How 'Friends' Invented The Friendzone - People Watching #5

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Sitcoms from the early '90s have pretty much ruined everything about platonic friendships.
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Friends

[@SebastianSeanCrow]

"Oh no we're just in a relationship" I love that lol

[@andrebrynkus2055]

And they met at the speed dating. (And Ted & Martha went to the beach.) Dreaded continuity.

[@restingsadface]

669 like

[@RottenDoctorGonzo]

No.

[@HourDreamer]

Oh well can't win em all

[@robertglass3944]

What a nice way to say, "No, we're just fucking".

[@thorevans6404]

Why does Ross, the largest friend, not simply eat the other five?

[@happygreenclean]

Thor Evans Collect the lower horn!!!

[@lalakuma9]

I'm just some guy... RULER OF OMICRON PERSEI 8!

[@genevievecharlotte3005]

This is for tumblr

[@RubeGold356]

Thor Evans yeth

[@satansenpai3971]

They are saving that for sweeps

[@comradeavocatto1839]

I love how this is a continuation of the confessional booth. Ted confessed about how he is one of those who secretly admires his friend and he felt that Martha feels the same. In another video, he was ranting about his problems and is feeling depressed. In the confessional booth, Martha complains on how a certain friend always talks of his depression and she's just tired of hearing the same thing. Each video tackles different themes but the characters are well developed. They have continuity and consistency.

[@AsdfAsdf-mi6ks]

This show is so well written and so good to go back on once in a while. I wish that more people saw it. Especially these "woke" kids of today.

[@Leftistattheparty]

@@AsdfAsdf-mi6ks the show is woke... This episode is literally a feminist essay about friendship and relationship.

[@wolfboy20]

@@Leftistattheparty Wait.. How So???

[@raydgreenwald7788]

@@wolfboy20 the whole episode is about how because of societial expectations on men and women not being able to be friends, these two characters are constantly heckled about their own friendship. The episode is a commentary about how society ingrains this idea of men and women not being able to form platonic relationships and how that affects Ted and Martha's friendship

[@bbworks159]

@@Leftistattheparty is that a bad thing?

[@AdrianSanchez-sr2tk]

are they just... sitting in silence until years later when they have to continue the same conversation?

[@AdrianSanchez-sr2tk]

is my life a lie?

[@RvEijndhoven]

I dunno, I have those kinds of recursive conversations with my best friend(s). You know, where every once in a while you repeat, almost verbatim, a discussion you've had before, except after you get to the part where it ended last time you add to it and over time it grows and the first part get dropped. Or is that just me? (If People Watching has taught me anything, it's that: No, whatever it is, it's not just me.)

[@napppstar0]

Not just you

[@paddogpaddog9128]

MR MEESEKS HAHAAH LOOK AT ME IM MR MEESEEKSKSKSRJVJDK

[@lordmew5]

Robbert van Eijndhoven as you can tell its not only you

[@melindawolfUS]

I don't think the actual problem lies in friendships, but in how people view romantic relationships as being something so alien to friendship. Big cinematic romantic gestures, gifts and sex are the things people focus so much effort on that they ignore the solid foundation that should be beneath it (friendship).

[@aceman0000099]

You're forgetting exclusivity. I would totally enjoy a friendship with a woman without sex, gifts, or big gestures, so long as I was treated better or thought of more than any of her friends or boyfriends. A relationship is about someone who makes you feel special. A friendship struggles to do that if there are 10 other friends with that person that get treated the same level.

[@aceman0000099]

A man in a relationship however, can much more easily sustain a friendship with women, because his base desires are fulfilled

[@melindawolfUS]

@@aceman0000099 That's just your ego talking. You shouldn't have to feel like the most important person to your friend. If your ego is that fragile, it'll be threatened when your wife has your child or meets a new female friend she's excited about. It's not healthy to expect someone to make you the center of their universe. You can't actually get your self-esteem that way and to try will be a disappointing endeavor as well as having that expectation quickly leads to abuse. You need help, seriously. This is my professional opinion as a therapist.

[@aceman0000099]

@@melindawolfUS nah, I'm talking about a friendship with a woman that I find attractive, while I am also single. In that case, if I found her attractive, and we liked eachother enough to be friends, I would be wondering why exactly she didn't find me attractive enough to date. But in many cases, there is an obvious answer, such as, they're in a relationship, or they live too far away, in which case I'm not bothered. so personally, I'm a young man and I have a few female friends, but they are all either in a relationship, live far away, or I don't find them attractive. All of the other girls, I have either pursued, or left alone. But my first relationship ended amicably, and we remained best friends for months after, however I was left thinking the whole time whether or not she wanted to come back to the relationship (I was very naive and deluded) so it kept getting worse and worse for me until it ended in catastrophe. And so I have learned that trying to be friends with women you find attractive is a masochistic way of life, at least if you're not in a healthy relationship with your own woman already. It's not that I want or need to feel like the most important person to my friend, it's just that, specifically as a heterosexual man, I feel like a relationship with a woman (a healthy one) is better in every way than a friendship, so there's no reason not to pursue one with someone you are close enough to be good friends with, if both are single and attractive. But if that fails to happen, the resulting friendship becomes one sided.

[@melindawolfUS]

@@aceman0000099 you seem to have major blind spots. You don't consider not taking it personally if your female friend isn't also attracted to you. She has to have some excuse outside of her own preferences to be acceptable to you??? It's not all about you. What you said seems pretty narcissistic. It's only your expectation not being met that tortures you, not the friend. If your guy friend were gay and he gets a crush on you, do you owe him a relationship if you're single? No. Duh. So you think of women as less than fully human. I recommend you quit watching *prawn* and go to talk therapy to help you with that.

[@jmlkhan5153]

I had a casual hook-up. Later, she became a regular booty call. Eventually, she became a good friend, that I sometimes bang. Now, she's my best friend. I have little doubt that as time goes on, we are gradually and unspokenly going to just naturally become life-partners. There will never be a conversation about it. Relationships are weird. They take a lot of different forms.

[@michaelkoech3365]

jamie kendall Still going on good?

[@LACwriter]

That actually sounds pretty cool, man. I'm happy for your... Relationship?

[@dire9619]

I would recommend actually becoming partners. Because you guys already went threw a hook up.. Thing? You'll still be friends if you ended up ending the relationship, so there's no point of not.

[@ΜαργαρίταΔαρζ]

al peteria I don't think that's a good idea. since everything else came unspoken to them, they shouldn't actively try to become partners because it will ruin the flow of their relationship. if it's meant to be, it'll come by itself. no need to push it. Plus, not many people keep in touch after break ups, even if they were good friends. it's just not worth the risk, man.

[@xanderotp]

jamie kendall you're a lucky, my ex made a pledge to save herself till marriage. Even I play the waiting game with my friends who are the opposite sex as I keep it very cool.

[@Domfass21]

I still remember him for wanting only 2 things, Surfing, and Pegging...

[@taloutezero]

+Dom Fass Based on this video I think he should have wanted "cool friends" instead.

