Further Reasons for waking up The JW FOG - Part 3 - Guilt

[@rachelschillert926]

Thanyou Thankyou and Thankyou. I'm from Australia. I've just found you both and loved listening to what you have said.Ive been disfellowshiped twice.Im still worried and feel sick just about everything. Sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy. I'm 47 and have a lovely son who is 24.Thankyou for your videos ,it is helping me.😘

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Glad to know that we have helped in some small way. It is traumatic being dealt with by the JW system - just remember that you do not need to submit to them or fear them. Take control of your life and break free from their fear & doom & gloom. Life is short - make the most of it! All the best to you and your son.

[@Jeron_Benton]

I love Australia! Been there heaps of times, I hope you and your son are well and glad your fully awake

[@jah97302]

Almost all of my teen years were burdened with guilt about my choices. I loved sports. Sports = bad. I loved having friends. Non-JW friends = bad. Polio shots = bad. Going to movies = bad. Hair style = probably bad. In other words, just about everything I did that was not going to meetings or going door to door "placing" literature was "being weak and worldly." This couple is right on the money.

[@kirstenornelas881]

Then when I was a kid vaccines were accepted. Smh oh, trust they picked a million other things to make us feel bad about ourselves for though. I do wonder though how that made parents who lost their children or family who lost any member for that matter to a preventable disease feel after they changed the rules to day oh right go ahead and get vaccinated now. It is sick how they claim they are never changing, the Bible is never changing ect, yet, the laws, or regulations I guess I should say, change frequently and those who are left in the wake of the change having lost their loved ones because the previous law/rule was different and are expected to just take the new light in stride. It is sick

[@MeekEarth700]

No polio shots a surprise; how did they square that with coerced Covid jabs?

[@SpiderDiscord]

The videos gets better and better. Thanks for sharing your perspectives!

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Thanks!

[@eyeswideopen8046]

Just found your channel and I love it! I've been faded for 4 years, the first 2 were the worst, waking up. This video had many triggers for me, but it was good to remember how grateful I am to be out! Thank you for making these videos! It totally validates all the feelings of guilt I used to have.

[@Nica-Ra-Wata]

Many find a huge rabbit HOLE. Lies, this world is 100% lies. Tetragrammaton is Egyptian meaning FOUR LETTERS of aton atum adam electron and the SUN or jehovah is atum in Greek. Israel is ISIS AMUNRA ELOHIM PARIS is para ISIS AMUNRA is amen RA ELOHIM is gods plural Psalms is lamps Jacob saw god and named that place penial as in the penial gland or 3rd eye...DMT poped eye or popeye

[@elainebraindrain3174]

I just found your channel referenced from a post on Reddit. It's encouraging for me to see the two of you escaping together and enjoying your life. Like you I'm a long timer waking up about a year-and-a-half ago. I didn't fare so well I lost my marriage my home and all my friends. Blessings to you both wishing you the best life ever 😘🌷

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Sorry to hear that you lost so much. Hope that life gets so much better for you in future.

[@krissykatportal]

I'm right there with u girl. This religion ruins lives. Killed my baby brother :/

[@elainebraindrain3174]

@@krissykatportal my condolences 😢

[@krissykatportal]

@@elainebraindrain3174 where r u from?

[@elainebraindrain3174]

@@krissykatportal southern California and you?

[@judyarellano6196]

Thank you for sharing your testimony. It’s extremely helpful for those of us struggling with Watchtower PTSD

[@4flyguyeli]

I love your videos! Everything you say is everything I felt and experienced exactly. I hope you both continue to make videos. Your videos are cathartic and entertaining. Thank you!

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Thanks for your kind comments. We try to keep it real and call it as we experienced it.

[@InfiniteGoddess]

Interesting channel. I've been through all of that and more! Guilt, shame and fear was how I was raised in this arena. No matter what I did, it was never enough. I choose a baptized 'brother' and we never had a minute alone to talk. Because you know, we are so sinful and the urges will override your power of reason and you will sin. I felt sorry for the chaperones, it was like your every move is accounted for. When my husband at the time, didn't attend meetings, somehow it was my fault, and I needed to be the example. Wait, what? Shouldn't he be taking the lead? I could go on for hours about how this guilt, shame and fear molded me. Four years ago, I decided to not go back. To realize that I'm a very good and nice person is so freeing and I don't have to feel so unworthy.

