How Does a Christian Woman Handle a Narcissistic Husband?

[@Kris_Reece]

Grab your FREE Toxic People Survival Guide krisreece.com/toxic-people-guide

[@martinaduvenhage1952]

What did you do Kris, while waiting for your release? Did you carry on with your marriage relationship or distance yourself from your husband and just focus on God?

[@faithmakwiranzou8422]

Kris what did you do in those 9 years, did you continue to make love to him? Did you live with him like everything is normal while you focused on God? How did you carry yourself around him especially going through all the toxicity?

[@laryani15]

I was married to a narcissistic pastor for 8 years. I’ve never been so depressed in my life than in those years. I wanted to die so badly cause I thought divorce is a huge sin and I really didn’t want to continue in that toxic marriage. But one day I was like you Kris, I thought I don’t care anymore if divorce is a sin, I just wanted to be out so badly! But the worst came after, he started talking bad about me to the entire church and bc he was a pastor, everyone believed him and turned their back on me. Don’t be surprised if you’re now married to a narcissistic and everyone around you including the court be on their side, cause they would play a victim and everyone would feel sorry for him. And remember, these narcissistic people are smart, manipulative, deceptive, they would turn around stories and they are a very good and smooth in talking so everyone would believe their story.

[@renesouthafrica]

How do i know if i am the narcissist or not pls advise

[@beautifultruth4777]

Kris how did you navigate interaction between your husband and yourself during the 9 years before you were released?

[@Matthew-cz3gk]

God delivered my narcissistic husband!! With God all things are possible!!

[@jamiebrumant8512]

Amen

[@allisonayalaeaves4755]

Amen!! praying for the day mine is delivered 🙌🏾

[@Awhis1]

@@Matthew-cz3gk can you share with me how God deliver him please?

[@Matthew-cz3gk]

@@Awhis1 I was married to him for over 20 years before God revealed that I was dealing with an evil spirit. I started following Jesus wholeheartedly and then the narcissistic abuse got worse. I was contemplating divorce on many occasions but God would not permit me to divorce him. So then I began to literally war in prayer for my husband’s soul. It took two years but God set Him free. He is now living for Christ!!!

[@daughteroftherisenking]

Praise the Lord 😭🦾🤍🙏🏼 God bless you

[@ruthkoning6036]

I was married for 31 years to a porn addicted "Christian" narcissist . He controlled our finances so I was trapped. It took me 20 years to find language for the abuse I was living in. We went to counseling but it was more damaging for me because he used the things I shared to gain more control. I finally got out 4 years ago and for 2 of those years he stalked me and the police had to get involved. The divorce process took 4 years because he used this to try keep me. As of Friday I AM FREE Thank you for sharing this video.

[@DJH97]

Oh my word. 30 years for me. Same scenario. Scoped out women right in front of me. Porn. Girlie magazines etc. All the men in the family were the same and one was a pastor. Cause “Eve ate the apple” was what we women heard all the time. Wish I would’ve found Kris earlier. I’ve watched many narcissistic info videos after counselor told me my narcissistic husband was “passive aggressive “. Well. That was just the beginning of my education.

[@Kelle0284]

@@DJH97 There's nothing in scripture that says that eve ate an apple.

[@christinabrown5499]

I have been married to one for almost 25 years. I want to be free so badly!! I have no money saved and can’t get out, so I’m just trusting God. His grace is sufficient and I know He will bring beauty from my ashes! We tried counseling with our pastor once. He went in there and lied and exaggerated, so I will never do that again. I’m praying for God to open his eyes!! I didn’t know about this disorder until 14 months ago. Learning about it and seeking God has healed me so much.

[@ladybugblu60]

@@DJH97 beware of those in the pulpits because that's a hiding place for them.

[@rhondaredeemedprodigal]

Oh my goodness 😭. That's so terrible 😢. I'm glad you're finally Free 🙂💘. I'm going through some hell of my own

[@rosehealy2705]

I was married to a nassitius for 41 years and then the Lord released me. The Lord is so dear and precious to me.

[@rosebettencourt8928]

She is right.. I just left a 16 year toxic, covert narcissist.. I was a minister..I prayed hard.. spent hours every day with God.. did everything in the book and I drew very close to God as he began to open my eyes to the severity of the situation. I had no voice, no money, isolated from friends and took care of his dysfunctional drug addict and narcissistic family and had to ignore my own, Stripped of everything, micromanaged my every move, recorded calls, suspended my phone. I had so much before I met him and lost it all.. After I received deliverance from the dark forces that drew me into such horror.. God RELEASED ME. I moved away and God even released any grief or sorrow.. to the point where I don’t miss or desire to return to the vomit. When God releases you.. it is a whole different ball game! Love yourself

[@bronzinagordon9512]

Oh my God🙏never knew so many suffered like me!!! I'm waiting ..26yrs now...to be released...have to..my tears ..I thought I had mo me.. are streaming silently now...how can one person take all this abuse and not die on the inside?!😢...the loss of things is 1 thing ...but to lose what you have in Christ😢😢😢😢

[@lisasmith4958]

This is my situation right here

[@claracb1512]

That's me too. God in His mercy is delivering me and giving me clarity

[@emmaculatemenzeiwa]

I'm in the verge of leaving a 23 marriage because I've been stripped off everything in the name of a Christian. I'm done and God is showing me the way out. Thank you Jesus

[@H0meN0w]

Going thru this now with my husband & man it’s a mental mind blow. I was told there’s no cure but I’m praying. God help us all 😢

[@AleksandraAltynai]

Dear God! Heavenly Father! Please! Either release me, or change my situation! I beg you in the name of Jesus.

[@tg5732]

My daughter is married to a narcissist. We are praying. It is so hard as a mother to see the pain her husband causes her. I sent her this video. Thankyou for making this video. She is so tired and depressed. They have a 2 year old and a 6 month old. My heart breaks for them.Pray for my daughter please.

[@cindyreeves5048]

Yes…I prayed, I fasted, I had everyone praying for me, I tried to reason with him, find resolve but nothing made a dent. The day I decided to leave my verbally abusive alcoholic husband (whom I believe could be diagnosed with NPD) was the day I posed the question to myself: “if one of my daughters were the woman in this relationship & told me how he was treating her, what would I do?” I’d tell them I’ll be right there to help you pack; you’re moving in with me! So I took my own advice, put what I needed in my car & drove away. It’s been several weeks now. I left the state, went to family and filed for divorce. 😢 I don’t feel happy, but I have peace. I still constantly pray for him, but now I’m sleeping and able to swallow again. I was that nerve-wracked and tense. 💔

[@dilciaenid57]

I’m divorcing my Narc husband. We have 5 & 3 year old. Am keeping them, and me, safe.

[@margaretcollins4925]

My daughters too , I suffered narcissistic abuse from him and his family but I escaped but now my daughters are suffering! ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@mariskagolden7308]

❤🙏

[@florabraswell8423]

Bless her heart and yours too ! Prays 🙏🙏🙏

[@GeraldaZainalvand]

You said that unless there is a abuse there is no grounds for leaving the narcissist, but the narcissist behavior is abuse.

[@miller5170]

The tantrum of a child is a perfect way to explain the state of mind a narcissist is in. They are content for a while with the lollipop 🍭 until you take it away.

[@ritarivera9320]

my husband does the same thing he used his family to leave the home & were separated now were back together.. I want to see if he would change . I believe go can do all things but when I ask him about work or he gets inferiorate & says I'm accusing ..when im just trying to resolve other issues

[@Maria__57]

@@miller5170 To be saved the narc... will have want to be saved..& It could happen .. But generaly. they are so...far gone & wrapped up in sin..that. it becomes. Impossibile...

[@nana820able]

46 years with a narcissist husband he's only gotten worse. When he gets angry he yells and screams at me and calls me nasty names. He lies about everything and it is not only destroying my health but I can barely function. I just want peace.

