I Just Need To Talk (Some TMI)

I realized that the 'fat lip' portion of the video was part of the corrupted file. In short: I was intubated for surgery and the tube always lays on one side of your mouth. For me, they chose my left. Why is it always my left? My lip on my left side did that thing where it gets tucked under your teeth. When you're conscious, you think, 'well this looks silly' - untuck it and go drink more water because ya mouth is dry. When you're unconscious and under anesthesia, you do nothing because you're asleep. It just chills there for the duration of the surgery. In my case, not only did it chill there but the pressure of the tube was rubbing all up on it the duration of the surgery. I kept telling nurses and my husband that my lip felt weird and slightly numb, they assured me it was fine, I went to the bathroom and saw that my upper lip was 3x bigger on the left than on the right. I joked that they should have switched sides midway through to give me an even job.

[@jennamarie7966]

When you explained people being shocked that you eat cake, that was such a hard relate for me. I've had people react very confused seeing me eat and snack on anything. I forgot we were supposed to only drink blood

[@angelabenedict]

That's the most perplexing one! The eating thing cracks me up.

[@Dalthos2]

Wishing you the best of luck on the next stage. I hope it works out.

[@angelabenedict]

Thank you!

[@pal19999]

I hope everything goes well for you 🖤 I know you're going to be an amazing mother

[@angelabenedict]

Thank you so much for the well wishes 🖤🖤🖤

[@MikeyV]

Very happy for you Goth queen 🖤

[@angelabenedict]

Thank you!

[@user-ng9pn9lg2p]

Best wishes for the next stage of your baby journey!

[@henryhayth3303]

First off, I wish you the best of luck with the next stage of IVF. Second, I DEFINITELY feel different from other people, and not just because of being part of the "Sad Person" Goth/Alternative Subculture. I'm definitely neurodivergent, to say the least here. My family was also WAY different from the families of the people I went to school with. Honestly, up until about four years ago, I didn't seem to belong anywhere because I didn't relate to much of anyone at the time, including my own family. At times, I honestly wonder if I'm better than most, or a part of the regression of the human race. I don't think that it's particularly bad to think that way on its own. I think it's more common than you may think.

[@-RONNIE]

You can put whatever you want on here we will listen & support you. I think everyone needs to get it out & vent every once in awhile. I really & truly do hope everything works out for you.

[@omarjimenez8895]

1:50 When my father first started becoming a speaker at our church, or kingdom hall technically, he was very nervous and gave low energy wooden performances. A friend said to relax and incorporate more hand gestures Next talk my father mentioned God in the first 30 seconds and pointed up. He kept his hand up even after moving on. He's still talking and his hand is still up. Point after point and his hand is still up. Said friend started cringing from second hand embarrassment and went to the bathroom to take a break. He came out only to see my father's hand still pointing up. Sweating, speaking softly, and lips trembling but still pointing up the whole time. He finally finishes his speech and walks off the stage still pointing up. Sits down, the next speaker comes up and says "thank you, you can put your hand down now". My father looks at his arm only just now realizing it's been up the whole time, puts it down and dies from embarrassment. Love the texts and other effects you've been using in your videos. Wouldn't have thought about my dad's story if it wasn't there 😂

[@angelabenedict]

I was cracking up through that whole story! Your poor dad lol. Makes for a memorable speech, though!

[@wolfiethedog76]

Are you a Jehovah's witness? Just curious....

[@omarjimenez8895]

@@wolfiethedog76 yes

[@NickNightfall1711]

Wishing you all the best, Angela! I really hope things work out for you. 🙂

[@angelabenedict]

I hope so too! Thank you!!

[@NickNightfall1711]

@@angelabenedict you're welcome! 🙂

[@samxsara]

Yeah we support you Angela ❤

[@stephaniemcdowell1010]

I'm glad someone else has the experience of being laid down on a surgery table that looks like a cross and is talking about it. When I had surgery and had to do the same thing, right before I knocked out all I remember saying is "wow, I feel like I'm about to be crucified". It was probably either very awkward for the operating room staff or they probably hear it all the time. lol I wish you all the luck with your IVF baby journey! You're going to be the best goth mom! 🖤

[@LittleMissDeath]

I had a botched c-section in 2022. My daughter is fine but it left me very traumatized, but not in the way I expected to be. I don't feel fear anymore except when I'm in any medical setting and my pain tolerance has shot up to superhuman levels. It's getting to the point where I need to talk to my doctor about prescribing me something for the medical related anxiety... which requires me to be in a medical setting! I'm to the point where I force myself to disassociate to get through any and all medical appointments, otherwise I wouldn't allow anyone in a white coat near me.

