's because it dives even deeper into that generational trauma stuff that sooooo many Chicanes, Hispanes, Latines, Mexicanes, etc. have experience with, and it means so much to have that validated and to see that it doesn't HAVE to continue. Anyway...I really appreciate you making and sharing this video, carnal.

[@siljeborgan4531]

Hey I just wanted to say thank you for this video because it opened my eyes to something that I hadn't thought of regarding Encanto. For me the movie also showed a small but important part about being disabled in todays society. Maribel is disabled because she does not have the same powers that her family and village expected her to have. Her family loves her very much and tries to include her in the family but are not always successful, and Mirabel feels that in her soul. She tries not to resent her family but she does, for everything that they can do and not her. As a wheelchair user myself i felt that in my heart. The town is also doing what many strangers do when they meet somebody who is disabled. They can't understand how Mirabel can be happy without powers and still call herself a Madrigal. So they pester her about her powers (They being the kids and that is fine, because they are kids and our allowed to be curious) and it puts Mirabel in a tight spot, trying to push the other familymembers before her because they are "normal" and she is not.

[@fabianshedenhelm2986]

My generational trauma came from my mom not getting any sort of love or compassion from her parents, their alcoholism, and drug use. My fathers side was also drug use, but also discriminating against others, both sides enforced gender roles. It has such a good grasp on trauma people go through. Sadly my parents still go against me as a trans man, and I don't get enough love from my mother. I try to be as strong as I can be to push through this and to help my siblings out, and my friends out pushing back my own fears as well.

[@tabletopbro]

Expired peanut butter holding the sandwich together is such a great metaphor. This was a really well done video. I haven't seen Encanto (bro I saw Ratatouille for the first time like three weeks ago) nor have really been exposed to the concept of generational trauma but this was definitely an eye opener to both. I don't think I've experienced it directly firsthand, probably because my mother was HELL BENT on not repeating the mistakes her abusive parents made when she was raising me. However, the one aspect of the video I REALLY related to was when you talked about your siblings being doctors and lawyers and you just being some jabroni who makes videos on the internet. While I grew up an only child, my childhood friends -- who were basically my brothers -- both went on to get PhD's in like aerospace engineering and physics, while I ended up working in a bike shop and making marketing videos for people. Even though my parents fully support what I do and are proud of me, there's still an aspect of ego that kind of stings.

[@BenDeHart]

I’m really glad your mother made such an effort to break the cycle! And it definitely sounds like we’ve had a similar journey with taking a different career path than traditionally expected ones

[@Yawninggate]

Watching Encanto made me cry, and at first I couldn’t really place why. I chalked it up to the ending being so sweet and seeing the characters heal from their traumatic situations. It was only until after I thought about it more, seeing myself in the same roles as some of the madrigals like Luisa did it really click for me. And I’m in a little of a tight spot at home right now, being the oldest, and having all this pressure on me to be successful when it’s forced. Then I look at how it’s starting to affect my step sisters and how it’s affected me. I want so desperately to help them out I just can’t seem to get my parents to cooperate to realize their mistakes. Something I wish they would’ve seen when watching Encanto.

[@jjaa_joyjoyartist]

No matter how much you try, you can't force someone to change, and it's hard to try to make them accept that they're doing something wrong in the first place. It's instinctual to want to help, but you can only do so much before you end up hurting yourself.

[@humanii9037]

Generational Trauma is everywhere. Not only Encanto was fun to watch with catchy music but it touches on things that some people never explored because it can be difficult to process. I love that people are talking about it more. So thank you for this video✨

[@elizabethbare4208]

I totally relate to you. My family has so much generational trauma on both sides, and my experience was absolutely exacerbated by immigration, the Great Depression, wars, and major losses and how all that affected my grandparents especially. It’s something I’ve been trying to piece together… The movie left me both triggered and validated.

[@PoeticProse7]

There's an episode of a show called 'God, the Devil, and Bob' that talked candidly about generational trauma that I think you would love. In it, Bob's father dies and he decides to go to hell to give him a piece of his mind only to find out that he actually went to heaven. Bob is confused because his father was abusive, but God talks to him about how his father 'passed along a softer punch' and wasn't even nearly as abusive as his own father and grandfather were. It doesn't excuse abuse, but it does shine some light on how Bob made the decisions to be a better father because of things his father taught him. It's an underrated show and a truly touching episode.

[@starmarie5444]

My mom grew up in a house on a reservation where poverty, sexual assault, racism, and violence was constant. She was SA’ed and when she told her mom she was told to get over it bc it happened to all of them. Along with that my uncle had been put in a grown man’s prison for self-defense but was tried for murder. I’m lakota so if you know anything about that you know we’ve faced a lot of generational trauma: Wounded knee massacre, protests that turned violent with the police, etc. My dad was on the other side if things. He grew up in the 60s and 70s during the civil rights movement. His dad was a police officer that was put out in the protests and where my dad lived, police officers had been killed. So seeing everything happening on the news he was rightfully scared of losing his dad, which he thankfully didn’t. He also was in high school when they were bussing black students to white schools. So he had witnessed a lot of fights fueled by racism. He told me one got so bad a black student was hospitalized bc a white student repeatedly slammed his head into the brick wall outside. My parents met and had my siblings and I. They divorced and my mom ghosted us after she lost custody. To make a longer story short, my mom is homophobic and sexist and my dad is racist. My dad is learning and growing but my mom refuses to see she’s done anything wrong and perpetuates a cycle of gaslighting and abuse . :/

[@poisonmist13]

I relate a lot with Mirabelle for a different reason. As a person with an invisible disability I’ve felt a lot like there is something missing in me. I can manage but I can’t “shine” like the rest of my family. Like I’m missing a gift. Sometimes I feel like my family secretly resents me for being less competent then others.

