George Discusses Getting Catfished, Max Address Hate Comments and More!

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Welcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.
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[@AnIrishMan500]

Thank you so much for giving Callum a microphone.

[@Double.D.Tootss]

We need a Cal cam

[@lucyloo2874]

i genuinely feel so bad for george HOW DARE YOU CATFISH HIM!

[@dnjfdbgfothjnt]

The riff of was so unexpected but i need so many more of them please guys 😔

[@rad8373]

I LOVE IT

[@rubylocker801]

just two lovely ladies having a chit chat

[@nishavarma78]

the British Jake and and Johnnie

[@amymariee]

the riff off had me in tears 😭😭

[@zz-ih5xe]

'pink one looks tub' is wild looool

[@lisamassau440]

that pitch perfect bit was actually so funny would not have suspected that george knew so much about it

[@han.ridl3y]

thank you so so much for giving producer/manager man a microphone

[@duckgamer9449]

You both should go on bach and Arthur's podcast and let them explain the universe to you guys

[@Djm8520]

George was just on with them.

[@Alicelauren890]

Looking gorgeous as always Max xxx

[@m1scha]

so true

[@Blue83149]

this needs to be said more often!!

[@gemma.bgtgefrdwxwe]

please get Italian Bach on the pod 🙏

[@tamsindave]

YES PLEASE PLEASE!!

[@shannnnn537]

Meant to be in the office in my professional job but I'm crying laughing at max and George doing a riff off 😢

[@ilhaamelmi831]

it’s so fun hearing max tell george new things and vice versa bc i understand them both😭

[@emmaslifeonfilm]

super random but the fact that George doesn't have a phone case makes me so uncomfortable

[@minecraftnerd2175]

Idk why that's so weird whenever I take out my phone my friends scream at me to get a phone case

[@tarrarowan5214]

I’m enjoying hearing more about George bb at the start

[@ida.13]

best part of my week is a thursday and sunday for bach & arthur and the useless hotline xoxo ❤

[@luigispasta]

perfect timing! just about to start my essay and now i have to sit and watch this for the next hour and 43 minutes 🙄 (thank you 😭🙏)

[@TheLashBarbieUK]

Is it just me or Is Max’s hairline perfect??? Like Max there is NOTHING wrong with it! 😅

[@sofiaaaxo]

GUYS I will definitely need a tour vlog!!! Pleaseeee I want Bts content and what you do before the shows, rituals etc.👏🏻

[@degeniia]

That is exactly why I don't do dating apps, too many creeps. So weird

[@minecraftnerd2175]

Ik when max mentioned them possibly turning up just to watch him wait it genuinely gave me the shivers. The thought of that genuinely scares me so bad

[@cevdalinka]

⁠@@minecraftnerd2175 And the fact that it was someone involved in the industry!! Such a weird situation

[@degeniia]

@@minecraftnerd2175 Exactly! Idk how they can talk so calmly about it I would genuinely be freaking out lol

[@minecraftnerd2175]

Im irish and max thinking belfast is in Scotland is actually killing me. In a bad way. But george knowing the difference between northern ireland and the republic of is nice.

[@isabella_z.j]

i'm sorry that happened to you George :(

[@iqrafatima6898]

Usually, i listen to podcasts to get me to sleep and i put on this one and got woken up by max screaming "SINCE YOU'VE BEEN GOOOOOOONE". My ears almost died but i loved it.

[@korina-ellap3867]

I love this comment section bit please do it again!

[@mercc.292]

Max looks like he smells like baby powder 👀....George can u confirm?

[@Megan_2554]

omg i listen to this podcast like when im going to sleep and sometimes its too funny it keeps me up like im literally just lying there wheezing!! im so glad i decided to watch this one though cause im not sure id be able to just lie there through the riff off lmaoo (also max i love you and george both equally!! i dont understand how people could have a favourite!)

[@AHunt2024]

the riff off had me snort laughing accidentally on the bus. i can never get the bus again.

[@Blue83149]

the shade of red i have gone from laughing so much is hilarious!

