High value woman shacking up w/o a ring + Man demands segg from his girlfriend who ready to leave

[@_jasminealaya]

Once you start begging for a ring and trying to prove yourself to a man, you start diminishing your value.

[@RaisingLittleLearners]

Agreed, too much time has passed. I get it they’re still young but it seems like she’s ready & he isn’t.

[@roshannabobb2109]

Agree

[@Nikki-p1t]

Once you cohabitate with a man not your fiancée or husband, you diminish your value. It’s too late for her.

[@AlinaWhite-s4e]

He is not ready because he is not into her. He might like her and think she is beautiful but she is NOT the one. 4 brothers and something I learned is that even at 25 a man knows when he found the one

[@user-ce5kh3uo1h]

fr. been thru this. its done.

[@MalevolentElephant]

If you are a woman and want to be married, it’s a bad idea to shack up. As men, we lose the incentive to want to marry you if we are getting husband benefits already. Some of you ladies make it too easy. Just my two opinion, with love. Also, she messed up by being with a man so young.

[@Msjessi6]

Thank you for being honnest

[@tmcurly]

Yes, It is a bad idea 👎🏽. I have never done that!

[@hellothere8347]

You are so right! And I’m glad you comment that! Tony Gaskins be telling us the same thing!

[@VeeKayGreenerGrass]

I agree. Get housemates if rent in the place you want to live is high.

[@Remember-Death]

Facts. This is where we get the phrase: *Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?*

[@IandiBoats]

Ladies if you want to be married don't move in with a Man Without A Spoken plan for marriage that includes a timeline. As well as financial saving goals and other goals. Stop giving away the milk.

[@MsLotusBlooms]

No, I prefer to be married before living with a man not having a plan for it.

[@missamerica2694]

I agree! Hopefully black women start establishing these standards, but probably not because if b.w did,bm would not get S3X or women at all lol!

[@Jmarie0134]

@@MsLotusBlooms that’s you, some women want to see what living with the man is like once they get engaged because a lot of men are night & day once you live with them

[@joimonae4090]

@@Jmarie0134get a short term lease for a year with your fiancé and take marriage counseling during that year if by the end of the lease is up and y’all haven’t agreed to move forward then move on me personally I don’t want to live with a man before marriage all of what we expect from each other should be discussed before hand and written out to hold us both accountable nothing should a surprise at that point

[@Gotinks]

Women make the mistake of moving in. I would tell my daughter to leave. That girl isn't going to leave because someone else will step in and she feels like 3 years are vested. She gave up her leverage playing housewife. Don't give him a date of when you are leaving, Just leave.

[@VeeKayGreenerGrass]

Women need to learn early that starting over is not a bad thing.

[@jaeshasway]

With a quickness. If marriage was her goal she should have dated with that intention.

[@nickysunshine8734]

Yea giving a deadline is not going to work. Just walk away…

[@mzbrown6969]

the sooner you leave the faster is to get away

[@Trapz4Dayz]

@@jaeshaswayWomen control access to sex, and the sexual revolution devalued it by separating it from marriage. Let that marinate.

[@soulmusic6049]

Before I got married, I moved in with my now husband part time and I kept my apartment, he kept telling me I’m wasting money cause I hardly was at my place but was still paying rent and I could simply move in with him. I told him if he wants me to give up my apartment and move in with him, we gotta get married and it’s nonnegotiable. I moved in and 2 weeks later we went to the courthouse and got married. Ladies set your standards and stand on it.

[@Sandrinarhonda]

Is your husband black

[@ej2507]

Same thing I did

[@maryuhh89]

This part

[@Novembersongbird]

Congrats..How long have you been married now?

[@naturallove6615]

This is the energy I have always been own! I have never lived with a man and when I do we have to be married.

[@lisaevans6000]

Mama always said, “why buy the cow if you can get the milk FREE?” 🤷🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️

[@MrTwonetwone]

Smart

[@taraking8555]

Just typed this...lol. She already acting like a wife.

[@justicevibes1252]

It's true.