[@june4033]

I understand! Been with my narcissist husband for 50 years this year. I didn’t know that he was a narcissist until about 5 years ago. I just thought he was mean jerk. Both Christian’s, so you know, you don’t get divorced. The last couple of years I’ve been reading about not staying with them. I’ve been so afraid and I am so sick. Like you barely functioning. Walking on eggs shells constantly. This was a good episode to hear. I’ll pray for you.

[@nana820able]

@@june4033 I had never heard the word narcissist until two years ago. Also raised in a Christian home so my family always encouraged me to make it work. As I've gotten older I've come to understand this isn't a marriage as God intended. There isn't nor will there ever be a partnership, a closeness or even sharing. I've become reclusive and I'm exploring ways of leaving so I can have that peace and remove the harsh feelings I have towards him. I've no desire to ever marry again and have felt that way since I was 40 years old. I'll pray for you too. I do not believe God wants us to stay in abusive relationships.

[@lorrainem8234]

I have been with a narcissist for over 30 years and it is also affecting my health. I'll be praying for all of you 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

[@nana820able]

@@lorrainem8234 I will you as well.

[@lorrainem8234]

@@nana820able Thank you 🤗

[@deborahlacy7031]

I went to my pastor and his wife numerous times for at least 10 years but my husband never changed however, one day someone said to me that maybe I was praying the wrong way. I said, I don't want him to die, I just want away from him. The next day I started praying daily that if my husband was not going to straighten up, then I ask God to remove him from our home. Within 2 months of praying this same prayer daily, my husband moved out, and I helped him move and gave him any and all decorations in our house that would make his new place be more homey for him. I knew God was totally behind this and I praised him every step of the way.

[@claireluckensmeyer7489]

I have asked for this...waiting

[@saundracohen4032]

Thanks for sharing.

[@sharontutani2713]

@@deborahlacy7031 makes sense

[@sharonbarker5751]

My husband gaslights, he gives the silent treatment for days. He is a liar, he goes places, while never telling me where he’s going, or how long he will be gone. He appears to get pleasure from being cruel, he is rude, he speaks to his family and our dogs with kindness, and speaks to me in a totally different tone. He NEVER apologizes-under ANY circumstances, EVER. He gets his feelings hurt constantly! I have to weigh out everything I say before speaking. He can even get offended if you offer to do something for him. That’s a sign that you think he’s stupid. He accuses me of things that he does. In fact, the very things that he does, he accuses me of. He is an alcoholic, passing out drunk, yet denies it. I begged him to go have a physical. He would say, “no, I’m perfect. You’re just trying to speak negative things on me.” Then on October 15th 2022, he had a massive brain stem stroke, and is paralyzed on his right side. Then four months ago, he had TWO heart attacks. He is now back to getting drunk every day, and eating nothing but junk. He is incapable of having a normal conversation. He doesn’t even know how. I’m sorry this is so long. I’m just venting. I feel like I’m going to have a stroke myself, if I don’t get away from him. He is the most passive aggressive person I have ever been around. He is constantly playing games, and bragging about being able to mess with people. Who does that? He has NEVER been affectionate, in fact he’s cold! He doesn’t tell me he loves me, he doesn’t hold my hand, nothing. He says the woman should ask for sex if she wants it-she’s the door keeper. It’s SO creepy and weird. Living with him is hell. The problem is that I’m a Christian. I pray every day, and never miss Mass on Sundays. I feel like I’m drowning:( I started watching this video, and now I’m going to go back and finish it. I pray it has the advice I need. Oh wow! Amen Sister-done!

[@dustisiljenberg8339]

This is my husband !

[@isabellemarienoelle]

Same! I can pray and nothing happens. Never miss mass either …

[@katoyireaohwonigho8574]

Sound like my current situation 😢 I found these videos. Asking God what should I do. But until then I will remain quiet and distant. He now sleeps in the spare room

[@sharonbarker5751]

@@katoyireaohwonigho8574 I’m so sorry you are going through this. Just know that you are not alone.

[@DH-jd8gq]

Spend some time away and pray. You don't need to go to mass for God to hear you, He is with you where ever you are. He sees all that is going on and He cares about you. Call on the name of Jesus and talk to Him. He wants you to cast your cares on Him so He can carry your burdens. You just need to invite Him into the situation and then listen to His voice on what to do next and be obedient and do what He instructs.

[@dottiEpre]

I’m hear to testify that God has turned it around for me. My husband has been changed and it was all through God speaking directly to his heart through prayer , the Word and a Holy Spirit filled Christian counselor. There was a time He had no interest in counseling, respecting me or anything. Talking to Him wasn’t working anymore. I truly feel loved and valued again by my husband. Be constant in prayer ladies and I thank God for this video because I literally thought my husband was possessed and didn’t even know what to pray. He was covert. I listened to this video and it described the exact change in my husband. Stop talking and start praying against this Narcissistic demon. It was a long two years of pain and confusion for me before God restored my husband.

[@barboranovotna6070]

He likely did not have the disorder, just few narcissistic traits.

[@rosalindr4975]

Rare . Thanks for sharing

[@EmilyGS31]

Thank you, this is encouraging.

[@rhondawallace4090]

I do not agree with you that there are only two reasons for divorce. If a man is emotionally and mentally abusing his wife to the point where she has a nervous breakdown- God does not expect a woman to endure that type of treatment The Bible speaks of abandonment as a reason for divorce. Emotional abandonment is a real thing, is extremely damaging and can be worse than physical abandonment

[@SandraMittry]

I agree with you Rhonda. I stayed with a covert narcissistic abusive husband for 31 years because I was taught that the only reason I could divorce him was because of infidelity. My pastor said that my husband broke the "marriage covenant" by being abusive emotionally, psychologically and once physically. Jesus said that if a man only looks at a woman with lust in his heart that he has already committed adultery in his heart. Narcissists are well known for "flirting" with other women in looking for the next possible "narcissistic supply" or replacement target/victim. My husband was very secretive, as most of them are, and I found an email in his computer after we separated where he was hiding the fact that he was having an emotional affair with another woman. My husband's lust problem was a daily battle for him. He always flirted with other women in my presence and always made me feel so uncomfortable. God does not intend for his daughters to suffer abuse of any kind. God calls every believer to conform to the image of Christ. To be "Christlike", to display the fruit of the Spirit which starts with "love". God is Love. Everything about the narcissist is contrary to what God's Word says a true believer is. Shaneen Meghi does a great job describing all the demonic influences and spirits affecting those who call themselves "Christian" when in fact they are being influenced by demonic spirits. Manipulation and control are NOT of God. This is a spirit of witchcraft. Narcissists are also pathological liars! Who is the father of lies? Satan! The Bible clearly states that no "liars" will enter the kingdom of God. Those who make it a habit or a continual practice to lie will not be entering heaven unless they repent of their wicked ways! God can do anything including change a narcissist, but they must be willing to admit their evil ways, but because they are blind to their ways, even though they KNOW right from wrong and KNOW that what they are doing is WRONG, they CHOOSE to continue to do evil and ignore God's truth about these matters.

[@gabrielamartiniuc6322]

Abuse is never ok with God. If a husband is toxic and abusive emotionally, is grounds for divorce

[@yianlee3278]

@@SandraMittry. Totally Agree with you. I am in this for 29 years. Extremely exhausted until i leave him alone as if he does not exist.

[@teriecekuykendall4622]

My love, you and the others please listen again, she clearly mentions that type of abuse!!!!

[@authenticme5708]

Did you know that when God hates divorce, he's speaking about the spiritual divorce the abuser did when he left God. The abuser is divorced from God to be the abuser. I left a husband for the abuse. He wasn't willing to repent. Toxic Christianity teaches you have to stay in abuse. I suggest you do some innerwork so that you do not pick another abuser. When God shows me a man with godly character, I'll marry him. God is not in black and white. A person who doesn't turn from their ways, they are still manipulating, and that's the devil's work.

