How I became a "single mom by choice" - Summer Lovret

[@susanyoung374]

Thank you so much for sharing. This is very very helpful. I am 48 years.... I am about to start the process on my own. You just gave me the courage to step up. Thanks again.

[@RandomPerson-xs2ud]

how is it going? :)

[@SummerLovret]

How's your journey going Susan? :)

[@DJ-ts5uv]

Yes!! This is me. I am unmarried and running out of time biologically. I too struggled with the concept of single motherhood. I cried for days when my Dr. told me about my low probability of getting pregnant...and I cried even more at the prospect of becoming a single mom. It totally feels like failure 😞. But after I finished crying about it, I realized that I was either going to be a mom or not. These are my choices at this point and I am choosing to be a mom. I will start the fertility process in January because I need to know that I did everything I could to be a mom. It’s an exciting, scary thought, but I know it’ll be worth it in the end. Thank you for sharing your story. ❤️

[@SummerLovret]

I'm so glad you are proceeding towards your dream of motherhood! Please know that even if it's too late to use your own eggs, you can adopt and embryo ...or a live baby. You are NOT out of options here. It's women like you, who truly want to be a mom, who SHOULD be moms.I know there's that nagging feeling of failure in the back of your mind...I'm still working on completely getting rid of that feeling...the joy you will have when you actually become a mom goes a long way towards helping get rid of that feeling. Very best of luck to you on your journey! :)

[@inkerikavantera]

My thoughts exactly. 💓 Going to IVF next month.

[@jones2277]

how old are you? i'm considering this as well.

[@crystal7743]

You can get donor eggs to if you can't use your own.

[@dyamondcrawford2162]

​@@SummerLovret Hi Summer 😊 I struggled with the thought that everyone around me, my age and younger and older too are having kids and becoming first time moms and not me! Every time someone would post their pregnancy or post their kids on social media, I would become very jealous and into a rage because they would find love and find a man to have a baby with and not me and I feel as though God is taking his sweet time and I don't have time for that! So just recently, I expressed to my godmother that I'm just gonna have to have kids on my own, without a man. I don't need a man to get me pregnant and give me children so I can find a sperm donor and become a single mother by choice. I really love kids! I love them with all my heart ❤️❤️ I really do. It would be great if I would have a set of twins. Identical twin girls 😌

[@isabellevasconcelos1597]

I am 36 and I just froze my eggs yesterday. At the beginning I tought of freezing my eggs to get more time to find someone, but I recently changed my mind and want to do it by myself. Just like you said I don't want to be stuck with the wrong person. Ill be dating and it won't be natural . i think we romanticize a lot the happy couple having children and being all nice and happy. Finding someone does not guarantee that Ill be happier or easier, neither that it will last. By doing it on my own I think it will save me from a lot of headaches and I will be able to make all the decisions, I also wont be let down by having expectation on someone else. I dont even think it's a failure, actually I am sure that it's the best decision I could make. I can always find love afterwards. Whoever loves me will accept my situation as it is. I will start the process within a year. Thank for sharing your story

[@DesireKlingensmith]

I'm in the same situation. Been with a guy for 5 years: he doesnt want kids and I do. We are separating this December. It's been fun and hes an amazing friend, but I need to do this!

[@SummerLovret]

Girl...I hear you! You wont regret it. It has been the absolute joy of my life...way better than I thought it would be.

[@danan1313]

The same thing happened to me. I've spent almost 10 years with someone who kept postponing having children until I had to end the relationship. It was otherwise a good relationship. I don't necessarily regret it but looking back, maybe I shouldn't have ''wasted'' (for lack of a better word) so many years in this particular relationship. Now I find myself with very few years left to meet someone who wants to start a family.

[@SummerLovret]

@@danan1313 I wish you all the luck I didn't have...and all the luck I did. In a way, you can't lose. It's a great life to have a family with a good partner. And it's a great life to have a family on your own.

