How to Break the Habit of Being "YOU"

[@TheHolisticPsychologist]

#selfhealers, here are some ways to get out the habit self to begin consciously creating who you are. Let me know if this is helpful in the comments. -Nicole

[@KingPolly]

The Holistic Psychologist as always, I am so grateful!

[@guidedbysunshine333]

Amazing videos Id love to hear more on a regular podcast

[@colegregg8245]

I don't understand why you would tell someone to not be who they are. It's okay, I've realized this channel simply isn't for me anymore.

[@Rose-hu3jv]

Is so helpfull, thank you so much Im really struggling cause Im like why do I go back I want to chance why is it so hard.

[@gentlebutch]

I needed this video so bad today thank you for sharing. Your inner child meditation is my nightly routine now. It's helped a lot with PTSD nightmares.

[@deelot1]

“Each moment affords another opportunity” - thank you I needed to hear that today.

[@brightclouds98]

This mental resistance reminds me a lot about fitness. You have to get over the burning uncomfortable sensation of working out physically from living a sedentary lifestyle but after a while you get used to it.

[@5sssssssssssssssssss]

Hello Dr. Nichole I tried your journal for 30 days and did not miss a single day, my aim that time was to say No to people without feeling shame guilt or fear, and to set boundaries and maintain them. Long story short your journal forum transformed my life, I back then would not imagine in my life that I would be able to say No so easily. However your journal made that possible to me. Thank you so so so much

[@tanyabarbie895]

salma omg that’s amazing!!!

[@summaiyarobi4915]

Well-done ❣️❣️

[@lufthanza101]

Hello, would u be able to Share the video with me?

[@redmikask]

Hello Salma. Since you have a great experience, can I ask you for help? I want to start the journal, but I am not sure if I should answer the same questions for one pattern for 30days?

[@thefitrookiedad]

That's so encouraging to hear! Can I ask you that, did you keep just 1 Intent/promise to yourself everyday for 30 days, or did you set different intentions for each day?

[@juliab.8779]

One of my favourite mantras is "I choose" because I feel so empowered by it.

[@DEEPCYCLEGARAGE]

21 days of moments not drinking. I am celebrating being a more pleasant father, husband, person to be around.

[@Kevin-sy3jt]

Congratulations on those 21 days. I hope after all this time you've been doing better and better!

[@ketsial5669]

Being on this journey can almost feel like fun once you accept it and realize you’re not alone on it! ✨

[@supro2989]

More power to everyone who is healing

[@Paracheckyam]

I love that your videos are short but very clear !

[@mahaabdelkhalek2552]

I was so lost when I first started following you and hearing about future self journaling, I didn't know what I should change actually, but I listened to your advice about observing myself and found few patterns came up, they were surprising to me. I realized that I'm not as self confident as I think I am, having been overshadowed, bullied any body shamed my whole life still affect me even when I say that it doesn't. I noticed that I shrink in too many situations thinking that I'm so much less than what I really am, and I go back to that bullied little girl again. and that's my aim to change now. Thank you a lot for your work!

[@summaiyarobi4915]

Same !! I constantly put myself down and compare myself to other skinnier females but in my head in like oh I'm confident lol

[@isabelsaavedra7947]

I found that I struggle to celebrate victories because as a child I was not encouraged. My caretaker was emotionally absent most of the time so I developed a way to live also disconnected. Now, as a 30 old woman, I am recovering my inner life and recreating the stories of my past from a more compassionate perspective. I definitely want to be there for me, and support me in each step of the process.

[@EE-bg1de]

Appreciate this video: I carry around alot of emotional baggage every single day. From being exposed to my Dad's porn at an early age, to being made fun of for being fat, and subsquently struggling with addiction for 20 years.....I appreciate video's like this. I'm extremely self aware which leads to being self absorbed.....it's a domino affect. I need to take life one moment at a time, small promises at a time, and just focus on getting through the day. 1 day at a time, appreciate your video.

