i'd love to love each moment

[@annao2059]

my private counsellor met me for the first time two days ago, and she told me something that really opened my eyes. she told me when you disassociate, it's your body's way of protecting itself. i have bad anxiety, and the body knows how painful and exhausting it is to constantly feel too much and in exchange coats everything in a gloopy numbing cream that makes everything blend into one. she said it was a coping mechanism, so before we can deal with the heaviness and unreality of living, you have to deal with the underlying emotion first. this is the only way i can picture feeling content the way i used to. x

[@doddlevloggle]

:)

[@annao2059]

doddlevloggle i love youuu!!

[@reinaswift8457]

Yes, I can add weight to this. Treating and processing the underlying trauma is necessary to relieving the condition ultimately. You do have to be present enough to bring the pieces back together and process them though, so in a way its a bit of a catch22. Thats why medication & talk therapy together is recommended for DP/DR, even better if you go into therapy aware of what could have set it off. Best of luck and hope you can get into therapy too

[@annao2059]

Reina Swift thank you so much! i’m currently on the right track to get the right therapist and it means a lot for you to respond. stay strong pal.

[@reinaswift8457]

Any time, I know its a rough and isolating experience. How long have you been in DP now and are you finding it easier to deal with? I've been in 1 year & 2 months, I'm still waiting for talk therapy to coincide with my meds in case I get a window in which to process, did you go private? sorry for all the questions, stay strong too :)

[@MadeleineOlivia]

"Wherever you go, there you are"

[@Laz-Kay]

You have no idea how comforting it is to know that I'm not the only one suffering from this shitty illness

[@user-lv9nt8fj7o]

Eeeeeeee I love you hi

[@yuripiIIed]

ᴍ ᴀ ɢ ɢ ɪ ᴇ nice profile picture

[@andreafanizza1238]

If you know and understand that your sadness comes from an imbalance of chemicals in your brain and you really want it to stop but you physically can't will it to, then you go onto anti-depressants to fixed the imbalance of chemicals. Anti-depressants often act as a temporary fix if you aren't mentally prepared to get better however if you are mentally prepared to fix yourself then often a 6 month course (that's all) can make you right as rain indefinitely. Ps the wonky side effects are incomparably small compared to depression. Show less REPLY

[@Pcwarmachine]

Maggie - How did you get your name like that? I am intrigued. :D

[@user-lv9nt8fj7o]

Googled Copy and paste font generator, typed in Maggie like "M a g g I e" with a space between each letter, then clicked my desired font, "small caps".

[@lucyandlila4726]

On rewiring brains: On the 18th I am going to hospital in London for 3 weeks. I will be there for intensive physiotherapy and regular therapy. I currently have a disease that means my nerves tell me that I'm in excruciating pain, that everything I touch is hurting me. The plan is that they will 'rewire' my brain to understand that nothing is hurting me, that my body is safe. The pain that I feel is real, but it is also not. I don't know if it will work. It's called desensitization training - training my body to not feel the pain by introducing it to new textures, temperatures and exercises. It will hurt an awful lot, and it will not make me better, but I'll be able to deal with the pain. It will teach me to cope and to work through the burning feeling under my skin, to not scream like I want to, but to tell myself that it's NOT REAL. Rewiring a brain is difficult. Whether it can ever fully happen is debatable. But, with help and a whole lotta hard work, you can at least learn to get through the problem and cone out the other side. There is no cure for my disease. There is no cure for depression. But, whoever you are, if you have read all of this, if you are scared that you will never recover from whatever you may be facing, please know that if you have no cure, no exit to your hell: you must fight your way out. You must fight through any pain you find, because there may be no exit but you can learn to at least stick your head out of the window and let the outside in. Good luck.

[@doddlevloggle]

oh my GOD that sounds awful. good fucking luck! you can do it! your brain can do it!!!!

[@lucyandlila4726]

doddlevloggle thank you so much! That actually means a lot. You've helped me through a lot of crap. But also, good fucking luck to you and your brain as well

[@pee8591]

good luck to you BOTH!

[@peppapigmememaster5772]

Dodie is the most relatable and beautiful human ever

[@ryanrusselreyes3684]

i fooking uhgree

[@JosieMason]

I know I love her!

[@ryanrusselreyes3684]

+Josie's Film Chats I love her tooooo

[@booksandcoffee5523]

THE HARRY POTTER QUOTE AT THE END IM SCREAMING- "be in my room making no noise and pretending I don't exist"

[@leilamarie5522]

YEsS!!! Happy #BackToHogwarts/nineteen years later!

