Five Things That Helped Me Heal My Toilet Anxiety!

[@LaurenRose.]

This video is the follow up to my original toilet anxiety videos (which can be found here--- kzbin.info/www/bejne/oH3FipKwZp2amqM and here --- kzbin.info/www/bejne/nZaln6KhbLl5hMU) The e-book can be purchased on my website at www.iamlaurenrose.com/books

[@olharymarchuk3369]

I remember the first time I told about my boyfriend about this with eyes full of tears, he supported me, it was so revealing for me to get it off my chest. Now I'm still struggling with it, but my fears are less shameful then it was before

[@pranjal967]

This was so helpful and cathartic to hear someone else also experience similar. I have observed that a lot of time in actual situations we are really able to manage or try to find ways to manage, or actually quite flexible or more atuned with our body while it is the others who supposedly 'joke'/ 'bully' others over the basic human thing often are the thought that keeps ringing, it ain't even our own, yes some of it comes from our own past childhood experiences, but by and large the thoughts that make it so troubling aren''t even own but that of others guised as ours.

[@marissaprice6260]

You are the sole reason I started telling people I was dealing with this, and I think even just that part has helped so much. Thank you a million times over ❤

[@LaurenRose.]

oh wow, thank you so much, Marissa! 🥺 I'm very happy to hear that. Merry Christmas!

[@speckleshroom]

Thank you for this video. I'm struggling with toilet anxiety and it's really badly impacting my life. My toilet anxiety is the fear of going out in public and there not being a toilet. I'm 15 years and from the UK. I'm not too sure how my TA started, probably when i started Year 7 (secondary school) and having to get a bus every morning to get to my school. I think most people think "I'm about to go out so I'll just quickly go to the toilet" and i think that's grown as a habbit to me now. If i were to go out anywhere i need to not eat before, go to the toilet and let as much as i can out and leave the very minute i get off the toilet. It's really horrible doing this routine as it can damage my body. I'm in year 10 now and i get the bus every morning to school like i said. It takes about 5 mins to walk to my bus, 5 mins waiting, 15 mins on, and 7 mins before i can actually get to a toilet. I know that's not a lot of time, but it's just the feeling of not being able to go during them times and it's horrible. Like I've never had an accident yet it's still an accuring thought in my head everyday, and when i panic that's when i start to need to go. It's not just when there for sure isn't a toilet around, it's also in classrooms. I have a fear of asking to go in lessons, 1 because the teacher may say no (that could spike up my anxiety more), 2 the people in my class judge me (students in schools are horrid these days) and 3 just completely unable to go (e.g in PE lessons). All these cause my TA to be highted. I got given a toilet pass from my school's staff, which allows me to use the toilet during lesson because of medical reasons, and yet some teachers still get mad at me if i ask so it's almost pointless. Inbetween every lesson, at break and at lunch i feel like i MUST go to use the toilet to make sure I've emptied everything completely. However usually at the end of a school day, i feel more okay and normal as i know I'm just going home and that's that, end of a day, so that fear isn't there as much. When I'm at home, I'm completely normal and fine. I only feel like i need to go when i need to go! It's ALWAYS out in public. I really just want to get rid of it and be a normal human. Sorry this was very long 😅

[@rachealpike7986]

Hey I'm also from the UK, I'm 38 and I've been suffering with TA for about 6 years it was never a thing for me growing up but your whole story is exactly how I am always feeling so I just wanted to reach out and say I completely understand all what you're feeling and with videos like this that can help us it really is doable to heal, I've done so much more than I thought I could of I still have those thoughts and sensations but the have become less I'm still healing myself but it's nice to know we aren't alone and it can get better xxx

[@prod.YFX_]

Bro we share the same thing bro pls can u give me some solutions

[@moonie7155]

Thank you so much for this video! I’ve never heard of someone else dealing with this sort of anxiety, I thought I was alone 😢 this is my main source of agoraphobia

[@LaurenRose.]

You most certainly are not alone! I can absolutely relate to how it keeps you feeling homebound (or confined to a safe zone, wherever that may be) but I promise you, the more you get out there, the more it starts to ease.

