H.P Joelcraft

[@wildpiercy1141]

When the warlock multiclasses bard

[@kevinstipek2696]

Or just takes the entertainer background in 5e

[@IainCiplinski]

😆😆

[@stevenengland4254]

Gold 10/10

[@benthomason3307]

Paula Abdul Alhazred.

[@hawkwilliams8355]

Now I have an image in my head of Nyarlathotep dressed in a cheap suit banging this out in a smoky, non-euclidean dive bar surrounded by many-tentacled eldritch horrors, all drinking their sorrows away. Fantastic.

[@RedstoNeman0]

he sorta did in "Nyarlatothep", dude can be cool af sometimes.

[@nlb137]

A man walks up the pianist and says "You know you're a terrifying monstrosity?" The pianist responds "Hum a few bars and I'll pick it up."

[@nerdycannon6942]

Now Hastur at the bar is a friend of mine He has a sign that I can't unsee And he's quick with a croak or to mesmerize a bloke But there's someplace that he'd rather be He says, "Tep, I believe this is killing me" As the gore dripped off of his face "Well I'm sure that I could be a theater star If I could get out of this place"

[@valritz1489]

And the cultists are practicing sacrifice While the scholars, they slowly despair Yes they're sharing a drink they call "Decadence" But it's better than facing R'lyeh

[@nerdycannon6942]

Now Yig is a spotted snake enthusiast Who's worshipers live serpentine lifes And he's talkin' with a yith, who's faded in to myth Thanks to his species shoggoth strifes.

[@void.control]

What I like about this is that the juxtaposition is obviously humorous but the way the song is performed actually sounds legitimately sincere, and I really love hearing that.

[@zonesthesia]

Lead me to the man responsible for this so I might indenture myself to his eternal service.

[@JulianVelard1]

I am here

[@zonesthesia]

I am SO EMBARASSED! *blushes* Srsly, tho, send me a pm if you want to go grab drinks.

[@zonesthesia]

We got it all worked out. ;-)

[@JulianVelard1]

We did? Still waiting on my award.

[@zonesthesia]

Check your fb inbox, o dark servant of he shall not be named!

[@ACruelPicture]

I can serious hear this as the end theme of a film adaptation of a Lovecraft story.

[@nicko6773]

At 2:51, that wistful delivery of "I have scanned the vast ivy-clad palace" gets me every time. This is actually unironically good. I applaud you, good sir.

[@Brianna-eo8nu]

I really hope somebody shows this to Guillermo del Toro.

[@Gary-rs1re]

This will now and forever be what Nyarlathotep's voice will sound like in my head. Thanks -_-

[@Cajaquarius]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/eGjIfptmgNdng80 This should fix that.

[@HappyBeezerStudios]

when you meet the crawling chaos and you bring out your harmonica

[@n0denz]

Thanks, I can't read Nemesis anymore without hearing Piano Man.

[@AlphaWhelp]

This must be the lullaby that Nyarlathotep sings to Azathoth

[@Remimi_in_prison]

this is canon now

[@theopersson2392]

Why can't this be cannon

[@jojones4685]

Monoyoodshashi

[@davidstuckey9289]

. . . I've always thought it was "Locomotive Breath". But this might indeed be a better choice.

[@ChroniclerAether]

Let me tell you a story, one of a student, much stressed, who found that this song hit the right level of mindless melody and intricacy that allowed it to slither into their subconscious to elicit a strange, studious calm. Much was this song played in the lead-up to the bane of all students, the onslaught of exams and cumulative projects. Some say that the student, still studying, *still* studying, has absorbed the song. They are yet unable to recite the poem verbatim, but will be able to sing it after hearing just a few bars of the song, forgetting the words again as soon as the music ends. (Help. *laughs*)

[@MrFPRdz]

This is the only version that matters as it is the one that carries out the entire tune till the end

[@fortune8408]

MrFPRdz What would it be without the melody? Nothing.