[@festivalkyrie]

Oh, the feeling of mistrust is so hard to fight, especially that it makes you set on a triggerpoint all the time, and it's so tiring. Glad to hear that you were able to go through the surgery 🖤🖤

[@aspookyspookynight]

Yay an angela video!

[@janiebrossmann1178]

I send you love hugs and prayers ❤️🙏 take care of yourself 💞

[@thehealthanarchist]

Ahaha the cat on the vacuum cleaner 😂😂. Thanks for sharing , i think its really nice that a lot of us in the KZbin Goth/Alternative community share our struggles and journeys, I think it really helps others going through their own things in life. Fingers crossed and the very best of luck to you both 🖤🖤🦇🦇

[@kindnessfirstandlove2192]

Oooooh Angela….I know you are really a stranger to me, and I to you, but I’ve been following you for years and feel I can directly relate to the parts of yourself you share in so many ways. We’re about the same age, so I understand and empathize with you on a generational level, I’m very much an anxiety-ridden, can’t-make-a-decision-for-my-life- Libra. I have childhood trauma and struggle with diagnosed OCD, several anxiety disorders including social anxiety, body dysmorphia, ED, and ADHD. I’ve been a goth since high school (I don’t always dress in the aesthetic associated with it, but the music is forever intertwined with my soul), I’m the wayward black sheep who has been sort of “othered,” I relate to everything you’ve discussed about your spiritual beliefs, and I love to cook and bake. Although I’m blessed with an amazing daughter, she is now 19 and I desperately want to experience motherhood again under circumstances that aren’t toxic as they were back then with her father. All this to say, there is a part of me that (I don’t mean this in any freaky or creepy kind of way!!!) that I feel if we had ever crossed paths, we might’ve become friends. I realize that might sound presumptuous and maybe it is, I don’t mean it in any ill kind of way. I’ve become emotionally invested in this journey of yours. I mean, in all the ways I relate, I can empathize. I am really rooting for you!! You’ve been through so much. I am truly wishing you all the very best. I know you’ve been wanting this for so long. I’ll send out good energy and vibes and light candles of protection and success for you (only with your permission will you receive what I put out, of always and of course!) Please take care of yourself, REALLY put yourself first. Being so concerned about the eggs are your maternal instincts in action! Prioritize yourself in order to keep your cup filled and overflowing so you have enough to abundantly give without draining yourself. You WILL be an amazing mother. Not to jinx, but to speak it upon you and into existence in your life. I know you have generational curses to break, and you have the wisdom to do so. You got this. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability, you have subscribers who really feel less alone. Those of us struggling with fertility can really benefit from your honesty. Maybe you won’t read this, but if it comes across someone who needs to read this- know that there are strangers out there, against conventional wisdom, who actually care about you and wish you beautiful outcomes in life. I really feel hopeful for you!!!! May you be blessed with a fruitful, successful retrieval AND successful, healthy pregnancy, birth, and beyond. Thanks for everything you’ve shared over the years💖🦇🖤🪬🧿🌛🌹🌸🌼🌻 Edited for grammar. Probably could have fixed more lol

[@thebattybosnian]

Good luck 🖤 I have a feeling things will work out for you! You got this!

[@Greylien0]

Woooooo, go Angela!! I've been watchin ya for about 5 years now, and am so glad to hear this is going well for you!! I'm sending good vibes and prayers for your fam! 💜

[@tulipsalinger1410]

GEEZE! hospitals and not having all the control of myself makes me very anxious, you were very brave!

[@jessicakelly1418]

Congratulations. And that feeling to protect those precious cells you will feel for the rest of your life. Prayers that you and your husband are successful in this wonderful endeavor ❤

[@katismysecondname5152]

Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with us. I wish the best for you and your husband.