[@ruthmacharia1784]

I left my narcissist husband Three months ago after 6years in marriage with 2 kids and this was the best decision I have ever made.Narcissts never change

[@sharonericson480]

They seldom change, unless they submit, seek and cling to God. Through Him, all things are possible.

[@jdmciviczc]

what made you choose him in the first place ?

[@user-lo9po5mp5u]

They are filled with demons

[@MrsDazl]

Had a close female friend (my former teacher, 95y.o.) tell me the same thing. Listen to other women, ladies.

[@dawntate6723]

Hi Kris, this is Dawn. I think I'm the Dawn that asked you the question that you made this video about. I just came across the video tonight - 2 years later. I've been divorced from him for a year and a half now. I just couldn't live with his craziness anymore. I know it wasn't Biblical reason but i was setting a horrible example for my daughter's of taking way too much in my marriage. I'm free and at peace most of the time now but still struggle sometimes. Thank you so much for what you do.

[@katesims2346]

Doesn't have to be physical to be abuse. There is also financial and emotional abuse, possibly others. These are the 2 I know about. Been married 22 years and only found out recently that I'm living under these two. Would have left years ago if I'd realised.

[@skillsetcounseling]

That sounds tough, so sorry you’re found through this. The book, The Emotionally Destructive Marriage by Leslie Vernick, provides information about how to deal with financial and emotional abuse in a marriage.

[@francinebriones1718]

you still can may GOD open a door no one can shut Amen prayers for your journey 🙏👣⚓️🕊🌹

[@rosalindr4975]

Can relate after 4 1/2 years here

[@jessicacisneros6952]

I am a christian counselor married to a narcissist and I agree wirh everything you've said! I'm still waiting for God's direction

[@KarlaAyers]

Just know you are not the only one in the SAME situation.

[@jennytaylor6476]

Amen! 33 years of covert-ness along with sadistic-ness. SO many lies, affairs etc. Etc. God and faith is the only thing that got me thru my chronic illness, surgery and seeing things OH SO clearly. Then I worked on me and my codependency issues while separated. We tried couples and individual counseling before and thru separation but it was clear he was never going to change. I waited and waited and prayed patiently for over a year. There was no choice but to pursue divorce. I just am sad for my children….I’m now in a much happier place and on the road to healthier day by day!! What she said is true - God doesn’t expect nor ask us to stay and be abused mentally OR physically!! I almost lost my soul so please put you and your children first before this happens. You will have a very hard road but in the end you will get your life back!

[@albywhite6827]

Thank you. Needed to read this

[@cindyreeves5048]

Jenny! I pray you are well. I just left my husband a few weeks ago. It’s amazing how shocking life is without constant torment & abuse. But I’m liking it!

[@martinewaeyenbergh9502]

Joling and meaning don't get you nothing Divorce , beware most will stalk you ! Don't listen to this ,No man will ever be my Boss .I knew this from childhood ¡Be Free , independent. m

[@barbaragraham-siegenthaler]

Sound exactly like my story. Thank you for sharing this!

[@visionvixxen]

So happy! Praying for you…

[@sherryo7315]

I grew up with a narcissistic mother. No wonder I married a narcissist. He was emotionally and sexually abusive to me for our entire 34 years together. He was emotionally and physically abusive to our children. The day I left the marriage, he was physically abusive to me and I have the photos to prove it. Never the less, Heavenly Father pushed me to leave that horrible excuse for a man and I was afraid. Once I was out and on my own, I was praying and in the middle of my prayer God made it known to me that He told me I'd be ok and I then knew He was right. God brought me to a wonderful Christian man who has been so good to me for the past ten years! Getting out of a bad marriage is the best thing you can do for yourself!

[@lilyamongbrambles4458]

Sad how we get abused and messed up good by our "mothers" and then walk right into the arms of another abuser, thinking he will protect us,lol. I just finally figured out at 52 that my mother has npd and my ex was a covert npd. I would love to find a good man but don't know if I could ever trust anyone again. Glad to hear you had a happy ending.

[@chantalrodriguez5269]

I'm in a narcissistic marriage , I'm so afraid of getting a divorce 😫 what if God wants me to stay and he will change?

[@nicholecornes1915]

​@@chantalrodriguez5269God does not want you to be with satan

[@DH-jd8gq]

​@@chantalrodriguez5269You can always separate for a time without getting divorced. A time to pray and seek God.

[@writer1986]

Yes, the confusion. I've been married to a covertly narcissist man for 5 years, and I didn't realize it until we had our firstborn. My husband is self-centered, sensitive, rageful, negative, arrogant, easily jealous, you name it (plus all the sweet stuff that makes me go "Ah, this is why I married him"). It took me physically leaving for him to fall off his pedestal and agree to therapy. The changes are slow, but I'm now strong and assertive, and my husband is more thoughtful and gentle towards our kids and me.... Thank you, Lord, indeed, for staying with me and my family all this time.

[@juliannarenk1803]

Any update or tips?

[@CreateKingdomPlans]

Yes update please

[@triplekids3]

God’s timing is perfect, I was married 33 years to covert narc husband, God said too me put your trust in me, and on August 28/2015, I did, and on August 28/2020 I left all the toxic people in my life, I’m now on my healing journey, and I give God the glory!

[@johenderson7786]

My husband doesn't even tell me he loves me and hasn't told me for years. No physical abuse but a fair amount of verbal abuse....not as much as he use to give. We just had our 40 anniversay and I can honestly say I haven't felt loved for 30 years. At the time of our anniversay I discovered narcissism on youtube. I am like mom or at least that is how I feel, and I am very tired of being the housekeeper. I want to be loved....not used. He has all 7 signs you stated in covert narcissist video. I care about him but I can honestly say I don't love him anymore. And my relationship with God has gone down hill for the last 40 years and I want God back in my life very much....I will have Him back!

[@feliciajames5032]

I'm so sorry that you've endured this for so long. I'm 46 and divorced my narcissist ex-husband 12 years ago and I was 34 yrs old at the time. We we married for 9.5 years. We had 2 children together. I separated myself from him when I was 31. Long story short, he was the arrogant narcissist, who knew it all, did no wrong and everything was everybody else fault. It was all about him, his timing & he belittled others so he felt better about himself or so he could control the atmosphere or energy in whatever room he was in. His mother told me not to marry him because he was low down, and God rest her soul, she didn't even realize that her son was a narcissist. I didn't even know until we were divorced for nearly 3 years. I would be dead if I stayed with him. Not because he was abusive but because he wasn't loving or empathetic. He would laugh or get pleasure in seeing us (his wife & children) sad or hurt. Leaving him was the very best decision I ever made because 12 years later, he's still the same. But I've been remarried for 3.5 years to the absolute most loving, caring, empathetic, and humble man ever. It breaks my heart that you've lived 30 years of your marriage basically unloved. Praying for you!🙏

[@talshaharfamily]

I had a toxic wife and endured abuse for 16 years. I felt it was a duty to love her. I was literally blinded the whole time. She died and I remarried shortly afterwards where my 2nd wife showed me all the abuse I suffered. Literally scales fell off and I rushed to counseling. I still have issues but God has been faithful.

[@wedesiregodministries1851]

GOOD LESSON SIS. MY HEART GOES OUT TO THOSE WOMEN WHO HAS A NARCISSTIC HUSBAND

[@Kris_Reece]

Thank you Steve.

