I've Never Talked About This Before | The Asher House

Sharing something I've buried deep down for a long time in hopes that it might help you. Thanks for watching!
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[@sherryjacobs3907]

To all those bullies and the mean neighbor this community says......How do you like Lee now? He has a heart the size of the universe, endless compassion, patience and generosity beyond measure, successful businessman, has a you tube community that is loyal and caring....and he is smart, funny and is one freakin' smokin' hot man. I tried to keep it family oriented but you can't hide the truth! Hope your anxiety fades away.

[@jacquibradley1598]

I am 65 and was bullied, but dogs saved me!! DO NOT GIVE UP! It does get better

[@debby8428]

When my 12 year old son died in an accident my husband and I saw a therapist who cost $300 per hour. (She didn't charge us that much due to the nature of the tragedy. )She told us EXACTLY what you just said. Think about where feelings are coming from and it might help to understand them. I understand your fear of losing your dogs even for ten seconds. What a horrible thing to go through as a 10 year old. I am so sorry. Maybe that lesson has turned you into the most compassionate loving human being dog rescuer that you have become.

[@AGoddess18]

So very sorry for the loss of your son Debby 💔

[@4bratkab565]

So sorry for your loss 😢💔🙏🌷🌷🌷PRAYERS !

[@shalacarter6658]

oh, Debby! My heart breaks for you. My 15-year-old niece was killed by a drunk hit-and-run driver. It tore up the family.

[@Cat-qo3ht]

I am so sorry for your unfathomable loss of your beloved son 💔💙

[@queen452010]

Sorry for your loss .

[@mamarijke]

I am very sad for my dog died suddenly yesterday. I imagine he is in a place like yours in heaven. That gives me comfort. Because your place like heaven on earth for your dog's...

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi M 👋 how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@lanettemorrison7309]

Every mom who has a kid that has been lost in the mall or 10 minutes late understands that sinking feeling and anxiety that comes from feeling like something you love so much disappear

[@SandrineMuller]

Such a sad story. The little boy inside you is still grieving for this poor puppy. 😥

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Sandra how are you doing today

[@Linwan2023]

Maybe one of the neighbors took your dog!

[@Linwan2023]

It was a traumatizing event losing your best friend!

[@bellat2613]

We had a border collie that ran away. In a thunder storm. We looked and looked. 6 months later we saw someone walking our dog on a leash. We took her back. They had taken good care of her. It may be comforting to imagine that this may have happened to Tarzan. ❤

[@abbygurl55]

Wow that’s great that they gave you your pup back

[@darlenestover8893]

It's trauma - it sticks with you until you deal with. I admire your courage for sharing it and being willing to work through it.

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Darlene how are you doing today

[@4bibimimi]

It's like what Lee went through with moo. Even the best most loyal dogs go native every now and then. He just had to recognize that m o o needed an adventure and that looking for him was actually challenging him.

[@cassthompson3386]

Trauma doesn't stick with you UNTIL you deal with it. Trauma sticks with you for the rest of your life. I think the best analogy is Trauma is a wound. That wound will stay open and infected if you never take care of it properly. When you finally take care of it, it will heal, but you will always have that scar.

[@Spoonie86]

Exactly this!

[@joanhaselman444]

Amen

[@joycewetherbee7421]

Lee, what makes you so special to all of us is the truth you give us. I’m so sorry you experienced such a devastating loss at such a young age. Thank you for sharing your insight. I’m sure I won’t be the only one taking your words to heart. Bless you and the wonderful work you do.

[@stevenwilson879]

Everyday, I wake up and look for Loretta. I will move on. Not today.

[@KateStrongHealer]

Im so sorry Lee that you were bullied as a child. And I'm sorry your dog went missing. Great insights as to why you get anxious when you can't find one of your dogs. And a great chance to take the charge out of this event and soothe your inner child.

[@markbloom8042]

You’ve been tossed some curveballs in life, that’s for sure. But you didn’t let them leave you angry or bitter. Just the opposite. You are overflowing with love and kindness, as your life’s work clearly shows. That’s such a good message for all of us. Thank you for the amazing example you set.

[@joanhaselman444]

Amen!

[@sookietrueblood-gp4sd]

AMEN!

[@Cat-qo3ht]

Ten-year old Lee gets scared of that loss happening. It's Tarzan all over again. No closure. Good for you, Lee, to go inward to peel away the layers and find the root of this visceral fear. As a ten-year old you couldn't process but now you are able to with your inner child. You go!!

[@GetReady4LiftOff]

i like that

[@alifeintransition9782]

I agree some of us don't do the work because let's face it, it can be painful or at least it has been my view point.