[@Midevil1]

I was more concerned that i might talk under anesthesia...😉😁

[@angelabenedict]

When I woke up with the fat lip after surgery I was convinced that I had talked and said something that pissed someone off and they decked me lol. All the other times I've had surgery, I woken up speaking.

[@lasantuzza777]

omg that’s my biggest fear. when i got my wisdom teeth out i know i must’ve been saying something cuz all the nurses were very amused with me after, smiling and thought i was the funniest person ever. before that they were more clinical / professional so clearly something changed lol. i can only imagine the tmi stuff i shared🫢🤐 the next day i saw i had posted like 20 videos on snap chat of me in the car on the way home and every one was me saying to my husband, “thank you. you’re my best friend. thank you for driving me. i love you” over and over in a very groggy voice 😂

[@Midevil1]

@@angelabenedict The whole idea of anesthesia is just FREAKY! You remember a room but you don't remember falling asleep in it, and you wake up in an entirely different room... actually that sounds a bit like "college"....🤔😁

[@Vintagewitchstyle]

I’m proud of you! You’re going for what you want despite being scared. I know that trauma brain doesn’t always make sense. That’s why self sabotage is a real thing. I know firsthand. I have cptsd and anxiety thanks to my ex husband. I also have acid reflux. It’s terrible. I have bad fibroids. I was pleasantly surprised at how uneventful pregnancy was for me. I have two girls in middle school now. My gynecologist is basically recommending I get a hysterectomy. I’m in my late forties and single. I’ve come a long way in my trauma recovery, but I think it’s an ongoing process. I wish you and your husband all the best in this journey. 🙏🏻

[@melrock06]

Great vid 🖤

[@angelabenedict]

Glad you enjoyed

[@themoonflowerfaerie]

You are such a strong person, even though you may not feel that way. I know this means a lot to you, and wishing you all the best for your dreams to come true. Much love sweetie 💜🦇

[@angelabenedict]

Thank you, that really means a lot to me. It's been a rough few months!

[@shayleeB]

Wishing you the best in healing and future steps in this process ❤ love from KC

[@Mickieshelton]

You want to talk? Thats great... because youre easy to listen to.

[@angelabenedict]

You are very sweet. 🖤🖤🖤

[@SingBlueSilver-m7t]

Oh, I feel you on this. I find going under for surgery to be terrifying as well due to chronic health issues (and trauma) that make surgery very risky. I'm facing another surgery in a few months and it's wreaking havoc on my brain, especially since they don't know what's causing my current health problem yet. So glad your procedure went well.

[@gingeraiyle]

I'm so happy for you being able to get through all those steps and just will yourself through the process even despite the mishap with the one nurse. So far it sounds like good news and I'll keep hoping for it to stay that way! I have never been through IVF, but my daughter was 13 weeks premature so when you mentioned calling and checking on a "bundle of cells" in my head I just equated it in a way to all the times I'd wake up in a panic and call the NICU to check on her. At least as far as the anxiety surrounding it goes I can understand that. I'm wishing you and your husband the absolute best of luck in getting to live out this part of life you've always wanted, and I'm proud of how strong you have been and continue to be through this process. 🖤🖤🖤

[@konstantine3276]

Best wishes to you on this endeavor of yours, Aunt Angie. I'm sure Uncle Stu provides the support needed for you

[@angelabenedict]

Thank you 🖤🖤🖤

[@konstantine3276]

@@angelabenedict your welcome

[@mrsmetalhead666]

I cannot imagine the stress you and your husband are under, you are very brave, i wish you are the luck in the world x🖤

[@maevebelladona]

Having trauma you don't trust anybody.. exactly. Her saying this made wanna cry cause no one really understands and people make feel like a weirdo for not trusting others so easily.

[@NickNightfall1711]

I just wanted to say that I understand and don't think you're weird at all. I hope things get easier for you.

