Top 10 Cycling Insults

[@zetadroid]

I'm an amateur weekend poser, but in my defence I ride solo.

[@Niganeiniganei]

You must have a thick face. Im too embarassed to ride alone. I feel like someone is watching me, especially commuting to work in the busy city!

[@jamiew.8873]

Gorges

[@Batistareparosautomotivos]

Lol!!!

[@XxBeastinXxT813]

Whats wrong with only riding on weekends tho?

[@dasdoin9600]

eyyyy 420

[@TommiHimberg]

The best use of "amateur" as an insult was a professor who was loudly yelling it at a photocopier machine that refused to do what he wanted.

[@CyberdyneSystemsSkynet]

warning profanity: kzbin.info/www/bejne/a4GxZ6ubosmdn80

[@abedfo88]

"you cycle like Dan Lloyd!" is one that always pops up

[@BackcountryBeginnings]

I'm sad. I just found out I'm an amateur. That bit where Stevens is struggling with his jersey...that's me.

[@benson1608]

3:02 "I'm pumping up my tire, it's personal!" - "I know, but it looks _epic_ !" 😂

[@johnduncan1489]

Really? My understanding of sandbagger was a very strong rider who races in a grade below their standard so they can win.

[@junkyarddaug]

+John Duncan agreed, your version applies across all sports really.

[@xlr8442]

+John Duncan I always thought "sandbagging" was when someone capable of competition, for whatever reason, decides to under-perform during said competition.

[@justindelarge3783]

+John Duncan The only time I have heard the term sandbagger used is in motocross, or similarly cherry picker. Guess it differs in cycling. But your version is what I am familiar with

[@echtogammut]

+John Duncan Yep that has been my understanding as well. It is so bad in the cat 3/4 class they started forcing upgrades.

[@charliedillon1400]

+John Duncan True here in the States. I did a really low key mountain bike race a while back and there was a group of about six "A" group riders racing in the "C" race. They were saying they wanted more training. When I got 11th out of 22 in my heat I considered it a top five. Full carbon MTB, shaved legs, team kit, in the "C" race = sandbaggers.

[@milanvdv]

Matt, you were probably called a cheesehead because you were wearing the British championship jersey? Because that jersey looks like the flag of the Netherlands and in Belgium we often refer to them (the Dutch) as 'kaaskop' which literaly means 'Cheesehead'. He thought you were a Dutchman!

[@obiwac]

Christ I was thinking the exact same thing

[@Callusny]

So you reckon he got a sandwich thrown at him because the guy thought he's Dutch?

[@annabakker5328]

@@Callusny Sounds like normal behaviour from Belgians ngl

[@ProBenji123]

damn, didnt know us belgians had our own version

[@DarkpowderUK]

I need to see that attack from the flag drop, who has the footage?

[@sputnic3032]

Don't you hate it when you're a pro rider and your mum does your packed lunch for the race. "But mum all the other guys have gels!"...... "if you don't eat your cheese rolls, I'm not doing you fish fingers for dinner"

[@taylorfriberg3620]

*making

[@iamf6641]

lmfao

[@onlyAerik]

"I'm pumping my tire, it's personal" latter half of this summer matt has always ruined it somehow

[@TheWaxChainFanClub]

Have to admit, I hadn't heard of most of these! Really enjoyed your story at the end, Matt. All these personal tales really bring the videos to life. Love hearing about all the teams personal racing memories.

[@Dabbtrabb]

I miss these videos... No slow-mo cuts. Just pure comedy....pure style..

[@Juan0003]

Finally! A whole video about me! ;¬)

[@001-j7l]

'Real men ride women!' Always a favourite of mine 😂

[@AndersJrgensen15]

GCN should make a "how to throw a cheese roll" video!

[@barneylaurance1865]

+Anders Jørgensen You mean "how to throw a cheese roll like a pro". We all know how to throw a cheese roll.

[@umvm]

My favourite was simply from a DH rider to a XC rider in a XC race. As the XC rider overtook him on the climb he just shouted "Cross Country Wanker!" just the irony and sillyness of it really got me.