[@2bluemoonalpha]

Damn. That would have made a hole in my heart too. It doesn’t make sense especially when you never saw him again. Maybe some one somewhere remembers this incident and shed a light on it. I don’t know what else to say but I think you’re a strong , honest person with a big heart. Thank you for sharing.

[@fibrowarriors]

Lee I lost sight of my 2 children who were about 8 & 10 at the time. I totally lost my mind. In all they were missing for about 10 minutes. The Police came quickly and they were found with an elderly couple who were looking after them. I've never forgotten that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. My children are now grown adults but that 10 minutes were the longest in my life. I literally took my eyes off them for a couple of seconds and they were gone. I was so incredibly blessed that such a lovely couple found them and took care of them. They weren't far away but that 10 minutes was the longest of my life

[@fibrowarriors]

@@lysas781 That's really sad that no one offered to help 😢

[@marshawalker5273]

I understand. My son was lost in a mall & by the time a security guard came walking w.him 2 me I'm afraid I lost it so bad I'm sure people thot I was crazy

[@ThisOldFart2054]

I am thankful you had a happy ending

[@lisaasbill8984]

Every pet parent experiences that Lee don't ever feel like it's no big deal. You love your babies! All of us feel you! You have such an amazing heart❤️🐾❤️🐾❤️ God bless you!

[@sookietrueblood-gp4sd]

AMEN❤❤❤

[@DeLaineTriplitt]

You are such a great advocate, not only for animals but for people as well. Your advice about taking time for reflection and self care is spot on and so valuable. I hope someday to be able to visit your sanctuary and meet the animals but also to shake your hand!

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Delaine 👋 how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@joanhaselman444]

Amen

[@lynnenord8720]

I couldn't finish listening to this...I knew it would be a sad ending and what I did hear was enough to raise my anxiety.Losing a pet..and best friend as a lonely kid is devastating. I'm 62 and still remember.

[@maureenobrien9815]

I had the same reaction, it was overwhelmingly anxiety.....I had to fast forward and put it together as I felt everything he felt as that little boy. So very hard to listen to. Brought back some of my own frightening animal moments with my beloved dogs throughout my life. Wow, Lee..I feel your anxiety. It's my own!

[@melaniefowler8841]

Same here. I couldn't keep listening 😢.

[@marshawalker5273]

@@melaniefowler8841 that's Lee message. He had to finally ask himself questions tho it dug up a trauma memory

[@karenwatmough3236]

I get panic attacks. Anxiety horrible.

[@cathywilliams7336]

Thank you so much for trying to help us and you have. You are a beautiful person. Love you and your dogs.

[@quinto34]

Thanks for sharing.. I had a dog (Aghan)who ran away in the 90-ties, she was hit by a car and found 2 days later..she died alone crawled away in some bushes Whenever I don't know where my dog is, even for a moment, I tend to panic

[@cocoed8643]

That was a sad story. I appreciate your "realness" about things. I feel like people come to various KZbin videos and only want the "feel-good". And trust me, your videos are full of "feel-good". But when you speak of REALNESS and it's not always a feel-good, I appreciate it. Love your dogs and animals. Love your work. Keep going and keep being real!!

[@maureenwoodard9588]

I agree with you Coco Ed ! Very well said

[@patriciaglove8201]

Watching Lees videos I'm either smiling or crying. Something both. Ive lost animals throughout the years ,one hit by a car when she ran across the road to meet my kids when they got off the school bus. Most of my dogs died of old age one had a stroke ,i had to have her put to rest,one had arthritis so bad in her hips i had to hold her tiny body up so she could use the bathroom she too had to be help to doggy heaven.I've always been lucky to have very sweet loving dogs and it was my honor to be their care giver while on this earth. I've also lost a son ,he was a grown man he passed in 2015 he would have been 43 that year.altho i loved my dogs with all my heart i would have traded all them for just one more year with my son. To me there is no comparison, but to a person who has no children i do understand the love they have for their animals be it a dog or an opinionated cat.I have two daughters both older than my son,because of them is the only reason im still here today ,the pain of losing my son was so severe i didnt want to live through it,it would have been equally devastating if i lost one of my daughters. To me thinking back over the pets i loved dearly and lost ,i shed a tear. Thinking of my son i literally fall apart. Talking about him with his children and his sisters ,tell about funny things he did and said and remembering him as a person is better sweet but you cant just put him in the back of your mind like you can a pet because its too painful to think about,which ive done to most of the pets ive loved and lost.

[@joanhaselman444]

Yes, your REALNESS and sad stories are the most healing for so many of us, and they give us hope. God Bless you and Bless you!