[@ssun190]

The most unrealistic thing in this tale of magical house and gifts is that an 80-year-old head of the family would actually admit her own mistakes to her children instead of the myriad of self-justification that she used to justify her dictatorial actions her entire life.

[@claudia-7917]

Generational Trauma has been a big part of my life since, sadly, my family is purely polish AND Catholic Christian. My great-grandparents were young adults when WW2 started and my grandmothers were barely 7 and 9. My great-grandfathers enlisted in the german army since Silesia at the time technically belonged to germany. One of them went through a gulag and the other one vanished in action. My grandma's both recounted stories from when they had to hide from Nazi's, were threatened at gunpoint by Russians or just witnessed atrocities. Add to that the Christian catholic traditions they were expected to keep going. My mother was a very strict woman, she cared a lot about looks and our family's face, what we wore, how we acted and what grades we got. I remember because I was unusually smart for my age, my mother forced me to learn all day. If I came home with anything lower than an A she would ignore me and look at me with that disgusting disappointed face. I felt trapped and the weight of expectations broke me at age 12 when I was diagnosed with depression. I had self harming issues. She called me ungrateful and spoiled. Years later when I tried to talk with her she told me that my grandfather beat her because she got a B. Encanto is the best Disney movies in years. It isn't a forced representation trash movie or a cashgrab. Its a genuine art piece about how trauma affects your loved ones if you keep letting it grow and take hold of you.

[@atlas6188]

My nana comes from two poor farmers out in the Australian outback, abused by her parents and nuns at her Catholic school she reenacted her trauma onto my mum, who in turn treated me the same way. Paired with a dad who grew up with a schizophrenic mother who was in a cult and stabbed him when he was 8 years old. My family is falling apart and it's easy to feel like I'm the only one who wants to let the dust settle. But hopefully I can break the cycle here, and make sure my kids won't have to grow up like I did

[@OceanTree]

What is the difference between people who went through traumatic experience but could break the cycle, and those who can't?? (sorry if this doesn't make sense, English isn't my first language)

[@jjaa_joyjoyartist]

@@OceanTree I'm not qualified to speak on trauma, but in terms of change it begins when the person who wants to change awknowleges that there's a problem and takes steps to fix it. If trauma goes untreated then it influences parenting techniques unnoticed and they fail to 'break the cycle', or stop abusing others as they had been abused.

[@edgarfranciscootalora468]

Yep, you said it right how it is, how it feels. As a Colombian, I'm very grateful to hear all these reactions and thoughts about this movie that it feels so close. In some way really scary, I still got chills and some panic whit the last song. It was hard for me to recognize how is not so normal to lose family because of "the violence". I'm still thinking a lot about the movie, it's hopeful to see that we as a nation can go out of that violent cycle. And also every grain of representation that has the movie is pretty accurate, so if you think it looks good, well there's even more of that, and is very beautiful.

[@cathannah7860]

Encanto shows dissociation, and Mirabel putting her own needs second to help Antonio with his own fears about his Gift ceremony. There are *so* many ways that the movie and the music gave us all a way to go through the healing process, even if our own family structures and members won't allow resolution.

[@katieriales5774]

Thank you for addressing this. I was raised by a recovered alcoholic dad who never finished middle school and a mentally ill mother who never addressed her own traumas. They both put too much on my shoulders because I was the only girl and a natural learner. What wasn’t addressed was my sexual abuse by a family member, my self-harm, and my ADHD. I grew into an adult who overcompensates and always seeks to please everyone else but myself. Constantly feeling not good enough and judged. Encanto spoke to me so much.

[@amidlej8237]

During quarentine, I've been realizing that there is generational trauma present in my family. It is not directly direcioned at me, but it certainly is on people that I care about. To put it simply, 3 people on my family live on the same house, these being my grandma, aunt and cousin, and I don't have much context on what happened to them to make them act this way around each other, but they fight a lot behind my back, and certainly don't like one another. My mom describes them as 3 hedgehogs inside a tight box, only hurting the other ones with the spikes, as a sort of "defense". This video made me see that my mom broke this cycle, but they bickering when I'm not there and a certain person lying about topics to my face still affects me to a certain degree.

[@marxmarxmarxmarxmarx]

I’m indigenous, and I’ve sadly suffered from generational trauma, my mothers parents weren’t there for her and often made her watch her younger brothers, making her the caretaker at a young age, and when she unexpectedly had me she and my father both drank a lot as I grew up. I had to watch them physically fight and hurt eachother and it still haunts and scares me to this day, they’ve had recent slip ups with alcohol but I hope they get better :”) I’m only 17 so I can’t move or do anything yet due to me suffering with school, I have my own issues and I’m hoping to break the cycle

[@jjaa_joyjoyartist]

No matter what happens to your parents I hope you make it through. Alcoholism is no joke, I should know Obvious loading screen tip 23: Wear headphones when parent A drinks after maxing out their anger points

[@ladennayoung2939]

EXACTLY. You hit the nail on the head. When you operate and function from a place of fear constantly. It's damaging to you and everyone around you.