[@ericaravenclaw4316]

Dodie is such an inspiration to me. One of the reasons she is, is because how open she is ❤

[@erin4230]

I had a day where I was really jet lagged and frustrated and I felt so... displaced. And I felt really de-personalised! This was the very first, and hopefully last, time I've experienced it, and it was honestly terrifying. I felt like there was a fog over my brain, like I had to shake my head and blink really hard to get it to go away, but it didn't until the next morning. Now I understand how you feel a little more, and I feel even more empathy for you now. It made me feel so tense and ... weird, like I'd never be normal again. Just thought I'd share, luv u dodie💓💓

[@eden-q2u]

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I MISSED YOUR VIDEOS OH GOD 💓

[@carolineirene3122]

+Ewa omg sameee i was complaining to my friends about how much i wanted dodie to upload lol. but im glad she took a break.

[@ronzzzie]

DAN SMITH IN YOUR PROFILE PICTURE >>>

[@eden-q2u]

yaas finally someone noticed it 😁

[@Julia-qx2fk]

I love your profile picture 😂

[@eden-q2u]

Ju lia przepraszam za stalkowanie konta ale jeju ktoś z polski pod filmikiem dodie + supernatural 💓

[@alice-st9pd]

dodie plz read this *_we all love you_*

[@astryiaa]

Pardon me, are you Aaron Burr sir!

[@emilybeckley921]

+

[@sabrinalocke2846]

I'm sorry you feel this way. I feel this way at times when I'm fed up with being alone, I want to go out in the world and have adventures every day, and making friends with people also. I'm sorry you still aren't feeling well. Maybe the dream you had when you were happy and pleasant maybe is trying to remind you that you can still feel that way. There must be a way! And I know you will get it! I would recommend doing something opposite when you feel bad. Do something that makes you feel good. I feel like that would help. :)

[@hadleylewis5125]

Sabrina Locke PREACH

[@Lara-tm2cj]

I had a dream that Dodes, me and one of my friends were together after going to her concert in the Button Factory where we ran around the streets of Dublin and danced with random buskers and made friends in the middle of the night and it was so natural and so freeing and it didn't matter that I got back to Uni and my scary mentor late the next day or that we didn't have phones and were worrying about us, it was just being, you know? Being alive and present and fulfilled. I've always wanted to just go anywhere like that, where no one knows me and do what I want with no repercussions - sing on the street, run on the rooftops, laugh and cry and feel a hint of anxiety, that adrenaline, that makes everything more real.

[@Laz-Kay]

Dp/dr is honestly the shittiest thing going! If you've never suffered from it you can't honestly say you understand what it is! It's the most horrible feeling in the world! Not feeling like you're actually here; feeling like you're dreaming all the time; feeling drunk all the time; not being able to enjoy yourself; always feeling spaced out. It's shit

[@AthAthanasius]

It's certainly *one* of the shittiest things, yes. I've briefly experienced de-realisation a few times, so I have a small window into what it would be like to suffer it chronically. My own experience with Avoidant Personalty Disorder, Generalised and Social Anxiety, plus the depression that goes with all of that, is no picnic either.

[@megcurl]

trying to consume lots of Dodie content (old and new) to feel like ive got a friend while I get through A Levels. Coming back to these old videos after a few years reminds me of being a young teenager again :)

[@iconiciconic5458]

Dodie I know you'll never see this, but you've helped me through so many things, you've helped me come to terms with my bisexuality in a homophobic household. With me in the closet and scared your videos make me feel safe and I can't thank you enough, dodie, thank you

[@riat9319]

Hi Dodie, I don't specifically suffer from depersonalisation, but I do deal with flatlined emotions (which is my form of depression) and anxiety. I've found that grounding myself in a moment and remembering a feeling helps. You don't have to remember the moment to try and recreate it, ground yourself in the moment so that your brain knows that being happy/joyful/excited is normal. The more you practice grounding yourself, the more normal it will become. I've suffered a lot of physical injuries, and my physiotherapist always asked me to think of my posture when I walked through a doorway. It seemed stupid to me, and it was hard to remember such a simple task, but now it's second nature and my body automatically adjusts. Sometimes our bodies (mental or physical) are stuck on autopilot but they're going to the wrong destination, so we have to take the wheel and steer it in the right direction before putting it on autopilot again.

[@taylorherbertson2004]

Brilliant!