[@taaadaaa5256]

It takes a ***Strong Mind and Thick Skin*** to walk away from the JW Watchtower Demon

[@kittylove2975]

The JW literature's apocalyptic pictures were also terrifying as to your future if you didn't follow the Organizations rules. Thank you for your channel, experience, knowledge, and voice.

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Aka Perez - yes, so much fear is used to control people. The guilt is even worse because the person is tormenting themself.

[@dannycasey8261]

Thank y'all so much. Every channel helps get the word out! Be blessed

[@angiespangle9773]

So true my lovelies.

[@deeplo22]

Love your accent!! You both are adorable. Thanks for making these videos. The more ExJdubs do that the more JWs see that 'Apostates' are no monsters or lying people. I actually was never a JW but I am interested in that since more than 10 years, because I know a JW who is working at bethel in NY. He is such a nice person and I hope so much that he will wake up too some day. Greetings from Germany! :-)

[@bubblestar2314]

Hello Paul and Joy! Funny I haven't found you earlier. I just subbed today. I've been trying to catch up on watching your video on TV using Roku. Say! I am a born in JW. Got baptized at 14 in 1962. After all those years of assemblies, meetings, mid week and weekend service, etc, etc, I finally "woke up" in 1997 and officially left (after partaking in a KH) in 1998. The seventies having children was highly frowned upon just as back in the early fourtys when our parents were looked down upon for marrying. So to prove their trust and faithfulness in God, they moved into a tent which was set up in the back yard of an elderly JW lady. So they full time pioneered for 7 whole years (no car, no job) relying upon handouts and help from the fellow JW. Till Mom got pregnant with me and my sister. (twins) So dad had to move out of the tent find a job and built a small unfinished house too small for a family. (one bedroom and an out house in the back yard. I remember the 8 day assemblies sitting outdoors on bleachers. Every meeting day we had to take naps which we greatly hated. And we were tortured with metal curling rods having to undergo regular permanents which stank and burned our head, let alone pulling our hair. Anyway..... Teachings were becoming questionable for me. We went through the 975 failure. This didn't cause me to start to question for our congregation did not see any leave over it. What really set in my mind was the WT 1979 lesson we sat in on Sunday and it was telling us that Jesus is not the Mediator for the "other sheep". Not one person questioned it and you could have heard a pin drop. It did not set well with me but not enough to begin to heavily question and examine the WT History, etc. The 1914 generation was dropped..... The studies were limited to 6 mos for there wasn't enough time. We were being taught that churches were drying up while I passed many churches whose parking lots were loaded, but our kingdom hall attendance was down. We were taught that we were one tick from the dooms day clock striking midnight, and that we were to see a great increase of members, yet our halls were not growing at all. Hardly any new comers. So many thing were building up which was causing me to slow down and to wonder what was going on. In the ninety's we got a computer. Our son found older WT quotes and teachings and shared them with me. Then I could finally see that the WT Org is nothing but just another of those "false religions" that they look down upon because of false doctrine. It was so shocking that some of the WT false doctrines are even WORSE! Than some of those in "Christendom". We had been lied to and our JW parents and relatives were robbed of their inheritance in Christ. They are all dead now. Hopefully Yahweh and Christ will be merciful. I hope that your video will help to open the minds of many JW who don't yet realize that they are not following Christ, but the Governing Body of men who they obey. (Not listening fully to Christ but are actually followers of men. It took me two long years in helping my twin sister to open her eyes to what the WT Org truly is. We have a younger brother who is still trapped in it. (Both physically blind and spiritually blind) At least he doesn't totally shun us. My husband just stopped going to meetings when I did, but he has actually never been much interested in the Bible or spiritual things. I married him when I was 16 and he was 20 .... plodding along in the Watchtower Org. His sister (only sibling) has been totally shunning us now for a year. (because she could see that he is not interested in going back to the WT Org. His parents are now dead too. His JW aunt, uncle, and JW mom. None of them partook nor considered themselves to be members of Christ. So sad!