[@IanBurkePerry]

This guy's voice is great, though given that this is going viral he might want to take the time to record a new version, as he's off on a few words here (i.e. abysses, pharaoh's first), still impressive, though!

[@MrFPRdz]

IanBurkePerry yeeeeeees I didn’t want to be the one to mention it but yes yes yes that absolutely bothers me and I try to make it work by trying to pronounce abysses in a way that doesn’t bother me but I can’t he definitely should re record but idk if we will have the same type of magic he presented with his first version, thank you for mentioning it

[@joshuagrant3299]

This is what happens when Randolph Carter decides to just get wasted and play piano.

[@tesseraph]

You know how sometimes a cover becomes the definitive version of a song? This is one of those times.

[@cumulushair2051]

this is now the only version of piano man i will ever listen to.

[@JulianVelard1]

You're welcome

[@evnchw]

This is the best thing on the internet

[@thomaskilmer]

I'm torn between laughing hysterically and shutting up so I can listen to your gorgeous voice.

[@skovner]

This is great, and the shoggoth on my roof agrees

[@ValerianMacMillan]

This never, in all my aeons of sorrow, grows old.

[@GuitarRocker2008]

Chant us a spell, you're the great old one Chant us a spell tonight Well, this all is so completely maddening And you've got us quakeing with fright

[@skovner]

This is up there with Wierd Al

[@america8706]

As a huge fan of Billy Joel and currently beginning my journey into H.P. Lovecrafts world this is great.

[@flair541]

I picture Cthulhu going around our universe in its infancy, just looking at the birthing of planets and the odd super-sized dead civilization.

[@randallbesch2424]

Cthulhu was created by the melding of an entire species into one super being..

[@flair541]

@@randallbesch2424 where was that written?

[@arlem525]

This is wonderful EXCEPT that it is abysses, not abscesses. The former is a bottomless pit, the latter are infected sores draining with pus. But still thank you! Nemesis is my favorite Lovecraft poem and Piano Man is my favorite Billy Joel song.

[@draeath]

He also sings "I was old when the first Pharaohs mounted" instead of "I was old when the Pharaohs first mounted" but yes - this is extraordinary :D

[@daltonmortimer7735]

And its epochs not epics but screw it

[@arlem525]

And 3 entire lines were cut (the 5th lines of 3 stanzas), still it's brilliant.

[@Kutulhu]

Epoch is pronounced 'epic', not EE-pok.

[@Kutulhu]

But also, perhaps those changes are to get as close as possible to Piano Man, the song, for the purposes of aural pleasure.

[@skovner]

I think this is a great song to listen to before going to bed - through the ghoul-guarded gateways of slumber....

[@HappyBeezerStudios]

don't forget your silver key

[@skovner]

@@HappyBeezerStudios Thanks for reminding me. There must be some wierd cosmic connection, because I was thinking about this song at work and the notification of your comment came in. However, I need to be careful as my internet connection at work may be monitored by Nyarlathotep's minions.

[@Paleopiper]

I'm playing this in my first lecture of the term in Historical Geology today...verses 2 & 3 are perfect.

[@JulianVelard1]

And? What did your students say?

[@wolframironside5858]

This is calming with a sense of deep time and endless aeons. A perfect yin yang balance

[@GrombarSmash]

I sang this at karaoke last Friday.

[@JulianVelard1]

This version???

[@GrombarSmash]

Yep, I practiced by watching your video a bunch of times.

[@tylerbrown8098]

This needs a constant, unsettling slow-zoom just like the other one.

[@chaosfive55]

I've often re-worked Joel's "Allen-Town" into "Arkham-Town": "Oh yes we're nervous here in Arkham Town, And they had to close the mortuary down; 'Cause the dead got up and walked awaaaay... Well, that's what they say..."

[@P99AT]

That also works to the tune of "Uptown Girl".

[@JamminPanda]

I find it funny that H.P. Lovecraft basically created Arkham city in D.C. comics.