[@miriru93]

The fact that I never thought about "being exposed to porn as a child" as part of the problem

[@nidhulek]

Self absorbed leads to see aware and vice versa- insightful.

[@sometime.somewhere]

@@miriru93 yes i honestly am the same, can someone walk me through how that could manifest as problematic? Are we talking about material your parent was in or their collection...

[@Abundance26]

Saw the title in my notification earlier and thought of self preservation. A teacher told me cpl yrs ago that while I developed certain behaviors because I had to defend myself, I no longer need to defend myself so I can drop those behaviors. It never left my mind. I was just reading a book from Iyanla and there's a passage that I believe goes perfectly with what you're speaking abt here... "Our defense is based on the fact that if we let go of what we think we know about ourselves, we won't have anything else to rely on. The prospect of losing ourselves, even momentarily, can be pretty frightening. But that's what we have to do: we have to lose false self to find true self.'

[@TaraWagner]

Abundance26 powerful 🙏🏻

[@Abundance26]

@@TaraWagner thanks 😊

[@SophiliaLarkWoodbury]

I loved this lesson. "A conditioned self that acts from the past." I understand this very visually based on my recovery from complex trauma. Painful past learning was always intruding into my present causing me to perceive threat where there was no threat. It was only after I learned how to widen that space between stimulus and response (via relaxation, grounding, self-regulation in the face of a perceived threat) that I was able to leave the habit self and experience growth and freedom.

[@hcr32slider]

Have a look into Jordan Peterson too. He sends a similar message but in a more straight forward way. A little less precious lol

[@haliec4713]

Strive to be a little better than you were yesterday. I read this somewhere and it links in with what you are saying here about habits. Doing one thing daily and choosing to be a better version of ones self, striving to be a little better than yesterday in small easy achievable goals.

[@FleurMarigold]

you always seem to have exactly the video I need

[@thrivinglittles]

“Celebrate yourself”, bringing the joy, oh the process (and reward) in this in my experience. 💫 moment to moment it is!

[@TheHolisticPsychologist]

you know it, Katie!

[@mmohseni69]

Thank you so much for being so giving want to make the world a better place for the collective ❤️☀️🙏 I wish you an amazing day🦋

[@vickicsurbs444]

I used to be very disciplined, but in 2018 & 2019 I had alot of surgeries and got exhausted & drained. I guess I gave up. I needed to hear this🙌 Thank you for this video.

[@TaraWagner]

Vicki C's UR BS so sorry you went thru this. If I can make a recommendation, find a good “functional medicine doctor”. Sometimes the trauma of surgery throws the body and emotions out of balance. FMPs are so good at getting to the root. Good luck to you. ❤️

[@susanreed666]

Vicki C. I am facing just such a 2020 -- 2021. So glad you are in recovery, and that this lesson helps!

[@sandrajames3350]

I am just now finding you, seeing this today was an answer to my prayer, asking for help to "find myself", only learned in last couple months I probably have CPDST due to childhood traumas. You are a blessing. I am sharing this with 3 of my clients, who have over the months indicated they had some issues... they asked for additional support.

[@pennysbrilliantlife4952]

I needed this. I just said to myself I am tired of being me.

[@miyeko79]

This is exactly what I need! I have horrible discipline and am all over the place most of my day. Im going to do belly breathing every day. You rock Nicole!!!!!

[@khybersanga4413]

Hi Dr.Nichole wonderful door ways to new being, thats what I have been going through and sure my friends has gotten short but I am happy that I am more try to be on Concious side and not on auto mode. Journaling helps a lot as well .. your lectures are so easy to follow and love the old school style that its on paper hand written no slides or graphics! Stay blessed

[@mantraymedicina367]

Many thanks. I rewatched this today after seeing it a year ago and it is strange how I see or understand more. These days I am on an an ego awareness search within myself no shortage of material! Your old “basement”studio I see! Those were the days! Your new electronic screen makes reading your notes lots easier. ✅. Go go!