[@DabblingEmmaDoc]

Ria Soames I think I've heard something similar to this...like when you're feeling sad or low or something you tend to look at the ground when you're walking about, the tip I heard is if you walk down the street look up and start counting chimneys or tv satellite dishes or similar. I do it from time to time (especially if I'm stressed or anxious) and even just for a little while it's a whole other perspective

[@riat9319]

DabblingEmmaDoc yes, that's a great tip! It's important to practice the little things, as hard as it is when you're depressed or dealing with depersonalisation or anxiety.

[@sidnee8047]

I AM HERE TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER DODIE AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING EXCEPT BE YOU

[@Ocean_Grove]

i thought manager josh was drinking out of a ketchup bottle

[@xylaardhiafiorina6844]

I thought the same thing! What is that, anyway?

[@katienicholls7319]

No but this just made me burst into laughter

[@itaroken]

omg leo!! i love your videos

[@charlottewhite9081]

me toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

[@elaina3295]

Me too!

[@melthatfangirl1533]

Ngl I quickly glanced at the screen when Josh was drinking and I thought it was a ketchup bottle omg

[@AthAthanasius]

Ah, not just me then.

[@Ray-yu2mc]

Melthatfangirl Same

[@juliathornton7842]

missed u

[@janak.9680]

that harmony at 4:22 killed me

[@zbrt]

holy shit thanks for reminding me that fun. exists, i had completely forgotten how much i loved their songs

[@HannahSnowArt]

CBT is great! Best of luck with it, it completely changed my life and has very much improved my way of thinking. Keep dreaming those content dreams 🍷

[@moonpixie33]

dude i swear no one talks about dpdr ever, its such an underrepresented illness and dodies explainations are so accurate. i got diagnosed like 5 years ago and its not hard to explain how i literally always feel like im stuck in thick mud CONSTANTLY. i never feel light or calm i just feel stuck. not even suffering just a stupid stupid place where im nothing at all im just like.. plodding - as dodie so rightly said. and whenever people give advice they always say "dont think about the feeling." "do things to ground yourself" "stay present in the moment" like thats so not how it works and people not understanding how it works and how much it really effects us is the most frustrating thing ever cos i just feel so.. helpless. and stuck.

[@ranveersoni3574]

What did u thought in that time

[@moonpixie33]

@@ranveersoni3574 what

[@ranveersoni3574]

What was ur fear

[@KatieTuttleKaatieMyLaady]

I wonder if it's because your brain was in R.E.M. And that's when your brain is calm and repairing itself, so like, it's a good thing that brain did that. I'm working on feeling content in the present moment as well, and my doctor told me that one way to help feel that way is to start acknowledging random and sometimes subconscious things. When I can remember to that, it starts to help a little. Like wow, that deep breath kinda made my chest collapse and my threat expand and that feels good. Or, wow the air feels cooler next to this tree and this fountain has that fountain smell that is always weirdly comforting because so many fountains smell like that. When I think about it too much it gets overwhelming but eventually it started to kind of do it's own thing and yeah Try it out. Idk Stay safe and sleep well while you're traveling 🌼🌻

[@doddlevloggle]

cute!

[@gemmawilliams7338]

I had a friend that suffers from anxiety, and the things that you go through. I didn't know how to help her but I wanted to so much so I told her to watch your videos. That was about 2 months ago. She has got so much more confident since she started watching your videos and you're the reason that we are so confident to be ourselves. We love you so much Dodie!!! ❤❤❤

[@IroGraonidou]

Dodie, you inspire me so much :) you're one of The reasons I still post my music on youtube even if I stay a small youtuber forever! Love you! You are The best ❤️

[@sethroy4318]

I find something that helps my depression (I don't have any experience with depersonalization, sorry) is *doing weird things.* Not _mountain-climbing_ necessarily, but things you haven't done or don't ordinarily do. And doing it without expectations. Without building up in your head how it's gonna be perfect. Just going in and going with it. This works even better if you have (as I have) a friend who'll just drag you off on an adventure or make you try something. Even just little things, like exploring a part of town you've never been to, or a new flavor can stop you thinking about your own thoughts and knock you back into the present moment. One more thing: it works better the fewer obligations, plans, and other mental/emotional baggage associated with it. That family holiday that's been planned months in advance is more likely to have expectations, stress (where's my toothbrush? we'll be late for our flight!) and any underlying tensions/unresolved issues you have with family members (even ones you aren't conscious of). A day trip to the countryside with a friend or two, a veggie platter, and a good record is much better. Or climbing on top of a building to look at the night sky. Just my little thoughts.

