Guaranteed* Audio Episode 10: Dinosaurs!

[@impwolf]

LET NEIL SAY DANG

[@bananajam2208]

3:27 neil just.. picks up his leg to cross it

[@cryptid221]

Neil isn’t real

[@_t0xikk]

@@cryptid221 what

[@cryptid221]

@@_t0xikk T’is a hologram

[@meli_lemon_real]

it was probably asleep bc when my leg falls asleep i do that

[@cryptid221]

@@luvedd that’s for you to find out :)

[@waterPsychiatrist]

We got the dinosaurs we just need the orchestra now

[@monoclese]

It’ll appear on his roof very soon

[@twinfantasytowers]

Yup

[@adamsuniverse]

The production on this is A+. Most podcasts are audio only in a dingy apartment

[@KevinJamesVideo]

Adam's Universe Thanks man. We try.

[@flamingolegs]

is it bad that i actually repeated "theres no such thing as dinosaurs"

[@GuaranteedVideo]

No, that means you helped!

[@flamingolegs]

LOVELY!!!

[@tjzambonischwartz]

I was shouting "FUCK YOU ASSHOLES," but I'm a paleontologist so I take that shit kinda personally...

[@GuaranteedVideo]

♥

[@Mr__Joe]

I did too lol

[@elliot._.119]

3:27 I’m sorry I love how Neil picked up his leg to cross it I don’t know why I just found it funny

[@spooky_k6168]

When Neil pulled out his notepad instead of a phone to look at some notes he made, my heart got a little fuller. I don’t know why it was so heart warming to see but it really made my day haha. The podcast was fantastic!

[@YouBredRaptorsMusic]

It still bums me out how much time went into this and how FEW people have watched it. We can do better as a planet. I know we can.

[@GuaranteedVideo]

Ongoing & previous episodes of the show are over at THIS KZbin channel (Guaranteed Video). We figured we'd make episode 10 a bigger video production than your run of the mill podcast, hence why it ended up here. Thanks for watching/listening!

[@EhvinnTee]

Guaranteed* Video Will you do this for every 10 podcasts? That'd be pretty sweet! Sweet-tacular, even!

[@GuaranteedVideo]

Evan Tsilimidos Maybe! The traffic was so low on this we might need to reconsider video versions going forward. We did a bare bones video one for episode 7, which was fun. We want to do a video component for #12, too.

[@EhvinnTee]

Guaranteed* Video Well maybe just upload some form of video highlight reel, or just a specific segment, on Neil's channel, and the full podcast on the Guaranteed channel. Double Toasted does that with their KZbin channel. But it probably isn't worth it if setting up for video is such a hassle. I mean the set dressing alone in this one podcast is top-tier!! You could make the full video podcast a Patreon thingy, and post titillating moments on the Neil channel to ENTICE the good people!

[@KevinJamesVideo]

Evan Tsilimidos Very true. We probably should have done that with this one.

[@alphabassist]

Guaranteed* Video thanks for posting this on Neil’s channel! Since this was posted, I’ve gone on to discover Guaranteed*Video and binged all the previous episodes of the podcast.

[@CherrygroveCity]

Neil has risen

[@008TheDen]

Funfact: In the a deleted scene we learn how Professor Screweyes lost his eye. He was sleeping next to a berry bush when a berry fell on his eye and then a crow pecked out his eye to get the berry. So first off, nice job remembering that Neil, and second that is such a dumb origin and a horrible reason to turn evil.

[@felFiles]

omfg when Neil started listing the random plot points it made me realize I've seen this movie?! Oh man I remember being confused out of my mind as a kid watching this horror

[@etremely]

mr cicierega i would die for u

[@Ticklebrush]

god me too

[@pawdragon1781]

Yeah same

[@spxnel8402]

etremely man i would too.

[@spxnel8402]

etremely i would too.

[@shrimpfriedhuntling]

me too bro

[@fireballninja01]

fuck i want more guaranteed audio

[@AIOctober]

I have never wanted to revisit “We’re Back: A Dinosaur’s Story” more than right the hell now, mission accomplished boys.

