Why are MUSLIM parents putting SCHOOL over MARRIAGE?

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Why are MUSLIM parents putting SCHOOL over MARRIAGE? explores muslim marriage and modern muslim women being raised to be independent boss babes and men as well to put school over marriage and protecting their gaze. Many muslim parents will deny, reject or refuse their kids getting married and think that’s permissible in Islam for unjust reasons.
Timestamps ⬇️
0:00 Introduction
0:39 PROBLEM 1: Hormones and Zina
2:53 Islamic and Scientific Evidence
4:48 PROBLEM 2: Vicarious Parenting
7:49 More Islamic Evidence
9:45 My Views on Legal Marriage
12:41 PROBLEM 3: Suppressing Their Passion
15:38 SOLUTIONS
18:18 Conclusion
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#FaiyadFit #Muslim #MuslimMarriage #MuslimTiktok #Islam #SelfImprovement #Faiyad #The3Muslims

[@FaiyadFit]

🚨 1st Ep of my new MARRIAGE PODCAST ⬇️ kzbin.info/www/bejne/oJ7cln9_h69-Z5I My 1 on 1 Coaching ⬇️ faiyadfit.com My FREE FULL High Value Muslim’s Club Call ⬇️ kzbin.info/www/bejne/f3S6aZ6sfLp-hpI Instagram ⬇️ instagram.com/faiyadfit?igsh=MTlleDR0ZWtqZXVw LIKE, SUB & COMMENT YOUR THOUGHTS.

[@786halo]

we need smart women to raise good kids. not every woman is doing zina at university. USA is much worse for this than UK.

[@cocoo456]

I am forever grateful to my father for letting me get married at 17 to my husband 19 alhamdulilah. my father supported us. And my mother was absolutely against it. She refused to accept the reality and had no problem. what i was exposed to as long as I came home with good grades and finished college. I didn't finish college, I joined a corporation, and I worked my way up. Free of interest and free of debt alhamdulilah, 16 years later, we are teaching our kids. There are many halal ways to success.

[@oussamabekk1108]

MashaAlah Sister .

[@elelayn1242]

Mashallah sister you are so lucky may Allah protect you from evil eye

[@YDavis.]

May Allah bless your father and your marriage Ameen, love to see some good news in this crazy world

[@wotizit]

MashaAllah your father is wise

[@FaiyadFit]

May Allah elevate your father and family and yourself to Jannat al-Firdous and continue to use your story as an inspiration for other men and daughters out there, allahumma ameen

[@dilara8]

brother, marriage nowadays is a 50/50 chance of being wonderful or being filled with financial abuse and adultery. muslim parents aren’t in the wrong for wanting their daughters to have financial security so that their future spouse doesn’t threaten or abuse them with money.

[@dunnomynameso746]

Please put commas, I thought ''brother marriage'' ment marrying your brother.

[@dilara8]

@@dunnomynameso746 😂 good point

[@shimafathima9380]

Very true!

[@Bilel01Mechri-jm8gr]

All i hear is a common excuse. So My question here is well be at what age the woman gonna be when she finishes education and working to be ready for marriage ?

[@dilara8]

@@Bilel01Mechri-jm8gr it’s only around 22, 23…

[@bootsmade4walking]

I don't know why this issue isn't be talked about in every masjid in the West. This is a HUGE issue. I have so many muslim women friends with delightful personalities who very objectively attractive with PhDs, MDs or Masters. The pool of men for them is SO small, and yet their parents won't even let them consider a Muslim man from a different culture or ethnicity. It's shameful. Meanwhile, so many single muslim men would rather chase after white girls and maybe or maybe not marry them; and their parent's have no problem with it. May Allah guide us to the path of goodness.

[@YDavis.]

It’s not talked about in the Masjid because the Masaajid are full of parents who believe in this way. They would just nod their head and keep on doing what they want like usual

[@asharalam.]

Muslim women friends 🤨🤨🤨

[@tatooinenative860]

@@asharalam. op could be a woman.

[@FaiyadFit]

Tell me about it. I get the mob coming after me from my own people for my views. Alhumdulillah for those that are people of understanding

[@bootsmade4walking]

@@asharalam. I'm a woman 🎀

[@quaintrelle_2333]

Female, approaching her 20’s. I feel pretty scared of men. Please don’t get me wrong,I’ll explain: 1)I saw many men who beat,insult,disrespect their wives privately AND publicly, 99% of them being housewives. Idk,do men feel powerful that way? 2) Saw many men who do not like/ALLOW their wives to have money. Like, he spends his money for everyone and everything except his wife(except for providing with the most basic stuffs). And if she asks for money, he demands the reason.”Why would you even need money for? Isn’t providing foods and clothes for you just enough?” 3) Cheating. I am a strictly,fiercely loyal individual and would like to have my man just as loyal to me. Monogamy is NOT haram. I have nothing against polygamy but it JUST IS NOT for me. …do monogamous/loyal men even exist? 4)I want to be the first woman in my husband’s life,bc he’ll also be my first(i.e never been to any relationship-I’m strictly against it) Also, he shouldn’t have female friends just like I do not have any male friends. Never seen a male WITHOUT female friends. 5) Religious. No compromising on that 6) Someone who’ll actually care and understand me the way I want to be understood. And respect me. And healthy communications and boundaries. Never seen a marriage which has these. There are people who are married for 25 years and the husband doesn’t know what’s his wife’s fav color. I’ve been saving myself from all sorts of zina, but what’s the point? Good girls usually end up with irresponsible-smoker-playboy guys 🤦🏽‍♀️ while girls with infidelity and cheating habits end up with good guys

[@quaintrelle_2333]

At this point, i feel like I’ll never marry. Maybe I won’t have whatever good things marriage offers, but At least I won’t have someone who’ll constantly disrespect me. It’s just…the loneliness. It’s pretty unbearable. Everyone around me-some get married, some have crushes, some are in a relationship, some are even all three(astaghfirullah!)-and me being ever lonely, bc I’ll never pursue a haram relationship. Never. Silly me had a dream. Of having a tiny living place to turn it into a home and call it our own. Being fiercely loyal and having someone just the same. Being and having a safe space and providing support. Baking. Planting flowers-lots of them. I love them. Fluffy cats. Writing fantasy novels. Being protected by safe arms. What was I thinking? It’s all myth! So sorry for long comments-I ended up venting out. Sometimes my mind burdens me down, I need to get outside of my thoughts.

[@user-qx3yd6nk4n]

Sister i completely feel you. It feels like i myself wrote these whole comments. Even before i go to university, i wanted to get married because i knew that university is going to be tough environment. And i was right. Now I'm in university and it's extremely tough to go by. Sometimes people think I'm weird because i don't want to get close to men and be all friendly and stuff. However I'm trying my best. I only rely on Allah. I pray that he saves us.

[@DontOpenThisChannel]

Either trust your feelings and subjective experience and don't do what Allah wants you to do and live a depressing life or trust Allah and get married, the choice is ours. Indeed Satan threatens you with the worst outcomes and influences you towards immorality.

[@user-do1dc3qf3c]

@@DontOpenThisChannel Women I know DIED because of their abusive husbands. Where in the Quran does Allah allow that? These men are only Muslim in name, they do not follow the Quran. If she finds a man who has fear of Allah, good for her. But she shouldn't marry a non-religious man who refuses to follow Allah's word on family, haya, and marriage just for the sake of marriage. Allah doesn't want that.

[@bushraqaasim4677]

Dua, tawakul in ALLAAH goes a long way I use to be really scared of marriage because of all the bad marriages I kept seeing but I kept reminding myself and reassuring myself that ALLAAH will never leave me to my affairs. There are lot of good marriages and I know by the permission of ALLAAH i will be in a good marriage I won't allow the whispers of the shaitan prevent me from putting my complete trust in ALLAAH and also keep asking ALLAAH to grant me the best of nikkah that is built upon obeidence to ALLAAH and HIS pleasure and filled with lot of Barakah bliss tranquillity and everlasting happiness. You need to stop allowing the shaitan prevent you from getting married. Remember taqwa tawakul and Dua goes a long way. I ask ALLAAH to grant you a righteous and pious spouse who will be the coolness of your eyes and the warmth of your heart and be from amongst the leaders of the believers ameen

[@user-qx3yd6nk4n]

Brother i honestly don't know what to do anymore. As a sister, even before i go to university , i wanted to get married because i knew that university is going to be full of fitnah. And i was right. Now I go to university and it's extremely tough. Some of my friends give me weird looks or leave me when they realize that i don't want to intract too much with men or be all friendly with them. I'm trying my best to keep being pious. In my opinion, marriage before university is the BEST option. Plus, who said you can't continue your studies after marriage? It's even better, because it helps you not get deluded in the fitnah of college, knowing that you have your own loving person waiting for you at home. Literally all the people and relatives who saw me before college and saw how pious i am and wearing hijab, they all joking say that "oh don't worry, college will fix her." Because Literally all the hijabis that went into college came out without hijab. It got me extremely annoyed and i promised them that i will prove it to them that I'm not only going to change, but even get more pious. The good thing about my major is that i don't necessarily need to br present in the workplace. So If my husband doesn't want me to go to a free mixed place, then i can simply work from home and be happy. The problem is that i live in a country where people are either not religious, or they are Shias. And i don't want to marry either of them.😐 So even though i really want to get married soon, i don't think i will find any good husband in this country. I guess my only choice is to study and move to another country. But that will take a lot of time. Around five or six years.Maybe by that time i won't want to get married anymore. I honestly don't know what i should do. I only pray to Allah to help me.

