I was a slave to my traditional husband!

[@SusanHamer]

So the church didn't care if you worked. They didn't care that you were Non Trad. They just didn't want you to have the means to leave.

[@burntblonde2925]

Mormon church in a nutshell and the church are greedy

[@mermaidmarina2411]

Yeah. The cult obviously doesn't want you to leave the cult.

[@nevergiveup9937]

Exactly. It's always like this.

[@burntblonde2925]

@ I’m so glad the Mormon Church is coming to light for their toxicity and throw greed, in there too

[@profoundintrovert]

Call it what it is. Financial and economic abuse.

[@LandonStrauss-hc1sc]

Trafficking, human trafficking.

[@Erintii]

Tradition is opression. All the best for your new life.

[@cheetavontiebolt9971]

Keep fun tradiions disguard thosr that are opressive

[@davidmuller1958]

yeaaaa go sleep around!!!!!!

[@Erintii]

@@cheetavontiebolt9971 which are fun for women?

[@TraitorHater]

Tradition is just peer pressure from dead people

[@Erintii]

@cheetavontiebolt9971 which are fun for women,

[@jo-annmcintyre7717]

The lesson is: DON"T TRUST. Protect yourself ladies.......

[@cheery-hex]

the lesson is... don't take others' experiences and apply them to your own life and beliefs

[@cmrsnowflake]

I also want to acknowledge here that a lot of single moms, if they had a condition that sent them to the hospital several times a year, would have lost their kids to CPS by now. And would not be able to maintain consistent phone and internet access. This story plays out constantly in colonized and minoritized communities. Internal abuse leads to even more punishment by external society. So thank you Jenny for warning women everywhere not to give men the benefit of sacrificing your own safety net. There is no true love or romance that would be ruined or threatened by you retaining your basic rights to your money, your labor,your body.

[@lifetaketwo7662]

Thanks for the is excellent comment

[@jjohnson796]

Jake is still trying to excercise some measure of control in your life. Next time you see your daughter ask to just look at the albums, take photos of them all with your phone and upload them to a page only you have access to. Jake sounds like he is less than useless. Able bodied and hasn’t worked in 6 years? You are so very lucky you got away from him.

[@christian1172-z9e]

One thing that shocked me when I actually started reading then Bible with my own eyes, was that there were so many working women in the Bible. Ironically, Paul, the one everyone likes to quote to keep “women in their place” was open about the fact that ladies were financially supporting him out of their own money.

[@LoveLife-oo9cz]

Oh my gosh that sounds disgusting. I can never finish the Bible. Through I believe in God and Bible is manmade. No wonder my instincts tell me to stay away from religious, God-fearing scam artists.

[@teresahegerich8835]

Yes! Then there is the Proverbs 31 woman. She worked, not just at home, but she traded in the marketplace. That's why I will NEVER understand how so many churches created, yes, created a doctrine that says women cannot work outside the home. I find that ridiculously offensive, and extremely short sighted because women STILL outlive men.

[@jezeannwilliams1145]

Even better, he emphasized that single women were valued more because of their freedom to do whatever they wanted with regards to building the church/spreading the Gospel. He saw marriage as a solution for men and women who were unable to control their lust. He also held the belief that those folks should marry each other and leave the women and men who chose to remain single alone😂😂

[@hemanthkurthamile4330]

A marriage like this seems so crazy. You give everything and geht nothing in return. He can dangle the fact that it's his and not your name on the Bank account over your head at any time. And maybe the worst of it, he doesn't seem to appreciate anything that you did and wants to make your life as difficult as possible.

[@ZachDift-kc4nk]

This was most women’s life experience in America before 1974 - women were not even allowed to open a bank account t without her husbands permission and he could withdraw his permission. Feminism gets a bad rep but this was what feminists initially was railing against - how women were so horrifically controlled and oppressed by their husbands and society. wife beating was still legal in some states until the 1970s - literally a woman could call the cops bc her husband was beating her and the cops would refuse to come help her bc it was a family issue and not a criminal offense. Marital r*pe was also legal in many states until the 1980s. Basically women were second class citizens and feminists fought against that injustice. Mormons are stuck in the 1950s

[@lisanicolette5237]

My mother had serious health problems and was in the hospital many times when I was a small child. Thankfully, my grandparents took care of me and I had an awesome uncle who helped. You need a strong network and we had this. So many single mom's suffer without the resources they need to survive.

