How to actually sit with your feelings

Explore my book, Unstuck for more ways to implement change - www.drcaitlinfa...
Welcome! Are you struggling with your next steps? You’re not alone.
👩‍🏫 I’m Caitlin Faas, Ph.D. As a motivational speaker, I help experts get off the hamster wheel. I earned tenure as a psychology professor and then transitioned to life coaching full-time.
Check out the rest of my videos for practical strategies so you can overcome self-sabotage for good:
✅ / @drcaitlinfaas

[@adilahaz]

I was feeling lonely today, and instead of pushing it away, I acknowledged it by saying "Hi Lonely." I didn't feel as overwhelmed as before. I was able to sit through it and noticed the sensation of discomfort for maybe 30 minutes. Then I said "I honour you. Thank you for giving me this human life experience." It felt easier to let go. Thanks for the reminder.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Amazing, Adilah! So glad you shared this with me.

[@muliczakatalin8247]

Some people are lonely, why is that not OK? It is as normal as being not lonely. To be honest, I feel much better alone if the only other choice is to be surrounded by idiots and functional analfabeths who do not intend to develop their brain. Then I feel lonelier than alone. I understand if someone longs for company and experiences "being alone" as "lonelyness", with other words, as a loss. This is completely OK. However, it's also fine, simply not to experience "being alone" as a loss, but see the added value of the freedom that it brings you by not being owned, possessed, controlled by ones who only long for power and not your company, because they either don't care for your company or they just simply dislike it, or both.

[@jelenamarusic3641]

I like your process. I believe it would work for me too. I am going to try it the next time I feel an uncomfortable emotion. Thank you for sharing that.

[@coppersense999]

If I might interject, and I could be wrong 100%, so I am curious to bounce this idea around in this space. I relate to the comment and the feeling of loneliness, and also the meta-feeling of shame! At that point, while it is super helpful to sit with a feeling all the way through, without fearing it or shaming it, and just know it is a vibration that passes through the body (not forgetting the mind-body-energy link), I think we are missing a key point. Which is that feelings are data points and often point us toward action, often powered by words and communication with other people. Or not. Maybe just takes us to our own inaccurate stories. But it crosses my mind, especially as someone who craves and values and optimizes hopefully solitude as a cherished resource, that a lonely feeling might remind me of my need for connection and belonging and acceptance. If I am holding others in contempt, it is usually shadow work, where I have unfinished rejection and excluded and disliked wounds to heal. Just me. Definitely I am picky about who actually fills my cup. But even with the best people for me, being intentional about communication and boundaries and vulnerable sharing is hard. Good hard though. Like sitting patiently, with positive regard and self-compassion, with hard feelings. Hard feelings, if used to investigate curiously, can lead to hard decisions and transformative change. Which kicks things off again, because face it change kinda sucks. Or feels like it does. Until it doesn't lol

[@shadyworld1]

How are you doing right now 2 years later? Did that help?

[@trantuean1916]

this is the most fundamental skill that everyone should be taught. Think of how many mental problems we can solve if we know how to face our feelings .

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Yes! It's rippling throughout the world right now and many children are being taught these skills!

[@kassedina]

"A feeling is just a vibration moving through the body" helps me to feel a positive sense of separation from the emotion, and helps me to better identify where the emotion is. Lovely. Thanks :)

[@drcaitlinfaas]

So glad you found it helpful, Kassedina!

[@peaceofmindofpeace1650]

Yes and it helps me to not identity to much with my negative emotions ( doesn't mean I'm a negative person) As they say ' we are not our emotions'. .

[@chillieboi2145]

I learnt to bury my emotions after I lost my son 19 years ago I was terrified of my emotions so I buried them only to end up in therapy where I've had to open a huge wound , the pain in my heart still exists so I cried my eyes out , then I realised I had nothing to be afraid of because I was safe. Amazing how powerful grief is . I'm starting to heal slowly , it's a process.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

So glad you shared with us. That heart cracking open again - I know it too. Glad we're on the healing journey together!

