How Ego Controls us and How to Control Ego

[@karltanner3953]

Dr. K might be the best thing that ever happened to the internet. I'm not even kidding.

[@LameBushido]

Seconded

[@AxeKick80]

Thirded

[@dragonplayz6606]

@Kevin Che i used to watch them and they just spout conservative ideology, Joe rogan is far more centrist but I would say healthy gamer is by far the superior option and dr k is extremely intelligent. Jordan Peterson is an intellectual fraud especially when it comes to politics, with religious people, if they believe in an illogical idea like god without burden of proof, who knows what else they would believe in that is illogical...

[@dragonplayz6606]

@Kevin Che who

[@charlesahweyevu]

@@dragonplayz6606 if u believe in god. youre an illogical person?

[@jvolc]

1:41 "You try to change, and then you notice that when you try to make a change, you start to become uncomfortable; that's the issue"

[@jvolc]

8:53 "CONFIDENCE & EGO are actually like on a SEESAW: the MORE CONFIDENT you are, the LESS your EGO is active; the more your ego is active, the less confident you are because the sense of confidence isn't a sense of self that's based on comparison; it's a sense of self that's based INTERNALLY."

[@matthewherbold9479]

reads like a poem

[@pirga19]

Dude, more people need to watch this guy, he's legitness.

[@Marksm50]

Čuti i Prićaj he’a gonna blow massively soon

[@pirga19]

@@sneedmasterflsh pričaj means talk, ćuti means shut up, so my name is like thut up and shalk

[@hanta7488]

He is blowing up currently. Look at where he was 1 month ago. like less than 5% of the views

[@xxsuper99xx]

man he's often much to vague and lacks a real presentation in these videos. If they would be redone, condensed based on his talks with clarifying powerpoint or so supporting the argumentations and examples, that would be greatness.

[@_Onlime]

@@xxsuper99xx but it's a livestream, he isn't focusing his efforts on making 10/10 youtube videos. Also remember that he can't go into details or he'll get banned for giving medical advice :D

[@krizdafix]

Dude just yesterday i learned that i have a very unhealthy way of always comparing myself to others and generally letting my ego get the best of me.

[@11myRSvidz11]

I do the same thing. I have waves of motivation and then episodes of overthinking about my future. Watching this helps so much.

[@AnimeMemes]

Unhealthy Gamer: How does one cure ego ? Dr.K: Reject Humanity, return to Monke

[@darthlynx5792]

We knew it all along

[@blakewoods7232]

Monke has ego, progress to crab, be without ego, scuttle scuttle scuttle into the future!!

[@Shadow77999]

Move into the woods and send people mailbombs

[@Lolshi11]

This man is singlehandedly changing lives. Much love

[@Max-sh6zu]

Last year I watched a ton of these videos and made so much personal progress. Some shit went down and I fell so far backwards, but I'm back to watching Dr. K's content again, and it's nice.

[@D_Jilla]

Glad you're doing better now friend. It's one thing to start and it's another to fall and rise from the ashes.

[@earlymorningladyfarts]

Same here.

[@Aryan111ize]

theres always something to learn from dr.k

[@chevestong]

0:35 - 0:45: "Our mind prefers the comfortable to the good. This is important to understand: your mind prefers that which you know to that which is good." 12:51 - 14:28 Just a personal timestamp. This part was super salient for me so I'm saving it for if I have to come back to it later 😌

[@ilsagita5257]

Thanks it was totally divine to me thank you

[@silverrain530]

I realize now that I have a huge ego, yet I can't pinpoint where it exactly comes from. Surprisingly, no-one has ever accused me of being egotistic but I have been called cold and arrogant before.

[@elijah7939]

Most People think ego is being braggadocio but its more of a cover up for insecurity

[@maxono1465]

ye from my experience too, being cold to others is like 100% ego when i was scared or smth

[@HelixMaster12]

The answer is probably “when was there a time where you felt like you needed to be egotistical.” Like, that and most things about people are a form of defense mechanism, the answer to where it comes from is what it’s defending.

[@svenofthejungle]

@@HelixMaster12 Underrated comment. What are we defending? That's the real question.