[@ShadowGalactica]

My grandfather dropped dead of a heart attack at age 49 in front of my mother and all of her siblings. Everyone felt pressure to become successful in order to support my grandmother, and those that didn't become successful, like my mother and our family, were treated like burdens. Not by my grandmother but by my mother's successful older siblings.

[@deenadallas2802]

I think my mom used to go through generational trauma before. Her parents were pretty overprotective, and her older brother didn't treat her very well. But when I was born as the middle triplet of the family, my mother made sure she wasn't raising us the way she was raised. She let us be independent, while also teaching us about what we've got to do in the real world. Also, even though I'm the middle triplet, I feel like I relate a lot to Mirabel because I just want to make my family proud, and since my dad expects me to do well in school (even though he loves me a lot and I do too), I've been pressuring myself to do better. But my mother told me that I never needed to prove myself great for the family because I already am. She said that I can't try to be too perfect because that isn't going to get me anywhere. She told me that because she's been through this generational trauma before. The reason why I think I have the healthiest relationship with my mother is because she loves me just the way I am, and I'm able to talk about my stressful situations with her, and she keeps me company. I try to do the same thing with her when she goes through the same things too because she's the most important person in my life. But the more I feel independent, the more sad I feel for my mom because she never had this kind of independence as a kid. Another reason why I feel like my relationship with my mom is so strong is because we help and support each other through our stress, and we've both tried to be perfect for our families, but it didn't do enough. We both learned that it was better for us to do our best. And even though I go through a lot of stress and depression, I realized what I was doing, and I usually talk about it with the people I love (mostly my mom because she understands me more), and it makes me more positive and optimistic in my real-life situations. And because "Encanto" is one of my favorite movies ever, maybe I should show this to my mother and watch it with her in the future.

[@adzdrawss]

growing up my grandma wasn’t the nicest person to my dad. She was really strict and not sometimes wasn’t very loving to him. Now my dad is doing the same thing to me and my siblings. He’s strict and aggressive with his words. he said to us “if you think this is bad and you haven’t met my mom”. but that doesn’t mean that what he’s doing does it any better. It just means that his mom wasn’t a super great mom. I don’t know how my great grandparents were like to my grandma. but I do wonder if it was around the same. My grandma was born right after World War II. So I wonder what her grandparents felt because they were probably in their teens when the great depression happened. it’s just really hard and weird to think about. my moms talked about my dad and grandma‘s relationship with us before. i can see more cracks in our family as my dad keeps getting worse. he’s not abusive but he’s not doing anything to help himself. my moms tried but my dad is really stubborn. i’ve had many tears over it and some even in video. something that’s been on my back is that I’m aroace and a demigirl. and I’m also closeted. and i’m christian. so the idea that my family could hate me for supporting and being part of the community is absolutely terrifying. thinking about it i haven’t been going to therapy recently. the last time i went was before school started and A LOT of things have happened this year. I want to ask my mom if she can schedule something but i don’t want her to be concerned 😟 thank you for this. it really made me realize i have generational trama. i want my kids to live in a better home than i am right now. i want to be the end how however long this has been

[@BenDeHart]

Thanks for sharing, I hope you get the help and support you need ❤️

[@piney496]

Wow, my story is very similar. Im 28, a bit of a late bloomer due to mental illness, and its still hard to figure out how to go about things. Im just about to start therapy and i hope it can help. Best wishes for you.

[@evahuldivarsdottir2586]

I connect with this film in so many ways. I'm struggling to identify how to change my behaviour caused by generational trauma and my own and it's hard since my daughter is the age that triggers me. It made my so happy when my daughter identified my as Mirabels mom, nurturing and healing I see my self in Peppa thought, being emotionally unstable. Hopefully I'm both.

[@jjaa_joyjoyartist]

The idealism of children is so sweet! Wanting to change is always a great step, because alot of people don't make it that far

[@queenarialya]

me too. i am reallly emtiona;

[@melkzedeckmiranda6586]

Hello from Brazil! This video made me think a lot. In my case, I see my parents always breaking this generational trauma, but there was one that my father took forward. My father came from a large and poor family, and he and his brothers even had to help with the household expenses. Therefore, parents had no way of sharing attention and being full-time tutors, which made them spend a lot of time on the street (squares, etc...) and in the homes of colleagues he had at the time. There was a day when he went to a friend's house to play, and that friend's brother tried to sexually abuse him, but he managed to escape. This reflected a lot on my childhood and adolescence, because he wouldn't let me go to my friends' houses, even knowing my parents and family, leaving very restricted the places I could go. And that, along with the overprotection (especially from my mother) even generated insecurity and discomfort when I thought that where I was going could be dangerous, that I could get hurt, etc.