[@kimval3547]

@@justicevibes1252

[@LHarr-w8b]

TRUE IF U GET IT FREE WHY WAIT .TIP DONT ACT DESPERATE NEVER PUT OUT IN THE BEGINNING HE WILL DEFINITELY DEVALUE U❤❤❤

[@KENZIIE_lol]

I'm a dude. 55. It's very important that this woman leave this relationship yesterday. She should not give him till 12/31/2024. The host is correct, he's "struggling" because he sees all the other women out there and he does not want to get locked down so "young", well in his mind. You see, his prime is about to begin, and he knows it. Right now he's caught in the middle between his lust for the adventurous lifestyle of our teenage fantasies in the form of multiple women, and one good woman in Erica, that he knows is the better option. It's a tough place to be, but he needs to understand those fantasies only lead to regret. " A double minded man is unstable in all his ways." James 1:8 But alas, I think this one will end. He'll pick door A, get all the seggs he can, but be empty in the end. My instinct says he's already cheating, but I hope I'm wrong. Anyway, run Erica, and don't look back. This is not the man the Lord has for you. Him wanting to marry you "someday" is too much of a risk on your part. Before you know it, someday means you're 30 yrs old. Then he dumps you for another younger woman. And God forbid you give a child to this man.

[@tmcurly]

The Guy is too young! If they marry it will be an issue! She needs a 35 year old ! 🤦🏽‍♀️🤕

[@bull8563]

I wonder how many people that's saying this very young couple should break up, are they themselves are in a meaning marriage or relationship. Sometimes you got to be very suspect who and where you get advice from.

[@KENZIIE_lol]

@@bull8563 I am married for the last 17 yrs with 3 kids. 21 yrs together. She has given him 3 yrs already, and still no marriage, She is in grave danger of losing her prime years to a man that will breakup with her anyway, and get a younger woman. In my 55 yrs I've seen it countless times.

[@KENZIIE_lol]

@@tmcurlyI agree. I've told my wife that's the exact info I will give my daughters. A successful, mid-30s guy is in his prime, and has done it all, and he's most likely in that phase for a family. A younger, attractive, childless woman in her prime, is the perfect exchange.

[@smoothlyabrasive9805]

She better run back home, she not use to paying all the upkeep of housing.

[@rosewatersweettea]

Shacking up without a ring automatically demoted you to desperate pick me. At 25, gorgeous and educated you can get a ring within months from someone that truly never wants to leave you.

[@MalevolentElephant]

As a man, I agree with that, but she needs to be dating men in their 30s

[@lolab6770]

She can, but not in her age range. Men in their 20s in this age generally aren't ready for that. She needs to date men at least 10 years older.

[@odog76543]

You can be desperate regardless if you are married or not. The ring isn't the deciding factor for that. I'm sure there are a lot of desperate men who would marry any woman within months. That doesn't mean it's a good idea for him or her.

[@brown_beauty7499]

Facts!!! She's a Queen.

[@NuGgEt-zi9le]

I moved in before my husband and I got married I never pressured him either he knew what he wanted and so did I. We have a beautiful baby and full support from both sides of the family ❤

[@VeeKayGreenerGrass]

Never shack up in your 20s and 30s ladies, especially if you want to get married. Have housemates with similar values if you want to live a certain lifestyle and can't afford it on your own, or live alone if you can afford it.

[@tinawalker5335]

Erica made me realize I need to grow up and I'm a successful 43 year old. I will vow to keep my hair done in 2024 and do a little light beat 3-4 days out of the week.

[@tatijas]

👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽💕

[@RoniqueaRenee]

Same. My braids are so cute and I just picked up new makeup brushes and eos lotion. ❤ Let’s do it sis!

[@ItsjustKey]

Me too!! 😅

[@taz9234]

Me too 🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿🤭😁

[@ladejohnson8968]

Me too. More heels 👠 in 2024 too

[@bgurley1998]

Erica has been parading around being a stay at home girlfriend on TikTok but now wants marriage... definitely should have discussed that before moving in. She isn't going to leave him because he's providing a certain lifestyle.

[@PaperboyPrincee]

thats her content?

[@TeeTee-2016]

That doesn’t mean he won’t leave her. I think she’s rolling the dice while this young man has choices.

[@Kaneshaa]

I knew she looked familiar.

[@MoiraPraline]

lol 😂😂😂

[@taliahali9827]

Exactly very interesting. She should’ve kept this to herself

[@sarahdaniel5185]

My dad was a Pastor and always said people make plans then try to throw God in them… she moved in with guy does her own will now says let’s do marriage … honey God comes first. And aside from religious talk - MEM DO WHAT THEY WANT. I see 18 year olds getting married. Honey he doesn’t want to. You don’t have to give a man an ultimatum. Period.

[@AllThingsTayloured]

This is the ABSOLUTE truth!