[@raidenfrizz]

You sir have just pulled the words I’ve always wanted to say out of my mouth

[@BoloBouncer]

"So if our teacher speaks of the renunciation of ego, we attempt to mimic renunciation of ego. We go through the motions, make the appropriate gestures, but we really do not want to sacrifice any part of our way of life." - Chögyam Trungpa Maybe the paradox is that our society thinks the way to acceptance is through feats and accomplishments, but really the only way to even enjoy those feats and accomplishments is to feel like a success, feel like enough, before you even get there.

[@NeXxzY]

Mark my words, if you keep at it you’re gonna be huge! This is so important, and gives so much value to so many people at a time where it’s the most important. So happy I found you man, these last two days I’ve found so many valuable insights. Just thank you man.

[@stoneyNET]

Spot on!

[@Kevindude8868]

Hes blown up a ton now

[@denialz1460]

oh how right you were

[@HanyuuHOLO]

669k subs at the moment. I watch their videos pretty much daily and I see how they're getting 1k to 2k new subscribers each day. It's great because it's really well deserved and it's content that everyone should, I won't say watch, but know that it exists and consider consuming it. The other day I watched a video from this guy from 2019 and he mentioned he had 45 viewers (the video is "What is ego - Dr K explains" or something like that, if you're curious) and I found it so great that the content from those times and the newer content are just as legit and well intended.

[@421sup]

based 1.26M subs now

[@atl663]

Healthygamer is the first big step in humans being effective at helping themselves and others in a massively accessible way

[@TheyBenefit]

I'd like to take a moment to thank KZbin for changing the recommendation algorithm and showing me Dr.K. I can finally work on myself now

[@PierreBezemer]

"Nature doesn't care, nature is gonna be nature" that's some golden sentence there, and also meme applicable

[@Justin--ze6qq]

A lot of these early videos are so insanely helpful man. Can't find info like this anywhere and the video only has 53k views. Incredible.

[@Snakesrcool2003account]

all of these videos just become more and more relatable omg im actually scared and frightened

[@eligoldman9200]

One thing I’ve learned is that if I want to be somthing else than what I am at this present moment then I have no choice but to deny myself what is comfortable. I’ve found a sense of freedom from worry about making no progress in life. As long as I deny myself bad food and deny myself freee time to go to the gym and deny myself alcohol I feel this sense of freedom from worry. This is what I’ve been missing out. And ironically I’m paying less attention to my progress as a result because I know where it will end if I keep going.

[@eonryan8491]

8:53 - confidence and ego 12:41 - aspiration above what hes capable of right now 12:57 - just do your best everyday

[@EvanWilliamG]

It seems a lot what Dr K is saying is to stop identifying with your conceptual schemes of how things are and instead identify with your ability on a consistent basis to transcend obstacles that present themselves when you decide to move toward something. This is the basic cure for nihilism that I think Nietzsche spoke about.

[@nord1756]

My Ego turned me into a terrible human being. I didnt Just Hurt myself but also people arround me.

[@chickenlover657]

Who asked?

[@flossdaily9]

Dr K has had such a positive impact on so many people it's incredible

[@albertozurdo7740]

My notes on the video, please comment and share yours, or your thoughts The mind prefers the comfortable over the good or unknown. To do the good, try and change, even a little and take notice of what happens. Do you get uncomfortable? Good. The first step to the path of change is being aware of what's going on. What stopped you from striving towards your goal? What helped cause that stop? For example if you try to eat good, but still go out to eat badly, figure out why? What was your mental state at the time it happened and what caused that mental state to happen and so on. The end goal is to not be on autopilot and separate the yous within. You are not necessarily your immediate thoughts, but they are important and need to be acknowledged in order for you to detach and move on. Like being afraid the water is cold in a pool. Acknowledge you are cold and jump in anyways. The ego relies on comparison and is sort of inversely related to confidence. The more confident you are the less your ego is active. The ego also relies on comparisons. With this in mind one immediate way to experience an inactive ego is to get out in nature. It's hard to have an ego in nature, as there is no one around for you to compare yourself too, and nature itself doesn't care about you. The root of ego is negative emotion. For example, if you have the mentality of being a smart kid, and a big ego to go along with it, ask yourself why. For me it was fear of failure and that if I actually tried I may not be as smart as I thought. Then the one thing I have "going" for me would not actually be true.... That said, don't get attached to your aspirations or "identity". Identity is not fixed and should not be part of your contentment. External sources, including identity may bring you happiness but it is only short lived. There is always more to strive for externally and one may never be happy. You might be unhappy with aspirations of a future identity or having an identity that is not what you want. A way to fix this is to acknowledge that what is "good enough" in your mind, or what you should do may never be real. And you need to focus on what you can do today, even though it may not live up to your expectations and its okay. After all, even the worst put work, is better than the best imagined work that never gets acted upon Remember that contentment comes from within. Learning to become attached to the results of your own actions and accepting yourself for who you are is ultimately how you become content. How do you learn do detach and become more aware? It is a practiced skill that should be developed slowly over time, and one way is through meditation. Dr. K recommends 20 minutes a day, 5 times a week for at least 8 weeks. Go from there. I wrote this more for myself and is not a direct relation of the video, but rather my own interpretation of it.