[@FreeBrunoPowroznik]

It's not always that easy though. Getting in touch with toxic shame and abandonment anxiety can trigger feelings of terror and su1cidal urges. It can be fatal

[@everydaytwiceonsundays4498]

The fear of being homeless is bluish white, like a small empty room carved out of ice in the center of my chest. When I finally felt it, I knew what it was about: when I was a kid (scapegoat/black sheep in a narcissistic family system, fun times), I would get locked out of the house during snowstorms, and the cold - that's what it's about, I'm scared of being this cold again.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

So valid - I see you. Thank you for sharing with us. You may also like some of my more recent videos about "parts" work and holding space for that inner child of yours. 💓

[@everydaytwiceonsundays4498]

@@drcaitlinfaas Thank you

[@ydakda7233]

Great work ❤

[@katerineafman1487]

Then you can come and live with me...Because U know this feeling on an emotional level..So deep.the loneluness the fear of dying.... you are welcome in my house and we keep our little hurt children warm and cosy and appreciated.(of course this us from my heart!! no bad or sexual intentions present in this!!) I just am touched by your hurt. ❤

[@everydaytwiceonsundays4498]

@@katerineafman1487 Thank you! A lot of time has passed and I have a safe home now, but I appreciate the sentiment. Peace and safety are so great, I hope everyone can experience them. 💜

[@xx-nv9dc]

you litterally saved my life. no words of gratitude can be enough to express how thankful, grateful I am. you are god sent.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

I'm grateful for you, leaning into the work! 🙏💕

[@ralfwashington1502]

It is crazy but we are all here because the advice if toughening up and men don't cry hasn't help any of us. Lol. Use to think meditation was BS too till I finally tried it. Good stuff thanks!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

So glad you shared, Ralf! I hear you - so much of what we dismiss has powerful lessons within it if we get closer and pay attention.

[@nickolasemerson2092]

Love how direct and logical this was. No empty talk to introduce the concept, or longwinded examples that just serve to take up time... Very applicable technique, Thank you!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, thanks for commenting!

[@eronblue3098]

Really needed this video today, so glad that KZbin recommended this😭 I’ve been binging everything lately from KZbin, Tiktok, to desserts, food, and more and I realized I was just trying to get away from all the boring administrative tasks that needed to be done in my life - not just at work, but also when it came to my finances, cleaning, clothes, chores, messages I haven’t replied to, organizing the house, and more! As a young adult, I feel so overwhelmed by everything but this video helped me to recognize that! I’ve been binging things in order feel ok and put up a front that I’m ok, but now I realize that it’s okay to be overwhelmed😩 and that I need to acknowledge it, sit with it, and then take everythint one step at a time.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Wow, what awareness! Yes, it's okay to feel overwhelmed and to then process it. One step at a time. And when we forget the process, we get back to it when we remember, so it becomes more natural. You're doing great!

[@dlgm161]

Did this today at work, when I felt like acting out on strong emotions. Turned negative emotions, into positive ones.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Glad to hear you could do it at work, David! Keep it up!

[@ajtsanvk]

True. Sometimes some emotions, especially big ones, when you process some hard abuses, lasts soooo freakin long...

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Sometimes I think we have a rulebook for how long emotions are supposed to last. But maybe there is no rulebook. :)

[@ajtsanvk]

@@drcaitlinfaas thats correct :)) hehe

[@kippapao]

yep i am trying to avoid my current sad and painful feelings...wow its so overwhleming....taking a break from it but trying to sit with it...

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Give yourself containers of time to practice it - it doesn't have to be all felt at once!

[@rani1835]

I can’t believe you articulated something, that has been extremely complicated, so incredibly well. I’m truly amazed. I got way more than I imagined I would get from this short but to-the-point video. Thank you very much, you’re amazing 🤩❤️

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Thank you for having open ears to hear it, Rani! I appreciate your message and wish you the best in feeling your emotions. *😀*

[@aksnails]

The beach ball riding the waves really helped me. I have feelings about situations and conversations I want to avoid, dread is probably the best word or anxiety (like a desire to rip the plaster off). I crave junk every time I'm faced with a delicate decision, I eat to soothe but the beach ball is holding its breath!! What I mean by all of this is thanks for the video. I'll listen to it again.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Glad you shared and happy to help! Keep me posted if you have future video requests. 🙏

[@megan-1600]

Wow with these three minutes I feel like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders. I’ve been running from these feelings for nearly a week and all it took to feel better was three minutes!!! Amazing, thank you so so much for this ❤

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Megan! Thanks for taking the time to comment. 😍

[@dianemoril7612]

yes allowing the emotions is the difficult part of acceptance. but no one can avoid it forever... so it's better to do it on purpose.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Well said, Diane. I earned an A for effort at attempting to avoid it forever. 😆❣

[@dianemoril7612]

@@drcaitlinfaas me too, and it almost killed me. so now, I watch this kind of videos, and allow myself to be whatever I need (want) at least once a day. doing it on the spot is still a challenge. so I do it on my meditation time... and yeah, I have a meditation daily since I fell sick from my emotions.... maybe you can share this trick too. have a nice day!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@@dianemoril7612 That's a wonderful practice, Diane! I became a meditation teacher in 2021 for exactly this reason - it's my favorite set of tools to turn to for processing emotions. 💞

[@enneaf1676]

Emotions do not feel themselves, humans create them. So why is it so taboo to dismiss them? They damage so much and get in the way of everything

[@Gohan00777]

Thank you ! I feel anxious when i sit or when i am around people i feel i might panic and think what other people will think if i panic , if I can change this I will be very happy for the rest of my life .

