I'm Upset My Wife Won't Take a Better Paying Job

[@susanmarie2231]

The husband keeps saying he’s fine with whatever his wife wants to do but he doesn’t sound like he’s fine with it. There’s nothing wrong with that but be upfront and honest with your feelings about it. Best wishes to the couple in working it out.

[@lms2379]

Yep, and if he’s “fine with whatever she wants”, why is he on the phone with Ramsey Solutions?

[@js8430]

@@lms2379 Exactly

[@heathmcconnell3901]

In fairness, people can mean different things when they say "I'm fine with it." Sometimes, they use that phrase to mean "I will wholeheartedly support whatever decision you come to". Sometimes, it means "I don't really give a rat's behind". Sometimes, in between the lines, they're saying "this is an acceptable decision, but not the decision I'd prefer you make".

[@markg999]

Yea he needs to just say it...he wants her to take the other job.

[@chopperinmylivingroom2335]

Well said!

[@pinkpanda5696]

She's tired and a little broken and he won't even give her the grace of having some rest. He needs to take a step back and re-evaluate his "in sickness and in health" vow. She is tired! Consider the person over the money. Maybe he needs to work 60 hours a week.

[@dandotvid]

"She wants to work part time, which I'm fine with." Narrator: "He was not fine with it."

[@selfaware3940]

Should he be though? family debt is a shared thing and she gets a break when he does...at retirement.

[@todd2456]

"I want you to give her an environment where she can dream openly". Wow - that's good stuff.

[@sidneybristow815]

That’s great but does he mean it? He’s a bit passive aggressive about what he wants.

[@jjjackson5183]

She will smell manipulation. She worked 60 hours per week. How many hours does he work? Maybe he needs to take a second job? Do they have kids?

[@annetraut8247]

She's been working for 23 years and they still have $45K debt but only $25K in savings? They must have been blowing money for a looooong time.

[@CC-dx3it]

@Robert Santiago why don’t you pay off your car in full with 30k in savings? Just curious

[@perry.672]

@@CC-dx3it he probably makes more in investments than the interest rate from the debt? Idk either tbh I would probably pay it off

[@turtleanton6539]

Indeed😊

[@cindypetterson8578]

He should be working 60 hrs a week to pay off his student loan. She has been working 23 years up to 60 hrs a week - how much extra has he put on his student loan.

[@culpd]

@@jeromehenry4484 Interesting that the student loan is considered “his,” but in other Ramsey videos when the woman brings a student loan to the marriage then that debt is considered “theirs.”

[@rationalsamrat3247]

@@culpd that's just classic feminazi viewpoint. What's yours is mine and what's mine is mine .

[@littleripper312]

@@culpd Interesting that she is the one paying off "their" student loans meanwhile he's just chillin working normal hours.

[@LillyAnnHouston]

Just turned 45 and started my state’s pension. We’re debt free and I knew I didn’t want to work full time anymore. Got hired PT and my husband is so supportive. He even tells me not to work and relax. I really appreciate him right now after hearing this call.

[@jimroscovius]

My wife worked 80 hours a week in 2010. Along with my job, we were able to cash flow our kids in private college. She said she was not going to do that again. I agreed 100%, and she hasn't.

[@retheisen]

Are you working 80 hours per week now, or are the kids back in public school?

[@jimroscovius]

@@retheisen That was college, so they are done. My point was that she did it when she wanted to, so we could cash flow college. Since then, she's been working about 50 hrs per week.

[@KS-cl8br]

@@jimroscovius 50 per week is a lot why not 32 to 40?

[@TartarianTopG]

@@KS-cl8br 50 is a lot less than 80 tho lol

[@jimroscovius]

@@KS-cl8br She doesn't mind working a few extra hours, just not 80.

[@colleenthecatlady2344]

What about wife's mental and emotional health???

[@dontworry1568]

just get another cat, youll be ok.

[@fuse98]

@@dontworry1568 actually lol'd ... thank you.

[@1966bluemax]

What about the husband’s?

[@mmmmmmmm1942]

@@1966bluemax it's his debt lol

[@anthonypazoz4323]

@@mmmmmmmm1942 it's THEIR debt as a married couple

[@rosamoreno4794]

The caller misled us saying they were financially secure. Sir....no you are not! If we spoke to the wife, she’d probably tell us she’s fried with work and him.

