Half in the Bag: Moonfall

In this latest episode of the post mortem movie show, Jay and Mike take a look at one of the biggest bombs in movie history: MOONFALL! From the director of a bunch of other movies that somehow were popular and successful despite being equally terrible to MOONFALL! Thanks, Roland Emmerich! Your works of art will live on for generations of idiots to come.

[@bravediomedes217]

I can’t wait for Roland Emmerich’s “Flat Earth”, where the ice barrier melts and everything starts sliding off the side.

[@shadesofrevolution]

This actually sounds fun

[@rhetiq9989]

Nah he wouldn't transition into making real life documentaries

[@kellymoses8566]

That could actually be very entertaining

[@PhantomFelix211164]

@@grandspringdale1564 He is tasked with defending the two last straight frogs on earth

[@sn1pertoaster]

this is a scarily plausible concept

[@NotchEvident]

When Mike talks about Star Trek the dementia doesn't seem as noticeable.

[@michaeloftaoism]

and we are "blessed" with all of the "benefits"

[@benjaminsantiagosstuff]

It’s like that video where they play music from an old dude with alzheimer’s past and he lights up and starts talking.

[@NotchEvident]

@@ManwithaCat He's making as many episodes as he can to take care of his family!

[@Grogeous_Maximus]

That's because his brain is practically rotted out from B-movies and booze. Now only Star Trek bits of it remain. And for that, we are all truly grateful.

[@PieAndChips]

When Mike talks about Star Trek my dog barks.

[@TehCream]

“The AI suddenly became self aware” is almost as great a line as “somehow Palpatine returned”

[@chacecrowell3638]

When they remake the sequel trilogy I really hope Steven does that line instead of Marc haha

[@nezfromhki]

I was thinking the same exact thing!

[@pojo7705]

it has the same energy as "Then everything changed when the fire nation attacked." but is delivered by a child and makes way less scene.

[@pojo7705]

@Banni chill, I meant the line in the opening, it's kinda sudden if you picked up past the first episode, but it's a better line in a better show. I guess I should say they are going for the same vibe

[@believeinjesus6972]

Repent to Jesus Christ “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another-and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” ‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭10:24-25‬ ‭NIV‬‬ J

[@huyphan7825]

If an EMP is strong enough to hurt a person then at that point it's no longer an EMP, IT'S CALLED GETTING FUCKING ELECTROCUTED

[@xmlthegreat]

Or pointing the magnetron of a microwave at someone.

[@icemachine79]

I think she just pulled out the wrong prop, and nobody noticed except the FX artist. It's not like anyone working on that show knows the difference between a tricorder and a phaser.

[@steverogers7601]

Hey guys, what’s EMP? Can someone spend a couple seconds explaining what EMP is for me because I need to be told what EMP stands for and what EMP means. /s

[@uuuueber]

@@steverogers7601 emotionally mislead persons

[@Wiley97]

@@steverogers7601 Electro magnetic pulse, think of it like a bomb for electronics

[@hoyaguru7509]

How did they not mention the absolute best scene in the whole movie? The people on the ground are running from the Moon, it is just about scraping the Earth, and the Moon's gravity is pulling everything up. They are running towards a wooden shed, to get inside, because that will save them. Right before they get inside, the little boy is pulled up into the air by the Moon's gravity, and someone grabs him, and pulls him inside the shed. As he gets inside the shed, he falls to the ground. The wooden shed blocked the Moon's gravity. Watch it again, I spit potato chips across the room I was laughing so hard. Who knew that wood could cancel gravity?

[@AIIEYESONME]

IT's like that scene from Independence Day, where the fire is swallowing everything in the tunnel, and everyone's favorite pet Retriever is running in front of the all encompassing Hollywood fireball. Then that Black Women pulls the Retriever safely inside a service tunnel in the nick of time and the fireball ( combusting all oxygen in the tunnel) inexplicably passes safely on by the dog and Women seemingly bc they are a couple feet inside the door. That's not how fire works, that's not how physics work (that's not how ANYOFTHISWORKS!) cheesy Hollywood hack.. Lol

[@RoganGunn]

Wood absolutely can cancel gravity. My wooden shelf holds all my junk despite the gravity of the entire Earth pulling it down, and the moon has only 1/6th the gravity of the Earth, so... Oops, I forgot to put "Well, ackshually..." at the beginning. 😜 In all seriousness, the scientific accuracy in this movie, in fact all Roland Emmerich's movies, makes Star Wars look like a documentary. 🙄 I mean a white dwarf _inside the moon?!_ How did it get there without anyone noticing? It would have more gravitational pull than the sun! Not to mention white dwarfs shrink when their mass increases, so one small enough to fit inside the moon would likely be beyond it's Chandrasekhar Limit (~1.4 solar masses), and would immediately explode in a Type 1a supernova. Also if the moon approaches Earth too close, when it hits the Roche Limit it would be torn up by Earth's gravity and become a ring system. Not before superheating the atmosphere with all the debris that does impact the Earth, so we'd all be cooked way before it _scraped_ the Earth... 🤓 Kurzgesagt already made a video about this unlikely scenario. So this is the first blockbuster movie to be ripped off of a KZbin video, and it still managed to get it wrong.

[@Mauther]

Gravity, like fire, can't pass through a door. It's not a ghost, stupid. Come on!

[@KaiserMattTygore927]

That shed was made out of a wood-like nanobot material, each bot is equipped with "Counter Gravity" Core generators created by the super-mega-hype advanced humans.

[@KaiserMattTygore927]

@@Mauther Aliens also can't get through doors, the Moon's gravity is alien to Earth, so it checks out.

[@ftvdeadmark]

When Patrick Wilson’s child was explaining Artificial intelligence, I thought it was a Neil Breen film for a second. Bravo, Mr. Emmerich.

[@jayclean5653]

I thought for sure that they were going to hard cut to Breen saying that exact same line of dialog.