[@drcaitlinfaas]

And your awareness about it will help you grow! Keep focusing on the breath, rather than what the brain says over and over. 💕

[@Gohan00777]

Thank you ,can you give any tips in those panicky anxious moments ?

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@@Gohan00777 I would focus on the breath, not the thoughts. Relax the body as much as possible and soothe yourself. Those techniques often help me when I'm panicking or anxious.

[@mikeleeonline]

That was incredible. Transformational. Thank you Caitlin.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Mike!

[@React2022-u7l]

Love this, will play it every morning.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Glad it's helpful for you!

[@shruthiswaminathan2907]

Thankyou! I’ll need to practice more but I’m already feeling less overwhelmed and more accepting. Thankyou

[@drcaitlinfaas]

It's just like working out at the gym, the more you practice, the easier it gets Shruthi! Keep up the amazing work!

[@Idea_Poli]

It's super powerful. Haven't seen anything like this. Almost listening on repeat daily

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Glad it's working for you, Vishal!

[@khushboosharma1135]

I always get intrusive thoughts about death and the fear is so much! It feels like I'm gonna die right now. I misassume the sudden anxiety bcoz of the intrusive thought , as a sudden symptom of death. Its just I can't even explain

[@drcaitlinfaas]

I understand, Khushboo. The brain tells a story about death, but you can always remind yourself of your physical location and that you are safe. (Assuming no medical conditions - this isn't medical advice!) I coach my clients through thoughts like these. You aren't alone. :)

[@khushboosharma1135]

@@drcaitlinfaas thankyou so much :) I'll do this

[@AdrianA-mo5qd]

I was able to find purpose in life based on my true authentic self, which felt outer worldly. However, overtime, I went through crazy experiences and I was so narrow visioned focused on the work that I wanted to do, that I stopped paying attention to anything else. Eventually I started procrastinating and things got worse and worse. It made no sense to me. I was trying to pursue my true purpose in life, why was I struggling so much? I did not make a habit of regularly checking in with my feelings. Realizing this and doing the work changed everything for me. Seeing your video helped me understand better. Thank you.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

That's wonderful, Adrian! Thank you for sharing your journey with us.

[@Sundog22]

I am in the exact same bucket!

[@nonofinn7136]

Thank You. I actually needed to hear this: how to sit still and listen to my feeling.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're very welcome! I'm so glad.

[@Flutterflyyyyy]

Thank you so much for making it easier to understand. 🤗

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're very welcome!

[@palomac7041]

thank you!! im glad i found your page!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome! So glad you did too!

[@favouritemusic8959]

Thanks a mil Caitlin. Simple, complex yet perfect. Having a really difficult time at the moment sitting with very uncomfortable emotions and situations. You said as if to me - Mary - Just sit with it and let it be and it will pass and it is only a vibration and most importantly it won't kill you. I don't know if you could do a video on anticapatory anxiety which is a first cousin of the above. Thanks a mil for your great advice Caitlin. Mary 🌹🌷

[@drcaitlinfaas]

So happy you found it helpful, Mary! Love that request on anticipatory anxiety - I'll get that recorded and you should see it in November/December 2021. Be sure to sign up for my emails to get the weekly videos! :)

[@Ocasek77]

You're so charismatic, love the analogy with the beach ball riding the waves😊

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Thank you! I didn't make that one up, but I love sharing it - such a good one. Analogies are my favorite!

[@dipsydoodle]

Often, my ego runs rampant and I can't shut it up. It slips in the back door immediately.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Have you tried welcoming it in rather than trying to make it shut up? 😀

[@dipsydoodle]

@@drcaitlinfaas I have to try that. I’m OK. Thank you.

[@MagusKali]

How does it help to know where in your body you feel the emotion? Is it just to give awareness to the sensation? Or is there another underlying purpose?

[@drcaitlinfaas]

For me, it helps direct my brain to the awareness instead of getting lost in my thoughts. It also helps me then use my breath to "move" the emotion if it needs to do that. Then I'm not clinging or pushing away an emotion. But test it out for yourself and see what you find!