[@ORIGINAL__ONE]

Sad the women in her family didn't tell her how to get married And her father didn't tell Boyfriend you have to marry my daughter and no shacking up

[@desdior1207]

Lol they want us to figure things out

[@keptbygrace6221]

They told her, she's just hard-headed. The same thing happened with my sister. She called my parents old-fashioned and thought she knew better... Hopefully this young lady will learn before it's too late.

[@mariestorm3321]

EXACTLY

[@Nikki-p1t]

They told her by example of getting married & staying married. She just didn’t listen. The problem younger generation have is despising tradition, thinking they can reinvent what’s been working for centuries.

[@she2good2btrue]

She wants to marry for her family & the image. He may propose but keep her engaged until 30 or so. She doesn’t strike me as leaving because she’s enjoying being able to do her financially, no real responsibilities.

[@temporamoresque]

This is it.

[@brih4776]

Yes!

[@ImaniEstrella]

I’m so glad I took Ashley’s advice to not move in with my boyfriend🙌🏼

[@Lovelyparadise1]

“He is the one “ - first thing she mentions is what he does for her (pays all the bills) and what she does for him. Doesn’t mention his personality or character traits. Then we learn they are unequally yoked. You wouldn’t have to give “the one” a deadline sister. You are too beautiful to be wasting time

[@Bluntgirly]

See you peep game & I like that.. the glitz and glam is a distraction to the flawed character !

[@MoiraPraline]

She too embarrassed to go back home to mama and the aunties, ringLESS!

[@TheMoorishCourtofAlShaniqua]

I thought women like y'all disappeared 😂

[@marisaking5982]

did you really just ask what does she do for him?

[@mizzmolly7649]

Let's not even talk about being with a man who obviously doesn't care that she's going against her Christian beliefs because he's just happy shacking up. Girl, get out of there!

[@jesusisable7052]

That part for me 🎯

[@itsokaee]

Yupppp My first thought

[@gerardparker4220]

They don’t share the same values. Red flag

[@xshesyourqorqeousxx3]

My husband is 25 and I'm 27. We never lived together, and I feel like that's where Erica messed up unfortunately. She gave him all the benefits of being married (besides the baby) and he got comfortable. I don't think him being young is the reason, it's his mindset. My husband always wanted to get married, his parents are married, so he's never been afraid. Her man isn't positive marriage imagery so for him he's afraid, has doubts, and probably won't be mentally ready to about 30. The questions is does she want to wait until she's 29.

[@dialac1]

Never tell a man when to propose. Never give a man such a deadline. You don’t “deserve” a ring. A man should ask you to be his wife if he sees you as such. If you give him an ultimatum, it can and will backfire. A 26 year old guy is still on his path to becoming a man. He has a lot of uncertainty. Show him the value you bring to him and you won’t have to give him a deadline. A man only proposes to a woman he feels he cannot live without.

[@trombonefellow]

I hope she does leave him, it'll be tough if he really cares about her but it will show him he can replace any woman if he focuses on his purpose and self improvement.

[@invest2115]

Ladies, please listen; 1. Men are not rushing to marriage. 2. If a man sees you as a wife, he'll wife you up quick. clean house, putting yourself together should be a given- however, when men are vetting for marriage, we look ar character, attitude, resourcefulness, femininity, soft power, submission- the death of ego to birth romance. A delicate dance of the masculinity and femininity fusion.

[@allendaniel7405]

37 year old man here and I will say this. Young lady, that young man is not ready for marriage especially at the age of 26. If he was in 30s, sure. But not now. You're better off leaving him and finding a man who will marry you.

[@CutieePiee1218]

The problem is, if a man is providing your lifestyle it gets harder to leave and give it space. And we get jaded of losing him because it seems like a trait not alot of men have. Im hopeful she will be married she’s gorgeousssss and marriage minded. He’s not that young! Hes wise enough to provide for that woman cause look at her!!!! Cmonnnnn 😢 and as she said money isn’t a issue. I wish her luckk!

[@trombonefellow]

Men don't have that trait because they're jaded too. You reward gis efforts with "space" and " ultimatums" you're just going to show men to look out for themselves

[@Humaima]

Lmfaooo but when we told her on tik tok we were hating soooo bad.

[@brownskinnbri8192]

Yesss. This was annoying me like sis we want to see you married!

[@charlesjones7770]

I have to say this is the only channel I actually look at on the perspective of a woman due to Ashley being well rounded with her explanations. It's like she can see through some of the information that the women are providing her and can give her pinpoint perspective without ruffling the guest feathers. I hope other women take notes because her patience and presentation is just beautiful to watch.