[@countgeekula9143]

Haha... Yes! 🤣 👍

[@paperbagman8913]

Wait so for a split second you forgot you paid for a ticket to see moonfall and just assumed you were watching a different movie? Because you might have dementia

[@ftvdeadmark]

@@paperbagman8913 I have great memory, I’ll have you know! I still remember fondly Yoda’s little butt dance in front of Luke from TLJ.

[@erikhulthen8662]

If only.

[@shelbyvillerules9962]

This movie was so ridiculous that when John Bradley’s character was in that simulated construct at the end and saw his cat, I _legitimately_ thought the cat was going to talk.

[@JesseCuster]

That would have made the movie better.

[@hughejass9461]

The fact that the moon hits the Earth and people survive by hiding in buildings is so frigging hysterical they should give Emmerich an Academy Award, presented by Will Smith.

[@THEremiXFACTOR]

"Welcome to Earff"

[@paulnicholson5997]

Perfect

[@nosuchthing8]

TBH, the moon never made contact with earth. It was about 100 miles up.

[@Grogeous_Maximus]

Give him an award, followed by a slap.

[@barahng]

The fact that *anyone* is alive or Earth even exists when there's a fucking STAR (inside the Moon) about 400 times closer to Earth than the Sun is is even more ridiculous. A white dwarf isn't as luminous as a star like the Sun but its still really massive.

[@antonioortizburciaga1158]

I love how Mike calls not-Nick Frost "not-Simon Pegg"

[@jamesbaxter9150]

I think both "Frost" and "Pegg" got stuck in the transporter at the same time a la "Tuvix" ST VOYAGER

[@emeritus666]

@@jamesbaxter9150 so, Frogg?

[@Havokwreaker]

@@emeritus666 Simick Frogg

[@souler__]

Sick Pest

[@AxeMan808]

I still don't know the actual name of that not-Ed Harris guy in Avatar.

[@PatTheBatmanFan]

Congrats to Mike on his successful, calm deflection of Jay’s “Ghosts aren’t real” comment.

[@DmitryChmelyov]

He almost instantly started talking about Star Trek! It was his revenge!

[@ds90seph]

@@DmitryChmelyov One might say... The Revenge of Khan...? I'll see myself out

[@Hemostat]

That was like a direct attack; I was so scared for Jay's safety

[@jaredarmstrong7403]

@@Hemostat Don’t worry, Mike will sic some Ghoooosts on Jay through his copy of the Necronomic he stole from a yard sale.

[@MonkeyspankO]

Lack of awareness does not constitute a deflection

[@John_Smith_Dumfugg]

I respect and appreciate how Mike calls the things that Disney puts out "products" instead of movies

[@frankmerker630]

The new Disney product as advertised during the Academy Awards’ “Best Animated Feature” segment

[@f.d.3289]

well, that's what they are, like pretty much every hollywood blockbuster for the past 20 years

[@niqaily4415]

respect and appreciate

[@anthonyprolo]

@@frankmerker630 I was really bummed that The Mitchells vs. The Machines lost to Encanto. I thought Encanto was just so generic where Mitchells was a really thought out script.

[@hssIceland]

Why?

[@akaBoG]

My mother who passed in 2021 would have loved this movie. She used to make my dad watch all the worst shark movies and then she'd have him "fast forward past the boring parts." Basically she just liked watching the shark attacks.

[@TheJas20]

My mom loves bad movies too. Except she just doesn't know they're bad movies. She just loves stuff like moonfall, the meg and total rampage. I'm sorry for your loss.

[@akaBoG]

@@TheJas20 Love it! And thank you, I appreciate the kind thoughts!

[@sir0nion]

Did your parents watch Shark Exorcist together?

[@akaBoG]

@@sir0nion I'll have to ask my pops.

[@invader_jim2837]

She sounded like a damn fine woman.

[@lacafia172]

Redlettermedia has become my window into the dark side of cinema. Moonfall, Bruce Willis movies, literally every new Star Trek show. The canaries in the coalmines. They watch these so we don't have to.

[@alrightythen84]

Seriously. RLM has saved me countless hours of time so I don't waste it on having to watch terrible movies and TV shows.

[@docbones213]

Indeed.

[@djangofett4879]

yeah, i also used to watch Nostalgia Critic and now am embarrassed of that fact.

[@larrylaffer3246]

They really do watch horrible movies and shows so we don't have to. Especially Rich. Poor, poor Rich.

[@Jose-se9pu]

That sounds oddly similar to the Nostalgia Critic motto...kids, remember the Nostalgia Critic? He was relevant like...10 years ago.

[@fonkyfesh]

Roland emmerich should do a nuclear holocaust movie where an estranged family is outrunning every fucking nuclear missile on earth in an SUV

[@f.d.3289]

or they have to outrun will smith in an SUV

[@stefanmarinkovic1229]

Suv? why need that when you can just jog away

[@stefanmarinkovic1229]

Suv? why need that when you can just jog away

[@f.d.3289]

@@stefanmarinkovic1229 Nah, jogging is for POOR people, but WINNERs drive STUPID UNWIELDY VEHICLES

[@GoldenfoxxPrime]

I'd absolutely pay to see nuclear missiles in SUVs.

[@target555]

I like the bit where the moon is destroying New York and is literally a mile from the earth. And that guy was like “my wife can still stop this”

[@sydneycastelfan]

it was like Roland Emmerich made a parody of his own movies and I loved every second of it. Someone said with a straight face “We scanned your consciousness; you’re part of the moon now.”. It was amazing.

[@jamiestewart3694]

In Roland emmerichs mind there's literally no disaster you can't outrun with the possible exception of his career

[@venuecam]

Underrated comment.

[@hayaisaru]

Wow, perfect analogy.

[@joereno955]

Man I'd kill to have my career "fail" like Roland Emmerich. Most of his movies suck but they've grossed billions of dollars

[@gwfranklin1]

@@joereno955 yeah the guys filthy rich lmao

[@darwincity]

I'd love to have a disaster career where you can still command $150 Million budgets to produce crap.

