i watched the lolita episode of what not to wear so you don't have to

[@TheStitchess]

Hey guys! Just a couple quick updates: A lot of people have expressed interest in what Lexa is up to now. From what I read on old EGL posts, she IS still a lolita - or at least she was in 2012 or so - BUT she also wants privacy after being on this show as she does not seem to appreciate how they edited her conversations. Because of this I will not be seeking out or sharing any of her personal info because I want to respect her desires. A lot of you have also pointed out that Stacy London has grown and changed quite a bit since this episode, and I agree! She’s done an interview with StyleLikeU that I react to here - kzbin.info/www/bejne/pKHZm6yaf6iqoM0 While I obviously don’t appreciate what the hosts were like in this show we also have to remember that production companies like TLC are often the most unethical variable and can pressure individuals to act certain ways or say certain things. With all that said, um, big thanks to everyone who watched this since rn I am singlehandedly attributing this video to my recent KZbin growth 😅 Hope everyone has a good day!

[@eclecticdom]

Seems to me like they were bullying her about her wardrobe and also saying how awful it is that she had been bullied...

[@fanaticaH]

Have you ever watched how do I look, it constantly had episodes like that and I think this episode was trying to compete with that. I think it was even worse because their own family members or loved ones were the ones who humiliated them.

[@tenedria]

yeah they were really mean to her. Just because you don't like a fashion style doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Like I don't like green mohawks but I don't go around harassing people about it. If they like having one, its up to them, not me.

[@readbycoco]

I found you from this video, and I've subscribed 😽💕

[@User-gh9kf]

Super off topic, but where is your dress/top from? 😩♥️

[@hadriel2914]

“You look like a child!” “Why do you look so kinky?” Chris Hansen: Sir, have a seat

[@OffSatan]

I think they are too hung up on the book to look at the fashion (Side note: the name "Lolita" is the only thing I don't like about the fashion, I don't want to say with certainty that the fashion is indirectly named after the book, but it's an unfortunate name reguardless)

[@brayermoth]

@@OffSatan a Google search would've told you that modern day Lolita fashion sprung up from a cultural shift in the seventies in favor of cuteness and Otome-kei fashion and the styles that came from it. Nothing to do with anything distasteful or gross

[@storytellermillermiller1931]

Lolita isn't strictly ddlg it is a fashion however many littles like the cuteness of it and so they chose to wear it!!!

[@addisonb.1356]

@@brayermothYess! It was made by a group of women who didn't want to over sexualized and pushed into that narrative of getting married young. They came up with a style that said their still aloud to be fun and youthful and be their own person then just a married baby maker!

[@Nikki-lodeon]

@@storytellermillermiller1931 thank you for bringing up littles in a positive sense. We get so much hate. Her saying DDlg is "BS" just hurts. We'll totally defend anyone's right to wear Lolita and not be sexualized or fetishized for it. Please don't turn around and hurt us just to distance yourself from that stereotype.

[@tsunaida]

Petition to change the name of this show to “Boomers Refuse to Understand Alternative Fashion”

[@lemonmeat]

Looks like it's time to sign a petition

[@idkwhateverbyelol6342]

This needs more likes

[@CantBelieveItsJustButter]

I sign

[@kittycub]

Link? LINK? WHERES TGE PETITION LINK

[@fattyb001]

Honey, they aren't Boomers, they are GenX, pos GenY. They just have one remit for the programme they film; be bitchy and trash the person you're supposed to help.

[@gl00myharvester]

I hate how she says "Japan" like its a dirty word. they bullied the hell out of this poor woman and gave her such boring clothes I feel so bad for her

[@Anna-gi7kp]

I know right?? We idolize fashion from Italy and France but because it’s from JAPAN it’s automatically awful

[@curlzOdoom]

@@Anna-gi7kp I didn't even think about that. And fashion from France and Italy is just as weird!

[@ocmillion3667]

I was thinking the same thing Japan isn't even a bad place

[@bibrosko]

Not just that but from japan = a costume.... Uhmmmm japan is a real place of real people? With real fashion movements? Fkn ew

[@xochiltmartinez1123]

in my opinion i think they should leave some aspect of their personality, taste, and wants in their "make over".

[@citanulthelunatic]

The audacity of calling lolita fashion "fetish costumes" when the point of it originally was for women to reclaim their agency from the oppresive culture of being forced into looking attractive and being submissive for men

[@dumpstercub2902]

This episode is the equivalent of demolishing a cute cottage that someone built themselves and building them a McMansion.

[@ky5743]

That’s so accurate. Not everyone wants to conform to traditional beauty standards. What’s the point of a demolishing the cottage you love and building a McMansion, when you could’ve fixed it.