[@MrsStagegrl]

7 years ago I left my 2 dogs in the backyard (fenced in) while I went to get gas… I came home (literally like 10 min later) and my oldest, my Bella, was just gone. My other dog was still there and perfectly fine. To this day, I have no clue what happened to her. Same as you, I scoured the neighborhood, looked at the animal shelters, posted on Facebook every hour every day for years. Still nothing. She was never the dog who would dig or try to get out. Ever. She was my baby. I got her in college at 4 weeks old…. Even if I left my gate open, she wouldn’t leave the yard without me right beside her. To this day, I still look for her. It breaks my heart not knowing what happened to her. She was so loving, friendly, caring, and special. I miss her every second of every day.

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Michelle how are you doing today

[@createone100]

💕🐾

[@lindakienle531]

Separation anxiety. Hopefully now that you see it, you can move forward. You are a good man.

[@rodandjudibowen5665]

Lee, I am 80 now, and maybe 20 years ago realized that many seemingly small events make a deep emotional impact. And those deep emotional impacts are written in bold print in my awareness. Your beloved Tarzan's disappearance was one of those deep emotional impactive events. I can certainly relate to your deep, abiding dismay at the loss of Tarzan. We don't know what happened with him. BUT Tarzan will greet you with happy yelps, many cute little jumps and excited noises when you meet him at the Rainbow Bridge. You will meet many others of your dogs, too. But Tarzan will be one of the most Special of All. From Another Rescuer 💖💖💖

[@2hannahsavage]

“Ask yourself enough questions to finally get the answer that you need to make a difference in your life. To get the answer you need to make a change.” 👏

[@lonnievisch6009]

What a sad story Lee. I can imagine you’re reaction from this morning. You are a wonderful human being. Hugs from Europe ❤️

[@pamelamac2879]

I have a BichonPoo. While I understand you making the leap to your unresolved loss and trauma, as a mom of two and Nana of five, I also recognize that you're a natural born parent. Your feelings of anxiety are normal parental feelings. You're a great dad to your furbabies; don't blame yourself if this doesn't change. 😘

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Pamela how are you doing today

[@tracidavis3565]

This is so refreshing to hear for someone who struggles daily, not for the same trauma but trauma is trauma.

[@beauxr.benoit1374]

I don't know if he has had Human children, but speaking as a Father I know what this is. This is the feeling when you think your child is in trouble and you get very concerned about that child. And when you find out that he or she is okay, you then go through the anxiety/relief that your child is okay and you need to take a moment to get your heartrate back to normal. Yes, this is a realization and/or the curse/gift of having children regardless as to if they are Human or Fur-babies.

[@joanhaselman444]

Thank you for being such a good father, God Bless you!

[@beauxr.benoit1374]

@@joanhaselman444 Thank you from both myself and for Lee as well.

[@tammytilley6051]

I’m sorry that your childhood holds those memories… you have such a loving soul and such love for animals …

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi TAMMY HOWAREYOUDOINGTODAY_

[@margaretburnham5683]

Anxiety hits us like that unfortunately. An automatic feeling of impending doom

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Margaret how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@lorenarivas5485]

It’s good to talk to somebody about your fear of losing your dogs 🐕 because we all have some kind of fears or trauma that we suppress and it’s triggered that anxiety

[@reneetrustsJesus]

Thank you Lee, for sharing your thoughts and introspections. And more importantly, thank you for caring enough about others to speak of your own personal struggles and triumphs. You are a wonderful example of what a man should be. God bless you.

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Renee how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@rosaliemccallum]

I know that anxiety well. It's a fear of losing something or abandonment. For me it is because my daughter left in 2016 and haven't seen her since. It's good that you could find out the why, behind your anxiety.

[@fearlessinchrist-5931]

So very sorry about your daughter. You & her are in my prayers.

[@lunkis3233]

I'm so sorry about your daughter. Love from Sweden 🇸🇪

[@chrissyluna8183]

@Rosalie.. I feel your loss. I have same anxiety and mines through the roof since my daughter was killed. Prayers to you ma'am. ❤️

[@mmmmlllljohn]

Rosalie, I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine not knowing. I pray that you will find her sooner than later. ❤️🇨🇦

[@rachll7904]

Most gentle of ((hugs)) ...

[@user-dr4kc3xd2n]

Losing your best friend when you were ten is heartbreaking, especially since your dog vanished with no explanation.

[@lindabryan4759]

Oh wow! I cannot even imagine how that would feel. It’s bad enough when you lose a pet but to lose one and never know what happened. Sounds like someone may have grabbed him. Possibly even the neighbor with the mean remark. That story is so sad in so many ways. 😔🙏🏻 Thank you for what you’re doing for God’s little creatures. I could live there every day. 🥰❤️❤️

[@elizzy8754]

My thought also: someone who knew the return from school routine. Lee doesn't talk about his parents' reaction or any support they did or did not give him. Heartbreakingly sad - no wonder the memory of that day remained deeply buried until now.

