Finally talking about it

[@garrettunhinged]

Jesus you're brilliant. An hour of you speaking feels like 3 minutes. Love you Drew, your sincerity is both moving and inspiring. Keep holding on. Also, stoked for the new album and also that boom box with the built in vinyl player built in is melting my mind it's so cool.

[@Ambrrrrritscoldinhere]

Right!? I was just gonna say it didn't feel like it was an hour. It's reminiscent of The Catcher in the Rye.

[@Shyner_24]

AYO the Gare Bear here be spitting straight facts

[@aleshaodean6689]

You both are such beautiful people

[@JohnnyFaith]

Spooky boys reunited pls

[@victoriabuitron8188]

@@JohnnyFaith yessss!! they totally shoulf someday!!

[@CharaViolet]

When he said "tough love only works if you believe that person loves you" that was so real and I really felt that.

[@Barkerfam6]

Chills!

[@seanceknowles2911]

He says things I’ve been trying to express for soooo long. When he said that I paused. I think that’s validation happening.

[@lc4life369]

Havent gotten to that part of the video yet but that should be a quote.

[@myyoutube129]

He has a knack for saying really deep things in a way that makes it sound lighthearted and a joke

[@CharaViolet]

@@Stephania006 "Tough Love" is love or affectionate concern expressed in a stern or unsentimental manner (as through discipline) especially to promote responsible behavior. But if you don't actually believe that person loves you or cares for you, it won't register it as an act of kindness. It just feels like random cruelty.

[@nevaehkirby9378]

i got high and was gonna watch some youtube. i didn’t realize this was gonna be my last time getting high. i needed to hear this.

[@nevaehkirby9378]

it’s been exactly 3 hrs and i’m smoking again but this at least gave my the motivation to clean my house instead of binge eating 🙂

[@TooMuchPam]

​@@nevaehkirby9378relatable asf comment.

[@jamesauruss]

a year later and im in the same position as you lol. i need to get up and pack. im moving tomorrow 😭

[@sagew1312]

​@@jamesaurussHow did the move go?

[@Angel-Otk]

@@nevaehkirby9378nah you disappoint me fr🤣💀

[@ant7417]

this video was the catalyst for my sobriety. I’m at four months today thank you so much for posting this.

[@normalizenatalie]

congrats :))

[@kaia6187]

This is incredible. You are incredible!

[@curiouslittlefrog]

This comment made me tear up. I’m proud of you

[@Kimberly34584]

Congrats!

[@HoneyWithoutVinegar]

Kudos man! I also started my addiction recovery after seeing this and it's so fucking hard. Stay strong dude. If my math is correct you should be at 6 months sober at this point so keep at it! Half a year!

[@hopeforlilli]

"tough love only works if you believe that person actually loves and cares for you" WOOF thats a kick in the nuts

[@amber3189]

Right? That part got me too

[@toristokes8682]

Your transparency is brave even if you find it cringe or embarrassing, its not. It's honest. Thank you.

[@mytoecold]

I wanna make a joke so bad but I think I’m just gonna accept your niceness..

[@mytoecold]

I didn’t have a joke in mind by the way I just mean I’m chandler brained..

[@toristokes8682]

@@mytoecold That's ok Drew. We know. I know you worry a lot about what you post and how others will perceive you but as someone who has watched all of your content for years, your realness is what draws people to watch you. You aren't trying to sell something or be some influencer. You influence others with your authenticity, with your humanness and all the quirks that so many have and feel ashamed of. Be proud of yourself.

[@Kristine_202]

It can be cringe and embarrassing and honest all at the same time. I'm sober and if I couldn't look back on my struggles and laugh at the cringe, I'd go crazy.

[@faithlmao5082]

I agree ❤

[@ITSMERlVER]

Please don’t ever delete this video, Drew. It's extremely helpful. I've never seen anyone talk about this the way you have. Thank you for this.

[@ook428]

The day I was born my brother who was 2 at ta the time and being minded by a babysitter. He got away went to the farm sad was killed by a tractor. I don't know how my parents coped. My dad died a few years after that. All I am going to say is I have gone through every conversation and I don't think either of us would have been happy. My whish I wasn't convinced. His wish the babysitter was better or not needing an income so he didn't need to work that day.

[@JustSomeGirl87]

​@@ook428I had a hard time making sense of all of that?... But if I am getting it right, I'm sorry that all of that happened.

[@hannahb9195]

The doctor's reaction is BS: If someone is coming to the ER multiple times for drug-related reasons that is a cry for help and that person needs support and care

[@RebaMcImTired]

Right? A doctor shouldn’t be screaming at anybody like that💀That’s so unprofessional and weird.

[@zubetp]

i thought the exact same thing. that doctor was being willfully oblivious of that.

[@M00NdaYn]

Yeah that doctor needs to go.

[@unknownunknown-yi6wp]

​ @RebaMcImTired Unfortunately, not all, but alot of doctors lack basic empathy, and just life experience to be able to understand situations people can go through such as Drews. From personal experience. Not all doctors are equipped for that, not saying that it is an excuse but it is super shitty.

[@elijimenez7710]

LA drs are like that

[@mytoecold]

hi so im reading the comments right now and so much of it means a lot to me, im not replying to every single one but I just wanted to say that I probably saw it and made a face at it or felt it in my stomach. especially people who have been watching me for so long and relate to this, it's such a special bond and hope I go on a real tour one day and see people. this was scary for me but im so glad I did it overall. my 2 new songs are on all streaming platforms now. i hope u listen to them and my album is out on April 17th. and as always I talked 30 more minutes on my patreon patreon.com/drewmonson

[@joel.d]

Presaved your album and filed the paperwork to change my name to Tyler

[@mytoecold]

here's the Spotify link open.spotify.com/album/5SewChIZlTHVzp7dZuuBUi?si=omQTEV2uQUK52U_F0Otvfg did u listen to it??? btw if you are reading this before watching my video I swear there's more to this and this isn't one of those videos where its called like "my secret" and the secret is they wrote a damn book

[@massiveconehead]

i hope you’re having a great day! take a deep breath. you did it. im so proud of you.

[@savage_optimist]

I love you so much Drew that I had to reset my facebook password just to sign into my Spotify just to pre-save that darn album. But it's selfish also because those songs are delightful and I can't wait to put them on my playlists. Also, I'm a fellow addict who is in recovery most of the time. I love you and I support you.

[@saraheikkuri9072]

listening to the songs rn drew, love the vibe!!!

[@angelinelars9051]

“Sick of having control” is such a great way to describe that feeling. When you’re a perfectionist or people pleaser you get to that burnout point.

[@11ellie7]

this.

[@amybrowning]

right??!!

[@yuukibean707]

Oh god you're making me realize this xkkdkd. So true.

[@ridofchris]

yeah.

[@jstylo09]

Yesss

[@dakotabruton7195]

“When you’re so attached to something, you’re not going to blame anything on it because then you lose your coping mechanism” 15:28 this explanation is better than anything I’ve ever heard in regards to this

[@skippyuber6072]

so so true

[@hwoods-kg1jf]

I could really relate when he said that because I've struggled with addiction/alcoholism for almost my whole life sadly. Still struggling...with weed and the pills. No more alcohol though. My liver is SHOT from being a raging alcoholic for a long time sadly. I can't drink at all anymore or I won't stop and I'll die and sooner than later....Got a little over 2 years sober from booze!

[@arolinger4]

as someone who is currently in the addiction stage you described it so so perfectly it made me cry. you make so many people feel so much less alone and it’s incredible. we love you so much

[@evolvedmadam]

You deserve to get better! @alyssaolinger3721 reach out soon. One foot in front of the other, you can do it, you aren't alone, and you are worthy

[@julie13789]

i can’t imagine how scary it is to upload this, just know we are all here to listen and be with you. so much respect and love, drew. wishing the best for you always

[@mytoecold]

I wish the best for you too

[@amybenham1796]

Only you could make this story not feel like an uncomfortable trauma dump. You're brilliant. I've missed you.