[@ashely3789]

I have trauma....and I'm scheduled for a colonoscopy and endoscopy on Thursday and the anxiety is unreallllll just thinking about it. 😫 I really hope everything goes well for you moving forward and level up to the next phase 💜

[@klarenee1123]

I had my first colonoscopy in 9 years yesterday (I have Crohn’s disease so it’s a semi regular necessary evil for me) and my reason for waiting so long to schedule one was severe medical trauma, so I can def relate to the feelings you’re having right now . I mean, I also had *additional* very valid reasons for my fears about this specific procedure, not least of all being that the testing I had prior to the procedure was indicating something might be really wrong. The last few weeks have been utter hell w what cPTSD has put me thru😓 I thought I was being super slick with my care team yesterday trying to act cool, calm and collected, but thanks to the heart monitor reading my resting bpm at a solid and steady 100bpm, I wasn’t fooling anyone lol… The body really do be keeping the score. Just wanted to let you know you’re not alone in how you’re feeling and from someone who’s been thru more of these procedures than I can count, 9x’s out of 10 they go off without a hitch and truly the worst of it is the prep😅🥴 I’m sending you every bit of peace and tranquility I can bear to part with and some extra after that too. And also love and best case scenario results. Whatever that looks like for you. I know I’m just a stranger in the comment section on KZbin but I am now super invested in your well-being and will be thinking of you over the next 48 hrs and wishing you the very best. If you think about it come back and lmk how it goes(:

[@ashely3789]

​@@klarenee1123thank you so much for your very thoughtful and validating response. I'm really touched 💜 I'm doing my best to rally my nerves today and not get too into my own head. I've only had one colonoscopy about 7 years ago, the procedure itself was fine, but afterwards I felt very messed up in the head and very panicky and it felt like some sort of switch was flipped in my brain..I'm trying to tell myself the more calm and accepting I go into the experience the more likely I will walk out that way too. It's so hard to keep my anxiety under control because I just overthink and ruminate to death. 😅😅 The hospital just called me to do my check in and that person was very nice and even a little funny too, so starting off on a good note. 7 am tomorrow! And hopefully everything is fine. Thank you again 💜

[@klarenee1123]

@@ashely3789 of course!! Oh my gosh, the post op/post procedure anesthesia feeling of dissociation and/or existential dread is SO real! It doesn’t necessarily happen every time w the same intensity, but I find just knowing that it’s a thing and that it will pass helps tremendously toward talking oneself off the proverbial cliff for lack of a better analogy🥴🤦🏻‍♀️ Just know that it’s really normal for your brain to go thru a bit of a crisis post anesthesia just attempting to reconcile the chemicals it’s trying to filter out and also that your consciousness was literally switched off for a period of time. That is WEIRD!! lol and is a very bizarre thing to try to process. If you like/get a good vibe from your anesthesiologist in the morning tell them what happened last time and they may be able to adjust the medication or give you something different to help it feel less jarring and dreadful to like, exist upon waking😅🥴 On another note, I think it’s a great sign that the person on the phone that triaged you was in good spirits and gave you some comfort. Especially that they made you laugh(: To me it’s a good indicator that it’s a happy work environment and that always makes for a better patient experience. It’s ok to be anxious and I find the less I fight the feeling the more in control I feel. Like, at least me and this bish Anxiety are in it together. I know it’s just trying to keep me safe but it needs to know its place and not get carried away🤣🤣 easier said than done to _put it_ in its place sometimes, but you get what I’m saying right? I’ll stop rambling now lol.. must still be processing a bit of anesthesia myself🥴🤦🏻‍♀️ I really will be sending peace, tranquility and healing vibes to you tomorrow! You got this💜

[@ashely3789]

​@@klarenee1123 you're so sweet 💜 your ramble had a lot of good points in it and I will try my best to remember them/be mindful of those facts! Thank you for your calming energy ✨ I really appreciate you taking the time to reach out to a stranger!

[@klarenee1123]

@@ashely3789 I hope everything went super well and that you have the best, most snuggly nap day of your life(:💜

[@andrewmacias]

I so happy for you Angela and hope all goes smoothly

[@teeprice7499]

Hugs. I hope things get better for you very soon.

[@RoseGlass123]

Thank you for sharing this. I can relate to a lot and my heart goes out to you. I truly hope you get to be a mother soon, and I wish you a speedy recovery and great news from the doctors :)

[@Sanniz]

Strange that she sat the needle that bad. They are usually the better ones to place them well. But I am happy you did it and I hope everything works to a loved result you wish for. I do recognize the things around a surgery. Had one September 2023. And the standard was walking to this type too. That gives more oxygene in the system and helps during a surgery. Even I had to trust the progress to be strapped to the surgery table. Very strange feeling. And agree that we are not that different to others either. We are not super heroes, cause we are goths. I cross fingers for the 4 ones. That it will work. Stay safe gorgeous Angela 🦇🖤🖤🖤🖤🦇

[@GhouliatheGhost]

5:55 You're very brave! I would have been apprehensive and bolted.

