How Being Autistic feeds my Generalised Anxiety Disorder

While everyone feels anxious sometimes, I have pervasive and intense anxiety that impacts every aspect of my life, only I didn't realise that's what it was until I received an official diagnosis.
My autism means I experience the mother load of my anxiety somatically, rather than mentally. As such, I have spent much of my life itching, aching, and feeling generally worn out and exhausted. I stopped trying to find answers from the medical profession about these physical manifestations years ago after every test I ever got sent for came back with 'nothing-to-see-here', or 'healthiest person I've ever seen' (exaggeration but that's what it felt like). How could I be so well and yet feel so tired and ill all the time? The answer is now clear - I'm autistic and I'm anxious.
In this video, I describe Generalised Anxiety Disorder, and Primal Fears and then discuss my own personal relationship with anxiety and the every-day situations that trigger me.
While it is difficult living with such a nervous constitution, I've definitely tried to tackle it head-on and have rarely let it stop me from doing anything. I'd like to think that's because I'm brave but the reality is, for most of my life I had no clue why everything felt so hard and hit me so deep so I'd literally just feel the fear and do it anyway. While that strategy has definitely got me to where I am today, it didn't come without a few scars and scary mental burnout. I'm making this video in the hope that it may help others recognise the anxiety that lies within them and orientates them towards a path of self-acceptance and safety. Take care and look after yourselves.

[@niamhira]

I also have GAD. I got this diagnosis even before the autism diagnosis. At first, I didn't believe it, because I thought that for GAD I must be always in panic. It was a while ago, but I'm still trying trying to come to terms with it and I'm still learning new things about my anxiety

[@tracirex]

thanks for breaking this down and for sharing your personal experience. this is a good blueprint for anyone to follow if they are interested in exploring their inner landscape. very much appreciated ❤

[@suddenlyautistic]

Thanks for the feedback. I found it useful to unpack and examine again as there is always more to learn.

[@emily-jayne1554]

please keep sharing the amazing information x I love watching your videos as an AuADHD person

[@51elephantchang]

And 99% of the time my fears are unfounded yet frustratingly I can't shake them off.

[@suddenlyautistic]

I understand. It is very draining, but I we must carry on doing the best we can. Thank you for sharing

[@anacarolmsc]

Thank you so much for sharing, very useful!

[@stevegreenwood7837]

it was helpful thank you . just subscribed

[@suddenlyautistic]

Thank you and welcome along.

[@artemisXsidecross]

Modernity, consciousness, and anxiety are bundled and each can infer the other two. It needs not to be an obstruction. That it can be manifested as a disorder is not the same as it being among our existential concerns. I found reading The Dawn of Everything: A New History of Humanity: by David Graeber and David Wengrow helpful to place anxiety as an ally and not only an obstruction. ☀

[@suddenlyautistic]

Thank you. I don't see anxiety as an obstruction in itself. More having an anxiety disorder IS debilitating and being autistic makes this quite difficult to tone down. I am interested in the book you mentioned and will look it up. I hope it doesn't try telling me that there's no such thing as autism though as that would be a shame 🥰

[@artemisXsidecross]

@@suddenlyautistic I have autism and did not speak until the age of three and it took three years to reach the second grade in middle school. Born in the mid 1940's they had no name for me, autism then was for the non verbal or yet to be toilet trained adults. The DSM 4 and 5 on autism was not even read until almost 25 years ago. At my age of 78, I learned 'duck and cover' to be functional. My ability to read and write language was developed on my own after age 25. ☀

[@artemisXsidecross]

@@suddenlyautistic I am again rereading The Dawn of Everything: A New History of Humanity: by David Graeber and David Wengrow and it is NOT telling you or anyone ‘…that there's no such thing as autism…’. In fact it may be stating that autism and its cascade of secondary behaviors our a warning that modernity itself is a problem; the autism that we experience may be a warning as is ‘the canary in the coal mine’ is of a potential danger.

[@suddenlyautistic]

@artemis sidecross I read that a few months ago, it was a very interesting book, and I agree, the problems are with society.

[@artemisXsidecross]

@@suddenlyautistic Thank you for your response, autism may be a reflection of modernity and its manifestation is relative to it, not an absolute. I do wonder if in a pre-agriculture and pre-industrial era autism was a significant diversion from what is described today as neurotypical. I live on the western edge of North America and while our time difference is vast, our consensus is not.

[@nellygs702]

Tremendously helpful !

[@ayoolukoga9829]

Come unto me, all ye that Labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. Matthew 11:29

[@suddenlyautistic]

What's this about then?

[@ayoolukoga9829]

@@suddenlyautistic This is about Jesus who Died for your Sins, Would you like to be Saved and Go to Heaven? Follow this 3 Step Guide to be Saved: Step 1: Admit that you are a Sinner For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God Romans 3:23 Because you have Sinned Against a Holy God, God as a Holy Judge must Punish Sinners to a Burning Hell. Step 2: Believe that Jesus is God and that he Came down on Earth to Die for your Sins, Was Crucified, Buried and Ressurected for you Step 3: Call out to God to Saved you If you do not know the Words to Say to God, Repeat this Prayer: Dear God, I know that I am a Sinner and I believe that Jesus is God, Who Died for my Sins and I am Trusting on Jesus Christ alone to Save me. Thank you for Saving Me, In Jesus Name I Pray. Amen. Congratulations, if you said this Prayer with all Your Heart then you are Saved