[@aidenbelanger7867]

Huh yeah I recall that to

[@seignee]

Hannah Elzenaar girl wears strap-on then fucks the guy in the ass

[@Niphredyl]

The beach and pegging

[@timmytoms__]

HAHAHAHAH

[@AlfredEiji]

Wow, after looking at the comments section, it seems to me that many people are missing the actual message of the video. The video presents the *irony* of Martha and Ted professing that they don't want to have a romantic relationship while describing their relationship using characteristics that are central to strong romantic relationships. For instance, Martha says that they're "just in a situation of permanent mutual support and understanding." They seem to ascribe that characteristic solely onto friendships, and seem to think that intimacy of that sort becomes impossible in romantic relationships. Hence, they discuss in the latter part of the film how they don't receive the same level of companionship from other people they "go out" with and have sex with. However, what is a true romantic relationship but one of permanent mutual support and understanding? Aren't companionship, trust, and support what we should be seeking in our romantic relationships? Honestly, I think that the video presented an unfortunate reality on the general discourse about relationships: friendships and romantic relationships are mutually exclusive. As a society (maybe generation?), we've come to believe that we cannot be friends with whom we have sex and vice versa. We've come to believe that we can't receive the love we get from friendship if we receive the more physical love characteristic or romantic relationships. Solely within the context of Martha and Ted, I thought that the video was really expressing how these two people are so afraid of losing each other's companionship that they don't want to ruin their friendship by making it into a romantic relationship. There's a reason why the final scene of the video was of Martha and Ted engaging in a moment of emotional intimacy on a bench with the inscription M + T while professing that they could never be in a romantic relationship together. Their relationship is primed for a powerful and stable romantic relationship, but they refrain from moving their friendship to a romantic stage from fear of losing the existing trust and support. It is _ironic_, and in my opinion, bittersweet.

[@AnonYmous-mc5zx]

From the sounds of it, they have a grown up epiphany to make based on not just being sarcastic about society's erroneous dichotomy of friendships and relationships while begrudgedly falling into line with it themselves. Every single thing that I observe of society that doesnt make sense, I not only call out but change my behavior to not just be a part of the problem.

[@GraceLum]

That honestly makes so much sense cause I I thought the same way with one of my guy friends in the past- although things worked out now! And we found people who we connect with on a companionship and romantic level

[@Hakajin]

I agree with what you're saying, but I'm not sure that's what the video is going for. I mean, you can have that kind of friendship and just not be attracted to the other person. From my point of view... I think your romantic partner should be your best friend, though. Even if it doesn't start out that way, if you get married and have a family together, that's typically going to be the center of your life, the person you share that with is going to be your partner. I'm attracted by feelings of closeness and... this sense that me and that person are the same inside, somehow, like we're connected in a way that we aren't with other people. A feeling like soul mates, whether you believe in that kind of thing literally or not. I that know people who have a best friend of the opposite sex sometimes have trouble finding romantic partners who are ok with that, and I can't really blame them for feeling bummed about that... But on the other hand, I can't blame people for not being ok with it. If I tried to be in a relationship like that, I'd be setting myself (and him) up for heartbreak.

[@AceLM92]

That is probably the most sane comment I will see for this video

[@ItsOvaNinethousnd]

I like how, people watching videos are the only ones on youtube where Ican go down to the comment section, see a comment that is like,200 times bigger than the usual one and ACTUALLY read it! Actually its one of the best things about these videos, I'm actively looking forward to seeing what other people have to say. Usually the comments in other videos are not just "not all that intresting", but also just painfull to look at. Even if there are bigger comments that go into more depth, just because theire on the Internet a lot of people think that, proper writing and structure is "not needed". Fact of the matter is, that EVERYBODY hates reading and good structure is needed to make it not so exhausting and actually enjoyable.

[@para_momal]

I was a female "best man" and I couldn't have been happier to fulfill the role. The question was always asked "Why haven't you two got together?" and I've always given the same answer "We know & respect each to much to ruin it with sex and complications." Now, if I can only find the worst bridesmaid's dress for basically the real life Dumbledore...

[@aknopf8173]

How did it go? I hope he liked your knitting patterns :)

[@matthewwalker3131]

I deeply enjoy that you're considering a male maid of honour compared to "dumbledore"

[@ireysword]

the part about "just friends" really hit me because i've been saying this shit for years. if i even mention just meeting a guy no matter who it is, a collegue, a friend etc. my mom will instantly think that there is something romantic going on or that i want it to be romantic. personally i value friendships a lot higher that romantic relationships. when i hear how people talk about their spouses and what they expect of them all i could think is that they would never talk like this about their friends. shit they would probably punch the person who talks like this about their friends. I'd rather never have a permanent romantic partner than never have a long lasting friendship. we expect so different things from friendships and relationships yet one is supposed to be more important than the other? they both involve loving someone but it's so different kinds of love that it pisses me off to no end when people say they are "just" friends. Be friends. celebrate that friendship. treasure it. cause chances are it will outlive almost all of your relationships

[@owenbevt3]

A long term partner should hopeful become your best friend. However that kind of sucks because losing your partner and bestfrined in one go is something no-one should go through.

[@joshviator7365]

Iris Hildebrandt Are you really complaining about your mother being enthralled with your love life? Literally everyone's mom does that, male or female.

[@ireysword]

Josh Viator than that's a fundemental problem. because it's not just my mom. it's coworkers, it's friends and none of them react like that when I'm out with a female. which just shows that they forget or ignore the fact that a person isn't necessarily heterosexual. plus my mom knows i hate this kinda questioning. also shouldn't other things in my life interest her more? i mean yes she is like that because (i assume) she wants me to be happy but being in a relationship doesn't equal happiness and treating romantic relationships like this is putting immense preassure on a potential partner. you can't expect to find someone who will make you perfectly happy and yet that's what people seem to look for. plus i love my mom but I'd never would want to treat my partner like she does. so valuing her opinion when it comes to romance is a no go anyway. hell she thinks i have too high expectations when it comes to a partner when all i want is someone who treats others with respect and is ready to listen to other opinions than their own. also decent personal hygiene. that's also important.

[@owenbevt3]

'you can't expect to find someone who will make you perfectly happy and yet that's what people seem to look for' total agree. The BS 'love songs' (actual about unhealthy dependency) pumped out constantly by most radios have a lot of the blame. I am subjected to them constantly at work and can see now how they totally screwed with my hopes and expectations when I was younger.

[@joshviator7365]

Iris Hildebrandt​ Well that rambling had almost nothing to do with what I said, but there's no "fundamental problem" with a mother caring about your love life. Like you said, she just wants you to be, and if you're in love, you're definitely going to be happy. I'm gay, but so what if people assume I'm straight? You can't tell if someone's gay just from looking at them. In addition to that, we're also a minority, so it makes sense that people assume someone's straight. It's not like it actually hurts you or me. It sounds more like you dislike your mom's interest in your relationships than anything else.

[@MuddyRacco0n]

Staying "just" friends and not starting a relationship with my best female friend was the wisest shit I have ever done.

[@mq8858]

Maybe... maybe not...

[@dani010203stor]

thats a person who will be there for you, for always:)

[@kurtpunchesthings2411]

I mean I'm no expert I remember my mother once telling me that men and women can't be platonic friends without one or both being attracted to the other person unless ig there both gay or something not sure how true this is but like as a guy if I was hanging out with a female friend assuming I had any well no shit I'd fall for her eventually cause like being near a person for an extended period of time and such

[@strawberrymilk607]

@@kurtpunchesthings2411 Not really though, I'm straight and I don't feel attracted to my male friends and vice versa. Tbh it's annoying when parents say that you can't have a friendship with someone if they're a different gender-- like just bc someone is straight doesn't mean they'll have a crush on every single man/woman they get along with :/

[@epicaunleashed8764]

@@strawberrymilk607 vice versa isn't true

[@janamullinix2037]

I really like ted and martha's relationship, it is so refreshing to see the whole nonsexual male female friend dynamic.

[@ciklopas598]

Back in the 90s I was in the very famous tv show...

[@ericortega7342]

Fn,liar.

[@OmDhiraj]

What is this? a cross-over episode?

[@tom_something]

I've heard of "hey gimme that cartoon reference in the KZbin comments", but THIS is RIDICULOUS!

[@caasy9473]

I fucking love Bojack

[@user-wt9ps3mx8t]

Yeah

[@TravHarrisonTnT]

This series reminds me of Daria for some reason. And that's a good thing tbh.