[@FaiyadFit]

May Allah make it easy on you. I recommend staying away from haram absolutely regardless of single or married. So when you said you can have work options eventually that are not mixed or in person if your husband doesn’t want you to mix, you should be striving that even if you’re single. Don’t lose hope in Allah. Stay strong and finish without going NEAR haram and remember the promise you made to yourself that you’ll prove your family wrong when they said college will fix you. Stay chaste. Allah will put the perfect husband into your life in sha Allah when it’s time and just make dua everyday.

[@Layman3173]

May allah help you sister

[@user-qx3yd6nk4n]

@FaiyadFit Yes you're right. i'll do that brother. May Allah protect us all from the scary world we're living in.

[@thenightcorereaper]

may Allah keep you steadfast.

[@farahjichi4617]

You can't continue your studies when you are married because your husband can literally forbid you

[@Geppetto-fd5dy]

Asking and commenting only for understanding, if someone can assist: It unsettles me that the discussion around daughters here is that it may be dangerous encouraging them to get education/be independent etc... and she should rather focus on finding a good man to look after her (essentially narrowing down her options of what future to pursue) whereas the discussion around sons is focused on not projecting what you want onto them and letting them find their passions and live the life they want. This does not seem correct? Am I misunderstanding? Hope someone can clarify.

[@Noah-il6qn]

It’s a pardox, dark truth is that women need to secure themselves because this world is misogynistic and treats women like the side characters of a man’s life. I don’t make the rules, Muslims be acting like that too. but at the same time younger women are clueless and are more likely to get a divorce because they don’t know who they are and what is good for them. The real solution is to change our mindset and raise better men but people refuse to do so so they rather cope

[@reemaden6496]

I'm turning 20 this year and everytime i tell my people that i want to get married at 21 they make it seem bad that i feel like i shouldn't mention marriage to anyone

[@GHURABA_DUNYA]

SubhanAllah People these days Don't understand. Leave them,don't tell them anything. Pray to Allah Subhanahuwa Ta'Ala and do the right thing the halal way In sha Allah

[@fatimaahmadova8747]

I agree with most of what you said but restricting women to be housewives or getting an online education instead of getting an in-person education because of free mixing but not men is injustice. You do you, but women have the right and power to get the education they need and deserve. I know you said it is permissible for men to get an in-person education and jobs even with free mixing b/c it is their responsibility to provide for their families, but you can't restrict women. As a man you don't know what women go through, most men are not ideal. Women need to stand firmly on their foot and be independent if their husband is lacking, and they can't do that without education usually. Our ancestors struggled, and women need to have plans and an education so we don't suffer and go through the abuse and turmoil our ancestors went through. I am sick and tired of men thinking they have the authority to do whatever they please. We will not allow men to do anything mindlessly and harm women, it is cruel and goes against Islam. Most women can't rely on their parents either. Instead bring awareness to this topic but don't recommend secluding women to an online education or just relying on their husband. This is unsafe and leads to feeling of restriction and oppression. Islam gave me the full right to be independent and be highly educated. No women should be restricted just b/c of free mixing. It sounds pathetic. I understand we should lower our gaze and be mindful of the haram constantly surrounding us, but cutting off education is not the answer. Instead we should be disciplined and control our minds, instead of our minds controlling us. Because when you tell women to get an online education or just rely on their husband, we are not fixing the root problem which is our minds. First we need to control our minds, this is the only method to obtain full discipline.

[@Minaan2023]

Salam. I understand your point. As a man, I wish I pursued marriage earlier. I would love a wife to build a life with. I think women don’t trust men because they’ve been burnt too many times. This is our fault as men. We need to do better.

[@alisharaza8015]

First of all the point you made about "Women need to stand firmly on their foot and be independent if their husband is lacking and they can't do that without education usually". Did he ever promote sisters being jobless or to not getting education? He mentioned great alternative options such as getting the said education online. Those ancestors who struggled, and went through sufferings lived in an unfortunate time was a different time period and internet didn't exist back then. Depending where where you live, in muslim countries the universities and college were separated from the opposing gender, including staff and everything. The same rhetoric on blaming men and painting them as authoritative is very ignorant sister. The sisters too need to start being accountable for themselves instead of labelling them as controlling, instead of taking their naseeah and advice for the betterment of us. Nobody said or is promoting and importantly Islam doesn't allow the harm of women. If you believe what the brother is promoting is being deemed as "secluding women", then thats the problem with pure brain wired liberal mindset. Getting online education or women wanting to get education online, which is within the limits of islam is not restriction and oppressing them sister. While yes Islam gave you the full right to be independent and be highly educated, it also gave the boundaries to respect and follow and not be carefree like the westerners. "No women should be restricted just b/c of free mixing" sounds pathetic the average westerner or liberal mindset " muslim" but not a true follower of Islam who doesn't care about world things more than the sake of Allah subahanawatallah. May Allah guide you sister

[@Noah-il6qn]

@@alisharaza8015 Please be more realistic. many many marriages involve abuse and sadly men do get away with it, our societies are not that perfect. And Women don’t get Disney proposals form good men the minute they hit 18, many get proposals later on in life and many get proposals from sketchy men. Many women come from poor families that need their support and a lot of women offer to support a man just to get married. I would like for us as Muslims to be down to earth. And have more mercy and understanding towards each others conditions . stop making women who haven’t gotten a decent proposal feel awful or blame them for doing things like studying when studying is not a big of a deal. We can’t have these Muslim men mix with non Muslim women and marry them instead either while Muslims women hide at home without anyone seeing them. Men are not restricted or guided enough like women are in our communities to be left alone like that

[@youngbeauty6591]

i'm with u

[@frenzybuzz3703]

I will never get married!

[@binttahmet]

How to send this to my parents without sending it to my parents

[@FaiyadFit]

The age old question.....

[@mahbubanas1179]

Didn't know you have Bangladeshi roots man. Take love from this side and keep up the good work Brother❤

[@FaiyadFit]

Allahumma barik

[@Kaizo_6100]

I'm sad, that my parents even say "Do you have a girlfriend yet"

[@AbdAllah_54564]

Just tell them to get you married. Maybe they'd accept that over a gf.

[@FaiyadFit]

Many parents would have kids with degrees no matter how much haram they indulge over a pious halal life without degrees. And yes, we can have the latter and still be wealthy in sha Allah.

[@Kaizo_6100]

​@@FaiyadFit Inshallah, Furthermore, there are actual drug dealers on my campus who already got caught, I told my mom and she seemed to have little concern. I feel that my family genuinely just wants me to go to college and just that. Because she used to do it and she turned out fine. I honestly think that I'm not able to make decisions, and express myself like you said.

[@mimo4856]

Is this our fault as women or our parents? Our mothers and fathers have seen Muslim women in really horrible situations where they cannot stand on their own two feet and end up relying on their husbands who end up leaving them or abusing them - not all but many. Btw, getting married in this day and age is so difficult. Masjids don't help (it's never a topic discussed at the khutbah), parents/family and friends don't know anyone suitable, don't care (ahem ahem...my father) or if they suggest someone it's usually not what we are looking for (e.g. piety, attractiveness (this is very important too), financial situation, etc), dating apps are probably more harmful than beneficial... What is a girl to do than to educate herself and earn some money to support herself and her current family? If I wanted to be married, which I do, I would be...but it's a scary world out there and we gotta be careful. Our chastity is very sacred and don't want to waste it with the wrong man. It's a big life decision that could either make you or break you.

[@daprince001x5]

you tie your camel then have hope in Allah S.W.T

[@shadowthefirst5115]

Have twakul sister. Make dua and alot of tahjjud and get married asap, and have twakul. Please.

[@FaiyadFit]

This is the fault of men as the burden of maintaining the standard is on us. We failed as fathers by becoming complacent and the cycle continues. In sha Allah we can raise a better generation and fulfill our role.

[@hadilayyad6147]

@@FaiyadFitThank you for recognizing this. Many men in our religion abuse their authority over their women and kids and it’s very sad.

[@I.K1000]

Thank you so much! This is 100% how I currently feel like. I know it is sunnah to marry, but marrying a men/women that you know wont be good for you or your deen doesn’t help you at all. I would rather marry when I‘m older and find a better person than at a young age with somebody not suitable for me! Till then everybody has to fight doing zina and be on the right path of islam.

[@user-gc7pv7ok9x]

Getting married as women without education has become way too risky, nobody is willing to risk giving their daughter to someone who is too young to tell if he is gonna be financially secure or not, you can't tell if he is gonna use her need for him agenst her etc etc. I know that their is so many good men out there but im not willing to risk it, although it's all in the hands of Allah but still I think as women we learned our lesson, we need to have something to protect us from potential mess treatment by men.

[@FaiyadFit]

I completely understand the frustration and annoyance. Women have had it. But I want to remind you to not succumb to haram no matter what. Allah will never need you to do something haram to have security. Always remember that if you give up something for the sake of Allah, Allah will give you something better

[@user-gc7pv7ok9x]

@@FaiyadFit I get where you come from and i totally get it, getting married early is good for avoiding zina etc how ever it's IN GENERAL it is a very risky move that most women are justifiably not willing to take, husbands can be abusive, toxic, force you to leave school, die etc. As women, we are the weakest party in marriage, both physically and in terms of authority, so education is very important for women, as it is the only way they can escape and live a decent life.

