Eric Andre Gives You Sh*tty Dating Advice | GQ

[@PostFruityRebel]

"I've got these rocks to grind into littler rocks."

[@MyAccount217]

My fav part

[@PostFruityRebel]

MyAccount217 Mine too :')

[@greeds4467]

Brendan Robinson as soon as that part came up I read this

[@keyboardwarria]

yea seriously no one is that busy

[@jeanuthenext]

That was actually very well put by the emotionally calloused sociopath. 😂

[@psycold]

It's funny how this is the most serious I've ever seen Eric Andre being.

[@AhnSeoulo]

I think part of it is that expectation for him to be crazy here. So it seems like he'd rather just be brutally honest than be crazy for the sake of being crazy like he always is when people are expecting him to.

[@GuncleMarc]

But then again he did tell young teenagers to pop mollys xD

[@maxijgo23]

Watch Man Seeking woman, he's still crazy and funny but doesn't go out as a maniac.

[@dominicbann4765]

I think Eric was mad at gq for saying that he gives bad dating advice.

[@TheGodNC]

You should watch the interview with Vince staples

[@rickyevans1096]

"I'm an emotionally calloussed sociopath." Preach brotha.

[@TheVOLTER88]

Ricky Evans Eric is too real man

[@panama2468]

No lies

[@scoob1670]

~ricky evans~

[@giinks]

someone lmk what that means

[@allroundlad]

@@giinks Emotionally calloused means lack of feelings and sociopath is just lack of empathy towards others and a heightened sense of self importance.

[@aaronmann9675]

nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare nightmare

[@moosehandler9]

I just spit my food out reading that. Thank you.

[@oOFLOM1996Oo]

*applause*

[@10thejgm78]

+A very judgmental person. don't judge....please

[@10thejgm78]

+Landon Cox I take after eric andre in that I eat my own throw up

[@10thejgm78]

+Landon Cox I take after eric andre in that I eat my own throw up

[@wav.yliving]

In the Netherlands you guys got some great ecstasy LOOOL

[@vannahmae7413]

Dude I see you on so many videos. Tyler the Creator? Capital Steez?

[@nathancamacho8770]

Bruh

[@AttergYorlum]

don t forget abt white heroin

[@chugggs3516]

o yea

[@funtimes3035]

respect the china white

[@cholosocks]

LEGALIZE RANCH!

[@Gshift]

コークス白666 BIRD UP!

[@PROthebloodyboss]

+guinea pig wearing sunglasses it's cancelled...BIRD UP SEASON 5!!!!!!!

[@Gshift]

+guinea pig wearing sunglasses INVESTIGATE 311!

[@cholosocks]

All you guys are being so narcoleptic right now...

[@2PlayDead]

+c0kewhites_ Hey dude, do you know where the heroin convention is? My girl is like a narc right now on taking her on a date. Buzz me brotendo!

[@ffnovice7]

I don't think I got the joke. These are all great pieces of advice.

[@whatsup5914]

lefu it kinda is all good

[@Jing5231]

He didn’t advise them to wear condom

[@hiro6406]

@@whatsup5914 "I love you, cant you see? We are going to be together forever."

[@POVShotgun]

That’s the best one

[@terenarosa4790]

The busy one is not good advice. Everyone stops talking to me just because I don't respond in two seconds. I think my insane level of hotness makes them insecure and they try to reject me before I can reject them. It happens so often I don't think I've ever had the chance to reject anyone. It just doesn't make any sense because everyone is like, "omg you're so hot. I want you so badly. I'll do anything for you" but that reaction seems opposite on dating sites. Forever alone I am.

[@OliVyae]

Is it just me or does Eric Andre seem really intelligent?

[@RgW00D]

He had said before that he received straight A's in school.

[@OliVyae]

Meh. So did I, and I'm not that smart. Grades don't mean anything.

[@RgW00D]

+Oli.Vyae forreal. he loves acid and extacsy.

[@hsojsatuorak146]

if youre not that intelligent then who ami to trust your opinion of eric andres intelligence?

[@OliVyae]

Haha, true! You make a good point. Well, I have SOME intelligence, I'm not idiot, but I also don't want to seam boastful because it's counterproductive.