[@kcoker9189]

This is going to be difficult I already know... But your videos have been the light at the end of the tunnel for me and I so appreciate them. I look forward to progressing and getting to know my authentic self. Thank you very much!!

[@ayoungethan]

My therapist recommended I check you out. Glad I did. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for doing what you do. Also, mad props to my therapist :)

[@priancavail6520]

Thank you doctor...reframing our stories and looking at TRUTH in the PRESENT MOMENT, not from past projection is really important, at least for my healing journey!!

[@yvonne5703]

I absolutely love this lady. She has been such the best teacher for me.

[@isabelvina]

Thank you for this one.. I am re watching this videos and the celebrate victories is something I always forget.. thank you for remember me 🥰 you are the greatest Nicole hope you are doing well .I consider and acknowledge you a lot

[@KalanYTRock]

Thank you for all your hard work Dr Nicole!

[@TheHolisticPsychologist]

My pleasure, Kalan!

[@emersonchang2357]

This is absolutely wonderful, Dr. Nicole! I needed it. Sometimes the habit self has a voice way louder than the conscious self, and it is hard to fight that desire for the familiar and comfortable, even though I know the habits are not serving me. So thank you so much for your clear articulation.

[@Brogrl]

Thank you for posting this video. All steps seem doable and not too scary to start. Thank you friend.

[@yonguhlig270]

Dr Nicole, this is so helpful. Thank you. Celebrating victories. SO BIG. SO KEY! And each moment affording ANOTHER opportunity. Coming from a perfectionistic background these two points are ones I MUST embrace during this time of major heartache and transition.

[@jovani4921]

I am loving all of your videos! Thank you for sharing this information.

[@EllenWheeler]

You are amazing! Your work has influenced my life so much. Your videos are so relatable and authentic. Thank you so much!!

[@liliworth8098]

This is excellent, thank you. I had an experience last week and overdid everything... back to the start again. My Fear and terror really overwhelmed my very young new habits. Next moment took me a couple days. Thankyou, Verr helpful. Love Lili ❤️🌞🌻✨🤸‍♀️

[@KNRK379]

very helpful, concrete video. I like how it's more zoomed in & easy to read what's on your board. Thank you for your videos & all you do 💙💙

[@kayelavelasquez9009]

Thank you so much I really needed this!! ❤️❤️❤️you brought me a sense of peace so for that thank you❤️❤️

[@mariaelena3016]

Healing myself with your content. Thanks Dr.Nicole!

[@bethanysaxton7351]

God Bless you, Dr. Nicole. I am so grateful for you; you’ll never know what an impact you’ve had in my healing journey. I cannot thank you enough.

[@Calmingeffex]

very very helpful thank you, especially recreating the stories around failure!

[@babz1235]

Thank you so very much for all your lessons. I’ve learned more from you in a few short videos than I have learned in 6 months of therapy on past childhood trauma and dealing with my inner child issues. Thank you again for your short but powerful therapy sessions.

[@est6464]

Just fine listening to Dr. Joe Dispenza Gaia talks on this! I like how easy you break it down.

[@sandrajovic9304]

Agree very much

[@celiayancey269]

I appreciate your videos, Dr. Nicole. I have been doing the future self journal for almost one year now and am amazed at the changes I have been able to make in my life. I am getting better at setting boundaries and observing myself when I resist keeping promises to myself. I feel lighter than I have ever felt in my life. Thank you for your important work.

[@gcchica004]

Recently found your channel, and it aligns so well with where I'm at on my spiritual journey of healing. Just started my future self journaling this morning and really identify with this video. Thanks for all you do!

[@teresaluker1728]

"each moment does afford you another opportunity" thank you!

