Find Your Enneagram Type (while making a candle)

[@croak8575]

Welcome back ❤

[@AbbeyHowe]

♥️

[@crownandcountryside]

I love the format of this video. It's so different for you, but it works!

[@Avionne_Parris]

Healthy me would've totally reacted like Abbey did in this situation. Logic is my growth type 1 North star... otherwise my main type 4 shows up, overreacting and lashing out at everyone. I tend to act more like my healthy self around my family members. When Grandma died, my mother kept calm highlighting the positives to dying (9), I called each family member to organise the wake (1), my sister freaked out and needed comfort from her friends (6), and my brother withdrew, focusing on how it happened, aka the facts (5). But normally, I would react like a typical 4. Great video, Abs! More anecdotes about you, Kenzie and Sally please :-)

[@AbbeyHowe]

thanks for the thoughtful comment, as always, Avi. ♥️ Appreciate your example too!

[@LizzMo]

As a 6w7, I usually react with fear, but then I swing into counterphobic mode. My aim is to troubleshoot the problem, keep everyone safe, and refuse to let it beat us. It's a very protective mode! For me, 6 is like being 9 types all in one, cycling through different coping mechanisms and moods in a rapid-fire way throughout the day. I read the other day that we are the most emotionally reactive type; even moreso than 4s. That's how it feels to me, too. Note: Not all of those moods or coping mechanisms are seen to others on the outside. I think we hide alot.

[@termitesc.aardwolf3644]

I'm an enneagram 5 and my initial coping mechanism is actually reactive but then again, I'm on the autism spectrum so its natural for me to have meltdowns when stressed.

[@cmpicha2934]

Yay, I'm glad to see this topic come up so it can help other people! I came across the harmonic triad elsewhere and agree with how useful it is - I can attest to it narrowing down your type if people are struggling. In my case, I have such a strong 9 wing that at one point I had a phase where I debated whether I'm truly a 1w9 or if I'm actually a 9w1. I eventually decided the core fears/desires of the 1 were my primary motivators over the 9 even though I can relate to the 9 quite a bit. But once I learned about the harmonic triads, that was actually a lot easier because I absolutely do not belong in the positive outlook group, which solidly ruled out the 9w1. I definitely would've reacted like you in that example, but depending on the situation I think I can be a blend of the logic (my type 1) and the reactive (my 4 stress path). Actually I could see myself doing that in your example too. I could explain the situation I was thinking of when I think I did both, but I'll stop here so I don't get too long winded. I also like the candle, btw! And happy Easter! 😊

[@Robin_Hood_X_Beast_Boy_Forever]

I'm optimistic style.

[@reksonline]

This video came out at the right time for me. As someone who has mistyped myself multiple times, I’ve recently came to the conclusion I’m a 9w8. I thought I was a counter phobic 6, a 5, a 4, and recently a 3. (Too many, I know) but as many 9s will say, we feel like multiple types. Anyway, as somebody that had a house fire a few years ago, I was able to picture myself in a dire situation and how I reacted, and YES, I’m the optimist that puts a happy spin on disasters, seemingly confirming that YES, I am a 9. Lol.

[@StephanieJeanne]

Great cheat code! 😄Thanks, Abbey. Nice candle, too! 😊

[@AbbeyHowe]

Thanks Stephanie!!

[@jackwareham7075]

I'm torn between 1 and 6, but this gives me a lot more to think about. Thanks Abbey 💙

[@AbbeyHowe]

you're welcome, Jack!

[@KendrixTermina]

i agree that the harmonic triads are actually super visible in mundane everyday life situations. once you see it you cant unsee it. I really saw it play out in my family that time we had a Corona scare. Mom(7): Hey, at least we'll be immune, now right? We should be fine since we're vaxxed.... Sister (6): What do you MEAN Take it SERIOUSLY! This is SERIOUS! Me (5): guys, guys, let's get tests first to see which of us even have it & then we can think about how to quarantine Also, love your balcony

[@AbbeyHowe]

this is a GREAT example of the harmonic triad IRL. thank you for sharing !

[@SC-mw1ue]

Loved this!

[@AbbeyHowe]

woohoo!

[@Sleepykatzi]

abbey you are like my favorite KZbinr just so yk ;D

[@Mariblue1]

Hey I think you skipped explaining the 6! I had to listen to it several times to make sure. Can you elaborate what the 6 would do in this scenario? I am torn between a 5w6 and 6w5 so would love to hear more. 😊 Thank you.

[@Gandellion]

Logical I’m so a 5, but I’m coming to the workshop anyway! Heheheh

[@AbbeyHowe]

yay!! i'm so excited!!

[@Heather.C.ButterflySage]

Really fun illustration of the triads and types.

[@AbbeyHowe]

glad you enjoyed!

[@haleysalter90]

Okay…. So I had a stressful situation a few days ago where I began to flip out and overwhelmed, so I had to ask people for help. I cry with every negative emotion, get very overstimulated and sometimes shut down. I’m reactive clearly, but I believe my reaction is more akin to a 4 or 6. I think I’m a 4 because rather than try to blow off steam/cope/distract myself, I have a bad habit of wallowing in my emotions and spiraling. Teehee. I do think it’s interesting to think about situations where I’ve leaned into my 4w3 or 4w5 and consider what I felt before those responses or how the differences in the situations may draw specific, altered responses.