[@debcomly2481]

Exactly!!

[@sandramulchahey8268]

@Johnny Five Then he needs to find another job if he is fried.

[@cindypetterson8578]

@Johnny Five she is the one working 60 hrs a week and probably the majority of the household work. He should pick up extra hours cause I bet he isn’t working 60 hrs a week and coming home to cook supper and do laundry.

[@AndrewPL5]

"I'm cool with whatever she wants to do"...proceeds to call the Ramsay show to see what he can do to make her take the job he wants her to. cool.

[@cynthialeech2507]

@julian blake I'm so glad I'm single!

[@mmmmmmmm1942]

I'd so leave him

[@Andromedon777]

@@mmmmmmmm1942 you would divorce your husband, something incredibly sinful, because you have a slight disagreement and he's seeking council on what to do before going further with it? Man, maybe you're spouse should leave you for your recklessness

[@mistyvance4544]

Sounds like he's upset that she no longer wants to be a work-mule to help pay off his debt.

[@latoyacunningham6940]

👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

[@lotuswolf1518]

True, he using her for his benefits

[@plants4thewin]

Yes!

[@plants4thewin]

LOL...yes

[@mmmmmmmm1942]

@@michaelpalumbo4880 if he wants his debt paid off he can pick up more hours or a new job lol

[@littleripper312]

Ending bit was the answer to most conflicts in general. We often forget to listen to others and let them breath because we're so blinding with what we want and our opinions.

[@Primitive_Code]

I don't think this guy got the answer he was looking for, it all blew up in his face lol.

[@fuse98]

His question wasn't really what he should have been asking. There's a lot of miscommunication and differences of how each attack debt and savings. If you're not on the same page with money ... yikes. Delaying the inevitable unfortunately, unless they talk to each other and not at each other as was recommended. He got very good advice even if it wasn't to his initial question, up to him whether or not he heard it.

[@periodt360]

@@Faith-un7ns Every woman is not a work mule like you.

[@Ndemlaughs]

the husband isn't fine with it or listening to his wife. she wants to do part time and he needs to dig deeper to effectively listen to what she's expressing.

[@Becca_Lynn]

“She’s coming from a toxic, male dominated workplace” *Calls to get the opinion of two men instead of listening to his wife”. Neat. Love it.

[@neolithic3]

Well how else can he mansplain to her how her work environment is wrong. lol

[@nelliedean7088]

“She” “she” “she” how about my wife or her name.

[@avocadogaming3942]

Cuz he's a beta

[@idoliiseme]

Ridiculous.

[@nfldshorty21]

They will be on her side though lol Clearly husband is an idiot and she is sick of paying his debts

[@bindingcurve]

He does not want to pay off debt, he wants to keep living his lifestyle, and it is either have the wife work, or start on the beans and rice.

[@sunset6010]

Ah, could be ! Nice catch ✔

[@akg_table]

How do you know its his lifestyle? It's often women that really value the status that costs all the money to maintain

[@bindingcurve]

@@akg_table He stated in the call that she is the saver. He also stated this part of the "debt" he wants to pay off and he refinance his student loans. She just wants to recharge and not work 60 hour weeks for a while. The part time job will give her time to find something better.

[@darbyohara]

Nope. Wife is lazy and selfish. They have 45k in debt and only 25k in savings. She wants to do what she wants which is a bad move for the family and is defying her husbands leadership

[@MadDog_Rules]

@@darbyohara You think working 60 hours a week, is lazy? You don't even know how many hours the husband works, it could be just 40 hours a week and maybe he earns a third of what she was earning and he relied on her financially to support his lifestyle? He stated that the wife is careful with money and saves, yet he's the one with debts.

[@lifeastaylor5992]

The repetitive “it’s fine it’s totally fine with me yeah it’s fine” confirms that it is NOT fine with him. Clearly he’s bothered. Admit you’re bothered and let your wife be happy with her choice. HER job. YOUR job. Quality of life matters.

[@SarahLarsonwgm]

He mentioned that she worked 60 hours a week. I wanted them to ask him how many hours he works a week. But even if he did work as much or more than she did everyone is wired differently and they may not do the same amount of work at home so I think she deserves to feel tired. 60 hours a week is a lot even in a great environment.

[@rodneyevans8362]

I am a man and wouldn't want to work 60 hours a week. I have done it before, it will affect you eventually.