[@GovindKumar-gl3db]

whoever is reading this, just go read rapid manifestation secrets by marie runner. i just keep reading this book in phases

[@drcaitlinfaas]

All kinds of techniques out there!

[@Jodangarcla]

These past few days I’ve really been trying to work on myself, I’ve been meditating, trying to eat, trying to clean it’s really hard and I like the relief but I still feel so heavy, I live in a area where the health care system absolutely sucks, I don’t have anyone but myself to rely on(I’m not complaining about it) but it’s hard doing this without professional help. I don’t want to self sabotage but choosing the wrong decisions feels so much more comfortable and the urge to lay in bed and watch tv all day is SO comfortable I don’t know if anything I’m saying right now makes sense but this is just a bit of what’s on my mind, if you can please recommend me some online counseling that’s actually good

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Hi Jodangarcla! It does make sense what you're saying. And thank yourself for showing up for yourself even when it's hard. That's amazing, right there. And positive reinforcement goes a long way. I have personally used Betterhelp and found them very beneficial, offering financial assistance to people too. Or you can look for a practitioner on Psychology Today as another avenue. You're doing great - stick with it!

[@Jodangarcla]

@@drcaitlinfaas thank you so much you’re a saint 🙏

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@@Jodangarcla You're welcome, Jodan. As they say, you're light see my light - we both have it! 🙏

[@vekyll]

Probably doesn't work for neurodivergent people, or I'm just doing it wrong. Whenever I start analyzing my negative emotions, they just become more and more intense and harder to get rid of. I know it won't kill me:), but still, what's the point? What's the benefit of crying over something for a week? Is it just to avoid overeating? Surely seems like not being worth it. Especially since I'm not productive when sad anyway.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

For sure not a technique to use all the time or something that works for everyone. The point is to feel tension release and more freedom on the other side of the processing. So if that’s not happening, I wouldn’t do it. And I also wouldn’t “analyze” the negative emotions, but feel them. In small doses. Lots of different techniques out there to try! 🎉

[@vekyll]

@@drcaitlinfaas Yeah, absolutely it doesn't happen. It just becomes harder. Also, maybe analyzing is the wrong word, but surely _thinking_ about them. And most importantly, your penultimate sentence is probably the key: I never knew how to feel emotions in small doses (I mean, intentionaly -- of course it happens sometimes). Tried some techniques, nothing really felt beneficial in any sense. Thanks for the reply anyway!

[@mwoods4810]

Thank you. You put it out there simply.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Millie! If you ever have video requests, send them my way!

[@AmatielleSativa]

Thank you friend. I am so blessed today and grateful for these cognitive techniques. As a life long member of O/A and E/A I extend to you my gratitude for this very dope information and new skills.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

So glad you commented, Amatielle! Love the Anonymous concepts myself. 🙏

[@ruslankurin4341]

It’s aggravating just sitting with it, I embrace the thoughts and emotions by honing or channeling into them, not by doing things like self sabotage but like putting tension into my body and creating movement like within my jaw or wherever to i guess transmute and move the energy, just sitting with it isn’t enough. I find that to be dangerous and whoever made it that way, is pushing something delusional. I’ll be with the emotion, but just sitting with it isn’t enough, it makes you like a passive lamb who’s holding it in while you’re a teapot ready to overflow. I’m gonna push a new approach with my experience as a 22 year old up and coming man to help others

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Yep, it's just one tool - not to be used all the time, especially if it's more aggravating! ❣

[@ruslankurin4341]

@@drcaitlinfaas thank you for your reply! It’s because my nervous system became more sensitized so it makes it harder

[@user-je1hi6jy1i]

Can we heal the deep rooted toxic shame from childhood with this technique by just feeling that shame, the feeling that i am wrong and i should be punished and i am worthless by just feeling the shame? I can feel my shame in my chest and gut and it is very painful.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Great question. I think healing childhood wounds often takes multiple techniques and multiple time points of using them. If it's too painful to feel shame in your chest/gut, back down from it. Staying in a "window of tolerance" is really important for nervous system healing. And then there's the thought work opportunity too. Your brain might be saying, "I'm wrong, I should be punished, I am worthless," but those aren't truth. So part of the opportunity is to not feed that storyline and create more shame. I do this work with clients and I see my own facilitators because it can be hard to navigate this process alone (some people prefer to do it alone). Cheering you on for your journey. Your awareness about what is going on is huge!

[@calliecature]

Thank you for this short but insightful video. Hopefully I can use this too whenever I remember a bad memory.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Callie!

[@henjelucy]

Thank you. A great reminder of techniques that were given to me many years ago when dealing with a big trauma.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Hen! Happy to remind you of the techniques.