[@quantumblauthor7300]

Until the scenes where the guy falls apart into screws and the mind breaking starts. W h y

[@ellesmellz9480]

they just… gaslit the dinosaur out of existence ???

[@stillnesssolutions]

I've been following you guys for like a decade (as in internet following, not in-person following) and I still love that you guys are creating content together to this day :) keep up the good work!

[@llamallover1057]

I'm sure they appreciate the clarification

[@FishSticker]

@@llamallover1057 agreed

[@StateOfTheArt]

Thank you Neil, Very Cool!

[@aAaAAA-ppgg]

A.E.I.O.U. :)

[@srgtnoobkiller]

i love neil's tiny notebook

[@junkofzckingenoshima]

first podcast that actually cstches my interest

[@LSmallButera]

CAN'T BELIEVE THIS HIT PIECE

[@neilcic]

Looks like audiences won't be coming "back" for more "We're Back". This film really turned the screws in our eyes. A true dino-snore's story.

[@pineappleindie]

@@neilcic hilarious, made me roll on my floor, reading this made me flabbergasted, bamboozled, gobsmacked even, I cannot breath due to the hilariousness of this reply on the video name “Guaranteed* Audio Episode 10: Dinosaurs!” On the online platform used for posting videos named KZbin on a place called the internet where other websites are seen. Thank you for making this hilarious comment Neil, you are the best!

[@BellaExclamationMark]

I'm gonna smoke jazz cigars because Rodney Dangerfield said it was a good idea!!

[@ntgm8]

Best opening ever

[@BrightAGen]

42:17 Pterry was not a pet. PeeWee could not confine his power. Pterry could take over the playhouse if he wanted.

[@abnt_official]

The fact that this channel has 560k subscribers and only 9k check out a new upload goes to show how long Neil has been doing this. A large majority of those 560k accounts are so old that they're abandoned.

[@furiousmagician5912]

and now 666k

[@redmantis3336]

Now 727k, and 31k have watched this

[@theoyourecool]

Aww nooo Hereditary was so good! To be fair I think it's that I'm not a huge horror movie buff, and I liked the emotional horror that went on throughout Acts 1 and 2 moreso than the classic horror they shoved in there at the very end. I did have a lot of gripes with the fact that they tried to be both, because they made me invested in the characters only to treat them the way they did towards the end, it just didn't feel like a satisfying ending.

[@KevinJamesVideo]

Theo I just saw it and liked it a lot.

[@theoyourecool]

hell yeah

[@octangula7914]

I agree! I do think that they did a bad job advertising the movie though.

[@kyzf]

Hereditary was like what a four year old with an unlimited budget would make after watching ten horror movies.

[@Dielawn69]

@@kyzf haha sure buddy...

[@MrStarman926]

That was the most exciting and interactive podcast opening I’ve ever experienced

[@stupchek6140]

I am not much of a podcast person but I really enjoyed this! Thanks guys, love the formal attire.

[@hyper-thermal]

Great episode! However, I disagree with Ryan's views on the movie Hereditary, especially since I personally thought it was really effective. I would like to know a bit more about why it fell flat for him so that I can come to a better understanding of the film from a more complete perspective rather than just my own. Also, on "Smart Horror" being a trend, I do agree that it started strong, but I also think that by having more of a spotlight on it will inevitably lead to even greater films of that specific type being made, what methods are best suited for the production of such films, and so on.

[@BellaExclamationMark]

56:00 now I'll NEVER know what it looks like because you guys forgot to put it in the video! Oh no!

[@obscurideer]

i saw a dinosaur yesterday

[@sean..L]

your mum is a dinosaur!

[@obscurideer]

This guy I haven’t seen my mom in ten years :(

[@sean..L]

Henry, I’m sorry to hear that.

[@ezrawyrd9275]

Dreadful creatures

[@DannyDevitoPNG]

That movie sucks

[@surreptitiousbox6903]

This is the greatest thing I've discovered this year

[@heatherm00ch]

I've been a loyal fan since at least 2007, I'm really enjoying your change to the format of your channel! I think it's a great, smart, and adaptable move!!! Love you

[@ZazoBeck]

This is actually quality content though. I'm constantly impressed by you guys. Congratulations!