[@igirl]

real

[@mytoecold]

honestly that is kind of my goal thanks

[@jimlock999]

let's be real, it's the Spongebob jokes

[@fshoaps]

The term "trauma dump" is so dumb. It's called being a person.

[@sarajanzer1514]

​@@fshoaps trauma dumping is very much real but not necessarily in this context

[@mbryant4525]

I’m 406 days sober today. I’d listen to hours and hours of you talking about your recovery!

[@LeslieItza94]

I’m so proud of you.

[@emilyleander3597]

​@@joyfulcookiegaming it's normal to recover from addiciton?

[@suzyriding9311]

Congrats!!! Way to go! I'll be two years sober on May 31st. Such an awesome feeling. I agree. I could listen to Drew forever.

[@brittanygreen202]

Omg congrats on your recovery! You’re amazing 💓

[@catizhie]

@@joyfulcookiegamingSweet child

[@jesskory9157]

I grew up with Drew.I always felt we were soooo similar with our sense of humor. I’m almost 30 now and have substance abuse disorder. When I tell you this video made my jaw drop. I felt so seen and I feel like us addicts always are on the same wavelength. I can’t really explain it well but thank you drew. It was brave of you to say this. I am proud of you. There are more people like you out here than you think. The overthinkers. ❤

[@goingeverywherefast]

This.

[@psychosoma5049]

@@goingeverywherefastthat

[@rebeccamellito2857]

This and that

[@aprilgeewhiz3814]

I’m a 60 year old mother of 4 adult children (your age) and I’ve watched this video 5 times already. Why? Because I’ve been sober for 16 years and this video reminds me why. It is so important and helpful and appreciated. Thank you Drew for sharing your story. Recovery works when you remember where you came from and that you’ll die if you go back. Anywho…..thanks!

[@tedstudt8550]

You're a strong fighter. Keep fighting the good fight ❤️

[@xlightknightx]

Yes this was a good reminder as to why I am sober; even though it’s only been 9 months.

[@w.m.8126]

Congrats on 9 months !! @@xlightknightx

[@SanDesigns]

Oh Mama you're the kind of success story the world needs more of. You're amazing.

[@aprilgeewhiz3814]

@@xlightknightx there’s no ONLY in sobriety. It’s one day at a time. Congratulations on 9 months!

[@amalaylay]

I swear Drew is the only person who can share some extremely painful and difficult life experiences and have me cackling with laughter the whole way through

[@sambalgoreng]

right!! his storytelling is just immaculate

[@iridescentdecency9472]

Amazing how you can speak on such a serious subject while being extremely funny simultaneously. I really missed you and your videos!

[@leticiasatie8189]

I saved this video to my "watch later" 9 months ago when it first came out, and I had no idea what it was about back then but I knew I was intrigued seeing someone from my "childhood" back on KZbin. I never got the chance to watch it back then, and yet I feel like seeing it now was the best time of my life to have ever. After 2 years of struggling with my addiction, I am finally sober. I really agreed with your statement on how addicts can invalidate each other with their own struggles. But the crazy thing is, in my 2 years of severe addiction, there was a solid 3 times that I almost died, and that STILL wasn't enough to encourage me to get clean. So the boundaries are different for everyone, and I totally agree that if it is interfering with your life in any shape or form, that is enough to want to get sober. You don't have to hit rock bottom to finally get help because truthfully had it not been made entirely inaccessible to me, I don't know what my boundary would have been. I probably would've ended up dead. Watching this video, I have GENUINELY never related more to someone else's content. And that's the thing, I have never felt more understood than when interacting with or hearing the story of another addict. No one will ever truly understand until they themselves have been there. It's so easy to question why someone could "throw their life away just to get high" as an outsider. I even related to your internal monologue of the vision of your sober self giving an interview as that is something I did exactly amidst the peak of my addictions. I guess it's a coping mechanism that helps us look to the future. I'm glad to say that I'm finally sober now in the year of 2024, but the withdrawal was quite literally one of the hardest things I have ever experienced both mentally and physically. Thank you so much for making this video and for being so candid.

[@Barkerfam6]

“When you’re so attached to something, you’re not going to blame anything on it or you’ll lose your coping mechanism.” POWERFUL ❤

[@stinkypicklemonster]

“dad if you see this call me and apologize, i’m serious” is incredibly honest and simultaneously hilarious as well as too relatable. drew i hope you know how brave i think you are for sharing this much of your life with us, no matter how cringe you might feel like it is or how uncomfortable it might’ve been for you. thank you thank you thank you.

[@Mozzarella-and-Tomato]

this

[@dahlia6457]

read this right when he said it lol

[@Bri-tf6eu]

!

[@anjailbakeer]

This is the most honest addiction story i've ever heard. Thank u drew.

[@evansaye1521]

Thanks dude. I’m 46 days sober from cocaine and alcohol, I did 33 days of inpatient treatment and it changed my life. I have a long way to go though. Unfortunately a friend I made in treatment relapsed after and did not make it. My best friend sent me your recent video on loss and both of these have helped me more than you know.

[@RebaMcImTired]

I hope you’re doing well!

[@Deadlineontop]

Just wanna say hope your doing well man

[@evansaye1521]

@@Deadlineontop going strong 1 year and 6 months later. Thank you!

[@barbedgirl]

​@@evansaye1521That is amazing!!! 🤩 Great work!! 🙌

[@coldhands6648]

this dude's the only youtuber who can create videos that literally make me giggle in the middle of almost weeping. it's so interesting cause i only ever experience those moments through comparatively elaborate films or music that's perfectly contrived to induce that sorta reaction in the viewer. it's remarkable and beautiful to me how something so ordinary, simple, as a barely edited, random, stranger throws me into such a vulnerable moment

[@jenni_rtv8518]

That’s deep and I’m with you on that 100% he is really good KZbinr and I feel that I can relate to him.

[@taylorbores7604]

Well said, so true

[@jazzwell]

Yeah, this resonates a lot.

[@yvettemadelaine]

Totally 👍

[@devnienavaratne5740]

@@taylorbores7604 t

[@elizabethhuerta7549]

As an alcoholic, currently in treatment for the 6th time…my daughter sent this to me…she said “I just wanted you to feel seen by a KZbinr we’ve always loved.” Thank you for this ❤

[@CloverLovesTT]

i admire your bravery in trying to improve your situation. you can do this!!!! i believe in you!!!

[@psychodelicc963]

I lost my mother to alcoholism when I was 19. hadn't seen or heard from her for at least 3 years before. her body deteriorated and by her death she was 5'6 and 75 pounds. i eventually fell into addictions of my own that I'm just starting to climb out of at 26. thank you for choosing treatment, no matter how many times it takes. I hope your daughter never lives the reality I and so many others have. people like you give people like me hope for the future. ❤

[@daMEGatron]

This comment made me tear up. I wish you and your family the best. You’ve got this!

[@deviantpanda1206]

You're stronger than you realize! You can become healthier!

[@kaitlinfrost264]

Proud of you for getting help, no matter how many times it takes. My dad had a brain aneurysm due to alcohol, and now lives in rehab and will for the rest of his life. He's blind in his left eye, and has basically no short term memory. I wish he would've gotten help, and not been enabled by people around him. Sounds like you have people who support you and that's amazing. Good luck on your recovery journey ❤️

[@sammihessling5849]

I'm 5 months sober. And to hear a creator that I have loved for close to 10 years is going through the same struggles, means so much. We all love you Drew, thank you for being so open and honest.

[@smallspooks]

Congratulations!

[@thatkid1163]

This really does make me so happy for him & a little more seen bc you never hear about anyone online dealing with these kinds of struggles be so open about it 🥺

[@ZeranZeran]

I'm proud of you stranger :') That's a huge deal. Be proud, and keep going strong!

