Frankie Boyle's Best Jokes on Never Mind The Buzzcocks S24E12

A compilation of the best jokes made by comedian Frankie Boyle on the BBC show 'Never Mind The Buzzcocks'. Series 24 Episode 12.

[@N.I.R.A.T.I.A.S.]

"I think you are a nice man. " "Well, watch this." Classic Frankie.

[@finnstewart1805]

“I’m sorry Mrs Corden we can’t do a termination... he’s 31” i’m dead😂💀

[@SANDSCORCHER]

Truly superb 👍🏻 The only way he could possibly have bettered it, is by adding a pregnant pause after 31, followed by “stone”.

[@BoroDanny90]

Brilliant

[@racelox]

If only James Corden was.

[@mess_noise]

It’s a joke that’s aged fantastically

[@iim4xii129]

We wish you were.

[@liamwilliams1794]

I remember when he introduced the video of guns and roses. He said “the band we all thought was cool until nirvana cane along and made them look like gay pirates” 😄

[@jambammz9908]

he's spot on though lmao

[@chilldude30]

That's just perfect

[@edcoleman85]

Shame he’s such a coward nowadays.

[@christophernicolson5086]

@@edcoleman85 Man's gotta work/ Pay the mortgage. It was like getting blackballed 5 years ago.

[@barrywallace2744]

@@jambammz9908 Except Guns and Roses are still more relevant now though.

[@sniippiggydigg]

Just by the reactions of the teams, you can tell this was the show they'd been looking forward to. Phil and Noel spend the episode in perpetual fits of laughter

[@sonny9493]

Frankie steals the show anytime he appears on anything. Always has the comics cracking up. Legend

[@ShiroKage009]

They were having the time of their lives. Michelle wanted to have fun, but it almost looked like her PR was hovering over her head lol.

[@richardpaxford5792]

"The fact that he's not a child molester once cost me a hundred quid!" 😂

[@chrisholmes8250]

That Wayne Rooney joke is pure gold

[@krisbroholm]

"I'll give you a hint Miles, it sounds fuck all like that"

[@trashleigh87]

The Michelle burn is one of the funniest things I've heard in a while.

[@flukily]

I'll I'll I'll ww

[@joeiznang]

Loooool got me good

[@christopherroberts7306]

That was lovely, perfect for this show.

[@j.c7719]

Her reaction 🤣🤣

[@PurushaDesa]

She was a remarkably good sport.

[@JoeDiaz1872]

That wayne rooney joke is absolutely tremendous still gets me in tears every time I hear it 🤣🤣🤣🤣👏👏👏

[@DanGer-re8dh]

How is it that Frankie Boyle's bleak horrorscape imagined futures still end up being better than what we actually get?

[@oneofthosevoicesyouhear9044]

Well it was either this or cities on hydraulic legs!

[@mayzerify5525]

I'd say covid us better than global waves of Chinese genocide

[@maxscardanelli6185]

I'd still take the cities on hydraulic legs! Especially now...

[@scsutton1]

I'm still waiting for the machines to take over and carry out The Great Adjustment.

[@nebraska124]

Just adore the fact that Goldie was clearly having the time of his life.

[@KegOfMeat]

Which one is Goldie?

[@iim4xii129]

@@KegOfMeat The one who looks like his rapper stage name would be Goldie.

[@sainsburmcmanus]

@@KegOfMeat the one who’s mouth is filled entirely with gold teeth

[@DeeDeeJohn17]

Goldie is a partial fraud. He marketed Rob Playford tracks, he is not a producer. Car salesman, but funny and charismatic guy

[@OnTheWax]

@@DeeDeeJohn17 what are you on about 🤣🤣

[@shewana4371]

Oh my God, I'm watching in year 2020!

[@bobsterwood]

我也是

[@tikusagram7360]

u notice he has hidden which side of his mouth he speak from with large beard

[@Driftking859]

@@bobsterwood 另外中国真的影响了2020😂

[@stephenmurphy2212]

Me too!

[@boejiden9691]

No shit Sherlock

[@TheTradge]

I actually think Frankie would have been a brilliant full time host of this show, he shares a lot in common with Mark Lamarr in many ways, has the same razor sharp tongue, quick wit and cynicism, yet doesn't take himself too seriously.