[@maryshalom33]

I just have come to realize that I’m married to a “christian” narcissist with traits. We been together for 20 years. Im finally building up the courage to tell him that I want space away from him and I don’t feel guilty in front of God for feeling this way. The Lord knows how much tears and hurt I have been in, Im so unhappy in this marriage. I feel like my wings have been clipped and been put in a cage. 😭😭😭

[@doryhill563]

Exactly feel the same

[@bronzinagordon9512]

I hear you loud and clear 😢...so unfair...trapped...dying slowly becoz you luv God?!😢...staying coz of kids?! 😢I hear you...🙏

[@liezebartsch-wx2wf]

I feel exactly the same, always sad and my natural exuberance totally gone, always sad and traumatised, been going through 6 years of this.

[@cindysanchez9808]

Hang in their sister, you have a crown of long-suffering waiting for you. I am still with my narrsassist 36 years. 12 kids 19 grandchildren. I won't divorce but I must leave because of financial abuse the last thing he has left, and because it ruining my health. If God gives me a miracle I might return. I may never return. I've been here for the kids. Baby is 12. I don't think I can go 6 more years. I might have to leave early. May the Lord bless and keep us all and give us the wisdom to know when, how, and if. We should go. Amen

[@liezebartsch-wx2wf]

@@cindysanchez9808 Thankyou dearest Cindy. I pray for you and me and so many others in the same situation. I’m still with my husband. Sometimes if I see signs he was with another woman it feels if I have a heart attack and I can’t breathe. But always I cry out to the Lord to help me and all my sisters out there going through the same and I have moments in which I have peace and gratitude for small simple things. God bless you and may He see us and lead us and give us wisdom. Hugs

[@terrihunt522]

Thank you for this information, I’ve been married to an arrogant narcissist for way too long. It has messed me up health wise, mentally and emotionally. I’ve been praying so hard for God to help him to change but God doesn’t. I see now that staying in this harsh abuse is is going to destroy me. Please pray for me as I try to focus on getting myself back to being healthy and totally focused on.God.

[@abba7707]

Hi there, do not give into fear, especially what ppl will say in the church. Do not let him destroy you and everything around you. 🤗

[@gracegiven3182]

Praying for you. God wants your husband to change, but this only happens when the person is willing. God gave us free will-it’s not God’s fault or that He isn’t answering prayers. It is on your husband to repent and to call on God’s power to enable him to do the hard work that is necessary to overcome sin and narcissistic behavior.

[@goldentransitions7985]

Praying for you in Jesus name ❤

[@Nix-theMiracle]

To anyone battling in this situation, pray Psalm 31 out loud in earnest - it is powerful! I have seen the power of God’s Word in this way. God bless you. God’s Word is absolute truth, it is the very fabric of reality, use it and declare it over yourself and your home and your relationships. Bless you!

[@brandibee7058]

This is true after years of praying I finally read this pslam and a few others the lord showed me . God helped me live out the word and had me set some boundaries I also fast to hear from the lord then do as he leads and my marriage is turning around :) my husband never apologized and was very emotionally abusive I would respond in pain which can be seen emotionally abusive too as I fed on a gods word I started learning how God wanted me to respond and in tjme things started to turn around and my husband started repenting . We still have a ways but I def am seeing the lord working in his life :)

[@Health-zp2eh]

True do Not acsept Abuse walk away as they also love is controll walk off Let them deal with Thier own inner Issus

[@janetvarghese5248]

Thank you so much Kris.. Yes,taking our focus off from our narc spouse and focussing on JESUS is what gives us peace and keeps us going...

[@shelbydiorrr387]

I ask anyone who reads this to pray for meand have faith that my children and I will be released by God of my childrens father. Its been 7 years, adultery, abuse substance abuse and lying. Please anyone thay prays for us, I ask our good Lord to bless and praise you and from me, i thank you for such a kind and loving gesture

[@Shelb13v]

1 peter 3

[@CAmom75]

I'm about to be free after 25 years of marriage. What caused so much damage, is that I came from a house of Christian parents who were both narcissists, especially my mother. She was very controlling. And when I married my husband, she was right there to back him up any time I complained about anything. Then once we finally had kids, I felt so stuck. 😶

[@superMrsMaddox]

My covert n-ist husband started a new job today and I've been enjoying my time alone today to work on a quilt. And since he's not around, I was treating myself to some "educational" videos to learn more about my situation - being married to a n-ist. So I decided to review the temperaments, because that doesn't focus on his n-ist tendancies, but might could give some insights into relating to him.... I saw this video on the list by one of those videos, so I had to hit my back button to come back to it. Your words - God's word released me from trying to figure out if I should stay or if I should go. The word "released" just reached out and grabbed my heart, because that is exactly what I felt in that moment - I even finished that sentence with you. God will tell me what He wants me to do in His own time. I know this. I know He is in the process of revealing to me who He created me to be COMPLETELY before I ever even met my husband. I've always had great faith in knowing that every little thing that reaches me has been filtered through His grace and/or mercy - even the abuse I endured. He protected our children, who are now adults who love Jesus and are pursuing Him to this day. I have no idea who I will end up being, but I will most certainly tell of His great faithfulness to me!!

[@DJH97]

Dealt with narcissistic so called “Christian “ husband and his family for 30 years. Prayed and prayed for God to help it and He ended up releasing me. Thank you God for getting out with some sanity left.

[@BlueJean751]

I have finally awakened after 48 years of marriage!!! There is a long story that goes with this. I've realized after this amount of time, decades of strong prayer, my husband has gotten worst. Iam dealing with a covert narcissist and bi polar in him. Currently educating myself, and slowly working my way out of this unholy alliance, as it is NOT a Gods marriage covenant.... I disagree with Ms Reece, that we should just separate. It would be dangerous for an empath to separate, get help to heal from abuse... only to go back into the demonic trap of a narcissistic spouse. That empath will go thru double hell and punishment from the narcissistic spouse!!! Even if...my spouse would change which is highly unrealistic, I must stay away. Nearly 50 years of hell is enough to leave a lasting emprint. Food for thought.

[@barboranovotna6070]

It is so and for example Catholic church teaches this better than the Protestant church and nullifies those marriages with people with NPD because they cannot be possibly valid from the beginning! A person with the disorder has no right to get married as a holy union, and so, until they heal, they are not married! As simple as that!

[@tagladyify]

Thank you for this. You have just confirmed the conclusions I have come to after 40 years of turmoil.

[@vikkigrenier2978]

Try 52 yrs... I'm so drained... its hard to care ..he is now ill with cancer...and still his narcissistic self... he seems made at me because he is sick..but I'm still caring for him the best I can... I'm sad and scared .. sad that I don't feel much love for him and scared because I've never been alone... he's a Christian and yes I love Jesus!..... your story made me feel not so alone... I always knew something was wrong and thought I'm the crazy one.. depression and suicidal thought rang in my soul all the time, but I had 6 kids to take care of.. but the passed few months I discovered you and Dr C and it has opened my eyes to the truth and reality of the situation!.... so thank you for sharing!....God Bless you!...

[@jukes243]

I am married to a covert narc. I have known for 30 years that things weren't right. He lied about the smallest of things plus he loves the ladies. Two years ago, I gave him over to God. Now, I am hearing this. I believe I did the right thing by telling him to leave. We are still married but have been separated for 12 years. I just turned 70.

[@monicahocking1507]

Hi. Sounds similar to me. 44 years married left 2 years ago at age 66. Not divorced but it almost killed me. I'm catholic, divorce wasn't an option but Jesus never said anything about separation. Sadly some of our children are like him.

[@daisyy99]

He could easily run up debts that put you out on the street. Plan for your own self care. You are young enough to be live in nanny for example....

[@lesliecox8121]

I just wanted to thank you for making these videos. It was such a relief to realize that I'm not losing my mind. My husband is a covert narcissist. Every sign you gave fits him like a glove, almost like you know what him personally. We have been married for a really long 20 years. I do not have ANY way of leaving. I don't know what to do anymore. God bless you. Again thank you so much.