[@xuxuang8574]

Roland Emmerich: the only director who can direct a film that is simultaneously it's own mockbuster.

[@A_YouTube_Commenter]

That is perfect!🤌

[@KaiserMattTygore927]

I thought this when they brought up mooncrash, like, can you really make a mockbuster of a film that's not even blockbuster??

[@nicolasmontes7207]

See: Blubberella

[@devinfaux6987]

I dunno, I kinda got the same feeling from 2018's "The Predator," complete with sequel-bait at the end.

[@xuxuang8574]

@Ivan Zhao like what kind of subversive messaging?

[@isaacswarts6826]

Roland Emmerich is just chasing that Stargate dragon. After he sold Stargate he realized the potential for it and he’s been chasing a franchise ever since.

[@Durdles26]

As someone living in china, my wife and I have noticed that for the past year or two there’s been almost no foreign movies in theaters. not even marvel movies such as Spider-Man which are usually really popular. This is merely speculation but I believe the government here is trying to lessen “foreign influence” because foreign holidays and other such things are becoming taboo, not outright banned but discouraged. So there’s a guess as to why there’s no box office for this movie in China.

[@supermot34]

Good!

[@jac4026]

@@supermot34 which part of that was good?

[@supermot34]

@@jac4026 The part where western filmmakers won't have to make their movies worse to pander to the Chinese market. RLM once did a joke where Mike calls up China and asks them to stop watching our movies because it's making us make bad movies.

[@guccifer764]

@@jac4026 The part where the chinese audience stops ruining our movies. They already make enough shitty movies on their own, no meed to spread their shit to us.

[@luiginastro8831]

@@supermot34 It was an old Half in the Bag, they talked about Edge of Tomorrow, Deliver Us from Evil and Transformers 4. The joke was specifically aimed at the latter, for obvious reasons.

[@jeffbow2347]

mike desperately trying to convey how large the sun is to jay is amazing to me

[@simopen]

he sounded like a disappointed parent. Our yellow, middle aged Son

[@vrika4280]

Bigger than the moon?😮

[@shawnspencer8157]

@@vrika4280 like alot bigger bigger than the death star

[@bearded_snorlax]

I can tell you as someone working at a movie theater, old people fucking loved this movie. Couldn't get enough of it.

[@SniperZaku]

Someone needs to do a study in this. My dad, who is in his 70s, fucking love big dumb disaster movies.

[@hithertounknown1989]

@@SniperZaku maybe because all the CGI is still a novelty to them?

[@hithertounknown1989]

please define old, wanna know if I am in the "old" demographic now

[@Jose-se9pu]

Define "old"...average KZbin user is like 25...

[@bearded_snorlax]

@@SniperZaku It's always disaster movies and "Olympus Has Fallen" style action movies. Big time dad movies

[@RevolverRez]

I can see it now: Emmerich's next movie will feature a black hole heading for Earth that will be defeated by a divorced scientist who through the aid of Dominos Pizza will outsmart the evil aliens who sent it and get back with his former wife while her new husband sacrifices himself to the black hole which harmlessly flys into the sun, which as we all know will burn black holes to a crisp and oh no I have brain damage now

[@alphatrion4365]

Stop giving them ideas.

[@ComradeKits]

I love that Mike misremembered the line "Our friends at Space-X" as "Our friends at China" lmao

[@kellydavis3219]

Rolland officially upgraded from "you can outrun cold" to "you can outrun fucking gravity"

[@spillanegottleib1681]

side-graded

[@KaiserMattTygore927]

Humans Stronk 💪

[@TheRhinehart86]

His depiction of gravity was entirely wrong. The Earth is way more massive than the moon, it doesn't matter how close the moon gets, it will never be enough to overcome the Earth's gravity. It's like saying a VW Beetle could pull a fully laden 18 wheeler semi-trailer truck as long as the Beetle used a short cable.

[@meatpuppet5036]

Well yeah, I mean gravity only propagates at what, speed of light maybe? easy peasy.

[@FloraJoannaK]

I've seen people run away from their own body odour. Try, anyways.

[@ArthurSchoppenweghauer]

Rich Evans must always be credited, even when he's not in the video.

[@timothyhiggins8934]

agreed. that laugh is as infectious as the plague

[@jedi4049]

Rich Evans should be in every video

[@jonathanmartinez5050]

Rich Evens may not be in every video, but he is always in our hearts

[@rarajke]

You must have turned the video off before the final iine of the video, where in the unexpected plot twist Mike reveals that he was, in fact, Rich all along.

[@SamuelCatsy]

Rich would've pointed out yet another thing doing the "Killer robots from an advanced civilization reminiscent of Mass Effect" like he did with Picard.

[@dawesome_sauce]

The best part of this video is Mike giving Jay an astronomy lesson on stars. Mike is totally getting into it, and Jay just wants his life to be over.

[@emperormarcusaureliusanton5995]

Roland Emmerich: the only Hollywood director who would unironically make Tug Speedman's Scorcher series. Only this time, it's different.

[@WTFisTingispingis]

Who left the fridge open?

[@shelbyvillerules9962]

Here we go again… _again_

[@ShadowJester88]

Astronauts would definitely chit-chat on a spacewalk. They're notoriously chill, you see there's no pressure in space.

[@bigjohnsbreakfastlog5819]

I, too, remember Gravity and how casual they were doing everything.

[@killianjones4970]

There it is! That's how you pun, baybayyy!

[@TheGuruStud]

get out

[@Sky_Guy]

I know it's a joke, but holy shit it annoys me to no end how disrespectful every single portrayal of NASA people are in any form of media. Have you ever listened to real astronauts? They're fucking immovable, professional, and cool as a cucumber. The audio from Apollo 13's disaster is incredible; they're calmer about their O2 tank exploding than most people are when their pop tart's too hot. They're absolutely not casual and careless like movies make them out to be, and it's so upsetting to see pioneers of the modern age be portrayed as such.

