Howard's Horrible Jewish Schooling

[@11UncleBooker22]

Gilbert Gottfried singing Hebrew is piss my pants funny.

[@psiclops521]

I had to go to Hebrew School. Anyone who isn't familiar with it, Hebrew School is where they send Jewish children to teach them to hate Judaism. All your friends get to go home after school and do their homework and then go out and play, but you have to go to school for several hours several days a week and then go home and do your homework and go to bed and you don't even get to watch the Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour. I would like Jews more if I weren't one and didn't have to go to Hebrew School. We could all read Hebrew and nobody understood a word of it. What a freaking waste of time. It's 45 years since I was Bar Mitzvahed and I haven't been in a synagogue since. I don't understand why people hate Jews if they never had to go to Hebrew School.

[@GrizzWald49]

Sounds exactly like my dad's experiences with Judaism / Hebrew school growing up in 50s NYC

[@PineMartinAmerican]

+Psi Clops This is also my experience. It is a shame that it is taught so poorly.

[@psiclops521]

+StrnFn9099 That's an interesting remark. See, what I don't understand is stupidity. So when someone writes, "teach them to hate Judaism" and someone is so stupid they read that as "hate Jews", I am unable to understand why the reader doesn't get the distinction. Maybe, since you're the nitwit who couldn't understand a perfectly understandable sentence, you could explain where your comprehension malfunctioned.

[@psiclops521]

Thanks. We were just having fun with the topic and then we get that whiner in here to tell us how we are all just awful people. F him...and F Jackie.

[@enemywithin1295]

Psi Clops I'm not Jewish, but this comment made me laugh so fucking hard. Thank you.

[@mistie2835]

This is Howard at his best. Absolutely hilarious. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@rabidrabbitshuggers]

Oddly enough, it was the same exact experience I had being raised as a Catholic, and the reason I left the church.

[@theamericanpitbullterrier6063]

Modern day Catholicism is Judaizm.

[@bgill7475]

Sile72 you only have to look at how they protected pedos for so long. True evil.

[@onie4024]

Catechism...

[@rabidrabbitshuggers]

@@theamericanpitbullterrier6063 Nah we’re still poor and stupid 🥁

[@richardespinoza6243]

Same here because of those child molesting priest.

[@opencurtin]

Howard Stern could make algebra funny ...

[@jcc152509]

He sucks, and the woke HS is a shell of his old miserly and self-consumed self.

[@arkjag2991]

"I'm the most educated uneducated person you ever met" Felt that line hard.

[@MEEG0L]

Howard looks like Chuck E Cheese with a Fedora in that pic

[@Cyclonus84]

AFter listening to this when I see a poor kid wearing that clothing I laugh. I saw one the other day and couldn't stop laughing. And his mom had a long skirt on too.

[@paulaharrisbaca4851]

A magical underwear!!! I love it. The Mormons wear magical undershirts too!

[@sphynxkittens5894]

I was born and raised in Lakewood, NJ, an Orthodox Jewish mecca. An early memory is of my mother and I approaching a stop light. We had to stop prematurely for a few Orthodox Jewish males. One younger male approached the driver's side and leaned into to window. He said "I just wanted to thank you for stopping and not running us over- are you free this Saturday?" Not hitting them translated to a possible conquest.

[@Sarah-zr1nj]

My husband (who is a secular Jew) was born and raised in Lakewood, so I absolutely, positively, 100% believe your story 😂

[@jeremy28135]

Are you saying he was hitting on your mother, or did was he inviting you and your mother to Shabbos service?

[@JeremiahKlarman]

Tzitzits 😂

[@paulaharrisbaca4851]

Hanging higher than Haman was a phrase. I never got it, but I guess Haman came to a bad end.

[@joshuatift4640]

Yes he was hung by the guilliotine that he prepared for Mordecai

[@SuperLordHawHaw]

@@joshuatift4640 You mean gallows

[@SuperLordHawHaw]

Imagine being hung up on some guy who may or may not have existed in an empire that no longer exists

[@daddius]

Funny enough, Julius Streicher called the Nuremberg trials Purimfest 1946. Like most things religion, it’s a bunch of fables masquerading as history.

[@nevillejudecharles3357]

And what's the deal with Rabbi's clearing their throats of phlegm everytime they pray???

[@JohnathanTwoTone]

It’s just difficult to not come to conclusion that they bring it on themselves when they’ve been in constant conflict for 5,000 years

[@rileyjacobs7652]

This is hilarious.

[@jefftedlow8910]

its so refreshing to hear a rant against religion that isn't afraid to discusJudaism. I'm not against Judaism. I'm against all organised religion, with the possible exception of Buddhism, which doesn't have an invisible man in the sky telling us what to do and watching everything that we do. I'm just tired of all of the political correctness that permeates all of the typical anti religion tirades which solely seem to focus on Christianity and Catholicism. The truth is that Judaism and Christianity really are not that different from one another except, to quote the late great George Carlin, "One prays to a different invisible man in the sky than the other." It really is just as repressive, as Howard so eloquently recounts. I think in the big picture.

[@SuperLordHawHaw]

You got it. Judaism shouldn't be above criticism, it is as ridiculous as any other.

[@Historian212]

You are mistaken, because most people who learn about religion from people who don’t know what they’re talking about - like George Carlin, like he knew anything about Judaism - claim there’s no difference between Judaism and Christianity (not to mention that there are variants among both those religions). There are many basic ideas that differ. For one thing, Christian believers think there’s such a thing as Original Sin - meaning that humans come out of the womb “stained” with sin. This belief developed a couple of centuries after the church started, and is not at all Jewish. And because of Original Sin, Christian believers condemn all non-Christians to hell. Which Jews do not. That’s just the beginning of a long list of differences. There. Now you know more about the subject than Carlin ever did. And as for poor, poor Christianity being so picked on: cry me a river. Stern’s an idiot about this subject. So was Carlin.