[@jausel1]

I loved the movie because it was a mirror of my own family. And our trauma comes from our grandparents. My being gay (and Colombian) forced me out of my hometown, country, and I created a whole new life for myself. I was sobbing in the river scene. It was painful because I could relate so much.

[@mangories1999]

Excuse the following rant. It just feels good to get it out. I have watched Encanto like 5 times and broke down in tears every single time. My mother, little brother, and I are first-generation immigrants from a third-world country. My mother went to the United States during a time when she was still suffering from a divorce and barely knew English. She had to leave us in our grandmother's care until she could scrape together enough money, as a single mother of two, to bring us to the states. That was our miracle. I love my mother and am grateful for her sacrifice and grit. But as her eldest daughter, Surface Pressure hits so hard for me because my mother gave me no choice but to go into a healthcare major for the job stability and connections that she already has. She expects me to graduate, get a well-paying job, and help her pay the mortgage after graduation, even though I have no affinity for the field (I am an extremely introverted and anxious person) and would have much rather gone into humanities, arts, or tech. She's even paying out-of-pocket for my college tuition, which is a privilege that I am unbelievably lucky to have. Meanwhile, my younger brother was allowed to choose his own major. The worst part is, she knows I'm miserable. She knows my mental health has gotten worse; she even jokes about it. 5 years of college, thousands of dollars, and my mental health down the drain, for a career I've been groomed for since elementary school (no joke; I wrote it down as my future career for an assignment in FIFTH GRADE). Although I've tried my hardest to fall in love with my major, healthcare is not an easy field. I'm in (unpaid) clinical rotations now (with a part-time retail job on the side) and cry every day. My relationship with my mother has been strained because I'm too stressed and guilty to even look her in the eye; because after everything she's done for us, I resent the path she chose for me, and I feel undeserving of our miracle. I bawl my eyes out every time Abuela Alma says, "I was given a miracle. A second chance. And I was so afraid to lose it that I lost sight of who our miracle was for. And I am so sorry." I understand that my mother suffered. I understand she wants what's best for us. I just wish she would apologize.

[@susanacardona7833]

As a Colombian I clicked with encanto due to the generational trauma caused by the violence in the civil war and many other periods of dark times throughout the history of my country, this video is beautiful and full of wisdom, thank you.

[@kissedbyfireskye8428]

My nan on my mother side was a true narcissist and my mother was a victim of her and met my father who was also a narcissist and his family have a whole mental health issues. My mum was the opposite to my Nan, kind and caring whilst my father was abusive and a bully like his father (who was a alcoholic) to me. My mum did her best to protect me but I was treated like an outcast of the family.. I’m breaking the cycle and don’t want kids (not just that but I don’t have any desire to be a mother) or put them through generational trauma. Loved this movie I cried so much in the end ❤️

[@kassyyar97]

As a latin-american, encanto is a very american story about our corner of the world. Theres nothing more unreal than a latin abuela or abuelo admitting their mistakes and owning them. I’ve been marked as the black sheep by my family and I am always trying to make them empathize with how my siblings and even cousins feel but its just impossible. I am just hoping that if I have kids one day (which I dont think I’ll ever want to have, I dont want to ruin their lives as much as my family ruined mine) I become the parent that I always needed to them. Still, it is a very good movie and gave hope and understanding to lots of people, so I appreciate that.

[@BabyGirlTiny]

I mean, the point is that they’re healing. But I guess Latin America don’t really have feel good movies

[@kassyyar97]

@@BabyGirlTiny I didnt say it was wrong, what I mean is that we, as latin americans, make fun of a movie about latin americans’ families where the main concept is healing from generational trauma. There are memes and everything my guy. When an american company portrays your culture in an unrealistic way its very easy to notice.

[@spoof2450]

As someone who has generational trauma from a Holocaust [Britain's empire] this film hits home.

[@IofSheikah]

Coco was great movie about getting past generational trauma too, and Recuerdame makes me cry my eyes out

[@andianderson3017]

Both of my Dad’s parents were formerly married to other people with precious children when those marriages ended tragically. My grandfathers wife died horribly of cancer at a time when there was almost no help or even medicine to ease suffering. My grandmother was abused and cheated on by her first husband until he abandoned her and her son. They met each other and had a fast romance and fast marriage-obviously just trying to fill in the holes of their pain and move on. They fought bitterly and compared each other to former spouses or the lives they wished they actually had for their entire marriage. My father was the first child born to this relationship and he spent his entire childhood trying to get his parents and his older half siblings to get along. He moved on to become a pastor who is always helping, always mediating, always buying someone food or gas, and never ever feels like he’s done enough to care for people or to solve people’s issues. As a kid I was constantly upset about any tension in the family and any sign that people were unhappy with each other. I’d poke at relationships and tensions until the exploded and people had to confront each other and I never understood why I did that. I felt like such a trouble maker. I felt like other people’s roles in our family were so much more clear and desireable. I just felt like a mess. The song “miracle” makes me ugly cry because I would do what anyone else does with gladness but that never seemed to be my role or gift. I do exactly, comically what Mirabelle does. I poke at people and get them to fight or open up because I’m terrified of the distance, pain, anger and trauma that was so clearly in all my aunts and uncles. I never wanted that kind of feuding and distance for us. I can’t express how much this movie made me ugly cry. And your video is helping me see why I have such a hard time accepting that people might be frustrated or angry with each other. It’s helping me see it as a gift and helping me see that I need to sometimes just accept tension and not always believe it’s my job to fix. I don’t want to burn myself out trying to fix the world like my Dad. I’m happy that I have high empathy and high skill in negotiating conflict, but also it’s ok for me to decide things are not my job and not my business and sometimes families can handle being imperfect or having some anger or tension sometimes. I try to teach my kids HOW to have conflict instead of completely avoiding it like my parents often did. It’s definitely something I’ll be chewing on for awhile too, to understand how it affects me. Anyway, thanks.