[@Sandra-1wiq]

Facts

[@soubermed2175]

Speaking as if everyone around is being mess treated by men. That's a wrong way to think, and myay I add that majority of divorce are initiated by woman. The issue will never end if one always blame the other, pick a god fearing man over any

[@soubermed2175]

​​@@user-gc7pv7ok9xI'm not sure what kind of religion or part of the world you are in, but exaggerating like that " toxic, husband will kill you" all that is un islamic, it's always the song where you will pick the broken dude over god fearing muslim man. And when that one broken/cheat/harm you, obviously, the easier way out is to blame men at large. Khalas allah yahdeeki and stay to your self keep fasting.

[@PHX-576]

The economy isn't fair. Jobs don't pay enough for expenses. In order to be qualified for higher-paying jobs, you need a degree, which is a process that requires crazy amounts of money.

[@_.belladonna_]

Islam literally said have an education.

[@tatooinenative860]

they dont care. my parents would render me homeless if i decided to pursue marriage right now, even tho i finished undergrad Alhamdulillah and am in professional school. it seems they'd rather see me succeed in the dunya than the akhirah, even if i can succeed in both. plz make duaa for me.

[@AAquese]

Parents are sometimes hypocrites

[@spywalkz1]

@@AAquese i agree, parents only care about these stuff and not the true meaning of Islam.

[@oussamabekk1108]

​@@spywalkz1 True

[@tatooinenative860]

@@AAquese sadly

[@tatooinenative860]

Plz keep me in ur duaas. JazakAllah

[@m_shakes]

I married at 24. My only regret: not marrying earlier. But Subhan Allah his plan is superior.

[@RealCoachMustafa]

I was in my early 30s and I wasn't able to get married within my community I was living in at the time. I asked my sister to help find someone who's single and she said no one is available, even though it was a really large community. I finally get married to my wife who I met on a Muslim Matrimonial website. She relocated to live with me. She wanted to be part of the community, so she joined the Sunday School class for adults. She told me to join it too, so I joined. There are many women in the class, and I ask her how come the other women don't bring their husbands. She said, most of them aren't married. I learned that they were mostly around the same age as me, and they were deep into their careers. Doctors, a lawyer, a university professor. They can't get married because they're in their 30s and they're also picky because they make so much money. School and career should not take priority over marriage and family building.

[@FaiyadFit]

Astagfirullah bro may Allah preserve the community. And Jazakallahu khair for staying true to our intentions with dunya

[@SunnyCoding-cp5bh]

„They cannot get married“ is quite dangerous to say. It is all in Allahs hand. I know people who married at the age of 35-40. Remember that Khadija (ra) married our prophet (saw) at the age of 40. Just a reminder brother. Do not judge people.

[@o_-970]

They deserve it for being so arrogant and thinking they are really queens and princesses. In islaam we dont put false labels on things, we call it by the way it is

[@fatumahussein9604]

@@SunnyCoding-cp5bhKhadijah RA was a widow she was married before she didn’t wait till 40 to get married and she never put her career over marriage like Muslims do today Audhubillah and many Muslims today simply don’t want to get married but they never stay away from the opposite gender and still socialize and get with them, some even travel without Mahrams which is all haram! let’s not put Dunya over deen, People’s careers should never come first the Quran and Hadith does!

[@RealCoachMustafa]

@@SunnyCoding-cp5bh We're not allowed to judge if someone is going to heaven or hell, that's it. Only Allah knows our fate and whether we will be forgiven or not. Other than that, Islamically, we're called to judge others. We're not supposed to stand idle when people display self destructive life styles. We're supposed to enjoin good and forbid wrong. How are we supposed to do that if we aren't judging others? This whole "you can't judge me" argument is a modern day argument that secular people love to throw towards Christians because they don't understand what exactly God is the judge of.

[@Jenyuryuji05]

Im 18 currently and my grandfather told my parents is anyone asks about me(as in for marriage) to refuse and that i wont get married until i get a diploma. Honestly i don’t like the idea at all, i was looking forward to getting engaged and married, when will they understand that just because i get married doesn’t mean i cant study

[@FaiyadFit]

They won’t. This is most parents these days. May Allah protect us. Stay strong and make dua to Allah to aide you with a spouse soon.

[@Jenyuryuji05]

@@FaiyadFit ameen

[@youngbeauty6591]

i'm with the grandfather on this one getting married right after turning 18 is way too young getting married is not all rainbow and sun shine

[@pak2339]

Yes ofc it aint rainbow and sunshine but if he is mentally physically ready and mature for the responsability of marriage and fatherhood then no problem i have seen 20 year old 25 year olds grown men acting like teens or kids no maturity ur actions make u a man not ur age​@@youngbeauty6591

[@User_47536]

@@youngbeauty6591 brainwashed by kuffar ideology

[@halalme]

Thanks a lott bro for talking about this topic . It is the most important but sadly neglected topic . I am 19 and wanna get married but here in desi families it has become a culture even for girls to get their degrees first and then get married , they don't care about their daughters and sons getting in haram relationship and sadly parents know about these relationships but they don't tell them to get married they want them to get independent first . I don't wanna get involved in haram relationship and it has become so difficult for me to focus on studies or anything. I have literally lost all my focus and my downfall in studies is even worse. To everyone who is reading my comment , Please make dua for me brothers and sisters .

[@FaiyadFit]

May Allah allow us to break this cycle. Stay strong bro. What’s your experience been?

[@halalme]

​@@FaiyadFit Brother Faiyad , I am a sister not brother 😅. My story is too long the first thing is that I want to get married because you know it is hard for us in this age of fitnah to stay away from haram relationships which is everywhere, and we see Muslims in it and they don't care about the fact that it is wrong, but I don't wanna get into it. The second thing is that I really don't have the guts to tell my mum that I wanna get married , because I am still studying and maybe according to them I am still young for it but it is difficult for me to stay away from haram and they should understand this and there are many haram things other than haram relationships which are major sins and one can get indulged into it if he/she doesn't get married and really I have seen almost all the people in my age who are in this like ( corn and stuff like that). If I talk about this , the whole week will be less for it . And the second thing is that my family wants me to become a doctor and I wanna study Islam and I really don't wanna become a doctor because it will take a lot of time,and how am I gonna survive this without getting married, and the doctors really don't have time for anything not even for their kids and I as a Muslimah want to take care of my family and raise good Muslim kids . Most of the people will say that you are a person with old thinkings but it is what it is . I have already said this but this is what makes my condition worse is that because of these constant thoughts of haram stuff like which are haram outside marriage, it has become difficult for me to focus on anything, and about my downfall in studies it's the worst.

[@Minaan2023]

@@halalme Salam, speaking from someone who has been through this, if you want to get married, then get married. Pursue your dream of starting a family. A family provides a more long-lasting stability than a career or job.

[@Layman3173]

​@@halalmeSubhanallah sister, may allah help you and helps us all overcome this big fitnah from nowadays. Always remember that allah is testing you xD

[@meenharl]

​@@halalme I'm facing the exact same situation, I come from a desi family and everything you described really resonated with me, plus the man I want to get married to is from another ethnicity which is another big problem for them, but I must say he's a very good Muslim mashallah and I really want to get married to him, but because I'm young (almost 18) , my parents think im immature and not yet ready to decide for myself, this really frustrates me, but they really don't realise how can save us from many haram sins, May Allah listen to our duas , ameen

[@justaquariums4095]

I would say whatever we do we need to be equipped with a lot of islamic knowledge. It didn't affect me at all going to uni and i found i was able to keep myself safe and to my self. Infact after i got married i found that my in laws had no barriers and brother in laws were a bigger issue for me than any time spent at uni or school. Esp given that my in laws found it normal to ask me to take a ride in a car with a brother in law and when i said no i will go with my husband they found this hilarious and said ooooh are you in love. People that are uneducated are a lot more dangerous than those with education. I found thag when i graduated i did not have to shake hands as i informed the uni of my beliefs anf i found they had a better attitude than some Muslims

[@FaiyadFit]

Highly disagree with this. People that are educated ISLAMICALLY are better than those that are uneducated ISLAMICALLY. However, when it comes to secularism it bears nothing because a secularly uneducated person is way better if they're islamically based than the counterpart

[@habiibiia]

Thank you for spreading awareness on this topic. I have been noticing this major issue as well, and it’s great to see someone finally address it.

[@FaiyadFit]

Jazakallahu khair. Do you have any other topic ideas you feel need to be addressed?

[@farahjichi4617]

Awareness... Marry off girls at 16 with no education

[@alisharaza8015]

@@farahjichi4617 stop being ignorant

[@tasneem1805]

I really learn a lot from your videos, as a young Muslim living in the USA. Your videos are VERY educational and helpful. May Allah bless you and reward you. I just found your channel recently and it's on my top list of fave channels on KZbin. Just have a pure intention, as a reminder, when making these videos. Allah سبحانه وتعالى will reward you

[@FaiyadFit]

Allahumma ameen and Wa iyaakum pls give me future video topics

[@sarahg7554]

​@@FaiyadFitsalam alaikum brother can u plz talk about how to stop wasting our time on nonsense/ how to control ur self n desires

[@viper3d11man8]

Bro I’ve been TRYING to get married for over a year now, I’ve been using those Muslim marriage apps, going to my local mosque, asking my parents, and nothing has come from it. I’m burning on the inside, haram relationships are becoming more and more appealing to me because it’s so much easier to get into as opposed to marriage. Everyone who I have come across either has crazy mehr requirements or wasn’t serious to begin with wasting my time. I’m genuinely becoming so fed up at this point. I don’t even mind if my wife would be a revert. Please make dua for me.