[@mtc1801]

Glad you could self reflect to determine where these feelings stem from. Since you didn't have some kind of closure, it may always be a trigger. Just take time to remember the good memories you and your pup had and tell some of those stories here (would love to hear them).❤🐕

[@Yvonneb_]

I had similar happen with my Persian cat years ago. He followed me everywhere he even slept on my bed with me, he never went outside unless I went too but then one day we went to the front of my house because I was cleaning my windows and doors, I went inside just to get a clean cloth and my cat had disappeared. I never saw him again. I was heart-broken, we had him about 3 years my then husband found him in a drain covered in black oil, when I cleaned him we were shocked to find he was pure white apart from a black spot on his head, hence why we called him sooty. We never did find him it was so sad xx

[@lydiapellow9512]

One of the few times in 37 years I have seen my husband cry was when we were hiking with our first two dogs while camping on Utah. This was probably 35 years ago and it was very remote and we had our dogs off leash. Some cows came by (cows in the mountains?) And Berkeley went chasing them, we called and called and she didn't come. My husband was very panicked and thankfully she came running back with her toungue out looking like she had the time of her life. I had never seen him so panicked before and after.

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Lydia how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@robinlowman4493]

Well done Lee, doing the hard work of dealing with trauma, grief & healing.

[@joanhaselman444]

And SHARING, thank you from the bottom of my heart for all that your share with us. Only God knows what an instrument of healing you are to other humans, as well as those fortunate animals who find a home with you. God Bless you and keep you.

[@djtruthbknown9541]

Lee, I can’t image what you could ever have been bullied for and I’m so sorry that happened to you! All I know is since I’ve been watching your videos for a few months now I think you are a prince of a man! When you were relaying what happened to your Bichon, Tarzan, I felt so sad for your “younger self.” I lost my precious Bichon over a year ago and I still cry and miss her desperately every day-Cami was 16 years old and developed a tumor on her spleen. No matter how our precious animals “leave” us it’s devastating. I’m so glad that you now have many babies to love and the unconditional love they give you in return. Bless you and all your precious ones!! I hope to one day visit your beautiful sanctuary…I live right across the river in Vancouver WA! 😀 ♥️🐾♥️🐾♥️

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Dj how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@tessat1656]

I can totally relate - I worry more about my dogs than my kids. I think it's because they can't verbalize.

[@rosemarycatalano2914]

That is such an awful feeling. Years ago my Irish Setter Randy was in our yard in New York, collar on with a large yellow ID tag with our information on it. We put her out there thinking she was safe and it would only be for a short time. Our home was on a busy city street and there were businesses whose yards attached to ours. Randy was very smart but decided to jump the fence into a neighboring yard and ended up getting locked in to one of the businesses basements. We were frantic, searching all night, calling out her name but to no avail. The next morning I hear her whimpering and there she is her body pressing against the fence on our side, she jumped back into our yard.You could see how upset she was. Someone had to have let her out but never bothered to call us. She was such a beautiful girl that I always thought they may have wanted to keep her but Randi knew where the Love was. We were so happy to have her back. So Lee you are not alone in how you feel. I protect my girls like a Mama Lion❤

[@kathe.o.]

Lee, Your Tarzan is waiting for you over the rainbow bridge. All your lost animals are just waiting till your time to cross over comes. BE BLESSED! BLESSED BE!

[@ZionistGundam]

When my dog was a puppy she ran to the road a couple of times and almost got ran over.. now even when she’s an adult, every time the leash fall from my hand I’m getting a small heart attack cause I can’t lose her and i know she like to run after cats to the busy road. Taking care of an child or a pet give a lot of an anxiety but it’s good cause it means you care about it and truly love them ❤️

[@Carol-vv5cm]

I understand Lee. About 4 months ago two of my dogs got out of the fence and I drove all over the city and out in the country side calling for them and searching. I drove until I was exhausted and sick. I had to go home to get my meds. I stayed up All night worried. To add to my anxiety it stormed that night and my dogs have never slept outside. I got a call the next morning....my babies were found. I think I was tired for three days from the anxiety but so grateful to have them home. The guy that brought them home looked sad to give them back but he was great. He had me tell him identifying marks /description of dogs before relinquishing them to me.

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Carol how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@Carol-vv5cm]

@@austinhowland300gmail. Hi.

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

@@Carol-vv5cm Hi where are you from,

[@Carol-vv5cm]

@@austinhowland300gmail. Hi Austin. Do you work at Asher house?? Against my better judgement I will answer a stranger. I'm in TX.

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

@@Carol-vv5cm No I don't I live in Oklahoma city but I'm currently working here in Syria, Are you originally from TX?