[@danan1313]

@@SummerLovret What a lovely message, thank you! :) Ideally, I would prefer a partner... But many women start this journey in two and end up doing it themselves anyway; you can have a lazy partner, one that cheats/leaves, falls ill and dies etc. I really want children and if that's the only way, then I am getting used to the idea now, researching this, preparing myself financially etc. Thank you for sharing your story, it helps a lot. Do you think you can talk about how you chose a donor and in detail about how you told your family and friends? How are people reacting to the news when you tell them now? What about the most common concern - children need a male influence. Did you do anything about that? e.g. did you heavily involve male relatives in their upbringing or will you get your kids involved in male dominated sports etc.? What about (God forbid) if something happens to you. Do you have a plan in place? e.g. did you ask close friends to take care of your children if that happens? Maybe you can make a video about all this... :D (I know, I know, didn't I just watch your video and can't I tell you have more important things to do!) If you have already discussed this then my apologies, I will check out your other videos later. If you haven't then apologies for being a bit intrusive! I want to researched this fully and there aren't many people who have been brave enough to share their story publicly. Sorry for the long message :)

[@SummerLovret]

@@danan1313 Clearly you are a thoughtful person! Thank you for all the feedback. I will work on addressing these issues in future videos. As you can imagine, I have limited free time...I'm doing the best I can to put out videos as my schedule permits. I should have some time soon to talk more about these very important topics that you bring up. I really appreciate your input! :)

[@alineswallowtail1974]

Wow, thank you so much for this video… I think you just looked in my head an read about my mind. I‘m 37 and I can‘t hear it anymore: ,,just wait, for everybody is somebody who is waiting for you“… yes they mean well, but…. Thank you so much for encouraging

[@SustainableBunny]

Thank you for making this videos! I'm 27 and I've always wanted to have kids young but I havent found a partner. So I've decided to be a SMBC. If I could afford it I would start now, but in Portugal the wages are usually really low even with a master's degree. So I'm learnig to code so that I can get into a better career field that pays better. Listening to people like you encourages me to keep going and shows that it is possible to have kids without a partner, while making me feel less alone, since I don't know anyone personally who is going through the same thing. Btw, your kids are adorable! ❤

[@SummerLovret]

You are so smart to be planning ahead at your age and heading in the direction of your dreams! I have no doubt that a wonderful life as a mom awaits you!

[@SummerLovret]

You are way ahead of the curve...clearly you are motivated and talented! You keep heading in the direction of your dreams. A wonderful life awaits you.

[@SustainableBunny]

@@SummerLovret Thank you so much for the kind words, Summer! It means a lot. I look forward your next video! Have a wonderful week 🤗

[@cakesinthecity]

Summer please come back!! You inspired me so much. We need more of your words of wisdom ❤

[@hanafri8]

Women are so strong and independent nowadays,and yes, why do you have to wait for a knight in shining armour,they don't exist any way! Few marriages survived any how,and then your children are torn between parents. We have the eggs,and the abillity to be a single parent. Being stuck with a man for the rest of your life is scary. Congratulations to you for being so brave :)

[@dyamondcrawford2162]

Yessss girl! I've had my fair share of bad encounters with men and going on dates and them not ending in a relationship afterwards sooo yeah. All men are dogs fr fr 😤😂

[@tejasmehetre]

You won’t agree, but children need their father (biological) much more than their mum. Statistics on this is pretty clear and all the studies show invariably same results. I’ll leave it to you to decide how wrong it is to deprive a child of his loving biological father.

[@jomr4249]

@@tejasmehetreShe can’t find a loving biological father… that’s the point.

[@fitzgeraldsemelfort3938]

@@tejasmehetrethey don’t care these are the most selfish group of women in the history of this planet

[@fitzgeraldsemelfort3938]

@@jomr4249because she doesn’t want to do what it takes to have a loving husband.

[@dunia103]

I am 24 & even though I am many years away from wanting to have kids.. I’ve enjoyed watching these videos. It takes the pressure off immensely. I am okay with not marrying if I don’t have a healthy relationship/partner. I rather be a single parent but provide my children a safe & happy home. It motivates me to get financially independent & learn more homemaking (personal preference). That way I can be prepared to be a single mom if need be. I know that no matter what happens or what I choose, I will always choose to be safe/happy.