[@btdtpro]

Like Daria, but even more up it's own ass and self-aggrandizing. There were times in Daria when she was shown by others that she'd judged other too quickly, or she was actually the one at fault. This feels like the author's power fantasy of always having an endless stream of "well worded" arguments to display their point of view when talking in public, while being surrounded mostly with people not smart enough to have had the thoughts themselves, but smart enough to quickly realize how smart the author/protagonist is. Though I could be judging too quickly.

[@NahedElrayes]

btdtpro Uh...watch episode 3

[@steveyrock1]

Travis Lafferty I see it now that you mention it

[@themmefatale]

Travis Lafferty same

[@Nexiusify]

I feel Daria is more complexly written and not made with the intent to push forward an agenda. I keep seeing the 'This is like Daria' argument but honestly I feel matters are dealt with from many perspectives before the protagonist settles on one, however she even isn't always right. It's up to perspective. This show presents one perspective, yes it discusses the matter at depth but it's not examined from all sides of the argument before settling on a choice. Choice is the key idea in Daria.

[@katecleary8290]

This makes me feel a lot less guilty about never being able to see the person I love in a romantic way despite being told so often that if you love someone you have to be in a romantic relationship with them.

[@wclark3196]

And I'm sure he loves giving you rides to the airport at 5 AM and helping you move, then going home to sleep alone. Stop playing dog in a manger. Set him free.

[@puckelberry]

This series is consistently great. I love how it echos all the stuff that I think, I dated my best friend briefly because everyone kept saying I should and because of that I kinda lost my best friend. Loving your friends and loving your partner can be the same but its also ok for it to be different

[@seanmiller9136]

I think it's cool to date your best friend. I did it twice and we both realized that we we were more importantly friends. We still are and we helped each other find out out what we wanted in romantic relationships. I was going to say life partners, but then I realized that we are still life partners.

[@bobbysealejunior6590]

puckelberry I dated a close friend of almost 30 yrs a few yrs back....we barely talk now, and when we do, it's strained and awkward...we spend more time talking about what didn't work and how she's dealing with the fact it didn't, than just being friends like we used to...

[@annietrinity1833]

"I love how it echoes all the stuff I think" How do you know it's not the other way around? I mean think about it; who has the upper hand in the direction of how ideas flow? You, one commenter, or Cracked, the source of entertainment? What if your thoughts and feelings are just so well integrated with the internet's zeitgeist, that what you perceive as an original thought is, in fact, just the immediately next logical step of a culture-wide train of thought? You find yourself reflected in the rest of the world because you are just a reflection of your world. After all, this show is art, and the point of art is to create a lasting manipulation of the audience's thought patterns.

[@MaedayMisfit]

puckelberry same. I tried telling myself I liked him back because of everyone saying I should, and we dated a few months, and it was fun, but ultimately didn't work out because I loved him as a friend, not a boyfriend. luckily our friendship remained on tact but I regret doing it nonetheless

[@DeviantDespot]

Would not have worked out if you didn't date, she would've felt rejected because you never tried it with her. The point is she was looking at you as a partner, if she wanted a friend she would've stayed friends.

[@filippap330]

I would have been so pissed if they kissed at the end

[@jmaan3]

I honestly thought thats where they were going with it, throwin us a curveball. But no just the usual messages.

[@FelicitasSews]

It would have been "the usual message" if they did kissed at the end. It also would have negated the entire point of the video.

[@METALZero2]

for young people, especially of the female sex, the usual is what happened (no kissing). What you are referring to is what older generations (>35) consider usual.

[@kajun316]

at the end , 6:34 , you can see the M + T in a heart at the back of the bench though. Her name is martha (M) and his Ted (T)... sooooo jussayin

[@Chazbc]

A heart can still mean platonic love.

[@YouB3anz]

Nice to revisit this series after so long. Definitely a gem of it's time. Get a very Bojack-y feel while watching it.

[@aceman0000099]

Because of the ugly line-art style cartoon and cynical worldview!

[@nt300uk]

This whole thing about the "friend zone" always bugs me. The way the term was used in Friends meant having romantic designs on someone who just considered you a friend. Alice is romantically interested in Bob, but Bob just thinks of Alice as a friend. Nothing wrong with being friends, but clearly a monogamous romantic relationship is something that a lot of people are searching for, and when that feeling isn't reciprocated, it sucks, even if you have a great friendship. That's all it meant. In as much as it was derogatory, it was in that it was a pitying description of Alice. It certainly wasn't ever intended to criticise Bob. When Joey tells Ross "you waited too long, and now you're in the friend zone", we aren't meant to hate Rachel for putting him there, we're laughing at Ross for having a crush on someone who doesn't like him back. Outside of a very narrow field within internet culture, that's how people use it. Virtually nobody uses it to mean Bob manipulating Alice into doing stuff for him while keeping his romantic affection just out of reach - it's just a term used to describe the very real situation of not having romantic interests reciprocated by a platonic friend. And even if the phrase has changed its meaning, that's not a reflection of the way Friends meant it.

[@sethobannion3149]

Yeah, the problem is that there were a lot of angry Alices on the internet griping about their Bobs, and thus the reactive SJW types equated friendzone with sex entitlement, even going so far as to claim that the friendzone doesn't even exist.

[@diegorivera9090]

That's why they mentioned Oppenheimer...as in they started something that they couldn't control.

[@samue1991]

So true. People use to smear guys and girls. If a girl "friendzones" a guy, people say she's an evil b*tch who is just manipulative. If a guy feels friendzoned, he's a soulless douche bag who only wants her for sex. Honestly you can be in the friend zone with the only intention of being romantically involved because you have feelings for them, not because you just want non committed sex

[@MamaMOB]

Sam Carmack the term "friendzone" is only used when a simple friendship isn't enough for one person, usually the man but not always. No one ever said they want commitment free sex. What's been said is that they are ONLY friends with someone to turn the relationship into more. If a person is ok with being friends with a person they have romantic feelings for they just call it being their friend.

[@ramdattaropemaker9009]

>It certainly wasn't ever intended to criticise Bob. Except thats what it ended up being. Other Alices, who *did* have this weird entitlement to sex with Bob starting co-opting the lexicon. And here we are.

[@ohsnavs]

Martha?! Why did you say that name!?

[@that_vivian]

Navs Montoya Best!!

[@doomzday0011]

Why doesn't Ross the largest of friends just eat all the other friends

[@alpacaobsessed9862]

doomzday0011 out here asking the real questions

[@ashleighlakomy9314]

Hahah, best quote from Lrrr

[@slaymarie_rdh_2B]

doomzday0011 is this from futurama

[@ashleighlakomy9314]

Yup, quote from Lrrr from Planet Omicron Persei 8

[@6000countingdown]

I'm consistently impressed with how simultaneously comedic, poignant, and intelligent these videos are. Cracked has really stumbled on a gem with Subnormality's videos.

[@elizabeth184]

People think that being a couple is separate to being friends. The fundamental core of a long term relationship is being friends with that person. Even if you fell in love at first sight, even if you feel lust for them, ...the most important thing is friendship. Being in a relationship isn't any different to being in a friendship.

[@JCstone1000]

Something that 90% of guys need to get through their head is that ending up being friends with a girl is not "losing". If you bear this in mind whilst dating, you're dating life will be so much more fulfilling and there will be a lot less pressure.

[@LionelLordOfTheThundercats]

It is losing if that is not what you wanted. Look at it like you went in for a job interview and did not get the job, so you took a position as an intern hoping that it would lead to a permanent position and you end up working their for free. No matter if you enjoy the work or not, that was not your goal, so you lose. And even worse in when you see someone else get the job you were working so hard to get.

