How To Deal with Feeling Lost In Life

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How do we know if we're making the right decisions? What can we do if we feel lost, like we don't know what our passions are and like we'll never feel fulfilled? What are we supposed to do with our lives!? 🤯
Well, in this video I share how I've been feeling a bit lost over the last 6 months. Since things have gone more back to normal and lockdowns seem (hopefully!) like a thing of the past (at least in many countries), I've weirdly felt more pressure to get my s**t together and work out exactly where I'm going in this lil' old thing called life.
So yeh - in this video, I share why you feel lost in life (or at least why I've felt a little that way recently). I then share 3 moments from the last couple of weeks that have changed my mindset for the better, and made me feel so much happier, less anxious and more at ease with where I'm at 🙌
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About Me
I'm a trainee lawyer, part-time KZbinr, son, brother, startup founder, boyfriend, black coffee drinker and plant dad. I graduated from Cambridge University (where I studied French and Spanish), topped my law school class and now work for a corporate law firm in London as a trainee solicitor (which takes up a lot of my time)!
Around that, I'm a big fan of discovering new ways of thinking, of balancing work with life, and of performing to the very best of my ability. Ohh, and being happy. And I try to share all that on this KZbin channel 😀
Fun fact: I believe we massively overplay the role of “natural talent” 😮 AND… I also believe that TOGETHER, WE ARE ALL CAPABLE OF POSITIVITY, PRODUCTIVITY AND SUCCESS.
📸 Instagram - / liam.porritt
🌍 My little kingdom - liamporritt.com
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[@liam.porritt]

Sign up for a free 7-day trial with Blinkist (today's sponsor) to start listening to and reading incredible book summaries, and get 25% off premium membership - www.blinkist.com/liam

[@davidmoniz3303]

@liam porritt ignore this if I’m way off but some of these video sponsors you use for your videos these days seem disingenuous and forced. I understand you wanna cash in but I think sometimes it contradicts or at utter least takes away from some of ur key video messages. Like I said just an observation as I’ve found myself scratching my head and skipping portions on a couple of ur videos pertaining to sponsors which appear completely irrelevant and almost give me a ‘throw a dart and see what sticks’ vibe

[@incorectlogin]

So true: when you're a kid you have default goals: get good grades, get to best possible school, get a first 'regular' job. But once your there: BOOM! There is no more 'default' you can just blindly and kind of mindlessly follow. You have to figure out what you want and who you want to be.

[@liam.porritt]

Exactly!! Couldn't have put it better myself :p

[@niachelidze7822]

Slow down you're doing fine You can't be everything you want to be before your time

[@tmy666]

It’s awesome to hear someone articulate this, Liam. Well done mate. I’ve quite literally just withdrawn from a new job opportunity that I ‘wanted’ because I used to want it and I think it’s a good move for ‘future me’….I withdrew at the very last minute (day of - doh!) when I realised that I am actually enjoying and getting ENOUGH out of what’s I’m doing now. This was the perfect time to hear someone say you don’t always have to be chasing something! Well done man!

[@dearjem]

this was such a good video. i initially thought i wouldn't relate as i don't feel lost in the sense of not having ideas for the future (i irrationally envision my life until the end from uni to career to kids etc😂🤦🏻‍♀) but ironically hyperfixating on future milestones kinda backfires for me because now, in the meantime/ present, i'm never satisfied because it's always the "next thing ... the next goal!!" and like your mum says just need to slow down and enjoy it tbh. i liked your "enjoy not being on a journey". I watched the pixar film 'Soul' recently and it kinda encapsulated this whole theme, would recommend :)

[@justjordiano]

A perfectly timed video. I only moved to Moscow in October and the war in Ukraine brought that exciting journey to an abrupt halt. Sanctions and businesses leaving meant I couldn't transfer GBP to RUB - I was working remotely and relied on that. Now I'm back in the UK and wondering about my next steps...

[@channiedhillon]

6:00 it is the search that makes one unhappy... It is the movement away from how things are that are making one unhappy

[@TheMisteracdc]

This was really sincere and thoughtfull! Tks for sharing

[@liam.porritt]

Glad it was helpful!

