Encouragement for the overwhelmed and angry mom

Every mother knows that there are moments in motherhood that bring out the worst in us. We can feel overwhelmed and triggered, and these feelings may result in angry outbursts toward those we love most. If any of this resonates with you, this episode with Natalie (the Angry Mama Coach) is a must-listen. Natalie shares her history with anger in motherhood and coaches us on recognizing triggers, dealing with anger in a healthy way, shifting your mindset, and more. May this conversation be an encouragement to you no matter where you are in your motherhood journey.
In this episode, we cover:
- Natalie’s story of overcoming destructive anger in her early years of motherhood
- A simple acronym to help you pause when you feel anger rising
- How do you know if your anger is destructive or normal?
- Healthy ways to express anger
- Recognizing your triggers and taking proactive steps to avoid overwhelm
- How hormones play a role in our feelings of anger and overwhelm
- Where to begin shifting your mindset if you find yourself not enjoying motherhood
- Avoiding the comparison trap in your parenting
- Not allowing even good things in life to steal your peace
Thank you to our sponsors!
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ABOUT NATALIE
Natalie Hixson is a wife, mother, auntie, and certified professional life coach who helps discouraged Christian moms overcome destructive anger and burnout. After learning to thrive in motherhood and process anger in a healthy way, Natalie became convicted to help other moms avoid those dark years of motherhood by helping them to appreciate and process their anger, learn to identify their triggers, and ultimately control their reaction to those triggering situations. She enjoys her own motherhood journey by hanging with her husband Mike and their three daughters in beautiful Bozeman, Montana. She recharges with Jesus, coffee, and adventures with her family like skiing in the winter, hiking in the summer!
RESOURCES MENTIONED
Natalie is offering the Simple Farmhouse Life audience access to her Trigger Tracker as a first step to overcome destructive anger in order to be the fun, present and joyful wife and mom you want to be. The Trigger Tracker will help you identify your triggers, create awareness around them, and support you in changing your mindset around these triggers: www.nataliehixson.com/SimpleFa....
CONNECT
Natalie Hixson the Angry Mama Coach
Website: www.nataliehixson.com/
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Pinterest: / nataliehixson
Lisa Bass of Farmhouse on Boone
Blog: www.farmhouseonboone.com/
KZbin: / farmhouseonboone
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Join us in the Simple Farmhouse Life Facebook community: / 748012922264552
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[@user-xh1cg2bt3y]

One thing someone said that has served me well as a parent of 2 young children: imagine you are your 70 year old self looking back at this moment in time and thinking “how do I wish I would have responded?” It gives perspective in that the daily challenges seem so much smaller, but the impact of how I choose to respond can last a lifetime.

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

Good advice. Thanks for sharing with us.

[@softsophisticate]

I'm 57. I have always given myself way too much to do. Exhausted, I took a long look at what was important and REALLY needed doing. 1. Food Shopping, Making meals and clearing up after. 2. Exercise 3. What NEEDS doing today - what has a deadline, eg paying a bill or buying a birthday card / gift. Everything else can wait until those are done.

[@MysteryExodus]

I struggle with this so much. I don’t know how to fix it. I read so many self help books and as soon as I close the book it all goes out the window. I feel like when I get angry my brain shuts down and I forget everything I taught myself. It’s such a struggle.

[@user-tf7of1pz4c]

I appreciate you being so real about the anger. It's one of the things that scares me the most about myself.

[@staceyrogers6125]

Within the past week I've felt like God has been leading me to deal with this issue of anger. I just had my third baby and I've seen myself become someone I don't want to be in those hard moments. I can see He is still showing me His desire to change my heart and give my boys the Mommy they need.

[@maceylynn6344]

Wow I’ve never heard a mom be so honest about this and I know God spoke through the both of you. I am exactly in this spot right now. It’s embarrassing and overwhelming and It’s also affecting my marriage. Two nights ago i totally lost it and was just left begging God to walk me out of this season. I had such awful thoughts of myself and truly was blinded by the enemy of all the wonderful qualities God has given me in my motherhood walk. Thank you Natalie and thank you Lisa.

