How not to dink a record - A masterclass in bad dinking

It seems I have a bit of a dinking problem.
I guess I’m just not cut out to be a professional dinker. We can’t all live the dinking dream. It’ll no doubt leave a big hole in my life.
Dinker Tools on eBay (affiliated link)
ebay.to/2QQuLt8
Yes, of course ‘I’m doing it wrong', but this is just what happened when I gave it a go.
Perhaps in the right hands these tools are capable of producing perfect results every time, but it seems my hands aren’t the right hands and maybe my old records are just too brittle. However even if they did work perfectly - in my opinion they both take too long and risk damaging the records
Here is a video of a proper dinker • Record Dinking Tool
I've been advised by the nice people on Patreon that the first tool I used is actually something that was designed for punching holes in sheet metal - an example use for this tool was cutting a plug hole in a sink.
I'd like to state that MY DINKING DAYS ARE OVER - I just bought the Dinking tools to follow up the queries about dinking that were posted under the 1949 45s video. I've got no need to dink any more records so I've hung up my Dinkers to spend more time with my family.
MERCH!
Overpriced Techmoan Merchandise link below - order now to get these delivered too late for Christmas
teespring.com/stores/techmoan...
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Over Time - Vibe Tracks • Over Time - Vibe Track...
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ThatSFXGuy - • Six Million Dollar man...
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All links are Affiliated where possible.
When you click on links to various merchants posted here and make a purchase, this can result in me earning a commission. Affiliate programs and affiliations include, but are not limited to, the eBay Partner Network & Amazon.
I am a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to AMAZON Sites (including, but not limited to Amazon US/UK/DE/ES/FR/NL/IT/CAN)
FAQs
Q) Why the background music
A) Unfortunately the microphone was picking up some unpleasant asthmatic wheezing whenever I wasn’t speaking - so in editing I muted the audio in these sections. Unfortunately this made the video sound odd every time the sound cut out entirely. So I added background music off an old BGM system to cover up the abrupt audio level changes. It was either this - or delete the whole video and forget about it.
Q) Why does the BGM continue over the end credits
A) Total ineptitude
Q) Why didn’t/don’t you (insert suggestion here)
A) See section above where I mentioned how I’ll never need or want to dink another record. I only bought these dinking tools to do a video about dinking. I don’t generally play singles - other than these fifty scratched up 45s I bought via ebay for £10, I haven’t got any I’ve bought for listening to for pleasure.
Q) Did you know the rubber bits come off that vice
A) I didn’t, but I do now
PFAQ (Predicted FAQ)
Q) Why is there a picture of a cheese sandwich on screen at the beginning?
A) A while ago on Patreon I coined the phrase ‘A cheese sandwich video’ to describe a simple video that’s exactly what it is and nothing more - just like a cheese sandwich is a sandwich containing cheese.
A cheese sandwich video is simpler video that doesn’t take weeks to assemble. It’s usually a brief demonstration of one item.
If you see a cheese sandwich image pop up at the start of a video - it's a sign to expect a less complicated and elaborate video. Sometimes all a product needs (or deserves) is a simple demonstration - and that’s where the ‘cheese sandwich‘ video comes in.

[@Techmoan]