[@imna2122]

Okay so you want a wife so you can have sexual intercourse and not even caring about the person you're going to marry? You're going to be with a whole entire human being. Try to learn self compassion and treat yourself better. Fast to decrease the desire. Don't rush just because of your sexual desires. What are the crazy meh requirements that you got by the way I'm curious. Be intentional about the person you're going to marry. Because it seems immature to just marry to have sex ngl

[@FaiyadFit]

May Allah grant you a pious wife soon. Just have sabr and tie your camel everyday

[@L-Lawliet14]

Dont fall in the devils trap.

[@hamnarajput2175]

May Allah ﷻ grant you a righteous spouse soon Ameen remember if Allah is delaying your marriage it will have goodness in it for you and try fasting more

[@UrmomdotcomYT]

“I don’t mind if mine was a revert”Is crazy. Now I see why it’s hard for me too as a I revert.

[@tahu6175]

Eye opening video❤.. Also many women get their degrees, phds, masters and what not... After having a job providing sky reaching salaries, their kids are neglected so much in matters related to deen and aakhirah that they just remain a muslim in name. It's not wrong to pursue our passion.. Even hz. Khadijah was qn extremely successful businesswoman. But, set priorities in your life.. First deen and then dunya.. Allah commands us to excel in both worlds. What's the use of so many degrees and heavy books when one doesn't know the ultimate goal of life, why were we created, where will we return? And remember allah doesn't tell us leave this world and sit on prayer mat for whole day. Rather, deen and dunya needs to be well balanced. May he grant us success in both worlds...Aameen!

[@FaiyadFit]

Allahumma ameen. May Allah empower us. Those kids raised by 2 parents that barely give them time are definitely going to be raised by something. Whether it’s the internet or school influences.

[@NadiaValary]

Jazakh Allahu Khairan for touching on this topic. Subhan'Allah it's all upside down nowadays. I'm 18 and Allahumme Bareek I met a great pious Muslim guy who is also 18 but has his own job and mature enough to go under the responsibility of marriage and right after we decided to get married I told my parents about it. My father is giving me hard time now and telling me how it's not the right time as I'm allegedly young and have to focus on the college. Subhan'Allah how nowadays as kids we are the ones that need to convince the parents. I really pray Allah SWT opens his eyes and softens his heart and all the fathers of the Ummah who are away from all the realities you listed in the video. May Allah guide the Ummah.

[@Mahfuz1034_]

Man like Faiyad! Smashed it again! My ocachhhhhh🎉

[@Saratonin_578]

So what do I do? As a muslima in her third year of university studying engineering. Do I quit school and get married? Am I sinful for continuing education in a mixed university?

[@JDNR30k]

No you are not sinful for doing education. But you can study whilst being married

[@FaiyadFit]

Are you genuinely asking this bc you’re reevaluating everything or just bc I said so? At this point if you’re deep, esp with loans and almost at the end, finish and then live a halal life and don’t free mix. Bc otherwise you’ll leave with debt and no degree. Focus on finding a good husband in sha Allah. And consult a scholar for questions such as if you’ll be sinful. May Allah make it easy on you sis.

[@A.J.y2]

I am a Muslim woman (16) who is currently working to save up for college. I have a question what if it’s not my parents decision for me to go to college and get a career but it’s rather my own. I don’t want to get married solely because I am asexual and don’t get temptations at all, I am currently going to a free mixing pubic high school and this had never been a problem to me. Since I don’t want to get married would it be better for me to get a college degree and a job as a nurse, doc, etc

[@FaiyadFit]

I would question where you got these beliefs from. Watch this kzbin.info80vdZff0bVE?si=88MuWktc-rfWtjs_

[@RaiShamis]

Thank you for spreading awareness of topics that are seen as “unnecessary” brother.

[@user-ho6pj4lj2p]

Assalam Aleykum, I (f) just turned 17 and I lived in Germany since I was 1yo so I don’t know any thing else instead of this culture. I try sooo hard to be a good Muslim which means wearing right hijab in Highschool and not having any man on my social media etc. Now my question is how should I do it with my future? I want to study pharmacy but for that I need to change cities and live there alone and go to university. I know it’s haram but is it okay if I have a reason ? I want to help my parents when I grow up and I don’t plan to „become the man I wished for“ when I get married I’m okay with staying at home bc we fr I need to educate my kids before school teaches them wrong things but like if my husband got into financial issues I still have a degree and can help him yk. It’s better if Im educated and more qualified to help if necessary. I don’t plan to do anything haram in college I mean if I survived high school until now college will be the same in sha Allah if I keep my bound with Allah. I really want to make my family proud bc imagine I don’t get a nasib and then I’ll be just a burden for my dad :( I would really appreciate any advice I’m so indecisive rn Jazakum Allah khair

[@FaiyadFit]

Walaikum Assalam Warahmatullahi Wabarakatu sister, Firstly, May Allah SWT make it easy on you and your family. My best advice would be to understand that nobody "plans" to do anything haram in college. This is one of the tricks of shaytan, it's to get you to a lesser haram to eventually incite you to greater harams. I understand you want to protect your family and make it easy on them but as a man I can NEVER NEVER NEVER allow my daughter to put herself in haram just to help me out lol. It is ABSOLUTELY not her responsibility and I will see thru till the end that she doesn't. NOTHING is worth you going to a mixed environment with others that are in their prime sxlly to just get a degree to chip in to your family or to be a crutch in the off chance your husband can't work. These are exceptions. I would recommend learning a high income skill from home like taking IT courses on udemy or what not because nothing would justify haram. Protect yourself and focus on Allah. You don't do anything haram because the nasib will be from Allah. And Allah won't need you to commit anything haram to earn it.

[@lunarsoles]

What you trying to learn Broski?

[@Aksarallah]

@@user-ue9ic1pk7p there are many online platforms and even online schools. You can see coursera or udemy. Those two are good. I got employed after highschool learning from those

[@a.90129]

get a degree, these same men spouting that women should stay home are the ones that will beg the hospital for a female doctor for their wife, these professionals aren’t made by staying at home. also, no one is going to force you to do anything with the opposite gender, im a first year at university and i havent even had to talk to the opposite gender

[@habeeba.1533]

I was really upset when my parents didn't show any intrest/ignored me when I told them I wanted to get married at 20 but now I understand why. Stories after stories of women being left off/abused by husbands and women not having any other support left for them. My parents wanted to make sure I'm secure. Now that we've started looking, I'm genuinely terrified of what's gonna happen. May Allah forgive us.

[@bea2739muslimah]

U talk about very important and controversial topic no one wants to talk about. The parents really don't care if their children are involved in haram. Its like pushing your child in hellfire. So many youngsters nowadays want to get married in halal but thet recieve the biggest pushback from their parents alone. Marriage is supposed to be easy, when we make it difficult, zina becomes common and easy.

[@mohamedswaray470]

Brother I love ❤️ your channel, it's educational.

[@Uzair_Of_Babylon465]

Great video keep it up you're doing amazing things 😁👍

[@FaiyadFit]

Allahumma barik may Allah allow me

[@solution42]

I'm 29 now and still single. When I was 19 I wanted to get married to a man I thought I was in love with- my parents didn't allowed me to and I still talked to him till I was 25- 5 years of haram, I don't know how Allah will forgive me for this. At that time when I was 21-23 aunts used to visit us for thier sons and my mother immediately turned them off without asking me- I was in a "relationship" but sill she never asked me if I was ok with it. So now I'm single can't find a person to marry and guess what my mother calls me that I'm old and no men wants me. Reality is men get married very quickly and there is hardly any men left at their 30s - it's either their 2. marriage or they want just hang around. I guess I will be alone till death.

[@Minaan2023]

Your parents are to blame for this. Let me guess, your from a desi household? Don’t lose hope, take massive action and explore every option in looking for your partner. Your not too old, you never are.

[@Kepler10b]

I plan to go uni in September to study astrophysics bc I want to become an online tutor. I'm not trying to be some boss babe type... I just want some of my own money so that I don't have to rely on my future husband to give me an allowance which btw most guys out here can't afford to do anyway cause we're in a cost of living crisis and most guys are kinda broke. I'm not worried about the whole free mixing thing because it's not going to be any worse than high school lol. If I can survive the boys at my high school, i can survive uni.

[@FaiyadFit]

Interesting mindset. If you can prevent riba and you’re living at home while in uni and only go for necessary classes and avoid mixing then sure. But your mindset is already “so I don’t have to rely on my husband for allowance”. It should be to find one that can, and as men we caused this issue to begin with. Pray istikhara though before anything

[@Kepler10b]

@@FaiyadFit yes I plan on living at home so it won't be much different than going to school. I don't actually have to pay any of my loans back unless I earn above a certain threshold which I don't plan on doing as I only- want to tutor part time. The UK allows this flexibility and it's great. With all due respect brother, I don't think you understand that the majority of guys are pretty broke and they absolutely cannot support a family or even rent a decent apartment on a single income. Financially well off men are actually the minority and we can't all have a man like that. Most muslimahs end up with average guys and if we want things for ourselves we're going to have to pay for them ourselves because the man isn't going to be able to do it.