[@jo-annmcintyre7717]

You have sooo much talent, skills, trade and business sense. What you know/built is NOT learned in schools only. It makes me angry at persons/potential employers, that they did not recognize this when he left. I would be FURIOUS TOO!!

[@timrob87]

Hi, Jenny! Love your channel! I’m stopping by this video just to see if you’ve ever heard of a song called “Not Gon’ Cry” by singer Mary J. Blige; it’s an r&b song from 1995 & it was on the soundtrack of a 1995 movie called “Waiting to Exhale.” It expresses very much the kind of situation you were in during your marriage. The song was a HUGE HIT of that year & it parallels the story of one of the women in the movie. It can be cathartic in an enormous way & satisfying validating to hear a song or read a book or watch a movie, so I’m just asking you to check out the song-& if you’re interested, check out the movie too! You might just say, “OMG, this type of situation has been the story of SO many women like me.” Keep on keeping on. You’re doing wonderfully in the second act of your life.

[@Shelby-s2w]

Yes the wife was played by Angela Bassett and she was phenomenal

[@dramatriangle]

Thank you for warning people about this!

[@stephaniejohnson7861]

Thank you for sharing your story. It takes immense courage and bravery to be open about your life and experiences. Sending love and luck in your new endeavors! ❤❤❤

[@lifetaketwo7662]

Thanks, it means a lot!

[@mlemay2486]

Your circumstances keep beating you down, but you’re amazingly strong and resourceful! I believe in you! Your children are so lucky to have you and you will figure everything out. Sending you all of my positive thoughts

[@cmrsnowflake]

Anoxic brain injury sounds to me like ... strangulation. It's a little hard for me to listen to this story because the amounts of wealth implied at every point are ... like the opportunities they represent are so painfully out of reach for me and for many people. And it's very frustrating to be on the outside of wasp/Mormon wealth culture where "working hard" is a cultural value such that people who have wealth always feel like they're earning it, and people who don't are always working just as much without ever being able to have an LLC, a truck, an employee, the supplies to flip a house. Wage money is not the same thing as asset money, and people on both sides of the gap are blinded to the structural difference by these cultural smokescreens. So to have had that access to real wealth, and then like be tricked into just working for free by a stupid ideology. It's so upsetting on so many levels.

[@lifetaketwo7662]

I agree completely.

[@electricbrighto625]

I'm very curious to hear about your story in divorce court. I live in Massachusetts and the courts here would settle a case like yours very strongly in your favor. I'm assuming you got divorced in Utah, which must be very "conservative"

[@teresahegerich8835]

New Jersey as well.

[@berklia]

Also super confused for same reason. My sister got divorced in Arizona & the judge forced her ex to give her all cars, huge amounts of alimony, health insurance & most of his retirement. My sister’s ex also tried to hide $ but it did not matter - because once he tried that game, all his bank accounts are now debited directly by the courts. Why didn’t the judge for Jake do the same thing? My sister also has 4 children & was married 24 years.

[@LaurenBuckley-r5b]

Depends on the judge. I just finalized my divorce in Massachusetts a couple months ago, and was glad my ex and I had reached agreements on everything because everyone knows the judge to be very father-favoring.

[@marym922]

Please don't use the term 'conservative' when you actually mean demonic. Seriously, there is NOTHING Christ-like about abandoning your family. As you can read in 1st Timothy 5:8 "But if any provide not for his own, and especially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith and is worse than an infidel." (Utah is primarily Mormon, one of their more famous 'prophets' is also known as "bring-em young".....ex Mormons, especially the ones who've converted to Biblical Christianity have loads to say about the very, very strange history of that group, and the founding of it.) I'm glad she has a movie coming, hopefully that will end her financial woes.

[@Spasiuka]

When I hear you I always remember of Gisele Bethea, a very gifted mormon ballet dancer! At age 15 or 16 years old, she was hired by the prestigious american ballet company... But at only 18 years old she quit... to get married and to be a housewife and a mother. The ballet world lost a star... because mormon faith doesn't see with good eyes that a wife can work outside the home... Of course, these are my 5 scents. That ex dancer never spoke about it... But following her Insta account we can be aware of the pain she had for not dancing...