[@RoniqueaRenee]

She picked the wrong man sorry. She should have made dating a marriage minded man non-negotiable. She can leave but he not gonna come back bc he will feel pressured.

[@coreyflagge5850]

Finally, someone said it. Many woman get caught up with the money and lifestyle and totally forget about the man's mentality toward marriage. He must be marriage minded first.

[@Babygirlygirl1232]

Agreed!

[@Jaycarbrownie12]

No he will put a ring on it

[@Keeishhaaa]

Wait, Erica, I just saw her video on TikTok talking about how good her relationship is and how much he takes good care of her. Honestly, it should have been talked about before she moved in with him.

[@tendai.talkss]

what's her tiktok?

[@Keeishhaaa]

@@tendai.talkss Erica M

[@TIAOFNEBULA]

I saw her on TikTok tooo... 2 things can be true.. he can be a great man but also is not the best man for her in not being marriage minded.

[@J_Elle30]

It’s giving she tryna build her followers😂 #content but her story is interesting

[@RCooke357]

She did say in this video that he is a good man, so what she is saying is consistent. But she wants marriage and he isn't giving it to her.

[@janiceburgess4679]

I like how she always ask ladies to use their intuition. It will always guide you and to never make excuses for a man or anyone for that reason. Always meet people where they are. ❤

[@africagreen902]

Not sure how these ended up in my timeline but I am a new subscriber and such a fan already. I love how you speak to these women. I love the grace, elegance, authenticity of everything I’ve seen so far. Let me continue my binge watching!

[@Omeda.S.Yapah.S.TheKOS]

THAT SECOND SISTER NEEDS TO GET THE BUDGETNISTA BOOKS!!!!

[@RisingGems]

I moved in before marriage with someone and It was the worst thing but great at first. I was hoping he eventually would see me as a wife. Boy I was wrong, once they get a feel of what it would like being married to you after awhile the fun idea turns into a dreadful idea because he never actually wanted marriage with me or in general. It was like an experiment gone bad to help us both put financially tbh feelings were developed and yeah never doing that again. God doesn’t want us to live with someone we’re not married to because it can lead to a lot of confusion and heartbreak

[@Not_A_Hopeless_Romantic]

The first young lady need to get her own source of income so she can support herself in Dallas and move out. Once she move out, start dating. Let him know you are high value and you can get another man easily. Either he will do one of two things: 1) move out or 2) he will realize what he’s missing and pop the question expeditiously. Please don’t settle for this man. You are in a trap to get pregnant, then you will really be stuck with him. Also, isn’t she the girl that’s going viral about her boyfriend being a provider? Maybe I’m wrong but this story sounds familiar.

[@Msjessi6]

Yes it is her!!!

[@Dlovesyou1]

Yes! She is the girl that went viral toting on how her boyfriend called her job and told her to quit and sent movers to get her to move in with him because she was unhappy with her job. He also bought her equipment to start KZbin and moved to a high rise so that she can have better lighting lol. Somethings not adding up. And as a woman who is learning I would like to know why a man would do all this and be with someone for 4 years and not marry them?

[@Msjessi6]

@@Dlovesyou1 I 100% agree with you but then I heard his age……. Four years ago he would’ve been 22. I don’t know many 26 year olds who are ready for marriage. But I do think in the next year or two since they’ve been together for so long and he is providing for her. He should be asking her hand in marriage , if not it’s a bit questionable.

[@Not_A_Hopeless_Romantic]

@@Dlovesyou1 right! He’s trying to get her comfortable and complacent with having a “provider” so he can use her to do all the household duties and give him sex without true commitment. Once he get tired of her, he’s going to find his real wife and kick her to the curb if she continues to pressure him. It’s better to just reap the benefits, save a lot of money, move in silence and move out if she don’t get her way by the end of the year.

[@Sandrinarhonda]

@@Not_A_Hopeless_Romanticexactly

[@MsChrissyr]

He gives her the ring but he ddnt come to the decision himself is a very bad recipe. He might completely turn rebellious and make her deal with it bc she has the ring "ring " As a Christian woman read the story of when we forced things outside God's timing.

[@ericaalove]

I am currently in the same situation as destiny, its so heartbreaking and a dark place to be. I recently broke up with him and he doesnt take me seriously so thank you Ashley its like your speaking to me too.