*Copy & Paste of Video Description Text Box - Expand this text box to read the whole thing* It seems I have a bit of a dinking problem. I guess I’m just not cut out to be a professional dinker. We can’t all live the dinking dream. It’ll no doubt leave a big hole in my life. Dinker Tools on eBay (affiliated link) ebay.to/2QQuLt8 Yes, of course 'I’m doing it wrong', but this is just what happened when I gave it a go. Perhaps in the right hands these tools are capable of producing perfect results every time, but it seems my hands aren’t the right hands and maybe my old records are just too brittle. However even if they did work perfectly - _in my opinion_ they both take too long and risk damaging the records *Here is a video of a proper dinker **kzbin.info/www/bejne/gpyuh2l-bLRngNE* I've been advised by the nice people on Patreon that the first tool I used is actually something that was designed for punching holes in sheet metal - an example use for this tool was cutting a plug hole in a sink. ********************************************************************************* I'd like to state that *MY DINKING DAYS ARE OVER* - I just bought the Dinking tools to follow up the queries about dinking that were posted under the 1949 45s video. I've got no need to dink any more records so I've hung up my Dinkers to spend more time with my family. ********************************************************************************* MERCH! Overpriced Techmoan Merchandise link below - order now to get these delivered too late for Christmas teespring.com/stores/techmoan-merch --------------- SUBSCRIBE ------------------ kzbin.info ------------- SUPPORT --------------- This channel can be supported through Patreon www.patreon.com/techmoan *******Patrons usually have early access to videos******* ---------- Outro Music ----------- Over Time - Vibe Tracks kzbin.info/www/bejne/jIS2pKqMj7iagNk ------ Outro Sound Effect ------ ThatSFXGuy - kzbin.info/www/bejne/a36WXo2MapKEeq8 ------ AFFILIATED LINKS/ADVERTISING NOTICE ------- All links are Affiliated where possible. When you click on links to various merchants posted here and make a purchase, this can result in me earning a commission. Affiliate programs and affiliations include, but are not limited to, the eBay Partner Network & Amazon. I am a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to AMAZON Sites (including, but not limited to Amazon US/UK/DE/ES/FR/NL/IT/CAN) FAQs Q) Why the background music A) Unfortunately the microphone was picking up some unpleasant asthmatic wheezing whenever I wasn’t speaking - so in editing I muted the audio in these sections. Unfortunately this made the video sound odd every time the sound cut out entirely. So I added background music off an old BGM system to cover up the abrupt audio level changes. It was either this - or delete the whole video and forget about it. Q) Why does the BGM continue over the end credits A) Total ineptitude Q) Why didn’t/don’t you (insert suggestion here) A) See section above where I mentioned how I’ll never need or want to dink another record. I only bought these dinking tools to do a video about dinking. I don’t generally play singles - other than these fifty scratched up 45s I bought via ebay for £10, I haven’t got any I’ve bought for listening to for pleasure. Q) Did you know the rubber bits come off that vice A) I didn’t, but I do now PFAQ (Predicted FAQ) Q) Why is there a picture of a cheese sandwich on screen at the beginning? A) A while ago on Patreon I coined the phrase ‘A cheese sandwich video’ to describe a simple video that’s exactly what it is and nothing more - just like a cheese sandwich is a sandwich containing cheese. A cheese sandwich video is simpler video that doesn’t take weeks to assemble. It’s usually a brief demonstration of one item. If you see a cheese sandwich image pop up at the start of a video - it's a sign to expect a less complicated and elaborate video. Sometimes all a product needs (or deserves) is a simple demonstration - and that’s where the ‘cheese sandwich‘ video comes in.

[@rrp6405]

@@johnritter9627 kzbin.info/www/bejne/pp2XoZ-GfLd6btE

[@yolomeme7857]

The first tool is normally used to cut through thin sheet metal.

[@JackMoney]

and the rubber jaws on the vise are removable by sliding them up.

[@garbleduser]

@techmoan Hey, What is that data signal noise on the audio at the end of every video you make?

[@plushifoxed]

What's the background filler music you've used? Weird to hear filler music in your videos at all, but not unwelcome!

[@shipguy55]

All records were harmed in the making of this video.

[@CarlosGarcia-ze6rt]

No records were (properly) dinked in the making of this video

[@msmeyersmd8]

Damn. That is a seriously funny comment. LOL. And that’s rare for me. Oh, the humanity. I didn’t watch to see if it was in the scrolling comments at end of the video.

[@mb-ql1gb]

But at least, no animals have been injured by this movie ... ^^

[@BoB4jjjjs]

Nothing was done properly in the making of this video!

[@thebiggerbyte5991]

Vinyl fans: Don't touch the grooves! Techmoan: Brings out sand-paper and a brick ;)

[@alexsicko]

Vinyl fans: Don't touch the grooves! Turntablists: ok bro. The End. Of the world

[@bobbywright6062]

π-ШТО as we know it....

[@lubodega1638]

It reminds me of Steve Wallis's 'bushcrafting' with lighter fluid and chainsaws. 😂

[@thiswan1]

New Block On The kids

[@timesthree5757]

Vinyl fans pass out.

[@vsevkrawczeniuk8019]

"Tastes like product placement" was the classiest way ever to promote your merchandise. Well done sir.

[@750kv8]

Couldn't *not* notice the mug.

[@ViewtifulSam]

2:24 man, Mat is remarkably good at imitating the muppet's voice!

[@electronash]

Next week: "I've only gone and bought myself a laser cutter."

[@artcraft2893]

Or olfa circle cutter

[@8bitwiz_]

Then he can make another follow-up video where he dinks a CD. It's too bad that laserdiscs come pre-dinked, maybe he could try a CED instead?

[@frtard]

Very expensive

[@SlavTiger]

I've gone and bought a chainsaw and a bottle of WD-40

[@evensgrey]

@@artcraft2893 Which is the basic design of the second type of hole cutter, but a rather crude, non-adjustable and very overpriced form.

[@ShuAum]

2:21 "oh no, he's holding the record by the grooves". Techmoan became the puppets for a second. Love it.

[@TheKiruNias]

"Laura Branigan - Self Control" "Not a valuable record" Ouch. That hurt.

[@tomfreerunner4lyf]

Glad I wasn't the only one who thought so. Lol

[@davidbjork5063]

Yes same here 😢

[@commandtheline]

Now I want to play Vice City...

[@timfischer]

Definitely my favorite song of those included.

[@zetametallic]

That is a really good record. The surface of that record didnt look bad either...shame.

[@TheYear-dm9op]

These infernal tools must have been made either by vinyl enthusiasts without any knowledge of engineering or by engineers without any knowledge of vinyl records.