[@spartacist101]

Agreed though the BBC wouldn't have allowed it because back then he was seen as a social pariah. He was has great chemistry with the captains, PhilL Jupitus and Noel Fielding

[@TERMINATIONBLISS08]

He’d gone too far and alienated too many, on and off camera. They’d never touch him with a bargepole

[@Hoganply]

@@TERMINATIONBLISS08 Now he openly shares enough of their politics it seems he's on their whitelist.

[@vagabondwastrel2361]

@@Hoganply Yep, he rolled over to lick the boots of authoritarians.

[@jackriver1999]

The same BBC whose incumbent director general Tim Davie stood as a councillor for the Tories and is introducing measures so that right wing comedians (Jim Davidson) are given more airtime. The same BBC whose political broadcasters are all avowed Tories (Laura Kuensberg, Andrew Neil, Nick Robinson). I doubt Frankie shares any of their politics.

[@Flynn94]

“That’s not very nice…” “I’m not a very nice man.” 😂😂😂

[@benscrivener2238]

I don't think I've ever seen two people further apart on the positivity spectrum than Frankie and Michelle

[@seane6599]

Somehow, though, they are a great double act!

[@thedukeofnuts]

Oh come on... Michelle isn't that negative. :p

[@TheRexbassist]

Shouldn't really comment on people's HIV status. That's personal mate

[@Gyrbae]

They work so well together, Michelles squeky clean optimism and Frankies deadpan nihilism shouldn't work this well together but it does

[@AlastairjCarruthers]

It actually reminds me of most relationships I've been in - I'm a pathologically cynical, grumpy nihilist, but for some reason attract very bubbly, popular and surprisingly attractive women. I do usually crush their souls eventually though.

[@michaelccozens]

Frankie once did a Mock the Week "What's the question?" joke to the answer, "Sparrows, otters, and hedgehogs". It went, "What did I use as Soviet troops in my reenactment of the Battle of Stalingrad, the German forces being played by a lawnmower?". That night, Michelle, bless her innocent heart, was very much one of those sparrows.

[@eldub4124]

another answer “ what’s on the menu at a gypsy wedding” 😂

[@RenegadeShepTheSpacer]

@@eldub4124 Russell Howard's laughter at that answer made it even funnier.

[@UTubeSL]

Ah man I just read that and cried with laughter 😂😂😂

[@victorymansions]

Michelle's reaction to the 'National Fingering Association' joke is exactly what Frankie was looking for

[@ChrisCollins0928]

Saw Frankie Boyle live around 12 years ago. He had me in tears and is the only comedian I've watched and thought "I really shouldn't be laughing at this"

[@williamschubert4819]

He's an extreme example of Jimmy Carr, and actually makes jokes about specific people.

[@robboxify]

The only other one like that for me would be Jerry Sadowitz

[@stewartmcrae8007]

@@robboxify people mention this name from time to time who is he exactly

[@robboxify]

he's a scottish comedian and originally a magician, from Dundee i think. There's some footage of him on youtube@@stewartmcrae8007

[@GeoffLilley]

"Are you sure you didn't get hit for looking like a bisexual Doctor Who?" I'm DEAD.

[@ButWhatIfItIs]

Michelle's agent really stitched her up with this gig xD

[@zeitakulobusta9708]

Nah she loved it

[@doctorwhat3683]

0:24 This man’s ability to get half the panel in stitches less than a minute in is amazing.

[@astralax]

Possibly the best ever Buzzcocks episode.

[@boxculture]

0:54 that joke is hilarious. His delivery is prefect!

[@slamitch]

What is that Michelle introduction joke, please? Trying very hard, but still do not understand it properly to decypher.

[@Kulgur]

@@slamitch It sounds like he's saying that Michelle is one of the most famous and beautiful women in the world, but he then reveals that he was actually saying she was Beyonce's friend.

[@Jamie-ye7fu]

@@slamitch "as a member of destiny's child she is one of the most famous and beautiful women in the world...'s friend"

[@TequilaToothpick]

What an amazing episode.

[@shermie_65]

I playback this episode regularly. It is brilliant from start to finish. The greatest episode of anything ever

[@kipperminge9543]

We are now watching in 2020. Yet I still don't understand what Chinese he is speaking....😔😔

[@duanedibbley7846]

Piss flaps

[@DrWatson4]

“That’s not true I think you are a nice person” Frankie: Well… (metaphorically rolls up sleeves) 😂😂😂😂

[@trumpetwomble]

Frankie Boyle and Michelle Williams. If two people ever needed a road trip series!