[@AaronDeLaTorre31]

No condom.

[@hunterawestin1803]

Your child

[@swagman837]

TheLegendShitPoster27 ;-; hmu

[@angelricchi1321]

True love

[@SparkySINN]

Balls deep

[@davemitchell6967]

Lmao "I'm busy" is the greatest excuse God ever gave us.

[@deanwinchester8042]

The molly is actually brilliant advice EDIT: Every one of these was great advice.

[@CGoody564]

serotonin machine guns going off in your brain. lol

[@Doomroar]

Probably not meant to be. But at least now he has drugs.

[@Thetabringer]

Cory Goodman I thought that was yours and as I was writing to tell you how awesome an analogy that is ; then Eric said it.

[@CGoody564]

Ryan Newby this made me chuckle for some reason

[@caelblanch2737]

F I L L H E R C A V I T Y

[@gargantuanfather5648]

his hair is always a different length

[@davidrazzano9963]

so is everyones

[@Edill100]

+David Razzano LMAO

[@scrambler350]

it's like it grows constantly, then he cuts it, but it keeps growing, weird right?

[@eliaseidesund3929]

I think thats how hair works

[@jetttie]

he can retract it into his skull, then back out. hope that helps

[@corndogman221]

serotonin machine gun

[@daniels7568]

delta 10

[@QHuman]

He's right, and he should say it

[@4TRANC3]

I cringed at the guy who wasn't getting the hints. If she's busy every time you try to take her out, she's not interested. The only reason she even responds to his messages is because of pity. Don't be that pathetic. Move oooon.

[@emma7xox]

Al H not true. As long as we reply that means we care, people do get busy, I'm going through this now but the other way around

[@emma7xox]

I'm not speaking for all women, just myself. Chillll

[@EffingL]

Can confirm.

[@westbrook_apologist7422]

Maybe not pity Maybe she wants to be friends but only friends

[@banjomcgee6333]

@@emma7xox What a dumb comment lol. A person who is actually busy but "cares" would at some point propose alternatives or figure out a way to line up schedules to make something happen. If they keep replying that they're busy and leaving things at that, they are *NOT* interested. You only want to believe that because you just admitted you're on the other end of it. So you're obviously biased and shouldn't be leaving advice on this matter at any rate. It's been 3 years since your comment and I'm willing to bet, that person you were pining after has probably long since ghosted you. That's kinda how that works buddy...

[@MehdiNPartDeux]

This guy is funny....he should be a comedian :/

[@BrookeaCookea]

Err... he is. Lol he been doing stand up for 11 years.

[@connorreviere4306]

MrFunkiFresh His show is alright but to call it "the best comedy show atm" either means you are 13 or you simply take way too many hallucinogens. It's straight up random, absurd bullshit. Funny if you're in the mood, but way too much actual thought goes into actual great comedy for his show to even compare. He probably writes his shows in 10 minutes, if he even has to write at all.

[@spyro115]

he is.

[@nathanelidownhour7914]

Gopher Yourself you're being a total narc right now bra

[@spyro115]

Fudgaboutit you mean you?

[@chrismofer]

"speak english doc I ain't a fucking scientist" is a paraphrased quote from walk hard: the dewey cox story

[@Lord_Pilaf]

Chrismofer MACHETE FIGHT!

[@johnnynashville8852]

Chrismofer The wrong kid died

[@aidansteiner3681]

Are you God?

[@Jayangelo1]

"Serotonin machine gun"

[@gorgjesss]

Wanna hit this ranch brotendo?

[@AntonioDoesMetal]

I'm seeing 311 in the quad later dude, and then I'm gonna chase down some Cherokee chicks on the trail of beers

[@2PlayDead]

+Jess Lynne Weiss Dude, I KNOW you! You're Mellow Mike!

[@kodiak530]

+Jess Lynne Weiss you know they can get vert!

[@Stephen-uz8dm]

buzz me, milano

[@Tony78454]

whats funny is i never laugh at those sketches, think those are the worst, but laughed hard at that

[@AngryShooter]

This is was actually all pretty good advice.