[@clarion3204]

Hi Drew. Guess what? NINE MOTHERFUCKING MONTHS SOBER!!!!!!!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!!!!!!! ❤ This video was my wake up call. I was actually smoking a joint on the curb outside my apartment when I clicked on it, not knowing what it would contain. And surprise, surprise, it was just your face and voice appearing in my life and letting me know that I wasn’t alone in my struggles, and that it was okay that I needed to get help. So I finally did. After years and years of knowing I had a problem, of making a breaking promises to myself, of trying to quit and falling back into the name nightmarescape of destructive patterns, I did it. I reached out and got help. And now I’m 9 months sober. And guess what? I was just elected Secretary of my home group meeting!!!! That’s right, not only am I sober now, I actually run and facilitate an entire MA meeting!! I have a script and everything! All the world’s a stage, baby, and I made the cast list!! I’m actually super honored and excited about it. I’ve subbed in as secretary a few times already and it’s wild to be of service in the same room that 9 months ago I walked into, broken down and withdrawing and so fucking tired of living through the same old bullshit. My life is so different now. Thank you, in your own way, for being a part of my recovery community. Parasocially, sure, but you’re still a real human who effected my real human life. I’m different now, my life is so different now, and I’m so grateful for it. Thanks, Drew. You’re a real mensch.

[@ashtraypup]

i’m so proud of you :)

[@Jadesmorot]

Great going! Congratulations 🎉

[@Hellakiddie]

I’ve been sober since 2019 And contemplating relapse. I needed this. I’m so grateful you posted.

[@kylieshaye6562]

❤

[@miyukuchan22]

You got this!

[@elpocakoca120]

You got this Lindsay!!

[@annagrozdanov]

ur a tough cookie lindsay u got this

[@crystalinabacteria3430]

Keep going it's worth it❤️❤️❤️

[@whiskeygrandpa1426]

I’m sure this will just get lost in the comments, but this video helped me recognize my problem with alcohol. I quit cold turkey two days ago, and spent the last two nights in the ER being treated for withdrawal symptoms. My mother was an alcoholic and passed away from complications with her addiction, and I never want to be there. Thank you for helping me recognize I needed to make a change.

[@rhiannong1344]

i don’t want this to get lost in the comments, im very proud of you!

[@maria-gh5rv]

im so proud of you like seriously

[@beulahboi]

i'm sure you probably know this now but just in case. If you ever have to quit again do not do it cold turkey. It's too dangerous when it's alcohol. As I'm sure you learned in the ER. Hope you never have to do it again but never be too afraid or ashamed to keep trying if you have to go though it again.

[@donutsandgravy3150]

I know you can do it. You can do it, you can do it, you can do it. I am so proud of you.

[@loco7357]

You CAN do this, as the ones before me have said. I am clean three years- they have been some of the best years of my life! Sober is always better ❤

[@samsmith757]

Being against substances because your family are addicts and then falling into the same thing relates so hard to me. Love you Drew, as someone in active addiction this is putting me in a step I the right direction.

[@clubaurora5904]

Im in the same boat. Active addiction. Always was against drugs because of my family. Now im an addict just like them. Addiction sucks

[@clubaurora5904]

I hope ur doing okay. You got this.

[@jadehuff3935]

Same here. My older brother ruined his life and I always looked down on him and judged him, now I’m in the same boat. It’s so hard when people have no idea about addiction and want to judge you for it. Addicts know EXACTLY what judgements they’re going to face and we’ve heard it all before, but that doesn’t change anything. We ignore the judgement or we let it drag us further into our addiction. I’m glad I’m able to experience what being an addict is like so I am able to understand my brother more and addicts in general. Everything about it is so sad but so liberating at the same time. We will come out Alive. I love tou

[@laceyengle9757]

I'm five years free of my addiction, it's difficult but it's possible, I wish you the best.

[@missymisdemeanor2183]

You've got this, friend! No matter how hard it gets, you've got this. I am praying for you.

[@xXjules13Xx]

ADHD-haver here! After my diagnosis when I took adderall for the first time, it was SO QUIET in my brain and body. It felt like I’d had an army of bees flying around inside my body and mind for years and that the adderall made them take a nap for 8 hours or so. I was so stunned by the silence and lack hyperactive thoughts that, for the first time in my life, I sat there with my eyes closed and was actually able to think about nothing.

[@soho6435]

Another ADHD-haver here! Stimulants never worked for me, unfortunately. They make me feel like a zombie and don't even help with productivity. So everyone is different, just a PSA.

[@xXjules13Xx]

@@soho6435 o yea, i’m aware! i’m very lucky that they work so well for me cuz i’ve known people in the past who have the same reaction you do. sendin good vibes your way, hope you’ve found stuff to help ya out!!

[@emilyetheridge8081]

Totally relate to that!!! After I took adderall for the first time I took the best nap of my life, without having to deal with the incessant inner monologue/random thoughts

[@soho6435]

@@xXjules13Xx Thanks!

[@soho6435]

@@emilyetheridge8081 Yeah the only thing they did to me was cure my lifelong insomnia lol. Ever since I was a child I could NEVER fall asleep and turns out its cause of ADHD

[@greymilk]

This is one of the best conversations on addiction I've ever seen. You've always been an incredible story teller and quick witted, but the severity of the topic isn't compromised. And you're so right about "not being enough of an addict" talk making people apprehensive to asking for help. You're the coolest, drew

[@charlottesteinman2913]

Ive never really seen someone talk about addiction candidly like this and it kind of humanized it in a way? It was really insightful. Proud of you for working so hard for yourself and for uploading this!

[@CrystalCat24]

Right?! It's usually the same textbook explanations when anyone is addressing addiction publicly and they don't really hit me authentically... The way Drew explains it is so realistic it's refreshing! Plus he still peppers in SpongeBob jokes, music, dancing, and jokes that keep it entertaining w/o coming off forced or fake or any of that!!💕 Ok, that doesn't make that much sense, but I think u guys get it.😅

[@withsophia2061]

I just realized what scares me most about addiction- not the danger to myself, but the judgement of others. It is terrifying to think people would look at me like I'm worthless because I'm an addict.

[@littlebrandylovexoxo]

Yup. I struggle even telling people im recovering. 8 yrs sober i should be proud to say it, you'd think.

[@aryannawooten3283]

@@littlebrandylovexoxo i’ve been surrounded by addicts my whole life. if anything, recovering addicts are the best people among us. congratulations on being sober, and i’m praying for you even if you don’t believe in god. truly happy you got out of a world where either you die or get out, there’s no inbetween. congratulations again.

[@littlebrandylovexoxo]

@@aryannawooten3283 thank you so much!

[@doublefeature]

we JUST starting to realize it's a health issue and not a moral issue. i personally have no problem with telling people i was a heroin addict because i hope that going thru that and now being 6 years sober, may inspire people. and for the people that judge and say ignorant/hurtful things; thank you just showed me your true colors! had a coworker tell me once he thinks all addicts should be taken to an island and left there. it helped me know he wasn't someone i wanted to waste my time conversing with.

[@doublefeature]

@@littlebrandylovexoxo you should be proud, you should feel amazing about that feat, not shamed. remember some people truly just don't understand and don't know what it's like to live as an addict or love an addict. but the people that do understand, will find strength in your story. congrats!

[@Ryan_Culbreth]

I had no intentions of watching the full hour in one sitting, but I couldn't stop. It literally felt like we were on Facetime. Thank you so much for sharing, it's really wonderful to have this as more representation and awareness. I'm so glad you felt safe enough to share and that you're doing better!

[@HaleyBug221]

The bravery in this video is big. It was big of you to be able to talk about such a hard topic and personal struggle.

[@meganl9573]

drew i’ve watched you since 2015, and this sounds so cheesy but genuinely your videos are art. the way you speak, the profoundness of your words, the comedic relief, like truly you are so gifted. i used to play your break up video over and over again and cry just to feel something. miss you, wish you well

[@Subllama]

He’s so amazing and a gift to the world. He doesnt even realize how he really makes our day and his candidness is so refreshing.