[@pyregarten5012]

For the longest time I've always wondered why the greatest atrocities in history are done by men it isnt that men are evil its that we as a society dehumanize men striping them of a essential part of being a human being and then turn around in arms and wonder why the gender that can't even empathize with themselves lacks empathy for others. To all those healing good luck we have work to do . And I ask the women that see this to put the same urgency you put men to make the world physically safe for women to making it emotionally safe for men . Together lets uplift each other!

[@trinityshears27]

thank you so much

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome!

[@emmanuelleschultze6095]

This is brilliant advice! Thank you kindly!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Emmanuelle!

[@dmgsoultogetherness6667]

having mdd and anxiety sitting with soo many horrible emotions and thoughts is so hard

[@drcaitlinfaas]

And you don't have to do it all alone! 💜

[@dmgsoultogetherness6667]

@@drcaitlinfaas true feels like it though....thanks

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@@dmgsoultogetherness6667 All brains love to believe that storyline. I hear you. You're doing great and I'm cheering you on. :)

[@dmgsoultogetherness6667]

@@drcaitlinfaas dnt make me cry lol thanks

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@@dmgsoultogetherness6667 LOL, I tend to bring it out in people. But that's good! Healthy releasing tears! 🎉

[@Africanimprovdance]

I just cried in a Starbucks… thanks 😅🎉 but I feel better 🕺🏾

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Glad it could come up and out for you, even if it meant in public! ❣

[@DrRock2009]

Brilliant stuff! 👍

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Thank you!

[@DrRock2009]

@@drcaitlinfaas you’re welcome! 🙏

[@the.reader]

Thank you

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome!

[@manubecker]

Good work. Thank you ❤

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome!

[@MsGaella]

Excellent. Thank you.😊

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Gaella!

[@jucartier]

The intro of this video made me feel like someone gets me.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

I'm so glad, Justine! You aren't alone. 💓

[@jayjmoi6744]

Thank you. Just what i needed.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome!

[@jayjmoi6744]

@@drcaitlinfaasJust wanted to say that after I saw you video I went out and what you said that feelings are just vibrations in the body, really stuck in my mind. I then started to have some uncomfortable feelings, but kept that thought in mind, and although it wasn’t pleasant , trying to focus on the vibration, changed everything. I did feel overwhelmed at times, but in a strange way the concept that this feeling was primarily a vibration was both calming and soothing and allowed me to fully engage with what I was feeling. Something I have struggled with all my life. Quite amazing!! Thank you so much again.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@@jayjmoi6744 Love that! And I've found some moments I forget the concept and other moments I remember. Many more moments I remember that it's a vibration these days. 💓

[@watchingworm]

Thanks for the video! Is this similar to internal family systems and talking to the ‘scared’ part?

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome! Yes, you can tie IFS into this by sitting with the scared part and letting it have feelings. I didn't have that language at the time when I made this video, but several more recent videos on my channel talk more about IFS. :)

[@GodHelpMe369]

I guess it's the trauma that causes us to shrink up inside, to want to hide, to die, to be alone. (Because there we at least won't get hurt, again.) Now what? One day at a time. One step in front of the other. At the end of a year, you would have done 365 positive, proactive things toward healing... Maybe it's time to call out for help. I don't know. All I know is I did. To whom? You know. We know. Think back to when you were 5, or 6... (We all know who to call out to if we aren't completely obliterated by then.) We don't see it when we are in it. But my own experience tells me He is there... And ready to help when we call out. Please do, if you haven't. You are loved.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Thank you for sharing your perspective. 💕

[@nestechen]

God and Christ are always listening. We also have a guardian angel ❤❤ God is your true inner being. He is hidden in the deepest of your own heart. Trust him and go the way he shows you, always .

[@enneaf1676]

Emotions get in the way of existence.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

That's one perspective and if it helps you, keep it. For me, believing that is how I ended up as a brain on a stick, numb and wondering why I couldn't feel much. I'm in an animal/human body that has emotions. Accepting and working with that gives me way more freedom than believing they get in the way. 😃

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@AkiIka-j5d Well said. I'd add existence would just be different without any emotions.

[@WW11110]

I've let it be there for years. I've invited it. Welcomed it. Thanked it. Let it be. I'm sick of this feeling all the time. Nothing changes.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Which feeling? Sometimes I think, "Come on, can't I stop feeling cranky sometimes?" But then I remind myself it's part of being human...all the emotions. (And check with your medical professionals of course, if it's feeling like too much / chronic!)

[@alshimasalah1813]

very helpful, thank you

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome!