[@sarahj5161]

That sounds so nice!

[@hannah._.1592]

uh was that a cheeky harry potter reference in the end text???

[@doddleoddle]

YIS

[@hannah._.1592]

doddleoddle YIS

[@tmyers951]

Hannah Lewis OMG I'M A HARDCORE POTTERHEAD

[@charlottewhite9081]

I am literally re-reading Harry Potter and the philosopher's stone rn

[@elaina3295]

I never knew Dodie likes HP?!

[@priyahanspal6842]

ahh dodie I understand you so much. 15 and on anxiety meds. I hate the pain so fucking much, therapy helped, not as much as i wanted. I hope cbt helps you as it did with me. The weight may stay with you but i have found ways to lift it. I hope you can love yourself soon and keep sharing your story to help others xxxx

[@frecklesforties]

I just think you're awesome......as a 42 yr old woman who suffers from depression and anxiety I wish you could see that you have no need to feel the way you do and just grab every cool opportunity and don't worry about life and the crap that goes on because life goes quickly. I have so many regrets and I wish I'd been braver and if I knew what I know now I would have jumped right in there and gone for it without worry or fear.......its easy to say I know......I question everything still everyday but you're so talented and your thoughts are so special, so remember that. Go for it, chill out, enjoy the ride..... Xxx

[@mermaidsea50]

'enjoy the ride' well obviously at the moment she can't as she said she suffers from depersonalisation and feels depressed all the time and can't enjoy being in the moment.

[@frecklesforties]

Mermaid Sea as in......life itself! Enjoy yours X

[@mermaidsea50]

can't sorry have multiple mental illnesses xx

[@iris-dz5fc]

I always try to imagine how amazing it would be to go back to past before "x" happened, before everything changed, before this, before that. but I'm trying to accept the fact that I am not the same person as I was when I was 4, 9, 15, or even a year ago. We are bond to change, and it's almost impossible to be the person who you were before because there are elements in your life that changed you. and that's okay. I know it's hard, but accepting the fact that you're now a different person but still be able to love yourself, accept yourself, and validate yourself if you're going through a rough time, it's okay to feel out of place, depressed, anxious, etc. The same way you changed when you were younger, you will change the older you get and hopefully we can all look back and say "thank fuck i stayed alive to see this good side of life"

[@discoclauwn]

this is not related to this video at all, but dodie! i need the uke chords for in the middle.

[@xmeganpalmerx]

tabs.ultimate-guitar.com/d/dodie_clark/in_the_middle_ver2_ukulele_crd.htm I think these are right idk

[@roseo4498]

namjoon's rarely seen abs same you can probably look it up theres probably a KZbin tutorial

[@discoclauwn]

Music Madness aah thank you sm!!

[@xmeganpalmerx]

no problem ;)

[@yuripiIIed]

namjoon's rarely seen abs armyy ❤️

[@sepiasmith5065]

every once in a while I get a brief time of no anxiey/depression and it's. wild. honestly, you feel like you weigh so little and everything suddenly feels POSSIBLE and in those moments, I feel hope. because regularly, I'm almost sure it's impossible to truly get a healthy brain, but then those moments come and I think maybe I can get there, or at least a little closer someday.

[@Jade-jq8ry]

I know it sounds stupid her but vids make me feel grounded ,safe and not alone thank you doddie ❤

[@isabellasara784]

a way to live more in the moment is to focus on what you're doing (it works, just slowly, you get used to doing it more) it helps to focus on what's touching you, what you smell, what the weather feels like on your skin, what your toes feel like, basically checking in on all senses. i started doing this more last year and i've been able to live more in the moment so much and i highly suggest it's something you also do!!

[@madisonezell8721]

*i love you*

[@gisellerisu]

it's comforting yet incredibly sad that I know I am not alone and that I am not going mad and that other people go through these feelings and thoughts as well but I also wish that none of us would go through it. It's all a bit shit yet heartwarming

[@kelseynewman9000]

I love you Dodie 😍 xx

[@yuripiIIed]

Blackpink Jisoo nice profile picture:)

[@madeliefjulia418]

These kinda vids and reading comments of people who share the same struggles are so comforting. You're never alone.