[@LionelLordOfTheThundercats]

@@thomasdixon8656 Of course I have female friends, because my comment was not that men and women can be friends, it was that if you set out to be more then friends and you are push into only being friends then you are losing because you have a relationship that you don't want. It is possible to get to know women that you don't want to be involved with romantically and that is not the friend zone, that is just friendship.

[@maarten452]

Oh it's losing alright. if you wanted to have a relationship more than friends with her it's losing, because she's not attracted to you and doesn't want to take things further. The best thing you can do then as a guy is to just move on to the next girl if you aren't interested in being friends with that girl. But the reason that you said 90% of guys is because the other 10% doesn't struggle with the friendzone, you know why? Because they're part of the small pool of men that women are attracted to sexually so they don't even have to try, meanwhile the rest has to pick up the scraps. And the reason it's like this is because most women have the freedom to pick/choose any guy they want. They should be grateful for that. Also YOUR dating life not "You're" (Don't know who taught you English) Your dating life will NOT be much more fulfilling if you think that you're not losing when friend zoned, because you'll just be friends forever with that one girl never moving on, hoping she might like you one day, but she won't. She will never.

[@aceman0000099]

Plus the whole relationship would be built on the fact that you thought she was good enough, but she doesn't think you're good enough for her, so there's a clear social imbalance which is a bad dynamic.

[@chunificationify]

Holy shit no, that is the absolute losing state, it would be horrible

[@lizziek9517]

I've always had a hard time being friends with guys. Even when I'm clear at the beginning that I'm not interested in dating or anything sexual, in time they become jealous, time consuming, and angry that I won't put out. It's hard... I understand those guys thought if they just kept spending time with me, that it would change into romance. But maybe they should've just taken the No at the beginning as the answer.

[@ianksexton]

Guys are dense af. Unless you dont go straight out and say "i dont like you like that" they will persist. Its not a sex thing for most guys. Its more of wanting a more emotional connection with someone who you can also call your friend. Guys dont have girls just at every whim like girls have guys; because of social norms, if we dont persist then elwe are ever closer of dieing alone and/or unhappy. Which is one of my greatest fears in life.

[@name-fv4du]

@Scooters Videos when did anybody said they wanted to fuck?

[@SSJfraz]

It's more likely that they weren't interested at all. But being a female, you naturally have a highly inflated ego and self opinion of yourself and automatically assume that every guy you come across wants to fuck you. You're welcome.

[@dominiquedoeslife]

Scooters Videos I already have all of those things in myself. Im good. And I know plenty of assholes who play the guitar and it doesn’t make them any cooler.

[@Trent_Skylark]

Guys have to learn to treat their females friends like their guy friends. Which means occasionally being an asshole and bailing on you. I’ve learned that if you make your female friend a priority and give her special treatment then you will catch feelings. You have to give yourself space to also live you life and actually date

[@dummy9060]

Anyone else notice Jeremy before and after the transition?

[@xandersalamander8182]

I just paused the video looking for this comment!!

[@tsubijohn6310]

Tf😶

[@steiner3626]

Larissa Tiberi he changed genders?

[@alleyway8627]

@@steiner3626 he's trans

[@danniruthvan3265]

Oh man! I didn’t even notice.

[@neosoontoretro]

I know this is meant to ironic, but it actually reflects what real people think. They think that the "friend zone" was invented by Friends. But it wasn't, Friends just gave it name. Unrequited love has been around since... forever.

[@txmilxssi7803]

that's the whole point of the video..? the term Friend zone is in discussion here, not the actual meaning behind it

[@8Rincewind]

neosoontoretro also the Friend Zone does not equal unrequited love. If you actually loved somebody that "just" wanted to be friends then you would fucking cherish that friendship. Instead as soon as guys find out a girl doesn't want to fuck or date them, they lose interest. They talk it up like it's love and they imagine they're the "Ross and Rachel" of their world, but really they're just self centred dicks.

[@seignee]

8Rincewind I feel kinda bad cos I was in that situation where I was best friends with a guy and I liked him but he didn't feel the same way. I kept seeing comments like this when I was asking for advice on the friendzone and instead of facing the reality I still liked him, I pretended that I already moved on because I was "supposed" to cherish the friendship and that I should be "satisfied" with that. A year later after that, I got so choked I couldn't continue the friendship. So I told him the truth and he told me he always knew I still had feelings for me but he wanted to get closer, so he insisted it was his fault... But we did end on good terms. We had a proper closure just to make sure everyone was on the same page. 1 month later I'm still tempted to MESSAGE him again telling him I miss him. But it would just break the promise I made to him and myself... and I don't want his girlfriend to get hurt.

[@Error0101]

8Rincewind Yeah, but sometimes staying around that person, especially after they find someone, hurts. It hurts to be around them, and it's unhealthy.

[@DavidRodriguez-ux5ye]

8Rincewind emm not really I have been friendzoned twice and in both cases I am still friends with both of them yeah I took a time off while I tried to loose those felings but then I returned to the friendzone

[@dani010203stor]

to be honest i always felt it a little insulting that no guy would want to be my friend but many would want to date me. I have no male friends, the only ones that i had only wanted to be with me in a romantic way, and it actually makes me sad i'm kind of afraid of making male friends cause (if it's how it has always been) they will try to date me, i will reject them, i will end up losing them and that will really hurt me. cause my friendship is not enough apparently (sorry for the rant)

[@PyroNinja713]

If you're a typical straight female and you mostly like girly shit you're not going to find guy friends, unless they're exceptionally feminine, which usually means they're gay. Sorry, but being just friends with people means having common interests and feelings, which normal straight guys, and normal straight girls do not. That's just the way reality works.

[@tattooedgirl22]

@@PyroNinja713 You are so fucking wrong on so many levels it's not even funny! I have only one true best friend and he is a guy. Actually my boyfriend is also mu best friend but that's besides the point. Me and Tyler have been friends since we were in grade school. We both just turned 29 last month. We are completely different, we are both attractive but we don't see each other in that way. We have somewhat common interests but at the same time like I said we're complete opposites! and I see him at least once a week and talk to him multiple times a week and that hasn't changed since we were little kids. I have multiple girlfriends who have best friends that are guys. Douchebag men like yourself are the reason a lot of men don't have friends that are girls! When we were younger Tyler used to get made fun of all the time by men like yourself because "his best friend was a girl that he did not fuck" and it was disgusting! But he wasn't a douchebag and let other people's small minded and stupid opinions affect his friendship with me. So please stop telling this poor girl who has had bad luck because a lot of guys are pigs... that "she can't have a best friend that's a guy because that's the way the world works" That's the way the world works for you and any other person who thinks like you. You construct your own world views and that's why you think like that. And also you let other ignorant people cloud your judgement or change your thoughts and ideas on certain subjects as well. There are more people who don't agree with you in this world than do, thank the gods! To anyone who believes his bullshit please don't! His view is a typical douchebag male view on this subject!

[@tattooedgirl22]

Please read the comment I left for the douchebag that tried to say you can't have a best friend that's a guy! Yes you can girl and don't let anyone tell you different!

[@tattooedgirl22]

@@PyroNinja713 I also forgot to add that my best friend Tyler is a typical manly guy that is not feminine in any way. He likes to work out and go fishing and spend a lot of time in the woods. And I'm a typical girly girl who loves girly shit. I don't do any of the activities mentioned above with him so that proves your theory wrong that we have to have common interests like that to be best friends. It also doesn't matter if you're straight bisexual or gay. That has absolutely nothing to do with a guy and a girl being best friends! Lmfao

[@PyroNinja713]

@@tattooedgirl22 lmao, triggered much? It must be because you're so full of shit.