[@Minaan2023]

⁠​⁠​⁠​⁠@@Kepler10b Salam, Muslim Man from UK whose also looking for marriage. Your right that men at struggling to financially provide, this is why I’ve pursued entrepreneurship, and building an online business. Have you thought of making money online? I’m looking for a wife and I plan to maintain her with businesses on the side, as well as my job

[@meenharl]

Assalamualikaum guys, I'm facing the same situation, im young and want to get married to someone, but my parents do not agree because he don't have a job and they want to send me to university, and according to them I'm just distracted by all this and i should stop talking about it, and focus on my studies, guys please pray for me so that i get married young and for Allah to provide him with halal Risq ameen

[@hamnarajput2175]

Same bro I am trying to get married young as well, I tried with someone before and they were not well for me and allah swt showed me from istikhara alhamdulilah, and then I really liked someone and felt as they liked me, however they had rejected me. Now, I am trying to better self as a muslimah of course, But I have to agree it gets difficult many times. With the fitnah out here. Also everybody has a different atmosphere as well and everyone has maybe a less desire for a spouse as well, and thats okay. But I learned to NOT give up on allah swt and just control yourself I guess.

[@hagarmaatougui4658]

I have talked to my mother about this and inshallah as soon as I turn 18 (this year) she will talk to my father and start looking for a good muslim man. May Allah swt help us all finding righteous spouses.

[@hamnarajput2175]

@@hagarmaatougui4658 Ameen sister pray for me too

[@meenharl]

@@hamnarajput2175 may I know how you realised your istikhara came out negative?

[@meenharl]

@@hagarmaatougui4658 mashallah tabarakkalah!! I hope you find a good spouse Ameen

[@samia6888]

Wish I would have married back then, I am 33 now. I’m too scared to even try because I just know the men want younger women. If you are a woman (or even a man) in your 20s or even 18, please take marriage seriously. Get married and then go study. Once you turn 33 like me, no one will want you. Only Allah can give me the right man and that is enough to calm my broken heart. When Allah says “Be” it will be no matter how hopeless the circumstances look. It’s just when you are in your 20s (women, not sure about men) you have more options and a greater chance to get married.

[@RedaReda-vl9ff]

I wish you success and happinness in your life,dont give up,have a really nice day

[@samia6888]

@@RedaReda-vl9ff thank you, may Allah bless you for your kind words.

[@CheckMyPlaylists]

May Allah Sub'hanahu Wa Ta'ala grant you more success in Dunya and Akhirah bro❤️🤲

[@FaiyadFit]

Allahumma ameen

[@larosenoirek2197]

You made very good points but the reality is that we live in the west. Lots of Muslims brothers and sisters work in mix environment. As human we also need to have self control and focus on what’s important. I got to work in mix environment, do my job and go home. I work 12 hours in healthcare and I can’t care less about about how my male patients or male doctors look like. I have to make a living. It getting hard getting married and I have seen lots of sisters in bad situations in their marriages. I am grateful for my education and if I had waited for a man I probably would be starving by now. I fully care for myself both parents died. Prioritizing education was a blessing for me.

[@maryam28067]

jazakallah bro, u always come up with such underrated and neglected topics which are very important to discuss in this ummah. can u pls do a video on people who are obsessed with celebrities and bands like BTS and who follow the music industry etc, those who go to concerts and what not. Allahuma barik

[@FaiyadFit]

New video topic in sha Allah.. what specific points do you suggest I target

[@Nightmare-pn7wj]

​@@FaiyadFitbro this is actually a big problem here in Bangladesh. I see niqabi girls and I say Masha Allah only to see a few seconds later that they are wearing a BTS Mask -_- They even have a whole group where they discuss everything about them and obsess over them. But almost 80% of the girls you will see, will have a niqabi profile picture. You can talk about that but I have another suggestion for you. You talked about women's education right? So, I see these new Islamic Boss Babes that are appearing in the social media circle. Again, Niqabi Women, but they brag about how successful they have become in their business. A lot of women might be influenced by this in the wrong way and think that they should also be successful as a woman. One woman even said made a video saying, *"My parents wanted me to get married to a CEO, so I became one"* something like that, and many Muslim women joined her group and they were saying like, "We Muslimahs are independent, we don't need to marry anyone, our parents can't force us" etc. To be honest, I don't think any man would be more attracted to them if they heard they were a CEO or whatever... Lol I think you should make a video on that because Muslim Women are losing their femininity and becoming more Masculine...

[@hassan021]

​@@FaiyadFit tbh idk how you could address this topic without it coming across negatively but the amount of women (including Muslim women) who idolize male celebs to such a crazy extent is ridiculous. like brother @Nightmare-pn7wj said, there's hijabis and niqabis who you'd think are pious but they have BTS phone wallpapers or some crap. many of them are married but you see them thirsting over male celebs out in the open on social media and other Muslim women are supporting them and joining in instead of doing the opposite. ofc it's not all women, which should be obvious, but it's something that's pretty much never addressed, not by any influential Muslims anyways

[@maryam28067]

@@FaiyadFit people who obssess over BTS to be specific like those dudes even spread islamophobia over one of their songs.. and also about people in pakistan, india and bangladesh, they listen to "nohays" (songs based on mourning over hussain r.a when he was martyred in the battle of karbala) during the month of muharram. People think that this stuff is alright and not haram altho their nohays/songs contain these beats in the background. You can also add some points like how music started from the time of prophet sheeth a.s and how it leads to zina and other stuff. and also u can talk about people in the muslim countries, they play songs in weddings etc. In fact, in pakistan, u might know about a function called "mehendi" before the wedding day, this function is primarily based on dances and songs and even free mixing!! this is a serious issue bro and sadly whenever i bring up this topic to talk about with my family, they just ignore me as if it isn't a problem and that it is alright.

[@bluemacaroons]

@@hassan021you don’t know how hard it is to even make friends thinking if u have muslim friends they’ll stay away from these things but they don’t and when you say anything ur the bad one. Its either join the group or be a social outcast everyone thinks is really rude but ur just trying to avoid sins.

[@user-ku9ik3hh8w]

Thank you for this eye-opening video JazakAllah kheir

[@FaiyadFit]

Wa iyaakum

[@artemisrosewood]

This cannot be more resounding than ever. I do not live in the West, but because the culture and proclivities of Non-Muslims are so embedded and permeated in an average Muslim on Social Media, almost everyone has a Haram relationship or not acquiring a good Islamic knowledge. Parents are exhorting on education and careers, but dismissive on religion and obtaining that peace and reliance on Allah. Nowadays, the worldly life is placed in a higher importance than the life after. May Allah help us all to be informed on this.

[@TopG20073]

Man look, for women it is complicated. Study enough to be educated but not overboard. But for men I kind of disagree. Say a man wants to get married at say 18, I m not saying it is wrong, BUT let him feel the pressure alone atleast till 23 so that he can handle his part of pressure in a marriage. Yea sure we desire (company) more than women, but life is divided between wants and needs. At some age, it becomes a need.

[@txfu-]

Alhamdulilah i will be starting college online next semester, i never thought about free-mixing in these views! Good thing I’m going to be doing online 😂

[@TRYno397]

I am a 19 year old man and ever since i was 15 i remember i wanted to get married to a girl and have a halal love life with her not only sexually but even just as partners being there for each other and stuff like that but unfortunately my family where using tradition more than religion in this matter and they expected me just to stay halal until i get a degree and work and stuff even tho i felt miserable specially when i know that my parents went through the same thing yet didn’t use their experience to improve on the grandparents mistake and let young males and females like myself get married instead of dating which is haram…. when i was 16 i started becoming more serious in learning the religion and it all clicked i was right i am not in the wrong for wanting to marry at 15 and i told my parents even tho i know the financial situations of the family didn’t allow it but at least they should’ve educated me and told me that marriage at 14 or 15 is a good thing instead of me dating and doing haram and that if i found a girl that accepts me with my financial struggle so that we both stay away from haram then it’s good 👍🏼 but leaving me confused and expecting me to stay halal hurt me and made me feel confused,angry at the clear double standards and most importantly alone. But it’s all good my parents are good people الحمد لله and they admitted it was a wrong choice and of course i would forgive them even if they don’t acknowledge it was a mistake cause i love my parents they’ve done soo much good for me and sacrificed a-lot now i am trying to stay focused and not loose my self to haram and improve myself as muslim so that i can be a good husband to a good wife and also trying to improve my financial situation. The non muslims try always to demonize the strict muslim husband but most of my friends (meaning males ofc) that are trying to follow the religion seriously when i talk to them about this problem since most of us suffer from it, they are one of the most romantic individuals ever the way they speak about the wife they imagine telling me that they would take care of her and try to provide for her to make her a happy spouse not because they are simps (even tho i don’t like using this word) but because they would be judged by Allah on how they treat their wives and also they tell me how having a good wife will help to encourage each other to perform prayer and read quran and do the sunna, and telling me how even tho they fear the responsibility of kids since there is soo much haram they worry about how to raise them but regardless of the fear they will be brave and be responsible for any kid that results from the marriage. Of course these man i am talking about are muslim man that are very competitive when it comes to the religion even tho they might have shortcomings they are constantly challenging themselves to become better muslims so that if they find a good muslim wife (not a muslim women influenced by the feminism movement) that raises their kids and becomes his partner that he relies on to manage the big project called a family he would not hurt her by being a bad muslim and hold her back from improving and making the kids have a good muslim upbringing and collecting good deeds and improve overall when it came to matters of the religion. Love your content i am your muslim brother from morocco.