[@peaceofmindofpeace1650]

Watching this on a sunday, feeling very tired and feeling alone and grief in my heart. I don't feel feminine and attractive and idk why. It's like I'm blocked and dating didn't help. Tomorrow a job interview but nothing has my inrerest or motivation. Well there are some things yes but bc I need an income soon, I can't focus on them now.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're doing great work bringing awareness to your feelings - keep focusing on the body and processing them there rather than answering "why" questions for your brain. :)

[@peaceofmindofpeace1650]

@@drcaitlinfaas Thank you so much for the positive encouragement, it helps :) I have to trust myself and the process after many storms incl..being raped in 2018, them moved twice, now expensive rental apartment savings going down after losing my job of 16 years but as always it will be ok and yes accept my feelings and moments. Telling myself they come and go and I will make positive changes again. I'm to hard on myself, calling myself passive etc..but for what I went through I'm quite resilient and I will find the right job again :) I appreciate your reply 🌷 Edit and you're right, less thinking more feeling physically:)

[@lordalepore]

How amazing it was. Thank you

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Lora!

[@heehee975]

Thanks!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You’re welcome!

[@daisy7606]

Thank youuu it is realyyyy helpfullll❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Daisy!

[@delwendebabette3023]

Thank you 👍🏿🌻❤️

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Delwende!

[@eddiemattison7792]

lol You're right, no one teaches this, or how to do this. Thanks Caitlin. You saved me 40 miles and hopefully alot of therapist trips. :-) Now, excuse me, I have to practice. ;-)

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Enjoy, Eddie! :)

[@AnushkaMaheshwari]

thank you so much for this

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're very welcome, Anushka!

[@The_Undermined]

Thank you

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Maximiliano!

[@smilealways4978]

Recently I even didn't know what i was feeling i saw I stopped eating much I was feeling blackout... Instead i sat and wrote it down what i am feeling why i am feeling who made me feel this how i can try to get over or should I stay ... This video was apt to what I did 🤩>Thank you

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome! So glad to hear this example and how you're making it work for you.

[@kippapao]

so at the mindfullness practice centers we meditate together and the collective energy helps me with sit with the sad feelings, by myslef I need some help, like maybe just a video helping me to talk rhough sitting with these painful feelings and thought..Can you make one?

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Great idea, Maria! I'll get that on the list, in the meantime check out my guided meditations here - www.drcaitlinfaas.com/meditations

[@breathewithesse]

This was so helpful!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Glad you found it helpful and thanks for commenting, Simona!

[@zain4019]

Thank-you very much!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome, Zain! Keep me posted if you have questions.

[@Tamannaaa3608]

Thanku!!!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You’re welcome!

[@Tamannaaa3608]

@@drcaitlinfaas

[@sashachamberlin5904]

Trying to not feel bored because that means i have to find something to do.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Thanks for commenting, Sasha. I'd challenge that belief - boredom can arise and be felt without believing you "have to find something to do." 😀

[@RobbiePfunder]

excellent advice and video thanks!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Happy to help, Robbie!

[@catedoge3206]

ty

[@drcaitlinfaas]

You're welcome!

[@exodus_gaming5282]

I like imagine the beachball and just flop it to the surface, just letting the ball go up and up. And just let it splash at the surface. Let it float

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Great visual!

[@soundhealingwithserena]

What if it’s everything, everywhere all the time? When I try to think about it my mind spirals and thinks of everything it could be. 42 years of trauma and just found out I’m Audhd. So how do I manage that? Also a single mom living under the poverty line.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Sending love! Many facilitators offer sliding-scale sessions - I'd look around locally for some options or search on psychologytoday.com. 🙏

[@seamon9732]

One important thing to keep in mind, this works... UNLESS IT'S A PANIC ATTACK. In my experience, sitting with a panic attack will only make it worse. I could be wrong tho.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

I agree, Seamon! Panic attacks are different. 🙏

[@r.a9876]

But what I’m confused about is that I don’t see myself avoiding my feelings. I’m always stressed and anxious my whole life. And my inner conversations is always about what I feel like everything that I hate and all that bothers me and I’m just a huge complainer 24/7. So how much more feeling of my feelings can I get?? But I have been trying out shadow work the past few weeks which is the same as what your saying here but so far I haven’t noticed anything different. Even with my food addiction is still there and when I want to eat it’s so automatic there’s no stopping me it’s so weird but stressful knowing how I’m self harming with my overeating. Is sitting with the feelings supposed to be all day thing or do I take time out like 10 mins in the mornings and evenings?