[@connieee5089]

thanks !

[@HappyGardenOfLife]

You shouldn't become attached to the results. You should be striving to be detached from the results. Focusing on results is focusing on external validation.

[@jvolc]

"I'm not good enough" is an ego. Identity is NOT permanent.

[@RobbieNewell]

Thank you bc this is what I deal with sometimes a lot of us have built alter egos consciously to combat the negativity the resistance to accepting our goals

[@jvolc]

5:59 "RECOGNIZE when you have thoughts of "I'M TOO GOOD for this" or "I'M BETTER THAN other people". Here is the CLUES of EGO: Ego pumps yourself UP and knocks other people DOWN, and ego makes COMPARISONS; so anytime you make a comparison between two people, that's EGO."

[@chickenlover657]

Who has such thoughts? Never had such thought in my life, what are you on about? Sounds like some hollywood line.

[@jvolc]

4:28 "You need UNDERSTANDING and AWARENESS of what is going on INSIDE YOU, because what I'm hearing is the end result. I'm not hearing the PROCESS; and if you want to make a CHANGE in your life, it's NOT about focusing on the end result; you have to make a change in the PROCESS. if you want a different outcome, you need to change your PROCESS."

[@thewrongaccount608]

This is a much needed topic. Gamers like me tend to be alone as I don't like to play online and that creates an isolation and only further enforces the me vs them mentality. Thank you so much!

[@robbytheyogi990]

Have an interview with Vegan Gains!! He's been dealing with suicidal depression for a large portion of his life, and is very open about his problems.

[@dancenow1337]

Would love a conversation with him, please reach out to Richard!

[@dancenow1337]

He's a gamer also.

[@mintee8638]

I want to make what I think is a useful distinction in ego: (1) a defensive/emotional ego, and (2) constitutional ego. I make this distinction because I thought that in a sense a big ego can be a good thing. I was trying to have this make sense in the face of defining ego as a defensive mechanism. I think a defensive ego is like a shield that one more actively uses, and a constitutional ego is like health, more passive. A defensive ego tries to find and block attacks on the person. A constitutional ego endures attacks. If one wants to endure attacks and not have them bother them as much, that I would imagine having a big constitutional ego means that more attacks are less effective. What this means in practice is to think highly of yourself in such a way that if an attack were true, you have a psychological frame/mindset/way of thinking that can handle being wrong there. You have a good philosophy for dealing with failure and being wrong. You find value in acknowledging the truth when it hurts you. It turns out that it actually doesn’t objectively hurt you to discover that you made a mistake. The hurt was in making the mistake, not in discovering it. In fact, discovery of the mistake helps by taking a step towards fixing the problem.

[@jvolc]

4:48 "WHERE did the decision to make bad food START? Did it start by skipping lunch? Did it start by skipping dinner? Did it start by working too much? Did it start by not packing your bag? Did it start by not waking up early enough? Where did that start? Did it start because you are in love with someone and they don't text you back? It can start in all kinds of places. You have to look at where the PROCESS STARTS and HOW IT PROGRESSES. That's how you make a CHANGE in the end,."

[@jvolc]

14:02 "Being good enough is not about anything you do out there; it's what you feel INSIDE."

[@CFmav]

Fantastic stuff. The last part about bring detached from the result, while still putting in 100%, has been my goal as of late. Thanks.