[@harynlaryn]

I totally feel you as my biggest fear is also being stuck with the wrong guy for the rest of my life, I'm 38 and freezing my eggs, because I always wanted to have lots of children, after I achieve more financial stability, I'll definetely have kids even if I can't find the right guy. You're absolutely amazing and your video gave me so much courage. Thank you so much for sharing your story with us💖🌹💕

[@SummerLovret]

You are very welcome....and best of luck with freezing your eggs, that's a smart move to preserve fertility!!

[@fitzgeraldsemelfort3938]

But not the fear of having a child that doesn’t have a father selfish🤦🏾

[@harynlaryn]

@@fitzgeraldsemelfort3938 You see how many fathers in this world are irresponsible and ignorant which results in letting those poor children living in pain, yes of course, the most ideal case is to have a caring and loving father, but many fathers unfortunately aren't, and in that case, not having one might be better.

[@vikavika5636]

“with six feet distancing, i can skip a shower and record a video for you” - you are hilarious 🤣 I love it! ❤️

[@fifisdlo6079]

I want to be on this journey...child care worries me but I decided to not be afraid. I am 32 and I want to be a mom. I will figure it out.

[@SummerLovret]

Hell yes you will! Good for you. It's not an easy path...but you can do this mama (to-be)! :)

[@MB-wq3xp]

Omg you’re such an amazing story teller, thanks for making such a heavy topic so light and fun. I laughed through out.

[@SummerLovret]

So glad you enjoyed the video!! :)

[@fieryblaze1737]

I never looked at SMBC as failure. I always looked at it as people taking control in their own lives and not letting rather or not a partner to show up before they can experience whatever it is they are wanting to experience.

[@pinkkay7235]

Omg that my biggest fear of being with wrong person . But in wanna be a mom . I never new about iui or ici . I only knew about ivf super Expensive. I am so happy I waited and now I am starting the process of IUI.

[@SummerLovret]

Good for you mama!! Best of luck

[@pinkkay7235]

@@SummerLovret thank you 😊

[@thegiantpaperpanda]

Totally can relate. did not find someone I want to hitch my wagon to. I've never been afraid to be on my own, which is why I knew I could do this once I was in a position to do so (next 2-3 years).

[@SummerLovret]

"Didn't find someone I wanted to hitch my wagon to" describes me perfectly!!! Best of luck with your journey!!

[@bloomingale7868]

I’m so blessed to be a subscriber before you reach thousands of new subscribers. I teared up listening to your story because I have all of the same feelings, fears and realizations. My aha moment on being a choice mom happened today and so I’m just beginning to explore this possibility. Thank you for being so refreshingly honest. Choice Moms are some of the bravest women! I feel a weight lifted and a bit of excitement about the future. God Bless You & Your Beautiful Girls 💕 🎀 🩰

[@SummerLovret]

WOW! Thank you for sharing, Bloomingale!! So much hope and so much joy...and so little sleep...await you! I'm so excited for your journey. Please keep me posted!

[@yazminduvall133]

Wow! Thanks for your encouragement 🙏 I won't let anyone get in between my dreams anymore and am moving forward to become a single mom by choice! I wish you and your beautiful girls love and happiness 😊 💕 💖

[@SummerLovret]

Thank you so much Yazmin! :)

[@snowgirl926]

Thank you very much for sharing your story! Truly appreciate! I am in my mid-30s and I am single. I had an unsuccessful 9- year relationship and so here I am. I was depressed because I had sense of failure. The main reasons are I am very traditional and I don’t have a lot of saving because I have many years of schooling (master degrees and a doctoral degree). Three years after last unsuccessful relationship, now I have saved quite a lot of money from frugal living and investment. I feel I am complete now. I am in a good track of retirement planning. So, I am thinking about becoming a single mom by choice. I just subscribed your channel. Please share as much as you can.

[@SummerLovret]

I am very traditional in my heart too...Single Mom By Choice was not my first option...but it's the best option I had and it's a wonderful life! I will be making new videos over Christmas vacation. I will be speaking to women just like you! Please know there is so much hope and joy for you ahead!