[@mollieirvine1026]

love the candle! My mum's signed up to your live training (she thinks she's a 9 but she's not sure). Also, picture having a 4, a 6, and an 8 in your immediate family. 😅

[@hasamahikaru]

confused between 6w7 or 7w6 (since I'm a sanguine, outgoing person) but after watching this I guess I'm most probably a 6. The "burning off steam" is spot-on for me lmaooo

[@margaretjudice8944]

Great video! Thank you for sharing!

[@RebeccaJensenRunBosco]

Speaking of optimism... I know someone who is typically optimistic but just doesn't make sense as any of the optimistic types (2, 7, 9). What numbers do you think are most likely to give a "false positive" as an optimistic type, if that makes sense? My best guess is that she's a self-preservation 1, and being optimistic is part of being perfect. (She is also very anxious, though not in a 6 way I think, and uses the phrase "I should" like a LOT, if that helps paint a picture.) I wonder what your thoughts might be though. I'd love a dive into "false positives" in general if that interests you! Thanks!

[@crownandcountryside]

I am a 9 and I'd definitely turn it into something fun, like making a picnic with whatever we had with us. But if something causes me to go over the break, my 8 will come out and I'll be on the phone like Kenzi. 😂

[@CyberGirl1234]

lol this one definitely makes me think i’m a 1. wild. i didn’t think i was a logical type

[@Sleepykatzi]

also im type 4 wing 5

[@classicat87]

Always love your content! Do the harmonic triads present differently with counter types?

[@darkcreatureinadarkroom1617]

Inwardly they shouldn't, but outwardly? Absolutely! You should always keep countertypes in mind when trying to guess someone else's type to try and minimize mistakes. As a counter-four in that situation I'd probably be seen either withdrawing into a corner to hide and cry alone while Googling what to do (pointless because nobody listens to me anyways, but it's better than nothing), chasing someone in the positive triad to try and stay out of the way and minimize my own freaking out or, if everyone else was freaking out and proving to be completely useless, screaming at everybody to get themselves together and regain some semblance of control.

[@AbbeyHowe]

Love the advice above ⬆️ "You should always keep countertypes in mind."

[@the_real_littlepinkhousefly]

I'm a six and would totally be freaking out and imagning dying in the desert because what if we didn't have enough water, nobody came, or maybe a serial killer would come along and see us three vulnerable women and that would be the end of us. So if anyone is wondering if they're a Six and this is what their reaction would be -- you're a Six.

[@LizzMo]

Do you at some point switch into counterphobic mode, start troubleshooting and handling stuff, and refuse to let the situation conquer you? Or do you stay in phobic mode? I'm a 6w7, and I usually switch into counterphobic mode.

[@the_real_littlepinkhousefly]

@@LizzMo I do, depending on the thing. I'm constantly asking "Why did this happen? What could I have done to prevent it? How can I prevent it from happening again?" But I can't say I "refuse to let the situation conquer me". I get quite overwhelmed by difficult things, and am constantly in phobic mode. I'm 6w5, so the seeking answers thing comes from the 5 wing, IMHO. (But also, I'm an "unhealthy" Six, with a lot of mental health things going on like PTSD, trauma wiring, severe OCD, etc., medical PTSD ... so all that stuff predisposes me to fear and feeling helpless, and also pushes me to try to find ways to prevent Bad Things in the first place.)

[@claytonia1586]

Oh man, I always type as a 4w5 or a 6w5. But in this situation I would have done exactly what you did. So could it be that I'm a 5 but get a lot of influence from both of my wings?

[@genevievegareaumosse3509]

I REALLY LOVE ALL OF YOUR VIDEOS! And I REALLY want to take part in "Find your type" workshop on April 15th. I have been so busy and overwhelmed over the past weekend and last few days that I cannot remember (senior moments) if I've paid for this workshop already or not. I can't find a receipt in my inbox. How can I find out whether or not I'm already registered? I don't want to pay twice. THANK YOU....

[@AbbeyHowe]

Just checked and you are all signed up! I will be sending out emails this week with info about the workshop. So excited to hang out with you!!

[@loganbyrd2024]

Will you put this in a play list with your other triad video?

[@fudgesolo6352]

Me, a type 2, when I don't get what I need: 😶 ... "Actually, I didn't even need to have my needs met in the first place if I really think about it! In fact, I'm gonna start listing off the reasons that it's actually better that I didn't get what I needed. I'm definitely fine and not in any way disappointed. Therefore, I will not openly express my initial, very incorrect and completely invalid, negative feelings to anyone at all whatsoever.😀"

[@loganbyrd2024]

An interesting video would be kinks for each enneagram type. I'm a type 9 man and am very submissive and like furries and furry transformation. Might be a fun video for June, since that's pride month.

[@Adriana.Gabriela]

I'm 8w7, 845 tritype, but I go for a logical style. After I've kicked the car (or at least swore) 😂😂😂

[@mbtinerdie]

I dunno. I mean, I tend to say nothing. Or if stuff are tense, I try to comfort others in some way, yeah.

[@RhythmicReasons]

You skipped type 6 in the reactive section.. makes it even worse that 6 is prone to feelings of neglect or rejection 😂