[@jaimedelmonte01]

What matters is your existence in this world. Listening to you is really interesting and makes me feel not to feel afraid in any of my decisions.

[@cherrylaurel4007]

Hey Liam. I'm 29 and feel extremely lost in life. Thank you so much for this video. The story from Voltaire helped me a lot.

[@michaell906]

Toward the end. I love how you talk about cherishing the moments. I’ve learned over the years. I’d rather spend money and time on experiences that allow me to be in the present moment and cherish that over buying things.

[@kmac7161]

When you spoke on now not having a clear cut path that college/ job searching created really hit home for me. I’ve fell into a bit of existential crisis’ at times now that I’m done with college/ finding my career job. You’re emotionally intelligent and sometimes it can cause some inside turmoil. At times I wish I can just turn my brain off and not feel guilty about being lazy.

[@tcproductions8766]

Thank you so much 💕💕 Your evaluation is going to make millions evaluate their MOMENTS ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@MDobri-sy1ce]

It’s kind of funny because when, I was a kid up until maybe my mid 20’s, I wanted to be done with school and have a career. However, seeing how toxic work culture has gotten the pendulum swung the other way. I love being a student! Learning, educating myself, and helping others. Also, having time for my hobbies.

[@phamtranucthang5495]

This video is the same as my situation. It's better to have a friend who enjoys the lost together

[@stevenbosch5925]

I can relate so much to the feeling of being lost. I just quit my study a month ago. I just did not enjoy it any more and I lost my interest in it. I was doubting for two months whether I should push through or take a step back. I am so happy with my choice to stop and take a gap year. Now I got time to pick jobs that I like that contribute to me not only in a financial way. Still I feel lost sometimes and get stuck in the 40hour workweek. I am saving up money to travel and really enjoying the moments I have some free time

[@jacquelinehayes9605]

Hey Liam. I really appreciate your honesty and being on this journey with you. The struggle is real and since I have been dong this a while, I know without a doubt that whichever job you choose, it should support your family values and faith. I did well for the most part during the pandemic because my family was safe, sometimes my girls were at home and sometimes at the university, but my job gave me the flexibility to do virtual visits and meetings, and gave me the time off I needed to support my family needs. When I did have times of anxiety I turned to my faith for comfort, answers, spiritual support and guidance. The right answer for you will bubble up and things will work out. Just enjoy your life and your answer will be clear.

[@BiGAAAAAAAAAALLLLL]

Also, you are clearly profoundly hard on yourself and very hard working. You have achieved a great deal - cambridge, clifford chance etc. Perhaps now is the time to simply revel in your accomplishments and live your life.

[@liam.porritt]

And definitely agree with this one to a significant extent, Alex, which was what I was trying to convey in the third moment of this video (from my mum) :)

[@snapsyphotoboothhire]

Love your videos bro, I appreciate the time you put into these with your hectic life.

[@jcjjfjgjgjgjfjfj5826]

Hi Liam, This video was super insightful - I love how you reflected on learnings from previous experiences which some may consider to be “trivial”, or “in the past, done.” It has inspired me to introspect more fully, and to challenge some of the misconceptions I’ve internalised over the past two years. On a wider note, I love your channel, and your videos have been a source of motivation over the past year as I slogged through the university admissions process. I look forward to seeing what else you have in store in the future - your videography rocks! Best, Ben

[@chayakim6279]

Hey, thanks for sharing your journey with us. Thanks for being consistent and honest despite of what youve been dealing with. Ive been struggling with my lawyer career as well and watching your videos has helped me a lot. You made me chose myself and my well being over my career. It was a hard decision but i think i have made the right decision to take a break from my work and take care of myself and i have to say, i am happier than ever so thanks again. I hope you'll find what you're searching eventually and that you'll bring yourself some solace and be at peace. All the best x

[@misssophie8530]

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and being so open! I could really identify myself with this stuff. Currently also trying to 'force' myself to enjoy life a bit more 😄

[@fallensilent]

I hadn't really made that connection with the pandemic waning, so very true!