[@dust17111]

It's Gemini season girlie , it's all good vent it !

[@angelabenedict]

I am feeling the season. Gemini's are not for the faint hearted.

[@dust17111]

@@angelabenedict they definitely aren't , Gemini, Scorpio and me Aries we tend to get a bad wrap , understandably so , we can be too much for some ! 😜🤟♈

[@kindnessfirstandlove2192]

@@dust17111Oh I know I’m not Angela, but had to jump in to say this season going tough! Lol I always feel for the signs who get a bad rep- I think many people only mean to tease certain signs good-naturedly, but I also think many people who really believe the bad hype don’t have a thorough understanding of the complexity of natal charts! Haha, I mean generalities exist to a degree for good reason, and of course there is something to be said for some energies that just don’t get along to an interesting proportion, but man I love me some gems, scorpios, and rams! I think it’s the harder characteristics of these signs that people are talking about, but when they are exalted, there is so much awesomeness!! But yeah, maybe too much for some people lol Anyway, I went off didn’t I? I guess it’s just the season to communicate, and maybe I’m overdoing it lol Hope you’re keeping that throat chakra clear and hydrated this season! 🪬💖 ♊️

[@dust17111]

@@kindnessfirstandlove2192 love that you went off ! Love your energy! Your awesome! Yeah how I look at it is generally Gemini, ♏ and us rams can be too much but every sign can be dark sided or toxic , funny thing is since I've been studying astrology seriously for the past three years I've noticed when someone says they feel they aren't there sun sign most often that person is acting like the opposite so for example to make it short tangent lol if Aries is toxic we become lazy and indecisive like a Libra , libras when dark sided lash out suddenly like a unhinged Aries . But of course we have the whole birthchart to take into account and what not , cool to see another person into astrology that's also a fan of Angela and goth lifestyle ! Cheers !

[@kindnessfirstandlove2192]

Aw thanks!! Love your energy, too!! lol, “lazy and indecisive like a Libra” (I’m a Libra lol) but it’s true that can be a toxic side when we are swinging the other way too far. And I find that I can relate to to the opposite sign phenomenon as well- if I am swinging too far the other way and am imbalanced, I can take on the traits that would be the more toxic Aries traits, totally agree that’s an interesting consideration! Our opposite signs’ toxic traits should be examined for self reflection for sure! Love that you said that! Interesting you say that about people “not feeling their sun sign”- I agree with what you say about all that. I’ve noticed another interesting thing where (only anecdotally to people I’ve asked, but not like a serious survey), but I’ve noticed that the phase of psychological development people are going through can have an impact- like teenagers and people finding their identity/ego development might feel drawn to their opposite sign, as you said, as well as I’ve noticed their rising sign seems to be of importance, which makes total sense, astrologically, especially since teenagedon is a vital time for how things appear on a surface level (I don’t mean that in an insulting way, but focus on appearance is so important to a development of self) I’ve found many people identify strongly with their moon sign as well (I certainly do- Pisces is a huge personal influence) I have to say that some of my strongest and longest lasting friendships are with Aries, and those tended to develop during those years. Anyway, thanks for sharing some of your insight and some fun Astro conversation!! Wishing you all the best and never hesitate to seek me out lurking in these comments if you wanna talk stars lol ✨ ⭐️ 🌟 🌛🖤🦇

[@SBEtherwave]

You got this!

[@angelabenedict]

Thank you!

[@SBEtherwave]

@@angelabenedict You're most welcome!

[@jessicaison2140]

I love your videos, and I want you to know that my thoughts are with you as you continue through the IVF process. I hope it has the results you're hoping for!

[@RocketNinjaSlap]

I'm glad, other than the vein blowout, that your procedure went well, and I hope your recovery and the rest of the process go smoothly! That said, it was almost 90 yesterday and my AC is out of commission. No more beautiful weather. I need it to be 63 and rainy until I can fix the stupid thing.

