How To Work Through Transference & Countertransference In Therapy - Inner Work Library [106/500]

[@jordanthornton]

*1-1 Mentorship Information: Price & Structure (Maximum Capacity = 20 Clients Per Year)* It's an absolute pleasure to film these KZbin videos, and I feel fortunate to receive an abundance of meaningful messages every week, but I am unfortunately faced with the disappointing reality of turning away the vast majority of people who want to work together. I have significantly limited availability and can only support twenty people per year because I do not offer one-off calls or drop-in consulting sessions. Twenty individuals might not sound like maximum capacity, but the last few years of teaching have taught me the importance of maintaining tight energetic boundaries if I want to keep uploading these free videos in addition to serving my current clients to the best of my ability in 2024. To minimise confusion and enhance transparency, I've spent several hours writing this ridiculously long comment to help you decide if my Inner Work Mentorship is the right choice for your development & what you could reasonably expect from working closely together. Please take the time to read this service description before contacting me on Instagram… or feel free to stop reading right now if you’re not interested in my fees, session structure, client expectations, etc. ... *READ BEFORE SCROLLING FURTHER:* I'm interested in long-term change and structural transformation, which is why I've never offered one-off sessions. Complex issues cannot be resolved in a few hours, but we likewise need to define an upper limit for containment and collaboration. I've learned that deep and enduring self-integration requires at least four months of immersive effort. Why four months? It's enough weekly contact for us to work through multiple complex issues and developmental possibilities, but short enough to mitigate against unconscious co-dependency and motivational stagnation. I'm currently accepting a maximum of two new clients per month - message me after reading the following section to check my availability. ... *HOW I WORK & WHO I WORK WITH* Unlike other coaches and teachers who take an understandably more relaxed approach to healing and integration, my mentorships are characteristically intense. This is a highly-demanding, high-investment process which requires our consistent combined effort over a period of four months. If we were to start working together, I would reasonably expect you to be excited to show up for a minimum of 10+ hours of self-motivated transformative practice per week (daily reading, fitness routine, creative exercises, spiritual reflection, etc.) while also maintaining full-sobriety (no drink, no drugs, no cigarettes, no vapes). These strict standards of discipline and sobriety are plainly unsuitable for most people in most situations - even genuinely motivated individuals who resonate with my KZbin videos may not be the right match for four months of structured mentorship. If you want to get deeper, I've noticed that there's a certain type of ‘temperament' & 'timing’ to get the most out of me. I'm interested in alert, creative and purpose-driven individuals who aspire to exceptional standards of self-maturation and would enjoy the feeling of going through week-on-week of progressively stacked transformative experiences for a third of a year: my ideal client is somebody who is willing to bring forward their internal complexity with a sense of courage and transparency with the intention of nothing less than full-spectrum transformation & rapid acceleration on their personal path. I am yet to discover another supportive figure who offers something comparable to this mentorship: a four-month, structured yet flexible 1-1 container which is simultaneously therapeutic, academic and action-oriented; with primary focus placed on tangible improvements in your felt sense of self-knowledge and self-integration; in addition to making consistent and meaningful progress towards your unique goals and mentorship aspirations. I prioritise contact, compassion and accountability, which means that your work never really 'ends' at the end of your session. You can reasonably expect to be fed dozens of customised reading suggestions and follow-on perspectives outside of the formal sessions via friendly and informal messenger contact, where I am active and available four days per week to cultivate an intimate personal connection while likewise enhancing your positive momentum via accountability check-ins and additional support as required. By way of conclusion for what feels like an extraordinarily long comment and service description, I feel compelled to once more emphasise that working directly with me is unrealistic for most people in most situations. I often support people who are accustomed to wrestling with the emotional challenges associated with working through complex wounds in previous therapeutic relationships before we begin our coaching work together. Even individuals without 'hard trauma' can expect moments of pressurised darkness and heaviness during periods of shadow contact as you begin to restructure your personal unconscious. We will be exploring your psyche and soma at scale and depth, and it will be your responsibility to keep me informed about the emotional texture of your internal reality, especially if you encounter negatively charged experiences, and I will of course do everything in my power to support you through the hard times as we integrate the darkness and move forwards together. KZbin is a wonderful place for me to share free research resources and offer accessible inner work invitations; my private mentorships, however, are the place for collaborative partnership and emotional security as we identify, navigate and restructure oftentimes confronting and challenging conscious and unconscious physical, emotional and mental material. Ultimately, this is a highly-demanding but highly-rewarding process which requires the best of our shared intentions. ... *SESSION STRUCTURE & FEES:* The total fee for an Inner Work Mentorship (including 12 x 2 hr sessions) is £7,400 GBP or approximately $9,400 USD. This is my only coaching programme, and my mentorship pricing is liable to adjustment over time. Each private session lasts two hours, and is facilitated via Telegram video call at an ideal time for both of us. Your mentorship extends over a linear four-month period, with a total of twenty-four hours of structured session time, in addition to four days per week of unlimited messenger availability for accountability updates, voice note exchanges and informal calls upon occasion. I do not work on Mondays, Tuesdays or Wednesdays, but I am fully-available across all timezones for regular calls and messenger contact on Thursday - Sunday. If you’ve scrolled this far, and resonate with what I’m offering, I invite you to message me on Instagram. It would be my pleasure to start exploring your goals and intentions in real-time. IMPORTANT: I am an intentionally independent coach, and not a licensed therapist or associated with any professional bodies or coaching institutions, and therefore enjoy the freedom to collaborate with my clients across all areas of life in an intimate, direct and highly involved coaching style. I work with no more than twenty people per year, and am currently accepting a maximum of two new clients per month. I also manage my own inbox and do not use automated systems or employ people to pretend to be me on Instagram, which means that it usually takes four to six weeks for me to respond to new messages and begin the interview process. Although my approach takes time, I hope you ultimately appreciate my personal emphasis on authentic and confidential communication from the very beginning of our relationship. I once again encourage you to message me immediately if you want to start working together within the next two months - bump yourself to the top of my inbox, and I’ll send you some voice notes to get our conversation started.