[@jmaan3]

Damnit why do I keep coming back to this show? It always either makes me depressed or feel bad about myself.

[@emanym]

It makes me feel old.

[@seanmiller9136]

Learning moment?

[@joseaguilar3323]

What was depressing about this one? Seemed very uplifting to me.

[@panchodelocho9503]

José Aguilar hes the guy who believes in the friendzone

[@sebasfavaron]

This just makes you think about your life. You should really make time for yourself one day in the middle of the countryside and see how the thoughts just come poooouring in. It's actually necessary to do it from time to time I find

[@adiahaalexander9359]

"Oh I'm *MAID* of Honor" holy shit I busted out laughing at that

[@thenoremac2685]

The friendzone isn't a case of "you should have sex with me because I'm nice to you". It's about unrequited attraction/love between friends. Have you ever fallen in love with a close friend only for it to blow up in your face because they don't feel the same way? It sucks... a lot.

[@fairy5668]

Yeah but it's not BECAUSE they see you as a friend, even if they say it is. It's because they just aren't. interested. in. that. way. They don't even need a reason to not be interested. They just aren't.

[@mmmuuuuuuuuiiiiiiiiirrrrr]

​@@fairy5668 Well said.

[@ichsehnursoaus]

Yes and that's when one better takes a time out from the friendship.

[@mikhailstewart]

The friendzone doesnt exist. If your intention is to be friends then be friends. If it's unrequited love.. then that's something totally different

[@aceman0000099]

​@@mikhailstewartwhy is unrequited love not 'the friendzone'?

[@decoydamsel]

What I find so frustrating about being friends with guys is that they almost always treat our friendship like a way to get into a relationship or they keep me around as an "option". Or even just springing their feelings on me all of a sudden and after I turn them down they think everything is going to go back to the way it was before. No matter how clear I make my intentions I can never feel 100% comfortable because they always want to read my friendship as interest in more. It just makes me so uncomfortable.

[@Zeecarver]

it's because you're a decoy

[@ryanwebb4045]

DecoyDamsel i can see ur perspective but if a guy is interested in a woman hes not going to want to keep it as just a friendship because it feels like hey im literally nvr gonna be intimate with you now watch as i am with someone else

[@user-qz2ld3vt2d]

rage of achilles, that isn't true. You will pick up these pheromones on the first time as well. I have many girls with whom i am just friends. It is just not true. Especially because according to your logic you will fall for everybody. ps. pheromones do not only influence male behavior, unless you can show me a study that there is more of an effect on male behavior. If there isn't such a study woman and man should be equally affected by the pheromones.

[@user-qz2ld3vt2d]

rage of achilles, that is in your own wording only the case if he is closer to an other girl. This doesn't mean that you wont be able to get into a relationship, but it means it will be harder right? Anyway, i gladly remain a virgin for ever if i have the choice between that or losing my friends.

[@-Zakhiel-]

Well... stop having so much men friends... Problem solved.

[@marionetteraconteur]

I prefer "platonic life partners"

[@tamily4663]

Have you noticed ted's name tag at thr graduation is HI MY NAME IS WHAT? MY NAME IS WHO?? MY NAME IS

[@drewechols83]

0:31 Jeremy before he transitioned

[@jonathanaugustin647]

I'm pretty sure both sexes get "friend-zoned", though the animation seems to imply that it's one sided. I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with feeling hurt over unrequited love... it doesn't make you a bad person. It's about how one reacts to it.

[@lordmew5]

Jonathan Augustin this isn't a review this is a character im sure the author knows both sides can occur but THIS character obviously dislikes the men side a little more and that is natural these characters are made with flaws thats the charm of the show and i agree its fine to be hurt by unrequited love but you cant blame it on the other person you should never expect a romantic relationship because a platonic relationship works really well

[@markneillmusic9082]

Jonathan Augustin I agree I despise how some people believe they are entitled to relationship just because they are nice to someone else or they think they would be good together. It is understandable to be saddened by the fact that you have been rejected that's natural when you get angry over it that's when it is a problem

[@hannahstork6398]

I took this video to be about the way plutonic male-female relationships are viewed, rather than about the experience of unrequited love. And about how friendship isn't less meaningful/needed as romantic relationships

[@Szarko32c]

It is one sided. Guys chase multiple girls, girls can chose multiple partners. So a girl will always be in a relationship, while guys will be in friendzone in most cases.

[@theluckypoptart2945]

It's not wrong to feel hurt but it is to just be there waiting for them to fall for you. Most of the time that won't happen. It's just one person who thinks they have a good friend and one who has feelings. Most not good feelings. Yeah there's love but you also end up with resentment, anger and jealousy. It's best to just cut ties if you can't get past the feelings.

[@watcher314159]

I had a crush and was friendzoned pretty hard (that day I learned why it's called heartbreak). But I knew that the friendship we had was extremely valuable in itself, and even though it was sometimes hard to keep my emotions in check and relatively untangled, I put in that effort gladly. All of my other friends were kind of in awe of this response, and while not everyone responded positively with my decision, I think I helped some of them change their perceptions of themselves and relationships, simply by, as I thought of it at the time, making the mature decision. Even though she's since moved away and we haven't really kept in contact, I still love her, both romantically and as one of the best friends I've ever had. And while both of those emotions are valuable, I think we all know which one I treasure more. People Watching is consistently one of the best series on the internet, clever and insightful, funny but not so much that it's distracting, and mature to an extent that I've not seen except in a couple of other places. Oh, and When Harry Met Sally is as much to blame for the whole friendzoning problem in our society as FRIENDS.

[@Zforce911]

As someone who lost a best friend by giving in to societal pressure and trying to invest in a relationship... this hit home. I think about her everyday... I really wish I knew this was an option back then.

[@PlasmaMongoose]

So the Friend zone is someone who doesn't ever shut up about late 20th century TV shows.

[@zyaicob]

Hell is other people essentially

[@izzy1221]

Why is she holDING FRIES IN HER PALM LIKE THAT. SHOW RUINED. GOODBYE. (Jk)

[@garfieldbiggestfan3443]

Isagail Carshuen cURSED.

[@Mikol_Billy]

Isagail Carshuen lmao that's exactly what I was thinking. Like. Stop

[@InteractiveIdea]

Isagail Carshuen lol

[@finx1582]

Have a great day everyone!

[@cracked]

Hey! Thanks!

[@midnightconfections3991]

Positivity supported by more positivity. I hope we get to a point where this becomes the internet norm

[@abyy1619]

Soulmates: souls bound together Romance is irrelevant

[@charliemaddick4532]

Dammit, this series- I've never related to something so much before. I literally drop everything when a new episode comes in.

[@Mike-schmike]

this is probably the first series i've been excited for new episodes. I love most cracked things, but sometimes it's pop culture references I don't understand/follow. This series is just about being a person - and i've been a person for ages now, so I can usually relate.

[@mikececconi2677]

WHAT DID YOU SAY? MARTHA! MY PLATONIC BEST FRIEND IS MARTHA! THAT'S MY DAD'S PLATONIC BEST FRIEND'S NAME!

[@CaptBackwards]

Mike Cecconi spoilers much

[@freiherrchaos2549]

Love

[@Microfoot]

I don't think it's as simple as the friend zone not existing, it just doesn't exist in the way that those kinds of assholes think it does. It's not some deliberate attempt by women to manipulate men or anything. It's simply when one person has feelings for their friend and for whatever reason it doesn't go anywhere yet they still remain friends. Simple as that, and it has nothing to do with gender. I'm a guy and I had a friend who was interested in me, and for a number of reasons I never returned those feelings so nothing became of it. Eventually we drifted apart, but for a while I did put her in the friend zone.