[@marcydelgenio8169]

Hi.. I am in the same way..in Feb it will be 12 years for me and I didn't realize until just recently after an event where he showed his colors. Just wanted to reach out to you...wondering how you are?

[@elenabogdan3874]

What I can’t understand is, how can a Christian be a narcissist, and how can a narcissist be a Christian? They go to church, some are in full time ministry! I can’t reconcile these two! Can anyone explain?

[@esthersahu9916]

Yes just how the Pharisees were in Jesus's time hypocrite. I have dealt with a similar person a minister. Angel and demon in one person. Very hard to detect . People will never believe you if you shared the type of abuse he did because of his good presentation.

[@yogib8]

I just stumbled upon your videos But I divorced him… after 14 years I couldn’t do it any longer , I was just becoming someone else… he was all 3 …. I’m now in my healing process… in therapy and allowing God to put my life back together again. They DO NOT CHANGE even in separation!

[@lindaj7559]

I am Christian and did the praying. And I prayed for either that he would turn it around or release me. Suddenly my husband decided to leave.

[@marilynng4337]

I forgot to mentioned I stayed 18.5 years I was so close to God put I was dying inside Now I am even closer to God and I am free thriving and feeling amazing I love our amazing God and his word Psalms 27:10

[@chantalrodriguez5269]

What happened? Did you stay with him? Did he change?

[@gypsybelle637]

Thank you. My exhusband was a narcissist, and so is my 40 year old daughter. I needed this so much! I love her, she's my child. I have to step away , for my own health, and love from a distance.🙏🏼GOD, BLESS YOU ALL!

[@dybounds]

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU Kris!! I spent 12 years with a covert narcissist husband (currently going through a divorce). After growing up with a narcissistic older sister (covert/manipulative). Wish I would have found you years ago. So very helpful!

[@Jesusandcoffee3382]

Same here. Covert narc 13 years of misery. Always wondering what I did wrong to make him unhappy.

[@learningismyjam9425]

Dyana that is interesting you say you have a CN older sister. I do too! My CN sis and CN husband even share the same birthday -- I guess that should have been a sign for me. LOL

[@shad5637]

Abuse yes im praying for a way out we have a son together for now all i can do is keep myself in my spare room and pray

[@jenniferdavis3483]

If I could “ like” this 100 times I would. Spot on. Great advice. I was married to a covert narcissist for 27 years and did not know what narcissism was at the time. I was biblically released from the marriage through his infidelity and as painful as it was, like you, my relationship with the Lord just got sweeter every year. I am now learning all about this topic and everything I’ve been through is starting to make sense to me now. I am so glad there are people like you talking about this so that others will understand what it is they’re up against and that they’re not really all the terrible things they’re being accused of. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart thank you!

[@barbaragraham-siegenthaler]

This sounds like my story. Thank you for sharing this!

[@malissahyatt2425]

No!!! His cheating did not "release" you!!! If you're married to that, you are free to go whenever you can!!!!! Just get out!!!!!!!

[@Cayuse2009]

After being married to a Narcissist "Christian" woman for 30 years, I can tell you, don't waste your time trying to make it work. Odds are It won't. Read 1 Kings and study about Jezebel (chpt 19) and if you study her characteristics you'll find that many of her traits are Narcissist. I think that what we call Narcissists today actually is a Jezebel spirit. Anyway, everything you said, I went through, including being physically assaulted many times by her along with put downs, verbal abuse etc. I even called the police a couple of times as I would have blood running down from her blows but they wouldn't even come out to question her. There isn't a Violence against Men's Act. I was raised to never strike a woman so I just "took it like a man". I didn't think I had justification for divorce because as far as I know she wasn't committing adultery. We went to many marriage counselors, but as soon as they would tell her that she was the problem, she would say they didn't know what they were talking about and look for another one until she finally gave up looking for one. Remember she'll never take responsibility for her actions as it is always someone else's fault. When I told her no when she wanted me to give her money to buy illegal drugs, (yea she was a drug addict and couldn't hold down a job) she called the cops and said I had assaulted her (I hadn't even touched her but that didn't even matter to the police.) The assault charge was dismissed later, but it came with an automatic restraining/no contact order that was the best thing that could have happened to me, because of course she kept trying to contact me to get back together and I would just say no contact order and hang up. I moved 1200 miles away and am free from her although it cost me about $400,000 in the divorce, it was worth it. She's the one who filed for divorce as she needed my money as she had spent what little she had on drugs. She has now renewed her "supply" and "flying monkeys" but is still trying to turn friends and family against me, but my true friends know the truth and the rest I don't concern myself with. My advice is don't ignore the red flags and get away while you can.

[@chosenone2851]

@ranger rider agreed 💯

[@karenkoenig5518]

Amen. May God help and give us all strength and wisdom to heal and make away to make the right choices to move forward. Hallelujah

[@jessicaoliveira1578]

How do I focus on God and not on my husband? I'm struggling with this. It's been a battle. But I'm so thankful for this teachings. It really has helped me and opened my eyes. I'm just waiting on God to show me what to do 🙏 Please pray for me.

[@Mamasan742]

We are in the same place. I've been married for 35 years. It's gotten to the point where God has given me this strength I've never had before. I fasted and prayed 2 days ago for clarity on what to do. The Lord is not telling me "yes, leave" or "no, don't leave." He's simply telling me to "wait because there are things I don't know yet." I'm going to continue growing in the Lord and I'm going to keep my spiritual ears and eyes open to wait for His next word to me. I pray that you see and hear the Lord’s leading in your situation. I'm so sorry for what you and many others are having to endure. Keep looking to Jesus. He will surely lead the way.

[@daisyy99]

Educate yourself, learn a skill. Sell everything you don't use. Have duplicates of all documents and info. Keep with exercise and grooming. Have clothes, shoes you can work in.

[@doryhill563]

I am asking the same

[@cherylvanesch3086]

I don’t know what will help you, but I know what helped me. I have my own stuff and baggage, God has shown me that being brought up by a narcissistic mother primed me for relationships with narcissists. I learned co-dependency, and to not see red flags, and to idolize (huge idol for me) a “good” marriage and family situation because of some severe trauma in my teen years (allowed by my mother) after my parents divorced. I decided in my mixed up traumatized teen mind that the solution was to find and replace my ‘happy’ childhood home with two parents and kiddos. Spoiler alert, all idols will NEVER work out, they will always cause pain and heartache. And mine did too. I married men who wanted to be idolized, and because I was raised with red flags being the norm in childhood, I did not see them in these men. Five marriages later - God is helping me to see, and work out all of that garbage. I am focusing on MY stuff, not my husbands. I have plenty to work on, and with God helping me though it, I now have a sweet, loving, relationship with my Jesus. That is what it has taken for me to focus on Jesus. Him helping me, taking me by the hand and leading me through sorting through all of my junk, and He’s loving and compassionate, and opens my blind eyes, and helps me heal, and repent, and see His truths, instead of believing in lies. Just work on your stuff with Jesus. We all have stuff He wants to work on with us. Humble yourself, and His grace will be overflowing and abundant. Your walk with Him will be amazing. Very painful at times, but I have a joy and peace within this that I have never had before. My being co-dependent and a people-pleaser was not pleasing to God. That is not godly. I’m learning differently now. God is helping me. That. Is . Amazing.

[@Jenoveryonder]

These videos have been so helpful. I’m still stuck, but knowing I am not crazy and that I can pray for God to reveal a way of escape is more hope than I had before.

[@jm5229]

Such a powerful video. God bless you for helping all of these women!! I’ve been through all of this and now I have a family member going through. I vow to help women with this issue for the Glory of God.