[@imogen2092]

Trauma lives in the body. Not being able to find one of your dogs is a trigger. The fact you’re able to process it, to notice it, to give it light is the first step towards recovery.

[@avamarie9541]

Thank you for sharing such an important message- for years I was 100% against getting a dog- when I looked back to my childhood- it was because my Mom had given away my dog without telling me- never had a chance to say goodbye. Happily, having an animal lover daughter forced me to get a dog & the chance to reflect back. I am now a serious dog lover; our 15 yr old cocker spaniel is the boss of me, for sure:)

[@ktinxx]

@Ava Marie I am happy for you! Healing takes time and understanding of the cause of the wound, just like Lee explained. Enjoy!

[@PFCD]

I'm sorry your mother did that to you. That was wrong. But at least you opened your heart to giving another dog the love you have to give as had you not, you and any animals to come would have lost out!

[@frasersgirl4383]

My dad gave away my Beagle Lucky when I was ten years old. He did it while I wasn’t home. I’m almost 63 and I’ve never gotten over it. I’ve had dogs my whole adult life and I’ve never gotten over losing her. I’ve never forgiven him. He’s been gone a long time and I will never forgive him.

[@kimberly4120]

My heart goes out to you. I would find that t would never be able to get over it either. You must have been strong . Thank you for blessing the other dogs in your life. They are loved.

[@lorileeolmsted3869]

@@frasersgirl4383 Sounds like we’ve had a parallel life experience. I was 12, came home from church with my Mom, and my dog didn’t bark with excitement when we drove in, or greet us at the door, and I just had a gut wrenching feeling something was wrong, that he’d (Dad) finally done it. He’d been threatening it for years, because he hated the barking. So I confronted him right away. He ignored me. My mom went to speak with him alone, but I eves dropped. He told her “I got rid of the dog.” I was crushed. I loved that dog, and the dog loved me. She slept in my bed with me. I was just 5 or 6 when we brought her home as a tiny pup. There was not a lot of love in our home when I was growing up, in fact there was a lot of abuse, but the one thing that I could trust was the dog’s love. He took that from me as well. The real sic, grotesque part came that night at supper. Like many kids, I was a picky eater. Mom had made a meat that I didn’t recognize, so I asked what it was. My Dad replied “roasted Shatzey.” I leaped out of my chair gagging, trying not to throw up before I got to the bathroom. I couldn’t eat for a few days. Now, obviously it wasn’t my dog on that meat platter, but I didn’t trust him. Mom came to my room and told me it was a beef roast, tried to smooth it over, but I could tell she’d been upset about it too. I’m so sorry your Dad was an ass. He betrayed you, and your dog. But, like my father, your Dad lost out the most, because they lost the respect of their own daughters.

[@bobbieparks4585]

Lee, thank you for sharing. You mentioned it hurt your feelings, but, in reality ,it hurt your Heart. So thankful that the experience gave you, as the Dog Rescuer you are, a Heart to care about every aspect of your dogs well being and safety. What a gift God has given you.

[@donnamcalpin4910]

Lee this is so powerful. What a great bit of advice for your followers. I love this about you, the way you care about others and of course your animals. You are an amazing, kind person and I’m so sorry your childhood was so traumatic. You could have certainly turned out to be some kind of serial killer with all that you went through but you’ve done the hard and made great choices

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Donna how are you doing today

[@5DNRG]

The way you reacted to your missing pup immediately made me think you endured a childhood trauma. I can relate and it helps to say to yourself, "Everything Always Works Out."

[@lisashepard3883]

I'm so sorry about Tarzan! I was bullied as a kid - through high school, in fact - but especially through 8th grade. I also had a rescue pup as a kid. Hugs.

[@cruising1792]

Firstly, I am sorry you were bullied. I know how that feels. Secondly, Iam so sorry about Tarzan. That must have been so traumatic for you, especially as a child. Anxiety is awful but there are ways to combat it. I hope that sharing this experience with us helps you deal with the panic you feel when you lose sight of your dogs. I am a fair bit older than you, but I admire and respect your openness and emotional maturity. As for your advice about asking ourselves some questions, I have been doing that for a while. Now to find a way to face the answers xx

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi my friend how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@fibrowarriors]

Hi Lee I truly admire you and everything you do for all the animals. Sending you peace and love from the 🇬🇧 ❤️

[@lauramyers7926]

34 years ago one of my dogs vanished and I never saw her again. She was just gone and I never knew what happened to her. I have an anxiety disorder, and all I could do was think of all the terrible things that could have happened to her. I still do and have to work hard to break the cycle of cognitive distortion. I am also hypervigilant about where my dogs are inside a well-fenced yard. I would rather die than have it happen again. Good advice Lee and keep up the positive energy.