[@moonie7155]

@@LaurenRose. thank you for your response! I have started exposures and can now go about 20 miles from my safe zone. I’m feeling it already start to lessen so that’s a great feeling. Still awesome of you to have the courage to talk about this. So many people need help with it! 💖

[@vincentolivieri4468]

​@@moonie7155i have the same issue. Any tips or advice? Did you recover and how did you do it? Im agoraphobic because of this. I can do little things but not longer than an hour and i always need an exit in case of bathroom urge😔

[@moonie7155]

@@vincentolivieri4468 hi! I started very slow, and I drove myself may be a mile down the road and I would keep doing that every day until I felt not panicking anymore and then I turned it into driving 5 miles and help doing that every day until I didn’t feel panicky and kind of just worked myself up to where I’m at now. I’m still working on driving with other people and letting other people drive me but I’m going to approach it the same way and just do it little by little. Baby steps! You can even start just by walking 100 feet or so from home and keep doing that until you don’t feel anxious about it anymore

[@vincentolivieri4468]

@@moonie7155 thankyou. I can already do little things like quick grocery or go to the store for a t shirt and stuff like that but aftrr an hour i just want to be home. I find it difficult to meet up with friends as well. Its so hard but we keep going. Nlwe gonna get our life back

[@jacosisaba]

Believe it or not, sever bathroom anxiety was one of the major factors that led to a opioid addiction. Taking a couple of pain killers not only solved the anxiety but also got rid of the need to use the restroom. It was like the miracle cure, at least until it took complete control of my life. Didn't help that quitting would lead to some of the worst stomach problems I've ever experienced. If I was brave enough to face the anxiety head on it would have saved me so much misery and pain.

[@ryanworthington6634]

My toilet anxiety seemed to come out of nowhere. I’ve always had a nervous stomach so even going to a bar or something fun I would get there and even though I wasn’t anxious, the anticipation made me have to use the restroom. Now my anxiety around the toilet is an awful cycle, the anxiety goes directly to my gut and my gut starts getting things going and then I become even more anxious. I’ve gotten a colonoscopy, seen doctors etc and they all just tell me my anxiety is triggering my gut. I’m going to start testing myself and doing the things you’ve explained. I’m hoping I can get past this, it feels like this last year was completely about when and where I could use a toilet.

[@LaurenRose.]

Sending love, Ryan. Mine seemed to come out of nowhere, too! The gut and brain connection is so strong, I completely get what you mean about the anxiety exacerbating the gut issues, which then further increases the anxiety! The good news about that connection is that when you really start to soften and open towards the fear of 'what if', not only does the anxiety lessen but the physical symptoms tend to dissappate, too. And then it gets to the stage where if physical symptoms do pop up, it doesn't send you into that tailspin of anxiety>bowel urgency>more anxiety. Keep us posted with how you go!

[@clam_chowder]

@ryanworthington6634 Reading this was like reading my own thoughts! Every single thing you said is exactly what I’ve experienced down to a T.

[@MindBodyBronx]

This video feels like I could’ve made it myself. Thank you so much for sharing and making me feel less shame surrounding this topic. Much love to you ❤

[@LaurenRose.]

You are so welcome!

[@maz4287]

I can relate to every word you say This has had a huge impact on my daily life for years. Thankyou for your help. Your amazing

[@LaurenRose.]

You are so welcome! Thank you for watching ❤️

[@Colonelclappyswife]

This is the third video in a row ive watched of yours, cannot stop crying! Never felt so understood. Thank you.

[@Kirstenkirstenful]

This is the best 24 minutes I've probably spent in the past 3 or 4 years! THANK YOU for being honest, transparent and human in sharing your own experience with this debilitating and life-limiting condition. This video is exactly what I needed to start my journey on overcoming toilet anxiety. I've subscribed to your channel and will read your book. I'm looking forward to my recovery! Thank you again!

[@LaurenRose.]

This is the most gorgeous comment!!!!! 😭❤️ keep me posted on your journey, I’d love to know how you get on!

[@pankurih2454]

My life is completely stuck and suffering from this anxiety,....I feel no way out of it and no doctors can help me..

[@danssaddimple9133]

thank you so much for these tips!

[@Vleurtj]

Thank you, Lauren. You definitely make things more bearable by sharing your experiences and tips. I wish you and your family a lovely Christmas!

[@LaurenRose.]

Thank you! That's very kind ❤️ I hope you have a beautiful Christmas, too.