[@latoyacunningham6940]

Yes, and who is cooking, cleaning, taking care of the emotional needs of the family? This call bothered me.

[@MooMoo69556]

Bro sometimes it’s not all about $$$, if you can come home and ur wife is there and your there in a home full of love and she’s happy asf. Then that’s all u need. We put too much pressure to work work work work in our society.

[@markg999]

Dude spit it out...you want the wife to take the new job making more.

[@erikgonzalez2278]

The other guy host said it yeah of course I want my wife take a higher paying job but.

[@quarterlimit5838]

13 years. Bud, my guess is you’re disappointed you’re not high in the hog after 13 years of marriage. Guess what, life is mountains. How about YOU look for a higher job?

[@cathyosullivan718]

I wouldn’t push a partner to take a job they don’t want. It’s not like she isn’t contributing. Money isn’t everything; life is too short to work at a job you hate.

[@Evil-Rod-Farva]

Life is also too short to postpone paying debts off. His wife is being selfish. I believe this call would’ve went differently had the wife called.

[@cathyosullivan718]

It sounds like she is very burned out though. I think there are other ways of paying down debt; perhaps living more simply or picking up an additional lower stress part time job.

[@nic_ccc3366]

Ken & John were absolutely right that there is a "fracture" in their relationship regarding their finances. They are simply not on the same page and it sounds like neither is up for compromising right now. Hope they work it out.

[@kashfortheking]

Be happy she’s still working.

[@baklava9040]

This is the exact type of marriage I do not want to be in lol

[@shnuggumz]

And why is that?

[@jmc8076]

All marriages have challenges.

[@jmc8076]

@Heinrich Himmler How is working and committed to working 60hr weeks for 23 yrs for a co that was bought and now toxic lazy?

[@SevenHunnid]

I get high in my KZbin videos for a living 🥶

[@shnuggumz]

@Heinrich Himmler Why is she a "lazy" woman?

[@sweetgirl4u247]

Indirectly trying to push her into the higher paying job to pay off debt. She worked 50+ hours off and on for 23 years. She seems responsible, the caller on the other hand just seems like is full of excuses.

[@merrymaurader2521]

I’d rather make less and do a job I like than make more and do a job I hate

[@dontworry1568]

for me, i hate all jobs because im lazy. lol. so i just take the highest paying job I can find.

[@eugenawoodson3816]

This caller is another example as to why I'm single... He's talking out of both sides of his mouth... You either support her or you don't, ... Thank You Dr. John for pointing out he's doing the same thing the men at her old job was doing... Most "husbands" that call in to the show help to keep me single and making better life decisions for myself...

[@sunset6010]

He is SO FINE with her decision yet ... called in to a RADIO SHOW. What a LIAR ... how bizarre 🚨

[@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303]

When females state "That's fine." You know that it is not. He is obviously feeling that it is NOT fine.

[@jmc8076]

@@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303 Husb said ‘I’m fine’ not his wife. She was upfront and honest. Listen again.

[@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303]

@@jmc8076 Females are never honest.

[@charliethomlin6434]

@@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303 who hurt you? :(

[@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303]

@@charliethomlin6434 You just did.

[@lynnebucher6537]

I heard the caller talk a lot about how he wants his wife to make more money to pay off debt that he has incurred. What I did not hear is what extra effort he was willing to put in to get this debt paid off. And if they've been married that long and they still have this kind of debt they're living above their means.

[@kimmywimmy7305]

He keeps saying “that’s fine!” It’s clearly not fine, otherwise he wouldn’t be calling.

[@clarifyingquestions]

Savings is NOT a safety net if you have a debt. negative 20k what is safe about that. Also, he sounds very silly. What does he do for a living.

[@0iron0maiden]

Ladies, this is what we call a nightmare husband.

[@matthewgardner2144]

"Whatever you want to do is fine, hon. Just so long as it benefits me. I'm going to call in some janky "Christian" GQP radio personality to get his take on it."

[@suzannemiller993]

60 hours a week plus (probably) most of the household chores. If he wants her to take the higher paying job working fulltime maybe he needs to take more responsibility for household chores.

[@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303]

We do not know the split in chores. Just put together what you are listening, not adding irrelevant information.

[@grizzlybear2702]

Of course. If they are both working and paying the bills then he should help around the house.