[@hsimpson7267]

They are existing tools for other purposes

[@companionsytoriginal873]

So basically dumb morons.

[@web1bastler]

That first "Dinker" looks exactly like a electrical panel hole punch. That's why the bolt is too large.

[@BogusNotions]

Known as a Q Max cutter - great for sheet metal, not so good for plastic.

[@CaillouLP]

Yeah, it's definitely not made for dinking. Pretty much a scam.

[@williamjones4483]

i thought so too. Greenlee chassis punch. This looks alarmingly like one of those. I hope Techmoan didn't get ripped off.

[@snik2pl]

Exacly what I was going to write

[@cirebyte7588]

Yes, that's right, i thought i had seen one before!

[@spytromics]

That's a great sales pitch: "Don't send your records to me. I will ruin them." Just write up a business plan, and watch the cash flow in! Thanks. That was a fun video.

[@MrDuncl]

Just don't get Techmoan to make your video for a Kickstarter project.

[@ditroia2777]

I remember seeing some 7” singles in Australia [Which used the small hole], that had a cut out in them. So you could just press and snap out the centre.

[@MikhelBL]

Yup, same here in México.

[@somerandomgoogleuser3374]

Yea, I've got some way down under here in "Noo Zee land" aka New Zealand....

[@JtagSheep]

Same here in the UK a bunch of the old 78s started to ship with dinked holes already but had an insert with them to clip in and play on a regular TT.

[@mt-mg7tt]

Me too, on a variety of 45's. I'm in Australia but I'm sure it'd be done in the US too.

[@Vinyl_guy]

All of my uk import singles from the 60s have those

[@davida1hiwaaynet]

Very interesting! I can answer your question about the size of the bolt in the first dinking tool. That tool is actually a very cheap version "conduit knockout punch" designed for making holes in the sheet-metal enclosures of electrical circuit breaker boxes or other electrical boxes. The bolt is strong enough to pull the knockout tool through steel, so it was engineered for that level of force. Look up greenlee knockout punch and you can see these in all sizes. The better ones have a ball bearing to assist with the ease of operation. We use the same stepped-drill bit as you have, for making the initial hole.

[@seitenryu6844]

This was my first thought as soon as he showed the tool. Great for malleable materials like steel, not so much for brittle plastic.

[@JulianSortland]

Was going to say the same. The I borrowed to do 2 holes didn't have the a bearing, but a drop of oil between the Allen key head and the washer made it so much easier to turn. A tool which rotates and cuts the material is a far better idea.

[@lupercal78]

"Techmoan plays with his dinker" is a totally missed opportunity for a video title.

[@Rutherford_Inchworm_III]

"Techmoan experiments with two different dinkers but is left unsatisfied by both."

[@murrfeeling]

Tight holes reamed out by dinkers (amateur)

[@richardmattocks]

The best part about this video is imagining the vinyl fans going apoplectic as you put it down on wood, sanded it, missed the middle etc and everything else. But for me... awesome video! I was literally in hysterics crying as I watched 😂😂

[@richardmattocks]

Zipplet I know! 😁😁

[@MattMcIrvin]

@@ZippletTech The plural of vinyl fan is vinyl fan

[@joshuascholar3220]

He _warned_ them.

[@djzoloft]

I hate you!

[@kirkc9643]

It looked like a vinyl horror movie

[@I-Libertine]

Secret: in America, we actually add in the plastic bits you blokes are trying to remove! We've all been duped!

[@patrickdevitt1789]

Some of mine have the push out spiders in the middle. From England.

[@WR3ND]

I think we got the better deal with that often included adapter we drop in on standard turntables though.

[@patrickdevitt1789]

@@WR3ND I had that too. It came with a national Panasonic stereo outfit.

[@WR3ND]

Sure, I was just speaking in general terms regarding what David said, having the hole filled to size being easier than needing to cut a bigger one out. Cheers.

[@patrickdevitt1789]

@@WR3ND 👍

[@alhazan]

In Australia to "dink" is to give someone a ride on the front of your bicycle :) I don't know what we call destroying records though.

[@Christopher-N]

In the U.S., a dink is one of the little people who follows Yogurt on the desert moon of Vega. _"Merchandising! Merchandising! Where the real money from the movie is made."_

[@gwishart]

According to the OED, it's also slang for a penis. But that seems to be case for every third noun in the OED, lexicographers have filthy minds.

[@WildBluntHickok]

@@gwishart Dink is the kind of penis word that you'd expect a kid to say. Same thing with weiner. Some words for it I just can't take seriously when an adult says it.

[@georgemaragos2378]

@@Christopher-N Space balls the flame thrower - the kids really like this one

[@astrosci8864]

Progress?

[@ChrisBigBad]

New Kids on the Chopping Block... :D Excellent humor! If the black one had a smaller screw and handle or grip on both sides, it might actually work. For the silver one, maybe put two holes through the label and use them to peg the record down.