[@andianderson3017]

I meant *previous children*. Oh well.

[@auggiejaime3820]

I understand you. It's really hard and heartbreaking when other families have tension and eventually result in divorce, abandonment, or worse, but we must learn to accept that things are out of our control and we can't possibly make everyone happy or together, and that's okay. While it's great to help someone heal along the way and have empathy, it's also important to not be hard on ourselves for something out of our control

[@thatcraftypanda]

The timing of this movie and short is personally rather interesting for me. 2020 was more than just the world as a whole falling apart, but also that of my nuclear family. I sought out therapy and after identifying generational trauma, which we didn't title until mid 2021, I decided to work through some rather intensive therapy to help with the PTSD I had been diagnosed with at three. I identified so much with Luisa, having been the child who was placed in a position to keep my parents together, to keep my abusive father from hurting my mother. I had other pressures of being the perfect A student, chaste as southern society dictated, and to be the proper 'woman' to a male run world. There was so much pressure that I developed an eating disorder to have something to control and as an adult when all control was stripped from me, I regressed to traumatic triggers always worrying I wouldn't be strong enough or just plain enough to be worthy. I wasn't aware of the message of the movie going in. I wasn't aware how it would effect me, but quickly this has risen to the top of my favorites. Recently I wrote a letter to my mother, a letter she will never read. In this five page (typed) letter several times I beg her to see me- to see what I went through and where I have come. I ended it with: I see me. Never has the ending of a movie hit me so hard, and to see so many people identify with this makes me suddenly feel not so alone... And that helps lend me strength.

[@nahiab.martinez1460]

Yesterday my father told me he was a bad father, and that his father was a bad father too so if I become a parent one day I will be bad too and I will be thanking him for warning me Sorry father, this is where your cycle of power abuse and treating people agressively ends :/

[@mellllle93]

Louisa spoke to me more on a level of mental load, of trying to keep everything together in your head, Isabelle on perfectionism, and Mirabelle on feeling never good enough. Encanto is for that what Frozen probably was for a lot of kids. Thank you for the video, great insights!

[@socladriana]

I love how the climax of the story isn't some spectacular epic deed, like in most (Disney) movies, but the subtle power of an apology. To me, that speaks volumes about a shift from a focus on the external to a focus on what's internal.

[@brittany1049]

I come from a family with lots of generational trauma (like a lot of my fellow commenters). I really liked this movie, but I have to say that Mirabel’s sentiment that “there’s nothing broken that can’t be fixed” was very bittersweet for me. If therapy has taught me anything, it’s that sometimes there’s things that can’t be made right, and we have to sometimes move on from people who hurt us, family or not. Sometimes the only way to “fix” things is to stop trying to fix it with older generations, and focus on being different with your own family and (potential) kids.

[@ijwd424]

I can't bring myself to watch Encanto as me realising I have to be a cycle breaker is still very fresh in my mind. From what I've heard about the ending I'm afraid I'll just end up disappointed after potentially re-opening a healing wound. I'll just not take that chance but I'm happy we have a movie about generational trauma

[@EvolverForU]

i dont cry often. especially with movies. with that said, encanto is one of the only movies/tv shows thats ever nearly made me cried. i almost cried at waiting on a miracle bc i've never related to a protagonist more than mirabel in that moment - that feeling of being the "outcast" of my family, and being desperate to fit in (im one of the only lgbt, non-religious family members who also has hobbies more on the creative side, in a family full of people who work in business) i saw a lot of my family's behaviors with the madrigals. it felt especially touching for me

[@R2ninjaturtle]

You’re the first video I’ve found that’s gone into depth about what generational trauma is and it’s helped me puzzle together that’s exactly what my family has been dealing with and what I’ve been trying to figure out with my own mental health. So thank you for that ❤️

[@overgrowth3603]

This movie really hit me because this last year I've been realizing a lot of truths about a childhood I thought was good and normal. It was not. Accepting that has been very hard, but a big piece was I couldn't understand how my parents-who I knew loved me unconditionally-could hurt me so much. It wasn't until seeing this movie that I realized it, and it has helped me process it and move on.

[@mirthkos]

I'm glad people talk about this more and it's represented in kids movies. I have kids who are nearing their teen years and they already have their own traumas, with climate and virus. I don't think I'm doing good job as a mom if I just add my own baggage to their shoulders. What I should do, is to give them tools they can use without hurting themselves.