[@owenbevt3]

Yes this is true I can confrime as someone who was often 'friendzoned' when young and immature and acted as a dickhead about it but also more recently as a full (kinda)balanced adult and been sad but ultimately ok and remained genuinely valued friends.

[@michaelwolf8690]

The problem with this thinking is how awkwardly it fits the nomenclature. When you are put in a state it is not within your control or by your choice. If you could say that your friend wandered aimlessly and found herself in the friendzone but what we're talking about is someone being put in a role they aren't consenting to. Your friend desired a romantic relationship but you placed her in a different role regardless of the romantic overtures or personal sacrifices she made trying to demonstrate her love. She's not an asshole for thinking she should be a voluntary partner in her relationship with you.

[@balls261]

Exactly. It's funny how it's become some sort of misogynist thing to many people because I think - originally at least - it's more harmless than that in nature. Sure there are douche bags who do just think women owe them sex because they were nice to them, but that's not what the friendzone is to me. The friendzone applies to both genders equally and it's a real thing that everyone goes through at one point or another, usually in high school or something. I wonder what all these feminists who think the friendzone means that specific definition of emotional manipulation call it when they have a crush on their friend who doesn't reciprocate, because that's all the friendzone really is. I don't get how it became so distorted and malicious so quickly.

[@Microfoot]

I didn't force her to be my friend, though. She had the option of choosing not to be my friend, which is what she eventually did once she gave up.

[@michaelwolf8690]

Then how did you "put her in the" friendzone? For that matter how was she in the Friendzone at all if her interest wasn't being exploited?

[@PurpleGeminite]

I really want to meet the people behind this cartoon and the Cracked office one day. Cracked is just one of those channels that makes awesome content and supports others that make awesome stuff, like this show. Thank you for existing Cracked, you always make my day.

[@desmondcastillo9215]

Idk why but this show gives me hella bojack horseman vibes

[@Crimsontears83]

why do people feel "friendzone" is so sexist against women? women can't be friendzoned? i've done it quite a few times. i have female friends (who i never woke up naked next to either) who have complained to me how this guy that they're really into friendzoned them. I know this is (mostly) satire but i'm getting tired of people who dont know much about people or life acting like they know people and life. That being said i still love this show and the mirror it holds up to society. While i dont agree with every "sjw hipster millennial yadda yadda yadda" thing they say its still nice to have the conversation. Also the reason people ask about relationships is on a basic level that's why we have male and female. for procreation. (hell, not like gay people can avoid the question)we only made up all the feelings and social things we complain about now. we're still just animals.

[@hectroinfectro]

Coining a term does not constitute the invention of a concept.

[@AnthorAlderian]

These videos are like little pills of anti-anxiety. Thank you so much for making them.

[@Quinndango]

Because no one asked: The song at the end is Charlotte by Sam Weber. You're welcome

[@Biggerspoon]

TheMightyEskimo you magnificent human being thank you!

[@the_gypsy_guyy]

TheMightyEskimo Thanks!

[@Thagomizer]

I understand and appreciate the subtle dynamics of male/female friendships that aren't romantic. I also understand that it's misguided to for a lonely young man to "girlfriend zone" a woman he's interested in. But seriously--these guys deserve our compassion, not our scorn or contempt.

[@razvantugulea2898]

Most people don’t understand such friendship between a guy and a girl, because the most of them never had it. It’s a valuable and unique experience in life, so I guess ... you can’t win them all.

[@tiamelancholyjeoncockity]

they are seriously friendship goals, wish I had a friend like that to talk about all the deep stuff and weird things about this society

[@wishbone346]

I agree with the overall message that you can be friends and it isn't a bad thing, but I do think it's important to state that it's okay for someone to not be okay with being "just friends" as well. I mean some people aren't going to be okay with having un-reciprocated romantic feelings, and to ask them to just keep hanging out with that person like nothing happened or to ask the person who doesn't reciprocate the feelings to do the same if it makes them uncomfortable is just stupid. It's not cool to demonize people over their feelings, man.

[@geneirai]

little bit of life advice; if someone doesn't return your romantic affection, get the fuck over yourself. no one owes you jack shit, least of all 'romantic love'

[@wishbone346]

geneirai No, they don't owe you anything but you don't owe them anything either. If you have no desire to "just be friends" then you shouldn't have to be. You're a hypocrite if you think otherwise, bub.

[@DavidRodriguez-ux5ye]

wishbone346 specially if you see that person suffering specially if it is for love and you will never or in a very long term end that love if you see her every day

[@sarahshoemaker6150]

I actually really love this. One of my best friends is a guy, and people always tell us they "ship it" and it gets really obnoxious when you're friends, and not attracted to one another in the slightest. Friendship is something that should be cherished, not seen as "oh, they're JUST friends" or "he's biding his time, and is so into you."

[@Kagamid]

Why is she slowly hovering away from him when she notices the other guy at the bar?

[@geneirai]

because she wants to hook up with the other guy at the bar

[@carnivoriousleaf]

Based on my interpretation, she wants a romantic relationship with her friend. She scared to admit it/be direct (anxiety and missed communications seems to be a theme in these animations) so she is moving closer to the unnamed bar-person to see if it gets a response out of the person she feels romantic feelings towards.

[@1995ネクロ]

I think she just wants to delve into the Baskin Robbins, that'd sorta take from the whole point anyway... No matter how thickly it was layed on.

[@damiwilliams267]

because she wants to fuck that other guy

[@Mothman1992]

Because she's waiting for her opportunity to break away from bff to get f'd in the b

[@Dats_Mark]

This is the worst episode of Beavis and Butthead I've ever seen

[@marsinator3675]

Platonic love is just as satisfying and needed as romantic love, it just does different things and takes different forms.

[@allisondoak9425]

My best friend and I are both straight women but I love her more than anyone. Idk I've never experienced the mutual desire to be in a romantic relationship with a guy but I can't imagine that ever being more important than my relationship with her, like possibly comparably important but yea. Romantic relationships are put on such a pedestal and like we're a social animal and we're capable and in need of multiple deep relationships.

[@KD-ou2np]

... ummm? It kinda sounds like you're romantically in love with your best friend?

[@aniqaibu032]

people watching is legit my favorite series on this channel

[@RobertJones-gq3jq]

I love how this shows Jeremy's transition from AFAB (0:30)to male (5:09).

[@bannafeet123]

so they have been having the same conversation for years, if they don't like each other why do they talk about it so much?

[@damiwilliams267]

because they claim people keep bugging them about secretly wanting a romance/being in the friendzone or downplaying how important their friendship is to them.

[@cuseruser1489]

Matthew are u dumb?

[@huntersteel85]

there's also the ending

[@wclark3196]

He's gay and in the closet.

[@the1stsinisterbra]

omg I JUST noticed the waitress! must rewatch everything for more waster eggs! I love how diverse and inclusive this show is!

[@QuidamByMoonlight]

The cold, hard truth: The woman likes some of the things about him, but thinks she can do better. She wants the taller, brawny blonde at the bar. Until...she either realizes he’s actually the real catch (which it looks like that is what the ending implies), or, she lands the guy she really wants. After all, she’s not likely to be attracted to a guy that loses in a fight, and she has to come to *his* rescue. She wants someone that can protect her! That’s not “MRA” stuff...that’s just what happens.

[@Eric-yt7fp]

Legit awesome cartoon.

[@BlackCover95]

If they're meant to be strictly platonic, why does the bench they sit on in the end have their initials in a heart?

[@InteractiveIdea]

BlackCover95 coz you can have love without sex.

[@Ronicalter]

BlackCover95 if I had to take a guess ?!he had a crush on her for a year after they first met . They met in seventh grade and he was being picked on . But she became his friend and stuck around . He did the cliche carving because he's a kid . When the hormones are wild everyone is viable even friends.