[@danettechavis]

To the woman without the ring: I'm gonna answer you according the scripture because that's where your roots are. So you already know, there are "words and prayers covering you" and the grace of God upon you has sustained you despite the relationship you are currently in. HERE'S THE ISSUE: The bible says, "a Man who finds A WIFE has found a good thing, he has found favor with the Lord". Your husbands hesitation to "marry you" (AND I SAID HUSBAND FOR A REASON) is not because of his age, or any fears concerning marriage. It is because "he cannot find you" because you "already exist". You are asking him to ask for "what he already has" and it makes no sense because he already has it. He was suppose it "find it" as stated within the scripture. But it was "given to him" instead. So although you he loves you and desires to keep you, he cannot find his way to you AS A MAN WANTS TO!! Every man wants to "go after and obtain the wife of his dreams". How can he - when he already has her? He wants the "honor of proposing" of "laying his heart on the line and being ACCEPTED". And he is desperately, desperately tryna find a way in which to do it - that is "from him" and "by him" NOT "a wife" who DEMANDS IT or gives ULTIMATUMS by which to do to! You are making him "bow" when he desires to "stand tall like a man" before family & friends and all concerned, in a request for your hand in marriage. He is in fact "your husband" and you are in fact "his wife". You have done everything concerning A MARRIAGE that is needed and necessary EXCEPT "pronounced it" before family, friends and God! The issue here is: the "order" in which you proceeded. you did "first" what should have been done "last". And now, you are seeking the adjustment needed because you recognize the "honor" which is needed, for yourself "first" and indeed those of your family, who cannot take pleasure, or rejoice or even celebrate what you two have accomplished because it was initiated in their disapproval. Whatever you do - DO NOT force, or coerce this man into marriage. And if you leave, be prepared to say "good bye" to what you had hoped concerning it. Cause if it had not been for you - where do you suppose he would be? And if you "open up that door" expect him to "walk through it" after investing 4 YEARS OF HIS LIFE to one woman! My dear, the scriptures declare, "if any man lack wisdom - let him ask of God, who will give it freely and not "spank you" for asking. (I'm paraphrasing to convey the actual meaning, so that you understand it) All the best to you on your journey.

[@Blissedx]

I did the same thing the soft girl is doing. My advice is RUNNNNN …. Date men 35 plus after you leave ❤❤

[@Yawn54]

Naw, older men are controlling & insecure.

[@KimberlyNewbold-g4k]

and just as childish .@@Yawn54

[@drillingig2368]

@@Yawn54It’s because you want a relationship without the sacrifice (AKA avoiding accountability).

[@lillysarethebest409]

@@drillingig2368nah ur just spewing words u heard another man say on a podcast if anything she sacrificed TOO MUCH moving in and sleeping with a man shes not even married to.

[@talkswithcookie]

I got married young and I’m divorced now. We also got married fast within 6 months. We are co parenting now and are great friends but we were simply too young. I would just give him time if that’s who she really wants. Space def makes the heart grow fonder

[@MarlonGianmarco]

If she moves out the relationship is over, that would be moving backwards for him. She knew what she was signing up for

[@realrachelleakuffo]

I understood what you were asking Destiny. That man is trying to break her. She has to know this is NOT God's best for her.

[@ButHearMeOutTho]

Living together, It depends. We got married while living together. I just minded my business, no pressure, got it within 2yrs. I just made sure I didn't get pregnant first. If he sees a wife, he'll secure the wife position for you.

[@sweetzmamakitchen7815]

Same here

[@jesusisable7052]

@@sweetzmamakitchen7815how old was y’all when y’all married ?

[@ladyt4905]

Sounds like Bria's parents are really easy on her!! Once u become a parent, you have to step it up asap!!

[@chunli1143]

but shes grown at this point what can parents do

[@Girlgonewise]

If he wanted to…he would.

[@alexisfonseca5515]

Brias situation I used to wish I could be in her situation but as a 29 year old I’m glad I’m self sufficient and have independence with the blessings to help my mom and chunk her some assistance. 🙏

[@ma4308]

She needs to leave SILENTLY, stop complaining and no longer bring up the issue. Focus on yourself, move out and decenter him that’s the only way to undo the error of giving him everything. Absence makes the heart grow fonder

[@CaviarCelestial]

Story of my life. I’m from Baltimore as well. Moved to Dallas with my boyfriend at the time also. No 9-5, leisure life. Same conversations & family concerns. Didn’t work out for me but I’m still here in Dallas thriving & living. Best wishes babe!