[@josiewoo7711]

Summer! I love this - what a blessing it is for you to share so openly your journey, and the arc of your mental and emotional process. I love you and your sweet baby girls. You certainly were born to be a Mama. xoxo

[@MJ-uj4dr]

Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I'm 41 and struggling with letting go of the ideal...getting married before having a baby. I'm single and haven't found anyone to whom I want to be married. Your video has put alot into perspective.

[@sickofit5547]

Me too. I just wonder what do you tell the child.

[@oncerand_directioner]

There's lot of different ways to tell them. One great way that I learned from another solo mom was telling her daughter "Men and women both have different parts to make a baby. Women have eggs and men have seeds. Men who choose to give women their seeds so those women can make babies are called donors and that's what I used to create you"

[@anna8315]

Thanks for the video. I am 39, I have one son from a relationship and will also start now a process to do it alone as I can't stop thinking about three years to have a sibling for him. It gets so painful, that the thought does not go out of my head anymore. It's scary and I am for sure afraid like hell but it's time. I am going to be 40 this year. I waited 4 years, I can't anymore.

[@BauerBeauty]

Girl I’m so glad u shared this I’m going through this right now !

[@yazminduvall133]

You are so brave! Congratulations on your girls, I am going through the same process right now, my fiance is not on board but listening to people like you and your honesty gives me the courage to pursue my dreams. Am 46 and very scared to be a single mother, thanks for skipping your shower and making this video. 🤗

[@SummerLovret]

You go girl! You will not regret chasing your dreams. It's awesome being a mama

[@janjoy9759]

Thank you for sharing! Go for it! I met a lady many years ago. She was 44 at the time and I was in early 30s. She was so beautiful sweet and very smart. We starting talking casual conversation and she shared with me that she doesnt have kids. She married a man who doesnt want kids. And is not going to budge.... needless to say, I saw the pain in her eyes, deep rooted pain of just being STUCK in an unfruitful situation and yet yearning deep down inside for child. No woman should feel that way, let alone wait for a man to see IF he changes his mind... My best friend was in long relationship too, about 4 years... she was hoping he'd change his mind and commit to marriage (let alone, KIDS).... ne never ever did!!!! She wasted 4 years!!! And her window of opportunity...poof.... gone.... at 50.. My heart breaks for her!! And I cannot even phathum when her payments pass etc... being left alone.... I'm seeing this is very very common... That's why I am going this route just like Summer!!!!! Lord bless us and strengthen us and guide us all.

[@clairehartley1582]

Thank you so much for sharing your story! It makes me look forward to my own journey even more!

[@SummerLovret]

Welcome to the club! It really is a wonderful life :)

[@filmmefatale1714]

You're a great storyteller. Definitely going to watch more of your videos. Thanks for your honesty and humor in telling your story.

[@cspencer1810]

This video had changed my life you literally articulated everything I am thinking! I'm at the beginning right now but so excited xox

[@SummerLovret]

Girl, YOU are exactly why I'm making these videos. I wish you every luck on your journey. It's a challenging road, filled with so much JOY!!!

[@kellyfrances9435]

You're such a charismatic person. Thank you for sharing your journey. You really nailed my issue which is that I'm getting over the concept of being a "failure" by considering being a single mom by choice. It's a roadblock for me and this really helps.

[@SummerLovret]

I'm so glad you enjoyed the video! Women like you are exactly the reason I'm doing this :)

[@donagretaisai8763]

Because of you, I decided to freeze my eggs. I did not even know that I could do something like that. Thank you! :)

[@SummerLovret]

This gives me chills! You will not regret it. I wish you the best of luck on your journey to motherhood!! :)

[@donagretaisai8763]

@@SummerLovret Thank you!

[@claritywithkris]

This is so helpful! Thanks for taking the time to share your journey.

[@SummerLovret]

Thanks for watching!

[@RVC0902]

Thanks for talking about how hard dating can be. There are lots of men who don't want kids or they don't have means or they aren't generous.

[@mr.hustleakamike2734]

😂 why would any man be generous with how women manipulate kids for money 😂😂oh HELL NO

[@Niseebell]

Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am seriously considering becoming a choice mom and finding information and support is so helpful. I look forward to watching videos.