[@zaynamtk4483]

I am also 19( a girl ) and I would say do not lose hope we are still young and insha'Allah you will find that girl and marry her just have sabr :)

[@iffy_x]

this was a really insightful video. I’m from the UK and I was thinking about how the majority of men are looking for a women who is in work or has an education and not having that is a ‘no-go’ for a large majority of Muslim men and also women looking to get married. As a women I understand it’s preferred not to work and free mix but I feel as if in this society your almost forced too. As long as your intentions are pure and you are strictly working to make ends meet especially in the UK as we are going through a cost of living crisis won’t Allah forgive us?

[@yugiohmasterduel8789]

In response to the title, I guess because they can be afraid of the husband letting her down at some point or even her parents die. They want for her to be able to take care herself after such a thing and provide for herself. A solution IMO can be getting married and keep studying, also, educating women about how to keep a household and educating men on how to take care of the family, because Islamically, the women wouldn't need to provide for herself if her male relatives take care of her.

[@Maria-rm2ov]

can you please make a video about points that women do that are imitating men and another on what to do/not to do to become/be a woman with super hayaa. Thanks for this video (made me realise many things that have been going on now)

[@Noah-il6qn]

Women don’t imitate men though, very rare cases

[@rana_360]

Assalamualaikum brother. I am from Bangladesh ❤❤

[@justaquariums4095]

In regards to zina also i am aware of 2 women. One fully covered with even her face covered. At home all the time. All her family went abroad and she was alone at home. Her husband also abroad. She was cheating on her husband with a young non married muslim man. Another woman also cheating but was working and cheating on husband with a colleague - this one was called up on this and her reply was what am i supposed to do I'm in a forced marriage and don't love my husband. So anything can happen anywhere and anytime regardless of staying home or going out. This is why its important to have true faith and always be aware Allah is watching.

[@FaiyadFit]

Disgusting. Men and women who ch3at on their spouse are fr trash and should've divorced. May Allah forgive us

[@GrimOverIord]

I never knew you were Bengali brother, Nice to know we are from the same country!

[@MindfulMuslim33]

Akhi, please don't music in your videos. Just advising you for future videos. I hope you understand and please refrain from using music in other videos as well. Outside of that, informational video. It helps a lot when you say things that many people don't want to hear. May Allah forgive your for your major and minor sins. Keep going with you content akhi!

[@MuhammadYeasinFaiyaz]

Assalamualaikum, bro where do you live? I get your notifications right when I'm free. How?

[@FaiyadFit]

America CST

[@MuhammadYeasinFaiyaz]

@@FaiyadFit Bro you moved from Bangladesh?!!!!! I didn't expect that. I thought you're an Arab. Now I understand why I can relate to u more than other Muslim creators. I moved from Sylhet to Montreal 🇨🇦

[@FaiyadFit]

@@MuhammadYeasinFaiyazAlhumdulillah bro but we're all one ummah!

[@MuhammadYeasinFaiyaz]

@@FaiyadFit Sure. May Allah bless u

[@RedaReda-vl9ff]

​@@MuhammadYeasinFaiyazi wish you paradise my brother in islam

[@coatch_ebrahim]

hello brother fayad so i go to a mixed university and i cant change my uni and i cant get marriged right now is lowering my gaze the best thing i can do in my situation?

[@YourAverageGuy786]

is it possible for yu to do a video on jamaat

[@FaiyadFit]

In sha Allah

[@shifailyaschauhan]

Very profound

[@hba4357]

I'm a Muslim parent of two boys who are of school age. Even if they were girls, I wouldn't dream of them being married first. They need to have an education first and then they can think about marriage. This is the 21st century and Muslims should adapt. If we're being brought up in western society, we cannot avoid mixing with the opposite gender. It doesn't mean we have to go and do things with them. There are a lot of Muslim men who don't provide for their wives and children (or care for them for that matter) so what will an uneducated woman do when he leaves them or dies? It's the parents responsibility to educate their children when young and talk about such things. Suggesting online courses for girls isn't feasible, particularly in the western world. How is a girl going to learn to be a teacher or a doctor etc by sitting at home behind a screen? Women aren't cattle waiting to have multiple babies whilst their husband goes to work, socialises with friends etc. No where does it say that women cannot be educated and must sit at home. Why shouldn't a woman want a husband who is on the same intellectual level as her? I've seen a lot of comments here from people saying they are 18 and and want to get married. Why do they need to get married at 18? In my view many 18 year olds don't have the maturity to take on the responsibility of marriage and children at such a young age. They need to grow into adults first. I speak as a mother in my 50's. I've seen many Muslim women who are treated as anything but cattle and cooks where their opinions don't matter but they have the intelligence to do so much more.

[@comedyalbums7202]

I pray that ur husband is well alive, feel sad for him and pls tell ur children that marriage is a choice not a Nessesity, I also as a man don't want to marry a women who will use me for my cash iam happy single independent man,,,,,,,,, iam 45 btw still healthy because there is no problems in my life because once u removed women's from ur life a man can be a happy man finally

[@YourAverageGuy786]

'they hide in camouflage' Alhamdullilah lol

[@FaiyadFit]

SubhanAllah akhi

[@layla1796]

I have just entered med scl, almost finished first yr. I dont know what to do😢. I feel hopeless but my parents are relying on me. I wish i never got in

[@comedyalbums7202]

I as a man is not getting married btw iam financially very successful iam 30 years now but i don't want to get married as for me marriage is a waste for man, I don't want kids,, I don't like s*x,,, I just want to live my life, as marrying a women in India especially feels like a burden to me, my parents are forcing me to get married but i rejected every time i said to my parents that's I support women education because I want every man not to get married to a women who is living with husband just for money not for love, all women's are selfish and Moneyhungry,,,, AND THAT'S THE REASONS I REJECT MARRIAGE IT'S USELESS FOR MAN NOW A DAY'S I HAVE SEEN A LOT OF MY FRIENDS ENJOYING LIFE WHILE SOME ARE BIND TO MARRIED LIFE,,, I AM FREE FROM A WITCH I DON'T WANT TO PAY FOR A WOMEN,, LET HER PAY 😊😊😊 I SUPPORT THEM DON'T GET MARRIED SISITER SO THAT A MAN CAN ENJOY HIS LIFE

[@asyadelmont]

As a Muslim woman with two young boys, id like to know if its a good idea to find them a wife when they are still young (17-20) and financially support them both until they finish their studies or are able to work?

[@user-gq7mq9ej8e]

assalamualaikum brother, can you make a arabic version of this for parents?

[@FaiyadFit]

Walaikum Assalam in the future in sha Allah

[@mhz2836]

Assalamualaikum , what would be the alternatives to getting a riba loan for university?

[@CTzons]

Scholarship I think

[@AlmightyIsOne]

Very important remainder for the parents

[@kfiyaaa]

Some things I can’t wrap my head around: I feel like a lot of kids just graduating high school aren’t ready to commit to marriage. I’m speaking based on my experiences and those around me. There may be select few people who are able to do that. I feel like marriage is a big deal, and to go right into it because you’re afraid of committing zina is a narrow approach. And growing up in the west or wherever, it’s basically instilled in you from birth to become successful. Esp being in a immigrant household, all I can think about is becoming successful so I can take care of my parents. In a perfect world I would like to not do anything and just chill in my house but I feel like without making a living in this world, it’s almost impossible to survive. There are also a lot of cases where the head of the household may not be able to fully support his family due to how expensive it is to live in the west for ex. I feel like a lot of things you’re saying would work in a perfect world or with a generation that hasn’t grown up in the west or grown up going to school every day till 18. It’s very hard also for a lot of women to not want to have a backup plan if things don’t workout in marriage. I mean we just hear about these things around us. It’s not really about not trusting your partner. Sometimes ppl just want something for themselves. I mean why can’t women be successful , independent and also provide for their family at the same time?

[@Kepler10b]

I am 18 and I definitely couldn't handle a husband rn, or children. I am basically glued to my phone all day so Im not mentally healthy enough to look after possible tiny humans who will depend on me.

[@MALI-sm7zm]

​@@Kepler10b tiny humans 😂😂

[@NSB_playz788]

I am afraid of marriage responsibilities so I rejected every proposals but now ended up regretting and repenting sinner😢😢😢

[@drakefire5474]

Married people statiscally make more money then the unmarried. Literally. Imagine that paired with 3 -5 children. Mashaalah.

[@comedyalbums7202]

😂😂😂😂 stop this man ur wife will be ur boss and u will be her slave 😂😂😂😂😂😂marriage is useless in modern day

[@caalph]

I told my father that I wanted to marry after high school, he said that i’d be too young if I wanted to marry even at 27 and I just turned 14, someone please help me I don’t want to suffer my 20s with academic enslavement 😭

[@La.Nintist]

You’re gonna suffer more from a lack of passive income and a man who will most likely demand things from you in order to give you money. If something happens to the family financially you’ll be able to recover from it. Having the ability to financially care for yourself in a world where men are infatuated with culture more than religion will save you in the long run. Allah values education more than marriage. The first word revealed to the prophet was “read”. Khadija was a successfully business woman too. So please don’t sacrifice your self respect for a man who won’t guarantee your success. This world is run on money like it or not.