[@tobey7246]

i love you neil

[@onychophorum]

*YOU*

[@picklejar7236]

@@onychophorum us

[@crassinula]

Me too

[@spencercain8679]

I had We're Back: A Dinosaur Story on DVD and I have weird feverish memories of finding it boring and resenting my family members for playing it. Don't remember anything that actually happened in it. I'm actually a little glad it's been brought up now so I know it was real.

[@yonkers_millyrock]

Also, I'm not sure if anyone else has said this, but if you guys haven't seen HBomberguy's dissertation on Lovecraft, his writing and his (terrible) beliefs, you should totally check it out!

[@iamapie13]

I remember in halloween it was dress up day in my school and I didn't care enough to dress up, but then they said that anyone with a costume could get out of class and all my friends had costumes, so I went to the culinary teacher and asked if he had an empty cardboard box and I wore it around my waist and pretended I had a costume, somehow it worked and they let me skip class. next year I went dressed like a hobo and carried a sign that say's "can you spare some candy?"

[@mobius273]

that rodney dangerfield bit was WILD

[@GuaranteedVideo]

mobius We just posted it standalone on the Guaranteed* channel.

[@strideryourself]

YES ITS MY THREE FAVORITE PEOPLE!!!

[@aubreyseaton]

01:08:05 "I had wormed it up for about ten seconds"

[@ahoy1014]

There's no such thing as dinosaurs.

[@lightbluepika2175]

if neil came back everything would be okay again 😔

[@yourdailydoseofbfb__6865]

0:59 HEYHEYHEY WATCH YOUR PROFANITY!!

[@theonlyenicfanever5346]

This is incredible

[@NoName-lm2bs]

My enjoyment was severely impacted by your folded orange foam.

[@CowboyLibrarian]

Cought the subtle Venkman quote from Kevin during the quiz, “No studying.” Well played.

[@Guruc13]

Holy cow, this was a blast from my past. I love this new perspective on my childhood, haha! Thanks gang!

[@newmusicmark]

Yes! Fun soundtrack! Dan Hartman was actually in Edgar Winter Group as well!

[@pbsamanthamarie]

I liked the Jurassic Park / Care Bears mash up at the beginning.

[@kaylovescats__]

I laughed at the huge ass dinosaur walking casually through the door

[@lamp4791]

those chairs look so comfy I have nothing else to say

[@gelotologistgrandma3791]

48:50 i know it's like a 'goof' or whatever but crack legit owns bonesj

[@thomasnewton7991]

I want to meet Neil

[@orinami3310]

This is the content I need at 4 am. Thank you guaranteed* audio!

[@roadtriiip]

>PODCASTING COMPOUND

[@sirpineapple2486]

Unpopular opinion: Black Mirror is just the Goosebumps TV show

[@matamoney]

love you guys

[@Rangernewb5550]

I watched your podcast before I watched the latest RLM episode. You better be thankful.

[@gobacktomars3785]

I'm a loser, gender neutral clown.

[@lola_daytona]

This randomly played on my tv and that guy Ryan I totally thought he was Nardwaur based on the voice

[@Bawgle]

Only time I ever saw We're Back was when Toon Disney still existed. *Toon. Disney.*

[@ninjabuddy1]

I've come from the future year of 2020 to inform you there is a Highlander anime, and I think the band him is involved in some capacity

[@bartham9285]

love your vids!

[@CattyAttie]

I feel so thrown off. I'm just waiting for this to suddenly end on an ironic, satirical, cheesy joke at any given second and nothing they are saying is serious and it's all just a long joke.

[@yonkers_millyrock]

I’ve never been so happy to get a notification!

[@snowtoastpro665]

41:00 the funniest shit ever

[@kellee101]

I like this, I'd like to see more.

[@scheddoc]

i can’t believe joe jonas is a fan of neil’s mouth

[@tristenarctician6910]

This is the least viewed neil cicierega video

[@ChelseaColeslaw]

Where is the canned laughter from? I swear you can hear it during Zach Galifianakis in Comedians of Comedy. And also Lasagna Cat.