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Hey RA! There's not one "right" answer, but I like to check in with my feelings and process in different timed containers. So like you said, maybe 10 mins in the mornings and evenings if that's what you feel called to do in your life at this time. For me, I don't "sit with" my feelings all day. I also like to process with facilitators, not just by myself. I've found healing shadow work and working through overeating takes time and titration, not just a few weeks. It takes integration and brain consolidation. Many of the modalities I use at this point have taken me years of building up and I didn't see the effects at first.

[@r.a9876]

@@drcaitlinfaas thanks for your reply! I have so many triggers I wish I can just do this one thing that takes care of all them

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@@r.a9876 I hear your pain, RA, sending compassion. I personally haven't found one tool to work all of the time, but I do stay open to seeing what works for me and when to dive into repeating practices.

[@melanietempleton2605]

Ok interesting thank you, I tried it and yes , good idea, thank you

[@drcaitlinfaas]

So glad to hear, Melanie! If you have video requests, please send them my way!

[@dualmass]

I watch videos about mindfulness on KZbin when I’m trying to escape My feelings

[@drcaitlinfaas]

😄Awareness is key!

[@JoRobertsGaming1984]

Here's the problem with what yourself and so many others appear to be advocating; it is ripe for misunderstanding. There are people like myself who misunderstand everything. Am I suppose to sit the entire time processing feelings? Am I allowed to watch television whilst eating? What are you saying - that a person is meant to focus on their feelings 100% of the time? What am I meant to do with my time?

[@drcaitlinfaas]

I'd say it's ripe for interpretation. How do you want to interpret it and use it in your life? What makes sense to you? Where do you need clarification after you've practiced?

[@MrS85755]

Great short intro

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Glad you enjoyed, Malte!

[@mirzafatic1663]

Hi Dr. Caitlin, this really resonates with me as i am going through heavy emotions. I there a way to reach you directly? Much love ❤

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Hi Mirza! Sending love for those heavy emotions. [e-mail]

[@joshconn17]

Very similar to David Hawkins letting go technique

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Great connection!

[@obidavekenobe]

you just read my mind…

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Sounds like it popped up at the right time! Happy for you!

[@monikaweld5567]

For some reason, the KZbin algorithm presented your video. I have the opposite problem. I Self deny food. It stems from having to be responsible for finding and making my 2 younger siblings lunches from the time I was 10. There was never any food at home, as we were very poor, and my mom prided herself for raising 4 kids without assistance after my dad left us. I never knew i had an eating disorder until 2 years ago when i was diagnosed with diabetes. I'd been doing okay for the most part. I do not feel hungry at home. I feel hunger while at work, out shopping, etc. For some reason, the last 2 weeks have been bad eatingwise, and i have started to vomit if my imagination brings up images of bugs in my food. I also think ( not always, just sometimes) that the texture of my food is suddenly different in my mouth and my stomach revolts. I am in CBT therapy for the food issue and food hoarding, and i do IFS to heal my parts. Any suggestions?

[@drcaitlinfaas]

The algorithm loves this video. 😃 You have a lot of great awareness about what's coming up for you. Based on what you said, my question is - what are you doing somatically for the healing? Aka - how are you processing the body's tension? Because both CBT / IFS tend to lean toward thinking, the brain. I use both too, but I also needed to add somatic techniques like breathwork, kundalini yoga, network spinal, acupuncture, etc to integrate.

[@monikaweld5567]

@drcaitlinfaas oh.... I have not heard about those types, really. I will definitely investigate them! Thank you so much for your response!!! I did subscribe to your channel after I saw this video. ❤️

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@@monikaweld5567 You're welcome! Excited for your discovery. 💝

[@kaymack5304]

This is so helpful. It seems obvious, but it’s not.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

I'm glad you found it helpful, Kay!

[@merishormeri57]

I sat an hour with my fear and it's still there.Why it doesn't change? Why it doesn't disappear?Please help me.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

How'd you sit with it, Merishor? What did you do with your body and breath during that time? Try experimenting with those as you sit and process emotions. Sometimes emotions stay put and we have to drop any resistance to them staying put. And drop the expectation that they will change. It's counterintuitive, but it's what helps them keep moving - dropping expectations. Accepting what is.

[@ydakda7233]

​@@drcaitlinfaas❤❤❤

[@Viv8ldi]

Memo: what feeling am I trying to avoid right now (by eating)

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Yep, great memo!

[@miket1591]

Thank you :)

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Of course, Mike! Keep me posted on how your processing goes.

[@karolinamroz5596]

What to do when i don't know what im feeling?