[@annaelisavettavonnedozza9607]

4 years clean from Heroin/Fentanyl, & 2 years from EVERYTHING else. This is a brave & wonderful video to see. Your honesty is refreshing. Love you Drew ❤

[@chapsticker]

massive congrats to you, keep it up

[@Nicole__Natalia]

Happy for you! I wish I could 😔

[@D8rk_Kitt3n]

I'm so proud of you! I am 4 months clean from heroin but I still struggle with cocaine here an there. I do gabbapentin every day and without it in sick but in slowly weaning myself from it

[@heyjude5513]

Congrats Anna!! Its hard to do , one of the hardest things I've ever done for sure. Thats amazing. Lets make our 4yrs into 5 and be on the journey together :)

[@glitterymartini]

year and a half here!

[@andwatifisedno]

Man, I totally remember the first panic attack I had smoking weed. I legit was convinced I was dying. I remember thinking, "I am going to be the first person in the world to die from smoking weed" and being 100% convinced it was the end.

[@lexworl5669]

Happened to me too 😅 I literally went to the ER in an ambulance lol so embarrassing

[@212MAY]

*sigh* brings back memories to when i was stuck on the wall of my hallway for a good minute because i got too high hahahahaha

[@dawert2667]

I work on an ambulance and you’re literally not alone, I’ve had to do a looooot of patient education about panic attacks. Fun fact you can get one from smoking weed whether its your first time or your 1,000th time 😀

[@jenn005]

I remember being in the car with my “friends” at the time and she took the long way home but in my high paranoid mind they were trying to kidnap me and had laced the weed. I ended up having a panic attack, thinking I was dying and convincing them to take me to the hospital. Good times 🥲

[@Numb217]

I stopped smoking weed in 1980. Last year I got my medical marijuana card for pain. The weed out there now is so much stronger than the best weed available in the day. I hate to admit it but I can’t handle it. I wish I could, but no matter the strain I still get paranoid or anti-social. I’m a broken Hippie.

[@charlotteclark7675]

“Even if it’s sort of a horror show, somewhere else is good enough”. This really resonated. So grateful you shared, addiction is so powerful. I’m 4.5 years sober and grateful every day for sobriety.

[@pamela5378]

resonated with me too. i remember trying edibles for the first time and crying from relief because i had found somewhere else i could go

[@eeeee4888]

I read your comment at the exact moment he said this quote i don't like that

[@Paranoid_potat0]

My brother died from a laced heroin overdose 8 years ago today, 4/3. So echoing the people that have said this came out today for a reason. So happy that you are on this journey and doing well.

[@mellymel6447]

Blessings to you as you heal ❤

[@mytoecold]

:( what a sad coincidence but I choose as well to believe it’s a good one! I hope you like SpongeBob wow

[@Paranoid_potat0]

@@mellymel6447 thank you ❤️

[@Paranoid_potat0]

@@mytoecold I’ve honestly never seen the show but I still got and appreciated the jokes 😂

[@dinosuarzr0ck827]

I work in addiction medicine and the stigma is astounding, people don’t see how much work it is to get sober and maintain recovery. Drew and everyone struggling with an addiction, please be kind to yourself and recognize how much work you’re putting in ❤

[@noah1502]

" when youre so attached to something, you're not gonna blame anything on it." too real, such a good reminder for almost anything in life. thank you for your vulnerability and honesty.

[@0ethereal0]

I struggle with drug addiction too. It’s at a point right now where I feel like I really do want to stop. I take seeing this video as a sign that I definitely should.

[@TheCaptainJade]

It’s time my love. Your best life is ahead, along with some of the hardest parts as you learn to lean on your strength to cope with being in recovery. You can do this!!

[@emmajane9403]

I had a 25 years coke addiction - the last few years it was nearly everyday. But I’ve been just over 3 months clean and it’s the best thing I’ve ever done. My health has improved and I have tons of money now. Please do it now so you’re not like me and ruin your life because it’s 25 years I can never get back. Good luck 🤞 you can do it 💪🏼

[@zoegrimes2070]

I am proud of you and rooting for you!

[@emmajane9403]

@@zoegrimes2070 I don’t know if you mean that to me or the poster. Either way thank you 🙏🏽❤️❤️

[@zoegrimes2070]

@@emmajane9403 both ❤️

[@mogwai_]

"I'm bitter about something that's my fault" you are really able to take responsibility but also communicate your feelings, that's good

[@tory4006]

Every time you upload it feels like getting a video message from a middleschool penpal I havent heard from in 15 months but I'm glad to see you, even if you aren't doing well or arent happy its nice to know you're around. its ok to not be doing well, but we're all rooting for you.

[@ru406]

My thoughts exactly ❤

[@Shellobster]

I'm on day 0 of my recovery. Tried 3 times already and I am going to refer back to this video if I feel that strong urge to make the wrong choice again. It's been a really long and exhausting cycle of trying different ways to numb the pain of things I've mostly brought on myself. I've been in-patient several times due to weed induced psychosis and the trauma of those episodes just gets buried and never resolved. It's an easy cycle to fall into. Getting out will be the most challenging thing I've ever encountered so far. But you have given me so much hope. ❤

[@kaleighmarshall8580]

I can’t express how thankful I am that you are talking about this candidly. I think I needed a sign, and this video was it. I hope that makes sense. If you were hoping this video would help at least one person, it did ❤

[@sukatidi]

take care ❤️ i believe in ya 💐👑

[@malkam.7543]

You are worth it. Take care of yourself. You can do this.

[@heycaseydilla]

You absolutely got this. 🧡🧡

[@bbylex]

you’re not alone, i hope we both get to the changes we need to❤

[@LucindaR]

🫂

[@andreamayo2spicy]

Oh wow this is a blast from the past! I went to middle school with you Drew, we had band class together! You were hands down the funniest kid I knew. I remember you started doing youtube around that time and we'd all talk at school about how hilarious your videos were. It sucks to hear that you went through such a tough time but congrats on your sobriety! I'll always be rooting for you!

[@carrieadcock1250]

This warmed my heart so much

[@rain2646]

This is so sweet

[@reeddior]

Hope he sees this

[@mytoecold]

what did you play??? thats crazy!! im trying to remember you! my memory is kind of bad (because of the things I mentioned in this video)..but seriously thank you so much!! much love

[@mytoecold]

I was soo bad at trumpet right

[@queeralfdotexe]

I’m so fucking proud of you. I know this is a parasocial relationship, and my words do not and should not matter to you, but if you do see this, Drew, (or if you’re a viewer reading this who is thinking about getting clean or has gotten clean for any amount of time,) I really am proud of you. I’ve had a lot of people close to me, and in my life generally, who have struggled with addiction in many forms. I’ve seen people lose their lives and take their lives at the hand of substance addiction. I’ve seen the aftermath of families destroyed by this. It’s a brave act of compassion for yourself and those close to you for you to work toward your own physical and mental health and stability. It’s hard work and healing isn’t linear, so please, please don’t forget to be at least a little kind to yourself through all of this. It may not be worth much coming from me, but I do really believe in you. And I know there are other people out there who believe in you too. Please don’t give up.

[@alyssaroberts2675]

Agoraphobia is one of the worst things I’ve ever experienced

[@stxrdusted]

I'm currently trying to get out of it, it's so hard

[@alyssaroberts2675]

@@stxrdusted I’m sorry you’re dealing with it :( try to be hopeful, it does get better with time. Mine took a few years to go away but I finally snapped out of it through exposure therapy (by myself) and I can finally look at the world around me and appreciate its beauty like I did when I was a kid instead of being scared of it.. acceptance is probably the key word in all of it. Sending you my love🫶🏻

[@benamisai-kham5892]

I've been fighting mine for a while now, I've been getting by, but only by not paying mind to the fact I'm surrounded by people. It's horrible and a struggle because staying home all the time becomes stifling.

[@alyssaroberts2675]

@@benamisai-kham5892 I know the feeling of being trapped in your house :( keep exposing yourself to the uncomfortable situations and eventually** it will get better ❤️ stay hopeful I know it’s hard

[@JS-0-]

I feel like I kind of dealt with it a couple years ago for about 1-2yrs. My anxiety got worse than what it was after graduating highschool. Even just going out the front door made me want to start crying. Getting in the car made me super anxious and I just wanted to get back in my room where it was safe. Eventually I started taking my dogs on walks around my neighborhood. Trying to get further from my house every time. Then I started looking into jobs , got one & now I’m free to do whatever I want whoever

[@nikkilight2703]

Drew, as a person who visited her dad in rehab when she was a little girl, that little girl who wanted to meet you thought you were the strongest person ever. I remember my dad was in rehab with this amazing artist and he drew me and my brother an insanely realistic picture of a teddy bear. My brother and I had that picture hanging on the wall for years and through multiple moves.