[@arthurchan1993]

When I heard George's story, my first thought was whether they were there to find out where he lives by following him when he left.

[@han.ridl3y]

If you go to coachella go to week 2- there's all the influences and people posing for pictures and stuff often on the first week. Week 2 tends to be when all the actual fans go and the crowds are a lot better

[@Tay-nn7ff]

The riff of was the highlight of this pod 😂❤️

[@liajordann]

CALLUM HAS A MIC TY

[@bronwyn.mj03]

The sheer panic on max’s face when George just starts singing do, dddd do, during the riff.

[@mr.porridge4898]

Excuse me but... GEORGE YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL. First you get EGGS in your pots and on the roof, second you get CATFISHED and third someone makes a ig profile that it's a SHRINE to your persona?! You are clearly being followed/Stalked by some kind of FOXY DEMON. You need to be careful before they get your soul. Also, love the very short shorts, looking like a whole meal with sides. Max, you're proper fit too Xx

[@gracemarsh1353]

Max, your doppelgänger (James Charles) got vocal lessons and now sounds surprisingly good, so don’t lose hope king, I’m sure someone somewhere could help you 🫶

[@johnking5174]

George, you did a great Belfast accent. Perfect.

[@beebus_]

callum is finally heard🙏🙏

[@georgie0020]

max is a gorgeous human being and we should tell him more often😘😘

[@sab29]

Yayyy we can hear callum ❤

[@elliembh1726]

George, Arthur and Andrew all look similar because they've got the same beard/stubble and hair, that's about it

[@minecraftnerd2175]

Dont worry george we also had the friendship bench. And yes no one used it because the only thing worse than being lonely is being shoved into a game where everyone hates you and doesnt want you to be there

[@queencupcakke]

To be fair on the thumbnail for the Andrew episode, I thought it was Arthur at first

[@sophiecanner1667]

The dangly bits actually your uvula. Crazy you talk about tonsillitis though as I’ve got that right now :(

[@mriarnkin]

nearly spat out my coffee when my comment came up

[@arcticwerewolf2]

I really want them to just do a music episode. Music quiz, riff offs, maybe some instrument playing? They could make it hella fun :0

[@camhusmj38]

There’s no way Max thinks Belfast is in Scotland. 🤦‍♂️

[@AnIrishMan500]

🤭

[@jamie144]

I am on the bus then max and George start singing and trying to keep my laugher in but I can't 😂😂😂

[@jeffies2821]

Excellent episode. So glad the podcast is continuing. Was worried with Max getting a new management company he might leave the podcast

[@srhtjuhh9134]

Maddening Max💖💖

[@legster983]

Omg max is not fat , I don’t understand all the hullabaloo? Xx max is a very handsome man

[@ghostingclay]

WAS NOT EXPECTING TO SEE MY COMMENT THERE LMAO love u max ur just not very good at singing ❤ actually i take that back why did he start singing im gonna cry

[@ameliamasters4836]

Max I'm genuinely serious WHERE did you get your Turtwig plush ?! I love him

[@m1scha]

i’ve decided i’m okay with george not being real

[@Double.D.Tootss]

Double length episode I'm obsessed

[@lainalouisa7806]

I am dying that my comment was in this LOOL. Love to both and hope to see the pineapple cream in szn 2 babyyyyyy x

[@hereitszara1497]

is george on a sugar rush or something this episode hahah

[@torackplays]

George coming in with Darude Sandstorm was so straight white male coded

[@shannnnn537]

Love you max ❤

[@marianamason1471]

Stroganoff Clarke 🤣🤣🤣

[@kayleighelizabeth24]

Thank you for giving Callum a mic guys xx

[@ohtmealeo]

as an irish individual i am deeply offended by max's lack of geographical skills 😞

[@itsmelola6963]

Our school had the friendship stop but nobody used it

[@deirbhilewalsh8151]

It’s so cute him laughing about a fox putting an egg on a roof

[@RagingGamingHD1]