[@SummerLovret]

I'm so glad you found my videos! I'm making them for women EXACTLY like you. You can also follow me on instagram @SummerLovret where I post Choice Mom content as well. Being a Choice Mom is a club nobody really wants to be in...but once you're in, it's AWESOME :)

[@jenniferkong2443]

Love this. Especially when you said you did "therapy homeschool" with Brene Brown and Jordan Peterson haha--I also LOVE these two amazingly helpful yet very different authors. Thank you for making this video! xxx

[@NadiaJeanBaptiste-yc3ky]

Thank you my fellow type A sister ❤❤. Thank you dear. This REALLY helped me. You're story and way of thinking is so similar to mine. And you've given me such comfort. 🙏

[@snowdropshinesinthecastle]

Thank you for sharing. I wanted to be a single mom by choice. I hesitate at first but now I'm not 🙂 Wishing you a lot of happiness n blessing.. ❤️

[@vontee4790]

Thank you for your honesty and transparency! This is truly helpful.

[@lolabow5421]

I love your quotes about what people say.. one of my friends said "You could be like Brigit Bardot and just have loads of dogs." I know she was trying to be supportive but can you imagine my face (although I do adore dogs lol!) Big fan in Andorra. You have a lovely sparkle in your eyes

[@SummerLovret]

It's true...people say the wrongest things!! And you could have babies and dogs if you wanted! :)

[@Heathermathewhandhearts]

You remind me of Claire Crawley from the bachelorette! I’m new to this process myself and just accepting the whole decision myself. Thank you for the awesome video!

[@nkinsella8176]

Thank you so much for your honesty, it's videos like these that are giving me so much support while I'm trying to make the decision whether to become a single mum by choice. It's comforting to hear someone having similar doubts and fears to me, which are not talked about on most of these types of videos. I'm so encourages by your story and inspired.

[@snowgirl926]

I would like to budget for being a single mom by choice. Hope you can share breakdowns of the entire costs including freezing eggs, IVF, food, supply and so on. Thank you very much!

[@SummerLovret]

Thank you for the suggestion! I'll have to work on putting something like this together. :)

[@TammyD54]

Wow! This video is so refreshing. Thank you for your honesty and openness. You really described the process of making the decision so candidly. Like you I am very traditional at the end of the day. Thank you!!!

[@strawberriesblueberries2258]

Congratulations what a beautiful baby. You are a good mother.

[@shontellename9252]

You're so hilarious! Thanks for sharing your story!

[@SummerLovret]

Maybe i'm just willing to embarrass myself! haha...thank you! :)

[@Otherwise88]

What an inspiring and encouraging video! Ty for sharing.

[@rpeguero12]

Thank you for this video..I have a daughter that is 7 and I am 31 I want to have another baby but haven't meet the right person..I have been thinking about becoming a choice mom..I am already a single mom but is hard to make the decision.Your video was very helpful..

[@SummerLovret]

I am so glad you found this video helpful. I really have a heart to encourage women considering this option for their lives.

[@NeuroPOP1]

Thanks for existing. I’m Italian. In Italy NO ONE does this or talks about it, ever. I am way more concerned about the money and energy single motherhood will require than peoples opinions, but yes, I’d like to be supported and it’s hard to just think about the judgment I’m going to face.

[@prissymegan5202]

I was really trying to get back together with my ex but I realized he’s just playing games. It hurts realizing someone is lying about wanting a family.

[@prissymegan5202]

Ladies. If a man actually wants a family. There will be no games or gas lighting. He would be by your side actually building something. This is a hard lesson I had to learn.

[@SummerLovret]

It's a blessing in disguise to know upfront that he's not the one to make your family with. I'm sure it sucks right now...but there's always a better option than settling for someone who doesn't really want to be a parent

[@lukki7ster]

I had to pause and have a chuckle when you were describing being stuck with the wrong person. When i was with my ex-fiance, I would be up awake at nights thinking "how did I get here...what am I going to do" needless to say we are no "exes" and now im watching this video :)

[@SummerLovret]

I know some girls just wanted to be picked...by anyone! But that's just not me...and I am 1000% glad I never settled for the wrong guy. Being a Choice Mom is alot of work...but sooooo worth it!! Good luck on your journey!!

