five nights at freddys broke my brain

maybe it was kermint
PATREON: / nyxfears
SIGNED FLUIDS: nyxfears.bandc...
SIGNED GIRL FLESH: nyxfears.bandc...
#movies #fivenightsatfreddys #review

[@tommylakindasorta3068]

I didn't realize Josh Hutcherson had made it off the island. Good for him.

[@vvakeupdonnie]

This is a niche comment 👏

[@ingridarmona6526]

lmaoooo I was just thinking abt that

[@astridtheterrible]

My favourite part was when Josh Hutcherson got seduced by sexy and cool William Afton and his champagne and his hot girl robe in the island. How could vanessa have known that when she said "there make be snakes!" just how right she was.

[@TheAbigailDee]

LMFAOOOOOOO NOOOO. Caitlyn must have let him free

[@era_s]

*OUT of

[@Phished123]

A lot of people dont know this but Markiplier screaming at the game actually opened a rift in space time and sent us into an alternate reality where a movie about murderous employees of Charles Entertainment Cheese was possible.

[@elijahkonrad5130]

That MatPat cameo was a jumpscare

[@diegodankquixote-wry3242]

Matpat looks old now and that made me feel very sad.

[@somecanadiangirl1]

May cut it off but he does in fact say "but that's just a theory"

[@eligma4399]

My sister yelling "MATPATASMATPAT!!!" I jumped outta my skin.

[@elijahkonrad5130]

@@somecanadiangirl1 heinous

[@RedSpade37]

​@@diegodankquixote-wry3242 That's what happens when you simultaneously whip & nae-nae...

[@SorasShadow1]

I think at its core the biggest problems with trying to translate fnaf into a movie is that fnaf isn't really a story, it's barely a horror experience once you're used to the jump scares. The original creator was good at mystery boxes that kept MatPat fed for the last decade, not crafting a compelling narrative experience.

[@cannibalisticrequiem]

I wouldn't give Scott that much credit. He captured lightning in a bottle with the first game. Then MatPat went rabid trying to "piece the puzzle pieces of a much larger story together", and Scott tuned into every FNAF Game Theory with a notepad and pencil, wrote down all of Mat's ideas, and slightly tweaked them juuuuust enough that he could appear as this galaxy brain genius the fandom believes him to be who had everything planned out from the beginning and was always one step ahead of everyone - and people bought it hook line and sinker! It turned into this oroborous cycle of Scott taking MatPat's ideas and putting them into the game, Mat trying to further piece together the puzzle, only for Scott to add the "new lore" Mat came up with to the next installment, and fans lapped that shit up, praising Scott for his "genius" as well as "how awesome he was for interacting with the fanbase" (because he needed the ideas).

[@SorasShadow1]

@@cannibalisticrequiem i'll fully admit i tapped out of the scene pretty early, and was never that interested in MatPat's output but that's a good point that they almost certainly fed off each other at least the kids got something to enjoy, and the practical effects that i've seen so far have been excellent. just a shame it was wasted on fnaf specifically.

[@phoneguy8369]

I would argue that as of Pizzeria Simulator, Scott had accidentally stumbled his way into having created a compelling narrative that wrapped up nicely. It wasn't perfect or even especially great, but it was passably dramatic and interesting, and provided a new lens with which to view the prior games which is always a plus imo. The first five games could be looked at in an entirely different light after the sixth, with the understanding that you're playing as the same protagonist in each game-- with the surprisingly solid motivation of correcting his father's mistakes and seeking redemption after the accidental murder of his younger brother. Scott then proceeded to totally screw the pooch by continuing the narrative and ruining the sacrifices made in the sixth game's ending. That said, the games' plot is weird enough that converting it into movie form would be difficult to say the least. They did not do a good job here and most of the changes only somehow made the plot MORE convoluted and confusing???

[@Che1Angelius]

The problem is that he over complicated a simple story when FNAF became popular. Guessing if they do a sequel that Vanessa is possessed by her dad. The story is just a serial killer that sticks his victim in the animatronics.

[@solus8685]

They could've easily made this scary. Just make the animatronics look less smooth and new, overall show them less, don't humanize them and make them move stiffly

[@ThisIsTheWater]

Ironically, i'm sure Scott Cawthon will use his profit from this movie to fund a child crushing machine

[@cidevant002]

No, he will use it to fund the campaign of Ron de Santis. You know, for the economy!