[@msdee2905]

Thanks for sharing. My first and second husband are narcissist. I divorced my first husband due to adultery. I am separated from my second husband but he is denying adultery but he is lying. Lord help this mess of a marriage. My physical emotional financial health has been affected.

[@zhannalicious]

100 % the most biblical and god centered response!! I have been struggling and have been focused on setting up my ducks in a row for divorce…. This Video has encouraged me to shift my focus back to Jesus and Gods will… the boundaries have been set and I’m working on that aspect but I know how to pray now…. Thank you… I want to be in right standing with God over anything

[@ozz64]

Thank you dear sister in the Lord ,I am married to a narcissist and everything you said is exactly what I'm going through ! The highs and lows , feeling like I'm losing my mind ,or it's all my fault . My husband is extremely o.c.d and everything is about money :( I can't seem to do anything right and he brings up my past all the time . I wrote down everything you said and I have started the process in praying for Him giving Him to God regardless of the outcome .yes I'm scared but I know God knows what's best for my life. Thank you so very much . God Bless Debra , Ohio

[@daisyy99]

God expects you to help yourself too. Work on preparing and saving. Plan.

[@sunpathgarden1034]

You are an answer to prayer! It is so hard to navigate mental illness while being a Christian. This is a relief to my soul.🙏🏻💕 thank you

[@kathymyers7279]

Yup.

[@joaniebrooks631]

Thank you , I’m truly fight being afraid of starting over and the wrath I will face if I leave him , I seek God out every day and I’m ready to accept God will change his heart or make a clear path for me to exit

[@doryhill563]

I am in the exact same place!!!!!!!

[@precilladsouza7112]

God doesn't want his children to be in abusive relationship because he has set us free. God always makes a way but you should move on boldly. Don't expect God to change the heart of a person who doesn't want to change as God has kept before us our choice. Dutronomy 30:19

[@peacefaith560]

sometimes divorce is the only way out, and God understands!! narcs will steal, kill, & destroy your peace, joy, finances, self esteem, health....divorce is sometimes the only option!!!

[@dennisd3505]

Thank you, Kris for this info and for the work that u do. I intend to share this with a friend who is married to narcissist. My husband (he's Dennis - I’m on his YT acct while commenting here) and I both recognize how cruel he is to her and actually stopped going on couples dates with them years ago due to the way he would speak to her when in front of us; so disrespectful and inappropriate. And of course what a narcissist would do in front of others would only be a fraction of what they feel they can act like when they have their “victim“ alone. He is quite cruel to her …verbally, emotionally. They’ve been married for over 40 years. I am urging her to seek counseling if for no other reason than to learn how to emotionally protect herself. I myself, learned about narcissists years ago through counseling, books, and online info because of my brother. I was about 40, and had been under his thumb in a sense for my whole life. I can truly say that the Lord freed me, and now, even though it’s rare that I speak with him, the pain and tension has been about 95% removed. Unfortunately my husband’s son is a narcissist and has hurt me emotionally many many times. He’s as selfish and uncaring as they come. Distance is my friend. But it grieves my heart so to imagine being married in that situation - to be financially connected to these cruel men - it’s a certain kind of evil. Lord come and free the prisoners from their bondage and heal them in Jesus' holy name.

[@eden7440]

You were with your friend and watched the abuse and you didn't say anything!!! You didn't say how angry it made you? By keeping quiet you became part of the problem and the abuse

[@glory3769]

Wow, your story sounds so much like mine...almost identical. Only I was married 11 years, divorced in 2021 and he tried to come back and take me out. BUT GOD! MADE A WAY OF ESCAPE. He was just found guilty on all charges and is awaiting sentencing. Thank you for sharing, I hope to one day share mine and help so many as you are. May the Lord be with you and bless you always.

[@NickiDrealtor]

This blessed me. It’s one of the hardest things to ever deal with, especially with children

[@Kingdom_lyfestylesCervantes]

I’m going throw it

[@geraldinechisolm2757]

This was me yesterday, having a battle in mind while knowing the truth. It is definitely good to know the lord. We have to shield ourselves with the whole armor of God.

[@roslyntucker590]

Praying and waiting for the Lord.

[@shannonleahbeauty]

I’ve been married to a narcissist for the last 18 years. We have three children. I separated myself from him just this last year, but we are still living together, which is super difficult. He always controlled the finances and has used that multiple times to “exploit” me. For years, I knew something was terribly “off” but I didn’t have the words to describe it. All I knew, was that I was constantly put down and devalued, while he battled a pornography addiction. I have no desire to move outside the will of God, but I also have no desire for this. I am learning to wait on the Lord and trust in His timing. I’m currently in therapy with a spirit-filled woman and it has been amazing! It’s nice to know that I’m validated and not “going crazy.” I’m so thankful I found your channel!

[@BeautifulLife-ge9rp]

Your story sounds so much like mine... Identical I can say! The only difference is that I am married to this narcissistic for about 13 years.. I am also waiting for God's timing and releasing! He has done so many miracles in my life for The past 2years and I believe He has a plan for my life! I encourage you to be strong in the Lord! He will not forget US, He will release!

[@BeautifulLife-ge9rp]

Your story sounds so much like mine... Identical I can say! The only difference is that I am married to this narcissistic for about 13 years.. I am also waiting for God's timing and releasing! He has done so many miracles in my life for The past 2years and I believe He has a plan for my life! I encourage you to be strong in the Lord! He will not forget US, He will release!

[@BeautifulLife-ge9rp]

Your story sounds so much like mine... Identical I can say! The only difference is that I am married to this narcissistic for about 13 years.. I am also waiting for God's timing and releasing! He has done so many miracles in my life for The past 2years and I believe He has a plan for my life! I encourage you to be strong in the Lord! He will not forget US, He will release!

[@BeautifulLife-ge9rp]

Your story sounds so much like mine... Identical I can say! The only difference is that I am married to this narcissistic for about 13 years.. I am also waiting for God's timing and releasing! He has done so many miracles in my life for The past 2years and I believe He has a plan for my life! I encourage you to be strong in the Lord! He will not forget US, He will release!

[@BeautifulLife-ge9rp]

Your story sounds so much like mine... Identical I can say! The only difference is that I am married to this narcissistic for about 13 years.. I am also waiting for God's timing and releasing! He has done so many miracles in my life for The past 2years and I believe He has a plan for my life! I encourage you to be strong in the Lord! He will not forget US, He will release!

[@anuksunamun0494]

Thanyou so much for this video. Im married to a narcissist for 17 years now. Im so broken that i dont know what to do. Im going to take your advice and take it to God. Becaues my main concern is that i dont want to step out of the Lord's will. That hit home when you said, God will either turn this relationship around or release you....

[@abba7707]

I believe God has already given you the sense of need for a change. I just commented but we need to stop saying pray when we need to act. Not always but in this case, yes. You are not at fault. Don't be afraid.

[@nokotose7127]

I truly believe when it comes to Narcissism, we are dealing with a demonic entity within the person. Why else would they act so cruel and so evil? I can tell you that I know 8 Narcissists at present, some malignant, some covert and some overt. None, at the present, I am conversing with. Having no contact is the only way to go for me so I can keep my peace. These people do nothing but disturb your peace. When you pray for discernment, God answers your prayers!!

[@donnawoodham868]

Me too . Even after calling on the Lord for his own salvation. He looks at porn , gets made over nothing , ... Just finding out about narcissist in the pass five years . ... Now knowing what's wrong with him .

[@nokotose7127]

@@donnawoodham868 I hear you. Praying for your situation.

