Her boyfriend is on the downlow. He doesnt want to be touched + She helping her man w/ child support

Рет қаралды 8,796

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 97

@TheMaishaHarris 8 ай бұрын

To the first caller: Lil sis...please know that I understand your need intimacy but know one thing...regardless of how much or little a person pours into you, it is YOUR JOB to fill your emptiness, your void, your cup. Never rely on another person (boyfriend, husband, parent etc.) to fill you up. They are the cherry on the top, not the whole sundae. At 21, please focus on your move, your new apartment, decorating, getting your routines down, your job/business, looking and feeling good on the inside & outside, and having fun. You got this!!!

@melanindawn2050 8 ай бұрын

Great advice.

@GothicGodess 8 ай бұрын

YESS!!!💯💯💯💯

@TheMaishaHarris 8 ай бұрын

To the second caller...Girl. BFFR. You helping with child support??? With a boyfriend at that???!!! Please stop immediately.

@THEBLACKSHEEPSOARS 4 ай бұрын

Desperation is a disease it gotta be

@princesst1149 3 ай бұрын

With a boyfriend, husband, father, or brother… it’s a mental illness to pay or help pay ANY man’s child support. You sure didn’t help him create the child and hopefully you didn’t help him create a broken home for the child. He needs to be a man and take care of his responsibilities which is caring for a child he created

@arosenthal531 8 ай бұрын

Girl!!!!! RUNNNNNN FAST!!!! There’s someone out there who will love you the way you deserve.

@ArtLee68 8 ай бұрын

That’s a fast

@AshaBanksie 8 ай бұрын

First lady needs to run!!! Don't chase it from that man. There are men who will legit give it to you without asking

@ArtLee68 8 ай бұрын

A man in his twenties is always ready. Something is wrong 🏃🏿‍♂️🏃🏿‍♂️🏃🏿‍♂️🏃🏿‍♂️🏃🏿‍♂️🏃🏿‍♂️

@shynebayarea510 4 ай бұрын

He smashing others@ArtLee68

@COOKIEDOUGHTHEGREAT 8 ай бұрын

Well I see nothing wrong with a man living his truth but I see everything wrong with down low .

@ArtLee68 8 ай бұрын

There is definitely something wrong with a man in his early twenties who has a woman and is not all over her.

@mickslife6974 8 ай бұрын

Part 2# you’re only a girl friend. There’s no way you should be involved in any child support agreement.

@ladyteka2430 8 ай бұрын

No way at all. Hopefully she will learn, even if it’s the hard way.

@M2One38 8 ай бұрын

Yes, no legal obligation = no financial responsibility. so everything she is doing is voluntary.

@VitaInDC 8 ай бұрын

First case: Two possibilities: Imo he thinks, or knows, that he caught a disease, and is avoiding sex to not infect her, but is too embarrassed to tell her. Or, he no longer wants sex with women, or at least not black women. I'm retired now, but in my early 20s went thru this in two different relationships. This was in the early '80s, and it was baffling at the time, but please no that lying black men have been gaslighting black women a very long time. Yeah, folks can be with who they want to, but they're creeps when they use the hell out of you and then lie. Knowing what I know now about human nature, this girl would do well to never even speak to him again, and not to be surprised that he doesn't care and barely notices.

@karinazrzu 8 ай бұрын

You told not one lie!

@legallycurvy 5 ай бұрын

Exactly I said he probably caught an STD so he was cheating on her somewhere in 8 to 11 months and now he doesn't want her to touch him because he doesn't want her to find out about the cheating and the STD I don't think he's gay if he was banging her brains out for 11 months I don't think he's gay

@dhqbrandi 8 ай бұрын

Not to be funny but $550 to take care of a child is not a lot . That's less than $10k a year. I'm unsure what she expects rent, food, clothes, activities, is high as hell right now. She talking about taking away from her??? Be very careful you can easily be the next baby mother and then end up getting $550 or LESS now that he has another child ......and just wondering if her child goes to the bm house to play with the daughters as well. If not how can you get upset if she don't want the same 19:57

@GegeP1804 8 ай бұрын

I was thinking $550 a month for a kid is like a week for childcare. She called that lady greedy and I’m like, doesn’t she have a kid to know expenses? She has a kid and probably does everything and gets no support

@angelacox8322 5 ай бұрын

Listennnnnnnn, the way that entire exchange was irking to me!!!! I married my young love and we both only have our 1 child together, however, MANY couples are blended/bringing outside children etc. -- this man's EX-WIFE (and child's mother) has every right to ask for an increase in support EVERY SINGLE TIME he gets a raise or promotion. The fact that she seems confused by this (esp as a 31 y/o single mother herself) is just wild. She's allowed to be annoyed by her situation, but she's a big weirdo to call mommy greedy, it sounds like she's actually been quite kind to ONLY take $550 a month. If she catches this video, she may just let the courts handle it (and she has every right to do that too!)!

@angelacox8322 5 ай бұрын

@GegeP1804 right -- I was like be so ffr!!!! Ashley handled this so well -- it seemed like ole girl really was trying to take it a different direction but kept pumping the breaks seeing Ashley's reactions. She's mad seeing all that extra income going to someone else's home, but had the nerve to call her greedy?!!! I'm going to guess she isn't receiving support for her own son and that's really the root -- respectfully, she should take that up with HER child's father.