[@ThisIsTheWater]

@@cidevant002 Like I said, a child crushing machine

[@cloud_and_proud]

Why would they make the Freddy's Pizzaria closed down? I feel like that makes it way less creepy. Like a part of the horror of being a night guard at Freddy's is knowing that like every day children come and eat pizza with the murder robots stuffed with corpses

[@elizabethkirton6063]

That shaggy scene was my legit trans awakening

[@dominicburke8908]

That scene made me bisexual fr

[@FinalGirl09]

This movie shot my dog.

[@Hsjsjskekdocienskspsbebdvd]

LMFAOOOOOO

[@dullroar2673]

Cawthon: We finally did it, everyone *wipes tear from eye* *signs check for 50k to help fund a gay conversion camp*

[@aviculor]

Honestly, it turned out the way it deserved to turn out. A PG-13 rating where the day is saved by reminding the animatronics that the yellow rabbit man killed them since they forgot. I mean, this was Scott Cawthon's big chance to have his series' lore finally make sense, but sure, let's have a family drama about the security guard. Who in the games might have actually been William Afton's son using an alias.

[@PanAndScanBuddy]

You didn't even mention that the reason he takes his sister is because the babysitter got bitten in fucking half. It was so ridiculous I laughed my ass off.

[@nspade9252]

This movies script surely started every page with "and then"

[@FurbyFullyLoaded]

I find it weird that they made Abby Josh Hutcherson’s sister instead of his daughter with a deceased wife Disney-style. The custody battle subplot would make way more sense if the aunt was a grieving mother-in-law who never liked her daughter’s choice of husband and wants to get a second chance at motherhood by getting custody of her granddaughter. Not to mention that when you consider how close in age Josh Hutcherson and his dead brother are implied to be compared to the HUGE gap between him and his sister gives the distracting and likely unintentional vibes that Abby was an accidental pregnancy.

[@minnymoon1360]

Actually, this makes way more sense

[@ringofbrass]

more likely Abby was an attempt to "replace" their lost child. or to save their marriage. it didn't work and Abby very much understands this is the way kids internalize that stuff.

[@neen2660]

@@ringofbrassmakes the most sense. I was telling my brother it was surprising they had another kid at all after that

[@BlackSheepNara]

Well, I'm 17 years older than my younger brother and we both have the same parents. Being that much older than his sister was actually relatable.

[@b3dubbs72]

I'm just disappointed that Markaplier didn't pop in with his iconic line "WAS THAT THE BITE OF 87??"

[@Kairi98503]

Honestly, I like this movie for just how bizarre it is. The entire thing feels like a bad 2010s creep pasta fanfic that was given too high of a budget. Just randomly throwing in references from all over the series, random cute slice of life moments that have no real reason being there, and characters having the emotional depth of a wooden spoon. Also Matthew lizard doing his best manic tim curry performance that he could at the end and the accurate ass Muppets that feel more like characters for a hallmark Christmas special then horror creatures were just the cherry on top for me. Was it good? No. Was Matpat the most legitimately shocking thing about it? Yes. Do I enjoy it because it feels like a type of liminal bad that feels like I once liked this thing as a kid but looking back I don't know what I was thinking but the nostalgia keeps it on my shelf? Also yes! I hope they make more of these and lean harder into the 'middle schooler directs a high budget movie' feel. I hope they have an abandoned mall shopping montage in the next one.

[@ringer1324]

I already had a hole in my head so this movie just went straight through it

[@rudebega1494]

Trapped on a FNAF with josh hutcherson

[@Leafpool2]

God what I wouldn't give to see that story be told

[@tyfoon555]

I've seen a lot of people praise the fort scene and the humanizing/all-they-want-is-love characterizing of the animatronics. They say that it was a great choice to remind us that these spirits are kids at heart and not just nameless evil. But, like, really? I'm up with the games and the lore and the thing I like about the story of the games is that this isn't a Scooby-Doo story of putting spirits to a peaceful rest. I find it much more compelling that the kids' spirits *are* bloodthirsty. They're angry. Give this movie an R rating so we can see the fact that these ghost children want to tear Lillard apart limb from limb and slowly torture him. There's a game where the spirits of the kids literally keep his body and soul burning for - if they had their way - all eternity

[@eligma4399]

I think older fans like us would've liked it but you know they gotta accommodate that child audience, lest they exclude their money-makers.