[@sevan2853]

Ça m'a trigger d'entendre parler de Candide, car on m'avait forcé à le lire (deux fois !) pour les cours et mon bac de Français aha. Mais ce que dit ce livre et que tu rappelles est très vrai. Donc merci pour cette vidéo ! :)

[@kenc29]

Thanks for the cool video, I actually felt lost today and was wondering what I am doing with my life, then also come across this video!

[@liam.porritt]

Glad this was well timed for you!!

[@robertgill2509]

Really enjoyed this video Liam. As someone who does tend to procrastinate about most decisions in life (the small ones as well as the big ones) your tips on how to overcome this and decide on what decision to take sound really good.

[@joshl5919]

A lot of the people I know feel like this. I think people want to live more, that means being free and doing what they want to do. because Covid took some of our life that we had away

[@romansimms-dewijn6939]

This feeling of being lost in life is definitely something I've been feeling. up until now I have always had a next thing that I was working towards but I listened to my gut feeling to not go to university and I'm just letting life have its way with me other than try and control how my life goes constantly. This video really helped clarify those feelings.

[@channiedhillon]

9:30 think about what I really want... What you really want is for your "self" to be secure... But the self can never be secure.. It is made from thoughts and experiences and will never be secure. All your wanting to be lawyer.. KZbin.. Backpacks... Is all about wanting to be psychologically a secure self... But this can never happen as you are made from thought... Or who you think you are doesn't actually exist of and by itself.

[@michaell906]

I felt like that back when I graduated university. When you’re in school. You know what to expect and you know what the future is. It wasn’t until I graduated, that I was like okay now what. 😮😮

[@channiedhillon]

16:00 yes it's OK to be lost... Your mum is right.. You've achieved a lot.... Take it easy man. You are a smart smart guy... That work shit isn't everything... Find yourself a job with more leisure... Less cash is OK... You're young... Find out what life is really about...life might be when you are really living and you might really be living when life has no direction at all.

[@cassandra7778]

Thank you for this video Liam, it is really on time as now I'm just starting a contract position as a hr assistant with a international law firm even though my college education was not law related. Your channel really gives me the inspiration to start looking deeper into myself as I'm feeling pretty lost in life at the moment career wise.

[@stormdrops2232]

Amazing video. I can relate to a lot of this and think that your points are great!

[@lodersracing]

It's ok to make wrong decisions, it's important to give ourselves the freedom to make mistakes. It gives us opportunities to learn, grow, and put things right.

[@Introverted_Rn]

Ty. This really helped me

[@stupid22kathy]

thanks for making this video! It's super inspiring

[@stephanietancredi786]

A great video and one which I find SO relatable as a 26 year old at a similar life stage! Enjoy watching your content from here in New Zealand :)

[@emmasu6803]

Thank you so much for this video!! I’m currently at a stage in life where I have to make a huge decision if I want to study law again for 5 years or more in Germany and I felt like I was running away from making that decision. Also, I wish it would be easier to enjoy feeling lost but I guess we are all getting there :)

[@julianm.9089]

In welcher Stadt willst du Jura studieren?

[@emmasu6803]

@@julianm.9089 Weiß ich nocht nicht genau, versuche ich momentan herauszufinden. Warum? :)

[@user-qs5xp2ex4m]

Since I graduate university I exactly feel the same! Thanks for your insights :)

[@herryanil4669]

I think a lot of us in our early 20s feel the same way. Speaking for myself, at least I do!

[@anweshapandey7463]

Loved this so much....

[@channiedhillon]

4:50 choice itself is confusion

[@WarMatt86]

Liam your French accent is excellent 👌

[@liam.porritt]

Thanks so much Mathieu!!

[@liamdodoveci]

Me rn. Feeling like I just want to give up. I’ve been struggling with my trauma for a long time and my anxieties also. It’s tiring. I’m 21 with no job or no direction. I’m stuck.

[@kennethjoseph9309]

Love the video and I've watched you a couple yrs back and I must say you've earned a subscriber (I did it a few days ago). Believe me Liam I like how you approach stuff with an open mind and everything such as good organization skills, desk setup (love it by the way), and also have your work and personal life balanced. I have a question for you I want to pursue a degree in Business and I know there's different types. I want to do it in Management. I've graduated last yr in Associate of Arts, however, since I'll be 27 next month I want to know is it to late to get a bachelor degree at that age? Also in business management is there also laws that ties in with what you lawyers do or not?