[@AlexWazHere]

​@@Historian212no one cares about your fairy tale, might as well debate stars and the galaxy far far away.

[@VSSFantastic]

@@AlexWazHere Exactly. Why even entertain this nonsense in the first place? Who cares if there are differences when both religions believe in an invisible man in the sky. Carlin saw right through that.

[@HermanIngram]

Islam is never mocked

[@tailormade3072]

He wasn't interested , that was his choice

[@michaelreidperry3256]

Stern gives an excellent example of religious trauma. Religion fucks great minds up. Traumatized? Get help. This is serious.

[@schmeltingaccident]

Quit yer bitching

[@roberttulibacki7332]

wow howard face looks like it melting.

[@jamesdean2987]

You're face looks frozen.💨💨

[@PineMartinAmerican]

+JamesDean55 You must be pretty young. Get used to it - people over 50 look like this, often. To younger people, it seems horrible to age - but to once older - life isn't so bad - in fact, often better. If you are fortunate, you will learn.

[@natalieps2387]

I was just gonna say that

[@BB-qk8on]

Hahahahaha Howard is hilarious

[@JL46L88]

Good aunt

[@thomcase1302]

Howard 'High guardian"

[@brucelk19]

hysterical

[@truthofdsp]

This is how he became angry white jew

[@missdisnerd_09]

...Tsviiiii!

[@desselbane4872]

Is Wiggy’s wig attached to the hat?

[@Qrqyt]

Hamantaschen is frickin delicious! And the filling is not prunes it’s poppy seeds.

[@arikmartin926]

Wow, fucking Aldous Huxley man

[@spok9180]

Self hating Jew, can’t blame him

[@mattsheezy5469]

It’s Sveee!

[@morrisdennis]

Religion is a control mechanism...

[@sardonicus76]

Go tell Veronica it’s time for Hanukkah.

[@nocontrol628]

Tsvi! Lmao

[@HighTide843]

Lmfao Tzvi is Hebrew for gazelle, how fitting😆😆

[@malcolmburns6104]

Damn. Howard looks worse than keith Richards in that picture.

[@buffalobigfoot7982]

I thought it was Elliott Offen.

[@damonwillis3672]

@@buffalobigfoot7982 He looks like the last shit I took riiiiight?!?!

[@JesseTheMindless]

He's wearing his 1964 riot hat.

[@BA-vv4jy]

You can thank Ralph Cirela.

[@esg8052]

wheres his skateboard

[@dpodemski]

Piggy Palladino Perry Caravello?

[@pianoman551000]

Is everyone Jewish on the Stern show other than Sal and Robin??

[@lawlaw1]

welcome to NY. my friend

[@pianoman551000]

@@lawlaw1 LOL! good one!

[@exanosis]

I think Fred is also not jewish

[@herschelsquirts2338]

BaBaBooey’s Italian

[@zhbvenkhoReload]

Well, when you are forced into going, you grow to detest it. Baptists are good at convincing their children to love their religion. I grew up Catholic and going to Saturday school and the Catechism was fucking horrible. Granted, it was not boring, but you had to wake up really early and still do homework for that apart from learning all the prayers and sitting down for our special mass. I hated it. And to think my Grandma's family decided to one day change from Judaism to Catholicism many, many years ago because they moved to Mexico. Now I live in the US and Catholic school here is worse-- you have to go thru 2 years half an hour but you have to stay for a lot of bogus "Retreats" in which they force parents to "donate" money.

[@witchculttoday3630]

Judaism is the only ethno-religion! In that, its the only religion that requires you to be genetically Jewish, and have Jewish lineage/blood. And also practicing Judaism. All Jews who can prove their blood bloodline are allowed "return to Israel and granted Israeli citizenship if they so choose. This is because despite where they were born or live, Jews only have loyalty to one nation- Israel! I hope you learned something (=

[@VerdeLane]

Omg, that pic is post nose job & other cosmetic surgery. Ha!

[@flutebasket4294]

That hat's a mistake

[@MEEG0L]

that face is too

[@flutebasket4294]

@@MEEG0L Indeed. In fact, his face is the primary reason why a hat, which might look great on another person, is a mistake on him

[@josephmarino3776]

Oh..i thought howard was ..only..Half Jewish..

[@pq_az]

אא שיין שטיק

[@HermanIngram]

No such thing

[@pq_az]

צְבִי! חח

[@kevinknight3599]

Looks like ralph

[@johnpatrick6998]

Wiggys daughter Emily is a Rabbi.

[@HermanIngram]

Not a real one

[@heyula07]

Pretty much same as islamic schools. That's one of the reasons why i am an atheist.

[@MisterJessel]

Tsvi

[@trentblume5998]

I don't think the NY Jews are the same as the ancient Hebrews.

[@_west33...]

Howard looks terrible.

[@morrisdennis]

I believe in God, Religion is stupid.

[@Gypseemann]

Howard should visit Palestine..n Israel N convince Sethanyahu to free the palestinian to fish openly n allow an airport to be built n have passports too. Ur sis didnt go to hebrew shool because of Haman

[@CesarManiaX]

Howard Stern should try Reform Judaism.

[@pq_az]

Reform Judaism ≠ Judaism