[@morningglory9288]

I just texted a long message to my JW friend on how I've left the organisation. I gave her a few reasons what I found wrong with it, but I also directed her attention to Jesus. I quoted many many scriptures how we're all supposed to bow down and worship him. Philippians 2:8-11; and he is our saviour Ephesians 2:8,9. But the one thing I made a point of to her was the true implication of John 10:16. JW's believe this to mean the anointed and the great crowd of other sheep that form one group under the one shepherd. I directed her to Epesians 2:11-22 quoting from the New Living Translation that the true implication of that verse means the Jews and the Gentiles. She hasn't replied me, in fact I think shes cut me off, but at least I tried and perhaps given her something to think about.

[@jaellandrie6877]

I finally celebrated my birthday at 40 years old and it was wonderful! Also, there was no way I wasn't going to celebrate my daughter's birthday ever since she was born.

[@reemCGR]

happy 40th birthday!! =D May you have many more! :P

[@jeffeeeeeee]

I only read this a year after your 40th..... Happy 41st Birthday 👍😁

[@jerryoconnor309]

Ah yes the guilt, you can never do enough for watchtower, its a hamster wheel that just gets faster.

[@bigblockjdam2750]

FINALLY SOME KIWIS... HELLO SISTER AND BROTHER FROM OTHER MOTHERS.. AWESOME TO SEE YOU HAVE ARISEN WHILE YOU STILL HAVE TIME TO ENJOY THE FINER THINGS IN LIFE.. .ONE THING I MISS IS GETTING TOGETHER WITH A WHOLE BUNCH FOR SUNDAY LUNCH OR BBQ DINNERS AND CHEWING THE CUD.. DIWCUSSING THINGS WE DONT QUITE GET THE POINT..I USE TO DO THAT WITH MY PARENTS THAT WERE BOTH IN ..BUT THEY HAVE GONE TWO YEARS AGO....BUT IF YOU WOULD BE KEEN IT WOULD BE GREAT..I FIND MOST PEOPLE AREN'T INTO TALKING ABOUT THIS MUCH.. DO YOU STILL BELIEVE IN THE FATHER AND SON...?

[@virginialecroy7729]

Just wonerderful! Please let us know about your veiws on shunning! I think this is one of cruelest practise of all! I have subscribed and think you are a special couple!💖

[@pauljoyquilter359]

We have done a video about shunning, so check it out for our views on this cruel and inhuman control mechanism.

[@paulomartins7124]

PAULO==BRAZIL===Very well presented.Keep it up!!

[@ronslaughterandalice1018]

I have searched through my very limited vocabulary for one word to sum up the WT ,,,,,,,,Ruthless . The last conversation I had with the elder I studied with as he visited me because I stopped going to meetings, I simply said I am tired of going to meetings and being constantly told how bad I am. His reply was OH that is for the new ones coming in. He left and I have never seen him sense.

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Yes, I agree with you totally. They are ruthless bullies.

[@dannycasey8261]

I subbed and enjoy y'all's channel. Thank y'all

[@miekeborkent168]

first bk that i read was crisis of conscience, raymond franz. i remember him speaking as a governing body member in the 60s. very interesting bk. still published today.

[@Bamboozled607]

You guys are my musical soul mates! 🤩

[@christinescott5910]

Hi Paul& Joy, I have just been introduced to your Chanel, & want you to know how much I appreciate you telling your story, it is really encouraging when you listen to others who have "woken up". We all are on the same page, our stories are so similar ,also our questions that started the process of our waking up!! I was disfellowshiped earlier this year(2019) although I only found out via a third person a week after it was announced at the Kingdom Hall!!. If you have a mind to, you can look up Disfellowshiping of faithful Christine. Put out by Anna Marina, it's hard to believe that we were so taken in for so long isn't it . I am 80yrs old and was baptised in 1960, so like you I did not sign up to an Organisation. But that did not count when the Elders made it their business to get rid of me as they saw me as an Apostate 🙀Lots of love to you both ,and I look forward to more of your vidiosxxxx

[@suchenliao2517]

Excellent video!! Spot on points thank you Paul and Joy .👏

[@willieb6307]

Glad you made it out of that BORG

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Thanks - we are so happy to be out of that mess of a cult.