[@aarondavis8943]

@@Sky_Guy But they do chit chat. Of course they do; some of the EVAs are 10 hours duration. It doesn't interfere with important comms because, like you say, they know their shit inside out. They're portrayed poorly because the target audience are rubes who hate science and "elitists" and therefore have to be fed such things with the honey of base populism. (astronauts aren't elitists, they'd live in a cardboard box if it meant going to space some time) The difference in the portrayal of the astronauts compared to the miners in "Armageddon" is the perfect example of this phenomenon.

[@morganwhaley9119]

"The moon is rising! Gravity is going to go crazy!" Gravity can only effect you if the object who causes the gravitational field is in sight, obviously.

[@scfm1684]

If you don't move the gravity can't see you.

[@andrewcz8871]

That explains common logic.

[@die1mayer]

To be fair to Emmerich, the position of the body does have an effect, like in moon phases.

[@pecztery]

That's why Wile E. Coyote isn't affected by gravity until he looks down.

[@Lunar_Sovereign]

duh. that's why i have to strap myself down whenever i sleep so i don't float away.

[@putz5872]

My favourite portrayal of China reacting to a crisis is in Arrival. The whole time they threaten to just blow up the aliens and they’re the first ones to cut ties to the program trying to communicate with them.

[@abelq8008]

It's part of the "One Galaxy" policy.

[@kylitoooooo]

@@abelq8008 not enough recognition

[@antduude]

Roland Emmerich, The man who never passes up an opportunity to insult the audience's intelligence.

[@ceobigtg9748]

Almost 10 years in still as funny as the day I started watching. Best movie review channel on KZbin no question

[@neutraltoxic]

RLM is the best justification for KZbin's existence

[@vivachubs]

*best channel on KZbin

[@kissaninja9700]

Actually good content on KZbin.

[@Woozlewuzzleable]

I would argue best KZbin channel, also they do more than just movie reviews.

[@HbMbyKys]

Yep they havent improved even a bit lol jk

[@PhillyWild302]

Roland Emmerich really did the Mass Effect 3 ending with the star child exposition dump because we all know how well THAT was received. 😂

[@jackkingsby116]

I liked this post because I played Mass Effect 2, but I've never beat it or played the other games. I just don't want anyone to claim I'm a poser.

[@CarlEusebius]

And Not Simon Pegg chose blue.

[@walternelson2687]

Never played it. Which color ending was that?

[@DeltaD36]

I'm STILL mad.

[@zairman]

Except it wasn't really a star child. It was an AI construct that just happened to look like the same kid Shepard saw. Which I still think was in Shepard's head, no matter what Bioware says. Was still 100x better than this movie.

[@barahng]

21:57 How cool to see an Isaac Arthur clip on RLM. That TNG Dyson sphere episode is actually not what Freeman Dyson imagined, the original idea was a system of independently orbiting habitats and solar collectors, which he called a "shell", presumably the name was inspired by an atom's electron shell, not a literal solid shell like an egg shell. It wouldn't be one massive single structure, which probably wouldn't be possible even with hypothetical future super materials, unless you used active support. The actual Dyson swarm/shell concept is actually doable with today's technology. Enormously expensive and a building project with a scale humanity has never attempted before, even *one* long term orbital would be, but still technically possible. Realistically it wouldn't be feasible until we have better automation, it's not gonna be dudes in spacesuits with hammers constructing them. Also, I highly recommend Isaac Arthur to any fan of scifi/speculative futurism.

[@Malkovith2]

I always enjoy when Mike goes full space nerd mode

[@BigTylt]

If you wanted to build a futuristic solid Dyson sphere around an entire solar system, you'd need to mine dozens of solar systems to even meet the required amount of material. If you can do that, you are already essentially God.

[@barahng]

@@BigTylt Totally solid dyson spheres are kind of just a scifi meme. Not only materially and structurally unfeasible compared to a swarm but you lose the utility of having the individual habitats be able to move around relative to each other. Anyways IIRC Isaac also has a video where he maths out roughly how many Oneil cylinder size habitats could be built if we deconstructed the entire solar system, the number was in the BILLIONS Earth's mass converted into habitats would yield literally millions of times the living area because most of Earth's mass is "wasted" providing gravity. Whereas an orbital only needs a few meters of earth/ice in its shell to protect from radiation, and the gravity is from rotating. Basically human populations will be in the quadrillions before we start worrying about running out living area. Ill try to find that video and report back.

[@barahng]

@@BigTylt In true Isaac Arthur fashion the video is called "Let's Dismantle the Solar System!"

[@JG-zs8tr]

Can we get a spinoff series where Mike explains basic cosmology while Jay pretends to listen?

[@MrNotJoker]

I love Mike choosing to ignore Jay roasting him for believing in ghosts

[@krenwregget7667]

hahaha, yup. Steam-rolled right over it.

[@fiddledotgoth]

I can't believe they still think the moon landings were real...

[@fonkyfesh]

Rolled off like a dunked pinball

[@TaylorOwens117]

Mike: Remembers the most obscure Star Trek references and technology. Also Mike: “Google Alexa”

[@johnnymittle]

Scotty's appearance in TNG is memorable.

[@TheSH1N1GAM1]

@@johnnymittle As soon as they said Dyson Sphere I knew that episode was going to be mentioned.

[@aguilacahc000]

Hahaha

[@Fordddyyy]

It's depressing to me that there are people who would notice this. No offense, they're just all the same.

[@bretsheeley4034]

His brain has proper priorities in regards to what's more important.

[@aurona]

I loved showing Emmerich films to my son when he was a kid and telling him the science was totally legit and could happen. Sadly once he hit 10 it no longer worked.

[@mitchell2491]

Neil Breen should sue for plagiarism for that line, "AI: Artificial Intelligence."