[@tinaangen927]

I’m so glad I’m not alone ❤

[@Loreleify]

I have a pretty extreme case of this phobia, i feel like i waste so much fun times become of this. There was times where i would go to the grocery store 300 meters away in pampers for adults. For me its cramps and pain and diarrea which unfortunately happens once in a while, only making it more ingrained in my head...i dont know what to do. Morning cigarettes help cuz they make me poop and so calming me for the day "i dont have much inside so i should be able to hold it for a second if i get cramps". Its a handicap at this point. Whenever i go out with friends i dont enjoy myself, im calculating the distance, analysing the place, possibilities, the food i eat, the drinks i drink, i always have a poop bag, my boyfriend made me a kind of a toilet in the back of his car so i always want to take that car even if we have another smaller one which is more comfortable and we sometimes have a fight over it, etc etc. Your videos help me though, i have to take a plane in a month and im already stressing over it but like you said, even IF i poop myself, its okay, it happens, i can tell the flight attendants that i have panic attacks just in case, i am human and it can happen to anyone, thats okay. My problem is the fear of the pain cuz i lose the control of my body its so painful, i sweat, i cant speak, i have palpitations and feel like im gonna die. I made tests and been to the doctors, had many colonoscopies but there is nothing wrong with my bowels, its all in my head, but at times it just takes a second, a tiny thought "what if it happens right now" ...and off i go the paranoia city and get cramps. Im sick of it, its ruining my life.

[@terra_cotta6319]

Mine is so severe but it's the opposite...afraid I won't be able to go then I get the worst anxiety and tighten up and you can imagine the rest. I just want my life back.

[@Rksingerstar]

I have suffered by this

[@deloreangrl]

I fiiiiiinally set aside the time to properly watch this one and, to be honest, it was totally different than what I was assuming. No quick fixes! Loved that you touched on all mental aspects to accepting this fear. I’ll definitely be trying some of your tips and will grab the e-book as well!❤

[@LaurenRose.]

Awww yes!!!! I'm so happy to hear that. Definitely no quick fixes here! 😘

[@yourstrulylindsay]

Hey Lauren- i wrote u other day about Luvox. Wanted to tell you last nite I just started Remeron (Mirtazapine). It’s a SSRA. I was already mildly feeling it’s affects after first dose. I liked the feeling so was scared to take my Luvox cuz didn’t want it to overshadow the Remeron. Well it did & it wasn’t a good feeling. So goin off Luvox completely. What I wanted to share is that the doctors really push SSRI’s. The reason I tried Remeron is there was no worsening panic, anxiety or depression as a side effect. Which I seem to always feel when starting SSRI’s.

[@yourstrulylindsay]

This comment isn’t in response to ur above video lol. Just wanted to get the info to you if u ever look into something besides SSRI’s. Take care

[@LaurenRose.]

Thanks, Lin Ry! It's always helpful to have more knowledge and more resources/things to try. 🥰

[@ghjjhbi]

I think I got trauma from this, one day, was stressed so much thinking about my past mistakes and problems, went out with 2 girl friends (not girlfriends if you know what I mean hahah) and got a sensation of diarrhea, ran to the public bathroom and then they were shouting my name and embarrassing me while I was in the toilet, then I said I wasn't well and ran 10 minutes straight to home feeling that I was gonna shit myself, from there I got the fear of going outside, I have had diarrhea multiple times, but that exact time was bad bad, and that wasn't the real reason I feared going outside, the thing was that after that day, I was constipated for days, and then I was scared going outside, was so bad that the stress started effecting my stomach, and I was so scared of it happening again I stopped eating, I was already a really skinny guy, but got skinnier cuz I got scared to eat and it happening again, one time when I went to the hospital, 1 minute before entering the car I felt sick, it was the fight or flight effect, I felt not shaking, but trembling, I wanted to throw up and my legs were weak while I was going inside the car without them knowing, now I didn't pass grade cuz of not going to school cuz of this, after 9° grade everyone changes to a new school here, so, my only friends passed, and I didn't, so I'm alone now, because of this. And I still stress sirg my past. But thank you, finally found someone who relates to me

[@ellyw389]

thank you！

[@jasonmiller7805]

Hey was wondering how did you know it was anxiety at that time when you were still not well? Are you fine in safe places like at home but the urgency only acts up in certain situations?

[@LaurenRose.]

Initially I didn't think it was anxiety! I thought there had to be something wrong with me physically because of how often I felt the need to go. But I had so many tests done and everything came back inconclusive (or showed that I was a healthy, 'normal' young woman) and I got diagnosed with IBS, relating to anxiety. But yes, for the most part, I'd be fine if I was at home and there was no pressure to go anywhere. But the moment there was the slightest expectation on me (such as waking up in the morning, or knowing someone would be visiting, or needing to go somewhere, or having a phone call, or anything really) that urgency would hit.