[@victoriacreighton9126]

I do appreciate everything you are sharing to help your listeners, its such a blessing I'm just listening in amazement everything you say is always 💯 .I've listened to several of your messages they are always such a blessing to me. I thank God everything ,my relationship is definitely a covert marriage. I did not discover it until almost 1 year into my marriage. He is very religious and hypocritical. But through many narcissistic teaching I have learned to set my boundaries. I'm waiting on God as to what he wants me to do I definitely pray everyday, he is in another country now but I've had to deal with his drug addiction, that he continues to go back and forth with. Now he's on this religious wheel again Bible scriptures on his car going to go back to Bible School,still what's in my heart and what I've experienced with all the narcissism it's torn me up on the inside . I've been able to go on with my life. I'm trusting the Lord that in this negative Soul tie I will be able to get out. I wish I would have discovered who he was before I married him but I move too fast. I married within three 6 months . I fault myself, he was a Christian went to Bible college for a year. He Bible me. bombed, I didn't realize he was narcissistic I thought maybe he was bipolar because I never had heard of narcissistic before . I saw that term and listened to so many KZbin teachings..I was able to put my finger on the traits with so many examples that were happening after 9 months of marriage they began to come out. Even though these things were happening. I would say to myself oh I'm going to forgive him he asked me to, he would apologize. I would say yes that's r what Christians are supposed to do, but this kept going on for over a year. I started realizing this is just love bombing me. I never called him a narcissist but after all the teachings I've heard on it, they don't change .I still see these traits even when he scripture bombs me. I began to see the selfishness, violent rages, temper tantrums, rules don't apply, he was above the law, plays the victim, NO empathy, does all the talking, skips over my thoughts unless it benefits him, presents this wonderful personality to the public, treated me like I was a child over and over again, entitlement, take NO responsibility, every one else is to blame, his way or no way, argumentative, disrespectful, controlling, low self-esteem gaslighting, manipulative, takes bible scriptures out of context.The list can go on you know the traits. I'm trying to find how I can love him. The only way I've been able to is to see through God's eyes. I know I mess up and miss it. I'm not perfect, but I've never been treated like this before ever. Really what I learned it just boils down to it's a wolf in sheep's clothing, you know them by their fruits. God does not manifest his spirit like this, it's demonic it's the devil, it's easy for me now to recognize a narcissist.Their actions and thoughts are not in line with God's word. Its an unhealthy situation to be in. I'm sorry to go on and on. But maybe l am helping someone else. Thank you soooo.... much😇 God bless you will be in my prayers🙏 I will make sure others hear about your channel..

[@julieolaniyi2060]

I'm in the same situation. Thank God for this channel, it has been of great help to me.

[@martiwalsh2069]

They know enough to keep it behind closed doors and not let anyone else see or hear it. They know enough to buy gifts when they think it will "fix" things. They know enough to instruct the kids to lie to mommy because she won't like this. Sixteen years of marriage counseling and EVERY ONE of the professional counselors was "not a Christian" or "biased against men" or "swayed to your way of thinking." Even the ones he selected. Evil, pure evil. Run, Forrest, run!

[@Kelle0284]

Next time, pick a Christian counselor.

[@Kelle0284]

@@charityhutton6719 The husband is supposed to be the head of the wife. It's the husband's responsibility to be the peacemaker and the one to make the first move. For him or the counselor to say that you are at fault for the.way your husband acts toward you is unbiblical. That counselor certainly lacks discernment about the situation. If he/she clearly was led by the Spirit, he/she wouldn't have responded to you in that way. That counselor was either a wolf in sheep's clothing or a charlatan who was going through the motions.

[@martiwalsh2069]

@@Kelle0284 we did. He decided those Christian counsellors were "not true Christians." Multiple times.

[@Mamalov53]

You are good. Everything you said was confirmation to what I sensed God saying to me. God bless you. I actually prayed 9 years also. The exit time is coming. I suffered 35 years. I didn’t take the escape the first time because I did not know but I am clear now.

[@johnniegeorge9106]

Thank you for bringing my mind set back to the Most High in these trying times of being married to a narcisssist

[@doryhill563]

Financially absolutely stuck....but sure have the scales off my eyes and see clearly the covert ways ....praying for financial freedom

[@TressyDsouza-e6i]

Beautifully explained. Praise God, I found this

[@KeepinItReal632]

I’m only about 5 minutes in so I know it’s possible this is addressed later on, but we also have to be aware that narcissist use hoovering to suck you back into their narcissistic trap. They will say they will change, get help, seek counseling, etc. etc. just to get you back in the relationship, only for it to be worse than it was before. Just make sure there’s real change, consistent changed behavior, before going back to someone with these narcissistic traits.

[@GodsChosenMekAmoR]

Yessss, this really should be touched on because even the covert narcissist does this. When you leave them or set up any type of boundary you need to move in silence. They get psycho deranged when they feel you are about to leave. It was the grace of God that protected me and the kids when I got out. He did still do a lot of vindictive and evil stuff and in his delusional mind still was convinced it was my fault a whole 3 mistresses I found out later. God gives us intuition for a reason and we need to trust ourselves again as we are under God. They do not change and they hold that grudge of you leaving against you forever. We have been divorced 3 years and he still tries to get back at me and still smearing so yep I was glad I listened to God and did NO CONTACT. You have to find reality again after their evil and churches and counseling is a no no. The preachers will tell you to take them back in faith with no works or put you down as an unsubmissive wife because you say he needs to prove he has changed. I'm so glad I did it God's way because my Father built me up to find my voice and sound mind again whew. Now if someone in authority or a man says you need to do this I know they do not trump what the Holy Spirit is telling me. I don't care who it is God has given me a new discernment and I will not be spiritually abused or told a good wife takes her husband back and must be forgiving to an unrepentant narc. They will make you pay ten times worse. When God told me go because I feared God I never went back to him, He hoovered many times, professed love, and cried, to my later reading the malicious things he lied and said about me in custody court as he tried to take the children so I could pay him child support because I would not give him another chance. I moved on in peace and wanted to peacefully co-parent but they definitely hold grudges for things they did to you. These spirits are treacherous. We must stay alert and trust the intuition God has given. If fruit don't show changed don't be scared to say NO!

[@tanjarott7535]

Amen. I certainly knew something was wrong all along. I never really knew what a narcissist was. Until about 3 years ago when i realized what I was living with.

[@loriehobson5862]

Thank you so much for such wisdom on a narcissist I’ve separated from my husband but praying God will heal and restore us to a healthy relationship if that be Gods will

[@noosha898]

This video helped me so much, almost brought tears to my eyes. This revelation is huge for my relationship with my husband. Thank you so much and God bless! 🙏🏼

[@kimberlybantwell7498]

My narcissist husband was deceptive from the beginning he was able to keep up this disguise for 3 years ( yes there were red flags but I was ignorant to narcissism and that it could be a serious illness even though my first husband was worse than this one in his physical abuse) I am an ignorant and naiive person when it comes to the bad in people and I forget too easily the things they have done. Now I want to be set free.

[@allisonanderson9175]

This is probably the single best thing I've seen/heard/read regarding Christians married to narcissists/those with narcissistic tendencies.

[@Maria-se6ps]

Thank you for being vulnerable, open, genuine and honest about life!! This channel has helped me tremendously. Be blessed!

[@irafbf3488]

Thank you for this video, I needed this so much. I have finally discovered the label to what my husband is after 10 years. prayer is the answer, thank you for reminding me that God knows everything. God bless you abundantly.

[@davetorchia9985]

I enjoy listening to your podcasts,I was discarded by a which I know was a pathological covert narcissists.i couldn't believe that their are female narcissists.this devistated me till this day,you were so inspiring to me,thank you Kris.

[@Kris_Reece]

I'm so glad you've found the content helpful. Thanks for watching Dave. May God bless you on your healing journey.