[@mamalupine7604]

To lose a dog that suddenly and completely is horrible. I love the fact that all of my dogs are microchipped now so that no matter what happens I will at least know where they are or what happened to them. We had border Collies when my children were younger and one of them just went into the woods to die when her time came and it was heartbreaking but she just needed her alone time and she passed very quietly. We found her very shortly thereafter and she is buried with all of our other beloved pets on the property. God bless you Lee, and all of the other dog lovers who enjoy the Asher house videos so very much. Thank you for all you do, for all that you and your pack do to make the days better.

[@finflwr]

Thanks for sharing that. Tbh, I feel that a loss like that, where there is no closure, can be worse than the death of a pet. I've lost two cats like that and they were the worst. A huge amount of guilt seems to come along with it due to the unknown factor, not knowing if they're ok, what happened to them. Well done on the realization.

[@lynn2574]

I know that feeling. I have a lot of abandonment issues due to the situation as an infant, and get that same feeling when my daughter disappears from sight. I’m glad you were able to identify the source moment. I’d also put money on the mean neighbor having nabbed Tarzan.

[@paulinefollett3099]

When I was a kid our dog saw a rabbit and jumped out of the trailer and got concussion and ran away despite our calling to her. I was so upset and could not stop crying. But a miracle happened. A week later a farmer found her and contacted us. We got her back. I was so happy but I would get anxious when ever I heard this one song that I had heard when she was missing. To this day I can't listen to it without crying.

[@wendyzeigler597]

I can't imagine what that must have been like for you as a 10 year old. What a mystery that exists still to this day.

[@Walua]

You are just the most amazing human being. I can’t imagine people not surrounding you and loving you your whole life. I’m glad you are loved by many now. What a terrible experience with your dear Tarzan. So traumatizing. And so mysterious.

[@Becca_2828]

You just broke my heart. My childhood dog was my rock, companion and confidante I couldn't imagine her not walking by my side back then. Things happen to us to makes us stronger and better people.

[@roseangela2797]

A genuine MAN is in touch with the gifts of the soul which are memory, intellect, will and imagination...rest in GOD'S love and care for you.

[@cindyrowe3535]

God has a special purpose for you & you are in HIS care doing what GOD created you to do... To take care of HIS creatures with ALL that special LOVE that overflows from that ENORMOUS heart of yours!!!🐶🛐✝️💜

[@lorij9649]

Dear Lee, Oh my goodness. How traumatic and what a shock to your entire heart and being that your dog vanished. Like the Bermuda Triangle or a neighbor stole it. And having no idea and like abra cadabra, the dog disappears. Horrible. Devastating. Like a kidnapping but the dog could not scream. I am so sorry you have had to endure this pain for so long.

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Lori how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@Goose00123]

❤ It’s good you found that memory to pin point that anxiety. Crazy how our brains work

[@aratliff727]

I understand completely. I was bullied a lot too by the older boys in my neighborhood. At the time I had a chow/golden retreiver mix. One day these boys ran up on me when I was 11 and pinned me to the ground and one had climbed on top of me. I yelled for my mom a few times, my dog Sara and come to the gate barking ferociously. That dog jumped the chain link fence and went straight for these boys and scared them away. I loved that dog and had never felt more protected. My grandma from Texas came to visit and one day while I was at school she took my dog to the pound and surrenedered her. I put up signs and searched for her for a month before my grandma finally confessed to my parents what she did. It was too late. They had put my sweet pup down. I was devasated and never really continued a relationship with my grandma after that. I really appreciate your content, Lee. Not only for the dogs, but for the nuggets of gold you give for emotional and mental support too. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

[@sheilawhatley572]

I recently had a similar realization for something that gives me anxiety. Not as traumatic but had a big impact as a child that bled into adulthood. And having that recognition has really lessened that particular anxiety. I’m so sorry you had that experience as a child.

[@lorij9649]

Rich Roll has a new podcast out called "How To Face and Heal The Trauma That Dictates Your Life" with Paul Conti MD. He says Trauma is SOMETHING happened which could be acute or could have happened overtime that OverWhelms Our Coping Mechanisms and leaves us different as we move forward. He says there is actually a change in the brain.

[@lisabocian3928]

That's so awesome you are dealing with your anxiety in such a healthy way, you are an inspiration 💜

[@cocolocowalter]

I’m so sorry to hear that story . The loss of your beloved Tarzan has surely shaped and defined you as a more compassionate person. And look where you are now- saving dogs and encouraging thousands upon thousands of people, who watch your stories unfold. God bless you Lee! 🙏✝️💟

[@deedee9355]

Sometimes we have to go back to move forward. If we don't deal with these feelings when they come up and figure out where they originated, they will forever haunt us. Good work Lee.