[@HIPHOPDANCE1000]

Your videos are so motivational. I feel so hopeful and calm when I watch them. Thank you for giving us such tools to work with ourselves. You are a 💎

[@vaishalivaidya7978]

I just love your content. It would be an honor and a privilege to meet you in person someday😊🙏

[@Carroty_Peg]

Thank you for this! I do your journal every day. I still am not good at asserting boundaries and go back into fight or flight. This gives me faith that bit by bit, it's possible to change xxx

[@irisw3989]

Great advice about changing our attitude to failure!!😊😊

[@MidoriMuse]

I need more on this topic. Maybe examples or scenarios. This is key for me.

[@halfaber7776]

So rich in content I look forward to listening to this again and again... More for the undisciplined passionate side of me

[@ernestoparisii]

This is the key, very well explained as usual. Can get through to you anymore, you are a superstar. I love it!!! ❤️❤️❤️

[@mariateresaemotionalmusings]

I watched you here and then I rewatched it so I could make notes from the video. What you suggest is so simple, not easy but definitely doable. Btw...love the texts that you send out!! They seem to arrive F the best times, snapping me back into consciousness and the present moment. By following you on all these platforms I keep myself fully accountable. So grateful to have discovered you❤

[@e.t_kitty2229]

I just found your channel today, & I'm so happy I did. Thank you so much. I really needed this guidance more than ever. I really enjoy how u keep it simple & short, that is very helpful for a lot of people to pay attention & more easily grasp the info & wisdom that u are teaching. Immense blessings sweet soul!!! 🙌💜🕊🙏🌞🌹🙂😊🤗🕊💗

[@kellybethmcmahon9761]

Thank you for these videos! They came to me at the perfect time!!

[@mybrainisuseful]

Thank you so much for this, so timely in my life with actual practical steps, thank you thank you 🤍🤍🤍

[@tomasanonymous]

Thank you so much Nicole. Your Future Self Journal prompts have been so helpful, as well as all your social media posts. Very grateful for your work 💖

[@somethintru1]

Very helpful. Thank you.

[@oscargrajales3460]

Thanks for your videos. You are good explaining them♥️♥️🌹🌹🌷🌸♥️♥️

[@brookecoleman845]

Can you share a practical example of how one would celebrate victories, other than just that internal chatter of “wow way to go you did that thing, you kept that small promise” What are some ways people celebrate their victories ?

[@danijohnnie]

Great Job!!! Definitely needed this!

[@user9994_]

I’ve been waiting for a video on this topic specifically... I’m the type of person who’s willing to improve myself and apply new habits but over time I tend to find myself going back to my old habits which I get frustrated over because I always thought I can never become a better version of myself and that I’ll stay the same way

[@Todayoneday]

Very needed to hear that ! Thank you for the share and your work ! I’ll start tomorrow to keep a promise ! Lot of love from France ❤️

[@nicolettavitulli4724]

Very educational thank you I'm going to try starting tomorrow morning🙏

[@TheHolisticPsychologist]

I love hearing that.

[@brendalynquiah9893]

Love this. Wish you would make longer videos. Your work has been so helpful to me and my healing journey ❤️

[@gracesanity6314]

Thank you for your talent of teaching. What a gift. I come home from my once a week therapy and l listen to you. In much gratitude. Ireland

[@thesacredselfmuse]

Great suggestions! Are you aware of Joe Dispensa? He wrote a book "break the habit of being yourself" his work is.in neuroscience? Epigenetics & quantum physics. Its great to hear these methods emerging from all.sorts of professional modalities! Thank you for sharing & shining bright!

[@malteserb1875]

Thankyou so much! Very insightful and lovely presence

[@DawnEBloom-kx5kk]

Freshly helpful, thank you so much for helping us increase wellbeing❣️

[@Emlo55011]

I am really enjoying your videos! Thank you!

[@Lunalane567]

I watch this video everyday, thank you very much for posting

[@cwizzy13]

Thank you for this. This is awesome!

[@mlewis3068]

This was so helpful - thanks very much!