[@cyclos12]

You actually made me memorize this poem, the lyrics of your song don't include the whole of the lyrics of the poem so I had to look it up

[@8tymology]

H.P. ianoman

[@owlfrog]

It's the theremin and synth in the instrumental sections

[@AmberLecuyer]

Play this at my funeral.

[@Ley606]

Amber Lecuyer will do

[@Ley606]

Love youuu

[@maxmason6779]

it was played at mine.

[@MattieSheldonTheYoutuber]

That is not dead which can eternal lie, my friend

[@foadrightnow5725]

I don't know a damn thing about H.P. Lovecraft or his work, but I have to say, those are some absolutely brilliant lyrics! You, sir, are, without a doubt, a very talented and uniquely clever fellow! Thanks for sharing!

[@Shapes_Quality_Control]

The lyrics are HP Lovecraft’s poem “Nemesis.”

[@landhawk3706]

These lyrics are still somehow less gloomy than the real ones.

[@MiraLove]

LandHawk that's because Piano Man is about horrors that CAN happen to you

[@nostalgicmodernist1399]

This is weirdly sublime and moving. Thank you.

[@bimproctor7019]

This is unceasingly fantastic. I can already feel my sanity eroding. I welcome it.

[@bimproctor7019]

Well hello past self. I see you.

[@bimproctor7019]

Hello once more.

[@bimproctor7019]

Yo.

[@bimproctor7019]

And here I am again.

[@bimproctor7019]

I really must stop.

[@Dwatthaell]

Damn, Julian... you actually sound like Billy Joel singing this... epic :)

[@TomboyRespector]

This masterpiece was made before AI song making took off. Let that sink in.

[@isnotmimi]

What does this mean? People made well performed funny songs before AI, it's not that surprising, am I missing something?

[@frederickburton3440]

When I wore non-euclidean cloooooooothes.

[@RememberTheDead]

I always come back to this absolute masterwork. The sheer gusto in the delivery of "Ooooh GREAT was the sin of my spirit! And great is the reach of its doooooom!" sends me every time.

[@CandyManCriminal]

i've been listening to this almost constantly for 2 days i think i have a problem its so well done i dont even mind the few small mistakes but im sure they've been pointed out, so i wont bother dat smooth buttery voice

[@JulianVelard1]

Sorry I've made you sick

[@CandyManCriminal]

its okay, its my favorite disease

[@CandyManCriminal]

still listening to this daily

[@BillChmura]

This is amazing. I can't read the poem anymore without hearing this song in the background.

[@youdontgettoknow139]

Are you capable of doing David Bowie? Because Cassilda's Song, from The King in Yellow, is as natural a fit for Starman as Nemesis was for Piano Man.

[@SinisterGerbils]

Instructions unclear, my tentacles got stuck in a ceiling fan.

[@wolframironside5858]

Sounds painful. I hope they have been untangled by now.

[@SuperSpyKindaGuy]

Your voice brings a smile to my face very time, and I am about 76.4 % sure your albums made my grandfathers cancer go into remission. Thanks for that.

[@Atreus21]

I guess he's too old now, but I sure wish Billy Joel would honor this with his own interpretation.

[@s4d653]

I've been listening to this song for seven days at a volume a little above acceptable and this is making my neighbors act strangely. They always have a huge smile on their face and at the same time a slight look of concern. Sao Paulo, 06/13/2022

[@milkwater1204]

this is utterly incomprehensible and indescribable

[@davidcross9811]

Milkwater just like an eldritch abomination

[@dangerjoe8911]

This, indeed, is an aid in memorizing nemesis

[@Phaota]

That was just awesome. It's amazing the old poem fits so perfectly with Joel's classic tune.

[@slugfly]

A whole album of this would be fucking amazing!

[@sagedelphin9488]

This still rings sweet in ears uncounted. Thank you for your art.