[@xenoblad]

BlackCover95 platonic love? Like a bromance?

[@InteractiveIdea]

Not every act of love is sexual. Do you love your mother? Your house you live in? Your pet?

[@greatpower6063]

yeah but i'd never put my name in a heart with my mother's name nor with that of my pet ...and naming a house?! Get real!

[@vvante2147]

That's just a platonic relation ship and I'm so happy to see it in this serie like I also appreciate that they shown us Jeremy before transition,,,

[@jean-paulaudette9246]

I wouldn't call this show funny, per say, but I'm definitely impressed with the honesty & courage, and insight herein. Also, good animation, which often makes me happy just on it's own. Thanks for the work. I hope it helps a lot of people. I can see that potential in it.

[@FrankieSmileShow]

These have all been really good so far. Damn cracked, why you keep putting out good things

[@chittyblue3635]

This is so important for asexual and aromantic people. We are constantly told through media and society that love and intimacy and romantic relationships are the only way to be fulfilled and that's really not the case. My best friend of 10 years is the most important thing in the world to me and if I was given the choice between a lifetime with her or meeting and marrying my soulmate, I would choose her every. Single. Time. Because she is my platonic soulmate. She perfectly meshes with me, we can always have a full and exciting conversation with barely any effort, and even though she's moved to Sydney she's still the closest person to me. So yes, maybe some people will see those signs and think we should date. But we know that what we have is so special because we don't see the NEED to date. Because the way we love each other is perfectly fulfilling without any of that nasty romantic and sexual intimacy. And that's something that you don't see every day :)

[@ebonytaylor7225]

"Or Maybe I just want to know you in 20 years "

[@jtal3292]

So happy to see Subnormality getting more exposure. Good ideas done well. Favorite of the comics is called Sand Witch. Helped me a lot.

[@Tater_Toot]

5:09 "I'm Commander Shepherd and this is my favorite 2/3rds of a sandwich on the citadel" and "Praise the sunwich"

[@ferox965]

One of my exes is pretty much my best friend. We dated almost thirty years ago. We wound up staying close ever since. She is getting married next year and I'm thrilled and honoured to be there.

[@xerosereify]

Did the waiter have a sex change during the course of those guys friendship?

[@thesewinggeekmiri9029]

THANK YOU!! that's what I was wondering!! Everyone's going on and on about friendzoning, back and forth about how this video is pioneering, this video is bullshit...and I'm sitting here wondering if I was the only one who noticed!! B/c the 'girl' at the beginning has the same tattoos on 'her' arms as the guy at the end!! It's not just subtle, and I applaud Cracked for it.

[@ScreamingWhisper]

In the Confession booth one there is a scene that doesn't show anyone's face talking about being transgendered that is definitely the waiter character and in an animated short released on Cracked many months ago by the same people before this series the exact same character drawing who is a waiter is explicitly stated to be trans.

[@HopeDeepRuns]

Yeah, it's Jeremy. He comes out as trans in episode 10.

[@Hakajin]

Actually, if you go back to the intro video to this series, There's a line that goes, "And there's a gruff looking cop and he'd never guess the server is transgender, and he would never guess that the cop would think that's pretty cool." The server there is Jeremy.

[@huckmart2017]

I was once "friends" with a girl that i was super in love with. She used to tell me that she liked me too but "she wasnt ready for a relationship" or "she valued my friendship more" or "she didn't want to ruin our friendship" yadda yadda. I bought it, and she strung me along on a leash for months. Then one day she gets a boyfriend and gives me some bs about how "it just kind of happend, and probably wouldnt last very long". She even promised me that when it was over that she would make it official with me, because of how patient i was. Another year goes by, All while she would blow me kisses, snuggle up to me on the couch and flirt with me when nobody else was around. It was pathetic. But i was in love, so i went along with it. When their relationship ended she gave me the same speeches as before. It took me ages but at that moment i realized that she was only keeping me around as a confidence booster. It destroyed me. My self esteem that i carefully fostered for 14 years, ruined. I wouldnt even be comfortable talking to women for years later, and The whole thing could have been avoided if she had just told me straight up that she wasnt interested. After all that, can you seriously say the friendzone is made up? That im the asshole in that situation?

[@johnyliltoe]

I'm so confused! How do people use the term friendzone? I've only ever used it for a situation where I, or someone else, develops romantic feelings for a close friend but it's one sided. Not an extension of that BS idea that men and women can't be "just friends". Then again, I generally prefer hanging around women, it's too normal for me to have best friends that are female that I'm fine with just being friends.

[@saoirsecameron]

Johnyliltoe the way I’ve generally heard it used is in situations where a person (usually a cis guy) makes advances towards another person (usually a cis woman) that are constantly misinterpreted as purely platonic. This is often but not always accompanied by mysoginistic beliefs such as “nice guys finish last” and “women only date jerks”. In and of itself the concept of unrequited love or misinterpretation of ambiguous behavior isn’t that problematic. Who hasn’t fallen in love with a friend before? Unfortunately however, it’s been latched upon by pick up artists and men’s rights advocates as an example of how feminism “oppresses” and “emasculates” men. In reality, the “friend zone” could be avoided in most cases if the person in love were honest and open about their feelings and the person on the receiving end of those affections felt safe and free to turn down the advances if the feelings were not mutual. Unfortunately in many situations men feel that if they are nice enough for long enough that women will eventually have to change their minds, and women are pressured to let people down nicely or give people a chance even if they aren’t interested.

[@aidenbelanger7867]

Thank you someone needed to say...I couldn't I suck at speaking.

[@vangelbang]

I know someone already gave you the answer but I wanted to add that your idea of what the friend zone was had been correct, however the term got misused by the people mentioned in the explanation the other commenter gave.

[@astoriarego8304]

Once Friendzone was used as a verb, it became a toxic concept. It's something a woman "does to" a guy, as if wanting to be friends with him is a slight. As if the default is sexual attraction, and platonic friendship is the state she is forcing on him by not returning his affection. I have seen it used different ways but so often as proof women don't like good guys because they reject them as dates. And if she has been friends with him a while, it's because she is using him for favors and attention. She knows how the guy feels (always) and if she wants to be friends she is just 'stringing him along.' It really doesn't just mean unrequited love anymore. And if it did, that was a brief meaning quickly overshadowed by the toxic one.

[@gin3868]

incels and nice guys boi, they took he term and made it super awful

[@G00dK4t]

This show is a bit preachy, but very cute.

[@gr8b828]

a bit?

[@jushinkane1244]

It is actually not. If you look at it closely a lot of it ironic. I think they did a good job of sarcastically depicting a certain kind of mindset in people without trying to make them look bad. There are so many clues in it that both actually want a relationship, but do not want to admit it. If you never define what you want, you never have to feel the pain of missing it. Or so we believe...

[@Amantducafe]

Everyone gives away their personal life phylosopy.

[@MrPataka100]

This perfectly describes everything. Except for having the same conversation for decades.