[@christianright0958]

I think American and British bike insults are very differnt...:)

[@TheCatAteMyShoe]

And here I thought cheeseheads only came from Green Bay....

[@coreblo77er]

+TheCatAteMyShoe ??????

[@therealmrben808]

+rousseau green bay packer fans are called cheeseheads

[@therealmrben808]

ok thanks for the clarification as I thought it was specific to the football fans.

[@CyberdyneSystemsSkynet]

Speaking of, my Thursday night ride just got cancelled because it's the damn preseason again.

[@outerlimitsurvey]

I've always seen "poseur" but it seems both are correct. One I reacently heard is "Stravasshole" someone who records impossibly fast times for ride segments to make everyone else feel bad.

[@kaze8498]

Stravasshole... I am deceased.

[@kaze8498]

Stravasshole... I am deceased.

[@hxduck]

The biggest cycling insult? "mountain biker" ;D i make myself laugh

[@maniac0303]

+hxduck: And for mountain biker it is "roadie..." Always the same shit. The problem for me is, that i ride both.... :D

[@hxduck]

+Plan-E aka Niki Beckmann i have a confession to make... I ride both too D:

[@ademerturk281]

cocuk cizgi film

[@AdamHecht]

+hxduck I don't know, I'd be more upset about being called a triathlete.

[@roycohen6547]

+Adam Hecht I am a triathlete and a mountain biker xD

[@Colddeed]

I remember "Fred" as one I used to hear(not at me personally, just in general)

[@juanerasmog]

Si, you really need to see a physio about that rather limited pelvic range of motion at 1:15. It just doesn't look healthy mate...

[@gcn]

+juan erasmo gomez Prefer a little more thrusting would you Juan?!

[@juanerasmog]

+Global Cycling Network It would definitely help to bring more female viewers

[@helicart]

+juan erasmo gomez Yes, Si should never ever ever go on Dancing with the Stars, unless it's as the pole in a pole dancing act.

[@TheCatAteMyShoe]

+juan erasmo gomez Matt is enough to bring me to this channel...

[@jakonovski]

+juan erasmo gomez What are you talking about, Si's dead sexy.

[@pushtyeekah]

"Cheesehead" at 4:44 in slo mo had me struggling not to spit out me porridge laughing. You've just taken GCN vids to a whole new, dare I say Epic, cinematic level. Thanks for the lunchtime laugh.

[@mwbgaming28]

I don't see a problem with conserving energy so you can open it up on the final stretch, people that complain about that are probably the same people who complain about campers in FPS games (assuming they also play FPS games)

[@kalina8877]

had to laugh SO hard on the sit on sprinter end scene!!!! you guys rock!!! ^^

[@briansteele2723]

'All the Gear and no Idea'... the type of guys who ride around talking about gear all day but whose riding skills and fitness leaves a lot to be desired.

[@joebailey8845]

+Brian Steele That would be called a "Fred"

[@01simmenj]

Are you THE Brian Steele?!

[@briansteele2723]

+01simmenj I am not the ex-Pro if that is what you mean, nor I am the Brian Steele the SCIFI actor :) I am a Scottish paraglider and road cyclist based in Grasse, France. I'm on instagram @instasteeley

[@blabber1975]

A bit snobby Brian, no need to be jealous of people who have more money than you

[@dafunk3231]

Most of those videos were filmed out side my village

[@brownishblue]

"I'm pumping up my tires, it's personal!" that's amazing :D

[@Dragonman0876]

Last Sunday I was headed back home after a ride with my mates and happened to cross path with a fellow road biker adopting an aero stance on his tri bar clip ons when he merged to the road I was on at a cross junction. He was going like 25 or 26km/hr all the while in that aero stance. And not wanting to be an asshole rider, or passing a wrong insult message, I followed behind for a good 5 mins or so till we came to a traffic junction where I saw the best opportunity to overtake while he slowed down (traffic was safe to do so). Think he didn't like that, and sprinted to want to take lead. As he came up to me, I tried to give a friendly nod, but was completed ignored. And in that instance, I decided to deliver the best insult by continuing to hold onto the hood of my bar, pull as straight and 'relaxed' a face as I could (but dying inside), and powering up enough to drop him and continuing at the powered up speed for as long as I could, never once turning the head back. Hahaha. I think all riders should mount a small side mirror for this sake.