[@grahameida7163]

Chris BigBad I think it just looks like a standard off the shelf hole cutter in the correct size, being sold as designed for a record, as there original use is for sheet metal as well you need the larger bolt to take the strain.

[@kiltymacbagpipe]

I read, “drink a record” and saw the sandwich and figured I was in for a food episode.

[@caitthenerd7470]

When the weather is cold, and the nights are drawing in, there's nothing better than a nice hot mug of melted vinyl!

[@donisan969]

@@caitthenerd7470 You did my day

[@johnlovesbridge]

You mauled that Laura Branigan record. I'm a tad miffed.

[@StCerberusEngel]

Not as miffed as my coworker, Gloria, who I made a habit of poking fun of with lyrics to a different song.

[@bobbobson4069]

I love techmoan videos - especially (but not only) for his engaging and friendly personality! Great documentary series! I also appreciate the technical quality of the video and editing.

[@Vamptonius]

My Mum watched this with me. She knew going in the records would be of no loss whatsoever and it still made her squeamish. She used to run a record shop, you see. "There's just some things you don't do to vinyl." She said. And, "but we've seen him doing things that can't be unseen." I've sat her down with a nice hot cup of tea to get over it.

[@Vamptonius]

@@asbestosfibers1325 So should we all be.

[@Rebel9668]

Good thing she didn't see us using them as frisbee's back in the 90's then, lol.

[@jacksons1010]

@@asbestosfibers1325 Oh, my...have we gone from good-natured ribbing to unwarranted personal commentary? I don't know that there's ever a place for a comment like that, but this certainly isn't it.

[@Vamptonius]

@@asbestosfibers1325 Eh?

[@jacksons1010]

@@asbestosfibers1325 It's not your place to be telling other people how to live their lives, sir, and if you mistake your rude behavior for "strength"...not much hope for you then, is there?

[@ChadWSmith]

"Dinkin' Ain't Easy" - Techmoan 2019 It's hard out there for a dink.

[@Mrpurple75]

Dinkin’ ain’t easy, but it’s necessary

[@sparkstron73]

@@Riskteven Have you a link to the vid?

[@sparkstron73]

@@Riskteven ok found them. There is another record roulette bunch of vids where they go crate digging and make a new track from sampling old records. I thought it was a pun on the phrase "spinning" and some dj was just loading up a tumble driver with a bunch of records to "mix" them.

[@frankschneider6156]

@@Riskteven The moment music of the backstreet boys becomes "valuable", is the moment mankind should seriously consider mass-suicide as civilization has obviously already ceased to exist.

[@TheCornouiller]

@@Riskteven He ran out of records?

[@LaskyLabs]

I love imagining someone out there watching you do this and cringing hard. It's a comforting thought.

[@iridium130m]

that new kids on the block record sure was hangin' tough.

[@VidweII]

Oy, what'd you do today? Well I watched a middle-aged British chap dink New Kids On The Block. Wot? In the end, he said it was too tight.

[@oorcinus]

“They’d come back with the holes missing in the middle” had me chuckling like an idiot for good 5 minutes.

[@lightningdemolition1964]

Actually the hole wouldn't be missing. The center of the record would be missing. Well maybe the small hole that used to be there would be gone but then... nevermind.

[@hjalfi]

I appreciate living in a world where bags of doughnut holes are a real thing.

[@brendancarlson1678]

I'd like to buy a box of holes.📦

[@quantumleap359]

@@brendancarlson1678 You could find out how many of them are in Albert Hall. Maybe....

[@robbybobbyhobbies]

Quantum Leap deserves more likes.

[@KennethDPedersen]

I'm pretty sure I have that Laura Branigan Self Control single somewhere handy. I mean it's not Gloria but still, Love!

[@msthalamus2172]

I like that you show your mistakes as well. A lot of KZbin channels only show things that work flawlessly.

[@Landrew0]

He's simply reselling an electrician's hole-cutter. The hole in the record is too small, hence the drill bit.

[@harrkev]

The technical term is "Knockout punch."

[@paulyh4531]

Just get an Arbor job done 😂🍺😉

[@PsalmFourteenOne]

I came here to post your same comment. Yup. Someone sold him a tool to make a knockout for electrical conduit connectors. I've used that exact tool. Ha ha.

[@younhitchborn]

Funny, I was going to say I have that exact same conduit punch. Came in a set with three otherr sizes.

[@Radfordperson]

Favourite brand was Q-Max. Q-Max punch.

[@jq747]

"Where were you thinking of putting the rabbits?" "In the vice, Father"

[@CaesarBest]

That's funny, is that from a movie or something?

[@gwishart]

@@CaesarBest It's from the television programme "Father Ted", specifically episode six of the second series: "The Plague".

[@CaesarBest]

@@gwishart Oh cheers

[@nealefrancis3995]

great video as ever - from memory the first dink tool really meant for cutting holes in sheet metal from my apprenticeship days .

[@daveayerstdavies]

When using the second type of cutter, cut half depth then turn over and cut from the other side. You will get a massively better result.