@RShaun 8 ай бұрын

If you are in your first year and are not communicating, intimate, missing any of the relationship essentials…please end it. Unless you want to go uphill the entire way with a high likelihood of it never working…leave. You should be getting to know each other and sharing lives and space. If you already separated physically, emotionally…move on. Caveat: If a sudden and known life change happens, like health, accident…then evaluate based on what suits your life and level of commitment. But this is less likely.

@WitchNamedShay 8 ай бұрын

First Caller : Darling you are intelligent and beautiful. 21 , get out there and explore the world. There is someone out there for you that you don’t have to explain, beg, nor reason with. Second Caller: I know it all seems okay now, but it gets WORSE in these situations. You give the baby mama an inch and she will take a mile . I am child free by choice and experimented with a single dad that was a firefighter when I was 26… there was ZERO benefit and once I saw that his baby mama was running the show, I left him a dear John letter and hauled a$$ after 7 months. There is NO REASON for you to restrict your life and finances for children that you do not have. Best of luck !

@yx5991 8 ай бұрын

If her boyfriend would be honest and vulnerable with her about why he doesn’t want to do more than kiss, she might be able to be more understanding or realize she just needs to leave, but to leave someone in the dark like that.. how long is she supposed to wait to see when it gets better when he’s just leaving her clueless. I feel he has one toe In and one toe out with her

@joiswagerty1535 8 ай бұрын

Maybe something happened to him.. maybe he was violated… And he doesn’t want to talk about it and he’s embarrassed

@zabava3248 8 ай бұрын

2 years together and you help pay for someones child support😮

@pthesmith 8 ай бұрын

That doesn’t make sense to me.

@Gem-n-life 8 ай бұрын

She’s going to be contributing for a year whilst he’s away in Korea. When you know about being stationed in Korea, you know……

@lh6784 8 ай бұрын

I hope this lady just moves on with her life. Wanting love from someone who does not reciprocate it will only tear at her self esteem and worth. I know it will be rough but she will feel better in the long run by letting go of this relationship.

@MS-sx5zm 8 ай бұрын

Girl you should not be helping to pay a man's child support. Also $550 is an ample amount of money for child support if he has an average income (less than 6 six figures). Also nothing is wrong with the BM not wanting you to have the kids if the father is not there. She is the bio mom and it's not your kids so it's not your place.

@Gem-n-life 8 ай бұрын

E-5 and above is paying more in child support than that. 0-1 is almost equivalent to E-6 pay. Depending upon the state and cost of living $550 may not be enough.

@MS-sx5zm 8 ай бұрын

@@Gem-n-life me personally I think the child support system is messed up and calculated wrong for many reasons. But that's a whole different conversation.

@Gem-n-life 8 ай бұрын

@@MS-sx5zm -Given many women aren’t getting what’s been ordered, it doesn’t matter how it’s calculated.

@subsistence73 8 ай бұрын

Hmmm... hes not questioning anything.. sounds like he has something... go get checked asap girl

@nicksthegoat 8 ай бұрын

And she’s so pretty she doesn’t deserve that

@Kraftiediva 8 ай бұрын

The guy in the military doesn't need to know her gross income... He can set up an allotment through the financial dept of the military

@Gem-n-life 8 ай бұрын

@@MoPerspective-Whether he becomes an officer or not E-5, and above is paying more than $550 a month.

@deepthinking8633 8 ай бұрын

Girl leave him tf

@labellegene7971 6 ай бұрын

$550 a month is NOTHING !!!!

@The_black_Madonna 8 ай бұрын

2cnd case that is not your business. You are not his wife! 👀

@Gem-n-life 8 ай бұрын

This is one of the things that happened to me as a wife. I have paid my dues to that, and I’m not turning back. I’m child free.

@SagTamekaMasters1996 8 ай бұрын

The first caller is smart beautiful woman. I wish he the absolute best. Too young mama to go thru all that ❤ even if she was older it’s still too young to go thru that. NO WOMAN OR MAN SHOULDNT GO THRU SUCH THINGS. Take care of you and let God do the re at ❤🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️

@rachael862 8 ай бұрын

2. Hes just b using you pay his bills let that man go

@twylamoses1471 8 ай бұрын

He is a Baby narc in the making … Girl he is going to cause you so much pain leave him alone.

@nicksthegoat 8 ай бұрын

Definitely a narcissist

@missfavoured 8 ай бұрын

15:25 Ashley was on point. But the BM shouldn’t let her new BF be around her daughter at this stage

@ChynaMonroe-u7b 8 ай бұрын

Girlllll do your thang get away from that buster 🆗🌹❗️

@ArtLee68 8 ай бұрын

Ash guessed my age at 65. I am going to get some Bigen now.😂😂😂😂 55yrs old is my age.

@ashleyldalton 8 ай бұрын

Please forgive me King Arthur 😅😂 all love here

@ArtLee68 8 ай бұрын

@@ashleyldaltonNo harm taken. I’m here for the support.