[@ryanj357]

Sounds like she's an Accountant. Why not just take a couple of weeks off? She's probably just burnt out.

[@Inlalasland]

That’s what I was thinking! Definitely an accountant.

[@ryanj357]

@@Inlalasland Haha it was a pretty easy guess. Busy seasons. 60 hour work weeks. Yeah It's pretty obvious.

[@Becca_Lynn]

He explained in the rest of the video

[@annetraut8247]

As a CPA, I can tell you that burnout is real. It doesn't matter if you take a couple weeks off, when you're done with public accounting, you are DONE.

[@fuse98]

I don't think a couple weeks off will solve 23 years at a place that you outgrew and started to hate. She sounds like she needs a new beginning to be inspired again.

[@hails_m88]

He needs to take a step back and be in her shoes. Our mental health is so much more important than freaking money. I get it everyone has debt. But if she needs a break for awhile. Give it to her. She can ALWAYS get a full time job it sounds like with what she does. That's awesome that they have 25k saved back. I get it he wants everything paid off. He needs to be a husband first and understand where she is coming from. When you keep going and going when you're burnt out and miserable. You eventually break. I know because I'm personally going through it. I was at a teaching job three-five years. Not making hardly anything burnt out mentally. Now I finally am getting the break I am needing. I'm working part time for now. I'm doing my hobbies on the side to make extra $. My husband has a great job..where I'm able to do this for awhile. I'm so thankful for that. Because he needed a break a year ago. I held it down for us. Because we are a TEAM! 🙌

[@rnoemi4]

Pay your own student loans... n then work together to pay the mutual debt y’all have. Don’t force the poor woman to overwork for ur lack of responsibility with student loans 😕

[@anthonypazoz4323]

It's all mutual debt they are MARRIED

[@pingupenguin2474]

No, its not. My hubby rung up 2 big credit card debts. I paid it off the first time, with my savings. Then he did it again ! This time he is paying it down himself !! He needs to feel the cost, and I need to have some savings in case we have an emergency, or if he dies first ( we are pensioners and I don't want to loose the jointly owned house to his creditors. ) Our relationship is good, he is a kind, gentle man, he is just weak with budgetting, its not a deal breaker, some things are more important than money. I am just not going to pay this particular bill. It should be paid off by end of the year, then the next discussion is about him contributing to emergency fund !!

[@bbx8229]

Beautiful how Dan brought the balance. The husband was not being horrible but was being logical- The advisors were able to say yes that might be logical but your wife has a need out side of what may seem right to you

[@SherryEllesson]

When the guy said his wife's old job required 60 hrs a week seasonally, my old Accountant gene kicked in and said, "I remember that!" It sounds like he really is just seeing the dollar signs and yes, Dr D. I too think he's putting her in a corner just like she's had to deal with at work, and I don't blame her for wanting to maintain her safety net. SO...what's HE doing to pay off his student loans?

[@philliberatore4265]

If he was really"fine" with whatever she decides, then he wouldn't be on the phone

[@appleforever6664]

When you are single, you have 90% control but when you are married, you only have 50% control. 20-30% control when you have kids. Good luck to the caller.

[@Aaron-jj6on]

Those odds seem alittle high for men lol

[@oldmangana]

50% control when you are married is very optimistic. Lol

[@appleforever6664]

@@oldmangana - True. I was trying to play fair.

[@ratsofatso5525]

@@appleforever6664 by lying?

[@corey407woc]

Marriage is an attempt to solve problems together which you didn't even have when you were on your own.

[@csx6910]

More money means more financial security and more options. Not taking a better paying job is fine so long as everyone understands that options will be limited and they won't be able to do certain things in life. A simple life isn't a bad life but both people have to be on board with that.

[@gerardopliego-financevideo8214]

It depends on what her goals are, what if the new job she works 70 hours and isn’t making her happy ? This is a little convoluted for me tbh .

[@hip360hop]

@Johnny Five you have a bad outlook on life

[@elnegrobembon]

@Johnny Five No matter what your boss tells you, we're not just cogs in a machine to make business owners wealthy. Our work should allow us to feel fulfilled as well. We're human beings. Not robots.

[@newpotter7756]

Pay off your own student loan ...sound like a snowflake

[@lexm17]

@@newpotter7756 seriously snowflake?