[@SweetColo]

Gosh, you telling this story gave me anxiety . I can’t imagine 😢. Sounds like someone kidnapped him. Losing a pet, a family member which gave you such joy is a horrible experience. God bless you for sharing this❤

[@marshaholly9891]

That trauma is REAL. having a pet lost is horrible. My german shepherd ran away during fireworks, lost for 3 days, I was sick with worry, then one day>here she comes, running up the street. But for those 3 days, wow what a hopeless feeling. Your story of losing Tarzan, broke my heart. So sorry you had that happen.

[@barbaraleibowitz4006]

LEE. YOU MUST READ THIS. It’s Barbara from your hometown!! Loved you as a kid and remember your joy and craziness with Tarzan. Guess what, love u now even more! How proud I am of you! Mensch!!!! Would love a chat.

[@juliecarmichael7949]

You are a wonderful person, Lee! You are committed to giving all of the rescue babies at the sanctuary the best life possible. Thank you for sharing this memory! You are continuing to grow and be who you need to be! Love from myself and my three rescue babies in southern China!

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Julie. how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@juliecarmichael7949]

@@austinhowland300gmail. Nice to meet you, too! Life is great! I hope you are doing well! :D :D

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

@@juliecarmichael7949 Yes I'm well thanks, Where are you from?

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

@@juliecarmichael7949 Hi Julie where are you from?

[@juliecarmichael7949]

@@austinhowland300gmail. I'm from the US but have lived in southern China for over a decade. How about you?

[@rhonaherrman704]

Hi Lee. First let me express my gratitude for all the wonderful work you’re doing for the animals. If I were young (I’m 75), I would love to be doing something as wonderful as you’re doing. I’m a lifelong animal lover and have been involved with rescues for the last 20 years. I appreciate your candor and your willingness to share so many details about yourself. You’re a real person whose honesty is greatly appreciated. I look forward to every video you post. Thank you!!!!!

[@michelleferranti9468]

You are a parent…pure & simple. I’m so sorry for your loss of Tarzan

[@jayden-michelle3459]

My mom made me give my dog, 8yrs I had her, to a vet to be euthanized she told me just because we were moving to another state and downsizing! I lost all my respect, the idea that she is a responsible person, and lost myself because I told my mom I would walk her etc. It was my Senior year of highschool and I had a break at lunch to let her out. This dog was abandoned and to this day it kills my heart but, I remember our time together "Tara" was my best friend and I had the chance to love 9dogs at once - some have a lot of Love to spread around and the space. I never forget anything about each one of them but, being forced to abandon your bestest buddy is always hard when you respect your responsibility to be a responsible owner. My dad gave her to me and I could tell he didn't want to give up on her either. You are great at getting to the heart ❤️ of your matters! Keep it up, it helps others just as you help these dogs. Their responsibility is you! Lol🤗

[@jamitripe459]

I'm so sorry that happened to you as a child. I panic when I can't find one of my animals too. We had a little poodle mix my dad rescued when I was 5, and a few years later someone stole him right off our patio. So I totally understand the panic and fear . Sending lots of hugs to you and the animals 🙂👍💗💗💗💗

[@janicehales2958]

That's the same panic all mother's feel when their child disappears from view in a store or playground for a second. It's a full on panic attack and the adrenaline that is released in your body just wears you out afterwards. We either get mad and paddle their bottom, hug them way too tightly or go home and have a good cry just to feel normal again. Either way it because we love something so much it scares us!

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Janice 👋 how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@teresanagengast3860]

It's a normal reaction and when you didn't see one of your babies, you panic. I do the same thing with my babies and your loss of your dog as a child is traumatic. Your the best dad ever. Stay strong!

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Teresa how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@OscarsWilde]

I would love to hug that poor heartbroken bewildered little boy who I'm sure just hoped against all hopes that his boy would turn up for the longest time, as suddenly as he disappeared 💔

[@annsmith4739]

That’s terrible Lee ,I don’t know how you ever get over that ,I can truly understand your Anxiety 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[@sandravanduinwyk3594]

The same thing happened to my husband he owned a black Labrador named Josh. One day he just vanished. My husband searched everywhere all the kennels just everywhere and josh was never found. My husband still talks about it to this day 😢 Hopefully you will find 🕊️

[@bronte346]

That really broke my heart and made me think of a trauma about my dog when I was 8 years old during the 60s and we had our German Shepard sleep in the garage. Sometimes when we put him to bed, he would whine but we just say ok King, go to bed. Apparently, that night he had gotten out and he was never in the garage but at our front door asking to come back in. We didn’t check until the morning and we never saw our dear King again. At 64 I still hold that guilt and I still shed tears when I think he must have thought we no longer wanted him. My way with dogs changed after that. They slept in the house and in our rooms and I we always checked on them prior to going to sleep. I never deny a worry about my animal family, and I know it stems from that day. Thank you for sharing and thank you for all you do.