[@ilsagita5257]

Dr k you saved this life of mine I swear i wil strive for better shredding my hideen ego just for the sake of contentment

[@Libeer-rs3hu]

Thanks Dr. K. Thanks to your motivation I went running to forest to higher up my self esteem, fell on the muddy ground and ended up with bloody arm and leg FeelsBadMan

[@maxono1465]

did you do it again?

[@TurningTesting]

Did you do it again?

[@JohnSmith-ui9yu]

Personal notes: The mind prefers the comfortable rather than the good. If you want a change in your life you have to make a change in the process and stop focusing on the end result. Subtle kinds of ego: Recognize thoughts of Im too good for this or Im better than other people. Ego pumps yourself up, and knocks other people down. Ego makes comparisons. If you derive solice or sense of identity out of being better of other people, that's ego. Ego is triggered by negative emotions; shame, hurt or someone else is better than you, the more egotistical you become. Ego is a defense mechanism. Spend time in Nature to stop comparing yourself with others, it builds confidence. Confidence is a sense of self based internally. Being able to recognize an emotion is important but its purpose is not to the end where the emotion disappears, it's to be able to see it and be able to sit with it, and not listen to it, eventually learning to control it. It takes 20 mins, 3x - 5x a week for 8 weeks of meditation to see a clinical improvement. Devote yourself to the action, as opposed to the result.

[@Lurowene]

8:53 The confidence and ego seesaw analogy was like a fucking sniper just sploded my head

[@hybrid6481]

yep same

[@turrlerabbit4884]

I've been feeling absolutely awful lately. I can't do anything, and I've come to think that all the stuff I have to do is beneath me. I'm currently in college, and it's not exactly a 'good' college. I was accepted at a 'good' college, but we couldn't pay for it. So I just lost all motivation and drive to do anything. This video really helped me understand what I can do to set my head straight. Thank you.

[@magicmerls291]

When he says not good enough so often you instinctively start thinking about batteries and RAM

[@paintball10115]

It should be a requirement that all millennials and genz need to subscribe to this youtube channel. I have been living in a cage, you sir opened that door for me and i'll be forever grateful.

[@skyeleahy3767]

Dr. K's definition of Vairagya = "To do your best and leave the result up to a higher power" Japanese translation of "Nintendo" (任天堂) = "Leave luck to heaven" (actual translation) So Dr. K is saying that in order to relinquish the Ego, we must play Nintendo games? XD

[@MysticLoser]

Wii would like to play.

[@ilsagita5257]

You are beyond indian and japanese philosophers 😂

[@jvolc]

0:49 "People who get into abusive relationships often times get into another abusive relationship; they have strings of abusive relationships and it's because it's something that they're familiar with; it's comfortable."

[@srinp8726]

Seems like Dr. K have solved the riddle for me. Thank you.

[@MrMultiJer]

I feel like we need more of dr. k dan he can humanly provide

[@onethousandfaces]

We need to be our own Dr k

[@__ash13__]

@hollow bastion this is actually 5Head

[@RiderOfTheNight3]

damn so many uploads lately! keep it up, thanks for what youre doing

[@mawulidiliza]

Such helpful content. I really appreciate your presence on this platform

[@Adam-cn5ib]

Can you make videos about youtube addiction? I literally quit gaming because it just got boring, but youtube is so diverse and interesting I could stare at videos for hours, not to mention all the music I consume...

[@jvolc]

1:29 "He's working at a call center the same as giving up on his aspirations; that's the challenge he has to face."

[@hollo0o583]

Please make more content about the ego, a specially in regards to anxiety. This video out of context is all over the place and I feel like I can’t grasp/understanding anything you’re trying to explain. Today I watched your boot camp to anxiety which was quite enlightening and then tried to look for videos on minimising ego. I saw that really old stream of yours (from before you had the disclaimer before every video and back when your stream setup was yellow instead of black and green.)

[@sophianishimua]

I always fell like even tho I suck and hate myself, I am also better than everybody else, like ?????????? I mean, I don't truly hate myself, and consciously I am very aware that nobody is better than anyone. But I can't help itttt, hate this feeling. Who can relate??