[@tyfoon555]

The picture on the wall deus ex machina is something that's from the books. And even then it was written pretty damn silly in the movie. The idea being that the spirits are lashing out everywhere in anger because they've forgotten who it is that killed them. Putting a drawing on a wall eh I guess it kind of makes sense. Still doesn't feel good though

[@ToonCatTV]

This ain't your Boomer's fnaf

[@Che1Angelius]

Shaggy is there as a simple work consular. Yellow bunny is something

[@solus8685]

That's what I'm saying. These spirits have lived in those suits for decades, why tf are they still behaving just like innocent little kids?

[@MrCheesePudding]

"oh noo, is the policeman gonna shoot my dog?" i lost it

[@jem5771]

thank you for reminding me of those two old people absolutely convinced that their dancing halloween skeleton toy was possessed

[@c-puff]

Believe it or not... this movie's plot actually is the game's "plot". Also to answer your rhetorical question; yes this is Markiplier's fault

[@dl9371]

At first i was like 'wow mae really went into this with Expectations, huh?' and then i realized people were saying this was a good movie???? Absolutely not at all -- but me and my partner honestly had fun watching it. Not well written at all, extremely limited by the rating system it was forced to keep, but honestly the work that went into the animatronics and setting were so fun. Mike and Abby honestly were very fun traumatized siblings, and I liked that they didn't just make a movie about a dude in a room. Recommending this movie is impossible without giving the caveat that it's absolute garbage and just overall a quintessential video game movie which means it can't get over a D+ grade in the slightest.

[@thegoat20066]

My favorite part of the movie was when Freddy Fuckboi got bred by MatPat

[@RevelationsPrimo]

Tbat was the best scene

[@eligma4399]

Josh wasn't bad, his performance was probably one of the few highlights. The set looked alright and the animatronics looked true to the games. I couldn't understand why Vanny was there and I really wish she wasn't, she wasn't necessary and talked like the unbearable protagonist of a chick-flick. I think maybe they gave Scott too much control over the writing because if you've read any of his books they're a little nonsensical and this was reminiscent of that. I get they wanted to go for a pg-13 rating but did they really need adult characters to scream shit like "OH MY GOODNESS!!! WHAT THE HECK??!!" Why not just have them scream? 🤦 And Matthew Lillard's freakout at the end was the antithesis of intimidating it was just utter shit.I read in an interview that they wanted Vanessa and Mike to have like a bond over shared trauma but we didn't see that...? I liked the scene where Mike wakes up and his sister is just stood there, surrounded by the robots *but then something incredible happens* she goes "Sleepover!!" And he's like "I think it's a bad idea" and Vanny ignores him only for her suddenly say "I told you so" when the girl gets electrocuted.

[@jadewelling3459]

Scott definitely has a decisiveness problem lmao

[@cannibalisticrequiem]

A LITTLE nonsensical?? Bro fucking gives birth to an animatronic!! Scott could make a second living as an author of body horror novels for actual adults if he wanted, but he's kneecapped by the fact that he heavily relied on all of MatPat's ideas for his games, so when he actually has to write something for himself, he comes up with the shit in Fazbear Frights where the stories become increasingly unhinged as it seems there's no one left to reign Scott in and tell him "No" every once in a while - they're too busy jilling him off with reassurances of his latent genius. The weak attempts at swearing can easily be explained by the fact that Scott is a hardcore Christian Fundamentalist, and because they're deeply uncomfortable with swearing, they self-censor the hell out of themselves. But Scott also wants to appear cool to his audience of 12-year-olds and adults that stopped emotionally developed at 12, so he tries to come up with swears that attempt to sound intimidating, such as, "Oh my goodness! What the heck was that??", "Jiminy Crickets!!", "Gosh darn it!!", and so on.

[@slaughteredwolf]

Josh was acting his heart out and frankly I loved it. It was like watching somebody going for an awards caliber performance in a straight to video movie.

[@FreshestBleach]

Hopefully this can help you, but it seems like the movies are more following the books and not the games! :3

[@Che1Angelius]

I agree, josh was fine, Shaggy was over the top but he did good as Afton. Vanessa, for me is the weakest point. Abby was fine, but the same as Vanessa was pointless except the bonding with the children. Their trauma connection was weird and I was semi expecting that one the animatronics was his brother. I wonder if their is a sequel, that Vanessa acts like shaggy.