[@magiv4205]

My Ur-Oma, great-grandmother on my mother's side was forced to flee her ancestral home in Poland in the dead of night during WW2, her husband, a scientist and vocal opposer to the Nazis, murdered. Several of her siblings and 10 children did not survive the flight across the nearest border into Germany. My Grandmother, Oma, was five at the time. She grew up in the DDR, in East Berlin, poverty-ridden and starvation always around the corner. Ur-Oma was harsh with her remaining children, as she wanted to make sure nothing like the pain she'd experienced would ever happen again to her family. As a result, I'm not sure if it was started by Ur-Oma or Oma, but all I know is that Oma was so scarred that she denied her polish heritage for the rest of her life. She and her family became, for all intents and purposes, stereotypical germans. I didn't even know I was part Polish until I was 21. Oma eventually ran away with my Opa, a bavarian farmer that my Ur-Oma greatly disapproved of since she wanted her to marry rich and ensure a good life and reputation for the family. Both Oma and Opa were abusive to their three children and abusive to eachother. My uncle, my family's very own Bruno, was and still is always looked down on by most of the family for his free thinking, neuroatypical, chaotic nature, but he fulfilled a great dream of his and built a beautiful cabin in the woods close to his parent's estate, where he now lives, almost entirely self-sufficient. My aunt was almost disowned for daring to divorce her first husband, having her second child out of wedlock and being a single mom. My mother is an unapologetic monster who has continued her family's pattern of abuse with us. Towards the outside, my parents seemed like a happily married, well off couple, but they always made us close the windows when we screamed at eachother and violently fought... which was almost every day. My little sibling, always the black sheep and the one who seemingly didn't share any of their sisters' talents and always fell behind us in school, was the first to realize something was very, very wrong even though they couldn't put it into words at that point. They were sent to a catholic boarding school for a year at 15 and never moved back home. From that point on, I became the main target. I'm the oldest and had always tried my best to protect the others and keep the peace, even if my mother let her anger out on me. Eventually, though i love my family, I couldn't take it anymore and moved out too at 19. But not before I said my peace and finally put into words everything that was wrong with the family and how much they'd hurt my siblings and I. My younger sister, the golden child, is the only one still living at home, though my mother has since moved out - They got divorced (good for him) and both my mother and to a lesser extent my dad and sister blame me for it. I say it's the best thing that could have happened to us because my parents' marriage was already hanging on by a thread and SOMEONE had to stand up to the cycle of abuse and say "This ends HERE." Sib and I are both in therapy, they finally let me convince them that it'll be good for them, and we recently watched Encanto together. We held eachother during much of the movie, it was an incredibly emotional experience. We both doubt our own mother and grandmother will come around, and for us, no contact is the best form of therapy. But still, it was an incredibly beautiful, encouraging story that gave us hope that at some point, somehow, our family, or what's left of it, will be able to heal. We know that the two of us will probably have to do the lion's share of the work in convincing the rest to look in the mirror, even though we shouldn't have to, but that's ok because we'll do it together. For now though, we'll first look after ourselves. Luckily, we both have amazing found families who will always support us in becoming the best versions of ourselves we can be. And we have eachother. We can do this.

[@Issuh]

Thank you so much for making this video. We all needed to talk about everything we saw after watching Encanto, along with Bruno ofc. All that generational trauma, the downfall of letting others’ expectations control your life, the silent suffering experienced individually while existing within a family unit, etc. And you’re right, finding a level of relatability to the members of the Madrigal family is triggering. But it is also healing. I can also attest to that statement. Especially as I am now only beginning to embark on a journey of healing as a 24yo. After so many years of pushing my traumas aside, staked on the belief instilled into me that I am insignificant to the grand scheme of things, I think I’m finally ready to confront those traumas and realize my true worth, to begin putting myself first for once. It’s a terrifying and tough journey ahead, but I wholeheartedly believe it’s worth it. I want to break that cycle of generational trauma desperately and I don’t want my future to be stained with them. This lyric struck me particularly hard during the song Dos Oruguitas “Ay, oruguitas Don't you hold on too tight Both of you know It's your time to grow To fall apart, to reunite Wonders await you Just on the other side Trust they'll be there And start to prepare The way for tomorrow”

[@BenDeHart]

That song wrecks me every time.

[@beatrizarizi8722]

Can't even write a proper video, cuz I'm crying, knowing how hard it is to try to break the cycle and how important it is to know that it is in fact a cycle that has made so many victims but even that adds another layer of pressure that people often don't realize

[@relsey157]

I feel so much like Luisa in my family that I've created.. being a wife and mother. The line "I hide my nerves, and it worsens, I worry something is gonna hurt us" hit me hard. I suffer with anxiety and trying to do all I can for everybody day in and day out I can barely sleep at night.

[@allydr90]

I noticed a lot of people say that Abuela's apology at the end is not realistic. What people miss from this is that older people can change only under one circumstance: thru a new traumatic event. Losing their house was that traumatic event. Honestly her apologizing made sense after the loss of their house. She didn't apologize before losing the house... Only after.

[@sud-ong]

Now I’m getting worried for my neighbor’s kids and their future grandkids. They were displaced by the war in Marawi here in the Philippines some years ago and right now the parents are doing their best to get by everyday. Hope they can live through the recent generational trauma they’re in right now.