[@cheetavontiebolt9971]

Marie osmond continued to preform

[@Karen-b3b1f]

@@cheetavontiebolt9971When someone is a big celebrity they make exceptions for them. They like the publicity.

[@Himmiefan]

Same story with Ballerina Farm.

[@teresahegerich8835]

​@@cheetavontiebolt9971She sure did. Apparently through her second marriage, because he wasn't.

[@kf1439]

I don't think you are giving yourself enough credit. If one guy that you interviewed with laughs at you, that makes him a misogynistic a-hole. It doesn't mean that you don't deserve credit for starting and running a business. I really hope the best for you going forward.

[@hpm9703]

Yes, yes, yes!!!! Please make a list of all the jobs you accomplished and the skills you employed. Please stare at that list and ask yourself why you can’t start and run a business. You don’t need permission from them to succeed; you are already a star.

[@mikalin9286]

Yeah hearing that story ?? It’s was like girl it sounds like that man if he has a wife is probably treating her like shit. “Just Jake’s wife…”? Yeah because all wives basically run a business on top of motherhood.

[@teresahegerich8835]

​@@mikalin9286I hate that was said to her.

[@tdbarton7712]

I want to offer one example of a traditional marriage that was ended by divorce. A couple very close to me broke up. The woman was a trad wife (not Mormon) while the man worked. Their assets were split 50/50. His income potential was higher than hers so he paid her more than the court-appointed amount to insure the children and their mother lived in a nice apartment. The ex-wife was put through 6 years of college paid for by the ex-husband. His philosophy was that she invested her prime college years into caring for the family and home, and this was the right thing to do. Further, he felt that it was an investment in his children, that with a college degree the ex-wife would be less dependent upon him, she'd have higher self-esteem, be an example for the kids, and be able to support herself. I know this is extremely rare but it did take place and everyone is the better for the absence of acrimony and generosity in the difficulty of a divorce.

[@burntblonde2925]

You didn’t receive a paycheck, no rights to the business, and no social security

[@teresahegerich8835]

That! The only thing she might be entitled to are spousal benefits from Social Security. And that's only equal to half of his monthly payment. And no Medicare either.

[@victoriak1219]

Good for you girl. You’re smart.

[@stviz87]

This is why nobody except your spouse should talk to you about having a job, even then if you dont want to they should not force you. If an old guy told me i should hand my side of the business to my spouse I'd tell him to sit on it and spin because that is trash advice

[@serenajoyner2808]

You mentioned in one of your other videos he hasnt really worked the last six years while married to the schoolteacher. I bet if some sort of a forensic audit was performed you would find he probably hid alot of this money in offshore accounts and around in large volumes of untraceable cash that he still probably accesses currently. I cant even wrap my head around this kind of money and these types as businesses as another previous poster cited. I was in the wage earner category. We almost never cleared more then about 60K together with my small business and his SSI. He sat at home while I worked. When he was gone, one thing changed, we lost a third of our family income but we had more money! I was used to being poor my whole so it didnt really impact us much when we divorced. Narcissists love to spend their money and your money, which is their money! Gosh knows I sure dont miss paying for his three packs of cigarettes a day lol. But it sounds like you are finally back on track to success with your name on the bank account this time which is awesome :)

[@ms_cartographer]

He literally stole from you. He's absolutely evil.

[@adarsheikh-ali9290]

Many of us have a some problems but we don’t have a courage to talk or to fight for our rights

[@marenernst1841]

Obediance is over rated.

[@taracorley3291]

I am so very sorry this happened to you. Thank you for educating us.

[@cedarforest4621]

My mom was a single mom, and we were dirt poor. Her mom was a single mom, and they were dirt poor. I decided at a young age, that I would always be able to support myself, and was the first person to put myself through college and become an engineer. I got the "A man is not a plan" from every part of my growing up. My dad never paid one penny of child support.

[@techiebliss]

When I told my ex I wanted to go into engineering he made an ugly face and said “Nahh that’s more for men.” I couldn’t believe my ears! Then come to find out our neighbor across the street was finishing up the engineering program herself, and as a mom with a nice husband who was actually supportive and proud of her. I should’ve known I had trash then.

[@filobetobaby]

I'm glad you're finding your voice here, lots of people pulling for you!