[@dnzl1326]

I have the same feeling and its pretty normal but as long as you respect others and yourself you'll be fine

[@scrub3359]

maybe you are putting other people down to feel better about yourself? It's like "yeah I suck but at least I'm not like THOSE people." You might not actually believe that you are better than everyone else, but your mind just comes up with it to make yourself feel better.

[@bubbaliburtee8657]

The ego trying to get rid of the ego is like trying to look at your own eyes. I mean knock yourself out but don't at the end of all this say that no warner came to you.

[@jvolc]

0:33 "Our mind prefers the comfortable to the good."

[@larsky1346]

Listening to this a 0.5x makes Dr. K sounds like a really wise drunkard

[@TomayJ]

You weren't even kidding, he sounds exactly like a drunk man at that speed. Amazing.

[@domikatz]

wait this is so funny 😂

[@jvolc]

21:47 Detachment from success = the opposite of ego "Vairagya" is detachment from the outcomes of your actions.

[@cargon28]

I remembered the quote from Deus Ex Human Revolution "Change doesn't come without pain"

[@faceofdead]

Beautifully put. Well done Dottore!

[@mielleppens7586]

I recommend something like the gym or a sport you love, I started of pretty weak. And comparing wasn’t really what gave me motivation cause ofc I was weaker. So I was forced to compare to my self and celebrated every pr and now I’m extremely confident. And I think it’s really because of that, I also feel way more happy with how I look

[@jvolc]

9:24 Example - Spending time in nature when you're not near other people; hiking

[@Dancky2]

Dr K. "Yeah calm down guys, I'm not here to earn money" lmao

[@jvolc]

8:45 "When you spend time in NATURE, that's not going to build ego; that's gonna build CONFIDENCE."

[@jvolc]

14:30 "He needs AWARENESS of the processes that goon within his mind."

[@bills1967]

I really wished I started watching dr. k 2 years ago.

[@jvolc]

5:24 "How can you overcome the EGO that arises within?" First, RECOGNIZE what is EGO and what is not ego.

[@jonk3714]

I learn so much from this man, ik idk you Dr.K but i love you and all u do! Ur amazing :) Thank you

[@gelabuds9840]

A sure way to defeat ego is delete social media like facebook, IG, snapchat

[@scrub3359]

maybe for some people, but I'm sure there were plenty of egos before the 2000's

[@khreon27]

9:30 that's one of the reasons why excessive social media usage is bad. people go, do or buy something just to show off to other people. and i think people who do that is unhappy with themselves

[@Yojimbo711]

Your smile is the most precious treasure of Twitch ma dude!

[@100kejimaeda]

Yojimbo711 gay

[@ReactLMaD]

@@100kejimaeda you just have to be a twat dont you?

[@BandaidYT]

Le Baheeg 😂😂

[@Yojimbo711]

@@100kejimaeda Get your ass on Alok's stream, you apparently need it.

[@Adrian-qk9jh]

Recently decided my therapist wasn't a fit for me, glad my pal sent me a Dr k vid cuz he speaks to me lolol

[@CluelessEngineer]

Hey dr.k. Can you to release a book list. I'd love to read the books that you read.

[@gabegabriel9288]

He recommended Krishnamurti's books.

[@KeeperOfLogic]

In my opinion this is the most important channel on KZbin. Also if you want to see pure ego please check TechLead, I think it would be amazing if you finally succeed giving us an answer if is he is faking it or is he really made from pure ego.

[@samuelclaro8858]

broo i just checked the channel and literally its all about how rich he is HAHA, yeah its prolly pure ego xd

[@kristapsvanags3434]

But how do i deal with my ego when i'm with other humans? For example, when dancing?? How can i get confident, when i think i suck?

[@gamu1647]

this is pretty epic

[@monocyte2210]

13:40 i got a 10,000 usd grant while my other colleagues got 100,000 usd grant. I get insecure a lot because of this. Still working with my anxi3ty and ego

[@headoverbars8750]

Wow, really glad that I stumbled on this...subbed.

[@shanecar84]

Solid info. Thank you.

[@gamu1647]

just what I needed I watched the other ego video for a couple times today

[@justins7796]

Dude you deserve 1M subs, so much quality content here.

[@RamKumar-yi6wn]

Dude,you're as real as they come !