[@cassandra7778]

Hi there thought I will comment . I'm planning to take a part time degree when I'm 27 years old I'm 26 now :) it's never too late

[@channiedhillon]

5:30 the ideal does not exist..the ideal is not a fact.

[@sophiefollowerofjesus]

Hi Liam, thank you for this video. I appreciate your thoughts and that you were vulnerable in sharing your personal anxieties, like concerning the future and having to make your own decisions. I have to say, I feel purposeful and settled in my existence/understanding of life, every day. I don't mean I don't ever struggle, or don't get anxious about things, but the overwhelming experience is that of safety, security, and purpose/meaning. I mention this not to boast, but because I want to share the reason for this in the hopes that it might help others. If something's this good, and is a baseline for my life, as opposed to me trying to work out purpose/meaning, find it, perhaps even hold onto it, it's gotta be worth sharing, right? Basically, I have a relationship with God, with Jesus. I am a Christian- as in, i am a Jesus Christ-follower. I feel God with me, helping me, all the time. I wasn't very well for a number of years, and couldn't function very well. I just started talking to Jesus, each day. I was angry at first- I didn't understand a lot of things. But a bit at a time, I felt God there with me, and I began to feel better an increment at a time, each day. To cut a long story short, I can now function a lot better, and feel more together, as a person who used to be very broken. I now give talks to people outside of church, people who may never have thought about or wanted to step foot in a church, so that I can tell them about Jesus, in the hopes they might know him too, if they want to. I know many people today see the Bible as old-fashioned or out of date, but I truly believe that it is inspired by God, and i literally can't get enough of reading it. Because, if I believe that this one book explains the truth about why we were made, and who made us, then this is the most exciting book to read! I know it takes faith to believe this, though, but I have found so much meaning for my life in reading the Bible- which tells us that we weren't an accident, made by chance, without design or purpose. We were made by someone, someone who made humankind just because he wanted to have relationship with them, and love them. Things went wrong, in terms of the first people he made rebelled against him, and the world’s never really made sense since then. There's so much suffering and seeming pointlessness, now. But Jesus, I believe, came to earth to be born as a human baby 2,000 years ago, to then grow up and die on a cross to pay for everything wrong we've ever done. This was so that we could be restored back to God, that he could be our Dad, and we could be his children, and one day live forever with him in a perfect new world (often simply talked about as heaven, but the Bible explains it to be a physical, yet perfect world, where things cannot ever fall apart again). So, I now have security and feel safe each day, as I know my eternal life is safe, and I have this restored relationship with God. I get to spend every day with him, in whatever I am doing. I believe, going back to basics, humans were created ultimately for relationship- with God their Creator, and with other people. We don't have perfect relationships at the moment, but God- who the Bible says is love- helps us to love other people. Not just as a gooey feeling, but to love people as he loves them... unconditionally. So, I spend every day living out what I believe is ultimate purpose- having a relationship with God, and asking for him to help me love those around me in many different ways. And of course, I spend time telling people about Jesus so that they too might know how perfectly loved they are, and that they can know who made them, and why they were made. I would love to know if you have any thoughts on this. But thank you again for this video. I enjoyed hearing your thoughts, and have enjoyed watching your other videos too!

[@jjjjjpppppbbbbb]

Have children and start a family. Trust me everything will fall into place.

[@itsyourtime6900]

How do you deal with loneliness?