[@Plutoburns]

I think this movie was, inspite of itself, really trying for something. The whole lucid dreaming thing, the fun fort time with the little girl, the theme about pictures laid down with hammer blows. Its a friggin mess and barely any of it works. I still cant believe that the Banana Splits movie is the best of the animatronic horror movies

[@witchfynder_finder]

Honestly it took me until this video to actually believe a Five Nights at Freddy's movie was actually happening. I think my brain just refused to accept it as a self-defense mechanism

[@TheAbigailDee]

Also PG13 horror is so hard to do well. I know thats not the major issue but still.

[@mollylong3571]

Genuinely! No one will save you is pg13 and even though I really enjoyed it, and the first 20 minutes were pretty tense and creepy, it ends up way more like a Spielberg esque super 8 type movie than a horror film

[@zavierlee695]

I was high as balls in the theatre. The beginning actually hyped me up. Then the fort scene happened and we realized we were halfway through the movie and nothing cool was gonna happen.

[@neen2660]

I chugged a twisted tea and hit my pen right before it lol

[@ZanahorioGaymes]

Watched it last night and got this nagging feeling that the movie, from the very start, is desperate to end. A lot of the movie would've been way better if anything at all was allowed to develop at any point in time, but instead the movie as a whole feels like a sparknotes version of the "real" FNaF movie, trying to give the viewer as much information as they can about the "real" movie before it ends. Except, of course, there's no "real" FNaF movie other than this one. Tbh it's surprisingly competent given the awful production cycle it had, but "surprisingly competent" isn't a good thing to say about anything lol also god the climax is so cringey I'm so glad I pirated this movie and watched it alone in the comfort of my own home instead of surrounded by people

[@neen2660]

Agree. Me and my brother scrunched nose at the pacing

[@emiliestinson3086]

Putting aside Scott Cawthon's history of taking his FNAF money and donating as much of it as he was legally allowed to every virulently transphobic politician he can find, this movie was boring, had exactly one moment that made me feel anything other than boredom and disappointment with myself, and felt like it was made for TV rather than a wide release - but then, the Banana Splits movie was made for TV, and it was actually watchable.

[@breadordecide]

Lets all remember that scott said he refused many bad scripts so that hollywood wouldn’t mess up his game….and yet….

[@noritochip_97]

Why am I just learning this now?? What the heck?

[@emiliestinson3086]

@@noritochip_97 Because it wasn't super widely publicized and anyone who dared say anything bad about Scott Cawthon got dogpiled by his fans, even attempting to dox one guy for it. Scott tried saying he loves trans people, and even donated to Democrats like Nancy Pelosi, who is also virulently anti-trans. After about a week, he published an "apology" and said he wouldn't be making the games anymore, just supervising them. This was all right around the 2020 election, I think.

[@Che1Angelius]

@hausu1977 Nic cage the legend movie, Wooly's wonderland. Almost no lines and him destroying those satanist.

[@ashleyleckwold5091]

I’ll always laugh that Patrick Stump from Fall Out Boy composed the music for the Banana Splits movie and then did a really banger version of the theme song for the credits

[@pablotranchellfilms9548]

It absolutely is a bizarre piece of avant garde art. And tbh I don’t mind if it knows it is or not. It’s fucking so enjoyable if you take it as this that I really don’t care what they were trying to do lmao. Just so fucking deliriously silly and strange ! Loved the video.

[@SewerTapes]

I hope the sequel is about Josh Hutcherson's murder trial after the aunt was found dead in his home.

[@ike804]

“Written for the fans” is just code for “Its just shitty reference bait, but its fine since I get the reference”

[@dianisea-hh4uf]

the window of time between the first trailers and the release when people were joking abt how kids would be seeing gruesome death scenes and shit was so funny and even more in retrospect cause from what i've seen it looks like the most kiddie horror movie ever made hsfgh like what did yall expect from youtuber game

[@MeonLights]

Six?! SIX SCREENWRITERS?! I mean I didn't watch it but that is a bad sign. Great review though 😂

[@lostedge7852]

The maybe it was Gonzo line fucking killed me lol

[@starless_void]

Wow who could've known that someone known for their tendency to try and accumulate as much money as possible to donate to anti-LGBT legislators would make a bad film relying on only the brand to sell out. Whoa.. I-I just blacked out for a second. Did something happen?