[@meloncornets3034]

This describes how I feel. I have so much second hand embarrassment. My handmade took so much time and I would cry.

[@CooroApplez]

Not even a McMansion, more like a empty shopping mall ;-; none of this stuff is cute!

[@katiebayliss9887]

You took the words out of my mouth

[@chocodoco4855]

Excuse moi, that's an OPEN CONCEPT MCMANSION, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

[@jamiepollard7857]

*Girl wearing basically normie looking summer dresses* Tlc: that's some freaky shit

[@leilablue]

wHeRe ArE tHe WhiPs?!?

[@Vampkiki]

@@leilablue right? Like it is perfectly normal to take full coverage clothing she wears for MODESTY ...repeatedly saying so...even wear flat shoes that couldn't possibly misconstrued as fetish wear... and suddenly slap that onto it. Like how much of a perv are these hosts?

[@pyroshayniac1090]

They're reaching so hard.

[@pastellecat]

I hate how these types of shows treat people who wear alternative fashion. They’re always like “You dress like a CHILD how DARE YOU not wear the same stuff as everyone else”

[@TheStitchess]

“I’ve spent my entire adult life living in the same trend-obsessed box and you don’t even HAVE a box??? How DARE you!”

[@vesainthesewer]

@@TheStitchess Exactly, these shows are just depressing...

[@pastellecat]

The Stitchess I also think it’s weird how they bounce between “you look like a child” and “you look like a sex maniac” when she’s in lolita.

[@s.g.arimos497]

I feel like it’s that they expect literally everyone to dress like my 60 year old now retired middle school choir teacher.

[@NightsReign]

"Kindly stop being weird and cease your protesting! Our cookie-cutter works every time." The constant gaslighting and condescension is a nice touch...

[@theshiniestmermaidonearth4283]

*Stylists* rude, insulting, treats her like a child, dismisses what she says. *Hair and makeup team* “you’re so pretty! Let me show you how to enhance your natural beauty step by step.”

[@floralfancy7814]

I can't believe they called her, a 30 year old woman, kiddo. How demeaning is that?! Damn belittling her on liking to wear Lolita Fashion too, as if she is the only adult black woman in the world who dresses like that. How rude. Sis can wear what she wants as long as she's not offending anybody

[@d6421-e9c]

​​@@floralfancy7814Why do you have to mention her being black as if that's her only personality trait?

[@_kaleido]

@@d6421-e9c it’s not her only “personality trait” but as a black woman it’s a problem both within and outside of our race that people consider alternative fashion on us strange, deviant, and try-hard. ignoring that doesn’t help anyone. look up videos on the “black girl Oreo” stereotype

[@westvirginiascoolestcanadian]

i think it’s because makeup artists and hair stylists are taught to appreciate everyone’s beauty and work with it, they’re artists. whereas the two ass clowns on wardrobe are just there to shame people and shove them into this conformists box.

[@JoJo-fan-right-here]

Shows like this are what makes Lolita’s so scared to show off their style.

[@dudereallythough]

As a black woman, I was lowkey triggered by the hosts. Often times, black women aren't listened to and are seen as abrasive and difficult, regardless of tone or situation. Whenever the girl spoke up for herself, they tried to make it seem like she was being aggressive. Also, they didn't put her in any decent outfits, she's thirty, she looks so young and everything they put her in aged her. It makes me sad that she had to go through this. I'm happy she stood up for herself

[@celraekc]

Exactly. So awful.

[@pandabro1370]

Absolutely! They were being unfairly critical and she had every right to defend herself!

[@lightworthy]

seriously, the first outfit they showed her wasn’t bad, but aged her a lot. she’s only 30, she doesn’t need to be wearing stuff that gives off the impression she’s matronly if that’s not what she enjoys wearing. why is it socially acceptable to “age up” fashion, but not “age down” as they clearly think? she’s just wearing cute poofy dresses. there’s nothing wrong with it, and they immediately try to turn it creepy, her into creepy for engaging in it, blame HER for “being difficult” and not knowing what they want bc they have her basically no real fashion advice (what colours looks good together, how to pair pieces, etc), when she expressed being uncomfortable they shamed her, and when they first walked in they had the EXACT attitude they shame her for having about “”normal”” western clothes but fail to see how they’re not only hypocritical, but also stripping her of her identity by not even trying to keep ANY elements of lolita/cutesy styles in their new outfits. i’m white so i’m not at all the expert, but it honestly reads a LOT like that complex of extremely aging black girls to force them to be more mature/be perceived that way by society, especially in a sexual predatory sense. all around creepy and just plain mean

[@lizlovin4504]

Those hosts were way out of line. Also I don't know when this episode came out but these outfits are so grossly 2000s and grandma like. I don't know why these "fashion gurus" can't accept and work with alternative fashion. ALTERNATIVE FASHION IS STILL FASHION. Even if they didn't like it or felt it was too much they could have at least listened to her and maybe found some toned down versions of the same things. And helped her dress herself better.