@GegeP1804 8 ай бұрын

lol I knew it was you when she mentioned King Arthur. You have good advice and energy. We appreciate your wisdom over here.

@nicksthegoat 8 ай бұрын

He will drive her mad and have her looking old

@Stillwatersrndp 8 ай бұрын

Is intimacy a problem for him, or is he gay? Some men were raised to avoid intimacy, and they have no idea how to express it to a woman.

@Gem-n-life 8 ай бұрын

She said it’s been over the last three months, not the entire time.

@JohnEdmond-i2l 8 ай бұрын

She makes more sense than 50 year olds

@chiefrocka9159 8 ай бұрын

With regard to the child support question here's the deal. Get a promotion and it's on lime Donkey Kong. The court's don't care if you go from E7 to being commissioned as a Warrant Officer at the W2 rank. They want to see what both parties make. It's the same thing when you retire and get start another career. The court's will want to see both pay stubs. I'll advise that when retirement goes down and you get that first retirement check, file a motion to have that CS revisited sooner than later. Especially if you're not working.

@CEOViola 8 ай бұрын

He has been SA and he cant tell you. He is ashamed because now he's questioning his sexuality.

@micheleaperry74 8 ай бұрын

Just cos she send an itemized list don’t mean she’s gonna spend the money on it

@msblackberry09 20 күн бұрын

The second girl needs to stay out of her boyfriend’s and child’s mom business. How can you tell him that his child’s mom is being greedy?! That woman is raising that kid and is the primary caretaker.

@Denise24-7 8 ай бұрын

The second girl needs to get out of their business. He’s not your husband. Let him figure that out. You inserting yourself in their personal business.

@Marvalously_Thick 8 ай бұрын

What if he’s dealing with childhood trauma ? It could be something deeper 🤔

@rachael862 8 ай бұрын

If hes having sex dont sleep w him. Co-workers smashing coworkers. Walk away focus on ur career get tested leave him. He should be giving you 550. 559 could be going to diff women

@lakishaarrington7573 8 ай бұрын

? Is the 550 for the child or it’s for the mother…

@rachael862 8 ай бұрын

He needs to make get better job not ur responsibility psy child support . Girl move on ur young u can find a byetter man. Ur aex ur energy coat more 550 know ur worth hes using you pay child support leave his ass at curve hes an opportunist user ur paying 50/50 too thats why hes w you you make his life easier girl run away

@tasharenee4835 4 ай бұрын

Why does he care about her grossly income? Girlfriend is envy of the baby momma.

@msblackberry09 20 күн бұрын

Jess claims that her boyfriend asked her to have her friend draw up a legal document. I highly doubt that man asked her that. I believe that’s something SHE suggested. Let’s keep it real here. If the shoe was on the other foot with Jess and her baby dad she would be pissed that another woman is putting her nose where it don’t belong

@RShaun 8 ай бұрын

To the sexuality, there is a spectrum of sexuality and in the Black community, it is a lot more shamed and repressed. A lot of religious programming is still present. As people move further away from social pressure, they can discover their true alignment. There are many asexual people, and many more bi and homosexual. Plus there are probably some that have one sexual alignment and a different romantic alignment. Life is not black and white.

@yx5991 8 ай бұрын

Demisexual too.

@Dmj007 8 ай бұрын

THISSS!

@123paramorefan 8 ай бұрын

Yeah idk this is so…like some ppl are just gay or bi and that’s it. It’s not caused by anything

@Empressme222 8 ай бұрын

Yeah so the problem with this is when you can’t be authentically yourself and get in a relationship it’s completely unfair for the other person to not be emotionally fulfilled because said “bi/gay” person has self identity issues and came come to terms with it.

@Dmj007 8 ай бұрын

I mean just because he’s not intimate doesn’t mean he’s gay or cheating… people can be asexual and is afraid of telling you. Maybe he’s going through something…? Don’t assume and just leave if you’re unhappy girl

@123paramorefan 8 ай бұрын

I’m saying ..

@sarahoop5859 8 ай бұрын

I agreed but if your partners actions towards you change and they go a month without communicating your gonna be stressed out it’s just not normal. Bc she doesn’t know what going on ofc she gonna make assumptions it’s not easy leaving a situation and no knowing what went wrong when you love them and want to be with them.

@Dmj007 8 ай бұрын

@@sarahoop5859 I totally see what you’re saying! A change in behavior is a red flag and should be investigated but assuming things like him being attracted to the same sex without any SOLID proof is damaging to her mental and the relationship. She needs she asks him flat out what’s going on. Learning to not assume things about situations is one of the things I learned after reading the four agreements. Ultimately it’s her choice to stay or leave ❤️

@kujas 7 ай бұрын

@@Dmj007 honestly it’s better if she assumed he was gay

@Chikou14219 8 ай бұрын

I feeeel like $550/month is low, no? That is a month of groceries (no take out included)…

@tenekag0522 8 ай бұрын

Stay out of it... Usually things get worse when the girlprovides their input on it... Things was fine until you had a say.So it also never helped a man with no child support.You was not in a bed with them too not your responsibility...