[@Aleksandria3]

Jordan good valid key points of being in a circumspection awareness among other human interactions! ☺️

[@jordanthornton]

It's such a valuable skillset, thanks for taking the time to comment.

[@isabellagracewhite]

Thank you for this Jordan. I've always felt that transference is referenced to in a sense that it is some isolated concept that only arises in a therapeutic context. I feel the truth of the matter, which is that we project onto all sorts of people in all different aspects of our lives, is not often spoken about enough. Unless we are fully emotionally resolved (and who is?), I don't see how we are to avoid this. So what you mention about clinical intuition and conscious communication as a basis to be conscious of this, but not be afraid to be human, resonates a lot with me. I also really resonate with what you mention about physical touch/comfort in therapy. I do feel this is somewhat moving in mechanical direction, fueled partly by fear as you mention, which I find quite sad... But that's a separate topic. I currently work in a highly boundaried workplace and hope to be stepping into a therapeutic capacity next year. I've had fear/conflict around how to be human as a therapist at work while still maintaining my boundaries, so this video has helped me with current issues troubling me. Thank you again 🙏🌟

[@jordanthornton]

Great to learn more about you here, and I appreciate your thoughtful reflections, Isabella 🌲

[@nicoleconnor_]

A few years ago I said that my life felt like I was constantly “feeling my way through a labryinth of mirrors”. I was hyper-attuned to the push/pull of somatic and logical projection dynamics and it was starting to drive me a bit nutty. This video sums that experience up quite well. 18:35 You can only trust others to the degree in which you trust your Self and 3rd party risk mitigation ensures we never have to truly bear the full weight of our choices. Changing the underlying factors on how we enter into agreements with practitioners can fundamentally change the landscape of healing. Insurance + associations have replaced professional discernment, which has also removed the humanity from therapeutic spaces. There is an exciting paradigm shift coming and a reckoning that can no longer be avoided.

[@iamlindavilela]

Thank you for brilliantly sharing your take on this topic Jordan. I feel like I'll have to watch this video multiple times and go through the books you mentioned to properly digest and integrated what you shared. Thank you for going all the way into this, I truly appreciate it.

[@jordanthornton]

It wouldn’t have happened without you, Linda. Thanks for getting involved and always going deep!

[@rodettepretorius6355]

Love this video. Thank you for the reading!

[@jordanthornton]

Happy to hear this.

[@gitu_tg]

😮 My God! Too much to process.. 🤯 Thank you so much, Jordan! Such an important topic.. This video points on the importance of getting trained for coaches and teachers in today's world..

[@jordanthornton]

Yes, absolutely. It’s one of those many layered topics hahaha

[@brandonbabesz]

always on point! I keep watching your videos bc you make so much sense thank you for doing this. Im on the waitlist for a Therapist and your helping so much. 😳

[@jordanthornton]

Truly happy to be helpful, wishing you well 🌲

[@Jacqueoldfield]

Love your videos Jordan, thank you for everything always 💜🌸🦋

[@jordanthornton]

You’re always welcome!

[@gailaltschwager7377]

Thank you, Jordan.

[@jordanthornton]

Always welcome, thank you!

[@axelsanabria5354]

Idk how your video ended up in my feed, but... HOLY SHIT, you have a deep voice LMAO

[@jordanthornton]

It’s not that deep bro 😉

[@axelsanabria5354]

@@jordanthornton I'm pretty sure that you can sing Exile and it would sound exactly as deep as Bon Iver 👀

[@yuiitodoro7791]

Omg ...searched the comments to if there is anyone who thought the same ..... I literally can't listen without getting distracted by it lol 😅 , It's like ppl talk like this I feel it in my stomach? I have it happen in songs and I like them , but in normal convos it is very distracting

[@JennyBesserit]

Transference gets a bad rap. It can also can be beneficial. I forget where I read this but I was always under the impression that you're to choose a female therapist if you have mommy issues and a male therapist for daddy issues because you're putting your own transferences and projections to work in a therapeutic way.

[@jordanthornton]

For sure - positive transference is often overlooked and is essential for supportive work!

[@isabellagracewhite]

Yes I love this, such a good point.

[@emmapinn5216]

Thanks for the informative video

[@jordanthornton]

Thank you - good luck with your work in this space.

[@ilonabaier6042]

On pg. 324 (German edition) of Rememberances, Dreams and Thoughts Jung states that by becoming conscious of a transference and by "recalling" it, objectivity can be achieved which could lead to individuation. It involves freeing onself from evaluations which cause feeling-based binding to desire. The info in this video seems to be more complicated than his insight.

[@jordanthornton]

With respect, I do believe it's more complicated than this single quote presents. Jung is excellent, but we're likewise served by seeing what other therapists think about this issue as 1-1 therapy developed throughout the 21st century. Humanistic psychology in particular, hope this helps.

[@ilonabaier6042]

Well is has sure worked well with me and in my experience. Simpicity, you know. @@jordanthornton