[@judywood4530]

The poor woman's emotions are fried. She just needs some time to mentally heal and put the toxic job at some distance in the rear view mirror. Six months or a year from now, she may be more willing to participate in the "what do we want for our futured" conversation.

[@d0llface503]

She is burnout its normal. He should get a better job then. Ive been working 3 + years 50+ hours a week the money is good but mentally and physically I need a break.

[@MadDog_Rules]

I wish you had asked what their separate incomes were. It sounds like the wife had a great paying job and i feel like she was carrying most of the weight financially.

[@TheLuxeTraveler702]

The 'fracture' is he likes not having her home 60, 70, 80 hrs a weeks, working part-time she's now going to be home 😂

[@angryroadster7772]

it's too rare to find a woman like this.

[@ayonnazglam9050]

Great advice!! Some things are just about peace of mind.

[@randallrobinson7853]

So.... Is the response the same if the husband is burnt out and wants to take a part time job?

[@thebra]

Not a chance. If it was a woman calling in about her husband wanting to work part time he would be considered less of a man, it's his role etc. Male "privilege" in reality.

[@elnegrobembon]

Economic issues affecting marriages? That never happens! Over-worked, over-stressed, over-indebted, and underpaid people never let that affect marriages. Dude should be mad at the employer for forcing his wife to work under those conditions for so long.

[@donaldrichey3318]

Why isn’t she making this call? Sounds to me she is the only one happy in that house.

[@latoyacunningham6940]

He needs to pay off his own student loan. I guarantee this lady was working full time, cleaning the house, cooking the food, saving the money, if they have kids...caring for them etc. Husband needs to work and let his wife be.

[@kaylaa2466]

@@michaelpalumbo4880 SHE NEEDS HELP! She’s drowning & this guy is a toxic Beta

[@BrandonMinguez]

More money and being depressed isn’t worth it. If she enjoys the current job and you can still keep a roof over your head and put food on the table, that’s what matters.

[@BrandonMinguez]

@@Faith-un7ns I think you just answered why it won’t get paid off. They didn’t pay off the debt when she worked full-time so nothing is going to change with how much she works. What would hopefully change is for them to get on the same page when it comes to finances and after 13 years of marriage Im surprised it hasn’t happened yet. The suggestion at the end was definitely a good one as they need to determine what they want to do together (not just individually) and then they can redo the budget and come up with a plan of attack for the debt.

[@BrandonMinguez]

@@Faith-un7ns Very true, but I think the “negotiations” like that might’ve contributed to why she doesn’t want to pay off the debt. All she’s had is men boss her around in her life and trying to say “let’s spend $24000” of our savings (regardless of how much she’s working) might not go over so well. I agree that using that savings to pay off the debt is the quickest way to do it, so hopefully they can work out something that works for both of them.

[@nic969]

@Heinrich Himmler der Name sagt schon alles

[@emmawilkins5755]

So long as you can pay your bills, tackle your debt and have a bit of spending money, then adjust your budget and allow your wife to work part time. Having been there, suffering in a job you hate / feeling you have no work life balance you can't put a price on that. I'm certain if your wife begins to feel happier, less stressed and knows that you value her wellbeing over money, your relationship will improve too.

[@pelard8003]

This is powerful, great perspective gentlemen 👏🏿

[@araineacutebrownnurse7315]

There’s a disconnect here and some selfishness

[@latoyacunningham6940]

Has he considered downsizing? I wonder what his lifestyle is.

[@rodneyevans8362]

His is a liar. If you didn't have a problem you wouldn't be calling in.

[@sct4040]

People who have debts should just live together and not get married. Never take on someone else's debt.

[@tweedle634]

When it comes down to it. If the bills are paid, you have no debt, no real financial obligations that can't be paid with the lower paid job. Happiness trumps cash EVERYDAY of the week.Especially if you aren't broke already.

[@random-nz7dy]

They would probably benefit from some marriage counseling. I think she's valid and feeling tired and worn out. But it's a major thing to want to drop 2/3 of your income especially when you're not financially secure. so he's also valid and feeling frustrated that she is wanting to drop down so much in income while they still have all this debt.

[@CatherineGoodrich]

This is the most level headed comment here...

[@ging-gingw2406]

Sell the husband!!!!