[@elijahkonrad5130]

I can’t believe they would rip off Willy’s Wonderland

[@biggestastiest]

REAL 😤😤😤

[@raysofred]

They should have cast Nicholas Cage for every role in this movie. It’s not like he’d have said no.

[@shanmarie000]

idk why i never remember the hunger games as josh’s most memorable role. i always think of zathura when he’s mentioned lol

[@HeavyWeapons52]

Bridge to Terabithia always comes to mind lol

[@shanmarie000]

@@emisformaker wow i had to look that up that was… something

[@gregstinkston7634]

I got together with my pals had some drinks and pirated the movie. We were so bored untill the characters just stated that ghosts are real and then had a slumber party with said ghosts we were laughing till and after the credits appeared. But untill ten sheesh what a snore.

[@tomfoolery-4444]

"is that. why this. HAPPENED, to me??!" is going to be on a loop in my head for decades

[@CtrlAltJon]

My parents had Without a Paddle on DVD; I’ve seen it more than once. I can still pull quotes from it.

[@RivenLove]

I like FNAF and I enjoyed watching the movie. But I wanted to see the animatronics doing more and killing more people. And I think it was weird that there weren't more jumpscares. Also I think it's funny how popular FNAF is with little kids. Some of the kids in the theater were definitely not born yet whenever the first games came out and I doubt they've ever experienced a charles entertainment cheese

[@meganvincent5381]

The animatronics are hilariously unscary, they're too similar to the game models and they just look friend shaped and soft

[@oneterrorbyte]

i haven't considered myself a fan of FNAF in at least half a decade so most of the expanded lore (the books, spinoffs, etc.) is lost on me, but i thought a lot of the intrigue irt FNAF as a narrative was unraveling the tragedy of children losing their lives from senseless violence, and the grief and anger that subsequently follows said violence, even years/decades after the fact. this movie is supposedly extrapolating on the perspective of someone who has finally figured out the kidnapper/murderer of their brother after years of searching for answers in their dreams, and not finding any solace in it but instead only more confusion as all their grieving was only a piece in a seemingly much larger puzzle; as well as the several children that never got to live out the rest of their lives and have to haunt the establishment they were killed in their afterlives, eternally harboring their anger and sorrow. like conceptually, yeah, there is a good premise for an at least half-decent mystery-horror movie, but it's incredibly bogged down by also being the same franchise that's simultaneously the matpat golden goose and the subject of many a forced-jumpscare-reaction SEO-bait let's play video. there is a near-decade's worth of expectations for what an official FNAF movie would be that i'm sure highly impacted the production of this movie, and none of those expectations aligned with whatever avant-garde psychological-horror gorefest that better directors and writers could probably come up with. i feel like i'll still live a fulfilling life without seeing ari aster's take on chica's cupcake mauling a deliquent i forgot the name of. so of course the end result is whatever subpar, semi-coherent yet painfully literalist storyline they could make of the first three games, with some youtuber cameos thrown in for extra points from the youtube reviewers/gamers with fanbases of mostly children that this movie was made to appeal to.

[@yusahana6323]

Oh thank cheezus for this. I was wondering if I was getting gaslit by all the glowing reviews and reactions. "For the fans" and "it's not supposed to win awards" is not an excuse for this mess of a movie.

[@FreshestBleach]

It is tho bc for fans this whole movie made complete sense 😭 I’m not trying to change ur opinion I’m just trying to explain why this movie does have a lot of support from the die hard fans :,)

[@breadordecide]

Fans just want to be “serviced.” The rest of us like story, character, and some form of entertainment in our movies. But hey…they got to see animatronic animals and that is enough for them.

[@yusahana6323]

@@FreshestBleach I understood the movie just fine. I wasn't confused. I just didn't see the point of the huge changes when the original story is fine enough and could have been better translated over. I'm not trying to change your mind - I'm just telling you that looking at it from outside "yay it's a thing I like", this movie doesn't make sense, and "it's for the fans" is not an excuse for the mess the rest of us see.

[@yusahana6323]

You can like a thing and still recognise it's not great or that there are issues with it. I love the Dark Knight trilogy, but there are plenty of issues with it and I'm capable of recognising that. I would never tell you "well for die hard fans it's the best thing ever" if you didn't enjoy it. Just putting that out there.