[@e1b153]

This was very helpful , I have problems keeping promises to myself, I am going to save this video

[@DjGoGo09]

Very good. Hope you get paid well for these videos, it's very helpful. Master yourself and you'll be able to do anything

[@clairerafisura2280]

Your videos makes me want to be better

[@owlcatxx]

Thank you thank you thank you; you are incredible.

[@thinkingoutloud1466]

Thank you. This was very helpful. I have always struggled with discipline. Will start with baby steps.

[@quinnm.3127]

O.O Thanks Nicole, I signed up for the journal prompts!

[@unashamedrecoverypodcast]

That’s some great advice! Loved the video

[@MusicaErika]

Your videos are so helpful thank you so much 🙏

[@nourhanzaghloul1246]

I really struggling with caffeine addiction even it seems a small challenge but failure makes me hope less but I got the missing part Which is the daily intention and the consistency

[@radicalhonesty3628]

can't focus on the video, drowning in shame: - absolute failure in my career - unattractive/overweight/diabetic - zero friends, never been in a relationship - poverty - shackled by the past, by my fears (no idea how to turn my life around)

[@johnslaymaker]

🙏ton of us in a similar boat. More of us, than the rulers of this world.

[@thulimsezane182]

Thank you for this 🤎

[@xomegsxo]

Thank u so much for sharing this content ❤️❤️

[@tanvi9456]

I love your channel ❤️ Thank you so much 😇

[@adrianorizzopt]

Beautiful video, so basic, so simple. Thanks for making this.

[@dougarnold7955]

Oh, this sounds interesting. I'm just getting to it now, I had it on watch later. Thanks.

[@aviuttam9121]

Just excellent!! Thanks!!

[@samanthab6668]

Awesome!!!! wow - thankyou thankyou thankyou🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩

[@marinleeart]

I cycle through periods of depression and when I go through those low, lows...in your practice have you found these techniques help to make these low cycles shorter? I'd love to find tools to help me work on this!

[@ayoungethan]

Me too. To share my experience, I do not know if I have and I have not been officially diagnosed with bipolar, but feel I have those tendencies. However my cyclicality feels more circumstantial and experiential than time-based. For my entire life, I have suffered from not only severe depression and anxiety, but also chronic pain and other illness (migraines, back spasms, fatigue, brain fog, dizziness, etc). Four years ago, after a complete failure to understand my health challenges in the context of the medical industrial complex, I decided to try an Elimination Diet process and discovered that I was highly intolerant of everything in the nightshade family, cow based dairy, and most seed based foods and added sugar. Eliminating or minimizing those foods on my diet provided immediate and lasting relief, as well as incremental development of resilience. I believe diet is a highly individualized thing, but I do recommend that everyone understand their allergies, their allergies, intolerances and sensitivities through some sort of elimination/reintroduction/testing process. symptoms can last or even take up to 3 to 4 days to manifest or evolve, so keeping a journal is essential (who remembers what they ate 3 days ago?) I am now focused on the hard work of changing habits and thinking errors I have developed that continue to perpetuate my suffering. for example, only a few months ago did I finally successfully minimize my suffering while in a depressive state by acknowledging and accepting the depressive state without the need to contribute further with shame and guilt and other forms of self-hatred. This made the lowest low less low, less traumatic and easier to emerge from. Baby steps. the lesson for me in this is that it is really important for me to attack from every angle: lifestyle/habits, medication (especially those supporting neuroplasticity, such as psilocybin), diet/nutrition, counseling/peer support, etc. Stress during a depression absolutely emphasizes and reinforces the depression, I found it immensely beneficial to communicate proactively to friends and family not only my health status but also my needs in terms of when where how and whether they engage with me

[@margaretek5350]

This is awesome thank you 🙏

[@angelglowstudios1454]

I love this lady

[@alyssavanmouwerik3854]

Love your videos and your emails so much. Thank you!

[@adridrope]

very helpful! thank you

[@snood454]

Amazing, thank you

[@nurulsalsabila2754]

thank you so much!

[@jurassicpig]

So relatable

[@jessicalynn4415]

Thank you 💜