[@House_of_Caine]

Not sure why, but I always break into tears by the last line of the last verse

[@skovner]

I believe this song will survive strange aeons and never die

[@margaretoxley4720]

Heard this on CBC Jan. 23rd...fabulous!

[@jrynedanielson]

This is so awesome. AND, it's well done. Put this somewhere I can buy it.

[@danfelder8062]

I would absolutely buy this for my iPhone

[@dscarmon]

Same here

[@AmberLecuyer]

Yes!

[@timothygerolami1548]

The cleverest part is he sounds more like Neil Diamond covering Joel than Joel after an HPL binge, which is the real horror of it all.

[@JulianVelard1]

Ha ha love this comment!

[@timothygerolami1548]

It's amazing work, thank you for making it and for taking my comment in the spirit intended. I may also be hoping for a follow up in the spirit of Neil Diamond. ;)

[@abxer3p]

I thought of Neil Diamond, also - very similar. :-)

[@matravnos]

Thank you. I needed this in my life.

[@benjamincliff9033]

This man is a hero. Not the hero we deserved, but the hero we needed.

[@NewWakfuFan]

To Police the Artist is to Maim the Sublime

[@MrKaepora]

Even Cthulhu is happy.

[@FriendlyArchpriest]

Funny how nowhere says that "Ol' C" wants to kill us... he wants us to brainlessly fuck and fight till' we die... (Acording to Call of Cthulhu)

[@Shapes_Quality_Control]

@@FriendlyArchpriest “At the Mountains of Madness” and “Shadow over Innsmouth” seem to suggest Cthulhu regards humanity as some sick joke and would indeed wipe us out in favor of creatures like the Dagon.

[@blu3c3lt]

This is wonderful. Well done good sir. Brilliant.

[@debbystardust]

His writing still shines in this format. All hail a founder of science fiction who never was honored fully in life, Lovecraft

[@MrJrHope]

This is truly awenspiring. I love hearing familliar tones to different lyrics and this was a great find!

[@kylebean2578]

Absolutely incredible. I have long been a fan of both Billy Joel and H.P. Lovecraft, and you combine their works beautifully. Well done. My one complaint is that you removed two of my favorite line from the poem to keep it matched to the tune. But, all is well that ends well. Great job.

[@eleanorehowe8140]

This is genuinely fantastic, even as a standalone song!

[@larrylovehandle8472]

This is the best version, awesome.

[@robertdochter277]

These lyrics remind me of the scene from Doctor Strange, where Stephen is sent careening aimlessly through the various dimensions in awestruck terror!

[@bruceshark5501]

This is incredible.... Gonna hafta memorize this.....

[@marshmallowbudgie]

two New England classics, together at last

[@amandagrace3588]

ZOMG. This is GREAT. It’s like you spied on my childhood!

[@ObscureLego]

So, Jokull is Icelandic for Glacier. So it is pronounced "yo-kull"

[@PavarottiAardvark]

This song is the reason I want my next D&D character to be an Ithilid Bard...

[@paperbullet1945]

Great Old One warlock multiclass

[@AvatarNaty]