[@jfm14]

@@lizlovin4504 The US version ran from '03 to '12 or '13, I think? This episode would be one of the later ones, since Ted (the hairstylist) didn't join the team until the last few seasons. So yeah, the styles are outdated... but I definitely remember that stuff being considered very chic at the time, lol.

[@foxglovearts1129]

"I want help coordinating my style" "YOU DONT DRESS LIKE A DEPRESSED SOCCER MOM WHOS HIDING HER DIVORCE SO WE DONT LIKE YOU"

[@courtneycherry113]

Lmao that's pretty much how people want me to dress.

[@DaintyFunk]

I can’t help but notice the “angry black woman” narrative that the fashion police are pushing as well

[@courtneycherry113]

Right!!!!!

[@MichelleMyBelle2.0]

Right! They tried to say she had an abrasive attitude, when she was not abrasive at all! She was incredibly respectful trying to explain what she wanted and what she needed help with, and they ignored her!

[@annaSapphire360]

She probably was angry, I'm not even there and these two managed to hit every nerve I have

[@Salamandereah]

@@annaSapphire360 I don't know how she kept her cool, she was so professional and sweet.

[@Luna-zj3ht]

when they kept asking her if she was in a good mood in the scene after she cried and then when she said yes they were like tg and i just thought how gross of them

[@tudoemaisumpouquinh1]

I would love to see a spin off of this called “how to wear it” where instead of totally changing a person’s stile, they just help them improve their stile. For this girl, for example, they would help her coordinate her Lolita outfits and accessorize!

[@tudoemaisumpouquinh1]

RuralGayBoy absolutely amazing addition!!!

[@amyhannon3034]

Absolutely! You know what I wanted out of these hosts? I wanted them to study up on lolita and crank it up to 11. Educate your audience on different fashion subcultures, yanno?

[@Nakia11798]

style* That would be an AMAZING show. I need it. I have no idea how to coordinate outfits.

[@i-harmonize2979]

And still throw away some items (for instance the ones that are far too worn, insensitive to culture, or just impossible to style). I think this show has done better on some episodes and maybe it was the earlier seasons that they were actually able to find people either without a style already or who fit the rather specific needs that these people could actually help with. This late in the show (season 7) they were probably running out off original ideas which accounts for the desperation of that opening scene and the huge deal they're making over relatively small issues. In some of the earlier seasons I watched it was people who obsessively collected clothing, who wore ill-fitting and overtly sexual clothing because of a lack of self esteem, or moms who had lost and gained a lot of weight through various pregnancies and didn't have any items they liked. Those episodes were rather inspiring to watch because while the hosts were blunt, the people actually disliked their own clothing or had a real problem. That extreme approach didn't really fit this woman's case. Regardless the way they treated her was atrocious and not acceptable in any circumstance.

[@wxnnie3728]

Omg that’s an absolutely amazing idea!! It could help people, and not bully their fashion choices!

[@sosansational]

"i wanted something fun and innocent, you're turning it into a fetish" "no, i'm not" YES YOU ARE STACY

[@oliviab3535]

sans the face she made.. omg yikes

[@lilianamejia9034]

it IS a fetish

[@ilvscinna]

Tsuki Neechan , no it’s not

[@虚パンクvoidpunk]

Tsuki Neechan you're uneducated 🚫🧠

[@ag_8449]

Stacy is the new fashion karen

[@maximellow5745]

How insulted the woman got about Lolita being "fROM JAPAN" is high-key racist. Like? How DARE you wear stuff from ASIA?

[@rose-marielundholm3597]

Lol most fast fashion is from asia.

[@Smidgeon-pigeon]

Not to mention them talking about how she has an "attitude". This woman is a sweetheart. She's expressing confusion, and Stacey and Clinton framing that as rude or aggressive is also... really racist.

[@certaindeathawaits]

It’s like she thinks that because it’s from Japan it’s kinky and exotic. And when that horrible man says “you’re just a strong woman with strong opinions” is sexist. Just the statement already. And then he says that “her style doesn’t project that at all” YES IT DOES GENIUS, BECAUSE SHE’S DRESSING FOR HERSELF, NOT THE MALE FUCKING GAZE.

[@MaryJane-tp3qd]

Right!!!