[@ericaravenclaw4316]

It's so strange seeing her snapchats and that she's in America and then I watch her KZbin and she's not haha ❤

[@vaporrvvave]

Ukelele Unicorn I was JUST THINKING THAT

[@sage7104]

Ukelele Unicorn what is her Snapchat???

[@froge6652]

Just Meh it's just doddleoddle

[@bryrk]

I love the lighting in this video. It's not like super bright and white like a lot of people have but it's soft and gentle and comforting and a contenting coulor

[@thecakeissisley]

dodie singing along to some nights literally made my day when are we getting a cover

[@dexysworld]

Hi dodie, I have suffered with depression and depersonalization on and off for about five years now, and the thing that has helped me the most was learning mindfulness and meditation, with therapy and medication being second and third most helpful. Whenever I start to feel like I'm spiraling out o control of the way my brain is working, I try to sit down and be aware of those thoughts and challenge them. I don't indulge in the feeling, but I step away from it and look at it directly. It is then that I am able to really ground myself in the present and find joy in being alive. When I was first told to do this by my therapist, I felt as though my feelings were being invalidated, but the truth is, we really do have some control in how we feel, and what thoughts we choose to indulge in. We can't control what intrusive ideas pop into our heads, but we can choose not to dwell on them, and fight to make ourselves present and focus on the positive, with the help of therapy, medication, a good support network, and most of all, our own self discipline. I'm so glad you got on the waitlist for CBT, and I really hope it will help you feel the best you can feel. You're a wonderful human being and you don't deserve anything less than good health 💙

[@chamomiletea1286]

i don't know the drill or that bullshit. i know dODIE i love you a lot dodie, you're my idol. ((;

[@chamomiletea1286]

lmao please don't hate me

[@tala9553]

i started crying when you talked about how you felt content in your dream and wished you could find a way to feel like that in a conscious state; it really resonated with me. i understand how that feels, i've had nights where i've woken up from a dream that took place when i was a kid and i sit in bed for a while thinking about how i may have not really been happy, but i was content-- and i really wish i still felt like that. i've had days where i come home from school and i'll think about my childhood and start crying, not because it was bad, but because i wasn't anxious or sad. i'll think back to when i was a toddler and when my parents were still together and they were still happy too. and i actually feel bad saying that it's comforting to know you understand to some degree how i feel, because i would never want someone to have a similar mental state as me. but your videos talking about your mental health really make me feel so much better. they remind me that there are other people who face similar problems as i do and that i don't need to hate myself over my mental health because so many people fight through it too. and it's kind of silly that i'm writing this all out to you as if you were my pen pal, but how much you share makes me feel like that there's someone there to talk to. but i guess that's good because tricking myself into thinking someone's there is the only way i could write this much, and i guess there is someone there. someone's bound to read this and i'll be expressing how i feel to someone. i should just end by saying thank you. so that's what i'll do. thanks dodie.

[@rylees6079]

Love you so much Dodie xox

[@carlarosi8104]

The Harry Potter reference at the end killed me ❤ especially cuz September first and stuff... Happy 19 years later everyone!!!! Also, I really hope and believe that one day you'll reach that point of feeling contempt in the moment again and quitting worrying about unnecessary stuff, you're so strong and I believe that you can do it. Also I'm hating my life cuz you're gonna go to Australia and I just left... Oh well, have fun in the best country in the world anyway!!

[@rea_keebz]

dodie making a Harry Potter reference on Epilogue Day makes my life

[@rea_keebz]

"be in my room makingnonoiseandpretendingidon't exist" #19YearsLater

[@whoopp1746]

I know how it feels to be depressed and anxious, I have severe depression and moderate anxiety. I hope you have an outlet, through writing, singing (of course), anything. Just, you can get though this. We believe in you ♡

[@lernjergi4404]

Wouldn't we all?

[@sheerwonderland6468]

I just think it's so sad to see a friend be so lonely & unhappy. I'm so grateful that I can say I truly don't understand what it's like as I've never had any serious mental health problems. But my heart aches for the people like dodie who constantly hurt. Here's to the hearts that ache, here's to the mess we make ✨✨✨

[@doodlenoodledood3641]

Woo! Super early squad 💛💛

[@em7169]

i didnt get my dream role in a musical that i wanted so badly, and ive cried every day for nearly two weeks. i love when you talk about the realer, sad side of your brain because it makes me feel not alone and less ridiculous when i have bad brain days.

[@eraddication]

That Harry Potter ref at the end tho....😄😄😄 Hope you're feeling well Dodie! Love you!