[@bingola45]

This is the sort of cycling that has no place on the public highway. The roads are for travelling on; not for racing, or for people to indulge their hobbies or fetishes.

[@pixel_supp]

Oh get off it

[@eugenehvorostyanov2409]

Nice little story. I like it.

[@jadaneberly3852]

This video is awesome, definitely going on my favorites list

[@JosueGomez520]

this is one hell of a video!!! absolutely great!!

[@jamesstannard6452]

Si's face in the half-wheeling video. Brilliant. haha.

[@TeamSteamRacing]

I usually just get called knobhead

[@gamma_dablam]

And I sometimes ride when there is an over 60% chance of rain. Rain really isn’t that bad usually

[@patricklavin3079]

I thought a half-wheeler was someone who lined up their front wheel with your rear, effectively riding in your blind spot

[@luisbretonv]

LOL this is hilarious, great combination of Matt's voice and Sy's acting.... Syy?? lol

[@TobiasDahlhaus]

Chopper has to be number 1.

[@factsabouturmum9250]

I've recently added a new favorite to my lexicon of cycling insults. I took it from bodybuilder culture. "Do You Even Lift?" DYEL is an amazingly versatile insult so I have adapted it to cycling by swapping out the final word for appropriate terminology. Do You Even Ride? Do You Even Fast? Do You Even Climb? Do You Even Cargo? Hell, for that matter, Do You Even Lift? The applications are endless. Try it out yourself! But then again, Do You Even Ride?

[@uweabraham3588]

I guess I am a weekend warrior cheese head (Green Bay fan) amateur poser who also rides alone! I love the list & the video! ;-) Thanks!

[@hossesarse]

Can't believe these freds didn't put fred on the list!

[@bowsershark]

Or, BARNEY

[@AndrewTSq]

"I am pumping up my tires, its personal" :D :D Got to love the old style GCN :)

[@umbrto]

It would be great to see your videos with closed caption. I really enjoy your videos, im watching you from mexico.

[@williamstroo4567]

Aw crap I'm many of these things

[@whysoserious1870]

you guys have an awesome bikes. I wish someday I have one of them like and I like your videos. 😊😊

[@benazoulay3673]

you guys have to make make a blooper video! you're all too funny!

[@michaelcarrera1]

God i love the look of the kask protone helmet Matt wears.

[@annalongfield]

Simon's celebration was great for sit on sprinter.

[@jeremysagnol5742]

sit on sprinters? we call them Nullabors (Only got one turn , like crossing the Nullabor plain)

[@mrdavecee7248]

I'm watching that one again straight away. So funny.

[@mrdavecee7248]

+MrDaveCee Y'see, I did just watch it again #notaliar

[@Metal-Possum]

Hubbard is a good one, more useful than most of these, especially for strangers.

[@williammorganti8346]

A cheese head is some one in Wisconsin in USA! Great videos keep it up

[@PapaJenkinz]

does it always fucking rain in england

[@AtlantisArch]

+PapaJenkinz yes, even sometimes in the shower !

[@SweetandFitting]

+PapaJenkinz It only stops when you go abroad.

[@glennoc8585]

+PapaJenkinz Not half as much as Ireland. In fairness it doesn't always rain in england because it snows on the other days,

[@Wakey585]

+PapaJenkinz only when somebody, somewhere is riding a Bike =p

[@williamkeys5701]

+PapaJenkinz It does rain every day in the UK, except for the days that it doesn't.

[@rahulkota1]

I liked how in the end in an effort to get the turn wrong, Matt and Simon got it perfectly right...really a good pass :) ... Very "Pro Amateur" !!!!!

[@x-raymind7778]

Nice sound effects on the sprint

[@jimmyrustler6652]

Do another presenter bikes video since you've all got new ones

[@syntrax-og]

now do them for MTB!!! These were hilarious!