[@eatthatpussy]

legalize ranch

[@DrymouthCWW]

i hear they have legalized ranch in Europe. stop on by

[@eatthatpussy]

DrymouthCWW sweeeet

[@ChristianVBlue3]

Legalize meth

[@SonicSeraphim]

Eric Andre is the most qualified man to give dating advice. He's confident, charismatic, hilarious, and humble. Any woman could fall for this man.

[@BossDrSample]

NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE

[@Salmontres]

This was really good advice, I've only gotten 3 restraining orders so far.

[@henrycrawford1199]

“Speak English doc we ain’t scientists”. One of the greatest movie quotes ever.

[@beelzeboo]

"If your love doesn't blossom after that.... after the serotonin machine gun blasts away in your brain...probably not meant to be 😁". I'm dead 😂😂😂😂

[@cyberpower6533]

Idk why I find him attractive

[@jasmineramos7618]

lol me too

[@ErenTheWarcriminal]

Me too. And I'm straight as a snail lol!

[@jumbowumbo9584]

yeah why do you do that

[@vanessac.238]

cuz he is

[@jasmineramos7618]

+Serina Taylor no doubt

[@rando6662]

1:12 haha actually good honest relationship advice

[@llStalell]

funny thing is that advice on someone saying they are too "busy" to date is spot on.

[@BrokenHomePoets]

BIRD UP!

[@h0tp0cketk1d]

SundayHipHop I was looking for this comment😂😂😂😂

[@Adam-qd5go]

*YAH BOOBAY*

[@japaneseproctolgist]

Lol the second one was actually good advice.

[@Natureorganica]

Actually... he really wasn't wrong on any of these. Crude maybe. But definitely not wrong.

[@SantoBeatzTv]

hands down the best advice ever !! he should be on here more!!

[@tmthoms150]

This is actually better than a lot of the advice I've heard people give before.

[@lilkutthroat3469]

sup mellow

[@larrymcjones]

MELLOW MIKE!

[@lildubbs1]

This is my bro Right Dude Here

[@MaxBerson]

any of you guys wanna hit this ranch?

[@lildubbs1]

what are ya reading mein kampf?

[@andersonmitchell9352]

buzz me melado

[@MiXtApEMesSiAh22]

FREE JERRY SANDUSKY

[@Brandizzleizzle]

Hans Landa is a character in Inglorious Basterds (Christoph Waltz)

[@narcspector]

Brandizzleizzle he said Ann Landers...

[@deachelo]

Wassup Steph Nuggs?

[@mistermetalman]

Legalize Ranch “I know you, you’re simple Simon!”

[@mochamayonaisse2014]

what’s up Ramadan Steve

[@mistermetalman]

Ranch it up, mullato

[@sergregorclegane6897]

DADDY GOT HIS JUICE

[@QueenCityAvenue94]

Daddy got his Jews.

[@CleverMetaphor]

Ser Gregor Clegane i drink the stuff, i live it up!!

[@albinomoose92]

LIGHTSPEED; DON'T RAINBOW READ ME, NIGGA

[@TheAnaiscrazy]

Ser Gregor Clegane Alright there! Nice video you have there! On a similar note; have you started communicating with " Vidadsmedia Dating Tips That Work " (just google it)? My sisters boss had some dealings with them and was impressed by their unbelivable knowledge on dating tips!

[@HollSuth]

Smosh

[@orphicophelia]

When he said "Til 2018" I checked the year this was posted and I was shook

[@DjFashla]

Am I the only one who looked up Ann Landers and found out that she was one of the original advice columnists for newspapers? Eric went way too meta on this one.

[@flala2261]

Jaggar Estep wow really😄

[@Spooobz]

For those not getting it, Ann landers was a columnist who would give relationship advice

[@benc7128]

and it was her pen name whi9ch is why he said "is that a real person"

[@SaucyNight]

ann landers was a really surprisingly on point reference as she was a chicago advice columnist..