[@eraddication]

Jas There's a writing in the end and she says *I'll "probably" be in my room making no noise and pretending I don't exist*

[@msfearliss]

In regards to mindfulness, I get what you mean about how having your eyes closed fucks you up. I have a hard time with that too cause I find I get dizzy, which triggers panic attacks. So maybe try like lightly focusing on something in the general area or just focus on how your body feels, on your breath? It sometimes helps me when I'm having a bad panic attack and trying to bring myself back to the moment to stop the negative brain cycle.

[@awesomekidmsp2678]

Hi Dodie!!! ❤️

[@ashz3603]

I feel the same way a lot. Most of the time I feel sad and alone and i can’t let go of what happened in the past and I’m a mess. But sometimes, I get this feeling, a feeling so familiar to me, because it’s just how I used to feel. And in those moments when everything seems okay, i’m okay. i think that it’s the things that create those little moments of happiness that we need to hold on to.

[@ericaravenclaw4316]

5:00 omg I thought he was drinking ketchup 😂😂

[@AthAthanasius]

... or hot sauce ....

[@trefli_truffles]

I find it helps on nice days with some clouds, just to lay down somewhere and just watch the clouds go by, not forcing yourself to feel anything or think anything. Just relaxing without pressure and letting your worries float away

[@laiah.chinelle]

When u said it was September i was actually shocked because i realized that my birthday 6 days away🌻

[@jessszzz6433]

Laiah Clay happy b-day in 6 days lol 😂

[@liadhpyburn1979]

CBT was so amazing for me, it brought me a drop of clarity every now and again. And that's revolutionary

[@estellefoxmusic]

If you find out how to rewire your brain, Plz spill because I'd much enjoy

[@disconcertedrave]

EstelleFoxy First, if you can, find a good therapist. If you are seeing one that you're not sure about, find a new one and only stick with them if you're sure that they are helping you. There are a lot of shitty therapists so you have to shop around but there are also a lot of really good ones. Make sure you tell your therapist what you want to work on and that you are on the same page. You also have to put the work in to see progress. Second, you have to be dedicated to getting better and putting in the work. Your not going to get anywhere if your half-assing things. I'm not going to lie to you, you're going to have to work your butt off and it's going to be hard. But it is doable and it is worth it. I wish you the best! 💗

[@estellefoxmusic]

DisconcertedRavenclaw thanks lots

[@taylorherbertson2004]

To add to this, you also have to practice. You have to literally forge a new path in your mind and so you just have to learn how to think helpfully (which is where a therapist comes in handy) and then just constantly practice this until it eventually becomes second nature

[@Dabestest-uo4bg]

I've heard hypnotism has help some people

[@marialyn5212]

I've tried therapy, meds and even been hooked up to actual wires designed to reward your brain for therapeutic brain waves but nothing seems to help I am constantly be wrung out by my anxiety and I feel there is no help

[@EmilyCrescent]

I've been going through a stage of depression recently and just repeat these words over and over and it actually begins to work! : "I am happy right now"

[@sophiescreativenessness2761]

Does anyone know if dodies coming to New Zealand on her tour?

[@helenebazblack]

Sophie's Creativenessness It's just a uk tour

[@sophiescreativenessness2761]

writing to fight oh okay thankyou

[@regina430]

Sophie's Creativenessness aww ikr I wish she would come to NZ too

[@camillepeterson8778]

Ahhh I WISH!!!!!!

[@lilypedelty]

my therapist always says "never should on yourself" aka don't get down on yourself for something you THINK should happen or you think you should be. life and recovery are both crazy rides that never go in a straight line. i've been in recovery for over two years now and I'm no where near the end. just keep working everyday on rewiring your negative thoughts and your negative thought distortions. it takes time and still have multiple thought distortions every day. really my only advice is that it takes constant work and a lot of time but it's worth it to be happy. good luck in your recovery and your therapies.

[@sbbs3534]

Hey can you cover songs by kodaline? A few suggestions are all I want, high hopes, love like this, talk, brother

[@PlayitAgain16]

AnIndianGirl oh gosh high hopes would be amazing!!

[@AudreyisBatman]

the way you explain things hits so close to my heart. I just started university, and I was counting on it to fix me, but I still just feel distant and hazy. I'm trying to be content in the present moment, but it feels nearly impossible. thank you for this.