[@TokuSociety]

I'm only here because it had Dinosaur in the title xD

[@KevinJamesVideo]

SEO: accomplished!

[@guitarbrother1234]

I'm confused. Is there such a thing as dinosaurs?

[@qandrshow-m7k]

no

[@spongbros]

Biker Mice From Mars had Snickers.

[@funkilyinsufferability8013]

'you guys should legalize it' haha yeah Oregon moment

[@Babypickleroblox]

Guaranteed audio

[@Lunar_Atronach]

I forgot that rodney dangerfield died so i got really sad when i just saw a floating skeleton

[@nickmoody3318]

your still great

[@joshuavickery86]

I had We're Back on VHS

[@transcendentalanarchy]

Here it is, the least viewed video on this channel

[@Dr_E_Yekley]

As of 11:32 CDT, nobody had officially finished this yet

[@Dr_E_Yekley]

Charles Vernon henlo ¶:

[@wafflesthevilwarrior]

There's no such thing as dinosaurs!

[@MegaOctobot]

1:01:06

[@spanospy]

I'm gonna be one of those people that say "make more music instead of this!", but I also understand why you're also doing this. Don't let me stop you.

[@neilcic]

I am also making music a lot. I'm just saving it up for the next album.

[@KevinJamesVideo]

Neil Cicierega The beauty of podcasting: you can do it while making other stuff! (At least in our case, where we only really do podcast every five weeks)

[@pepperypeppers2755]

1:06:20 Toblerone time

[@infiniteregressions]

Wait, I haven't watched the entire podcast yet, so maybe this comes up somehow, but is that the keyboardist from The Workout? (video for reference: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bauWaHh4l76tjrc)

[@KevinJamesVideo]

It is! Corey rocks- he's worked with me on a few projects (namely The Creed a few years back). He's also worked with Math the Band.

[@infiniteregressions]

Awesome! I'll have to check that stuff you mentioned out, thanks.

[@theWORKOUTmusic]

infiniteregressions !!!!!!!!! Good eye !

[@infiniteregressions]

Thanks, it was a fun experience to see you/him and slowly make the connection. It's been a minute since Bomb Voyage, anything in the pipe line you rascals?

[@theWORKOUTmusic]

infiniteregressions actually yes. Shifted members around a little bit. Writing new material, and probably going to be releasing something in 2019 with any luck.

[@ilikespacedinosaurs]

Why have none of your recentish videos showed up in my sub box other than this one? I thought there had been another neil drought

[@KevinJamesVideo]

ilikespacedinosaurs I've been asking KZbin about this on Twitter for months. My suggestion? Click the notification bell.

[@ilikespacedinosaurs]

Kevin J. James I actually did get notified about this video on my phone, but this is the first time it's happened

[@marcopivetta7796]

gotta legalize glue first, tho

[@VillainKinnie]

is that notepad actually tiny? or are you just, like, 7ft tall? either way i still value you as a human

[@devadedo]

And got stuck, in the sap

[@alacazam5803]

"Are we gonna stay in our suits" "No"

[@yellojared]

He used the imp camel sound DIDNT he

[@lemon.zip2]

1:10:13 same thing happened to me but with stranger things a while back and I feel so bad abt it especially since the 4th season just came out;-;

[@TheDemonicHobo]

Holy shit did Kevin lose 90lbs

[@arrolace]

Least viewed video

[@Chazer5]

From this distance Neil looks like a lesbian

[@Chazer5]

@@lamp4791 As much as I hate to admit it, I'm only funny when people are either sleep-deprived or high.

[@gunkymcsplunky]

There was some actual drama a few years back where some man thought Neil was a lesbian but he obviously isn’t.

[@itsanicecube8262]

*dinosaur*

[@baggybants]

This is the least popular video Neil has made

[@meli_lemon_real]

that’s really sad 😢

[@baggybants]

Yes

[@fosterobject31]

Oh no

[@willycruger1625]

Stinky Cheese If you pleasse s