[@amber7ison]

Your candid honesty is amazing. It reminds me of Katya Zamolodchikova talking about her addiction & psychotic break. It's not a world I've been in, but hearing people talk openly & honestly about how they got to where they are/were is a great way for people to gain some insight on addiction & hopefully some empathy, too.

[@leuvenfra]

It reminded me of her too

[@CrystalCat24]

OMG Katya and Drew are two of my fave people!!😅😅 How random!💕💕

[@spxllbxxnd]

@@CrystalCat24 same!! this comment made me realize how similar they are lol

[@alexandram6081]

Watching this actively high is making me feel like I need a wake up call. I started it sober, finished it high, but changed my viewpoint entirely. Thank you Drew.

[@heatherrhoades8884]

Ditto. We got this!

[@bgeorgiam]

you can do this, you are strong

[@libertyjane13]

tried not to hit my pen the entire time i watched this

[@AlexisBlack-pw7jw]

Same girl

[@nyah5213]

same

[@clarion3204]

Over 90 days sober. Thank you, Drew. ❤ this is the longest I’ve been sober in over a decade. I kind of can’t believe it. I’m so glad I have people supporting me in my sobriety, and at the same time I’m sad that I feel like I lost some people in my life by making this choice of myself. I’m so proud of myself and my choices, and yet the other weekend I was at a bbq and saw some of my old friends who kind of ended up avoiding me. No one said anything to me about my sobriety, but I did notice that no one offered me a joint, which is very unusual, so clearly word has gotten around without me having to say much of anything. It really hurt my feelings and confused me. It was weird. I wish my friends could be proud of me, but instead they’re acting distant and putting up a wall with me. It made me feel sad in a little kid way, like how it feels when you realize everyone has been invited to a birthday party except for you. I’m glad I didn’t let it effect my choices and just stuck to sipping my spindrifts all night, but I still can’t really wrap my head around their reaction. The way they’re acting makes me feel like I did something wrong, or like I’m some sort of social pariah, even though I’m the same me with the same sense of humor. I wish they could be proud of me, or even just saying something about it to my face. I still hang out with one of my old stoner friends; they still smoke around me and I don’t partake and everything is cool and fun still. Idk why my other friends are treating me so weird. I’m glad I’m making new friends through my queer sober group. I’m really excited to get my 90 day chip and a hug at the meeting tomorrow. I also joined a sober DnD group, I’m meeting up with some folks to march in the Pride parade on Sunday, and I had a three hour very adhd phone call last night with one of my new friends where we just talked about music and black holes and it was awesome. I still can’t quite process the hurt I feel in my heart surrounding my old friends, though. I want to speak up to them and say something, but I don’t know what. I wonder if I want to be friends with people who treat me this way. I can’t help but wonder if I did something to deserve this. I wonder if they’ve all decided something about me behind my back. It all feels so backwards and irrational, but I can’t ignore the fact that they’re pretending like nothing has changed while treating me totally differently. I know it’s probably for the best. I know I want to keep being sober. And I know friends who can’t support that aren’t the sort of friends I want to keep. But in quiet moments, I still feel sad and lonely and confused. Those sort of feelings were what would cause me to use in the first place. But I’m not allowing myself to numb out and run away anymore. I’m breathing through the hurt. Moment by moment….

[@Puffamallow]

I hope you’re doing okay! You got this

[@clarion3204]

@@Puffamallow Seven months and 23 days sober :)

[@enderrode]

@@clarion3204so very proud of you!! you’re doing amazing :)

[@syndeybinch]

@@clarion3204LETS GOOOOOO

[@jake_from_statefarm7209]

I hope you're still going strong, my friend ❤

[@amazingabby25]

No judgement for addiction, only love. I’m happy you are here. I was substance abuse counselor for so many years and so many of my amazing, wonderful and creative clients aren’t here anymore. It’s so amazing that you are brave out there to share your addiction struggles, thank you. As they they say, even though it’s cliche as fuck, one day at a night.

[@natashaemilyxoxo]

Thank you for what you do 🩷

[@Pixielocks]

This this this. No judgement only love.

[@bluewinterspring4041]

❤❤

[@tiar8857]

i've been watching you since i was 14 and i'm 21 now, so in a strange little parasocial way this felt like a catch up with an old friend. the part about not feeling serious enough of an addict really opened my eyes, like i genuinely feel as though i just woke up from a long long nightmare. thank you so much uploading this video drew, i can't imagine the strength it took. wishing you the absolute best, we're all so proud of you

[@indin1324]

What they said “

[@allykat3466]

So this video was so motivational. I’m an alcoholic. I got out of rehab about 2 months ago and I was so determined to never drink again. The withdrawals I go through nearly everyday almost killed me. And yet here I am, having to have left work early today because I was drinking all week and my body said “no more, we’re gonna throw up every 5 mins for the next 24 hours”. It’s heartbreaking but you’re proof that I can stop, and I need to and want to. I’m rambling now but I needed to see this video. Thank you drew, I’m proud of you

[@tilllie]

u can do this!!!!

[@takeadeepbreathin]

You got this! I really wish you the absolute best.

[@redss111]

Go to a meeting. You can't do this on your own.

[@nickybee800]

Ally you can do this… please don’t give up. I get it 😢

[@Ryevlan]

You got this!!! 💪

[@clarion3204]