[@dextrodemon]

I think usually you don't even go through the whole way, just score both sides deeply and pop the center out.

[@GrandDawggy]

I think every person should study engineering or manufacturing it really changes the way you think about things

[@TonboIV]

More like a marginally less terrible result.

[@edwardwood6532]

I had the same thought. But if you have seen any of his other videos, he isn't a klutz.

[@animefreak5757]

part of the problem is the cutters only on one side, making it very hard to keep the tool vertical, it keeps wanting to cant off to one side

[@is0p0d]

Seeing him do the puppet voice in front of the camera jarred me so hard at first

[@LarryTalbot_1313]

I thought "Dink" was the name of that puppet!

[@epicoxtra3739]

@@LarryTalbot_1313 Dink Moan?

[@LarryTalbot_1313]

@@epicoxtra3739. Exactly!

[@epicoxtra3739]

@@LarryTalbot_1313 works for me :)

[@SurajGrewal]

Looks like someone picked up an electrician's tool , found it to be the right size for the job and sold it as a dinker for record

[@DrKlausTrophobie]

And put quite a price on that idea....

[@mattlovell4213]

Yea the first one is a knockout, used them many times putting up panels

[@evensgrey]

@@DrKlausTrophobie McMaster-Carr has a number of models at about that price, not clear which one it is so kind of hard to say for sure.

[@didgitalpunk]

Good quality knockout tools are pricey already though

[@02R96]

Sometimes called a chassis punch...

[@DrTofu83]

I love your videos and I'm going through all of them :P As for the reason the first dinking tool has a shaft larger than the average disc hole I've got the answer: is a repurposed sheet metal hole puncher, made to slot in your average pre-drilled holes

[@exiles_dot_tv]

I thought cutting holes in records sounded like a bad idea, but it turns out to be far worse than I'd even imagined.

[@kbhasi]

I won't be surprised if I wasn't the only one to initially misread the title as "How not to drink a record". 0:02 Cheese sandwich mode… here we go…

[@imploud]

oh yeah :D

[@dan_loup]

that's more of a nilered thing.

[@philfen2972]

Laura Branigan, self control, brings back fond memories from my youth 🤩🤩🤩

[@martinkarlsson1456]

Sandpaper and records are two things I wouldn't want to combine ever:P

[@ostar22]

Actually a record exists that comes in a sandpaper sleeve! I think it was a Durutti Column album.

[@alex0711a]

People in the UK with an antique Wurlitzer who only have 45s with the small hole. Finally you focus on the everyday problem of the masses lol.

[@GURken]

People in the former USSR have the same problem. So technically Techmoan solves international problems!

[@realspyfrog]

No, we had the small holes where I live also

[@mikek5633]

First world problems. LOL

[@RCAvhstape]

@@GURken In Soviet Russia, records dink you

[@OrinSorinson]

@@RCAvhstape That's what happens when you play frisbee with them and you catch it with your face.

[@trailersic]

Remember everyone at this time of year don't Dink and Dive

[@ewmegoolies]

his Vice made of rubber, So is his condoms made of foil?

[@quantumleap359]

@@ewmegoolies Vise

[@macswanton9622]

And don't let a fiend dive dunk

[@donaloflynn]

Don't dink and dive at any time of year! As for drink driving (because there's an r in the month!), perhaps a little drink might have steadied Mat's hands a bit. There were no screwdrivers in this video so he wouldn't haven fallen foul of the law.

[@trailersic]

@@quantumleap359 Vice

[@MrMakeDo]

Your videos are always entertaining!

[@joshuaneel9639]

Here since 120k i cant wait till 1 million. You are ny hero.

[@MrNeptunebob]

I see the Laura Branigan self control record. I remember my father getting upset about the video, saying "people don't smile much in these videos, do they"?

[@AlejandroFerrariMc]

"Let's dink New Kids on the Block"

[@Not-Great-at-Gaming]

I'd rather dink the Spice Girls.

[@PissBoys]

Let’s not and say we did.

[@frankschneider6156]

@@Not-Great-at-Gaming The Spice girls ? They must all be around 60 by now ... brrrr

[@CraigBickerstaff]

@@frankschneider6156 They're in their 40s actually, Bunton is 43

[@xir1111011]

...interpol will be to your residence momentarily.

[@TechnologistAtWork]

I got the bone induction headset you reviewed. absolutely amazing and useful for my work environment.

[@benedictnothing]

Ha! Great stuff. I've got one of thise Stanley vices. The rubber covers just pop straight off to reveal metal grips.

[@astrosci8864]

"Let's dink New Kids on the Block." "Oh, it's too tight!" The members of your fanclub have dirty minds and plenty of room for innuendo.

[@deusexaethera]

Which endo, exactly?

[@MichaelBerthelsen]

❤👍😁

[@daanwilmer]

I've been desensitized by Scholagladiatoria's content. He's talking about "gripping the butt" for "better penetration". Context (which is also a word he loves): It's the butt of a rifle, which you can grip if you're using the bayonet on it to get to get better penetration into an enemy and cause more damage and making them stop trying to fight you.