[@whatsdougupto]

Love this video.. This one defiantly makes my top 10 :) Thanks for the channel!!!

[@tquintana-parker8724]

OMG how you guys make me laugh! And it's not the shots of tequila! I've never been known to commit any of those offenses! ;-)

[@aaroncogs]

Nuff Nuff, Hubbard and Johnson are 3 terms used locally. They are often interchangeable, depending on how much of a "Johnson" the rider being i sulted is. Also, locally, a sandbager is someone who enters a race at an easy handicap for their ability.

[@factsabouturmum9250]

You forgot Yuppie. You know, the guy who has a $7000 bike, pro kit, $200 shades, aero bars, and all the most expensive carbon bottle cages/ lightweight bar tape.... And then he hardly rides. And when he does, he's quite slow. Go back to your caviar and cocaine, Mr. Hotshot. One should also remember, "25 yard dash man." You know, the guy who is pretty sure he's better than you, so he hammers as hard as he can in a high gear just to pass you, then immediately drops in speed, causing you to either grab the brakes or swing out into the lane to overtake him... Just stay behind me, homie, 'cuz you ain't even fast.

[@MrAngry3232]

facts about ur mum You sound jealous

[@louisevans3608]

Pretty sure that "cheese roll" had ham on it.

[@floridamanmick1372]

“I’m pumpin up my tyres, it’s personal!” 😂😂😂

[@jbratt]

Glass cranker...oh man, we have one of those in our area, when he is not a wheel sucker.

[@laseriste29]

"Raton" = "raton laveur" = "raccoon". But I still love your french!

[@adamrichardson2227]

"I'm pumpin' up my tire, It's personal" lmao

[@ethansandstedt1551]

How many times has a presenter thrown something at another presenter?

[@NealWilliams]

3:13 I actually cancelled my trip to Rhode Island because it was gonna rain all weekend!

[@CanopycultureTV]

“I’m pumpin up me tyre it’s personal!”😂😂😂

[@widgetno1]

Went all the way from the cycling cafe to the anchor!

[@robbchastain3036]

A big insult I saw on the pack of a commuter one late afternoon in '09 in DC was a sign that said "NO DRAFTING." I, too, was a westbound commuter that day, waiting at the line at a light near the Smithsonian. And the only reason I saw his stupid sign was that he encroached on my position, sorta scooting half his road bike in front of my commuter mountain bike on my left. Then another commuter did the same thing on my right. And I did not appreciate the disrespect, like who where these guys to crowd me out? So I calmly waited for the light and as soon as I saw green, I launched myself immaculately between them as they clipped in and I sprinted furiously until I had just pipped the next light. And when I looked back, Mister No Drafting knew he'd been schooled. And I just smiled and sailed away and swooped over the 14th Street Bridge and then up the trail to Rosslyn with him surely seething back there somewhere. it was great. And I was thinking, "Don't worry, dude, I don't need to draft you."

[@helmuthvonmoltke858]

In the Philippines, I always receive the phrase “papakamatay ka ba?” From the motorists, I just pretend I didn’t understand as I am British

[@khaidax185]

It translates to "Are you trying to get yourself killed? / Are you trying to kill yourself?". For those who are wondering.

[@Thunderbolt03]

Oh I laughed all the way to the end of the video

[@connorspies]

Genuinely funny!

[@theylivewesee1674]

where Matt "plays" amateur is actually blooper of one the older videos

[@leggetty]

"nice bike, old engine." speeds by.

[@sapturnus]

In Brazilian Portuguese we have some jewels too, like "cabaço", literally "hymen", for amateurs.

[@kylieminou7775]

In this shelter in place era, I decided to give my bike a spring cleaning, not an accurate term, I ride year round and I keep my bike in shape all the time, and I was faced with the first hurdle: in pre covid-19 times, I would just go to the recycle bin of the building and pick up a couple of newspapers from the top, no I don't dare, how things change! will still do the cleaning, though.