[@Maryland_Kulak]

Real men don’t send their wives out to work for other men. Real men are able to support a family.

[@ohlalaparis1106]

Haha 😆

[@grizzlybear2702]

And then their wife complains about the wage gap.

[@thebra]

Ha!

[@Juantobiasarango]

No wage gap. Is just men supporting their wife. Lol.

[@joee3582]

45k in debt... They both need to make as much as possible to get themselves out of debt.

[@wadeharris348]

I told my girlfriend straight up that I'm not oging to be making that much money in my career. I'd probably top out at 100k and thats about it. I said if you want us to make more money then you have to also get a job and contribute. I put it all out on the line and was straight up honest with her. If you want to make millions, you have to look somewhere else and I'm not taking on multiple jobs and burning out without ever getting a chance to treat myself. It just doesn't work like that but I was open and honest about it.

[@wadeharris348]

If you want to find someone else, then the door is wide open for you to find another person. I also have needs and you need to let me wet my beak as well if you want us to succeed. It's just the way it goes.

[@jimroscovius]

It's time for her to take a break. You can work more, buddy!!

[@Neddie2k]

The man is a spender, the wife is a saver. This man should get a second job and pay off his student loan and his vehicle.

[@debpratt52]

Absolutely!

[@cardinal8268]

It's always easy when you're not the one who has to actually do it.

[@tcbridges]

It's him that wants him to go for more money. Who is kidding who.

[@893263007]

Dan needs to improve his communication skills. But never they asked what the pay difference was or how Dan was feeling.

[@rosya.traveler4269]

This is a funny call. Lol 😂 dude saying he is cool with it but he isn’t really cool with it. The whole reason he called in lol 😂

[@augustinerubio2004]

Sounds like it took 13 years to realize what being married actually feels like 🤣

[@danielvasquez3758]

Yeah that’s something where possible conflicts could arise from. And this dude is just as indecisive as she is. Good luck to them both though!

[@pwners4u]

Talking to your partner about improving themselves and their life through promotions or career development is healthy. However when you say she can do what she likes (within reason of course) but then want her to take the money when she may not be happy doing it, not like the company, feels under experienced for the job etc then you’re pushing your partner towards mental health problems down the road.

[@maxrice6990]

In my opinion, when Ken Coleman and John Delony are on together, they probably give the consistently worst advice and make the most assumptions instead of listening.

[@KNMK259]

Love the way Dr. John broke it down.

[@bwayne40004]

Dude wants to flog the mule.

[@sct4040]

Sounds like the couple should cut back on their expenses, and keep the part time job. Working 60 hour weeks is ridiculous.

[@Ibrahim-vx5kq]

People calling the wife lazy when she's been working over time to pay debts that aren't even hers He wants to 'Get ahead' ie, making his wife pay his debts,why isn't he working more and paying HIS debts off?

[@debpratt52]

Exactly! Why can't he take a part-time job, like Dave used to say, delivering pizzas?

[@anthonypazoz4323]

The debts belong to them both as they are MARRIED

[@apeach5054]

Dave’s voice “what they should be doing is getting out of debt living from scorched earth Beans and rice rice and beans. No she shouldnt quit her job and go work part time. Tell you what, gettchaselves outta debt and then talk about scaling back her hours or if she wants to find something different. But if you’re asking me, you both should be working with gazelle intensity to get this paid down. You understand?”

[@mrsbethanyelise]

Communication between him and his wife could fix the problem more than the job choice itself.

[@Jane5720]

So he wants his wife to work this hard so he can pay off his student debt, and she's saying f*** this s*** I ain't doing it. Bravo to her

[@todd2456]

Yeah, that's helpful, Jane. Reminds me of that old SNL clip - Jane, you ignoran.... oh nevermind.

[@murderofcrows7738]

It’s not his student debt. They are married so it’s their debt. If the genders were reversed they’d be mocking the guy saying he needed to man up and pay off the family debt.

[@lotuswolf1518]

Yeah nobody is entitled to their spouse paying their student loans . I would help my husband pay off his house loans but not student loan

[@debpratt52]

Exactly! He can add 20 hours a week to his work week for 23 years and see how he likes i.

[@prkzoomin6994]

Good Quote, The secret of your future is hidden in your daily routine.

[@Evita_Raylena]

Sir, everything isn’t about money. He’s trying to work his wife to death! She’s probably burnt out.