[@greenaum]

Nah by the time they got to be a successful boy band too tight wouldn't be anything to worry about. They'll have had arses like old windsocks.

[@astrosci8864]

@@greenaum We didn't have to go there, did we?

[@TWX1138]

When I first read the video title, I thought, "It's finally happened, he's gone mad!"

[@michaeldixon6545]

Actually, the first one looks exactly like what I got from IKEA for cutting a hole in a stainless steel sink for fitting a tap

[@crazyg74]

yes! I'd bet that's exactly what it is.

[@SuperWhoremuffin]

It's just a traditional knock out, available in any size you want

[@Caun-88]

I can easily say this is the best dinking related video I have ever watched.

[@parsil8158]

I misread it as "Drinking Records" I was very very confused

[@Zadster]

This explains Lard's vinyl collection in Mark & Lard's Classic Cuts on their old Radio 1 show. Mark: Is it rare? Lard: In that condition yeah.

[@shaungreer3350]

I just bought a record that was dinked but it’s now fitted with a clip to make it fit a standard record player with no 45 adapter. nice video!

[@llary]

I work in a pressing plant, we have a small electric flywheel press for dinking 7". It's fun dinking everything in sight.

[@dazzlingd]

Missed opportunity to not test this on an Engelbert Humperdink 45. I’ll get my coat...

[@Charlesb88]

Please release me and let me live again...after that awful joke.😒

[@herosstratos]

It wouldn't work out for a dinking test, even a good dink would sound awfully.

[@williamjones4483]

Englebert Humperdinker?

[@mspeter97]

@@williamjones4483 A singer

[@frankschneider6156]

Elton John is still alive, he might even enjoy being dinked.

[@carlosXromano]

I cannot be the only one who has realized that he is showing us his Hewlett Packard-01 watch now in silver. A wonderful piece of engineering even more gorgeous in silver. Nice trickery.

[@isaacbell2426]

I simply use a hole cutter on a cordless drill. Comes out perfect 👌

[@tkienzle22]

This video made me laugh so hard. Your awesome keep up the great videos love them. TK in the USA

[@a500]

Always nice to have a dink with my cheese sandwich.

[@demogorgonzola]

Reported for cruelty to vinyl record. ;-) BTW Today's motto is Duke NUkem's: "I'll rip you a new one!"

[@mikequinlan9585]

That was so much fun to watch!

[@MrWombatty]

Here in Australia, the record-industry simply made singles with a small hole for a standard record-player, but they also had a dinking-perforation which enabled the purchaser to easily dink it themselves by pushing out the larger disc for playing in a juke-box!

[@kenneychappuis1853]

The first dinker is fashioned after a electrician’s knockout punch.

[@HotelPapa100]

Not fashioned after. It is one, re-branded. That's why the bolt is too large.

[@killakobra]

was going to say this.

[@kenneychappuis1853]

HotelPapa100 The cinching down bolt is to small, that would break going through a gutter box. Other than that it’s identical

[@HotelPapa100]

@@kenneychappuis1853 Take a decent tempered bolt and it will work. An M6, which will go through the standard bore, in 12.9 holds (and pulls) a ton.

[@kvfive]

“Let me grab some sandpaper” - lol :-)

[@chrisperry7963]

This was insanely entertaining! But I would say that seeing how this can go wrong was quite valuable...

[@lyricalgateway2193]

Now I know theres a thing called dinking. That goes into my "Things I Bet You Didnt Know" conversation file. Great video. Thanks!

[@sparkspl]

"Dinkin' Ain't Easy", 1940s blues LP by Techmoan

[@steelscooter]

The first tool is a pre-existing device for making neat holes in metal, hence the too big bolt. I would use a hole saw on a drill to be honest. It would be much quicker too. 🙂👍

[@alexatkin]

I was going to disagree due to the mess, but as it seems neither of those existing devices are remotely designed for the job either, a hole saw bit is certainly no worse. Anything purpose designed I'd expect to simply punch the record without leaving any random bits of vinyl lying around.

[@andrester88]

@@alexatkin I would be more concerned about the records cracking and splitting when using a hole saw.

[@SegaDream131]

Hole saws are messy and leave jagged edges..... If he used the tool correctly he would have had far better results.... Oil your punches......

[@brian.willett]

Pull the t-handle off that second one, list it into the chuck and use it as the "hole saw"

[@Shaun.Stephens]

@@SegaDream131 The problem wasn't with the punch, it was with the use of the stepped drill to enlarge the hole. That goes off-centre and so does the punch.

[@jameshodgson1609]

Self isolating and have just found this channel really enjoying it. I seem to remember on some early 45s there was a centre that was removable and was often falling out or am I imagining this. The devices you have tested appear very crude and am not surprised you found them difficult to use. The other ones on KZbin looked brutal as well. A fly cutter on a pillar drill or the record fixed to the face plate of a lathe would work but you would have to think of some way to clamp the outer bit of the label to support the record once you had cut through.