[@ladyoftheflowers44]

Bless you for speaking up We need to mobilize off of Tik tok now that it’s being taken away

[@ms_cartographer]

Girlie. You should renew your CDL. You can make $30 an hour, or more driving a dump truck in a lot of states!

[@cookymarie82]

That's wretched, here you are this genuis entrepreneur & nothing to show for it since it all went to your husband (& whatever women he felt like seeing.)

[@techiebliss]

Male monotheism was created for this exact reason. That’s why so many men were easily persuaded to abandon the mother god.

[@SassySandra01]

Regardless of what you thought or your religion ITS THE LAW!!!

[@Spasiuka]

good work!!!

[@kiarntz]

Thanks for sharing❣️

[@mandyrintala75]

So sorry for this horrible situation you found yourself in with this monster. I’m a stay at home mom homeschooling my four kids married to a very loving supportive husband. I have always been involved in our finances and our main account he probably doesn’t even know the username or password too. Not because I won’t tell him but because he doesn’t care to have access cause he will ask me if he needs to know anything about it. To say women should never rely on a man is fear mongering in my personal experience. I rely on my husband for his love, finances and trust. But I’m also not being abused by him either, physically, emotionally or financially. So if any of those things apply to the man YOU picked, ya get the heck out and figure out how to support yourself.

[@phyllisbooth3395]

Jenny, please stop saying you do not have skills. You have TONS of skills! Few people can manage all of what you have spent a lifetime of managing. Everyday validate that you are a super strong woman who can manage and thrive without any man. YOU CAN. YOU are already a TREMENDOUS SUCCESS. And those photo albums are YOURS. Not your daughter's and not your husband's. YOU created them. Demand them back. Wishing you the very best.

[@rebeccacampbell585]

Every mother has tons of skills. Yes jenny did a lot and really does have a lot of skills. But its not on paper and there is no history proving it, therefore it doesn't exist. That's the problem with all trad wives trying to earn money later.

[@phyllisbooth3395]

@@rebeccacampbell585 There are way to get around this though. A skills resume and using certain words that computers scanning the resume respond too. Jenny and other women like her are incredibly talented with their obvious management skills that most any employer would be thrilled to hire. I know many at home Moms who have bypassed the mountain that is unfortunately there to block them, including my own mother. So I respectfully disagree with you but acknowledge that it is tough.

[@dinaboop]

You're selling it pretty hard, dang! I'm a straight female but where can I get me a trad wife lol

[@izy0321]

Ok this is way more than personal assistant. You have so much business experience!

[@KWilliams-y2g]

I worked for free in my marriage for 10 years, home builders. I painted, laid tile, laid sod, cleaned the sites, paid the bills, the list goes on and on. He did very little and zero manual labor. He would watch me work at times or just wasn’t there at all. I worked long hours but was never paid, never paid into social security etc. My preacher told me this was the way it is. I made a commitment to marry and deal with it (not Mormon). Later I got OUT! I left with NOTHING. Went back to school, worked three jobs and was able to rebuild my life and raised my son. It was hard but I’m on the other side now.

[@Ellehcareidnam]

Are your kids still close to your ex? Did they “side” with him and that’s why they’re keeping your photos? He seems the type to manipulate and triangulate that way.

[@LuckyOtter_WorldBuilding]

this makes the way gong ho attitude alot of divorced trad husbands have twords their wife and kids, like "why should i give her MY hard earned money" seem incredibly un-greatful, cuz it wasnt all his money, since you invested in the windshields business, and of course helped build them up

[@joerudnik9290]

This situation definitely seems to be one where ‘barefoot and pregnant’ fits the description. The women are not to be independent, whatsoever. This hurts the ‘breadwinner’ also. He also gets all the power, to implode his family, if he wishes.

[@marquitaarmstrong399]

Am not trying to down you. Am sorry if I offended. You are strong spirit shining through.🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@theresaeliasen7061]

That said, I do feel for you and I do think the Mormon representatives you dealt with, and the organization who supported your home wedding experience is to blame for quite a bit of your prolonged pain I know you are grateful for your children and I am grateful you got something good out of the suffering you were caused, through the fault of your own

[@terryhenderson424]

You should try to find the book titled something like the "Nineteenth Wife"; idea,,y an edition with all the footnotes et al.