[@caalph]

@@La.Nintist im a boy not a girl, so can u give me that advice not as if i am a girl, bc i ama boy as ai said

[@User_47536]

@@La.Nintist Allah doesnt values western kuffar ass education , Allah values Ilm or Islamic kowledge. We need to free ourselves from the chains of capitalism and return back to our deen

[@rimab5894]

What’s your plan of supporting your family? Children? How are you planning to support their education? No matter what direction you go on, money is something you can’t escape. I know plenty of people who got married early and started a job, both girls and boys. Both had same problems later in life , MONEY. Unless you received lot of inheritance and are well off, focus on how to support yourself and future family. Also think of this way, if you get married this person right now and live to be 100 years then you will be together for 80+ years. That’s lot of years to be with someone, you know anyone you can tolerate for that long ?

[@hellokitty10117]

u just turned 14 dont think abt all those stuff, just be a kid

[@bhodro]

you are from Bangladesh Bro. Im surprised now

[@AbdullahUthman]

11:30 can anyone give reference to the Hadith? That's the first time I heard this.

[@FaiyadFit]

Abu Dawud (2050) narrated that Ma’qil ibn Yasar said: A man came to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and said, “I have found a woman who is of good lineage and is beautiful, but she does not bear children. Should I marry her?” He said, “No.” Then he came again with the same question and he told him not to marry her. Then he came a third time with the same question and he said: “Marry those who are loving and fertile, for I will be proud of your great numbers before the other nations.” (Classed as sahih by al-Albani in Irwa al-Ghalil, 1784).

[@AbdullahUthman]

@@FaiyadFit SubhanAllah! Many Muslims believe that "overpopulation" is a problem in the Ummah and say that it needs to be controlled. May Allah guide us. JazakAllah khair for sharing.

[@RedaReda-vl9ff]

You who reading this,i wish you paradise

[@saad458]

Salam alaikum, Allahuma barik this is a great and very important video, especially since I think that mixed universities are probably the biggest fitnah zone, up there with high school, I think that the west should have more male only universities at the very least that aren't looked down upon because most of the "good universities" in the country believe that the male only ones are just decorative to the name Btw, faiyad, do you know of any halal banks that one could start a bank account with in canada or ones that you have tried? Jazakallahu khair for the response beforehand

[@FaiyadFit]

Walaikum Assalam Alhamdulillah habibi may Allah bless you. And no I do not know any banks.

[@saad458]

@@FaiyadFit Jazakallah khair for the response, I will try my best to find banks in canada that are sharia compliant, though there is 1 named Manzil which I will look into insha Allah. May Allah bless you too and reward you for your efforts

[@toryvalero8871]

@@saad458 I have heard about Manzil as well as Tjara. I went with Tjara after checking out both. Tjara is a newer revamp of a slower/inefficient system that Muslims had to go through to comply with being Halal. Tjara is a non-profit with really competitive rates etc. No one wants to pay extra like nearly 1.5x/50% more just to go Halal as it's not cost-effective and is just blatantly unfair for those seeking Halal. Really hopeful for Tjara and other similar future initiatives to make Halal more accessible and competitive.

[@saad458]

@@toryvalero8871 jazakallah khair for your insight, I will look into Tjara as well!

[@GHURABA_DUNYA]

Assalamualaikum brother. Ur channel is so good Barak Allah Allahumma Barik. My parents wanna make me a career woman,how and what should i do to make them understand? I m so confused rn. May Allah Subhanahuwa Ta'Ala guide me and make things easy for me Ameen

[@comedyalbums7202]

Just enjoy ur life and study hard sister marriage is useless in this time i am a man very financially successful but when a proposal came to my parents I rejected I was 30 because I don't want to get married,,, because if I got married I would have lost all my freedom and happiness,,, and iam not a slave of women😅 iam 45 now,,,, I enjoy my freedom health and family and friends,,,,, I seen a lot of my friends not get married because they also want to enjoy life not like those who waste it on a selfish money lover women

[@infpforever.]

@1:00 I agreee

[@JOYRIDEUS]

Not too mention those "uncles" times were WAAY different than now everything is hypersexualized. Music tv movies and lifestyle of the west. It wasn't as prevalent even 10 years ago as it is today, nevermind 30

[@Serenityinseclusion]

I do agree with the brother. But also about parents wanting their children to prioritise education, in this economy it’s getting harder to support yourself just as a single person… imagine supporting a family. Young Women also considering marriage in this society, unfortunately the majority are exposed to very unrealistic expectations of an Islamic based marriage… so many parents that I would like to believe their daughters are able to hold her own in case she faces unforeseen circumstances. Muslim immigrants parents understand the struggles more now than ever and how hard it will be for a woman to support herself if she needed to. However, I think the main underlying issue is a lack of education surrounding what a Muslim marriage should look like..it’s as if these days what people are exposed to online become heavily reliant sources for a specific narrative and go into marriage with too many expectations that mainly support western cultural practices. And parents are aware of this, social media ain’t easy to hide. Parents should be prioritising their children’s Islamic needs especially regarding a big of a life change as marriage, 17,18,19 unfortunately in this time the emotional maturity is heavily disproportionate to the sexual incline these age groups face and parents are responsible for making sure their children don’t fall into fitan. - This is just my personal Opinion.

[@FaiyadFit]

The main fundamental flaw is people’s lack of tawakkul in Allah. What do you think is the solution to this?

[@Serenityinseclusion]

@@FaiyadFit Back to basics! It’s easy to get caught up in the rat race. A lot of parents find themselves conforming to societies expectations of their own kids. But they need to go back to teaching their children the basics and stressing the importance of the core values of Islam. Similarly, young people who are seeking marriage should take it upon themselves to seriously educate themselves on it and truly seek to understand what it means to marry for Allah’s sake. Marriage is a blessed thing, a gift from Allah. I recommend for young people, as a starter, to watch Ali Hammuda’s series, Married ever after.

[@Theyskyisblue]

Im going to an all women’s college tuition free Insha-Allah , will I be okay? I won’t be free mixing since there are no men and I won’t have to take out loans as long as I’m financially eligible for aid. my only worry is med school. I’m no where near going to med school just yet but I’m worried that if I do go, I’m going to feel forced to free mix with other men 😖. There are a few med schools in my area that are tuition free (highly competitive tho) but my only worry is the coeducation 😔

[@comedyalbums7202]

Sister don't get married, marriage is useless if u are earning 😅 , iam a man I rejected a total of 7 proposal when I was 30 years old my parents forced me but I rejected saying that I don't want to marry a money hungry or a whore women 😂😂😂😂iam happy 45 , no depression, physically fit no worries and and financially very stable,, marriage is a gamble also for man nowadays😮so gambling is haram so i stayed away from false love so called marriage

[@a4482921]

Lack of righteous rijal is at the root of so many problems. Women and parents of women who don’t trust men will of course pursue economic independence.

[@ChiefAsian]

Yo bro, I loved this vid man. Could you perhaps do a video on exploring masculinity in Islam and how to do so. Like I'll see loads of Muslim men happily show "tough love" but don't even know how to defend themselves let alone show empathy to those they care about. In personal experience, I've seen Muslim agemates bang out MMA but don't know how to be empathetic and caring to their sisters or mums. I'm putting this video idea out here for the sake that it could benefit everyone.

[@FaiyadFit]

Brilliant akhi. Give me more ideas

[@ChiefAsian]

@@FaiyadFit Why Muslims Sister's should get in shape for fitness?

[@ChiefAsian]

Step by step guide for Reverts who just came to Islam and what to do?

[@iOmegaToxic]

I agree with most of your points, but you have to understand it isn't the fault of man the 1 provider isn't enough to take care of a family, I live in iraq my mother is the main source of our income alhamdullilah her payment is good, but she haven't been paid for 4 months straight, many poor people started stealing/selling body/killing just so they can feed they family, and you're saying they are lazy? We are powerless, all we can do is pray .

[@FaiyadFit]

I disagree akhi. Men aren't working as hard and muslims don't financially support each other in the community. Men have become weak and I agree exceptions exist, but I'm speaking generally. Men are responsible akhi.

[@abdoucamara9932]

This isn't true, my guy. There are unmarried men who are out here working their butts off 7 days per week, putting in overtime, and still aren't able to cover their basic necessities due to inflation. The government is taking our tax dollars and funding big pharma, the military-industrial complex, and migrants rather than improving the lives of US, UK, and Canadian citizens. @@FaiyadFit

[@ashey68]

​@@FaiyadFit u know that me and my husband two have jobs because in my country the rent is higher than seveb times the minmum wages so i have no choice to get a job just to pay rent

[@comedyalbums7202]

Good u should also pay 50/50 ,, he married u so that u and he lives a happy balanced life pay equal gift him something🎉❤❤it's good 👍​@@ashey68

[@Aysha_m_a]

13:26 😂

[@a.90129]

im 18F and don’t want to get married tho, i’ve had several proposals but my parents would’ve never agreed to them even if i DID want to

[@Kiaraofthepridelands]

Myy parents are forcing me to go to uni this September but i just want to get married instead, i'm going to be forced to take the riba loan and i don't know what do do.

[@GHURABA_DUNYA]

Assalamualaikum. Same situation May Allah Subhanahuwa Ta'Ala make things easy for us Ameen

[@Trs0o.]

Assalamualaikum I suggest that you should talk to a knowledgeable person in your area for advice. I also suggest that you don’t obey your parents if they tell you to do haram. May Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala make it easy upon you. Make dua, pray tahajjud, make istighfar and you can also pray salat istikhara

[@Trs0o.]