[@pickmeisha]

A high value woman doesn’t shack up…

[@CrystalKwashie]

Originally when I saw her video on Instagram I thought 4 years, living together and no ring is a little scary. But hearing their ages, he might not be ready yet. Men get a 2 year max in my opinion but after the age of 28. Making a life long commitment and being a Christian and doing it Gods way isn’t something that’s understood in the immature male (and sometimes female) mind. She doesn’t wanna rush it and they fail because of immaturity. Learn who God called man and wife to be and I guarantee with therapy and love they’ll be ready. She shouldn’t leave him.

[@tmcurly]

Correct ✅ BUT Must move out !!! Religious parent are ok with shacking up ??

[@hellothere8347]

Yeah I don’t think she should leave him either nobody is perfect he just young and maybe just really afraid. And guys take more time to mature than females anyway.

[@hellothere8347]

@@tmcurlyAGREED

[@Babygirlygirl1232]

His not yet, is still her no. She has a fertility window, he does not. 4 years is too long. If he’s not ready, that’s fine, but that doesn’t mean she should wait for him!

[@J_Elle30]

Okay, I thought that was her😂

[@TaniTaniTani1]

Bria, hunny plan your exit date to leave Mom's house. I was in the same boat, heard the same thing. I got tired of paying majority of her bills and realized I can pay my own bills. Long story short, I left with my son and haven't gone back like my other siblings.

[@CinemaDoll137]

I watch her on TikTok and a little surprised to see her on here since she seems to have it all figured out and seemingly okay with not being married since she's stuck around for so long.

[@CinemaDoll137]

Couples therapy with a boyfriend sounds like he doesn't want to get married to her.

[@earthzone85]

I love the way the host is speaking to them . She is intelligent and caring I have to subscribe

[@ishaw9894]

The worst mistake a woman can do is move In before marriage. Especially when you are in your early 20-30’s. It can ruin the whole dynamic and make your partner feel like he doesn’t have to continue to pursue you. I been there before and I’ll never do it again.

[@teal1010]

She started crying when she told her what she already knows!

[@Misspinkbeauu]

Never tell a man when he’s being narcissistic, just plot your exit.

[@jayscott5618]

I appreciate you for being kind to these women. A lot of us don’t have anyone.😢

[@Mannywinsz72]

You gave Bria GREAT advice 🔥🔥

[@mayas5228]

I stacked the most money being at home for 2 years . When it was time, I was able to buy my own car and move to a nice place. Save and help your parents out

[@taz9234]

He is not going to marry her with ultimatums.

[@MsMookalate]

Destiny is why I’m safely single and healing from the same situation. The difference is we have kids but with distance and boundaries I don’t even worry as much. It’s not like he’s active in their lives just a couple times a year but mostly on the phone dad

[@caroljohnson3113]

I don’t think you were hard on her I want to tell you thank you so much, Ashley, you are inspiration to the young women. They really need to hear that.

[@kaylovekay]

The last woman was so vulnerable and open. I love that for her.

[@aminamcintosh1439]

LOL I literally found this lady on TikTok TODAY, wow that’s crazy, I thought the same thing (why hasn’t he married her yet) but they seem happy 💯

[@queenofsheba5846]

Oh Bria. Her parents are probably the reason why she got there in the first place but it‘s her job to live her own life and make better decisions. Especially since she is a mom now. It sounds very dangerous that she seems to not have no sense of urgency nor nurturing instinct, no therapy gonna help that out when you don‘t actually make a choice. Something else must be going on that she did not mention. Cause it seemed veeeeeery easy breasy for her to say it so nonchalantly. Her poor son. I hope she makes it. All the best for her.

[@ChanelNo5568]

Womennnnn!!! Set boundaries. They should have had this worked out before she moved in. I’m talking engagement length and wedding date. She is doing everything for him, what does he need to marry her for.

[@J_Elle30]

Ashley you a wonderful discernment and I love that you are sharing and helping other women! Keep up the amazing work❤

[@hairmunsta9788]

Truth in leaving and letting that man miss you. It’s time for action not pretty words.

[@hellothere8347]

Destiny that man is terrible. Block and keep it pushing you don’t owe him anything at all.

[@casy6203]

That second one was an amazing! We need to learn discipline and sacrifice!

[@desiresalonskin1280]

It seems like she just wants marriage because her family believes it’s an accomplishment.