[@elizabethbrink476]

God is so good. This has been a struggle for me and here you are with an answer to my prayer for help. Bless you ladies and the work you do.

[@priscillaleavitt3607]

Thank you for being a mentor to me in this topic. It’s a huge blessing, more than you will ever know! Lisa, thanks for hosting people of faith who are mentors to those listening, and thanks for being a mentor to all of us yourself!

[@minihomesteadcooking]

I really appreciate this. I had a hormonal yelling mom. I wish I understood at that time about hormones. I really an greatful that you brought your faith in Jesus into this. He is a true healer. I have 7 daughters 2 sons. All but 4 are married. Everyone should hear this.

[@dawngraham17]

I needed this more than I knew I did! I'm a screaming stressed out mom of 8. I know I can do this but I need to remind myself every day that I have the Lord by my side and everything will be ok. Thank you Lisa!!

[@emilytossetti-farmgirlmerc1878]

One of your best episodes. Every woman thinking of being a mom to the experienced moms should listen. We all hit our limits, but with God’s grace we can overcome. Great tips!

[@darienhemmerlein7543]

Thank you for sharing this. It definitely resonated with me. I remember when I realized how my work was overextending me and my children were getting my already tired self. Thankfully I was able to adjust those circumstances. I've been reading my Bible and really trying to carry more of that peace in my heart, making sure I get naps, etc and don't overload our days. but when things get intense and really busy I still find that this is something that I am struggling with. Having children has felt like training myself more than them in a lot of ways

[@alecsgirl]

I’m glad that you were able to recognize that and adjust your circumstances 👏🎉 I really think that the Lord gives us children and marriage as not only a beautiful picture of his love for us, but also as a continual sanctification process. No one can knock the rough edges off of us (or show us that they’re there) like those whom we love the most-our spouse, our babies, etc. I definitely am needing and appreciating this reminder to take control of my anger and love my kids well today.

[@gettingjamieback1888]

My little girl is autistic and my son is not but has some ocd and sensory issues. I am a single full time momma that also works full time job, does all the extra circular things, housework and everything else. It is so easy to become overwhelmed and angry. I always talk about how i feel to my kids so they know its the situattion that may have upset me not exactly them.

[@shelbymarie9408]

Thank you for this podcast, I'm a fairly young mom, wife and homemaker, and this is something I struggle with, but God is good and He has helped open my eyes to ways I can change that area of my life.

[@leahbrie97]

Thank you so much for raw honesty. I have felt so much shame for my anger issues.. I needed this so much ❤

[@maddiepinkgirl]

Thank you for this very helpful episode! After my third baby my mom rage really started taking off. I didnt even feel like myself anymore and hearing you be honest about your experience was really comforting and inspiring! I know i can change for the better and im praying for all the moms going through this as well!

[@angrymamacoach]

So glad this encouraged you! Us mamas are not alone, but the enemy will sure try to make us feel that way. Yes you can change and grow from these trials in motherhood. So good!

[@crystalwestlake7148]

Third baby is where a flip switched in me too! Glad to constantly be learning and growing and grateful for Gods sanctification. ❤

[@tiffanyprice8319]

@@crystalwestlake7148same!!

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

Glad it was helpful!

[@gentlecatholic]

This was absolutely on point and I do feel like the Holy Spirit led you to do this episode. God bless you both

[@sabl6381]

This is timely information for me. I have an almost 2yo with another on the way, and I have been struggling with the challenges of toddlerhood.

[@meagana3422]

The holy spirit put this in my feed today. Thank you so much.

[@Dana-mb1hd]

Wow do I need this…. I’ve been struggling. This video is a blessing thank you ❤

[@SamElizabeth815]

I was thinking the same thing! It's so nice to know you're not alone when your heart is struggling through something.

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

You are so welcome

[@reynaldamartinez3168]

Thank you for this video...so much needed.