[@natelax1367]

I can’t believe Big Tuna hasn’t made him the spokesperson yet. They are missing out on tens of purchases

[@all-in-eye5646]

he would have but now that he's a humanoid he's above that.

[@aarondavis8943]

WE'RE ON THE VERGE OF MIND HACKING!

[@Fiery891]

"It was before he died, not after" In the Age of CGI it is good you clarify that.

[@yam83]

You mean AI deepfake CGI

[@JM-mh1pp]

Very soon actors will start to sign post mortem contracts

[@TerrenceNowicki]

It was before he died, unlike his appearance in "Through Doohan's Eyes."

[@irishboy_pa]

I thought it was dumb he explained it. But yeah or he could died and movie came out after. I rather see him sing with Tupac lol

[@MegaFriendlyCreeper]

This is why I love RLM. You have movies like X, The Batman, Everything Everywhere All At Once, and more that are out, and they chose to do a video on a Roland Emmerich movie that came out months ago.

[@charlottecorday8494]

Everything Everywhere All At Once looks like the most pretentious, navel gazing, insufferable, feel good smaltz nightmare of ALL TIME. It's probably a good movie and nothing like that, but those trailers gave me eye cancer.

[@zyncra3965]

@@charlottecorday8494 it's pretty good. Not my personal kind of movie but it was good

[@MegaFriendlyCreeper]

@@charlottecorday8494 Its a little schmaltzy at the end, but incredibly complex and original. I'd recommend it.

[@evilemperordude]

You have to admit a review of Moonfall is probably going to be the most entertaining out of those.

[@Jose-se9pu]

Because it just came out on digital. They just dont care about going to movie theathers anymore (as most people since the pandemic)

[@tomikankaanpaa3528]

It's comforting to know that it's possible to outrun anything. In a Roland Emmerich movie the RLM cast could outrun Mike forcing them to watch black spines.

[@Kermitron]

The real tragedy of Moonfall in my opinion is that Ron Howard was apparently on board to direct an adaptation of the Neal Stephenson novel Seveneves. The catalyst for the story is the moon breaking up and raining down on the planet, which is expected to systematically devastate earth for 5,000 years. The novel explores humanity preparing for and responding to that crisis - so while it’s a completely different story, the concept is close enough that Ron Howard’s Seveneves will probably never get made and we get this Emmerich piece of shit instead.

[@ninjaturtlefan2003]

Man that sounds way more interesting and thoughtful

[@Kermitron]

@@ninjaturtlefan2003 the first half of the book is packed with some really great sci fi ideas. The second half of the book is… a lot less great. Stephenson doesn’t do endings well. He just sorta keeps writing and then things just stop.

[@seanfager8063]

Well...hopefully we'll still get a SnowCrash in the next few years?

[@abelq8008]

Hopefully the end of the movie is just a short epilog. Idk I loved Seveneves 😍

[@atomcraft4067]

I love Neal Stephenson and I completely agree he doesn't know how to wrap it up. I've read The Baroque Cycle, Diamond Age, Reamde and Anathem. I've lost count of how many times I've tried to read Cryptonomicon and lose interest. I would love to see an adaptation of The Baroque Cycle but that would be pretty ambitious.

[@bretsheeley4034]

"There's a white dwarf in the moon." I think the Earth (and the other planets... and the sun) would already be having gravitation issues then even before the moon started to move.

[@lookoutforchris]

It's always about race with you people.

[@cosmoscenti5173]

If it's a Dyson Sphere designed by some super advanced species with control over gravity I'd see that as the least concerning thing

[@Barnesofthenorth]

And a white dwarf that small doesn't exist because it would instead collapse in on itself to become a black hole.

[@yskim8616]

I didn't realize Peter Dinklage was in the moon

[@joeSCHMOEwithTheo]

yeah the moons gravitational force somehow increases exponentially because it has a white dwarf inside it, but it always had that white dwarf and they would have noticed that by now.

[@ihategoo8907]

If they poorly Photoshopped the moon’s face from Majora’s Mask I would maybe see Moonfall

[@videogamenostalgia]

If they expertly photoshopped Rich Evans’ laughing face onto the moon then I would absolutely see Moonfall

[@quintonbyrd9902]

The most upsetting part of this is that Nicholas cage is not in it despite him being a better casting for every single role in a movie like this

[@GioTheVax]

Desperately hoping that Hellstar Remina one day gets adapted into something so we can hear Mike's takes on *that* kind of planet cataclysm

[@BuiltDownLogically]

I love how Jay edited in all of the technology computer noises when Mike is hammering away on the keyboard, but the second he does the same with the light controller, he's making all of his own sound effects with his mouth

[@gregtroll]

Fire up that dot matrix printer!!

[@haleymist09]

I know, it's cute.

[@VidZero]

I think it threw him for a loop when Mike started smashing the keyboard against the screen and keys started flying everywhere.

[@Scott_Silver]

You should have had Rich and Jack on this episode so they could talk about how the Moon falling into earth is literally the plot of The Legend of Zelda Majora’s Mask

[@gorvarhadgarson5227]

No timetravel tho...which is why this movie SUUUUUUCKS!

[@barbutahelmet8966]

and how the whole "subconscious kid exposition dumping" was nicked from ME3?

[@somedudeok1451]

Actually, I wouldn't put it past Roland Emmerich to literally put a giant face on the moon that reveals itself on the dark side of the moon as it turns around and crashes into earth grinning. I'm sure he'd at least contemplate it.

[@nathaniellindner313]

But before that, it was the plot to that episode of Pinky and the Brain where Brain becomes a teacher for disadvantaged inner-city youths in order to move the moon closer to the Earth, which would somehow let him take over the world, and of course to do a Dangerous Minds parody in the process. Much more enjoyable than watching Moonfall and also a lot quicker.

[@krenwregget7667]

@@barbutahelmet8966 EXACTLY.

[@anonymouspersona122]

It's amazing how far Mike's gone marketing "Top Hat Monkey goes West." What dedication to what was originally a passion project.