[@SameBasicRiff]

SaucyNight actually googled her and was mind blown lol

[@johnnyjohn9961]

+SaucyNight we had ann lander's column in our newspaper outside the US... needless to say i did not need to google her name since i got the refrence... but man some of the letters she got made me laugh... example; [ dear abby-- my wife sleeps nude. Then she showers,brushes her teeth and fixes our breakfast,still nude. we're newly-weds and it's just the two of us, i suppose there's really nothing wrong with it. What do you think? -=-=- Ed dear ed ---- It's O.K. with me. But tell her to put on an apron when she's frying bacon.]

[@narcspector]

SaucyNight what movie was like "aw Ann Landers SUCKS!"

[@devonbrowne5446]

My moms name is Suzanne landers but a lot of people call her Anne lmfao

[@evanturner2530]

Yeah right

[@devonbrowne5446]

Evan Turner on my life dude lol her name is Suzanne Elizabeth landers she's 43 she's a single mother of two her social security # is..

[@humblenarrator7838]

devon browne my grandmother had an affair with Susan B Anthony

[@makingplaysITF]

fill her cavity bro

[@vero4449]

It’s 2018. How did it go?

[@Cabarkin]

Eric André CAN give Kanye West any advice.

[@J-Hue]

Now that you mention it, I'm pretty sure Eric Andre may be Kanye's life coach.

[@drphot6050]

#Facts

[@A-Oh-Trey]

That would explain SO MUCH of what Kanye has done.

[@DannyBPlays]

Some of this actually is good advice, like that someone is never really too busy if they're actually interested, they'll make time.

[@danielhernandez-vo9zc]

Guy in the crowd: YESSS!!!!!!!!!

[@thothheartmaat2833]

just gonna go ahead and follow this advice...

[@Dooms98-p2k]

I hate 30 second ads with no skip buttons.

[@JustWinBro]

get adblock

[@Mr_Luna_989]

Mr. Glabalabadubeestu The Mexican Cyclops just mute the volume, way better! I do it all the time

[@eadghe]

Quite helpful, but brutally honest without any friendly detours. And that's why they labeled it "The last person who should give relationship advice", otherwise the PCs would dislike this.

[@beastlyg1531]

Eric Andre is the most unexpected intelligent person I've ever seen😂

[@aussiemma8426]

Seratonine machinegun

[@domenickbraccia]

The Wilt Chamberlain name drop reallly got me

[@HimFinancial]

this dude dated tatyana ali bruh. he's a relationship god in my opinion

[@Qrayon]

I thought she wasn't interested in him. Was it it Chicken Doc who changed her mind?

[@RadiantMantra]

Problem: I have a crush on my best friend, and she's giving me mixed signals Solution: Do drugs

[@crazedmonk8u]

The parenthesis is to input side information that clarifies what you just said. E.g. He finally answered(after 5 minutes). the difference between using commas or parenthesis is whether or not the input actually contributes to the sentence. If you cared about how long it took then do commas, if you were just stating an observation use parenthesis. English professors would tell you to never put parenthesis on a paper that is important, such as for a grade or a resume/business document. And I agree, if the information is not important then save the parenthesis to casual use only.

[@iiTRiXeR]

The mdma advice is actually pretty solid

[@shutup1446]

Trix *ecstasy

[@antoniob9407]

Here after watered down Eric Andre in Lion King WIRED Interview.

[@s0nnyburnett]

Honest advice.

[@nutmonkey9]

this is actually legit advice

[@MinecraftPLayer206]

Bird Up

[@islamfeels7147]

Bird Up snail down

[@kamphet1987]

Esther Pauline "Eppie" Lederer, better known by the pen name Ann Landers, was an American advice columnist and eventually a nationwide media celebrity.

[@legokingiscool]

lmfao! Eric Andre ROCKS

[@NicHasegawa]

The funny thing is, this advice is better than most advice people give 😂😂😂

[@TheRealSandorClegane]

serotonin machine gun lmaoooooo

[@lilbabykitten]

found his photo in my 2001 school yearbook the other day... had a convo about him, now this is in my recommendations

[@juliankirchler9856]

One Ann Landers is out there crying right now

[@mr7oclock346]

1:11 The video says terrible dating advice, but that was actually spot on

[@emma-xt5iy]

Or double freak him out and shake him and say “let me innn leT ME INNNN”

[@robonthecob6920]

1:08 that Walk Hard reference though

[@ShBenEd]

I am entertained, good job

[@Yng_Roshi]

Truly a man of wisdom

[@PennsylvaniaPlinker]

Holy shit I had that same hoodie (except it was a shirt) like 5 years ago. I think it was made by Upper Playground.