[@carissarea6442]

And this guilt just leads back to fear because if we don’t tell and ANYONE finds out we will be disfellowshipped! Then we’re right back to obligation! Ridiculousness! I had a question when my child was getting married in the KH. I innocently asked if there would be an exchanging of wedding rings during the ceremony. Yes was the answer. So I asked why it’s practiced because it comes from paganism and exchanging rings is not scriptural. I was told I was getting nit picky and the rumor was started that I didn’t really like our new family member and tried to ruin their day. I also know of a young couple who wanted to get engaged but the young man couldn’t afford the ring the young ladies parents expected her to have and they broke up. Materialism. It’s rampant in the cult!

[@reonbarrett5546]

feel for you as a JW wish your best . we will all fined out in the end haha the end

[@jeffeeeeeee]

Ahhh the freedom of growing a beard upon awakening 👍

[@gforce9132]

Thank you

[@LovinLife-pv7op]

I remember hearing that it took 7,000 to recruit one person who actually gets baptized, but I don't remember if that was 7,000 hours or 7,000 presentations.

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Lovin'Life2016 - it was 7000 hours of witnessing.

[@shaonstuart5748]

I feel as a kiwi ex jw I'm so alone. Would love to meet other ex JW in NZ

[@SherylDixon]

Well done for waking up. Sending love all the way from the UK. I woke up on my own with all my relatives still in. I know what it's like to feel alone but be comforted that there is a growing community of us here for support. It's great to be rid of the burdensome manmade obligations and now living my best life! I am sure there are many near you but feel free to reach out if you ever want to chat.

[@pauljoyquilter359]

There are many groups of Ex JWs in NZ and they have regular meetups and also have support and therapy to assist those who are recovering. PM me for details.

[@shaonstuart5748]

@@SherylDixon Thank you for those kind words

[@robynphillips-nb3ik]

Wishing you all the best. Im a kiwi living in australia. Been out well over 35 yrs now. Used to go to the Wellsford congregation.

[@debbieforsyth2015]

❤️ 🙏

[@lindaanderson1366]

NO NEED TO WAKE UP ANY MORE, IT'S THE "TOP" ONES THATS TELLING THEM WHAT TO DO, THEY'RE JUST FOLLOWING WHAT THEIR TOLD !!!

[@krissykatportal]

I love u guys! Will u be my parents????💕 New sub

[@RitaMalikfour]

I read the first chapter of job, his children all celebrated their birthdays, it’s so clear, the words, to each their own day, was used, job made sacrafises to Jehovah after each party to ask God forgiveness incase one of them may have sinned in some way, I really never understand, it shows that jobs children each had their day, then job making animal scrafices to God asking an incase forgiveness,?? I got all confirmation this was his kids birthday parties but then job makes animal sacrifices , there is something g for a good bible interpreter . I just can’t do it thecway they say and let the bible speak for itself, I’m trying, I need to pray more, the brainwashing worked so well but that was Satan , now that I’m aware , it creeps me out, that I was one of those zombies, I love and stay cease to God and his son, i pray, and I pray, I prayed for help to understand what I was capable, sort of lost in time, each day I pray I wake up a ir more, I find the meeting shutdowns. Some breathing space, stand back and look at the forest for the trees

[@annabizaro-doo-dah]

Oh music was my absolute Bain I was wracked with guilt for my album collection and going to gigs. My taste is very eclectic but I couldn't always show the most some music for the most absurd reasons. Oftentimes it was around silly myths like that silly backwards satanic stuff. Even the classical music I loved was "marshal"!!

[@pauljoyquilter359]

I know the feeling. I have very varied tastes, and a collection of 1000's of vinyl, an equally large CD collection and a 2Tb server that is almost full. Just went to the Snow Patrol concert here in NZ and a few months ago to Bryan Ferry, but love almost all music except opera and country. Check out an Italian band named Nidi Darac, a German band named City and a US band named Sinkane...