[@davidhutchinson5233]

Why your husband left is beyond me. You are a caring Mother, smart business woman and stunningly beautiful. He's nuts IMO

[@kacrichton4434]

He was probably jealous, and knew he was not good enough for her

[@EnnVee959]

As I understand it, she told her husband she wanted divorce, and then instead of going through divorce proceedings correctly, he abandoned her at that time by ending their condo lease, liquidating all investments and accounts, quitting his job and taking off. She had nothing in her own name at all.

[@arlett6477]

I hope it’s fair to say I am horrified… 😶

[@justhereforagoodtime88]

Have you thought about going back and getting your CDL A license? I know you work multiple jobs now and maybe you could stilll keep them as gigs, but most truck drivrs make good money and seems to be pretty lucrative

[@lifetaketwo7662]

I just signed on a movie and a book, plus a professional podcast. I still have kids at home and need to work from home.

[@carenlzarate8603]

I grow up Christian and even the mentality of them is the same like the sermons talk about this can't have separate accounts and all that stuff but in reality makes women way more vulnerable and more likely to end up abused and used. Me with a narcissist for 10 years. And ohh my iam broke and in debt he used my credit ruined it, ask my parents for money he hasn't paid, and so much more, cheated abused. And just emotional destruction foe my soul. So much he hates me or hated me while he was living his double lifes. I can keep going is sad for us. 3 daughters and he did not even got a life insurance or anything. Not even bought a house

[@carenlzarate8603]

We started a party rentals and first he was going to help but eventually he just let me do it alone, pregnant and with a handyman but it was not easy I was pregnant and then had that baby then I was pregnant 10 months after so I end up dropping this because also he wanted it to breed St. Bernard and we did foe few years alot of cleaning and work, all the house chores where done by me. Clothes, groceries, dr. Appointment, everything was done by me all he did was complaining and abusing me just for anything. Typical Narcissist. So is been hard I been trying to start something but I need to change some habits and set boundaries, claim my power back , and DECENTER MEN. I JUST LEARN THAT TOO.

[@GoKU-xx2vg]

Sounds like she puts more importance on money than family. Hopefully she stays single with her money and happy.

[@salivadriven]

I have to ask; did you not all watch The Handmaids Tale?!

[@lesleyperetto3770]

How do you not have the skills? You just listed a whole bunch of skills.

[@iknowyouwanttofly]

What do you think about haveing a small at home daycare to be abel to be home with kids and have a part time income?

[@RobbinFlowers]

What do you think?

[@teresahegerich8835]

Jenn, I am pretty offended for you at the "you're just Jake's wife" comment made to you. You were never "just" a wife, or "just" a mother, or "just a homemaker". You were then and are now a person of worth as you are!

[@lifetaketwo7662]

@@teresahegerich8835 thanks for saying so, you’re right.

[@SassySandra01]

How was your husband of all those years able to get away with taking everything from you and not have to pay you alimony and you not get his pension or half if it regardless, cause as long as you guys were married he has no choice and if you have custody what about child support? But at tge very least by law they are required to maintain the same or equivalent lifestyle you had been living? By law he can’t just leave you destitute.

[@whiteroses7515]

Why did you all have so many businesses over the years? Was your husband ADHD perhaps? Mentally ill? It sounds almost manic to have so many businesses going on for one family.

[@BlackberryTitties]

Multiple Incomes, Resources. Everyone who has money start with a few businesses. That’s how you make money!!

[@lifetaketwo7662]

He’s mentally ill. But also, we had a diverse portfolio.

[@whiteroses7515]

@@lifetaketwo7662 A diverse portfolio would be investing in a business, not working in it full time. Your husband just sounds like he got in "states" and went full in on one scheme after another.

[@cl5470]

​@@whiteroses7515 Mormonism is all about money because 10% of the earnings of members in good standing goes directly to the church. Mormons are encouraged to help each other succeed so more money comes in. It's why Mormons are so into MLMs. The religious community puts a big emphasis on financial success.