[@janjoy9759]

I hear ya! Felt same with my ex fiance. We were planning wedding and had decided to go for premarital counseling. After sharing some events with counselor, I learned that my fiance was a covert (hidden) narcissist!!! I didnt even know what that was!!! I jumped off that ship as fast as I could say "juuuuummmp!".... wasted years, but glad I made a healthy decision to preserve my heart AND ovaries! I froze them too way back when.... my story is similar to summers !!!

[@lukki7ster]

@@janjoy9759 Such a relief to know that other people had decided not to go through with a wedding if it didn't feel right. My ex happened to be on the autism spectrum. High functioning ( Asbergers?) While there is nothing wrong with that, it totally mimics narcissism and I had to go. Good luck on your mommy journey!!!

[@vikavika5636]

Love love love this video!

[@graci.toruno12]

I love it! I am currently 29 and I want to be a single mom but I want to choose the father and I want the father to be someone close to me.

[@LydiaMuchina-jb6sv]

Like me also

[@missblessed100]

Thanks for sharing your story! I love your energy.

[@RoxiiYolii]

Did you choose to have girls? I'm up there in age, but have been assured by an entire floor of natal nurses and OB/GYN's that I literally have until I am just past 50... I find that I am not built for a partner but would love to have children. However, I'm curious, will I be able to choose my child's gender.

[@SummerLovret]

When you do IFV you can have them test the embryos for chromosomal abnormalities...and find out the sex in the process. However, you get what the good Lord gives you...so if all your embryos are the same sex...then He made the choice for you! I had all girls and 1 boy embryo, so yes I did pick girls. My dream was 2 girls. Thank you to the powers that be for letting my dreams come true!

[@akad3422]

LOVE this video! 👩‍👧‍👧 Thanks for the inspiration! ❤

[@Missalyss25]

Can you please do a video about choosing a sperm donor? What were you looking for and why you choose the sperm donor you did. And if your daughters have the same sperm donor or different. I just found your channel and I love all the advice you are providing for women who want to be SMBC ❤️

[@SummerLovret]

Great idea...I will do that! Thank you for the comment

[@janjoy9759]

Yes great topic for sure!!

[@katekate8973]

Thanks for sharing your story.

[@everydayimwingingit3875]

You ladies are amazing. ❤️

[@kaylamurchison8732]

Love this so much, thanks for sharing :)

[@Kayyllaa_t]

I'm not 100% sure I belong here, as I'm only 19. But I have already decided that I want to be a single mother by choice.It won't be accepted by others, but that's alright because I'm not living for others, I'm living for me!! I have ALWAYS wanted to be a mom, my mom said I was around three when I first told her I wanted a baby lol! However, I'm different from most people (obviously, or else I wouldn't be here lol) so most people don't want to be with me. I know, I know, I'm still young, but I've always wanted to have children young (if it were up to me I'd already have kids lol) and that's my dream. I've never been in a relationship before, and after years of watching messy, draining, stressful, relationships, I've decided I don't want one! My mom said "you want to be a mom, not a wife or girlfriend" and that's exactly it!! Plus my idea is very different from others and I've seen my sister fight constantly over parenting choices with her husband, I don't want that. I'm slightly crazy lol, but I'm hoping to start my journey fall/winter of next year! So I'll be 20 and I want to make sure I'm financially stabled, moved out into a nice home, and have everything planned!! Thank you for sharing your story! ♡

[@jamesmoon3844]

Not a good idea, honey. If you ask me, my advice is to get married before you have a child. Being a single mother is definitely not worth it.

[@Kayyllaa_t]

Well, I didn’t ask you, nor did I ask for your advice. I’ve already made up my mind and I’m comfortable and happy with it! Especially lately. A relationship is the absolute last thing I want, and even if I did get into a relationship I would NEVER get married! Have a good day, James 😌

[@z7z766]

@@jamesmoon3844 fckk off scrote. Males like are threatened because women are choosing to go their own way which means no sex. Sex is the only your depraved @ss is worried about.

[@z7z766]

@@Kayyllaa_t may I know how are you going be financially stable and afford a whole house at age of 20? What type of career do you have?