[@Moloch187]

Wouldn't it be easier for NASA to train astronauts how to drill rather than training drillers to be astronauts?

[@TakeNoteOfThat]

Drilling’s in your heart. In your blood. You gotta be able to feel it.

[@johnaylward2015]

Half of this is just Mike dunking even more on Star Trek: Picard and I'm here for that.

[@b14luar]

The EMP thing is great bc it would NOT knock out a person...but it does electronic equipment. So the only logical explanation for that scene is that the poor man had a pace-maker and they just fried it causing the man to go into cardiac arrest and, yes, effectively knocking him down...probably for good, since no one provides any medical aid.

[@notapplicable9243]

@@b14luar Even if an EMP did affect humans, I’m pretty sure it would still be lethal since brain activity and the heart run on electrical signals.

[@TheseBitchesWantNikes]

Mike's Prologue about Emmerich chasing ghosts is....haunting.

[@Corbomite_Meatballs]

This comment felt really spooky to me.

[@Jose-se9pu]

But true.

[@homoe7976]

Quick, get Zak Bagans on this!

[@nicolasmontes7207]

1:34 Thats what James and Maso said about Geostorm when it came out 5 years ago

[@Legolas75893]

mark fisher smiling

[@BT-su1yf]

If you watch closely, Mike basically snapped that keyboard in half with one smack on the computer monitor. Dude must be purely fueled by rage about Picard by now, to exhibit that much strength.

[@jacksmith5279]

did anybody else pick up on the ludicrous mode reference? it must be a nod to spaceballs

[@afkaz]

I love when Mike and Jay put more thought into these movies than the people who make them.

[@McLovinCW]

Sometimes Mike gets a look in his eye and I just know he's about to destroy something on that desk in a fit of madness.

[@Epicbiscuit2015]

That’s the look of a man who was not chosen by the Bozoputer

[@AlekWheeler]

So this movie broke the record set for most expensive independent film. The previous holder if you guys are curious, is K-19:the Widowmaker, starring Harrison Ford, Liam Neeson and directed by Oscar winner Katheryn Bigalow. Great submarine disaster movie, on par with Red October and Crimsom Tide.

[@shelbyvillerules9962]

Coincidentally Moonfall also stole a line of dialogue from Crimson Tide when one character says “God help you if you’re wrong” and the other guy says “If I’m wrong then God help us all”

[@timtheskeptic1147]

How dare you not put Down Periscope on that list.

[@GamesDiddley]

I paid to see this in the cinema on opening weekend, knowing full well what I was getting into. I came out with my abs and face hurting from laughing so much at just how fucking dumb it was. Absolutely brilliant.

[@andreasniedam9945]

I love the fact that Mike did not fail to mention James Doohan, the star of a little-known movie Through Dead Eyes.

[@reginaldsafety6090]

Did you get your copy signed before he passed away?

[@andreasniedam9945]

@@reginaldsafety6090 I send it to him, but unfortunately, he died right after that. It was really a weird coincidence. I wanted him to answer my question why he didn't appear in any other movies after that anymore. But I guess actors are just a very picky lot.

[@spillanegottleib1681]

"... of a little-known movie Through Dead Eyes." Little known?? It's the 2nd best known film in Rwanda!! (RLM callback)

[@preflex3502]

The Roche limit of the moon is 18,470 miles. At that point, the moon would break up and become a ring around the Earth.

[@Zothaqqua]

Also, there's that idea that because the moon is up in the sky, it's just waiting to fall down given the slightest nudge.

[@WontonTV]

I love how a $140M scifi plot could have been completely disassembled if they'd asked an Astronomy undergrad "so what do you think?". I mean uhhhhhhh--- the alien nanotechnology strengthened the moon's structure to keep it from breaking apart obviously. 🧐

[@banana_junior_9000]

You...I like you.

[@jeffreytroublefield4265]

For the "real" moon. Not the spaceship moon. Duh.... 😆

[@nosuchthing8]

Overtime, not immediately. Plus the moon IS breaking apart.

[@isaacarthurSFIA]

One day I'm going to have re-render that 'Rungworld' clip :) Nice episode

[@GalanThings]

Wow didn't expect you here Isaac

[@FandangoJon]

I would sell a kidney to see a "Isaac Arthur + Mike Stoklasa talk about nerd shit" collab. Pretty please???

[@isaacarthurSFIA]

@@GalanThings Old fan of the Star Wars & Trek movies reviews they did :)

[@redlightmax]

37:16 "But yeah, I watched the first 10 minutes of Moonfall, and then, 'cause it's an asylum movie..." I like how Jay confused the two movies.

[@bennparrish8556]

Honestly the biggest sin of Moonfall is when they misquote Spaceballs by calling it, "Ludicrous Mode" instead of "Ludicrous Speed"

[@strawberrylotlizard]

Are you for serious

[@AIIEYESONME]

@@strawberrylotlizard No, he's Benn Parrish!

[@codinghusky5196]

tbh, I don't believe it was a "misquote"; I think it was copyright evasion...

[@winged777]

He's referring to Tesla's Ludicrous Mode judging by the earlier Musk/SpaceX bits.

[@youtubeme7195]

"Moonfall" is Jack MacDevitt's most famous book. At first I was pissed at the outright thievery, but then I saw a bunch of scenes and realized that Jack likely just said, "I have nothing to do with this movie my name is nowhere near it." as he held his hands out and slowly backed away. the other 3 outright thefts are "Dahak" available on Baen free library, and Hammer of the Gods. Just because He did a shitty job of his theft doesn't mean he didn't steal all of it.

[@dirt410]

"Can someone tell me what I'm looking at here" is actually just the actor trying to find out what scene he's in.

[@ND-nr6mx]

"Can someone tell the audience what I'm looking at here"

[@dyslexicboogaloo]

“What’s all this churning and bubbling? You call that a radar?!” -Dark Helmet

[@fhujf]

Sounds like something out of a Bruce Willis movie.