[@DanDanCOYS]

The Wayne Rooney joke has me in tears! 😂😂

[@ace900]

I actually laughed so hard I had cramps in my stomach😂😂😂

[@DanDanCOYS]

ace900 I genuinely cried of laughter. I really didn’t expect that joke

[@ace900]

@@DanDanCOYS true!😂

[@CharlieCoops]

Same. Fucking hell Frankie was in the pocket that night

[@UTubeSL]

Same. I occasionally go back to that point and have a proper belly laugh again

[@alfiechasey3349]

''i think you're a nice man'' ''watch this'' hahahaha killed me

[@DokkaChapman]

If anyone deserved to be made full time host it was Frankie. Not only would it properly knock each guest down a peg or two but everyone would know it's just for laughs. People would tune in every week to see how far he could take it and we'd lap it up no problem lol.

[@dzonbrodi514]

they would probably have struggled to get guests after a while lol

[@Ub3rSk1llz]

if they cant bring back simon they should give frankie the job

[@M1st3rB3nn]

It's a shame Frankie's relationship with the BBC was getting bad at that time. The recipe of Simon Amstell humiliating people to his face had pretty much run its course, but Frankie's style could have worked for a regular slot. Even though his jokes were brutal he was actually quite warm with the guests and got them enjoying it

[@DokkaChapman]

@@M1st3rB3nn To be fair he has managed to get a regular gig on BBC2 doing his own show about certain topics, and they are always killer episodes. I think what's changed is that he doesn't punch down as much, instead putting his comedy squarely at a more apocalyptic turn.

[@JackMcLeodJr]

Professor Green and Michelle from Destiny's Child bounced off Frankie so well, great stuff. Michelle seems like a decent gal. Can't imagine that Beyoncé having anywhere near this level of humility.

[@seldom_bucket]

yeah i got the same vibe, she seems quite charming and warm.

[@maxmirror7260]

Frankie Boyle is fucking hilarious! 😂😂😂 one of the best comedians in the UK for sure!

[@interestedbystander196]

Poor Michelle was so shocked. I think she had fun, though...

[@4ctmam]

Yeah, she handed it quite well, clearly has a sense of humour and some distance towards herself. Good on her.

[@padmelotus]

Yeh. She was a good sport. Didn't seem like a diva at all. Good on her.

[@spinnact]

"Gee!" was such a funny response to the De La Soul joke. She seems really good-natured and funny in her own right.

[@seane6599]

Yeah, it's like she was shocked, and possibly didn't find all of it funny, but didn't kick off or anything, just played off it well.

[@barrywallace2744]

Frankie and Michelle would make a great odd couple.

[@BoutYoungAnnaLee]

I think Frankie is the funniest host they ever had. Boyle in his prime.

[@UsernameyMcUsernameFace]

Possibly second only to Bob Mortimer in my book.

[@stewartmcrae8007]

Nobody was better than Lamarr they should have just stopped making the show after he left

[@craigpardy6204]

​@@stewartmcrae8007Simon amstell was good also, no lamarr but very funny..

[@stewartmcrae8007]

@@craigpardy6204 never really liked him or saw what was funny about him he just reminded me of a kid I used to Bully at school where as Lamarr was like the cool guy down the snooker club I used to know that drove a lotus esprit and went with all the good looking birds

[@purplefood1]

The reactions of people around him are just amazing

[@therichieboy]

I just can't understand why Frankie Boyle and Michelle Williams didn't become the next celebrity couple after this.

[@RIXRADvidz]

OMafG Frankie Boyle : Prophet. in the first 30 seconds

[@Biscuitabuse]

Frankie really was ahead of the times with this one.

[@enemiestoaster]

Frankie Boyle knew about Covid.

[@matthewhowes2978]

Who knew?

[@Yellowgary]

Clairvoyant frankie

[@philbecker4676]

Lol, Francie.

[@enemiestoaster]

@@philbecker4676 Damn hahaha

[@philbecker4676]

@@enemiestoaster It's okay I think it kind of suits him.

[@RenegadeShepTheSpacer]

"Number 3: Robin Cook's corpse" LOL

[@tick999]

The Wayne Rooney one is just muah!

[@danielh8711]

That killed me

[@Darkstar263]

"She's one of the most famous and beautiful women in the world...'s friend"

[@barath4545]

Michelle was horrified at first but I think she looks back on this show as one she will never forget. And for positive reasons.