[@ozvioletbutterfly]

I really wish all the best for you and your beloved, I hope this process will be successful and you can finally be the mother you long to be and a damn great one you will be at that! Love from london x

[@tavavashechiunzi9196]

I don't know why but at 5:24 - 5:28 the music just hits different with the imagery of that cross, like I can't describe it but it made so much sense to me. Just beautiful. Also, that part with you having your hand up for an extended period of time in the video kinda reminded me of when I'd walk around school with my t-rex arms and talk to people (teachers included) with my arms like that for HOURS without noticing 🤣🤣🤣. Wishing you the best of luck right now. Take care and stay safe. Also, I can't wait for your next video🖤🖤🖤🦇🦇🦇

[@TheChadTI]

That eye makup is AWESOME. 🤙 It's not as easy as some might think to make it look like that. Also, hospital/nurse stories ate harrowing...

[@lotsoffun4108]

Big hugs...trauma...me too....Yes I've had the I.v. things too coz I have a kidney condition and have to go drips, and I don't know why they are like it, maybe jealousy or they were the bullies in school, but it's like they don't care and hurt your veins. Sometimes I'm sure it's on purpose. Charming. Lol.

[@lasantuzza777]

thanks for sharing with us 🖤 everything is going to work out for you in a beautiful way. you deserve it! 🤍

[@wolfiethedog76]

I wanna visit H-mart and get that discount on Sushi....

[@angelabenedict]

Do it! You won't regret it.

[@wolfiethedog76]

@@angelabenedict I gotta take a flight to NYC first, lol

[@angelabenedict]

@@wolfiethedog76 Noooo, where are you located?

[@wolfiethedog76]

@@angelabenedict Detroit, Michigan

[@angelabenedict]

How far are you from Troy? There's an HMart there.

[@Wooddweller]

I’m so nervous about weird medical professionals. It makes me nervous as heck 😬

[@93Monstermike]

Best of wishes and luck for you in the future.

[@susanwzrkentin.stateparks.9158]

I know how you feel. In 2019 I had full neck fusion. C 1 thru 7 vertebra. I didn't wake up for two days. I'm only 5'3" and 107 lbs. I guess my body wasn't ready for it. I have one kidney, had rheumatic fever at 4, which put me in the hospital in London till I was 5. My doctors are very proactive and my sarcastic nature makes it better. I hope you reach your baby goals and you will be very healthy with a lovely family..

[@chelseag88]

I am so sorry you had that experience with your nurse and the IV. Even though it is in their scope of practice, most nurses receive little to no training on IV or straight needle insertion. This includes going through each step with the patient and checking in with them throughout the process. Phlebotomists are the only ones really trained for this.

[@MoonFae-fb5uu]

Im also going thrue infertility (but im 28, we started trying when i was 26). I have pcos & had thyroid canser when i was 18, so they removed my thyroid back then because of that. Its relatable to watch your videos about this because im also alternative girlie💖 I used to always ovulate on right side because of pcos, but as i did acupuncture for half a year, my left side "woke up" and i started to also ovulate on that side. For example last cycle my both sides ovulated, so i had change for twins. For me both my fallotobian tubes are open so it doesnt really matter, althought having changes for twins is cool. But i thought just letting you know that acupuncture can cause other side that doesnt usually ovulate to ovulate 💖 it did that to me. If you havent already tried acupuncture of course. Baby dust to you 💖💖✨✨

[@vaneruin]

I wish you the best!

[@SBEtherwave]

And nice post op story! When I had a** hole surgery, I came out post op smiling and flashing the peace sign in a semi conscious state lmao

[@angelabenedict]

That sounds like propofol!

[@SBEtherwave]

@@angelabenedict Whatever it was, it was some strong S***! LOL Need to have that on tap.

[@angelabenedict]

@@SBEtherwave definitely the propofol. That's what they gave me to help me wake up easier from the anesthesia. I had an endoscopy where they didn't have to intubate me because I guess they didn't care about my lungs lol and I got straight propofol and I woke up feeling like I could fly. The next time I was put out was straight anesthesia and I woke up crying, shaking uncontrollably and ready to throw up.