[@nancysarver8120]

That explains the feeling perfectly. Your loss at 10 years old doesn't feel any better now years later. It's the not knowing where Tarzan went that is most disturbing. That never goes away.

[@beverlyrussell1586]

Breaks my heart. I have dreams about losing my dog's. Not always the same dog. Great anxiety. Blessings to you.

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Beverly how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@jackallen9045]

Lee, by connecting your memory as a 10 year old, means that you made the connection beautifully to your anxiety…. Now you will heal 😊

[@ositagordita8550]

Several years back, about a decade, I was interviewed by a psychiatrist as part of my application for disability. My once productive self that volunteered heavily & was always out & about, had begun to shutdown, making everyday life more difficult. It was during that one/only session with that doctor that I had an epiphany. Those bad dreams & sometimes nightmares that I had, stemmed from something bad that had happened to me back in the mid-80s. All of a sudden, I stated, "OH my Lord, it was a setup. I see it so clearly now. After all these years." At that point, I was dumbfounded. After all these years, hindsight had allowed me to see what I could not see as a young adult. I will never forget that day at the doctor's office. In conclusion, I know EXACTLY what you mean. ✌️🐾🙏

[@donnajohnson2597]

It’s called parent anxiety when you loose sight of your child. ❤

[@cindyrowe3535]

Welcome to parenthood!!! Even tho they have fur... You're still a parent & fear & anxiety still hit us when we can't see them & YES, they have SELECTIVE HEARING also!!! Just breathe!!! 🤗Bless you Lee

[@charrski2918]

Mine comes from abandonment issues which manifested into anxiety but prayer and my trust in Jesus has made me transform this behavior 10 fold. I trust in Jesus and He gives me peace.

[@antonellaalberico2904]

Lee I feel your pain because when I was 9 my dog chubby ran out of the house. My mom was mopping so she had the door open. I woke up calling my dog and he never came back. I cried for days. I have a dog now and I keep a close on her always. Love u Lee. Hugs Always.

[@spencernimmons3700]

Lee, says a lot! I had a purebred Irish setter puppie "Shannon", who had epilepsy. Anyway, having to put her down is still traumatic in my life and I still think of her to this day. Much love to you and the pack

[@snappykrab]

Thanks for sharing this story. It’s always great to take a look at one’s triggers and feelings. We carry stuff that we’ve buried from childhood and bring it with us.

[@austinhowland300gmail.]

Hi Deborah how are you doing today, it's nice to meet you here on KZbin

[@user-kr8di9fl5u]

I have a 10lb mini dox. One day I came home from work and he was gone. He'd found a hole in the fence my Mastiff had made. My dogs have a doggy door to outside while i work. I cried for 3 days looking for him. It was cold and rainy and he is a shy dog. I knew he wouldnt come to anyone. Then I decided to walk my Mastiff down our main rd and back n the neighborhood to see if Shelley could pick up Groot's scent. I saw this suggestion online in my research. Next morning about 6am my hubs comes running in the bedroom shouting, Shelley's home! He found his way back! My baby and I were reunited and now I check the fence regularly! I know that panicked feeling. I never want to feel it again. Im so sorry about Tarzan..Im glad you have babies to heal your heart and make you laugh everyday.

[@phineaspepper3530]

I'm so sorry. I lost my dog Caesar who was a doberman pincher when I was in middle school. I don't know if he was stolen or ran over. We never found him. I have dreamed of him off and on for years. I have hope I will see him again in heaven one day. He was so gentle and sweet. He would chase down a bunny and lick it. I would get off the bus, and he would run at me and jump on me and knock me down. It was gut wrenching, and I think about it ever so often. I loved that dog.

[@reginajohnson2218]

Sad story Lee. I don’t understand why you were bullied. You have such a great personality. I was t bullied but just couldn’t seem to make friends. I was always alone. I ad ire you for the work you are doing and how you treat your animals.

[@connielahman5725]

I’m so sorry that happened to you. Gosh how in the world did that sweet baby disappear in that short of time. It is no wonder you feel anxiety when a dog is missing a few minutes. I didn’t have any experiences like yours but if my two girls are out of my sight even a second I go in panic mode.They are our children so it is no brainer when it comes to feeling the that emotion.💗

[@gmurph2055]

We have a bichon/maltese cross, a little girl named Williow. She is only turned one. But she is exactly like that with my son, great friend. We are very enclosed so she can’t run out but when she sees him come home from school she just sniffs and wags her tail by the door, gives him the best welcome home and makes him feel like a prince has finally arrived. My son would be socially awkward due to a learning disability and she is just his best friend… she is just precious. So thanks for the advice.