@@GHURABA_DUNYA Assalamualaikum I suggest that you should talk to a knowledgeable person in your area for advice. I also suggest that you don’t obey your parents if they tell you to do haram. May Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala make it easy upon you. Make dua, pray tahajjud, make istighfar and you can also pray salat istikhara

[@Kiaraofthepridelands]

@@Trs0o. there's this man I really want to marry but I don't think he likes me at all, please make dua for us.

[@Trs0o.]

@@Kiaraofthepridelands I’m a sister too so feel comfortable to talk to me! May Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala grant you a beautiful husband. Maybe you can send your wali to see if the guy is interested in you too.

[@Liyah2004]

I don’t think we should use marriage as a means for just staying away from temptation. Indeed, it is best to be in a halal relationship than haraam, but telling young teens that in order to satisfy yourself you must be in a life long commitment relationship, where they (if they live in the west) most likely do not fully comprehend what that entails, will just be a trap that will inevitably be hard to get out of. Plenty of people marry straight at 18 and then get divorced like 5 years later. Why is that? They need healthy ways to channel that desire, not immediately throwing them in a relationship for something, quite honestly, is less meaningful in the long run

[@imna2122]

Thats so true. It will become toxic if it's just about the physical part. We are not animals. We can learn how to control it with deen and therapy.

[@khizerzubair7172]

I believe he is trying to tell young teens to prioritize working towards marriage versus secular education. At the end of the day, we get married to please Allah SWT, and Allah has made marriage with many benefits and wisdoms. The brother in the video is trying to get us to better ourselves in our deen and our connection to Allah to prepare for marriage, which is something that should not be delayed.

[@FaiyadFit]

@@khizerzubair7172 Yes bro spot on.

[@DynamoLord]

Don't you guys watch the video and understand before you comment. Or you jst want to comment for comment sake. Where did he say marriage is only for staying away from temptation

[@samia6888]

Getting married and then getting divorced is better than getting yourself into a haram relationship and displeasing Allah 10000000% cause those people will get themselves into a haram relationship with each other anyway and break up eventually if they don’t get married.

[@tabuuharruu1425]

Other than Abdur Rahman ibn Awf, there were many other men like Abu Bakr, Umar ibn al-Khattab, Uthman from the companions (Sahabah) of Prophet Muhammad (saw) who would ask Lady Fatimah's (sa) hand in marriage for reasons ranging from her well-known virtues to her relation to Prophet Muhammad (saw) and a noble family. However, all suitors were refused for as Prophet Muhammad (saw) had said, Lady Fatimah's (sa) marriage had been decreed by Allah (SWT). And with the descent of the angel of revelation, Hazrat Jibril (Gabriel) Prophet Muhammad (saw) had been commanded to marry Lady Fatimah to Imam Ali ibn Abi Talib (as). Prophet Muhammad (saw) has said in this regards, an angel came to me from Allah (SWT) and said, "The Lord sends his greetings unto you and has said, I have wedded your daughter Fatimah in the heavens to Ali ibn Abi Talib; you too therefore wed Fatimah to Ali ibn Abi Talib!" It is mentioned in the narratives that Prophet Muhammad (saw) said: "If Ali didn't exist, there would be no mate for Fatimah."

[@FaiyadFit]

If you’re saying this to justify Shiism then I can’t support that. But the point is valid in the sense that Ali ra was indeed decreed for Fatima ra

[@tabuuharruu1425]

@@FaiyadFit no, i am just saying some people may not have a nasib here in this dunya

[@FaiyadFit]

@@tabuuharruu1425we won’t know unless we go out there and tie our camel

[@tabuuharruu1425]

@@FaiyadFit what do you mean, it literally says fatima had many suitors but she wouldnt get married to anyone but to ali, because allah's decree was so. She would have had no mate even if she wanted to

[@nejad_ihsan]

​@@tabuuharruu1425You're saying there's no freewill?

[@larosenoirek2197]

So now I am starting to wonder???? Because I am nurse and because I take care of the sick male and female patients and work with both male and females doctors ( mix environment) I need to change career????

[@o_-970]

I hope Allaah brings to justice those evil parents of today and rewards them accordingly. They have helped mess up the entire 2-4 past generations

[@RaiShamis]

Unfortunately this is true. I want to get married but my family won’t allow it cause “I’m young” and I’m forced to complete uni which I hate.

[@KaydiCoumba]

My dad made Financial stability for my siblings and I obligatory before marriage. 15 years into my marriage, I am grateful for that.

[@LightyPlayz]

His opinion is only half right, Parents don't let there kids get married early is because they fear there daughter will be lonely and she wont be able to help her self if a situation like this to happen. So Yes and No it depends on the parents which way thinking. Most parents only care about there daughter and not some paper that can be burnt.

[@piscesgirly]

My parents never had a plan to get me married. They gave me best education in order to that i can take the responsibility of the housefold expenses n not for my bright future. I'm an MBA n now 37 years old n still unmarried . When people used to ask them about my marriage during my early marriagable age when normally girls get married, my parents used to answer in no, we don't but afterwards they started telling that i don't want to get married. But it's lie. They told me every time that they have spent money on me on my education so it's pay back time for you, you must take all our financial responsibilities. But they use to get married their so called daughtes of relatives n friends n say they are doing sunnah of daughter's marriage.

[@hamzaahmed5804]

Im sorry to hear that sister. Parents nowadays are really confused how to go about such situations. They lean towards either of the extremes and that is very problematic. But I believe in sha Allah Allah will provide you a pious husband.

[@piscesgirly]

@@hamzaahmed5804 Aameen summa aameen Plz brother remember me in ur precious dua

[@bluesage7744]

may Allah make things easy for u

[@ReBuild_conscience_palestine]

The survey of ++ partners won't be any different in Bangladesh. It is sooooo terrifying. Now I literally can't decide should I stay in the hypocrite west or go back home, how do I save my kids from this fitnah! 😵‍💫

[@Kurumi2310]

I didn’t watch the video yet but I don’t like the sticker of “Selfish Muslim Parents” in my country most parents encourage their daughters to both get married and have a degree bcz you may never know what circumstances you might find yourself in in the future, unfortunate things happen and it won’t hurt to have a back up plan in cases the husband find himself unable to provide for the family. May Allah‎ﷻ protect our parents and grant them health and Jannah. Alhamdulillah for everything.

[@aminamuazu5078]

I'm still shocked. You're from Bangladesh 🇧🇩 😮

[@HimothyHumphry]

9k!!

[@FaiyadFit]

Allahumma barik

[@flyperson1]

I'm a woman and Bangladeshi Muslim living in America, it is disturbing how normalized free mixing is in this country. May Allah SWT protect us all and grant us spouses that will be the coolness of our eyes. Keep up the great work brother, you're spreading the best message

[@angkhoa1216]

Alright, well i have 2 option for you 1) Leave 2) shut up and assimilate.

[@rusticmeerkat3879]

do you think woman should be able to go to uni at all?

[@justaquariums4095]

Yes women should be allowed to go to uni as long as they have clear goals. Unfortunately stupid parents tend to raise stupid kids an dthats more the problem than anything else. I went to uni became a Dr, work with women delivering babies. Got married young and have 3 kids. My priority is my deen, husband, kids. But my job has helped me help others. I wouldn't bother sending my kids to uni unless their goal is to help others, better society and themselves and do it with aim to please Allah. I can't stand people who do stuff to please others or climb the ladder in society. We need to as Muslims get an education to help our next generation and to be able to improve our deen. Women who have no clue and no education are the ones who raise kids with zero guidance. If I hadn't gone to uni I wouldn't be the person I am today. It helped me gain learning skills and allowed me to then start learning Arabic, my kids also learn Arabic now and I doubt very much I would have been able to do this for my kids if I did not learn it myself as it can be intense but also going to uni was the step it took to open my world into education. Unfortunately there are women who I know who have zero clue or care about the education of their kids. Not only that -they have no clue what their kids learn at school or how to approach various issues with their kids. The men Unfortunately do not pass their knowledge om to kids. A womans education passes to next generation.

[@justaquariums4095]

If men can go to uni then women should be allowed to go aswell. It seems silly to say women are more likely to do wrong than men. Infact it is men who are more likely to cheat? Right? Or no? Also do men not want educates wife? They are happy to live with a woman who has no clue how ro raise kids? I'm surrounded by a number of uneducated women and believe me kids being allowed fizzy drinks and not bothering to brush teeth and not breastfeeding and dummies in mouth of 3 year olds. Not great. But its ok guys you can reduce your kids to hooligans. A mother raises her kids not a father. And what a womans knowledge base is will be passed onto her kids. There needs to be a balance in all things

[@diobrando6919]

Female unis only which is rare in the west.

[@justaquariums4095]

@@diobrando6919 you guys are going a bit over the top. I went to uni and as a woman didn't have any issues including from any Muslim men. If a woman is covered up fully and doesn't interact with men then it's no issues. Infact I think from this video it seems this man was having difficulty. There is such a thing as a woman wanting to learn to better herself. It's only trashy women that chase around after men. And trashy women walk out with faces painted like clowns.

[@minxxz1287]

@@diobrando6919so u want Society to collapse ?💀 how are u expecting women doctors to treat muslim women when u don’t even want women to go to universities

[@PureHanbali]

Bro, just started to see your video for the 1st time and didn't expect you to be from my country!

[@kushinaa1XD]

You can be married and pursue an education at the same time.