[@TheMennomilist]

I also am a certified life coach, and I can relate to this conversation in several ways! Life coaching training really opened my eyes and helped me so much. I got angry a lot with my firstborn (17 years old now). He also is a very argumentative person, where there is an excuse and answer for everything. He and I are really close and it is really lovely how he remembers how I used to be and knows I have grown and changed. The whole "Not listening thing" was the hardest thing to get through. I had to realize that my dad, who used his anger against me and my brothers had upset me so much and that I had to work against being like my dad to be the best version of myself to my children. It kept me aware to think purposefully through my words and actions. I like what you said about what gets you angry. . hungry and bad news overwhelms you. I think most people do that. We need to communicate to our children, "I am not doing well today because I haven't eaten. Can we pause for a moment. . ." I feel like communicating out loud and to our children to understand why you are feeling like acting out in anger, helps them vocalize when they get moody too. They will be more self-aware.

[@angrymamacoach]

So good! Communication is key! And hello, fellow coach, it a beautiful work! :)

[@janiceyoder621]

Thank you for sharing Natalie with us! I had no idea she was out there! I could about cry, because the feeling of not being a good mom to my kids is something I deal with a lot. Teens take life to a whole other level!

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

You are so welcome!

[@angrymamacoach]

So glad this blessed you! The teen phase is for sure challenging! I plan on talking a lot more about that soon because I am in it! :)

[@ailicec3855]

Feeling this so deeply right now with a 1 and 2 year old. Thank you for sharing this

[@beccal4718]

I've been following Natalie along the internet searching her name for any podcast she has been a guest on, this is something as a mom of 3 under 5 that I need, that sit and pray and reconnect is really transformative in my motherhood

[@AM-bm2xw]

This was so comforting and informative, thank you ❤ I have had a rough time as a younger mom, but I made up my mind to just show up every day and do my best, very slowly things have been getting better and I am learning resilience! Thank the Lord!

[@waddelal1]

I needed this. Thank you for bringing this to us.

[@zaidagonzalez466]

Wow, I did enjoy listening to this topic. I can say I suffer with anger. But like you say depends on the season. Prayer and chatting this out helps out. Mother is hard and no one tells you the true.

[@dearey347]

Brave conversation! Thank you for your vulnerability, transparency, and relatability. God is good and the Truth does set us free. Beautiful women, beautiful conversation. God bless you both.

[@angrymamacoach]

So glad it blessed and encouraged you. 💗

[@UnashamedMama]

I’m 7 minutes in and already crying.

[@akosua8779]

Sis with 4 under 4 and fifth on the way, i need this mentorship more than ever. Never had a mother daughter relationship with my mom she was really unapproachable as a child and i dont want tocrepeat that mistake.

[@katiegodinho2275]

I grew up in Bozeman and now live in TN :) Im extremely angry and burnt out and feel terribly hopeless 😢

[@angrymamacoach]

I grew up here too and now my daughter is in TN! Cool connection! :) I understand feeling hopeless; there is so much hope! Don't stay stuck. Reach out, there is so much that you can do and surrender and grow in this. 💗

[@kayleedravenstatt4475]

I've listened to this twice already! I got so many helpful tips and wisdom. Thank you for this it's exactly what I needed to hear in this season!!

[@kimsuejohnson4016]

I love the transparency and hope this podcast offers, thru the one who can truly sane us, Jesus. Thank you!

[@katelyndklee73]

I saw this at the perfect time today. I have been feeling explosive and triggered with my toddler and being pregnant my hormones are not helping.

[@evenyberg]

The same feelings and circumstances here!! I have a toddler and I'm due any day with our second, I don't struggle with the toddler so much, but I struggle a lot with having a good attitude towards my husband!

[@tarahays5829]

I was explosive with my littles. I regret it looking back. I should have "let them be little. " It goes by so fast

[@sabl6381]

Same. Being pregnant while caring for a toddler has forced me to dig deeper than ever before, but it's also beautiful in that way. God is forging us into more virtuous Christians.

[@viversholisticnutrition8180]

God’s miracle working power is always the answer in the end. I also think practical things like what she’s mentioned is important to be aware of. If I have too much caffeine I get angry. To go along with the hunger.