[@foxehblaze]

I know what you mean about others being shocked about how you may have interests outside of the macabre. My friend was in disbelief when she found out that I love Lady Gaga and it bewildered me how she would think that my interests are limited just because of how I dress. It's almost like being health conscious and people gasping that you have a piece of cake when it's presented to you. "I'm surprised you're eating that! Dont you excercise and eat well?" *sigh I'm human, just like you. :) Good luck to you on your journey. I wish the best for you and your future family.

[@DiamanteDea]

Humans are complex and layered like how many ppl you know who have multiple hobbies or interests? It’s insane! Especially for goths people think only goth stuff only like come on we are human beings

[@lustfulerostypevampire]

Keep up the good work, brave one ❤❤❤❤

[@james1014328]

glad to see your ok. and best wish's. 😎

[@greenmedic88]

"A system of cells interlinked, within cells interlinked, within cells interlinked within one stem." Good luck with the call

[@angelabenedict]

I tried, as it turns out they're not going to update us until 7 days post procedure. They give us an update 24 hours later and now we play the waiting game. We'll know on Thursday.

[@TheMuseSway]

Blewing a vein sucks. When I was going through some rough mental times. I was sent to the mental hospital. A nurse blew a vein on my arm and knicked a nerve and that shit hurt. Took months for me to recover from the nerve pain. Though turns out I was going through a Fibromylagia flare up at the same time. That all didn't help.

[@angelabenedict]

Ugh, I'm so sorry 🖤 You were so vulnerable in the first place and being in that situation is so scary. When the people around you are meant to help and protect you and that's the foot they lead with, it can be hard to trust anyone's 'got' yo after that. After the nurse did that, I was like - crap, wtf is the surgical team like?! Turns out it, it's usually just one bad apple. I'm sorry you went through that pain. 🖤

[@TheMuseSway]

@@angelabenedict Yes it's true. I think it doesn't help working in the mental hospital, a lot of the patients are aggressive. Some constantly taunt or try to trick the staff into doing stuff. I think they sometimes go a little rough on them out of pent up frustration. In my case, I have small veins to begin with. Can't donate plasma or blood too often to begin with. It took about a month for the bruise to disappear & took about three months for the nerve pain to stop. :/ Though overall I did get the help I needed.

[@don-dspid2404]

Wishing you all the best with this whole procedure. I do wish they would hire the ladies from the lab centers that draw blood, like Labcorp. They never mis, at least on me. The last procedure I had they stabbed me 4 times, one of which they dumped fluid in the back of my hand. Between two nurses they finally got it on the fifth try. I had bruises all over my arms a week later. However this is not about me, its about you. Take care and good luck with the call tomorrow.

[@sel.ander2024]

Best of luck!

[@angelabenedict]

Thank you!

[@wolfiethedog76]

The human mind is a interesting thing....the "levels" remind me of compartmentalizing situations to achieve the goal and survive to the next "round"....

[@hilarysell66]

Best of luck, and I can relate more than you can probably imagine to so many of the things that you were talking about with surgery and then some I'm right behind you in age. I will be 44 in January, I have had 45 surgeries I was mentioning to you some of the things with one of your posts on Instagram. Children are not something that I can do you know that I am at my age with having spina bifida. And well trauma yeah thanks to home and well I suppose with that many surgeries under my belt that in itself is kind of a form of trauma amongst the other kinds of medical things that you have to go through when you have a disability. Been there done that when it comes to the iv situation. Arnica gel definitely can help with the bruising and the discomfort. Hope everything turns out positive and look forward to another video

[@NancyBrown1975]

Since we sometimes can’t make things happen fast and make things happen we want to happen, we can distract ourself with something else that would be exciting too. If the thing we want happens, we can always turn our attention back around to that. If we are totally immersed into something that has us on tract toward something else-that we will need to do any way if the other thing doesn’t work out-we are off to a good start making other plans for our life. If the cake has all the correct ingredients-it is going to bake. If not, we can make a stew, or pizza or something else that makes us happy. There are many, many things in life that can bring us joy and happiness. Experiences in life teach us things that when we look back we can say its ok that that happened to us because look what we learned, or have now or who knows what the wonderful thing for our future will be. I have a friend who wanted to have children, keep teaching school and become a school principal some day. It didn’t turn out that way because the man she loved wanted a divorce. Plus she went into early menopause, hence no children during the marriage. LSS-she now has a 3 story beautiful historic goth home she owns listed in the national registry as a historical landmark, owns a Spanish villa hotel, apartment complex, a cottage, and another house. Those are her children. She is always doing and going making her way in her life without her previous dream by making a new dream. My life has been hell. However, you know what? I wouldn’t change it for anything because I have the answer to many many questions that arose during my life. Sometimes you just have to change horses in mid stream.