[@Colt45hatchback]

You have far more patience than me. Id have gotten frustrated and used the drill in combination with those dinkers. I commend your ability to try :)

[@fortherecord1569]

"I Dink Alone" - George Thorogood

[@danmackintosh6325]

Certainly a Destroyer of vinyl, these tools...

[@LOTPOR0402]

@@asbestosfibers1325 Each to there own

[@MarkTheMorose]

"You'll Never Dink Alone" - Liverpool FC fans.

[@RobCamp-rmc_0]

After this hack job, gonna need one bourbon, one scotch, and one beer

[@danmackintosh6325]

@@asbestosfibers1325 Well you're entitled to your opinion, but you sure as hell weren't picking up what i was laying down with that comment...

[@g-r-a-e-m-e-]

"It's My Party", by Dave Stewart and Barbara Gaskin, is a great record. I have a 12 inch version somewhere.

[@Shaun.Stephens]

Yeah when I saw that I must admit I thought it was a shame.

[@Cinnimin]

this is one of the most enjoyable videos

[@christhetuner]

The first Tool i know is normally used to cut a hole in a kitchen sink for the faucet. Got a few of those in many sizes. Fun to see this tool i can get at the hardware store misused :D

[@axelvetter]

We need a sticker now "Home dinking is killing music"

[@quidem]

"If you want your records "dinking" don't ask me to do it." So funny.

[@markdm5415]

I did not know what this video was when I clicked on "DInking" , happy to see it was yours . The first dinker is just a hole saw, nothing fancy quite common. I used to use them to put holes in homemade project boxes with plasitc or Aluminum boxes as cabines. The second one you need A block of wood with a hole that the dinker fits down snugly into and you need to work from BOTH sides of the record. Maybe you should just quit dinking? You make so many other things look so easy when I know they are not.

[@mergenbeen]

Ohw my god, got goosebumps on my back when you where doing this 😂🤣😂

[@SilverEagleDev]

"Dinking ain't easy" but it's necessary so I'm dinkin' records...and results are scary

[@johncrowerdoe5527]

For the second tool, there are two obvious but similar tools: 1. Replace the stone brick by a soft rubber brick by Bad Dragon. Apparently no longer manufactured but that hasn't stopped you in the past. 2. Replace that unbalanced adjustable device by a symmetrical flat wood cutting drill of correct size. Cheaply available in hardware stores, may need adding something to increase the center girth.

[@Immopimmo]

I don't own a single physical audio format player, nor do I have any tapes or records. Still, I can't help but to love these kind of videos. 😁👍

[@dangerousmythbuster]

I initially read the title as "How not to drink a record."

[@Bkoded]

dangerousmythbuster glad I’m not the only one

[@RetroSteveUK]

Yep, same here. 😆

[@MrYTGuy1]

Funny enough when I was a kid I remember hearing all the teenage girls talking about how they wanted to 'dink' the new kids on the block.

[@greenaum]

Aw man, i didn't. I just had my sister, who was in love with them, playing them over and OVER and _OVER_ and *over!* Every morning during school holidays and weekends bloody waking me up. And as a result i could sing along to any of their songs at a second's notice perfectly. Not a skill that has added any value to my life so far.

[@WildBluntHickok]

​@@greenaum Maybe you're fated to achieve youtube fame doing death metal covers of their songs. ...wait is there someone who already has that niche covered?

[@CEddyAV19]

I had no idea so many young women in the 80s got into vinyl records and cutting them correctly in order to play them on their American jukeboxes.

[@kriswingert1662]

I use a door knob hole cutter for my drill. Works great!

[@TheAussieRepairGuy]

"I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced. I fear something terrible has happened."

[@umann1557]

One of those voices was mine... True, I was screaming at my screen a collection of words that were understandably not to be used in civilized society. In fact my cats and dogs must have left the area sadly. When I gave it the o'le 👎.. Well I felt better and started to read and 👍 the comments.. First it was a chuckle and a snicker that I wasn't alone in my vision of a serial record mutalation person.. As I kept reading laughing escalated into uncontrollable fits of uproarious gales of laughter with loss of vision and breath.. I have not honestly laughed that hard or that long in over 30 years.. It was so good I subscribed just to see another test like this and relish the reading of comments and replys.. I have no shame..obviously 😂

[@geronimoletsplays]

I just wanted to thank you for a good laugh! Such a refreshing change from all the “right watch me show you how an expert does it” type show me videos. Watching your comedy of errors of how not to do it was hysterical. I think the best bet is probably not to bother at all. Play any records only on players with a matching size spindle. Cheers, Ian

[@johncrowerdoe5527]

Only for the dinking conversion. Putting a big hole record on a small spindle just needs a smooth Bakelite or plastic adapter that you drop on the spindle first.

[@jaecenwhite2590]

The bolt doesn’t fit through the spindle hole because it’s just an off the shelf chassis punch meant for punching sheet metal.