[@goalie2998]

Equal rights.. Guys have been worked to death forever , welcome aboard ladies.

[@stevenporter863]

@Heinrich HimmlerAll else being equal - since they included her old income in their budget it really isn't fair at all of her to take a job 1/3 salary in the name of 'burnout' when she has another offer at full salary. Someone (the calling husband) will have to pick up the slack.

[@grizzlybear2702]

@@goalie2998 exactly. Robins Williams committed suicide because he could no longer afford his £100k per month in alimony.

[@DandyFinance]

It is tough to agree on finances for a couple. I wonder if they have kids, that will make it even harder. I hope they figure it out!

[@cg741graf5]

She needs that safety net to feel SAFE because of his bills and his actions. She’s protecting the family from his not leading in a healthy manor. Why should she continue busting when he’s racking up debt.

[@gabrielvidaurre3018]

Let's goo. I'm currently living in boise idaho at the moment. It's so weird seeing other callers from this place

[@ocaminhodoingles]

I never heard about this place before, but I'm not american, so is the first time I'm seeing about this place

[@gabrielvidaurre3018]

@jtheobbles86 moved to boise idaho in August 2020 for a job opportunity. Just thought it was cool that the caller was from boise.

[@rebeccawcleung]

This guy sounds selfish... he has 45k in debt and it’s his debt mainly... and she wanna take a part time job and he is blaming her... how come we never asked how much HE earned?

[@wewhoareabouttodiesaluteyo9303]

Because he has a full time job. She needs to get a full time in order to begin the comparison.

[@akg_table]

Alright so when he pays off this debt, it's cool if he chooses a part time and the wife works fulltime -Said no wife ever.

[@elnegrobembon]

Thanks for saying that. I wondered the same thing. Let her be happy. Mental and emotional health and satisfaction are things money can't buy. especially if you're slaving away for 50+ hours a week. I *wish* I only had 45K in debt. And I'm single. If I had the option to take a break from a stressful job I've held down for 20+ years, I would expect my partner to support me to a reasonable extent. Holding down a part-time job for a while seems reasonable to me. We're overworked and underpaid in this society. He should be reasonable, imo.

[@marvenn9878]

Whenever you’re married, you’re partners debt becomes your debt as well. This is what is wrong with marriage, you look at finances separately. A man would pay off his wife’s debt but why can’t she help pay for his?

[@Voicesoftheeveryday-y3h]

@@marvenn9878 I agree with you, they are married its their debt not his debt anymore!!

[@tjandcj123]

Is there a reason why he can’t work more so they can get ahead and pay off his student loans? Did I miss something in the conversation?

[@investinstyle-financeinves1181]

People don't change very much when it comes to their willingness to work. If the person you're dating doesn't have a great job, and doesn't mention the desire for one, they won't have one after you marry.

[@investinstyle-financeinves1181]

@C B She had a desire for a great job when she was making $15/hour.

[@elnegrobembon]

Define "great job". Is working under stressful conditions for 60-70 hours a week in a toxic environment "great"?

[@elijahberenschot3510]

I’m 21 and new to the channel, how do you move out into an apartment or something working minimum wage? I work about 50-60 hours a week and still can’t even afford a 1 bedroom

[@Aplrjybfkwlsbc]

You need a better paying job.

[@chocolatecookies5345]

If you can, relocate.

[@b.cdrisk2035]

Find a better job. Try either the USPS or TSA

[@lgee9027]

ALL GREAT ANSWERS!!!!

[@chrishere4272]

He calls saying she was offered a better paying job, she will be working twice as much is the only problem.

[@jumpiam8477]

A male dominated at work and a male dominated at home. I feel bad for her. She really need a break. Stop telling her what to do.

[@bkucenski]

The higher paying job may not be the best fit and she may be out again shortly. If the household doesn't need the money, find another way to get both of you able to reduce hours.

[@danielvasquez3758]

Jesus, listening to this dude might as well have his wife put the divorce papers on the table and call this the end of the relationship.

[@Santaheckler]

I think you guys spent a whole lot of time trying to corner this guy into being a “toxic” male instead of reasoning out a practical way for them to get on the same page. Nice work.

[@kara2162]

If this was a woman calling about her husband this would have not gone down the same way. I'm a woman and the blatant husband/male bashing on this show gets old.