[@Kayyllaa_t]

This was almost 2 years ago. I did not end up starting my journey when I wanted due to my mental health. I’m working on myself and working more slowly towards where I want to be. I work in childcare, but am taking a break to prioritize myself. I’ll save up and move out just as any other person would! But not now 😌

[@isabel1812Ao]

Blessed my ignorant young heart... 🤣 🤣 🤣. Ohh. That's me 2 years ago. Thank you so much for sharing your story. God bless you and your babies.

[@SummerLovret]

Right?! I can laugh now....Best of luck on your journey to motherhood Isabel!

[@Kiki-AndBeyond]

Thanks for the great video! Please tell me why you chose IVF as oppose to IUI? I'm still trying to decide which one.

[@SummerLovret]

I had frozen my eggs...and to use the frozen eggs you have to do IVF. And you can do more genetic testing via IVF vs IUI. If I had been younger, I probably would have gone the IUI route...but I was late 30's with some underlying issues, so I didn't want to waste any time. I was ready to go!! :)

[@nguyenkimanh4815]

i love this video so much, thanks a lot

[@janjoy9759]

I'm thinking of doing it too! What do you tell your girls about their "dad"?

[@SummerLovret]

Nothing yet because they are too small...but it's something I'm giving alot of thought. One of my friends is working on a book to read choice babies...that should be a nice place to start!

[@jfarrare]

Expose your child to families that are non- traditional and other smbc. With your unconditional love your child will be just fine.

[@MP-nj1qy]

I'm 36. I have been in a relationship for 3 years, and had a miscarriage last year and had previous uterine surgery for fibroids. My boyfriend said he's through and I'm lost😢. At this point I'm done chasing. If he doesn't change his mind, I have to head to a sperm bank. Thank you for the encouragement 😊

[@africasanchez3543]

How do you froze your eggs? I’m turning 35 next month and I’m convincing myself that I’m not gonna find a husband to spend the rest of my life. I’ve been thinking of having a baby on my own but I’m not ready at this moment.

[@mslucy7230]

Same here soon I'll be 35 I wanna be a mom but I am not financially ready and probably I will never be 100% I dont what to do.I also dont have my moms support. But my heart is asking for baby soon. 😥

[@SummerLovret]

Freezing your eggs is the first half of IVF, you take injections to make your ovaries produce lots of eggs, then they extract the eggs (small surgical procedure) and freeze them for future use. It's very common at this point. You need to find a reproductive medicine clinic to help you with this. It's a GREAT way to buy yourself some time until you're ready. :)

[@SummerLovret]

@@mslucy7230 Oh sweetie! I GET THAT ...so so much. If you can afford to freeze your eggs, I highly recommend it. It's one of the things alot of choice moms wish they had done. It gives you a little insurance policy and buys you some time so you can have kids when you're ready...though nobody is ever 100% ready. Best wishes!! Big hugs :)

[@shesagoddess3592]

Thank you for the honesty in this video. SMC community sounds amazing - I need to find one in the U.K. I’m type A and traditional also. All the same issues, fears and anxieties you felt is where I’m at. I’ve been seeing a guy during covid. Really lovely guy but mentally still a teenager. He wants children so agreed to have a child with me but now I’m faced with the fact he wants to be part of the child’s life. As much as I welcome the support - I don’t want my child to be influenced by his teenage attitudes to non-growth, weed, video games and no career. So I’m trying to develop him into what I see is a man/father. He has a child already all his incentive to grow up isn’t held within children. It’s within his love For a woman. I would rather be a SMC and not have to consider developing him. But then I also feel bad that he’s left out. He adores me but mentality doesn’t excite me or want the same growth as I do. I feel blessed to be pregnant but really struggling with the choice of father and his emotions for me.

[@z7z766]

I'm sorry but this sound very awful and dangerous. Please if are considering to be SMBY, have it the normal way, go to the nearest sperms bank and choose your donor, let your child be your child only otherwise you will regrat it later. Put your unnecessary sympthy to wards the guy aside and think carefully. A lot of women make bad choices because they "feel bad" for men. That's just being a pick me.

[@sannatiisanoja2110]

Love this video!