[@greenaum]

That explains a lot, the robbing bastards!

[@8bitwiz_]

And it might have worked too, if it weren't for those meddling ki... er, I mean, if he had taken a moment to find a snugly fitting drill bit instead of a stepped bit from China.

[@Bernard-zb5sx]

I think you want a hole saw with a right-sized peg in place of the center drill-bit. Cheers! Thanks for the video.

[@manuschulz1761]

Me: reads title first time, thinking it's "How not to DRINK a record" Also me: rereads and now understands the title Video starts: "Tastes like product placement" Again me: REREADS TITLE FOR 2ND TIME

[@danmackintosh6325]

3:34 because it's not something a guy has made specifically for this purpose. If it was sold as a dinker then most likely he's just bought it and inflated the price to make a quick profit. What you have there my good sir, is a hole punch for sheet metal.

[@vintageyamahasquid]

I clicked on this because I thought it said "How not to DRINK a record."

[@JeremyLevi]

A buddy of mine tried that once, boiling down an old 78 to get the pure alcohol out. It didn't end well. He forgot you're supposed to cut it heavily and just downed the resulting 1/2 ounce of alcohol in one shot. He blacked out and woke up two days later with no memory of what happened, but his apartment was trashed and he was jammed into the 8 inch space between his bed and the wall.

[@vintageyamahasquid]

@@JeremyLevi wait, are you serious?

[@JeremyLevi]

@@vintageyamahasquid I wasn't personally witness, but he's the kind of guy that get's himself into enough weird situations that he doesn't really need to make them up, so I'm inclined to believe it was a more or less factual story, yes.

[@TheCrakkle]

Go to love Ebay. That first one is a standard Sheet metal cutter ! Been around for many years lol That is why it has a large bolt. Second a variant of an adjustable hole cutter. I have over a dozen which I use for making holes in cases and cabinets of various electronic and electrical jobs.. Personally I have in the past, use a standard wood hole saw with the drill replaced by an appropriate diameter bar. Works well.

[@Captain-Nomad]

If only RCA and Columbia could have been more cooperative we clould have had 1 standard one speed, one size, one hole typology!

[@RannoRannikmaa]

the first device is used on electrical junction boxes for making bigger wholes for cables. the second one probably would work better with a cordless drill

[@Mighty_Cat_Mods]

It also looks like something you would use to make a hole in a stainless steel kitchen sink, to install a tap.

[@JackMoney]

and the bolt doesn't fit because it's metric and the centre of a '45 is probably imperial (old english)? I just googled it and it's 9/32" for a 12" and presumably the same for a 7" from the UK. The large 7" holes are ~37mm or 1.46" and can be up to 38.5mm or ~1.5".

[@han5vk]

You mean holes.

[@carpediem4887]

Its called a knockout punch

[@zaugitude]

Yes, cordless drill or even better a drill press.

[@jennysbloke]

7:49 - The sight of you attacking that thing with a piece of sandpaper just cracked me up. I was in stitches. 😀 I wouldn't want to attack any of my vinyl with either of those weapons of mass destruction. 😄 ... As always, brilliantly tongue-in-cheek, Matt. Thanks

[@johnmarsh655]

I used to work as an engineer for a company years ago that did jukeboxes in pubs around Manchester and Liverpool, I think they still do. We used to have to dink hundreds of 7” singles every week for the collectors to update the sites when they visited to empty the cash boxes. We used a dinker very much like the one you first used in the video. Not sure if it had been modified but it fitted through the hole without having to do any drilling. You then placed the dinker on the workbench with the record in place and then whacked the top of the dinker with a lump hammer. The trick was to soften the plastic by running a cigarette lighter flame around the area of the cut. Splitting the record, as you did, was quite common but the boss wouldn’t be happy if you f**ked up too many. The job was normally given to the YTS or tea boy as it really was a tedious job. Brought back happy memories. One Christmas a lady bought an old vinyl jukebox for her husband’s den or ‘man cave’. We gave it a full refurb. She then brought his collection of favourite 7” singles to be dinked and loaded onto the jukebox before we delivered it on Christmas Eve. Not sure if he ever noticed that some of his favourite songs were missing as the dinker had eaten them but I do remember getting a decent tip when we delivered it and then drove away quickly.

[@garethwood3579]

I use the second tool. Alternate between both sides, and keep an 'open middle' record sleeve on for a little protection. It takes time and patience, and some older records are now so brittle you can't win.

[@davidbrider]

7:06 “I wouldn’t want to do this on a valuable record.” So New Kids on the Block is the perfect choice, really...

[@Blackadder75]

but he butchered Laura Branigan :(

[@frankschneider6156]

No the perfect choice for the New Kids on the Block would have been a flamethrower (doesn't matter if applied to the guys themselves or their records, both would be laudable).

[@SenileOtaku]

@@Blackadder75 Didn't care about the Laura Branigan one, but there *was* the Stiff Records single (Dave Stewart & Barbara Gaskin)...