[@sapphire965]

Perfect timing. I needed this 🥺❤ Thank you for doing this.

[@heatherkang7503]

I really appreciate the quality of content. I've been following you for years and the quality has been been constant.

[@kate3276]

The timing of this video was perfect, really needed to hear this. Thank you!

[@cindyflinchbaugh7155]

Thank you so much for this time together. I learned so much about myself and you really helped me. My kids are in their 40's and so I still have baggage. This video is such a blessing to me, thank you.

[@michelle_juang]

😭 Lately I have been inching toward abusive destructive anger with my toddler. This video was so helpful! 🥹 Thank you. I realized I believed anger itself was bad and that becoming a person who never gets angry was possible. Being thankful for that trial, and modeling to your kids that anger is okay but destruction is not: 🤯 God’s refining process is truely worth it.

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

I am so glad you found this helpful!

[@MitchelleSaez]

Perfect timing! Thank you so much for this. ❤️

[@mayshlove3136]

Thank you for this 😮‍💨 I needed this encouragement and the transparency!

[@kellynelson8337]

Wow, one of my favorite from you yet. I'd love to hear more content relating to heart issues like this along side all of your wonderful more practical content! I don't think I realized how common it is to struggle with anger. Thank you, Lisa!!!

[@jessicakallen]

Another beautiful conversation. Thanks ladies ❤

[@francelymeza3077]

This was great! Hormones are so real. Loved the tip about get space, choosing a healthier process, thinking how in 15 this will be over.

[@becky1789]

Its never over!!

[@americathebeautiful9613]

Amazing thank you! Yes definitely a topic that needs to be normal to talk about we are all human

[@miriamcombe3033]

This is an amazing honest interview. Good work both of you.

[@americaneden3090]

U mommas are very open, honest, & brave throughout this conversation. This is immeasurably helpful to soooo many. Tfs ❤

[@salberthal88]

Oh my goodness. Thank you so much for covering this topic

[@Lalabirdskids]

I needed to hear all of this today. Thank you!

[@stephencameron1709]

So very good for all us Moms. Thank you Lisa. Val C

[@jessicarewis6593]

Thank you so much for doing this episode!!!❤❤❤ I definitely have been wrestling with this issue more or less for a LONG time. I sometimes sing very loudly in order to deal with my anger impulse.😅

[@HomemakerHelper]

Aww an episode just for me?? You shouldn't have😂😂

[@mfpJ4ever]

Just started listening, but important topic, thanks for sharing! I know I need to hear all of this.

[@culturallydifferent]

Thank you so much for another great video! ❤

[@tarrynpitts6538]

My goodness, i needed this today!!!

[@ericadobbins6303]

Thank you for this 😭❤so needed and helpful

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

I'm so glad!

[@Lmr6789s]

Thanks for sharing this. I am an angrier mom and have been trying to change. God has definetly helped me a lot but there is still room for improvement I appreciate how honest she was as I used to be very similar as well in the way I behave thank goodness it's not like that anymore

[@juliannestrelkoff9768]

Thank you! This was golden, glory to God :)

[@RuthEdelstein]

This talk was very emotional for me. Thank you girls so much. But i wanted to comment that kids are generally not ok today. Most parents are not there for their children and that is a big reason why the kids act out.

[@user-iz1rb8kw8s]

Thanks for sharing ! Magnesium glycinate has significantly changed my life! No more anxiety, body aches, can be the calm mama I desired to be

[@lauraturner2823]

I've been taking magnesium as well. It sure is helpful!

[@ramirezsulema87]

Any brands you ladies would recommend?

[@locuyennguyen2538]

Thank you so much for this interview!

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

Glad you enjoyed it!

[@rosepistilli223]

Oh man- i don't know why but the "angry Lisa" thumbnail really cracks me up😂 we have all been there!!!

[@gamingisabellajones6880]

Excellent, encouraging, informative podcast episode. Thank you kindly.