[@peppapigmememaster5772]

I love you sm

[@rosemarynelson1829]

my favorite cb therapist i've ever had moved away last year and i miss her everyday. she always recommended TEDtalks and vlogbrothers videos to me and she was just generally so fantastic with me and my brain. i hope you have the same experience ((or something similar bc i very much hope your doctor doesn't move offices)) ANYWAYS i love you so much xoxo

[@stefguzman1546]

woah this is the first time i'm actually early to a video

[@georgiesunter3261]

You should be so proud of how you keep going, even when you're not doing well mentally. You really are an inspiration to so many of your fans

[@SamanthaSchucker]

whoever is reading this, know that you are loved, you are accepted, you are intelligent, you are worth it, and you are enough.❤

[@ethanisaac01]

Samantha Schucker this deserves to be at the top of the comments so everyone can see this! also you can take from this too because I suppose seeing so many people reading and liking it is your way of spreading happiness which in turn makes you happy!

[@mermaidsea50]

well no, i am not accepted, i have been excluded from everything since I was 5, and I am not loved. Everyone hates me.

[@lily-pk9ws]

Mermaid Sea then let me get to know you. The only people I don't like not even hate is the right word because I still give them chances is my bullies. Yes not everybody may like you but give me a chance my best friend has gone through this before and it takes a while to get through but give me a social media or something to talk to you through so I can show you I care. To many people I loved have died and it took a toll on me and I realised I need to help other people so their family doesn't have to go through what I did. Give me a chance to help you and show you I care please just let me show you before you end up doing something you regret and then I regret not helping you

[@tijl.c7393]

Your dreams sound like they're lifelike and are more like memories, All I dream about is being hunted, chased or just threatened

[@Grace-ph7xy]

RiP I can't go to playlist live

[@lyric6719]

Grace same :(((

[@roseo4498]

Grace well I live near DC so I'ma bout to look into it

[@misosouphere6074]

+Alberto Droguett holy cheese! are you ok?

[@isabelaexists3480]

MiSO SOUP HERE *_O H H E L L O_*

[@ladyloyalroyal143]

I get weirdly INFINITELY excited when Dodie makes a video like I'm seeing my twin for the first time in 72 years

[@emmaj44431]

Let's get married

[@Louisyed]

Emma October from Sunshine on Leith? 😃

[@Louisyed]

Emma October I'm too uncool, it's a song from the musical

[@lornatw]

Sometimes things just change one day on their own and you think that's a miracle but then the bad place catches up and that's hard to accept without falling behind a smokey screen again. We have to live for the good moments and spend a balanced amount of time distracted from, then on par with reality.

[@ellab-g1746]

Last time I was this early the uk was still in the European Union

[@travsvocalchords]

Ughhhh, I can't get over the fact that ur use of language is so beautiful and sophisticated no matter what the circumstance 😍😍

[@booksandcoffee5523]

Dodie if you do decide to run away from life and become a hippie feel free to stop in Canada and stay at my place for a while. Tbh I think most of ur subscribers wouldn't mind if you dropped by and took a night at there house lolol

[@booksandcoffee5523]

*their

[@chloelekervelec8933]

I too feel like this with my depression and stuff but my way to go since not so long ago is that I just focus on the positive, let go of the negative, don't look back or too forward and don't let negative thoughts get in the way of my potential happiness cause it's a waste of time and energy when I could be doing anything that makes me a little happier. I guess part of feeling better is training your brain to think he is already on his way. Anyway, love you Dodie♥

[@emmabrier6304]

Dodie. My heart breaks seeing you in your mental state and seeing the discontentment that comes hand in hand with your depersonalisation. I'm not here to tell you a story and I know that this small jumble of letters constructed on a computer screen may be hidden in the abyss of comforting messages but what I want you to know is this. In the galaxy there is a tiny solar system that is home to 8 planets and only one (that we know of) holds life and that life is more commonly known as the human race. Our race isn't exactly perfect, there is discrimination and war and conflict and more tragically, there is sadness. Sadness comes in many forms such as grief and heart break, depression and anxiety and the feeling when you are in one place but your brain is off somewhere else. However, amidst the sorrow and sadness comes hope and life and love. These three things can be found in everything you just know where to look and I'm sorry dodie my darling but you might have lost your glasses. The glasses that help you to ground yourself with your body and the glasses that once they are on you can see the worlds beauty without having to look and squint your eyes because as we all know squinting hurts after a while and you don't deserve to be in pain dodie. I've been watching you for 3 and a half years and watching you battle depression and depersonalisation shows me that life isn't always perfect but we should never pretend it is. We should strive to find the glasses that show us that being ourself is what makes this small planet amazing. So dodie, wherever you go, whether a shop or a park, look around and find 5 things that are beautiful about your surroundings and hopefully you will feel very slightly more in your body and well practice makes perfect so do it everywhere and I mean everywhere.. your bathroom or even under a grimey old underpass but just remember dodie that we (your followers/friends) are honestly here to guide you and help you through anything. I love you ❤️