[@Felixia33]

The kids were expected to "help the community" since 5 years old. Meaning work. They started working at 5. This was normal at the time, of course, my 4 grandparents started working outside the house around 8-10 years old. Physical work, manual work, not only to help at home (chores) but to "earn" their keep. This is because the Madrigals are not only seen as "helpers" but they are basically the governors and providers of Encanto. This started after Alma recieved the miracle: She looks back and sees the other people looking at her for guidance (they probably stayed in Casita while building the rest of the town). Later, people go to them if they need anything as if they're expected to help no matter what, like a government would. We don't even see Julieta outside the kitchen (or away from food) more than twice. Some older people (most likely the same that saw the miracle be born) approach Alma with concerns about the magic, like worried citizens asking about the state of a hospital or the budget of the town. At the end everyone helped them to rebuild Casita, as payment for everything they've done for them, but at that moment I couldn't help but think: "of course you have to help them, they're your providers!"

[@793lefty]

Thanks for making this. I found Encanto to be healing and pointing in the direction of further healing. The music alone pulled at my heart strings, "killing me softly". It's a reflection of such a wide array of difficulties and ways to grow from them. I'm so pleased kids are being exposed to these sorts of ideas. When I was a kid my favorite was The Little Mermaid and remembering that bratty "Daddy, I love him!" now makes me wish I had these kinds of movies more so than the fairytales.

[@queenarialya]

you can watxch grave of the fireflies

[@kemaila]

I’ve listened to a bunch of analyses of this movie and THIS is the explanation that makes the most sense to me!! I saw others saying that Maribels gift was hope which had been lost with the growing focus on the gifts and strengths. Someone else said she was an embodiment of the miracle itself and became the source for her families gifts to continue. I could see that especially when they pointed out the homonym likeness of their names to magical and her name to miracle. But when I watched it, I really felt her gift was more like vision or authenticity. She could really see the members of her family past their gifts and loved them deeply and was honest and allowed them to see themselves (and yes, eventually inspired them to hope and therefore she became the source of the magic continuing). But the relation to family trauma ties the gifts to many symptomatic sometimes coping responses to trauma and also the heavy burden of success after survival. I love this, thank you for your thoughts. My minds racing I gotta go watch it again!

[@bnashee]

this video really did put into words how i feel about this movie. i love Encanto and it made me cry so much. plus the line in this video about how sometimes breaking the cycle means cutting your family off... that really spoke to me. I come from a family chock full of generational trauma that they never addressed and i had to be the one to leave for my own sake because they weren't going to grow.

[@Miss_Distress]

I have been studying Mental Health and a big part of the unit I’m in now is on Generational trauma. It’s fun to hear it applied to the movie, and brings home exactly why I enjoyed it so much. Also Mirabel is my favourite because her power is Active Listening 😀

[@michelleheegaard]

It's insane knowing my grandmother's and mother's childhood as intimately as I do and see the patterns of trauma and abuse stretching its way across generations and into my own. Each person before me has done their part to make their children's childhood better than the ones they had - but each has been marked by the trauma sustained during their childhood and has ultimately reproduced some of the patterns in their own parenting style. I know it's something I'll have to wrestly with myself when I become a parent and I'll have to be extremely conscious about my behavior towards my own children to avoid reproducing more of those abusive patterns into the next generation.

[@littlemurdermachine6646]

It's *rare* for the parent or an older family member to revealed parts of their past to their kid. It takes strength to shared a secret from your childhood that traumatize you because sharing your trauma with your kid shows that you trust them enough to tell them why you're the way you are. I remember when I was 12 my mom told me stuff she went as a kid when she was in Thailand and I asked her "why are you telling me this?" And she said "because I trust you." Looking back I'm grateful she told me and trust me enough to tell me why she likes this.

[@baku2461]

This movie had me crying buckets. Because I identified with the generational trauma, but also, because I am so proud of my family and all we have done together to break the cycle, heal and build our family up. While none of my siblings or I wanted to blame my mother because we knew she was dealing with severe PTSD, it came to a point where she acknowledged the hurt she had caused us because of the trauma. Through everything, our one saving grace was that none of us would ever give up.

[@nitzan3782]

5:40 some of us are alive thanks to your grandfather and people like him.

[@heyidaroo]

My mom dealt with religious, patriarchal, and misogynistic trauma (as did my grandma). My mom thought she was breaking the cycle by refusing to be a subservient Lutheran housewife who’s barefoot & pregnant, and she *refused* to follow any gender norms. Unfortunately I was subjected to that same misogynistic trauma by my mom who genuinely thought she was breaking the cycle. She was devastated when I gravitated toward the color pink, when I showed an interest in makeup and fashion, and when I (originally) wanted to pursue a career in childhood education. This were all too gender-norm-y for her, but she did not realize that she was putting just as many suffocating constraints on me as her parents did to her.

[@mattjones8713]

This video made me feel SO seen. A good level of seen. As a member of the LGBTQ community. Found family and chosen family is SUPER important to me. I just was never close with my dad. Who raised me pretty much on his own. I always felt like I couldn't ever be enough, and that I was never going to amount to anything. I had to break that cycle of abuse myself. My family never really mistreated me because of my sexuality. But because I could never rely on my dad as a source of support. I felt alone and needed that found family to help me through. So once again THANK YOU for allowing me to feel seen, and validated.