[@CrazyChemistPL]

Shockingly, in 2019 Emmerich made Midway, which is not only one of the better war movies in recent times it is also shockingly accurate to actual events.

[@qweniverelefever62]

I was today years old when I finally learned that Godzilla (1998) was a Roland Emmerich production.

[@beepster991]

They should have mentioned "Moonstruck" where Nicolas Cage shot Cher on the moon.

[@Football__Junkie]

I thought he slapped her and knocked her all the way to the moon in that?

[@jruedas81]

“SNAP OUT OF IT!”

[@biggiedickson]

@terrylaze74 And you can shoot on me waiting for you in the parking lot!

[@quarterburnt]

And Moon, the movie where Sam Rockwell makes out with himself I think.

[@mightisright]

Damn, you're right. Moonstruck is a better title than any of these.

[@Tyler2k]

"They're bringing back everyone, except for Wil Wheaton", then with that genius slo-mo, too good

[@gunsbulletsheroin]

wheaton has been such a shill for them it's hilarious to see him left out in the cold like this

[@geoffreybrockmeier9218]

@@gunsbulletsheroin His interviews are so cringe. His phony excitement is just revolting.

[@Holesale00]

I felt bad for him, imagine having to watch that in rehearsals and all the old names fade in and you're no where to be seen. It seems like who ever is in charge doesn't want him anywhere near the new run of the show, hell they probably offered him the hosting gig as a gag and he accepted. Its like this whole thing is a drawn out joke at his expense.

[@michelle_pgh]

@@Holesale00 I don't feel bad for him at all. I'd be ecstatic not to have my character's legacy destroyed unlike all the other TNG characters.

[@TheGentlemanGamer]

@@michelle_pgh The legacy of Wesley Crusher.

[@Dreader1962]

One of my favorite lines (and this appears in many movies). (Scene - a car chase where the bad guys pump three shots into the good guys' car, shattering the back window) "They're shooting at us!"

[@jenniferway7719]

My boyfriend made me watch this movie last week and I could do nothing but laugh. It was like a comedic parody. He thought it was a pretty good movie and then I realized he’s really an idiot

[@karlscher5170]

I hope he's either very long or very rich

[@DoctorJammer]

Good for you.

[@Profile__1]

Sorry for your loss

[@bytoadynolastname6149]

The emp conversation reminds me of MST3k. Alien: "These handrails are magnetic." Crow: "And if your hands were made out of metal this would mean something."

[@jpetras16]

I'm pretty sure if you could somehow get an EMP device to precisely shut down the human body, you would be killing him and not just "knocking him out"

[@BeerdyBruceLeeCentral]

I came for the movie review, I stayed for the Star Trek Picard bashing.

[@NCRRanger7753]

**Brandishes a patented ACME Star Trek EMP people knocker-outer** Whadjoo say 'bout Petard?

[@trazyntheinfinite9895]

@@NCRRanger7753 it sucks.

[@NCRRanger7753]

@@trazyntheinfinite9895 Imma tell Alex Kuntsman and he'll pull your eyeball out! Will Wheaton will then turn you inside out with cringe!

[@orionhan2431]

science & technology is literal magic to writers. It can/cant do whatever the plot needs

[@NemanjaNislija]

I came when I saw the notification xD

[@callmetony4399]

Seeing a sequel bait just makes me thing of the fake disaster movie from tropic thunder, scorcher 6 featuring tugg speadman "hear we go again, again"

[@DCuts85]

Just caught up watching this series in it's entirety....because I was worried I was lost on the Mr. Plinkett storyline. I'm not disappointed.

[@applesmithbrigde3529]

This movie was advertised to me heavily about two months ago on KZbin, but the way they portrayed the movie was like a buddy comedy between Patrick Wilson and the GOT nerd.

[@aarondavis8943]

I saw the ad on this very channel a few times. Oh the irony.

[@jrb9191]

I never got that from the trailers.

[@Sushimirollin]

I love the fact that because they are renting the movies at home, they are able to show more clips from the movies

[@troyfoster6004]

I understand now why your channel is so popular. I rented - oh, actually, no, I mean - I bought the movie through Amazon just so I could come back here and watch your review. Now it's all been worth it. Laughing along to your review was the highlight of the entire experience. The money no longer feels wasted.

[@TheTroystreet]

I really love Mike’s little science lesson in the middle of the review

[@Hyppotalamus]

I personnally love the part where they hide from gravity in a shed.

[@francischabot1412]

I had no intention to watch this but now you sparked my interest.

[@walterhoward5512]

... What?

[@michaelgj23]

@@walterhoward5512 they hid from gravity in a shed. Everyone knows you can counter the effects of gravity by hiding in a shed.

[@walterhoward5512]

@@michaelgj23 Of course. Silly me.

[@bej4987]

If gravity can't see you, it doesn't exist

[@jacobbreslau2159]

Stoklasa stumbling over a fairly straightforward Slavic name=Polish excellence 🇵🇱

[@Muster_Muckee_II]

Whenever I think of Slavic words I'm just reminded of the scene of the Germans being confused by Grzegorz Brzęczyszczykiewicz saying he was born in Chrząszczyżewoszyce powiat Łękołody.

[@AntiVectorTV]

"It's like compressing a city bus onto the head of a pin." Mike's not far off, actually. White dwarf density is about the same as cramming an elephant into a teaspoon.

[@nosuchthing8]

I checked and you are very close

[@loathbringer]

Pretty sure it’s like, far larger than that. Like a hill into a spoon. I know the density of a neutron star is like compressing Mount Everest into a tea spoon

[@clemfandango4219]

Nick Frost: who is talented in both writing and comedic timing is never to be confused with John Bradley: who is a ham sandwich that happened to be in game of thrones.

[@JeekayTenn]

In the U.K. I kept seeing the trailer for this movie in every cinema I went to, but the trailer was always edited to focus on the British guy as if he was the main character when it was clear that he wasn't the core of the film. It was as if the trailer was edited to feature the British guy to bring in U.K. audiences as if we only watch films with british characters.