[@jasonmiller7805]

@@LaurenRose. Really appreciate your reply! This reply is really helpful since I have watched your previous toilet anxiety videos a number of times but didn't know whether you were fine in 'safe' places. Currently I am dealing with bladder urgency for quite some time but I don't have a 'safe' place, the urgency is always present even when at home. Exposure didn't work for me too even after months. To others who read this do try exposure though, it may well work for you! It did help to build my confidence but I guess didn't address the underlying issue in my case. Running out of options but will discuss with my specialist to see what else there's left. Been dismissed by many doctors as just stress since I'm still relatively young. Thanks again!

[@kenyetamoses2797]

I HAVE TOILET PHOBIA AND I HAD IT EVERY SINCE I WAS IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL. AND ANOTHER THING, I DON'T LIKE TO USE THE RESTROOM IN PUBLIC PLACES ESPECIALLY AT THE GAS STATION BECAUSE RESTROOMS IN PUBLIC PLACES ESPECIALLY AT THE GAS STATION ARE NOT CLEAN, PLUS I HAVE A GREAT FEAR OF SEEING MILDEW IN THE RESTROOM TOILETS ESPECIALLY IN THE RESTROOMS AT GAS STATIONS, SO WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO GET OVER MY TOILET PHOBIA?

[@RinTohsaka-dn3lp]

18:21 ❤

[@Clarke2316]

I have had this for maybe 3-4 years now and its taking over my life! I'm a 33 year old man and finally had to see a doctor, I started anxiety medication only 2 days ago and I'm praying it helps even just a little bit! I just don't understand why its happening to me, every time someone suggests a day out even a 20 minute drive I start to panic and make excuses up, I rarely go out and my own family miss out. I started my new job only 2 weeks ago and really enjoy working there but I dread the drive to work (its only a 10 minute drive!) because this fear I'm basically going to crap any second even though I tried to go to the toilet before leaving the house. I get to work and it takes me around an hour to calm down sometimes much longer as I'm constantly trying to tell myself do not worry there is a toilet like 20 metres away! I question am I going mad here!? , if I'm into a project (my job is hands on) then it helps forget the fear, to the point i sometimes don't take rest breaks because I know I will over think it all and go back into work in that state of mind. I've had operations removing a tumour and a heart operation but would do it all again if it meant this fear would go away, eats away at me inside on a daily occurrence. And the strangest thing is that maybe 90%-95% of the time I don't actually need to use the bathroom. When I get home I get this sense of relief! even though I get this fear when someone has a bath for 45 minutes, I get panicky I need the toilet. It really is taking its toll on my mental health :( but I will take on these tips and see if I can improve it all so thank you.

[@LaurenRose.]

Hi Clarke - I'm sorry to hear you've been having such a rough and lonely time with toilet anxiety. I can hear how distressing it is and I completely understand the desperation to solve the problem!! You are not going mad - not by a long shot. It's more of a need to 'stay sane': your mind is trying to regain control by predicting the worst outcome (to save you from it) and your body is trying to regain balance, but being thrown off by the projections from your mind. I know it's hard (and incredibly confusing and counterintuitive) but the best approach I've found is to move directly towards the fear. As in, go in the car. Move further away from the toilet rather than closer to it. Gently challenge yourself. Over time, your mind will learn that the 'worst outcome' isn't as much of a likelihood as you've been assuming. Your body will be able to regain equilibrium once your mind calms a little. And then slowly but surely, you will find that the fear of the sensations leaves, and then the sensations themselves leave. It takes time, it takes practice, and it takes consciously putting yourself into the 'scary' situations, but I promise you will get a sense of peace within your body again. ❤️

[@morningmayan]

Ruined my life for years I didn't sleep hoping it will heal...

[@michaellargan3473]

Only just admitted to myself I have this, help help help 🙄

[@anandns229]

Let me ask u something... Is toilet anxiety caused by your mind or is it a Reflection of ibs....

[@rebelladitza]

Can be both

[@kalasipple3034]

It feels lonely, anyone else take Imodium in order to function in public?

[@LaurenRose.]

Hi Kala, I actually take imodium daily as part of my IBS medication! (I seem to have a gut where I can take bunches of it and still be able to poop, so taking two daily actually helps me to have regular bowel movements everyday). I think its one of those things where its designed to help, and it *can* help, but using it as a crutch can then become a double-edged sword. Similar to the use of benzo's, I guess? Ultimately I find that the toilet anxiety is actually a separate thing to whats going on physically - as in, you can be 'functioning' normally bowel-wise and still be anxious and afraid of having an accident, so the goal for me is always to be accepting of that fear and to soften towards it, because then everything is working in harmony :) Anyway, I hope knowing this helps, even a bit. You are most certainly not alone.

[@MrVinceI.0081]

I only take Imodium when traveling. I usually go to the bathroom 2-3 times before either flight or drive.