[@echtogammut]

What are Si's sunglasses? They look like Spy Alphas but the logo looks more like Oakley or Smith. I have been hunting for a more minimal size like that for when I practice running from zombies.

[@wesofx8148]

Mooch. Always asking for food, tools, or tire tubes. They don't bring anything because they know you'll bring everything.

[@greg_loper]

Does anyone else use the term 'Pro' as an insult? Typically aimed at a cyclist who has all the latest kit but not a clue. Often said sarcastically as in "Look at him, even his balls are made of carbon and he is off the back, he is a real pro."

[@ronaldtartaglia4459]

I love Si. he is hilarious.

[@dennisdownes9319]

Ah, the half wheeler!! Exactly....a favorite tactic of my friend; AKA- "CEMENT HEAD!" DD

[@chaosbreaker657]

Dive Bomber Basically someone who lets out a loud and wet fart during a downhill ride. Made much worse if said rider ate beans and/or eggs just before the ride.

[@OwenWatkins21]

Am-a-chur*

[@thatwolffe3802]

+Owen Watkins depends which dialect you use

[@furrybroccoli1973]

+Owen Watkins Yeah.. I've never heard "am-a-ta" before, always "am-a-ture".

[@SuperRat420]

Sup, bruh, I'm also from America; can we not do this?

[@robinburt5735]

I've heard many peeps shout Glass cranker at me. Well it was something that sounds similar anyway...

[@vilieto]

MTB to Road cyclists is "Lycros". I've heard it quite a few times around here.

[@maniac0303]

+vilieto Yeah sometimes I heard the same or simular. But I ride MTB with same kind of clothes (lycra) which I use with my roadbike. The MTB-Riders who says this shit, are idiots. And in this case they hate XC-Rider like me as well...

[@vilieto]

Plan-E aka Niki Beckmann Ye I don't get it either, because I use those long lycra cycling pants no matter what bike I'm on (got both a hardtrail one for offroad and in the city, and a roadie for whenever I feel like touring the Turku archipelago). If I'm going in the city or offroad, I'd just throw some shorts over and won't look like an idiot when being off the bike (in the city mostly, nobody cares in the forest).

[@jlimozin]

I have never ridden in a group ride in France, so don't know of "rateau", which is probably what the word was... It means a rake. Presumably, slowing you down if you have one behind you..

[@jacktheobald9880]

+Global Cycling Network, can u do vid on wot every bit of essential clothing u need for cycling

[@uudecode]

Mates, explain please about 'glass crank' .

[@johanoseroff9081]

Always celebrate like that when i pass commuters omw to work. I see nothing wrong with that?

[@alexwalker9803]

Lycra lout is a Bristol favourite.

[@SpeedBoosted911]

Ahaha, very funny one :))) Thank you

[@sQWERTYFALIEN2011]

Funny ! I had to concentrate and listen carefully because I don't speak English . I only speak American LOL :)

[@SlowBoyAthlete]

#11: Triathlete cyclist! hahah Oooohh! couldn't resist, hehe.

[@glennoc8585]

Mr Fox said "Thanks for the cheese roll" albeit the low fat variety (;-P

[@reginaldscot165]

the worst insult in cycling is not subscribing to GCN... am I right? :)

[@leoja4578]

Where is that town at 0:50? Looks like somewhere in Devon.

[@gcn]

+Leo Tapp I think they were in St Briavels.

[@leoja4578]

+Global Cycling Network Ah ok.

[@samkorber4065]

Leo Tapp It looks like Tintern Abbey

[@dunkelheit8594]

You need to make videos about throwing bread at your fellow mates whilst riding

[@sargeaap]

isn't a "sandbagger", "wheel sucker" and "sit on sprinter" the same? The insults result the same way

[@shadrachmalooly9394]

I now know what to call ALL the roadies here in Switzerland who come up for a free ride.... SANDBAGGER.... The home made "Come Through or Piss Off" sticker on my mudguard didn't work.

[@anonymousshitposter1743]

Probably only popular now in the internet age but I think "Fred" would be good for this list.