[@BiGAAAAAAAAAALLLLL]

This question has not obsessed humanity throughout time. It obsesses 21st century people only. Consider you are a 16th century peasant. What do you do? You wake up, work, eat, sleep. You do not think about what to do, because to do anything else is inconceivable. Even consider that you are a 16th century monarch. You wake up, fulfil your duties as monarch, and then perhaps engage in some leisure activities (which affords a slight more degree of choice and therefore perhaps more so the existential question of 'what do I do'). I am not saying we should live as if it were the 15th century, I am just saying that this is a typically modern anxiety - we are overwhelmed by choice. When we can do anything, it is rather difficult to know what we should do. Here is a great video by Barry Schwarz, a professor of psychology, on the topic - kzbin.info/www/bejne/jICZiXiHfth2pa8&ab_channel=TED

[@BiGAAAAAAAAAALLLLL]

And your point about this existentialism being relieved during the pandemic is poignant - that weight was removed from everyone. What do I do? Well it doesn't matter, because I couldn't do anything.

[@liam.porritt]

Hey Alex - I take your point around the paradox of choice / this being a great source of anxiety. However, I would say that, while I agree most 16th century peasants probably struggled to think of much beyond survival, those who were better off definitely had time to think about what their purpose was. Back to 400BC (and further back), Greeks were thinking about how we should best spend our time - in the pursuit of pleasure (hedonism), trying to avoid pain (epicureanism), pursuing and sharing knowledge (platonism) - and it is fundamentally the same question now: what is the best way for humans to spend their days?

[@liam.porritt]

Ps, I will watch Barry Schwarz's video though, as agree this is a super interesting angle to this question! Thansk for commenting :)

[@BiGAAAAAAAAAALLLLL]

@@liam.porritt Apologies, I commented this before actually watching the video. It was more in response to the opening question: "what the heck are we supposed to do with our lives"? I suppose what I meant is that there is so much choice now - a million different careers, a million different specialisms within a career, and a million ways to spend one's time. When doing any of them, it is very easy to worry about whether you made the right choice. I think we are unique in our breadth of choice and that can cause huge anxiety - it certainly has for me. This is what Barry Schwarz talks a lot about. He also oversaw an interesting programme recently on channel 4 where a group of strangers committed to live like the Amish for a period of time - all were markedly happier. It is a puzzling world where there is so much choice. In some sense, freedom produces anxiety because of that choice. I think a lot of young people feel this way. Maybe there is also something in secularism and being the architects of our own future (as opposed to divvying some of that burden to God). Definitely an interesting and pressing topic. I have felt the same recently (I am on the path to becoming a solicitor). Thanks for the reply.

[@CPKESQ]

When are the Menos bags dropping ?

[@harryherman5371]

I see you leaving law to follow a freer path one day

[@PhilosophyWithLilly]

Liam, I have a question for you. I am an aspiring KZbinr and working on my law degree to become a corporate attorney. Much like you are doing now. At times, I’ve felt very strongly about keeping my attorney life and KZbin life separate. I was wondering if any clients have ever discovered your content, or if YT has affected your reputation at work at all? Or do you even care? I know a bit of a tougher question to answer. Thanks in advance!

[@liam.porritt]

Yep - clients have discovered by videos, and YT has affected my reputation at work. On the whole, I would say positively. Some initial concerns, but generally counteracted by the quality of my videos and my work as a lawyer :)

[@PhilosophyWithLilly]

@@liam.porritt Thanks for the response!

[@billcaan4192]

Islam is the only answer there is a reason its the fastest growing religion in the world even though the media hates us and life can in some circumstances be made harder by people. But it's the o ly way of life its the purposes and gives u real happiness in your heart. Being a lawyer or doctor is not the purpose of life no one on their death said wish I could have worked one extra day drafting a contract.

[@maxir.t4263]

okay so we didnt look for this video...it found us

[@janesmith9024]

I decided at age 14 - children (lots - and I did have a lot ) and legal career and I have been happy and am. I am very lucky. So advice - propose, get married, have children, look after and provide for them. That is your purpose (and lobby if you can so that we never again remove people's fundamental rights and liberties as we did during the pandemic in a way I was against from day 1).. I suppose ultimately we think we are free agents but are a product of our genes and upbringing and we become our parents however much we hope we won't at times...

[@aa1lop459]

i think you are too hard on yourself. Soon you will be making a video about quitting as a lawyer.

[@Thegrumpycoach]

You are a Kid, still! get back to your girlfriend as quickly as possible! life is too short.

[@makas01217]

Second!

[@aagusFTS]

1st comment :)