[@mamalie10]

Yesterday I saw a wonderful video with a testimony how by continuing praying simply The Father's Prayer a autistic child was healed. And then I read in the commends I read a lot of same kind of testimonies. So let us start to pray the Father's Prayer

[@eden7440]

"God will either turn this relationship around or he'll release you". Hard advice when you've been praying for years for God to act. Yet you are right. As a Christian I have learned that God first is smoothing the rough spots off me. Through my narcissist husband I have come to so treasure the Lord Jesus. He has become to me everything my husband is not. And maybe this was necessary for me. It's not easy to wait for God to act, but I've learned that when I have taken my life into my own hands, I've really messed it up. That's how I got into this hell of a marriage in the first place. So I haven't given up and I'll "Be still and KNOW that He IS GOD".

[@Muchjoyhere1981]

I feel for you and could say the same thing. I could take anything from him myself and did starting the day after we were married. I was then his personal possession. But when he started abusing the children, I started reaching out for help. I did not think he wanted to be like this, and he wasn’t so much of the time, but if anyone crossed him or didn’t obey, it was a bad deal. And then he would accuse me of interfering with his discipline and that made it not effective, according to him, so he could not be a father. Then I didn’t take it to him per Matthew 18 and try to fix it… I took it to the church, which, I didn’t, but in his mind the church getting involved meant I took it to them. And how many years did I plead with him and quote scripture that his methods weren’t godly, and yet I never told him. 🤔 It drove me to Christ. I revelled in my quiet time and that’s how I survived. Now I am separated. I asked God to make it clear to me if and when I should leave. He did. And I have the full support of the church. But I don’t have the closeness with God anymore. I am so busy caring for my children, taking care of the property a church family is letting us use, making money to live on, and I’m feelingless. I miss it. The need for God. The drive to be close to God to have Him for my husband. I am away from the emotional, physical and verbal abuse, but I miss the nearness of God.

[@alishasr3248]

Wow! Amazing. This is surely encouraging! Thank you for this video! God has surely made you very strong! "You are overcome by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of your testimony!!! Glory be to God❤

[@annelyseclark3312]

I have been married 28 years to one. Just found out over a year ago what narcissistic personality is. I listen to countless videos. My mouth dropped earing all the testimonies exactly the same as I'm going through. I legally separated twice years ago when my kids young because of physical abuse. He never touched me again . But the emotional and verbal abuse is sometimes worse. No physical scars, but a fractured heart. I recently involve the church again . No one is really doing anything to help much. Actually my husband was able to use someone at men study to help him with his narcissist son. And they believe him and think I'm the liar. It's heartbreaking 💔

[@rebekahtamagne5086]

Your ministry has blessed me tremendously not only in helping me face the NPD in my husband but has more importantly strengthened my walk with Jesus! Thank you!

[@Kris_Reece]

I'm so blessed to hear that. Thank you for your support

[@skillsetcounseling]

Such great commentary Kris, especially as you highlight the more subtle forms of abuse in a marriage. This will be a great resource to share with my clients. God values us and did not create us to be doormats for abuse.

[@jeancraig7765]

You saved me ! Your words that God sees everything. He knows what im dealing with. Focus on my relationship with Him and God will lead. Freedom. Thank you

[@Jesusandcoffee3382]

Kris, I had a covert narcissistic husband. I left after 13 years of marriage. He was so mentally abusive. I had asked God to reveal things in my life that needed attention and this is what he revealed to me. I confronted my narc and he admitted everything. He said he had no empathy, sympathy or guilt about anything. He said he can’t even love. He said he likes who he is and won’t change. I realized that was the end of my marriage. How could I respect myself and stay? My mom is a grandiose Narc. My ex husband is a malignant narc. I’ve had all three in my life. He used to physically and mentally abuse while cheating the whole time. Lucky me, lol. But thank God I am free of the narc men in my life.

[@kristinB.]

I went no contact with my covert narcissist fiancé after this two year relationship I finally have a name to his awful behavior I’m so tired of the gaslighting and manipulation tactics he try’s to pull but it never works with me I battle him every time he’s never wrong and never takes accountability for anything it’s like a back and forth battle. I needed a break to step away grow closer to God and relax my mind from all this, I do love him and wish he was different this is a hard pill to swallow knowing and understanding a narcissist Im praying God heals his mind and take that narracsistic spirit off of him whether we are together or not, I pray for his salvation and my peace..

[@shad5637]

Thank you been dealing with this for 13 years so so tired of it bless you

[@shauneekayee8063]

you have no idea how much this helped me. my husband is a narcissist and it’s so hard.

[@learningismyjam9425]

You just spoke to my heart! You said the words I needed to hear. Amen! Tears!!!! You see, I’m in the exact shoes you were once in. Married to a CN, desperate for a way out, and it’s affecting my health. I started dating my husband in 2003, married in 2007 and I knew early on something was off but I was in love. The mask came off after our first was born in 2010. I was introduced to Covert Narcissism a couple of years ago and I finally had a name for what was going on - CN, with PA tendencies, and gaslighting. It’s been a real struggle bus. I found male enhancement pills in 2020 (even though we hadn’t had sex in years) but he explained them away as “wanting to rekindle us” and I had no other proof - I was actually happy, I thought God was releasing me and He was revealing that my husband had an affair but no other proof came forward. I have no idea what my husband does with his time and money. He’s financially abusive which is a whole other story. I’m oversharing, which is not usually like me, but I think it’s because I am just that desperate. Anyway, this gives me hope and strength to keep on praying, trusting God’s will and his timing.

[@liciacanada7527]

Awesome advise! 😮 I will focus on my relationship with God only! And pray and pray! I divorced a narcissistic traits person and married again a covert narcissist and am separated now….im going thru therapy and surrendering all my all to the Lord!

[@ytb8361]

Why is it that most people join malignant narcissists when they scapegoat people ? Why is that most people are bullies and care only about getting people to respect their own boundaries and not also the boundaries of people ?

[@Kris_Reece]

Good question that perhaps we will answer more in depth on an upcoming episode. in the meantime, remember how charming and convincing these people can be PLUS how ignorant and mindless others can be to their lies. this makes for a perfect recipe for deception. That's why as believers we need to cling to Isaiah 54:17. blessings!

[@jentbotbfa]

Great video. Most devastating relationships you will ever encounter…

[@gillianraq5485]

Blessings to you, this podcast was amazing, for I am embracing my relationship with God 🙏 due to my challenges with narcissists relationships, God really hears our prayers and answers.

[@rosiecunningham2490]

Thank you Kris,going on 38 yrs of marriage,and I'm going to be 76. PRAY FOR ME/ US!

[@Dr.JudeAEMasonMD]

Toxic (covertly narcissistic) mother ✔️ Malignant narcissist ex-husband ✔️ I guess I’m 2 for 2. 😉

[@keysnotalicia]

This was SO helpful for me. I hate that you had to go through the pain from the toxicity, I would not even wish it on an enemy! But I thank God because I was able to identify with your story and also that just distancing myself and staying close to God until He tells me what to do. I am a little over 5 years in.

[@anafortes6830]

Thanks once again Kris. I have been praying for a sign, an answer from God. I guess this is it. I am beyond my strength, lost weight, night sweating, nightmares. Dealing with passive aggression, stuck professionally. I caught his chatting with other women early in the relationship, same women I knew before we married and decided to stop looking at his phone. I shall wait for Gods time. My battle now is constant thoughts of giving up. I am praying to God to give me strength. Living one day at a time.

[@DivaDerin]

The Lord is your strength. You shall overcome.

[@Kelle0284]

I'm glad to hear that you lost weight. Congratulations!

[@hodaviahfoods3754]

Please flee , flee from him. Pray for him from a distance. You are not God. Leave him in God’s hands. Do not stay!

[@anafortes6830]

@@hodaviahfoods3754 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 thank you. Praying day and night not to do anything unworthy and keep hope that I can be happy again with my kids.

[@misjudgedbeauty]

Thank you so much for this.i just got married to a narcissist..❤❤ but God told me don't fear I'm with you and He is comforting me as my eyes are open.