[@natc8540]

Hey did you hear on the news, they found a 9,000 year old city in Israel.

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Nat C - yes, we heard that news and we also have a ton of scientific and archaeological data that shows humans are far older than 10,000 years old. All of this shows that the Watchtower timeline is total BS - which throws every prediction and “truth” that they loudly proclaim into doubt.

[@joellebrowne5714]

Hi there.

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Hi!

[@kittynelson3345]

Y'all like great music!!

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Kitty Nelson - we certainly do! It’s been my job for the past 47 years - selling Hi-Fi gear so that people can enjoy their music more.

[@Sportliveonline]

jesus nether used such fear on people

[@RitaMalikfour]

What happened to grace, and Jesus said his load was light, this isn’t what Jesus wanted? I still believe after peeling back the covers, I kept praying, I got to find my way to the real world, I follow Jesus, and oh nooo he might have a beard, or speak to a lost soul

[@ziggylaurie2268]

Jehovah is the God of greed. He wants it all. Nothing is good enough!

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Yes, for a God who created everything he certainly needs a lot of cash!

[@miekeborkent168]

another one to look at for you is the Henrietta M Riley trust that the ORG was left in her will dedicated all her worldly goods to the ORG, and she was wealthy!by the way Antoinette here! Another question is how many of the governing body members are freemasons? They , the ORG worship baal one of the gods of the hebrews/ caananites they worshipped many gods but one of their favourites were the god / jahbulon/ jehovah/ baal the list is endless but they required sacrifice, children were high on the menu. their is a clip with USA naval sailors doing their song /chant on jehovah. youtube/ days of Elijah_ US marines w/lyrics.

[@apostababelindajames7461]

7:06 Wearing a bracelet around the ankle. Wow! I had no idea that wearing anklets is a sign of being a harlot. Paul, you were an elder, why didn't you warn Joy not to wear such scandalous jewelry!? 😏🙂😊😁😂😁😊🙂 I'm just kidding. I have found that member's will *share their own opinions* as if it's been brought up as a rule in the past that they find the need to remind others about. Let's not forget about those need not know unwritten rules. Those are the best because these are the rules that are on a need to know basis. One isn't informed of the rule untill one broke the rule. 🙄

[@pauljoyquilter359]

ApostaBabe Linda James - at the time I was just a lowly MS - and didn’t get appointed because I was not “presiding in a fine manner” - in other words my wife had a mind of her own and was a feisty redhead!

[@apostababelindajames7461]

@@pauljoyquilter359 I stand corrected, thank you for explaining that you were only a ministerial servant at the time. The fact that your wife was a red headed feisty woman with a mind of her own makes me smile.

[@dantoinettetaylor1663]

In my country wearing an anklet (ankle bracelet) by women is frowned upon because of this same belief that harlots wear them so of course JWs look down the practice

[@apostababelindajames7461]

@@dantoinettetaylor1663 That's fascinating to hear. Thank you.

[@darrengreen9273]

And they brainwash their members to believe it's a loving provision.

[@bernadettekelly2772]

I love Fleetwood mac brilliant Band !

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Always been a big fan of them. Sad to see one of the founding members, Peter Green, die recently.

[@brendangoodbrand2597]

Tell me lies sweet little lies 😂

[@TheVelvetteButterfly]

I’m going to respectfully disagree with your comment about someone’s choice of dress denoting their character. Would you question the character of your attorney if he showed up on court to represent you wearing saggy pants showing his underwear? Would you question the character of your doctor if she entered the exam room in spike heels, a mini mini skirt and a low cut sheer blouse? Someone’s choice of dress definitely denotes who they are. That’s why everyone doesn’t wear a uniform because we DO have choices. Personally my choice of dress has changed over the years. Dressing for attention was my choice when I was seeking to fill myself with anything that glorified ME!!! Today I’m filled and have no need to seek that.

[@pauljoyquilter359]

We were saying that your choice of fashion does not denote your character, but that the view of the JW religion was that it did. I think you have taken the opposite of what we were actually saying. We were contrasting the narrow JW view with our views of freedom of choice.