[@anatoenaiomiarancibia2044]

I hope you find the tools to get pass this illness and start fully experiencing things. You deserve a life full of love and good things Dodie, ily 💛💛💛

[@isla5669]

you're teeth are so beautiful like how the hell,, this is my 3rd year of braces and i'm only 13,,,

[@lordvoldemort7855]

isla I'm about to be on my third year of braces and I'm 14

[@taylor3785]

isla I had braces for 5 years, I'm 13 I just got them off 2 months ago

[@rosieglover4980]

This is incredibly relatable. But you are so amazing Dodie! My favourite quote to feel a little less crap is "Everyone wants happiness nobody wants pain, but you can't have a rainbow without a little rain" 😊😚🌈🌈

[@moonithmondays7840]

Me me BIG boy 😉

[@inayat8100]

Moonith Monday's ayeee whatdup squad fam

[@inayat8100]

Julianna P oooops

[@JosieMason]

ayyyyyy famsquad

[@takashi8774]

it's weird it's comforting to know that other people feel this way

[@aleelikestiedye5839]

I'm going to my first pride tomorrow.🌈🌈🌈

[@ediedavies2083]

Happy thoughts is the perfect way to explain it. You can't get over it, obviously, but all you have to do is hope. Run away for a while. We all need to do that. See your fans and your friends, we all are with you and you can be content in the present. You help other people like me, so I want to help you. Thank you Dodie xxx

[@misterbowlerhat]

DODIE! Your sign in the background is spelt wrong - it says " happy thougts" but it should be "happy thoughts" :/ (soz for the tangent lol)

[@albaroman2093]

Reuben at the intro of the video there's like this 1sec text that says that she only got two h with the product

[@misterbowlerhat]

Oh yeah so it does ;)

[@rheabell8182]

It feels nice for we to talk about we dp because it makes me feel not alone in having this horrid disease. I love listening to the way she describes it because I had described it the same way my entire life and I've gotten 'just a phase' or 'you'll grow out of it' or 'it's just an out of body experience' or 'it's nothing' and it's just so comforting and warming to know that it's an actual disease I can work through. Ily dodie!!!

[@AwkwardActress]

Dodie I love you but thoughts*

[@AwkwardActress]

😂💕

[@TiCarmie]

Kaya Donah I think there were not enough space ! 😂

[@rea_keebz]

There were only 2 H's in the pack she got (watch the very beginning of the vid again)

[@AwkwardActress]

Rea Keebz ohhh okay

[@mermaidsea50]

she got it half price cos of the missing H

[@taiyucky4397]

she's probably got the most comforting voice out of,,,, everyone

[@frostedjosieos]

I love how Josh laughed at the question and then genuinely answered it

[@rebeccabethx6700]

Hey Dodie, I suffer from SAD-type depression and one thing that has made a MASSIVE difference to me has been going to the gym/ cycling more and trying to eat healthy (for me, that has been avoiding sugar and dairy haha). It's incredible how much getting fitter has improved my mood and I would really recommend it!

[@Naomi-cv1qo]

I always feel the sudden Urge to hug Dodie when she talks about the fact she's struggling a bit. Keep strong, Gal x

[@hazuki_music]

Honestly, without trying to sound too cheesy, seeing you go through all of this, and have time to document it and edit it to viewable level, is so inspirational for someone who does suffer with mental health issues and is trying to make it through and make it. Starting 2nd year of uni in 2 weeks and I'm nervous because 1st year was a bit shit but seeing you achieve all of this, despite your dpd stuff just makes me feel like I can tackle anything. That I can beat this thing trying to takeover my brain, but even if I can't, I can still make #art and do what I love. Thank you :)

[@hannahhomocideXOXO]

I totally understand you not posting everyday and that life happens which makes posting something low on your priority list. You are a very resilient, intelligent, and capable human and I trust that when you're on hiatus it's because you need to be. Glad you're back for now Dodie!! 💕

[@danchvrs7252]

i'm actually so grateful to have you on this planet