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

Thanks for listening

[@jennyonlimetreelane]

What a super duper subjekt thank you so much! For me its if I am tired and hormones! 😅 Thank you both! Lots of Love from Switzerland Jenny ❤

[@kristinmcewen7012]

This is such a timely podcast for me. As we enter Lent, I’m spending the next 40 days working on responding differently to my kids when I’m angry. Great tips!

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

You got this!

[@debrademedici864]

Good information!!!

[@samanthamiller388]

I am so thankful to have found this podcast on mom anger and dealing with it! My kids are 10 years apart and I had few issues with my relationship with my oldest. Now with my youngest we seem to clash all of the time and it has been very sad, stressful and frustrating. This gave me hope we can work thru it with Gods help and the right tools. Thanks so much for this topic and information. God Bless!

[@dianequist835]

My children now have children of their own, but believe me, I remember when I was a young mom. Naively, I went into motherhood thinking, "this is going to be easy!" 😂 Nothing easy about it. First mistake I made was raising my children as I was raised. It's what I knew. It took a few years to realize the mistake. To realize I had a meddling mother. To realize these children were mine, not hers. To realize she didn't necessarily do that great of a job to begin with. To realize the changes needed to be made. To realize it would not be an easy task. Long story made short, it was difficult, and at times incredibly hurtful (mostly where my mother was concerned), but the result was more godly and constructive. Was it all perfect? No, but a better direction persued. Standing on your own is tough, but knowing God has your back makes it easier.

[@tobiepierce6814]

Great!!

[@tammythielbar8908]

I also think you may need a few years without babies to get some time to yourself!! The best thing I did was to a huge gap in my last two babies and having that time to recoup and spend time with the 4 little boys I had and allowing them to be kids. When my oldest was married, my youngest boy was 12, I had my 2 girls and found myself in peace and enjoyment! I’m thankful I didn’t just pack them in one after the next because I was over whelmed and they were over whelmed!!! Take a break momma!!!

[@tammythielbar8908]

And I truly adore you and say all of that with my heart, I’ve watched for years. I just can’t imagine how exhausted you truly are. Sending love and hugs to you.

[@kaitlync15]

I love this ❤ we have a 2.5-3 year gap between kids and it’s so enjoyable! Anything less would feel overwhelming to me! I love being able to enjoy each kid during that baby toddler stage before welcoming another one ❤

[@SamaraSoyland]

The cycle tracking is so huge!

[@bethanyg153]

Always mention anger issues to your dr. Twice my dr was able to find something through bloodwork and fixing it really made everything manageable and I didn’t have to always end up angry.

[@lindabueckert9559]

Anger can come from overwhelm,frustration but also hormone issues and blood sugar imbalances or vitamin deficiencies.

[@jammieshilynncorgill9988]

❤️❤️❤️

[@user-yo6vs5ol5b]

I had NO idea there were other moms that had anger issues. I had a very, mentally, special needs daughter first and I was a drill sargent witch! Complete control issues. But it worked out quite a bit , as she needed a strict schedule/ life just to keep the peace. I had no one to talk to about it all.

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

Thanks for sharing your experience with us.

[@angrymamacoach]

It's amazing how alone we feel in it, isn't it? I remember those days; I am glad this episode gave you encouragement. No mama is alone in this and my prayer is no mama stays stuck. Glad you are finding ways to work through this!

[@theliterarylamb3]

Great discussion. Yet it is rarely right for us to be angry. Natural absolutely, righteous rarely. But for the Christian there is much hope - confession, repentance and the clothing in Jesus’ righteousness - for there we are never put to shame for our sin. We all have indwelling sin as a result of the fall and our anger can point to that fact. Adam and Eve tried covering their shame on their own but God gave them a better way. Look to Jesus in your anger and find all of it wiped away because He loves and forgives you. I’d be careful with being so accepting of my emotions because they are often rooted in my flesh. Look to the One who saves and justifies you before God. That is the one thing I’d take issue with. The rest of the tips I found extremely practical and wise. And I’m grateful for the honesty in it. I just couldn’t get the part in Jonah out of my mind when God asks him “is it right for you to be angry?” (Jonah 4:4) something worth wrestling with…

[@angrymamacoach]