[@DynastyPlaybooks]

Her family (parents) want her to stop sexually sinning.

[@tmakjus]

She gave Destiny excellent advice

[@talkswithcookie]

My mom felt like Brias but she also spoiled and enabled that lifestyle. I had to show her that I can do it on my own and sneak and move lol. I learned saying you can do it vs doing it are definitely different. And that’s all my mom would say if she wasn’t her would I be ok (my dad has passed already and spoiled me the most). She definitely gotta just go and do it.

[@claricedodd9179]

I’m new to your channel. I really like how you give good sound guidance to these young ladies.

[@shaecarter1837]

Thank you Ashley for your content.

[@root1621]

Can I just say, thank you so much Ashley for holding space for these women to safely share what is going on in their lives Also thank you to the women who share. It is so brave and I am learning so much.

[@twitterblackdove]

The only thing Miss Erica, respectfully, is that we don't know what he'd say (he probably wouldn't) or how he feels about your interaction on a personal level that may be the deal breaker for him. Sweetheart, it's not just about what you do but also what you say, your mentality, the experiences the two of you share. With men, there might be one thing, one flaw, that they just can't commit too. Honestly, it's like that in the mind of independent women these days, they won't tolerate for long at all let alone commit to for a lifetime. We live and we learn. All the best ❤

[@twitterblackdove]

I wrote the message above before Bria and I'm so glad she seemed to receive the sobering advice. Ashley, my heart absolutely broke listening to the pain in Destiny's voice and her story. ALD you are a 💎

[@mythoughts1763]

WORDS MEAN NOTHING, ACTIONS MEANS EVERYTHING!!!!

[@4everfaithfulun2Him]

How are you a hard core Christian but fkn and sckn unmarried? Yall Christians slay me

[@tasintamron]

😂

[@Taj-Mahal]

She shouldn't give him another day. It's already been 3 years. She should leave immediately otherwise, she's just delaying the inevitable & she knows it.

[@Teetoy4]

Destiny sounds so broken, girl get in that semi and get on the road!!!

[@Lan-n6z]

Yes 😭 She need to leave him in the dust

[@candacenkoth]

+ To block him, find therapy, healthier friends and a prayer group. Also, once you are healed, date multiple men without sleeping with anyone.

[@wavesonswim8738]

She’s been set up to fail if she believes marriage is an accomplishment. Not everyone is guaranteed a great love

[@dantoinettetaylor1663]

Marriage is not all about love and romance. It’s more about a lifestyle,,, and economics

[@wavesonswim8738]

@@dantoinettetaylor1663 absolutely, people need to be honest with themselves. It’s not for everybody, it requires a measure of selflessness

[@TIAOFNEBULA]

Marriages that last the longest or a lifetime is not based on solely love lol

[@wavesonswim8738]

@@TIAOFNEBULA did I say that they were ?

[@TIAOFNEBULA]

did I say you said that?@@wavesonswim8738

[@Juju_belle7]

She’s a gorgeous woman and comes from a really good foundation. She admits he doesn’t have the same upbringing. She KNEW better but she did it anyway. He knows she knew better and she went against her whole upbringing and moral code to appease him. In his mind he’s the man. This is the greatest boost to a man’s ego when they see you turn your back on your own values to make them happy when deep deep down they may not feel like they even deserved that. She should’ve made him court her until he presented a ring and then move in together. I’m sure he’s probably not a bad guy but even if he gives her the ring before the deadline, if he truly feels like he isn’t ready, that marriage might be rocky. Best of luck to her.

[@xena1374]

We know what we know and what we need to do, but we still may need to have conversations and confirmations.

[@whyzzman]

The young lady Bria - I'm sorry, but her parents failed her. What you told her is what her parents should have been telling her ever since she was 15yrs old. Goodluck to her.

[@LouLou-ut6eb]

If marriage is important why didn’t she require that before moving in? I think marriage is just for show for some of these younger ladies…

[@cherenadawson8910]

When my best friend proposed (freinds for 2 years) I moved in and after moving in at mid June and he was dead set on marriage and we got married that end of August ...we went from platonic friendship, engaged, and married in 2 and a half months. If he wants to, he will.

[@Sheba_316]

Ultimatums don’t end or work well. She looks like a great girl and if he hasn’t put a ring on it after 3 years? It could be a matter of right person at the wrong time. Wish her the best, it may also mean not with him. God is faithful to give you what you need.