[@FreshestBleach]

@@yusahana6323 I'm not championing the movie, my mind has been changed about fnaf as a whole bc scott is a pos. That being said, idk how it was a mess. It was made with the books in mind and not the games. and i deffo know i can like not great things, ppl are just saying its a mess without giving any reasons and thats just not in good faith i feel just cuz they didn't like it

[@KennyFrierson]

Matthew Lillard doesn't even say check out my awesome pecs

[@OldTimeyPisspector]

I wonder if the long-standing belief that "its impossible to make a good FNaF movie" has completely confused people on how to react. Like, is it a case where, "it's an impossible movie to make, so no matter what, it will be bad" makes people think "if the movie is not a good movie, that makes it a good FNaF film"?

[@it_is_i_deo]

Firstly, I love just how hard you're taking this. Godspeed. Secondly, I'm honestly just glad that it didn't end up a generic slasher film like blood and honey did, especially after how long it spent in the oven. I will take confusing and underwhelming ober outright disappointing and uninspired.

[@asmolbird]

I personally loved the movie so I may not agree with what's beign said but BUT. Folks who loved the movie: Valid Folks who had issues with the movie: valid. Ngl yeah, Scott can be hella scuffed with writing.

[@leahrebecca2051]

The way you say “chunky cheese” is sending me 💀

[@wanderingdude777]

Markiplier said he couldn't make it in the movie for a cameo due to a Blood Ocean scheduling conflict, but I know the King of FNAF knew the film was beneath him

[@Feasco]

He was working on the film starring Dethklok?

[@diegobrando2750]

"I KNOW WHO YOU AAAAAAAAARE"

[@Mysterynovus]

They knew fans would like it regardless of quality because FNAF fans are some of the easiest to entertain lol

[@catserver8577]

Hey buddy, I may have only made it through two nights of the FNAF, but I am terrified of animatronics. I'm a fan of the series, and not only did I boycott this movie, but May just basically showed me all that I didn't miss. This film was clearly made for some poor slob's inner child. Let them have their fun.

[@solus8685]

As a former fnaf fan, this is the realest thing I've ever read

[@alonsomedinatito7444]

It's the way you said "Freddy FuckBear" that really got me 😂😂😂

[@yandereskitty]

I wanted to love this. But why was vanessa there. Everyone says it's not her but do they think we are idiots. How coincidental is it that we just get a game with a security officer named vanessa and also is tied to the disappearance of children, then to have a movie with the same character name. It made no sense to me. At all. I honest to goodness thought it was gonna go the security breach route. I wouldn't of minded that. Also it's five nights at freddys and we don't even get a night 1 to night 5 montage yknow like the games. They tried so bad to merge all the games into one that it messed the story up .

[@innoc4063]

My soul wanted to violently tear out of my body after seeing that Matpat cameo.

[@catserver8577]

You might be my spirit animal. lol May: "and tells him if he brings his sister there again she will shoot him" Me: LOLOLOLOL Vanessa: "If you bring her here again I will shoot you." Me: Oh. OH MY.

[@ashton7282]

This movie is not good. It’s a big fucking mess. However, as someone who hyperfixated on fnaf for years as a kid, I think this is kind of the perfect fnaf movie. It’s messy, it doesn’t make any sense, it’s frustrating, it’s really dumb, but so are the games. I think that’s why I ended up liking the movie, it didn’t feel like it took itself too seriously. It was a jumbled up unserious mess, just like the games I grew up with. It’s exactly what I expected it to be, and my autistic ass I absolutely okay with that.

[@skeletonsinscarves3965]

My roommate and I died when we heard thelivingtombstone at the end

[@animalcharmer6321]

Just so you know if you watch this movie after edible it’s a 5/5 and it’s your favorite movie

[@cinnamonbonk]

I dunno why they bothered with an actually licensed one, we already got the nick cage parody.

[@lesliemartin3]

There were so many variables in this movie that totally seemed like missed opportunities. Why was the kid his sister and not his daughter? How old was he supposed to be? And why would his dream be so far fetched if the souls of dead children haunting animatronics was perfectly acceptable?....

[@zurirobinson2749]

I can't remember where I read this at this point but somewhere I read that the security guard is canonically 25 (even though in the context of the game that means that a 15 year old, old enough to know better, accidentally got his 6 year old brother killed for the lulz). I guess a 25 year old with a late elementary school aged child is less probable than them being siblings. But if the movie was going to throw out the timeline of the first 4 games entirely they could have just aged him up slightly and made it his daughter.