[@nirbhaygor]

Vairagya is detachment. It is letting go of everything. A person who is vairagi wouldn't care about a single thing. Shiva is the god of vairagya apparently also the god of destruction.

[@pecekistvaan]

Where can I learn more about Vairagya?

[@imhussen_5769]

what about pride isn't ego and confidence combined?

[@QoraxAudio]

9:30 climb on top of that boulder and make a selfie to show off on insta.

[@imagineimagining912]

I read the title as eggos and threw my waffles away. 🤦‍♂️

[@NerveFlux]

Confidence is important and so is humility. I try to use humor as a middle point. I read somewhere if you have never been humbled by a great challenge than you are yet to travel far enough beyond your comfort zone to know your true limits. So then after you have been down that road long enough and your beaten and exhausted how do you recover? Some say good food and humor.

[@auflangsam]

thank you

[@AlexMiddleton111]

Do you still go bouldering Dr.K? I would love to go climbing with you

[@mridul407]

The title is misleading but content is great tier

[@jmt1093]

If only i have watched ur videos earlier in my life. 😢

[@karltanner3953]

Hey buddy. You found them now. It's never too late to make a change. I believe in you.

[@dancenow1337]

The second best time is 'now'!

[@Bibituu]

Can you make a video about porn addiction ? it seems to be a bigger problem then people think , and it seems to go hand in hand with gamers

[@z0uLess]

I think I have gotten in just as much trouble by not having an ego. People get provoked by me not responding irritably or by me generally not looking engaged. When you dont get angry people also tend to treat you worse because they feel they can abuse you with no consequence.

[@jonieryk293]

Dr. K was talking about this in his "How to stop being a doormat" video and he explains it really well. I'm not sure if it's ego though. From what understood it's the self confidence that allows you to express yourself in a way that you want to, then letting others decide whether they will like your answer or not.

[@danicasts]

I feel you so much

[@LeonardoGPN]

I am 28 yo from Brazil and I'm still doing grad on Electrical Engineering. I grew up really poor, and in my development I created a lack of discipline that affect my results. I can see I learn things really easy, comparing with really smart people, at least the top from my country. I already tried to kill myself on ambien. Now I take Vyvanse and my grades are good but I'm not happy or fulfilled. The only time I feel really happy is when I do things I know my teachers and colleagues can't do. I became a slave of my ego, and everything else in my life looks meaningless. How can I overcome this? I already gave up accomplishing anything, I promised myself I would just go with the flow, because I don't really feel like is worth the effort yet, maybe overtime with my treatment, but anything else but my ego can make me happy.

[@Hartungalexmusic]

Tame Impala - Apocolypse Dreams

[@philnorberts4324]

Such a legend

[@hastethethird5956]

How does this translate to sports? Or is it a completely different thing with different behaviors, etc?

[@dronestrike7090]

Abuse is all I've ever known of love

[@davidalf1815]

you dont control the ego, you realize ego and self identity is only an illusion created from your own consciousness

[@TactlessGuy]

Yes, that's how you control it.

[@davidalf1815]

@@TactlessGuy controlling implies you put effort to conduct a certain thing. What I'm saying is letting go of any and all effort all together and letting things flow. Nothing can be "done" to control ego because the ego doesnt exist only in your mind it does.

[@Em-gj2sg]

You become friends with your ego

[@vivvy_0]

but what with my precious twenty labels :'

[@stepitup23]

Ok find the root and understand its cause etc.. and just by understanding my Ego problem will be fixed?!?

[@JohnthePixelizedGuy]

Maybe not inherently understanding it but that’s certainly the necessary first step. In my experience of getting over my ego it’s literally just been noticing it that has allowed me to separate myself from it overtime. Meditation has been a vital part of that

[@jvolc]

8:17 "Another cure for ego is spend time in NATURE."

[@Shrekboy567]

Does anyone know if it has to be 20 minutes straight for clinical benefit or would like twice a day for 10 minutes, something like that also work?

[@monocyte2210]

Better if its 20 min straight man rather than break it up. But if you are starting out 10min would be fine. Judt work it up to 20 min.

[@drewpocernich2540]

Ayyy Dr. K, do you think Super Smash Brothers can be a game that improves mental health (especially at a competitive level of gameplay).

[@jvolc]

10:58 Dr. K's story