[@TheVelvetteButterfly]

@@pauljoyquilter359 My apologies, I misunderstood your view. Thank you for clarification. Thank you for sharing your story. I hope it helps others come out. I do enjoy your videos and am fascinated with the New Zealand accent. There are words you pronounce I get a little laugh out of but I’ve been told I have a slight accent... I don’t hear it but apparently others do.

[@bobherron4573]

Wheres the Love

[@miekeborkent168]

did you know about their investments?

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Yes, I found that out around 4 years ago when I woke up to their lies and started doing in-depth research. I have files full of incriminating data that is widely available if you just do some Google searches and check out their legally required filings. There is a lot of info available through the Charities Commission in NZ too... like all the money they have sent off overseas from sales of local properties which were funded by donations and volunteer labour.

[@georgecoons6872]

now if you have a baby you get disfellowshiped.

[@nathancooper1]

Why do you use scriptures in your videos? I thought you have left the JW church?

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Because many of the people who we are trying to help recover from the cult still believe in the Bible & so it helps them relate to what we mean.

[@miekeborkent168]

hi there you 2, love the show! The Guardian newspaper of the UK ,mon 15 oct 2001. about the UN and the ORG.article by stephen Bates.Newshub Amy Parsons_King. silent lambs: child sexual abuse and the jehovas witnesses: 23/07/2018

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Hi Mieke, Yes the Silent Lambs Doco by Amy was the first bit of activism that we took part in. She spent a whole day at our place and got a lot of footage, only a small part of which was used in the film. It was featured on national Radio as well and we have more things happening over the next few months which will increase the exposure of harmful JW policies. Thanks for the positive vibes!

[@miekeborkent168]

@@pauljoyquilter359 you are wellcome!

[@bernadettekelly2772]

Good morning Paul and Joy ! I agree with a lot of what you say . But I am disappointed you no.longer believe there is a loving God! Please dont let pharisees to destroy your faith !

[@pauljoyquilter359]

We are very happy with our life, thinking and position. Reality has replaced fantasy. Nobody has destroyed anything - we just replaced blind faith based on fear of invisible entities with evidence based thinking.

[@maranatha8524]

You both have anger and I’d even say, hate in your hearts - why not just leave it alone and go live your lives in peace - just leave it alone - I suppose your now both going to the Catholic Church

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Rick Edwards - you are dead wrong - we have zero hate for JWs - they are misled by the GB. We see all religions as control mechanisms now and are totally non religious humanists. Peace!

[@jah97302]

Rick Edwards - boy are you on the wrong channel. There is no hate there at all. Just facts and personal experiences. You are the one exhibiting poor judgment and disdain for sincere people who are sharing part of their lives with you. Or maybe you just got up on the wrong side of the bed that morning and your head hasn't cleared.

[@maranatha8524]

John Hoyle Sir - I feel an apology is in order - I am sorry - I think I did get out of bed on the wrong side. I watched your video and my initial thought was what a nice couple - and then I listened to your story and thought ‘why’. What was your part in the whole saga - there’s always two sides of the story. It’s never Jehovah’s fault - and I very well know that what you say about the organisation has merit - but if we cannot worship our God with the JW ‘s - then who will our fellowship be with - people as you know don’t even use and acknowledge God’s name - Jesus spoke about fellowship- we’re do we go? - my wife and I are both ‘inactive’ at the moment and are in conflict- so again I’m very sorry for my comments that may have upset you both - I hope you can forgive- at one time you both would have been my brother and sister - and we would have had a ‘love’ for each other. If I’m honest - I too am at a loss

[@pauljoyquilter359]

Rick Edwards - we certainly feel warmth towards all those who are searching for answers, peace and freedom. We just hosted a couple this weekend. They were JWs till last year. He was an elder and had very similar questions to what we had. He has different ideas from us, and that is fine. We love them for who they are, not what they believe. We do not see a need to associate with any religious group, as we are far happier without this control mechanism in our lives. We will explore further issues in future videos and hope you will find them positive and helpful. Peace!