[@hurricanerae]

I highly recommend watching Willy's Wonderland starring a mute Nick Cage whose character "The Janitor" I have written as Autistic in my head cannon. It's not a perfect movie, but is a fun ride that sounds infinitely better than whatever garbage this FNAF movie resulted in. Also, feel bad for Josh Hutcherson. Wonder if he really needed the money. I loved him in Future Man.

[@orangeblaster500]

I’m still trying to figure out how the fuck this film is “for the fans” when literally every change they make is significantly less interesting than the games. But then again I feel like I’m the only fan willing to admit the creator using his profits to fund pro life politicians means we shouldn’t be giving him more of our money and just pirate this shit. I’m a fan of the first 6 games and their lore(which I actually find super compelling), not a FNAF fan. That’s a huge difference and it means I hate this film.

[@ChiliDishGambino]

They went & did the impossible, they went & made FNAF even worse

[@algordon9387]

People reacting positively to Markiplier screaming at the games is why this movie exists, yes, but Markiplier may not have gotten as big as he did if he didn’t learn tips from Northernlion on how to become a big video game personality. So basically this movie is Northernlion’s fault

[@fungusable]

the movie is like objectively bad in a lot of ways but i love it

[@fungusable]

so so so so fucking stupid lol and so fun

[@forestarden4406]

I feel really bad, i genuinely enjoyed this movie. It made my heart happy and i grew up on fnaf. I really enjoyed it.

[@stonyponyofficial]

saw this in theaters with friends who are real fnaffers, and they along with every other 20 something in that midnight showing who was definitely under 16 when the movie was announced had a BLAST. favorite parts were the pillow fort montage/Bonnie thumbs up within and the living tombstone end credits. least favorite part was after the movie when my friends were decidedly calling it "camp"

[@TheCMWProductions1]

Also, the Spring Trap suite looked awesome.

[@minnymoon1360]

It really did

[@ringofbrass]

i never played the games, watched some let's plays years ago. binged some lore videos recently because i was bored and i find lore i have no investment in fascinating. so i had fun except the biggest crime, my girl Cassidy was replaced with some little boy as the ghost kid in golden Freddie. after the lore videos all i cared about was the angry little girl who literally dragged and held afton in his own personal hell under her control. i thought that was very good. but the movie had some little boy. :( (i suppose he could be the crying child but but that does not make sense.)

[@DeathAlchemist]

I have never seen May be this simultaneously angry and confused in a video at the same time. Also, yeah those script rewrites happened because Scott wasn't satisfied with the initial scripts iirc.

[@jakestrider3565]

In my opinion it was trying so hard to be a horror movie that it looped around to an absurdist comedy! It was very funny to me, specifically. I got jumpscared a few times bc I am a dork that jumps everytime there's a noise ever. Then again I did just have brain surgery so I am not the best judge of what is and isn't a good movie right now lmao

[@Scribbled_Death]

This film made me wish I wasn't 3 years sober

[@itsmarthai]

i thought matthew lillard was perfect for this, i'm not sure if this is a compliment to either part

[@passthehanky]

The thing is, it’s just not that fuckin deep.

[@deityla]

scott was never a good writer and no one likes him but cutes animatronics good YAY 😊

[@drinks_menu]

I don’t accept scooby doo slander sorry may

[@longlivethesheet4561]

My favorite part of the FNAF movie was when Poppy’s Playtime asked Freddy to join amogus in the Backrooms to fight Skibidi Toilet

[@somecanadiangirl1]

th-this is just Night at the Museum with murder

[@crowboi9216]

Ive been having a shitty day mentally and this video absolutely cheered me up. May just knows exactly when to upload❤❤❤much love

[@nekobun]

i went in mostly blind having bounced hard off the first game, and there was so little on offer for anyone unfamiliar with the material. someone please explain the funko pop jumpscare they thought was good enough to do three whole-ass times. it was also one of the least interestingly shot films i've seen in a while, with nearly all the line delivery being done in centered, relatively close shots of the actors with no dynamism to any of it, and the few instances of them finding somewhere interesting to shoot were completely squandered. like, that bit where sleepy guy and lady cop are chatting by a creek or river? there's this half-burnt-out house you see across the water that you catch a couple glimpses of and it's more interesting to wonder what its deal is than anything else going on. it was also kind of funny that a movie that telegraphed the big twist right from the jump ("huh, wing commander's lt. todd 'maniac' marshall's acting kind of weird after reading this guy's name") and kept being not subtle at all had to then hit the audience with the YOU'RE GETTING SEQUELS bat at least three times as things were wrapping up. oh and why'd they keep going back to that shot with the soda spilling and fizzing on the end of the table? or keep blanking out different dream kids' faces briefly whenever the sleepster encountered them? like i get weird for the sake of weird or whatever but it just felt thrown in there for no reason.