Hi Drew, guess what? I’m one year and five months sober. Thank you ❤️ Life right now is full and complex. And I’m really glad I’m experiencing it sober. Sobriety has meant accessing the full range of my emotions again- not just volleying between euphoria, depression, anxiety, sadness and numbness. I’ve felt contentment, joy, regret, heartbreak, anticipation, longing, revelation, peace, curiosity, excitement, anger, frustration, overwhelm, comfort, and care. I’m a human in a fleshy, soft body with a strange and hungry mind, and sometimes that makes me feel so vulnerable, and other times that makes me feel so alive and free. It’s odd. Being a human is never just one thing, and I’m learning to embrace and welcome these multitudes instead of trying to control or shut them out. I keep spreading myself too thin, and then having to find my way back to center. To be okay with disappointing people, to be okay with having needs that change and shift every day. Sometimes I absolutely need the care and attention of other people, and I’m learning how to ask for that. Sometimes I need to be alone and show myself and inner parts some attention, and I’m learning how to give myself that too. The addict brain’s gonna addict, and I am still so prone to take things to their extremes. But I’m also learning to observe and check in with myself. To seek balance, or sometimes just ride out the pendulum swing. I’m proud of myself, even through the fuck ups. And I’m learning to love myself, organically and authentically. (Have you read All About Love by bell hooks? Highly recommend). I’ve also rediscovered my love of music. I’ve been attending live shows, taking myself out dancing, doing karaoke with friends, and I’ve even dipped my toe into song writing. I met a friend through recovery and we started hanging out and making music together, and eventually we decided to start a band. We practice together every Tuesday, and we’ve even started recording some of our songs. I’m just really happy I have someone to make music with, that I feel comfortable singing around, that wants to hear my ideas and collaborate and have fun together. And that when we’re done doing that, we watch old Jersey Shore episodes and eat chips together on her couch. I’m really grateful for our friendship and the opportunity to express myself through song. It’s something I’ve deeply wanted for so long, but was afraid to say out loud or believe was possible for myself. I almost ruined my voice a couple times during my years and years of smoking, and I always knew it would be an unforgivable tragedy if that happened (if I let that happen to myself), but I still couldn’t make myself stop. I’d hack up brown tar and throw up yellow bile and know it was bad and wonder why I was doing this to myself, and then I’d go ahead and keep smoking. Addiction is fucking wild, man. I saw you’re taking a break, and I hope you’re doing well. We all need breaks sometimes, and I hope you’re getting what you need from yours, and that you let it take as long as it needs to take. I’ve been on a break from posting on social media for over six years now and sometimes I think I’ll go back, but I’m not ready yet, and that’s okay. We all have our process, and things take time. Healing takes time. By the way, you music was actually the first thing of yours I got into. I didn’t engage with your comedy videos until later (and I adore them). But I just wanted to say that musically, you have something really special. I admire your work and it has really had a huge impact on me. You were actually my second most played artist in 2020 (high key too embarrassed to tell you who was #1), and I spent a lot of long, lonely drives as an essential worker going from client to client singing along with your albums. The pandemic was fucking bizarre and surreal and excruciating, but I have some solidly positive, distinct memories of driving around in a transit van full of indoor plants (long story) while singing along with you to I’m Alone and Some Other Light. Thank you for making art that has affected my life in such profound ways. From soundtracking my pandemic to guiding me to the start of my sobriety journey, you’ve been a weird unseen force in my life in a really affirmative way, and I’m grateful for that. I’ve noticed over and over that humans can struggle to fully comprehend the impact we have on each other (even in a non-internet-celebrity sort of way), and it’s so easy to forget how much we need each other. One night after a meeting, some recovery friends and I went out to dinner and instead of playing a card game like we usually do, we did something called “sunshine circle” where we just took turns going around the table and saying nice things about one another. And it was astonishing. We all ended up crying at one point or another. Because we all loved each other so much, and had such deep admiration and care and affection for each other, but realized that night how much we didn’t say those things out loud to each other. How we just felt them and kept them inside. To really take a moment to sit someone down and tell them all the wonderful things you’ve observed about them, and reflect them back to them… it changes things. Because I don’t think any of us really know how much we impact the people around us. And so many of us go through life keeping our thoughts to ourselves, because it’s safer and more socially acceptable, I guess, than telling your friends you think they’re courageous and kind and beautiful and how they make you feel safe and loved and worthy. So, not to be all weird or anything, but thank you. For being a courageous, unique, and vulnerable force of nature. Thank you for putting yourself out there. Thank you for continuing to effect and shape my life in positive ways, even though you don’t even know I exist. Thank you for being a beacon of effulgent light for freaky little weirdos to gather around and feel seen. Thanks for making me laugh, and sometimes (when I really needed it most) for making me feel less alone. Thank you, Drew. Sending you luck and good vibes and all that jazz.

[@ToeteMichBitte]

I was in the middle of taking a hit of [insert bad drug here] when you said "stop being so mean to yourself". My eyes welled up and I started crying. I've been doing this shit almost 15 years. I wouldn't wish an addiction on my worst enemy. Drew you are so strong for making this video. I'm in awe of your honesty. I can't even be honest with myself, yet you just opened yourself up to the entire freakin' internet. That takes massive guts. Thank you for being so candid and for reminding me that I deserve better than this. We all do.

[@BigButtPaperWings]

at some point, we'll be ready too.. schöne grüsse

[@tracioday3778]

You can do it! The leap is hard but when you allow yourself the opportunity to prove to yourself that you can be the change that you cry about when you're getting high and mentally beating the shit out of yourself!! I'm a year and

[@Ohmyadeline]

Traci did you die before you could finish that comment

[@aldranzam3456]

Different but similar. I just finished purging (I've had an ED for a decade) and hearing someone talk about their struggled in such a genuine way, reading the comments... It's both heartbreaking and comforting in a way I can't yet explain.

[@LonelyArtistFanClub]

The video didn’t get but this did 😢

[@squiffle_na]

When you talked about having agoraphobia during the pandemic I almost cried because I haven’t heard anyone talk ab having the same struggles, I stopped going out of my house before I turned 18 and I am 21 now, hoping to get the help I need soon. I’ve been watching your content for years, You’re amazing drew and I’m proud of you :)

[@kayleenkoffkey9028]

I have agoraphobia as well. It means a lot when I see someone who’s like me.

[@Lololeelee]

Good luck to you ❤. My husband has it, so I get how hard it is.

[@Burntplastics]

I struggled with agoraphobia since I was 15 and had anxiety induced seizures until I was 18 when I slowly improved and adjusted . Covid really brought the problem back , it’s hard to get back out there . I hope you get the help you need ❤ advice my psychiatrist gave was to sit by the window everyday for some time and stand inside but with the front door open , and eventually sit outside a little bit everyday , as long as you can even for a minute . Hope this is some bit helpful 💕

[@ZeranZeran]

You are not alone ♥ This is embarrassing, but I'm 30 and I still struggle with a lot of the agoraphobia I did in my 20's.. but one major difference; when I DO find myself out in public.. I honestly just don't really care anymore. I used to feel like everyone was staring at me. Now, I make it a point to lift my head and look around.. the reality? No one even cares or notices you. Go out, be comfortable, feel safe, and have fun, even in a Target aisle. Keep going out more. If you can, go out with friends, or someone you trust a lot. It helps to make you start going out on your own.

[@DooBeeDooBeeDoBah]

From one raccoon to another, I hope things get better for you ♡ getting out is hard

[@LouLou.97]

I can't stand people who make mental health, addiction & trauma a competition. What you've gone through is completely valid and I'm so proud of you ❤

[@CharlesM2]

I’m serious, this really touched me. I’ve been extremely anti-social and depressed since covid hit, and during the past few years i’ve had a lot of emotional trouble that I attempted to fix with an excessive amount of weed and alcohol. Just recently i’ve been trying to get my life back in order and try to feel normal again, but it’s been really hard, so I guess it’s just nice to have even a single person that I can look at and think to myself, “If they can be strong in the face of this, so can I”.

[@scarletgreenfield7825]

you make me feel less alone! thank you drew!

[@mytoecold]

thank you so much shadow sisters

[@gabriellarowden9442]

I’m an addict and alcoholic with three months sober too❤ Thank you for this video ! I struggled so much for so long . Heroin and alcohol have taken half of my life to get away from. Now I finally have a community of a support and my mom (who has always supported me) is backing me 100% without ever enabling me. Do you have anyone else out there in recovery or still struggling, because kind and gentle to yourself, you are worth it, and I am proud of you.❤❤❤

[@biandito]

proud of ya

[@skyetrapp5511]

Dude, so proud of you!! Please keep going! I just got my 4 years of sobriety a few days ago and couldn't believe I'd ever even gotten this far. It does get better, absolutely ❤

[@rosex5418]

Proud of you!! Keep going!❤

[@leitourgiavibes9383]

Really impressed with your music. Please keep writing if it's something you love, it shows.

[@ladymacca88]

SAME, I just realized it existed a couple weeks ago, and I can’t stop playing the album. 100% the vibe and sound I jive most with, it’s so good!

[@Kimberly34584]

It’s it amazing! “Learn From This” was my most listened to song on Spotify this year.

[@bambi.boopboop]

As an alcoholic currently struggling through a relapse, thank you so fucking much for speaking about this. You’ve been my favourite KZbinr / person for so long for this exact reason. Sending you all the love in the world drew you are not alone ❤

[@bugmeep]

So proud of you for doing the best you can right now. You’ll get through this ♥️

[@brokebroken5839]

My dad is an alcoholic and my mom was bad on pills that played a part of her passing I tried so hard not to end up like my mother that I ended up like my dad I drank last year away and this year I realized that I can’t go down that path so I’m 4 months clean from alcohol so I’m very proud of you and I know how it is

[@griffithswife1704]

🙏💜💜

[@teryakisoda]

i’m proud of you as well !!

[@stephaniesegovia9712]

❤you got this☺️

[@gelenasomez9504]

💜💜💜💜

[@PickleAllergy]

Congrats o you..how are things going

[@hannahpettigrew3421]

I’m only 2 days sober and this video really is exactly what I needed. I love you drew and am beyond proud of you❤❤

[@clarasilva9919]

sending u strength! i believe in u (:

[@thevampqueenyt8782]

Proud of you! Small progress is still progress.