[@michaelmccann5438]

So it wasn't a hoodie at all. Thanks for wasting my time.

[@johnnyjohn9961]

+hollowpointkid you are correct its designed by "dustin canalin"

[@johnnyjohn9961]

+DR Halll OMFG!!!! i had the same beach towel aswell , except it was my undies :-x

[@knotsocialmusic]

The E advice is really good, such a great experience, young, taking drugs and experiencing a great connection with someone on the same level. Its great as an adult but better younger.

[@jodiortego3266]

I wonder how the 2018 guy is doin

[@holyduck478]

The funny part that is not the worst but the best advice ever given to people who are in search for love.

[@brandonvass]

You know they can get vert

[@3xx0clan]

This is my favorite person ever and nothing can change that

[@ghostsoda7710]

Dude has two first names

[@simulationtheory8817]

This is so inspirational.

[@smorgjr]

LOL best advise ever really

[@matthijsblomjous3671]

2:00 I can confirm, we have great XTC out here

[@loubest3935]

Ann Landers is shook

[@doubledonkus7092]

Seritonin machinegun 😂😂 molly is a godsend

[@JohnBonini]

Jerry: I read it in Ann Landers. Guy: Oh, Ann Landers sucks!

[@davemustardstain6037]

The smog strangler

[@ostsweinen5240]

Dave Mustardstain You sir know your shit

[@JohnBonini]

ost sweinen Dave Mustardstain Alleged "strangler." I prefer to address him as Mr. Tobias Lehigh Nagy.

[@davemustardstain6037]

He always plays some kind of weirdo character

[@connorfalcon7080]

serotonin machine gun... pretty accurate, well said

[@lesaswain6835]

Step1. Magic Step2. Magic Step3. Magic Step4. Atheism

[@doubledont4949]

He was being 100% honest lol

[@jacksonb8123]

2:25 Until at least 2018....

[@MikeJones-gz9xz]

Well placed Ann landers dig. Even more intelligent is the pretending to not know that it was perfect placement and context. That simple exchange of mental awareness combined with the outward appearance of not knowing shows to me that Eric in fact has a very high intellect and iq.

[@gunner3437]

Check out the Eric Andre show if think this is funny

[@keatsgoodwin43334]

Completely different genre of comedy, but yes, bird up.

[@TripTea]

Marshall Math Hurts dude bird up was for real my least favorite episode

[@keatsgoodwin43334]

OllieNorthMK Well, for real, snail down.

[@TripTea]

Marshall Math Hurts for real loved snail down though.

[@keatsgoodwin43334]

OllieNorthMK "The best television show on television."

[@narmaniorange4186]

0:29 me expressing my love to someone who dosent feel the same way

[@coreyberg7823]

BIRD UP

[@Jacob-rz4uz]

My friends with relationship advise: Tell them how you feel Eric Andre: D O E C S T A C Y

[@finifug0l137]

Tell me if I telling the truth HE WILL BE A GREAT JOKER👌🏾

[@danthelowblood2653]

Seeing Eric Andre fairly normal is refreshing

[@parkerdinhwilliams15]

Ahahaha as a gay dude, I gotta say it really is that easy to get laid. That said, if you're looking for a long-term relationship, good fking luck. It's hard to find love in a gay bar and impossible to find casually in the "real"/much straighter world. I found it, but I got reeeaaaal lucky.

[@hahadasitmane]

+Parks Doge not srs man good job homie

[@dantssoapeim1969]

Gucci Mane fok joe

[@itskayla9735]

He told high schoolers to do ecstasy. A+ advice

[@ombligodeagua]

serotonin machine gun hahahahahahahahahah

[@operayl]

Busy. Oldest excuse in the book. Brutal honesty.

[@buffalosoldiers8874]

except all of his advice is solid

[@guilldea]

serotonin machinegun is the best definition of molly Ive ever heard