Can’t wait to get my “teckets” from the link in description

[@kira2139]

someone edit the riff off into the actual part in pitch perfect pls 1:22:25

[@christina_333]

Max is full blown my comfort person 🥺

[@tamsindave]

please do this again with the comments they're so funny

[@Raven_Luna_Tick]

Different names for the Guys. For George ARTHUR GC (to fit in with the other Arthurs), CRISPS (because he's such a snack) and KENT (Kent Clark because he's our hero). For Max MINI-MUM (He gives off such soccer mum vibes), TWINKIE (not because he's a snack but because he looks like he's full of cream) and DREWS-SILLA (because he looks as pale as a vampire in "Buffy").

[@marslia]

that singing section kinda ate

[@cierraclemens18]

I'd actually would be curious to hear George sing for real.

[@chloelord3578]

Aw George I feel for you, I’m sorry you got screwed over again 🫶. Also I love when you can tell Max has had enough sleep via the sanity of the conversation, great ep, I’m here for the longer eps P.S Milky Max works so well bc you look like the milky bar kid

[@bargainsstoragedeals3653]

Callum needs a camera now

[@pom.wmxoxo]

We also had a buddy bench at my school!

[@christina_333]

Please can I just come and sit in the corner and my the laugh sound track bc the way I laugh at this podcast is ungodly but also I should just but a ticket really

[@tutu3909]

Poor George, this is funny and sad at the same time.

[@dylanb5654]

Max does give off white boy with long name vibes, like, 100% could pass as Percival, Peregerine, Leopold… Maximus at a stretch.

[@kaylinbester9578]

I still dont know who Colleen Nolan is lmao

[@claireport22]

It's crazy to think some ppl are now siblings to their ex's couldn't imagine how weird/ awkward that is 🤔

[@JBW27]

I wanna know how many parties George goes to for Jedward to say they always see him out. Did they exaggerate or does George just go out all the time? I can understand that guy being apprehensive to help, especially on Halloween when you don't know if people are fucking about, but i can't pretend I wasn't a bit miffed that he didn't help George at the time 😅🤦🏻‍♂️ Also, Maya really did herself a disservice when she tried to say she hid in a bush for the programme. Like, why make it more difficult for yourself to sell the story?! 😂🙄🤦🏻‍♂️ EDIT: Coachella looks shit and American crowds are mild af, generally speaking.

[@craivera_3886]

My favourite part of the podcast is when max goes 'wait before we move on I have a story that Ive never told you before' and we all have definitely heard it before 😣

[@wonpilspinksweater1407]

Wow max looks like he’s lost 4kg good on him 💅

[@legster983]

Milky max is perfect! That’s has too stick !

[@bellaxholly]

i did not understand the straight talk george was on about either max not jst yiu 😭

[@alanaroberts477]

I'm in the UK and the link for the tickets doesn't work? anyone else having this

[@harrietbrxwn]

i’d say max looks more like denise welch but also petition to get him on loose women

[@abbierose4353]

The riff-off is the best thing I have ever watched

[@taytayslayslayslay]

icl (as a fellow northerner) i thought belfast was in scotland aswell

[@dylanb5654]

Im not even from the UK and I know who Coleen Nolan is 😂

[@user-gj4gl6ur3p]

I dont know who Coleen Nolan is😮

[@mimi-lh9nk]

callum sounds like andrew

[@tripledublu]

who tf is coleen nolan

[@mriarnkin]

I LOVE YOU MILKY MAX 🥛

[@tarrarowan5214]

Hearing Max getting so vexed over comments is so funny - ok calm down pinky

[@katexo9846]

I’m Irish and I know who Colleen Nolan is

[@Cassieellenm]

I am CRYING from 1 hr 20 on 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@Txbstar]

These are not long enough!!

[@meganstapo1867]

omg my comment got read ❤

[@han.ridl3y]

I wonder what Max's favourite Evie evolution is

[@ellie-jc5cj]

close the blinds next time lads it’s a bit bright

[@caitmorgan]

omg yeah max and colleen nolan why does that make sense