[@stewartmcrae8007]

She was on drugs or there is something seriously wrong with her it looked like she was going to throw her shoe at boyle at one point and she was acting like a moron during the songs being played

[@DJPLATINUMHD]

🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@WaynesWorld69]

"Well watch this"....... Hilarious line!

[@godzilla12325]

I remember watching this on telly, aw man i was pishing myself from start tae finish. Peak uk panel show comedy ❤

[@brabbit3389]

“Incidentally, Cheryl Cole was recently late for a gig because she couldn’t wake up the guy who presses play “

[@Actingskint]

Absolute Gold . Nobody took themselves seriously , Goldie was laughing so hard ,Phil was enjoying the banter ,& Michele was holding her own in that crowd . Frankie , as always , doesn't give a toss ,& it shows . He takes it to the edge ,& it will be a bloody sad day when he stops doing stand up .

[@ThiefOfNavarre]

Goldie was loving it 😅

[@tartanguy8714]

You get the sense Michelle had no clue what she was in for...

[@KingMuttley]

Frankie understood the assignment

[@leepshin]

Scots humour never ceases to deliver. 😁 Frankie is a Scottish treasure alongside Ricky Fulton, Stanley Baxter, Billy Connolly, Kevin Bridges, Gregor Fisher, Ford Kiernan, Karen Dunbar, Elaine C. Smith and Greg Hemphill.

[@congydave]

and Limmy

[@howler6490]

Ever listen to elaine c sing? An angel...seriously, an angel...

[@a.demifemiflapo5795]

I only recognize Billy Connolly and Kevin Bridges 🤣

[@PaulieD1984]

​@@congydave R.I.P Benny Harvey gone but not forgotten

[@congydave]

@@PaulieD1984 rip big man. always in our thoughts x

[@davidoreilly7328]

“That’s not true, I think you are a nice man” “Well watch this” 😂😂😂

[@bruce6014]

So good I had to go back to the start and watch it again

[@grf15]

Frankie's not to everyone's taste. He makes me laugh, that's all I care about. I felt sorry for Michelle. What an introduction.

[@annother3350]

She took it well...

[@Mooondoggy]

At least he set the tone haha

[@RealmDesigner]

It's so ridiculously over the top "offensive" it's hilarious. lol.

[@tomryan4556]

Poor Michelle 😅

[@arianaajbeaverhausen8175]

My bro works installing internet and once went to a flat in Edinburgh and Frankie was there, he was apparently visiting a pal here. My bro said he was, and I quote, "sound as fück!" 😄 Laid back and down to earth, what a national treasure! 🥰❤🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

[@Haggis.Supper]

One of the greatest 30 minutes of TV

[@stevenlawson8791]

I lived 2 doors down from Frankie before he made money and moved the Glasgows west ( the nice part of Glasgow lol ) and he is such a nice man! To chat to he was funny but not naturally hysterical! His jokes are well written and he plays his character so well people think that’s how he is! He makes comedy look easy He deserves his success! Shame the lack of our freedom of speech has had him put off all major networks and he only performs in comedy clubs or BBC online New world order, however that has been shown on tv after a few online seasons as it was popular! Well done man Hope I meet you again

[@jumhed994]

He's scared of flying, which means he can't gig abroad either.

[@ml6cut463]

What bit of Glasgow was he from m8?

[@stewartmcrae8007]

There is a nice part of Glasgow are you sure about that

[@Jamal-jv8yc]

Frankie should present the oscars

[@IDDQDSound]

What producer would have Frankie on as a host and then continue to make the show without him? I laughed more at this episode than the entirety of the rest of NMTB combined.

[@ShiroKage009]

Michelle: That's not true I think you are a nice man. Frankie: Well watch this! Fucking hell that was brilliant.

[@jockmackay9582]

I have a criminal record for doing exactly what Frankie does in the opening clip

[@tick999]

Search for 'Spanish basketball team in China'

[@UnChannelDuVulpineX]

@Ru paul What's wrong with race based humour? browns have been telling anti-White jokes for ages. The "kill whitey" one was particularly telling.

[@wthwasthat8884]

I'll take "sh!t that isn't true" for 500 please. Also a bonus of "I'm a victim mentality" for 1000 please.

[@101yayo]

You should be happy that you are still alive.

[@myelawwud2951]

The "justice system" is a joke.