[@pansy2880]

this was really cute. ironically it was very similar to conversations my best friend and i had through high school. we've been dating for almost two years now

[@Evidemment]

I enjoy the series but this one is just silly. First, the "friend zone" implication is that one party would prefer things NOT stay platonic. "Why have you never..." can be answered with "never wanted to." People don't want to have sex because Friends told them they're supposed to want it -- they want it because they're biologically wired to want sex. Second, right after they mention genuine, good reasons for people who could normally be in a relationship to not see each other as sexual prospects (different sexual needs and long-term goals), they immediately ruin it by perpetuating an idiotic belief that sex somehow ruins what would otherwise be good relationships. "Maybe I still want to know you in 20 years." Like, yeah, I get that relationships can come and go, but for a show that's largely about discussing common expectations and how they may be flawed, this one's pretty obtuse. Worse, that myth is the sinister one behind the whole "friend zone" concept. The "don't let them friend zone you" advice stems from the notion that if a person becomes too comfortable around you and values your support and respect too much, they'll abandon any romantic interest in you for fear that pursuing the romance would "ruin" the friendship. This shitty advice is made practical in an environment where people are led to believe that they must choose between having someone in their life for a long time or having sex. This actually encourages people to pursue relationships based on superficial physical attraction but to avoid such relationships with people they're emotionally compatible with, which is no formula for success in mature adults. Somehow we're supposed to believe that two people can be so amazingly in sync that they always want to spend time together and support and trust each other, but a relationship between the two of them -- even a failed one that turned out to be a mistake -- would result in their no longer talking to each other? Some sort of hurt feelings or unforgivable betrayal that colored their interaction poorly? Like, if they DID get drunk and wake up in a hotel room together, that they'd shake hands and say "that was fun while it lasted" and never speak again? Cause that's fucking retarded.

[@carnivoriousleaf]

I feel like I watched a slightly different video than you. I felt that the video was trying to show a "friendzone" relationship just as is. In my interpretation female-character desired male-character (I point at her bringing up comments about "what do you say about our relationship, how she talked about her mother's questioning of their relationship, and the bar scene where she stays anchored toward her friend and she approached the man in the yellow shirt). Now I might be totally wrong, but if my interpretation is forced to stand that makes the woman's words about "I'd like to know you in 20 years" is a fear of the character not a norm or the expected consequence What I feel the video is trying to portray is the overt theoretical discussion (really it's more of a rant) with a physical portrayal. The thesis would then be in the results, both people seem happy content, the female admits that she's had an unsuccessful dating life. It's an unstable ending, which sorta fits with the feel of People Watching (Speed Dating: people don't find eachother. Musician: no change in behavior.)

[@ElleKelsheimer]

American culture makes us super possessive about sexual partners. It's hard to not be affected by it and hard to predict if you will be.

[@mikkimankh766]

Well put. Though , people don't have sex because their friends told them too. I mean obvi, but if you have that kind of deep bond with someone , especially someone you found attractive , you probably had a daydream or two, and wouldn't be rueing the idea if the "fallout " wasn't disastrous to your guys friendship.

[@sailorspaghetti2376]

I think the point is that they feel it would be weird to wake up in an apartment naked together. I have a platonic relationship with a fuckton of mutual support and affection and we also feel it'd be weird if we started dating or whatever. Not like it would ruin the relationship, more like it would be awkward as FUCK.

[@mikkimankh766]

+Sailor Spaghetti maybe I'm ...naiiivee...to this wholee thing but what's so bad about awkward? 😞I mean it's only temporary? It'll pass... wouldnt it...? 😒😓

[@EvanSnowWolf]

"At least it weeds out the judgemental people." he says immediately after judging people.

[@revilo314]

Ross is fine. Everyone else is horrible to him. Why can't they leave him alone. Jesus. I wish Ross could just live alone away for all those awful "friends". He should have enemyzoned humanity.

[@fcm3d]

So no one told you life was gonna be this way.....

[@HannibalHanslaughter]

*clapping sound*

[@JadedeaJade]

I'm a tomboy, so I've always had male friends off and on ever since I was little girl all the way up until friendzone was invented and then suddenly it was forbidden. I still acted like I always do but was told I couldn't because it was confusing the men and giving them mixed signals. Mixed signals, df? How is friendship mixed signals? Hey you wanna play Siege? Up for Minecraft? Watched the latest episode of Stranger Things? How is that, hey man, wanna fawk? Suddenly I came off like I was some desperate broad looking for men to friendzone on purpose cause I needed men in my corner in case my water was about to get shut off. And when I did befriend a guy he took it waaaaayy too far and had this fantasy world of being in a situationship. He had a relationship with me, meanwhile, I watched anime a few times with him. It was so simple in the 90s, why is this shit so unnecessarily complicated?!?!?

[@Ronicalter]

Damn . This series is really good so far.

[@brebytheway]

"I think sitcoms and reality are just friends" this is perfect lol 👌👌👌

[@ErinskiEasy]

If you think men stuck in the friend zone get bitter, you haven't seen a woman stuck in the friend (or even friend with beneifts) zone, they get downright hostile, psychotic and terrifying and they NEVER let it go.

[@ErinskiEasy]

Even years later when they get married and have children with other dude(s)

[@joachimmacdonald2702]

"are you two bros or what?" "nonono, that's nothing, were just in a relationship"

[@MissAnitaGuerra]

You guys keep getting better!! So proud of you!!!

[@hershellumiere]

You know what's really infuriating? how girls complain about guys not wanting to be in the friendzone but the thing is that when a dude takes you up on that they are often times really shitty friends who ignore you when you reach out. For me its really fucking hard to reach out to people and try and talk for someone to willingly ignore me hurts and infuriates me to no end.

[@jessimaster]

This was my favorite people watching episode. That said, I just re-watched it and couldn't help latching on to this one part of there conversation where they say that they will be friends with certain people in the next 20 years because they aren't sleeping with them. It just struck me as being very incorrect this time around. Long term relationships take work regardless of whether or not sex is involved. We as a culture want life long marriages and such, but have become cynical about whether or not romances can even last that long. It's sad to say that both romances and friendships end. But this means that you shouldn't always be afraid of having a sexual/romantic relationship just because of fear of cutting off ties with them. However the video also mentions that sometimes this should be avoided because the two people have different sexual needs and life goals ect. and that's obviously fine.

[@jonathanbottorff3997]

I don't know about you, but I've always defined the friendzone (for case of guy likes girl) as when a guy likes a girl who doesn't reciprocate the feelings and instead of moving on and dating other people, he remains friends in hopes that someday she changes her mind. The continued romantic feelings is what makes it the friendzone instead of just friends and it's for that reason guys will give other guys shit for being friendzoned. Because the healthy thing to do would be to move on and date other people. It's nothing about "women owing anything".

[@jessies5513]

shad mathers understanding that would be accepting women saying no. but some people think that means "I'll change my mind if you keep asking".

[@sethobannion3149]

Yeah, friendzone means unreciprocated feelings and the dynamic of one party (most often the guy) wanting a sexual/romantic relationship and the other party only wanting friendship. (and yes, friendship is indeed lesser, according to triangular theory of love) This stupid narrative that "friendzone = women owe men sex for being friends" comes from a lot of dudes in the friendzone being salty and whining about it on the internet.

[@Anderson_Roger]

FRIENDS was a good fucking show. Period.

[@zenyogasteve401]

Double like. They are meant for each other. Completely open and honest about the philia and pragma they have for each other. they even add that they want it to last a lifetime, and it doesn't have to be eros, even though that would be perfectly fine too. they see stereotyped relationships and reject them.

[@catuuucha]

This is one of the best things I've seen in a long time. I love it, the transgender characet is by far my favorite one, the friendhip, good depression representation, greate characters, I really love it, and hope for more episodes.

[@catuuucha]

SOON PLEASE

[@alpacaobsessed9862]

This was so good, man. People see me with my best friend who's a dude and they assume I'm in a relationship with him but if I'm in a relationship with a girl they just wanna assume she's my sister or best friend. I've also recently started cutting off dudes I'm friends with when they start making weird sexual comments about me despite me telling them that I'm gay, something I think a lot of people need to do.

[@paulinabringas98]

Also I still love friends

[@joshviator7365]

Paulina Bringas Amen, the show is legitimately funny

[@TheCarrotBush]

Paulina Bringas same