[@cowjuicy]

Aye it was pretty odd, I didn't even realise Halle Berry was in the film until this video.

[@zephyr8072]

To be fair after Brexit and with that straw-haired gammon in charge the world perceives us as a nation of ignorant xenophobic little Englanders who hiss and claw at anything remotely foreign and not reeking of eel pie.

[@maxmalarkey1132]

They 100% did this. I haven’t seen the film and never will, but I can tell from the way Mike and Jay describe it that it’s completely different from what that advert was selling.

[@sboinkthelegday3892]

While in reality, you also watch movies from the british colonies. As long as they're white and speak English.

[@jacobcrist3080]

Im in the US and the trailers I saw focused on him as well from what I remember

[@dwaynezilla]

I've said it before and I'm gonna say it again, that Wil Wheaton footage is the gift that keeps on giving. Probably the best thing to come out of Picard, to be honest.

[@yuhj315]

Was that for real? I couldn't find a source of that.... it was incredible!

[@swans184]

Imagine being such a shill for a franchise you were actually in Edit: damn I didn’t even see that he’s not in season 3 of Picard. That’s fucking hilarious

[@jakubwojcik5167]

43:10 for reference

[@WTFisTingispingis]

@@swans184 Wah wah.

[@chriswakefieldmusic]

What an impeccable and beautiful perfect movie summary by the great poet Mike Stoklasa

[@christian_daigle]

I can't believe you guys made a 47min half in the bag on moonfall... jesus. That was awesome !

[@sweatygarbage6969]

“Let’s just show one scene of the kid and leave it at that” * shows two scenes * Jay you fucking monster

[@TheCorintur]

I love how by the end of the video Mike got so confused that he shouted "I am Rich!". When he is obviously Mike and not Rich.

[@rezaqalam482]

Mike become Rich but without evans

[@redking5788]

I seem to remember that in time machine the guy goes forward in time to when the moon is damaged by mining. The effect being so devastating that half the population ends up evolving into a different species underground. No overground cities are left, there are massive canyons opened up after immense tectonic shifts.

[@deadNightwatchman]

"Roland Emmerich's Moonfall is a movie that no one noticed." Not even your brain did.

[@notchedbandit]

?

[@washingtonirving7153]

@@notchedbandit he probably meant that every frame was so dense

[@qualityautismNoah]

@@notchedbandit you may not have noticed the joke reference he just made... but your brain did.

[@timi_ro]

It didn't even rhymed... like poetry!

[@voltijuice8576]

Brain and brain! What is brain?

[@iainwalker5150]

They say Hollywood doesn’t make comedies anymore, but I was laughing out loud at so many points in Moonfall

[@riseofazrael]

For real, it was very clearly an absolute stinker but I had a great time watching this. Very fun an entertaining, but overall a very bad movie in terms of story and things just making sense lol

[@scrollop]

They did this intentionally, and it had some WTF moments like when the rocket is taking off and surrounded by the tidal wave. Frankly, it's so ludicrous it's cool - where else are you going to see crazy stuff like that other than in video games?

[@sparkpenguin]

my only regret was watching it alone and having no one to riff to but myself

[@primordialserpent1763]

I was getting PTSD flashbacks from Mass Effect 3 when Patrick Wilson was being exposition dumped by that little kid.

[@s3.14dervision]

"What the hell am I looking at here?" Most meta line in the whole movie!

[@lockey88]

I got so into Mike talking about the dyson sphere theory I forgot they were talking about a movie. Quite the crash landing for me when that came back around. Maybe Mike should start a series where he nonchalantly explains science

[@willard39]

Stoklaskasatz

[@b14luar]

I just watched that tng episode

[@ErebosGR]

Dude, just go watch Kurzgesagt. They have episodes on Dyson spheres and even the very plot of this movie.

[@pekinobo]

Release or invite Science Man once again. He sure did a great number on the Terminator time line as I remember.

[@barongerhardt]

Basically a scifi version of drunk history.

[@treefingers1183]

Imagine being a Kaspersky employee, you've been working yourself to the bone all year for a decent bonus, and instead, your boss hands you a ticket to see fucking Moonfall. Because you KNOW they did that to them.

[@Hirnlego999]

And Putler starts a war which makes everyone hate Russia

[@stellviahohenheim]

Antivirus is useless these days since Windows defender took over security

[@Hirnlego999]

@@stellviahohenheim Defender is quite basic, you won't find it at the top in any AV round up reviews.

[@treefingers1183]

@Duane Barry yeah I have no clue about the company itself, I was more or less making a "jelly of the month club" reference

[@jasonfenton8250]

@@Hirnlego999 I use Defender for general antivirus with Malwarebytes as a second opinion. Outside of downloading an adware PuP as a teenager I've never had a problem with viruses, and I download things all the time. Windows Defender is a lot better than it used to be and is a fine antivirus for most users imo.

[@Zergosmuahaha]

Honestly, i would gladly watch a 50 minute version of Mike's intro in this video. Just when it got interesting, it needed to end

[@davelee1935]

Everything everywhere all at once has to be watched in the theater ! Absolutely brilliant

[@KodiKitten343]

The lore dump being a construct of a child that the main character know is straight out of Mass Effect 3 Edit: I've now learned that it's a more common sci fi trope, I didn't know that haha

[@KillahMate]

True - but also, while I'm no sci-fi expert so I can't pinpoint the origin I'm pretty sure that that trope is at least 50 years old.

[@SamuelCatsy]

And not-Simon Pegg becoming part of the AI is the Control ending.

[@zephyr8072]

I’m reminded of Rich Evans talking about not only ripping off Mass Effect but copying the bad one.

[@MrSnaztastic]

Should have had a trigger warning for veterans who survived the star child.

[@Awesomesufff]

Why do things keep copying the worst ending of all time