[@christinejones4785]

Yes there are plenty of manics who are highly successful

[@patriciabritton5917]

As you talk about this it does seem odd that you were taken off of everything. There is no where in the Bible that says because the man is the head of the household that the wife can not work or that the wife should not be on the bank accounts or business. My husband and i are together on things the house the cars the bills. We are both accountable to each other. So he knows the finances and so do I. So this sounded like in the Mormon church that they were teaching men to control their wives. The Bible talks about wives being submissive to their husbands but so many take that out of context. Also husband are supposed to love their wives as Christ loved the church. Which that more mean loving them respecting them. Not cheating on them or being abusive to them. So I am sorry so much junk happened to you . I have listened to some of your other videos. I for sure can tell you that scripture was being taken out of context. The creator of the universe loves all of us and for your husband to walk out on you and leave you with nothing is not the way God would of wanted you to be treated. I do not believe in the teachings of the Mormon church. Honestly the Bible is the truth and that is what we are suppose to go to for wisdom. Thank you for sharing. I think there are many in our world that do not realize what goes on in some peoples lives. Also in some cultures in our world women are looked at as property not a individual that God created with purpose and Talents.

[@barbaradiaz345]

Does this make you think different of the Mormon church ⛪️? Are you still a member?

[@marquitaarmstrong399]

Am xlds convert Had two abusive husbands. Come from background of strong African American Queens. Your husband should have been married to one of us for 5 minutes. Gave my hubbies ultimatum. Get out or wish you had. Nuff sed

[@MPS0007]

Was there no child support or alimony ?

[@techiebliss]

To hell with child support. We all need to start doing 50/50 custody.

[@MPS0007]

@ that’s generally the agreement between normal couples. But in situations like this it rarely works as one parent doesn’t see parenting as their responsibility. Forcing 50/50 would only end in neglect of said children. The problem isn’t just the system it’s the trad wife set up and mentality. I remember helping parents who were petitioning the court for primary or sole custody after they found that the father would either dump them at someone’s home or leave them alone to fend for themselves during their time with them. They weren’t interested in parenting but wanted 50/50 for monetary reasons.

[@techiebliss]

@@MPS0007 Then they should go to jail for neglect. We can’t just keep catering to them like children as if “Oh, well they don’t want custody, so we’ll just give them their way or the children will suffer.” Children are already suffering when Mom is burnt out and depressed.

[@MPS0007]

@ do you think she wasn’t burnt out when she was doing all the child rearing when they were married? Iv yet to see anyone successfully force a neglectful parent to parent. At best you can make them at least pay which is hard to do when they’re in jail. I don’t like it either but this is what these trad wife relationships expose women and children to. I’m happy that at least women are sharing their stories and exposing the reality of these types of relationships and how vulnerable they make women to abuse if their spouse is prone to it.

[@techiebliss]

@@MPS0007 I don’t think you’re comprehending my comment properly.

[@patriciabritton5917]

Truly if you were doing all that you did then your name should of been on those businesses. There was nothing wrong with you both being on the business you were working it with him. I think there is nothing wrong at all for a wife to be a stay home wife. Yet the wife should be on bank accounts , know what is coming into the house be respected loved. God does love the homemaker and also loves the woman who works outside the home . The issue was your church taught the wrong doctrine and sadly when churches do that then people will turn away from God and God is not the one who did anything wrong. There are many false religions out there in the world that people can fall into. Yet there is a difference between religion and a personal relationship with God. Many false religions it is about control and also works. Salvation is a free gift from God. yet once we are saved our lives should be different and bring about good not sin.

[@barbarosasmth2104]

Wemen are heavily subsidized in our society.

[@LandonStrauss-hc1sc]

Put down the crack pipe😅

[@EnnVee959]

This is not the comments board on which express your mgtow infected mind.

[@EnnVee959]

It is indecent to express the thoughts stemming from your mgtow infected mind on this comments board.

[@Spasiuka]

uau! i am the first one here!

[@lifetaketwo7662]

Haha hello❤

[@Spasiuka]

Hello from Portugal, Jenny!!!!!

[@lifetaketwo7662]

@ hello! My bestie went Portugal this summer and it looked amazing

[@libera7161]

That's so wrong. I don't have anything against traditional roles but as I understood it, originally the wife has to get "pocket money" from his husband. That's why a man has to earn enough for a whole family if he wants a traditional wife.

[@archervine8064]

That depended on the terms of any marriage contract the family signed. It was certainly common, especially among the better off, but not universal.