[@Man-wolf-]

The funko pop jumpscare is honestly more of an inside joke lol everybody hates balloon boy in the games As for the soda-its to just bring emphsis on mike trying to focus on key elements from his dreams to remeber what happened to his brother / who stole him Same w the kids faces bein blured, the ghosts are essaintly blank slates they dont remeber anything(which made it easy for william to hsve them belief his a friend) the only one who isnt is the blonde boy leader - seeing as he doesnt even help the other four kill abbey he only appers when william is dying and even left a clue for mike in the form of a rabbit drawing

[@binkusbonkus]

i watched this with a friend who loves FNAF, and it was a transcendental experience

[@renegadecut9875]

I loved this. (the video, not the movie, which I haven't seen)

[@DinoChecksOut]

write the movie? oh no i'm afraid i haven't written the movie. i just blum myself

[@SnowDayJ]

Idk why the "Critics' Opinions don't matter!" Crowd defend the biggest piles of trash.

[@KickinRadTopHat]

Those types are driven more by a desire to make their perceived enemies mad than they are actually liking anything.

[@SnowDayJ]

@@KickinRadTopHat I don't think so in this case. I think it's just fans being genuinely blind to the quality of the movie they got. It looks accurate, but man is that movie rough.

[@whym6438]

Good to hear your voice, May. This was a fun video.

[@o.steinman3855]

“well-cared-for Hollywood face”

[@unplaceableface]

this is so lovely, I didn't know anything about this FNAF thing, and I couldn't help feeling like it wasn't really a scary thing. But now I understand that it's more of a smoking weed movie. I was confused bc weed movies are usually low-budget. They probably could've spent less money on this.

[@rocklobster590]

Mayyyyyyyy can i have the link to the lady going "LEAVE THIS HOUSE !!" at the halloween decoration pleaaaase

[@lulucool45]

seconded

[@webigaza]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/e4aVcnyuoN2crcksi=T4d0Rlg2GPFprFpa

[@whocare9942]

Put "toy skeleton haunted and possessed" in the search, you'll find the whole 12 minutes of boomers yelling at a broken toy

[@BoredLori]

Watched this movie as a drinking game and i thoroughly enjoyed it. All i had to do was take a shot every time they said: night, 87, freddy, bonnie, chica, foxie, william afton, every death, every time a phone was on screen, every time they said purple.

[@markalexander3659]

Both the movie and this video made me feel like I'm having what my psych would call "an episode"

[@davidj.thompson]

Didn't Nick Cage make a "better" one of these types of movies?

[@Feasco]

it was Willy's Wonderland and it was miles better than this, no contest

[@bigsmellbad1187]

God this video is so funny. I really don't wish to see May in pain watching shitty movies but LET HER BE A HATER YAYYYY!!!! 🎉 my dog is so dead 💀💀 these videos are coming out so quickly I feel blessed. Happy Halloween!!!!!!

[@fempilled]

Mike in my head every time May lays an RLM Easter egg: I KNOW WHAT THAT IS!!

[@Twigaroni]

I didn't realize what the plot of this franchise was until i watched this movie and i can't believe how much more sense Willy's Wonderland makes than whatever this is lol Why are the victimized dead kids evil lol

[@tiddieappreciator5370]

sat and eager for whenever the iron lung review drops

[@everyvillainislemons7583]

Kremit

[@TheAbigailDee]

Honestly my only reason to watch and enjoy is to see those practical effects!!! I wish I could just convince theatres wr want these practical effects and puppets and machines rather than cgi without going

[@carolinekane361]

I mean at least the cop died

[@UnCreativeBeliever]

But she didn't, she ended up in a hospital bed with the ambiguous ending of her possibly waking up... ugh