Oh, for sure, we need to be careful in our anger, yet the feeling of anger in and of itself is not a sin. It is how we deal with the anger that can turn to sin. It's not possible to control a feeling rising up in you, but we can slow it down and not allow it to take over. We should be "slow to anger" (Proverbs 14:29, James 1:19). We want to stop, submit our feelings to the Lord, recognize we are feeling anger, and pray for the Lord to help us work through that emotion in a healthy way. As Psalms 4:4 says, "Be angry, and do not sin. Meditate within your heart on your bed, and be still" (NKJV). We also read "Be angry and do not sin" in Ephesians 4:26. We see many times through the Bible where the Lord himself experiences anger, righteously, of course, but the feeling is there. It's a feeling; our thoughts and actions will determine our outcome. We will feel angry, but we must work through it in a productive way. If you back up a few verses in Jonah, you see it was his actions and words of complaint that were causing his heart to separate from the will of God. Jonah even mentions how God is slow to get angry (4:2). When I read the full context, I read it as God questioning Johan's attitude and rejection of God's will, not the emotion Jonah was feeling. Thoughts?

[@theliterarylamb3]

@@angrymamacoach thanks for the clarification. What helped me feel better about this is James chapter 1: ”Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am being tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone. But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.“ ‭‭James‬ ‭1‬:‭13‬-‭15‬ ‭. So I think we’ve been talking about the difference between temptation (which isn’t a sin) and sin. I think using that word “temptation”is helpful. In our temptations we need to come to God. And it just shows our need for Him every moment because fleshly anger isn’t the only way we’re tempted. Thank you! This has been a good thought process.

[@theliterarylamb3]

It’s so funny that today at church the sermon was on this exact topic (whether in our temptations we sin). It was said that there are external temptations and internal. If in the external temptation we go to a place of sin internally, then it needs confession and repentance. If it’s simply external and brings up no sinful desire in us, then we haven’t sinned. Jesus’ tempting in the wilderness and the beatitudes were cited. Christ’s redemption goes all the way to our core - not just our outward actions. ❤️

[@angrymamacoach]

Thats awesome! :) Love how the Lord clarify things for us.@@theliterarylamb3

[@faithpatience.]

Does natalie have KZbin how can we find her content ?

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

If you click on this video you will see a long description box underneath. In the description you will find links to follow Natalie

[@4theFaith]

I guess KZbin can hear me yelling at my kids. :/ but this week in particular has been rough. I need to get out of the pit.

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

You can do it!

[@angrymamacoach]

Mama, my heart goes out to you. I get it. Don't stay stuck, reach out and know you are not alone and you can overcome this!

[@4theFaith]

@@angrymamacoach how can I get a coaching?

[@MRSyelgnal]

I haven't the time to look at this video atm but please take into consideration peri menopause. Even in your 30's! Just because you have cycle doesn't mean your hormones aren't declining. Low Progesterone in particular. *Hugs*

[@angrymamacoach]

YES!! Hormones are HUGE! When I started some hormone therapy, it helped the rage around PMS. For sure, it is something to be aware of and discuss with your doctor.

[@judystennett6020]

Why would you not pray for patience?

[@Life_is_a_Garden]

People do. I do. And yet it's still hard. Maybe you have it easy?

[@julielitsinger631]

Often people say if you pray for patience, you will be given many opportunities to be patient. (Meaning things going wrong, ect.) I’ve heard people joke not to pray for patience, you’ll have MANY flat tires in the next few days. 😆

[@thehometownhomestead]

Because when you pray for patience, you’re given multiple opportunities to practice patience. It’s like asking for additional tests for yourself, in the eyes of many.

[@chrissmarie455]

Because prayer alone isn’t enough if action isn’t taken to change those behaviors

[@ninaalexa6163]

You would and something like this podcast would be an answer to prayer 😁

[@patriciacarey6324]

All is good but a little too much with the lord. And I am religious

[@GodSoLoved.Yeshua]

What does that mean?

[@SamElizabeth815]

I'm only halfway through the video, and I can't explain how much my mama heart needed to hear this. 🤍