[@airwrecka3081]

I’m two days sober as well, we are in this together, I hope you don’t feel alone

[@liahriley773]

I know it sounds generic but you’ve got this, you are bigger then what you are battling ♥️

[@TaraSmallss]

You got this! I'm in recovery as well and you can do this!

[@jailucsantoro998]

hey drew i've been tryin to be sober for awhile now and whenever I feel freakish and terrible for being an addict I watch this video. much love to u I wish u luck on ur sobriety

[@hopesandreamzzzzz]

I’m so deep into this parasocial relationship that I genuinely thought drew knew how much I needed this and decided to come back for me.

[@jessicaireland9052]

no same.

[@mightymeatymech]

​@@jessicaireland9052 same. 🤎

[@adinagutierrez1480]

It is such a parasocial relationship. I’ll like fall asleep to his videos

[@hannobonanoart]

Honestly same

[@nailinthefashion]

Same beach

[@TaiTai_met_JacksFilms_2014]

As a current stoner that has been smoking for 7 years, I would like to thank you so much for telling your story Drew. It really makes me think about my own addiction and mental health issues I've been facing in a more reflective way. This video can really help some people and thank you again for coming back here, because I really missed seeing you! ❤

[@emilycassens25]

I’m so in love with the way your brain works and how you articulate yourself. I cried during this video because I see you and I feel like you see me. I’m an alcoholic and also dedicated to my own self sabotage. I’m so proud of you. This video helps so many more people than you could know. I’ve been listening to this video on repeat

[@SP-zw3om]

Hi bestie we’re the same Im rooting for you

[@lilangelneci]

I understand ur pain, it will get better, don’t give up on yourself ❤

[@SanDesigns]

I can tell from your comment that you are intelligent, compassionate, articulate and so kind. I bet there are people in your life who are proud of you and in love with your brain. I just wanted you to know that someone thinks you're ace. And I really feel the comments you made about Drew are very true for Emily as well.

[@clarion3204]

Hi Drew. Today I hit EIGHT MONTHS SOBER!!! Thank you, again, for this video ❤ My life is so different these days. Last night I got back from a Potluck and Game Night I organized and hosted at my local queer recovery center, and I was so happy and full of energy and good food. It was amazing to be in a room full of sober people laughing, playing and having a wonderful time. When I hit my rock bottom earlier this year, it was marked by a feeling of such deep isolation and loneliness. I felt like my life was just an endlessly repeating pattern of going to work, coming home, getting high alone, passing out, waking up in the morning, getting high again, and going back to work. Things felt so sad and grey and I didn’t know how to change that because I was so resistant to giving up getting high. I knew it was probably the source of so many of my problems and isolation, but it also felt like the one relief I had from those problems. I didn’t see how getting sober could really be a way to make my life better, but watching this video of yours made me come face to face with my problems and consider that maybe, just maybe, it was time I finally give it a shot. I had so much fun last night at the potluck. There was so much laughter and so many people came up to me to tell me what a great time they had and thanked me for organizing the event. I know I never wouldve had the follow through to put something like that together if I was still getting high all the time. It was especially heart warming to meet people there that were new to recovery, like I had been just a few short months ago, and watch them prove to themselves it’s possible to have a really fun Saturday night without getting high. I’m learning how to build the sort of communities I want to participate in. I’m not isolating myself anymore, I’m reaching out and bringing people together. The other month I started an ADHD Book Club, and i’ve been meeting up with friends at coffee shops for writing dates. In fact, I’m now running late to a writing date right now. I’m still so anxious about writing and caught up in my perfectionist tendencies, but finding accountability buddies who relate to that struggle makes a word of difference. Okay, I’m gonna run, but I just wanted to pop in here on my 8 month soberversary with an update and another thank you thank you THANK YOU. I hope you’re doing well, Drew. :)

[@funeralgrl]

i’m struggling with the same thing. this is my sign to get sober. thank you drew. so proud of how far you’ve come. can’t wait to go on the journey along with you

[@jupiterthejester]

Recognizing the problem is the first step! So proud of you, despite our distance :) you can do this!!!!

[@dud9083]

​@@ashleyc6527 How someone decides to begin their journey doesnt matter. What matters is that they've decided to do it. Give words of encouragement instead of tearing down their reason.

[@annaschewenius]

just wanted to drop in and say good luck on your journey! you can do it! we all believe in you!

[@sydneyroy4455]

You can do it!

[@funeralgrl]

thank you for all the sweet comments!!!!! also does anyone know what got deleted 😭😭

[@MsDailyHearts113]

Drew. DREEEEWWWW. This was so brave. And funny. And raw. And real. Thank you for letting us in and thank you for getting the help you needed. You deserve a wonderful life.

[@tessachevalier8381]

i don’t think i’ve ever heard someone more accurately describe pill addiction. i’ve just been sitting here not moving for the full video because honestly i’m in shock. i’m so glad you were brave enough to share this because it has made me feel so much less alone

[@gothfmboy62]

i literally was shocked the words were taken out of my mouth

[@Pappyeggs]

I see you and I can relate. I hope your journey is gentle and full of love.

[@shermdar_]

DREW! I felt this story in my bones. I went into detox at the beginning of the year for alcohol. I had been drinking 12-14 drinks a day (+/- a few) and I'll be hitting my 8 months soon! I see this video was about 4 months ago, so congrats on your 10 months!! I'm turning 28 next week, so it's really nice to hear a recovery story from someone my age. You're not alone, we're in this together

[@emilyarrington320]

Congrats!!

[@boysgenius]

I’m 511 days clean today! Seeing this video and hearing your story, someone I looked up to so much as a kid and that brought me endless joy, talk about something that feels so private and shameful for me is incredibly meaningful. We love you Drew. Thank you.

[@sleepychels0]

Hey. You can use whatever words for yourself that you are comfortable with. I am over 5 years in recovery, lots of ppl don’t like to use the word “clean” because it insinuates that drugs are dirty and morally wrong. When people use them to cope with horrible circumstances. Congrats and hugs to you in your recovery

[@boysgenius]

@@sleepychels0 I understand some people don’t prefer that terminology & I don’t push it on anyone else, but it works for me. I most definitely do not view those currently struggling with addiction (or anyone’s past addiction for that matter) as dirty. I’m not completely sober so I don’t say sober. I feel like that takes away from those that are sober to claim I am when I am not, it feels dishonest to speak about myself that way. I’ve also gotten shit from people in the beginning when using the word sober; this is just my personal experience and I’m not speaking for anyone else. I don’t do the drugs that will kill me anymore, and I’m proud of that. Thank you for your sentiment. I could’ve clarified my intial comment better but wasn’t trying to write a novel out, y’know? Congratulations to you on your journey so far :)

[@sleepychels0]

@@boysgenius I can respect and appreciate that. I’ve abstained from alcohol, cocaine, meth, etc the entire 5 years but I still use cannabis sometimes so I don’t use sober either. I use in recovery, but yeah, language regarding addiction can get rly complicated! I can also really respect that you don’t use the word sober!

[@boysgenius]

@@sleepychels0 I have a similar experience to yours it sounds; various substances in the past, cannabis + an occasional drink are about all I can handle. Thank you for sharing that. It seems like there’s a very thin line of what is deemed “okay” substances to use in the recovery community. Everyone is different, our sustainable usage is going to look different. I’m proud of you for how far you’ve come. I apologize if my intial wording felt derogatory, I’ll try to be clearer with my intent in the future when speaking about this. I do honestly thank you for reminding me of how that can come across!

[@funkopopruler-3206]

congratulations!! you are so strong and inspiring!

[@daultonlitteral3143]

Drew. I am 5 years clean and sober. Once I was at a point where I was homeless at 19 bcus my drug addiction had ruined my life. And i swear that when I was homeless i would go to a place with wifi and download KZbin videos to watch through the night and alot of them where yours . So I thank you for helping me get through those nights back then when I was living in my car with nobody to help me. ❤

[@bugmeep]

So proud of you!! ♥️

[@daultonlitteral3143]

@@bugmeep thank you so much 💖

[@pinky1068]

omg im so sorry u had to go through that

[@Helen09166]

i can't remember the last time an hour long youtube video actually held my attention. you are so genuine, i love you drew we all missed you!