[@SummerLovret]

Thank you! I hope you found it helpful :)

[@cloversail7855]

Thank you 💕

[@begee5847]

Very helpful ❤️

[@tanvigawde1612]

First of all, you are beautiful!! You are so funny!! I’m so happy for you!! Your children are so blessed to have you as their mommy!! I so want to be a mommy! I’m contemplating it at 35. I have a question- can I get pregnant if I have never had sex but want to consider in home insemination or IUI/ IVF?

[@z7z766]

Yes you can get pregnant and I advice to choose ivf so I can sex selection and have daughters

[@Iqbal85861]

Soo beautiful 😍 story

[@ChristieLynnFogelstrom]

Hi summer. Do you have an outlet I can reach out to you privately ? I’d love to get your advice on becoming a choice mom.. thanks so much.

[@SummerLovret]

you can email me at [e-mail] I'm sorry for the delayed response...I don't have a ton of free time, but this topic is really important to me and I would love to hear from you

[@jones2277]

my two biggest hurdles are the cost of childcare and the fear that the child will resent not having a father.

[@Ilikefrogs..]

I feel like kids think whatever they and their friends are doing is normal. As long as they have other friends around who are also the children of single parents, they probably won't think about it. As long as you're open about it, your children will be completely fine. My daughter asked a few questions when she was three or four. She was sad because her friends had fathers and she didn't. We talked, we hugged, we cried and then everything was fine. I ended up switching her to a better school the next year, where most of the parents are single, and she has been completely fine since. I try to check in with her about it once every year or two, and every time since that first conversation she's been completely fine.

[@z7z766]

@@Ilikefrogs.. when she grow up and learn male nature she will thank you a lot of being wise.

[@sharondrucker6031]

This is something I’m thinking of doing it’s scary but I’d like to be a mom. We’re clinics opened to helping a single women?

[@SummerLovret]

Absolutely! In the US there are no barriers to single women at cryobanks (sperm banks) or fertility clinics. It's a wonderful life, if this is the route you choose!

[@janjoy9759]

When you froze you're eggs, how many mature eggs were you able to harvest

[@rainisnotsureaboutthis]

I adore you, and I adore this as a person who is currently in the process of fertility treatments.

[@SummerLovret]

Thank you for the kind words! Let me know how your journey is going! [e-mail]

[@keithhutchins8803]

Run!

[@jesh4149]

Did you use your frozen eggs?

[@SummerLovret]

Yes, I thawed frozen eggs to do IVF

[@jesh4149]

@@SummerLovret I have more follow up questions >.

[@nomsantsoane3984]

You are soo beautiful

[@chelzyhanna]

❤

[@carlosvelasco8502]

Same for yuo satuation mom my have 5 children

[@SummerLovret]

It takes an EXTREMELY strong and courageous woman to raise 5 children!! :)

[@janjoy9759]

How did you feel growing up in single mom by choice home? What were main challenges? Some kids resent their parents...etc....for depriving them of a father...

[@z7z766]

@@janjoy9759 no they don't. That's propaganda

[@mr.hustleakamike2734]

Lol 😂 can’t wait for the next batch of modern women learn this fact to 😂😂as I 27 year old man I love single mom by choice .😂😂no child support 😂. Plus we gotta statistics to upkeep 📈.

[@z7z766]

It's good news and what's better is that most single mom by choice are doing sex selective pregnancy and only having daughters, it's rare for SMBY to want to have a son.

[@BlakJakk]

I guess women will just keep making excuses to defy men

[@IzzyInTheCity]

get a life and stop seeking attention

[@BlakJakk]

@@IzzyInTheCity get a man trick

[@IzzyInTheCity]

@@BlakJakk I have one but judging by your content, you struggle in that department lmao!!!! Leave women alone, loser.

[@cakesinthecity]

Bye byeee

[@mariasimone4141]

Men defy themselves everyday

[@rusty1121]

Gods order is real goofy woman. I am sure you are figuring it all out now. 40+ years too late. Your kids are in deep peril do to your poor choices in Life. You can make excuses, but its all going to come for you. HARD

[@z7z766]

Lol you feel triggered.