[@scottj8243]

Frankie, one of the best to do it.

[@skyway100]

so much better than the recent run bring back frankie on buzzcocks

[@brenkelly1474]

Wayne Rooney gag....every time..every single time...😂😂😂😂😂

[@khasab6124]

They should never have cancelled this show

[@AtenRa]

They're bringing it back in 2021, though considering the TV climate I highly doubt it'll be this raw ever again.

[@khasab6124]

@@AtenRa where did you hear that'?

[@khasab6124]

@@AtenRa AH being revived by Sky

[@MSimmyGolf]

“Well watch this”

[@malcolmtucker8042]

That’s amazing, thanks!

[@FasterThanSnakes]

Holy shit Frankie was pretty much spot on with that 2020 "gag"

[@chiefcheeser]

That Wayne Rooney joke is just so fucking funny.

[@TheManorBeast]

Jesus Christ that Wayne Rooney joke had me wheezing

[@Hellndegenerates]

That first joke gets me everytime.

[@JD_13]

Opening joke resonates a lot more now.

[@simonesalvatore9345]

I’m watching this on Dave+1 in the year 2020 and I can confirm that the Chinese have not taken over.

[@cantthinkofanythingwitty]

Year's not over yet

[@torquetheprisoner]

there working on Australia first

[@chorusofoddities]

@@torquetheprisoner they're

[@torquetheprisoner]

@@chorusofoddities fucking hell people are dieing and your worried aboot a bet of gromer ane slukom

[@chorusofoddities]

@@torquetheprisoner I guess you are too illiterate to have read the other comments that say 'covid-19?🤣' and that China is supposedly taking over Australia

[@timberlande774]

I think I watch this about 3 times a day

[@WigsyDoesSimRacing]

I’m watching this in 2020.

[@TonyEnglandUK]

Thank goodness you're not watching it in 2028, you wouldn't believe what's going on here.

[@Sem5626]

chin ching chaaa waaaaahh

[@rbw7556]

Everyone is this was released a month ago

[@duanedibbley7846]

What the fuck is going on here then

[@oneofthosevoicesyouhear9044]

I would love to see the uncut version of this

[@alanheavey6005]

Frankie, on form is fookin hilarious.

[@MayorofDipshittery-lq7if]

Always a joy Frankie 😂😂

[@jeffbezos1639]

Unironically watching this in 2020 lmao

[@themuslimmountainbiker]

Introducing Michelle Williams from Destiny's Child like that was priceless 😂😂😂

[@ben6993]

I really wanna see the uncut version 😂

[@sbc1t]

loved that.

[@vasp99]

I miss this show !

[@sylviodante619]

Fantastic

[@socialdistaansingh9438]

Love frankie 😂😂

[@porthibs]

Brilliant 👏😂

[@AKidWithNoAttitude]

If you're watching in 2020. Well that caught me by surprise.

[@wolvie90]

"Get used to it bitch" And that's tame for Frankie Boyle.

[@arfnore]

The eyes Michelle gives Goldie at 4.35 suggests an after show horizontal jam session. With Frankie sitting in the corners shouting encouraging obscenities while flaying a lamb!

[@bobsmith1861]

Oh my god I'm watching this in 2021!!!!

[@SANDSCORCHER]

In an ideal world, the program would return, hosted exclusively by Frankie.

[@stewartmcrae8007]

in a ideal world they would get all of these reality tv wankers in the same room and have Lamarr roll a hand grenade in

[@user-fl3sr2kh5c]

4:57 😂 I absolutely love this joke and Michelle’s response 😅 Thought this was a wholesome family show. To be fair it normally is…..

[@wessexheathen5708]

Watching in 2021!!

[@breenr2020]

The Wayne Rooney joke was incredible 😂

[@danmayberry1185]

"That's not true - I think you are a nice man." "Well watch this .."

[@jewferigno6920]

Professor Green sticking up for dappy makes him a huge muppet

[@kylewilliams5761]

The Wayne Rooney one gave me a laugh that I haven't had since Covid. !!

[@markc266]

I’d love to see the unedited recording of this episode

[@tedthecommenter5364]

''her surname keeping them safe during the waves of chinese genocide''

[@luckyjim37]

his intros are the best

[@cjwhiterabbit1]

My new year wish is that Frankie Boyle gets to host the resurrected Blankety Blank....online petition anyone ?