[@elizabethmartinez4561]

I enjoy your channel like always beautiful but can you do a makeup 💄 tutorial if you don't mind. I admire your look, do anything you want. See you next time ⌚ beautiful

[@chrispena4582]

Her eyeshadow matches her lips 👄 ❤❤❤. Mmmm, this woman is So beautiful

[@LS-um3zq]

That blown stick looked awful! I'm hoping the best for you!

[@ogdenville]

Small world .....The first thing I drank after a hernia op was Ginger Ale. Hits different, huh ?

[@angelabenedict]

You aint kidding! That flavor and carbonation right after waking up like that is pure magic.

[@robertpetre9378]

I wonder if this is related to trauma in people with autism and ADHD has a lot of those people also have problems with acid reflux and digestion?

[@boris1387]

Hey it's been a minute!! Hope you're good Angela 🎉x

[@goodchildmusic0]

I have a friend that has gone through this.

[@Chelaxim]

Hugz 🦇

[@angelabenedict]

***squeeeeeze***

[@hijackbyejack1729]

Seems like your videos have had desynced audio lately.

[@nicodiabolique4925]

I had a girl in middle school ask me 50 million questions about how I live (what I eat, how I sleep, etc.) 😆

[@wolfiethedog76]

Do the doctors have you on a iron supplement due to all the blood loss during these procedures?

[@JohnDarwin7]

🌹❣️🌹

[@gargoylewiz]

FIRST!! 🦇🖤

[@bradhirigoyen3039]

I love the chest tattoo & u look beautiful

[@raversfantasy]

That’s a necklace hahaha it is pretty cool tho

[@angelabenedict]

Good idea for a tattoo tho!

[@Anonymous-wb3nz]

That's not a tattoo. It's clearly a necklace....

[@paws-h8p]

dear, you think WAAAAAAAAY TOOOOOO much lol. 😸😸

[@paulcogswell6342]

Odd, I was "othered" and treated as unhuman by you recently. You expect everyone to care about your hardships, but you couldn't care less about others. You're a hypocrite.

[@angelabenedict]

Firstly, I don't know you and secondly, I am not beholden to you and you are not entitled to me. As you can see - I have a lot going on in my real life and who/what I allow to take up what little bandwidth I have left over, I do because I care for the person/cause in question. If you got the business end of me, I assure you - you most likely deserved it. Enlighten me, how did I 'other' you and treat you inhumanely?

[@paulcogswell6342]

@angelabenedict I was facing a terrible existential crisis that had me looking at my .357 magnum like it was a pez dispenser, and the bullets were sweet little candies. Despite your caring public demeanor, you couldn't have cared less. It's pretty obvious since you replied so swiftly to the last comment. And do you feel that you have to be beholden to someone to offer them aid? I find that particularly odd, considering I've generously helped countless strangers.

[@paulcogswell6342]

What, no swift vitriolic retort? You know, you could just do the decent thing and apologize, and I would respond decently and forgive you... but it's 2024, and most people seem to have forgotten how to be basically decent.

[@angelabenedict]

I'm not apologizing for something I didn't do. You provide no specifics, give me No context or reference and just expect me to believe that this happened when I don't even know who you are.

[@paulcogswell6342]

@angelabenedict Do you even read what you write? I mean, give me a break! I just made all this up and started coming at you in the comments for no reason? How likely do you think that is? And the ego on you is truly astounding! I mean, you just presume that you're always in the right, don't you? Never even considering you just might be the asshole today. I thought about what I'd do in your shoes, and I concluded that even if I didn't know what the other party was claiming was true. I'd probably still apologize just because I know I'm not infallible and might have done something wrong incidentally. Sometimes, not helping is the same as hurting.

[@carbonatedwater8739]

I know others already said this but you are very strong. Very endeared when you were talking about the cells being an hour away. Best of luck Angela!!