[@Girlschitchat]

He doesn't want to marry her never bring up marriage to a man stay silent and observe his conversation if hes thinking of marriage he will bring it up if hes ready he will start moving different if you have a time frame that you want to get married dont let it be known to a man move in silence if you see that hes not mentioning and moving towards marriage leave when you remain silent you will see how eager and serious he is or isnt about you men are not complicated they are very vocal on the things they want but never ever give a man an ultimatum he needs to be scared of losing you one of the quickest ways to make a man propose is to have other men approaching you in his front when he sees he has competition he will step up or if he doesn't than hes not scared of losing you shes playing wife without being a wife thats a big mistake and he sees her as someone whos going to always be there she needs to move out immediately and date someone maybe older hes still young probably exploring his options shes the prize and needs not beg a man to marry her i mean December 2024 the fact that you even have to give an ultimatum tells you all you need to know

[@googleuser9528]

Erica is not a wife yet because she is doing everything a wife does as a girlfriend. Why should he give her a ring when he receives what he needs without the commitment? Men commit when they know what they want and who they want. He's comfortable because she has not left (she's said its been 3 yrs). Also, men don't respond to deadlines. Either he wants to marry her or he doesn't. Its that simple. Stop doing wifely things for boyfriends.

[@LiciaD]

Excellent advice for Bria!

[@kaydubya6347]

That's a whole nother year. NOPE NOPE NOPE

[@reneegibson2911]

Toss that 12/31/24 out. Make your decision today.

[@mzbrown6969]

Idk she chose a man who did not grow up with the same family structure and probably value systen so her expectations may not be understood or supprted by her partner. I dont believe in giving a man an ultimatum. I would put that beautiful hair in a ninja knot or ponytail, secure a job that covers all my expenses or just go back home to the parents and hit the reset on dating and life. Although its giving the appearance of soft life, in actuality this is hard living in a pretty package, so dont be confused. 4 years is enough time to know why add another year, especially if she wants children. He can be a good friend but make him history if he is not making you his future if its too much pressure. If he can maintain a live in girlfriend at 26, trust he knows how to plan as well as execute. Erica have a plan that does not include what he is going to do and that is the foundation of a soft life.

[@Dawgyjoe]

Why can’t more years be added?

[@KT-pw1cq]

I only watched this halfway through.. but I follow her on TikTok and she already left him before when they were dating in college because he was hesitant committing to her as boyfriend/girlfriend. She left then ran into each other then the rest was history. So im not sure if ultimatums will work again in her favor..

[@TeeTee-2016]

If he’s not ready to get married then, why would she want to shack up with him. In fact, they’re not really shacking up, she just lives with him. She thinks that dressing up and putting on makeup every day will keep a man. Many women do that. That man doesn’t want to get married. She talks about what her parents are telling her but, what is his family telling him. That man has so many other women to choose from, especially when moving across country. She even said that his family is not marriage minded. I would love to know what happens by December 24th. She better wake up and stop waiting because he’s not waiting. That man is in the prime of his life and his options are not limited.

[@XxMercuriiXx]

He told her she’s going to be his wife , so…..

[@SylisDaGoldenPeach]

Ashley laughs with her mouth closed , that’s different.

[@wm8673]

Naw, That is ol skool classy 😊

[@perleeartisanat2235]

I love her laugh so much 🤣

[@obaakitua1]

I do same because I don't like my smile.

[@obaakitua1]

How old is the bf of Destiny?

[@mylestonah_kruezeeznk8214]

😂😂😂

[@hellothere8347]

Bria 30 looking 20 talking about some, “I’m 30” age don’t mean nothing

[@MzAqua]

Exactly, she looks gooood! She can definitely turn her life around 👏

[@kfner23]

Your first mistake was moving in and acting like a wife, without being a wife.

[@Jamcore2008]

Think home girl should realize that’s her dec date is her date to move on and not his date to propose . As long as she respects her date it’s all good.

[@teal1010]

These women brag about these relationships and embarrass themselves when the men won’t marry them!

[@HB-pi2ew]

Not Ashley reuploading this because she saw Erica going viral 😭🤭🤭 oop

[@jesslvrde6027]

I love the talk she had with Bria

[@f.-j.j.5738]

I'm a hardcore Christian woman too. I don't understand professing God but living differently than what He commands. It's not even about marrying the man at this point. But if he's comfortable living with you unmarried then he does not uphold the Christian values he should have. Do you really want to marry a man who does not submit to God? It's time to move out, stay celibate, take time to repent and heal.