[@EtherealSubss]

Your story about how you decided to start doing weed, etc etc was sooo soooo similar to my experience. You are so strong to even say anything, especially posting to your audience.

[@nicolefranger9684]

This is one of the most genuine, vulnerable, deeply moving videos I have ever seen. I’ve watched your videos since you were with Shane and Trish all those years back and I’m so sorry you suffered for so long. Thank you for sharing this deeply personal experience. I sincerely wish you all the best ❤

[@jordynsteinbrink800]

This is hands down the BEST video I have ever seen of someone talking about addiction. It’s so clear and true and easy to understand you included some comical stuff but you were also so honest. Im just sooo impressed. Thank you for this, it’s really helped me and so many others.

[@tarawatsn]

Excellent comment

[@hairyfrankfurt]

This was such a genuine and sincere picture of substance use disorder and what recovery looks like for so many people. 6 months is incredible, I'm proud of you.

[@bjetszperxmaniax30]

From a fellow addict to another .. I pray that you continue to stay strong and to know you’re worth it and that please always love yourself and don’t beat yourself up for any mistakes made along the long hard road of recovery. Keep looking forward and not backwards toward the past and those past mistakes , none of that defines YOU! love you Drew. I appreciated this video. #WEDORECOVER #FUCKFENTANYL #FUCKMETH

[@scarletrois]

Had a sever seizure due to alcoholism and even that didn’t stop me. Thank you for spreading the light on how bad it actually is and all of the addictions; it’s a disease. You’re a true warrior Drew 🎉 We love you; Thanks for coming back.

[@avandeville]

I flatlined for 12 minutes after a heroin overdose and a year later, I was drinking again to blackout. It wasn't heroin, but still a heavy relapse. I found myself in shelters and on the street a year after relapsing to alcohol. This weekend, I move into a studio apartment. I'm drinking again but not blacking out regularly. Havent touched heroin in years.

[@averyjbyrd]

I lost my brother to a heroin overdose three and a half years ago. My sister and my dad are both recovering alcoholics. My family has lost so much to addiction. But it has also shown me how resilient and amazing people really are. My dad has been sober for 14 years! Recovery really is possible. And I am so proud of you for your vulnerability and honesty. It will help so many people, myself included. You are seriously my #1 favorite content creator and I am always happy when you come back 💕 also very stoked for the new album!!!!

[@aliciaa4859]

so sorry to hear about the loss of your brother🫶but oh so proud of your dads journey!! proud of him and sending your whole family and you lots of love

[@averyjbyrd]

@@aliciaa4859 thank you so much 💕

[@AlexandrasGirlyTalk]

I have so much love for you I literally kissed the screen. That is all ❤❤❤

[@karissanoelle]

We feel the same when you post ❤❤❤

[@theresalayton9286]

This comment is ADORABLE 😍❤️ and I'm with ya!!!

[@milkyoni]

Aww❤

[@supergorillaz]

i love both yalls vids.

[@SelfishMachine1993]

Love you Alexandra!! 😍😍😍

[@yobee100]

I have never seen your channel before. I was curious about your topic and hesitant about the length of the video, but the time flew by. You’re an excellent story teller, very engaging. I’m glad you’re overcoming your addictions and shared your story. Continue to hold on!!!

[@avapuchreiter1522]

I’m sober off Herion 2 years this week!!!💜 I started when I was 14 and put myself in treatment when I was 16. I have used your content as a way to cope and get through withdrawals and tough spots, you have done so much for so many and I know you know that. We love you, I LOVE YOU DREW❤I’m almost 18 and I’ve been a fan since I was 13.

[@jar0ffl1es]

I’m so proud of you 🖤🖤🖤

[@1212lilith]

I use to work at an ER and it's so true most of the nurses and doctors have zero sympathy for anyone coming in for using any type of drug/addicts, the homeless, and sadly most of the SI children (they always say they do it for attention). It broke my heart, they are very desensitized, never look deeper into any situation and just judge and project. I was only registration at the time but am in school now

[@kristinb3093]

Ya I've experienced this & its horrible. I've been clean from pills & cocaine for many years. I put so much shit up my nose for a good 10 years & because of that I have a bad deviated septum. I've been to 2 ENT's in my town for help. The second they realized my septum issue was from drugs, the whole mood changed. They sent me back to my family doctor because they said I needed "more help" which is just so wrong. I've been clean for so many years & had proof with urine tests for all of those years. I still haven't had help with the issue. I kind of gave up. I want it fixed because I've worked so damn hard to change my life for the better. Its a reminder of the mistakes I made in the past. I wish I could get help with it so I can really move on.

[@hannahb9195]

I've had this; I am a disabled 'vulnerable' adult with learning disabilities. Was committed for depression after an attempt. It had on my notes that my mother had abused me...the first things someone told me after waiting five hours was "it is selfish to do this, what would your mother say?"

[@schwydlen13]

The world needs you! Good luck with school❤

[@zubetp]

yeah, i think they see self-inflicted situations as being a waste of their time. i remember being in the ER after an attempt by overdose. a nurse snapped at me for being drowsy and not understanding a question. i've never forgotten that moment. i had started to feel numb and tired, and the way she spoke to me right then shocked me back exactly an hour and a half, right before i had decided to swallow all the pills. i remember apologizing to her, which just pissed her off more because she needed an answer to a question lol.

[@Lucifersfursona]

Amazing bc children are literally incapable of lying abt that

[@feralmeat]

It feels good to know one of my favorite people is facing a similar problem and I still think he’s a good person so…so am I. Thank you Drew.

[@KatBurnsKASHKA]

that's a really good way to look at it. I'm rooting for you both.

[@rachaelmendoza3647]

As someone who deals with alcholism on my dads side and mental illness on my mom's side...I see you, I understand you, and I love you. Thank you for making this video ❤

[@elijimenez7710]

Be yourself You are not your parents difficulties Create your own reality

[@Coconutvr-r1z]

As a former addict (and a child of an addict) who has been sober going on almost three years, I loved this video, Drew. I laughed and related to so much of it. No judgement here. I wish you the best in your recovery. One day at a time. Stay strong. We need your humor and wisdom and talent in this world.

[@doublefeature]

could have written this exact comment, couldn't agree more. love to all the addicts and recovering people in the comments! you are amazing, drew is amazing and everyone should be so unbelievable proud of their accomplishment. keep on keepin' on!!

[@Fignewton225]

Im two years sober and I feel the same way. Go us, all of us collectively! This video was great, thanks drew.

[@SanDesigns]

You're awesome and an inspiration to others. Stay amazing.

[@WavingOcean]

I mean.. nobody could've worded it better than you Drew. You've spoken for so many of us, thank you

[@thenicoleodeon]

Drew is so musically inclined I’m so happy he’s coming out with an album because he’s definitely gifted when it comes to creating music

[@macybailey336]

recovering fentanyl addict here,, i’m so so proud of you for getting help!! recovery last forever babes, but i know you got this

[@macybailey336]

almost 6months is BEAUTIFUL!!! i’m so happy happy happy for you😭😭

[@katequinn5077]

My partner took their life in July. We used to love watching Drew together. I hadn't realized I haven't seen him post since. This notification was a wild ride. Love you Drew, thanks for being vulnerable and hilarious

[@DRMC02]

I am so so sorry to hear about your loss. Please know that you’re not alone and I really hope that seeing this video brought back some good memories. I really wish you the best❤

[@gendale007]

Sorry for your loss🙏🏼

[@erm492]

I’m sorry for your loss

[@emilyt8301]

I'm so sorry for your loss. ❤

[@fancypuss]

This happened to a close friend of mine with her partner. I don't think she will ever stop hurting. She has recently married (quite a few years later) and loves her spouse, but will always love and miss her partner who has gone. What I'm trying to say is, you are not alone - though it may feel like it right now. Sending love to you ❤❤❤