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Great question! I like to check in with - can I feel any tension anywhere in my body or do I feel numb? If it's just numb, I'm probably in a freeze state and need to wait for my nervous system to regulate back into a zone where I might feel tension / emotions to process. And I can also ask myself, "am I feeling open or closed?" Those are two places to start!

[@riittalaiho4426]

I think the hardest part of processing emotions is if we end up processing those alone all the time. It does not help sitting with anger due to an argument with a friend or partner. I think you need to fix that argument by having a grown-up talk. Not dwelling in anger. I m not convinced that this sitting with emotions trend is very helpful to anybody. Common sense is.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

I hear you! I view this as one tool / technique to use when it makes sense. 💝

[@jdprettynails]

My feelings feel so intense and I can’t breathe. It hurts so severely like I’m being stabbed.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

That can be a great opportunity to have someone hold space for you while you feel it, so you can be reminded you're safe and secure. 🙏

[@jdprettynails]

@@drcaitlinfaas but I’m always alone when I feel this way

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@@jdprettynails I hear you! I'd keep practicing the tools that help me feel grounded and safe then, even if I'm alone while feeling intense feelings. And remind myself that someone else on the planet is experiencing the same feelings too, even if they aren't with me. Helps remind me I'm not really alone. 🙏

[@taeya...5618]

Mam will i be okay ever again ??

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Yes. Every emotion is temporary, even when they feel like forever, or even when it feels like a really, really long stretch of time. Sending love. 🙏🙏🙏

[@taeya...5618]

​@@drcaitlinfaasthank you so much miss I really need a help from you I shreya from india... I broke up 2 months ago and I have been noticing many things that I am going to list down so I needed help from you so that I can move on and stop wasting my energy of solving things...... 1. Whenever a good thought pop up I get really scared that I will stuck to one guy forever even tho he cheated on me for 2 years form 2 nd year his behaviour was totally changed where he doesn't care at all what I feel...never seems excited to talk but he understood what I wanted but pretends like he doesn't care the relationship feels like I only making efforts....nd whenever I open up about what i wanted he just reply in casual way and afterwards convo move on he always like ok break up then Like he never tryyy....his best 2. Even tho I am saying this I feel like are you sure But I know yess it is true Positive things start overshadowing negative aspects 3. I really don't want to waste my energy in this....because it's so clear that he doesn't love me..and cheated on me ....and he even said I really don't care anything about you... 4. Can you plz tell me some strong phrases...that I can use Because always a image comes in my mind of 2 years back then he said this to you...even tho it wasn't true at all he was just trying to make his image good in front of me... 5. I just want to move forward and to tell my brain that whatever he said to manipulate you by saying I don't want to waste your years anymore you will get hurt....blah blah I just want to stay focused on my present and future and know that he has gone already 6. One more important thing that I told my brain " hey brain it's not important anymore " but the thing is I have to repeat what he has said to me..all the time whenever a positive thought pops up and then cycle repeats of proving myself right 7. The thing I noticed wht am I telling my brain the negative aspects it's like not accepting and taking it's false even tho I know it's totally true...

[@Risterkin90]

The mole!

[@catedoge3206]

real.

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Thanks, Cate!

[@ekennahutchinson1636]

Writing ✍️ down what happened and how I feel

[@drcaitlinfaas]

That's amazing! Keep it up!

[@emmaskoog8666]

👏👏

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Thanks, Emma!

[@VHS_TERMINATOR]

❤❤❤

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Glad you watched!

[@annaberg1200]

When I get anxiety and panic, my legs don't control at all. When I'm out walking, my legs stop working. Anyone else?

[@drcaitlinfaas]

I haven't seen that before, but it's probably just because it's outside of my expertise. I'd check with your health team. :)

[@annaberg1200]

@@drcaitlinfaas I have no support

[@drcaitlinfaas]

@@annaberg1200 Sending love! Here's a great resource for finding help - www.cdc.gov/mentalhealth/tools-resources/individuals/index.htm

[@annaberg1200]

@@drcaitlinfaas I live in Sweden 🇸🇪

[@BowdreTheWriter]

Tiktok brought me here!!!

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Welcome, Ebonie!

[@horikrichard8647]

We cant survive all of them

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Survive all of your feelings or did you mean something else?🙏

[@nirgunawish]

i think men have it way harder with emotions because testosterone makes it very hard to feel

[@drcaitlinfaas]

Interesting! I haven't studied the link between hormones and emotions.

[@Michael-it7nx]

50 years old.. Id say men struggle , due to being shamed when crying, I recall so many memories as a child, and I watched elders or listened to them…. Then the jokes … it confused me really bad. i struggle with relationships and jobs, I can do the work, but it’s relations I struggle with on and off the job.