[@abad_ito334]

yes the movie did leave me with some weird feelings that made me tear up and put me in this phase of processing the state I was in, and only after listenning to your incredible explanation that i can put words on it. I related to this movie about the feeling of watching your family crumble without knowing what to do or where to start and everyone seems to suffer silently and wait for it to completly broke tired of trying, the feeling of being considered as the cause of every problem that happened, the feelings of anxiety when trying so hard to fit those high expectations yeah there's a lot to say about this movie but i'm definitly determined to brake the cycle

[@aizakkukun4985]

For me this movie is special to me because of Mirabel's desire of being approved or feeling validated and seen. I'm an artist and I don't really seek validation from my family, but I do like hearing words of praise from my friends. I got into this friend group in discord with a bunch of different artist. There's this one friend of mine that just reacts strongly with my other's friend art and I felt really insecure about it. I did everything to atleast get recognized and validated by them but I hit on a reality that they just really don't like my art as much as my friend's art, that's why I decided to cut myself off in that circle of friends to avoid him, because of this I also lose sight of the people around me who genuinely and actually supports my passion for the arts. I think this is not really connected to Mirabel's character but I do think she also wants to be seen by her family, that she also wants to help the family, that she has something to offer even if she doesn't have gift.

[@palor2911]

Thank you for this beautifully well-done video.

[@faithdarling6036]

I love this analysis, and I love how you pointed out the obvious themes of generational trauma (the raccoon short really got to me, no words spoken, but so much said)

[@katiesnudden829]

I don't know why but just listening to this made me cry and feel heard. I'm someone who unfornatualy sees my family in the madrigal family not only because we are part Hispanic but we exhibit many of the same tendencies and generational trauma. I wish I could say my mom was a good mom like Mirabels but she was my biggest abuser and the worst thing is she was the parent that I had the closest connection too. But I chose to break that cycle with my possible future children. I refuse to hurt them the way she did me. I refuse to be the mom thst makes her daughter feel like she's worthless or would be better off is she wasn't alive. I just wish I could get my sister out of there right now

[@unapologeticallyabraham]

I absolutely love your commentary here regarding encanto. I can certainly relate to the fact that there is a certain level of expectations from family that require you to be a certain way but like you mention you have to be yourself otherwise it will create cracks in the family.

[@victorlannister5606]

I posted a long comment about my messy family but I now I have a better idea. I don’t know who needs to hear this but you are worth so much more than anyone knows. You can do whatever you put your mind to. You are with more then people’s expectations or assumptions about you! You might not always know this or believe me but it’s true. You deserve every happiness! And it’s ok if you haven’t found the place you’re comfortable yet! You are going through a lot and you are valid in you feeling! Sometimes families can be great. But sometimes parents aren’t always right either. We’re all vastly different people and I don’t know who or what is in your life or how you are dealing with it but I want you to know how valuable you are!

[@sebastiancanoncastellanos4409]

Your content is pure gold. Enjoying it here from Colombia!

[@PenntheDragon]

I really do appreciate how this film addresses generational trauma and I appreciate you for making a video concentrating on that. I related to Bruno, because when I was younger I have felt that I was the "Black sheep" of the family that didn't really fit in. With how Bruno was treated, he developed a lot of self-conscious issues, but instead of being resentful, he still deeply cared for his family and thanks to Mirabel he was able to rejoin them. Over the years, I was able to be more self-confindent and having better connections with my family.

[@moviesaredope]

I am so happy that your parents were open to hearing about their flaws & choosing to change and grow (I'm also very jealous, cuz mine are not 😂)

[@BenDeHart]

I’m incredibly lucky. Many of my friends were not so fortunate, and it really makes me appreciate my parents

[@monicadanielaroylamadrid4206]

I personally loved Encanto, I started living on my own a few months ago and I have watched my parents, grandparents in a different light. They lived through different experiences than mine and I have finally being able to see them as human beings who just tried their best and didn't failed to some degree. My parents were hellicopter parents and they just realized how much damage they "created" in their way to "protect" me. Hopefully I can see my parents eye to eye and do not repeat the same mistakes with children of my own.

[@bellerain381]

My brother and I both were given certain expectations in life by our parents….they did give us choices, but they had conditions. We could pursue whatever career we wanted, but we HAD to go to college. My brother hated school and even though I begged on his behalf to let him go to a trade school(he’s a mechanical genius) but they did not budge. I loved college and was able to pursue my dream job, but it came at a cost. I became an overachiever and anxious if I don’t take the extra mile and there are times where I cannot open up to my family. I have identified these feelings and I am taking the steps on setting boundaries and bettering myself.

[@valeriejames6316]

TW abuse I went through an abusive childhood. My biological father was young and disappeared before I was born. My (now ex) step dad was abusive. In all ways. I just started therapy last May. I am 44. I went from an abusive home life to a marriage that turned abusive. Generational trauma is real. My (soon to be ex) husband was abused. He, in turn, abused me, and our son (physically). And with our daughter, he's abusive because he favors her and she can do no wrong. That's mental abuse. It isn't fun. Divorce is hard. I haven't been the perfect mom. I've been known to let my anxiety flare up as anger. I'm doing much better at recognizing it and stepping away. I'm trying to end the cycle. I only hope it's working.