Thro’ the ghoul-guarded gateways of slumber, Past the wan-moon’d abysses of night, I have liv’d o’er my lives without number, I have sounded all things with my sight; And I struggle and shriek ere the daybreak, being driven to madness with fright. I have whirl’d with the earth at the dawning, When the sky was a vaporous flame; I have seen the dark universe yawning, Where the black planets roll without aim; Where they roll in their horror unheeded, without knowledge or lustre or name. I had drifted o’er seas without ending, Under sinister grey-clouded skies That the many-fork’d lightning is rending, That resound with hysterical cries; With the moans of invisible daemons that out of the green waters rise. I have plung’d like a deer thro’ the arches Of the hoary primordial grove, Where the oaks feel the presence that marches And stalks on where no spirit dares rove; And I flee from a thing that surrounds me, and leers thro’ dead branches above. I have stumbled by cave-ridden mountains That rise barren and bleak from the plain, I have drunk of the fog-foetid fountains That ooze down to the marsh and the main; And in hot cursed tarns I have seen things I care not to gaze on again. I have scann’d the vast ivy-clad palace, I have trod its untenanted hall, Where the moon writhing up from the valleys Shews the tapestried things on the wall; Strange figures discordantly woven, which I cannot endure to recall. I have peer’d from the casement in wonder At the mouldering meadows around, At the many-roof’d village laid under The curse of a grave-girdled ground; And from rows of white urn-carven marble I listen intently for sound. I have haunted the tombs of the ages, I have flown on the pinions of fear Where the smoke-belching Erebus rages, Where the jokulls loom snow-clad and drear: And in realms where the sun of the desert consumes what it never can cheer. I was old when the Pharaohs first mounted The jewel-deck’d throne by the Nile; I was old in those epochs uncounted When I, and I only, was vile; And Man, yet untainted and happy, dwelt in bliss on the far Arctic isle. Oh, great was the sin of my spirit, And great is the reach of its doom; Not the pity of Heaven can cheer it, Nor can respite be found in the tomb: Down the infinite aeons come beating the wings of unmerciful gloom. Thro’ the ghoul-guarded gateways of slumber, Past the wan-moon’d abysses of night, I have liv’d o’er my lives without number, I have sounded all things with my sight; And I struggle and shriek ere the daybreak, being driven to madness with fright.

[@ArtistLisaM]

I was looking for a Cthulu reference while working on some gift art for a friend, somehow stumbled onto this... And I am SO happy I did.

[@trash.videos1573]

Holy shit this is amazing. Thank you for this blessing!

[@kot23]

Wonderful, it got stuck in my mind since the first time I've heard it. It is amazing how well it fits, not only the tempo and words, but the weirdly merry feeling of the song to Lovecraft's haunted text. Respect! Could be used as music/voice over in a mythos film...

[@stevenmewett4489]

This is all kinds of amazing. Great work!

[@cjtuthill]

Thank you for brightening my day. This is brilliant!

[@xahpookx]

this is incredible

[@racheljarrett8275]

A genuinely beautiful song about unspeakable horrors and insanity 🐙 10/10

[@CrashKinkaide]

Glorious. Absolutely perfect in every way.

[@discojoe3]

Well... this is the best thing ever.

[@mrredeef]

Fully captured everything that drew me to lovecraft in this one song.

[@OsirisFour]

Still the best recitation of Nemesis I've heard.

[@headcase31780]

I am in love with this

[@ilovemuffins1337]

Fantastic. I think this is my 20th listen

[@art2liv4]

In first and best with this mash-up, your benighted soul was already more than halfway there, Piano Man! I hope Billy Joel himself adopts these lyrics.

[@SoysteinMD]

Your voice is like smooth butter.

[@JulianVelard1]

Buttah!

[@Remimi_in_prison]

that's the most disgusting way to complement someones voice

[@al_ivory6682]

I love this and that in this version they stuck with the piano playing

[@danfelder8062]

This is objectively wonderful.

[@houdiniweenie69]

I can't stop listening to this. It sounds so good!

[@Tadesan]

This is very very impressive. I'm so grateful to have found this!

[@skovner]

I give this an irrational number of tentacles up!

[@dahuterschuter]

Why is it so beautiful

[@lisafleury1254]

Your version is my favourite so far. Well done

[@DavidLiamStone]

Thanks this is just rinky dinky! Made my day! Or my unspeakable aeon!

[@ashthefreeman]

This was amazing. You are amazing.

[@estoy1001]

These keep popping up.. oh well, all the spawn, sing along: Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn Iä, Iä, Shub-Niggurath, IÄ! Yog Sothoth lll’nglui wgah’n... C’MON, EVERYBODY, YOU KNOW THE WORDS! SING ALONG!!!!!