[@clipperedcosmo]

not to mention maybe some ppl enjoy japanese culture like ugh

[@shannon504]

That woman talks about Japan like it isn’t one of the fashion capitals of the world.

[@МарияДимитрова-г5ъ]

It sounded so strange. It's like she thinks nothing comes out of Japan. Maybe Japan doesn't exist? Who knows!

[@shannon504]

@Storm Arashi What is that supposed to mean? I am disgusted

[@ImvuSNSD]

@Storm Arashi What does "blacket" mean?

[@roseqore8073]

@Storm Arashi _blacket wasn't racist. you're making it racist. all she's doing is combining blouse and jacket._

[@grumpycrumbles7360]

@Storm Arashi Did you watch the episode? I didn't like it either but blacket wasn't at all meant in a racist way...

[@danicatempleton6745]

"You're thirty! Flirty! Dirty!" *Dresses her like a middle aged mother*

[@monkey93xf]

Black woman stands up for herself being constantly berated: abrasive attitude.

[@virtualarmageddon6232]

This!! It also really rubbed me the wrong way when the guy stylist said something along the lines of "you are such a strong woman, your style goes against that" 🤢🤢 the trope continues.

[@Sethroith9]

Seriously! If anyone was abrasive it was the stylists. They were catty, impatient and weren’t even making an attempt to understand her.

[@hyacinthlover9370]

VirtualArmageddon agreed ! Also idk about y’all but I think that having your own style and wearing clothes that you’re comfortable in even though they’re not mainstream tells a lot stronger story than being forced to wear mainstream clothes you hate to fit in

[@IndieJackson92]

I got the same vibe from how they were treating her. It was like, as soon as she expressed her opinion (and she was so polite about it!), they'd act like she was being difficult.

[@manyfrogs]

Yep. I hate when they do that to women especially black women.

[@lovelymalus9122]

Female host: ima shame you because this is a FETISH Also female host: what rhymes with 30? Flirty. DIRTY.

[@gracemulholland5328]

“Those cosTUMES from *jaPAN*!”

[@555starangel_]

And they were obviously pushing the "angry black woman" stereotype onto her. For example, if they would literally INSULT her and she would try to stand up for herself (very soft spoken) they would instantly try to "calm her down" and ask her if she's ok. She came to them for help yet they didn't even take her style into consideration and called all her stuff ugly when it's all very beautiful. I'm angry, I don't understand how she didn't go off!

[@strawberryguts8513]

@@555starangel_ EXACTLY. People need to check there priviledge like- also as someone who likes lolita fashion and is planning into going more into pastelgoth-there outfits were kinda yikes, they need to check themselves before they try to attack her 👁👄👁

[@PhoenixRising87]

Me, a humble 33-year-old cripple: Ma'am, let me wear my cardigans and fishnets in peace before I introduce you to the business end of my cane.

[@AshHeaven]

PhoenixRising87 👀

[@lix5013]

My favourite part is when they tell her she has grandma style, and then give her a shapeless grandma dress with a "nature theme"

[@MelAtTheHelm]

That dress was legit the most hideous thing I've ever seen!

[@koudaandmoth7168]

The clothes she got afterwards are clothes my grandma would wear

[@hotsauceenjoyer2000]

I really just wanted to burn that dress, to be honest.

[@halguy5745]

and the massive necklace with stones. thats the outfit every aunt wears to a family reunion

[@redhoodxdp8568]

@@halguy5745 especially giant pieces turquoise strung on a string strapped to grandmas neck

[@harmonypon7380]

“This plaid bunny bag is awful!” “Can you please teach me how to incorporate him into my wardro-“ “NO! It makes me SO ANGRY I want to HIT IT!” It’s hilariously ironic that they’re chastising her for “looking and acting childish” when they refuse to listen to her and scoff away any suggestions she has.

[@ly_penny1]

I wanted to save that bunny 😢

[@2dcrazy80]

I felt my heart break when they threw away her bunny bag and pug bag 😢

[@babyface3396]

I was so sad about that. That was legitimately cute and I could totally see that in a well put together outfit.

[@spookycarrotsgalore7553]

They tell her that her fashion is “kinky“ and stuff but then try to find clothes that sexualizes her more when she wants to look more modist. That just dont sit right with me :/

[@saratorrice3448]

Literally!! The woman was disgusted but proceeded to tell her she needed to be “sexy” like WHAT....clothing isnt (always) a kink and she should know that??

[@duskyhare6432]

SpookyCarrots Galore Also they called Lolita child-like. Saying something seems child-like then also calling it sexual right after that REALLY rubs me the wrong way. I love Lolita fashion, it’s my preferred style...but not because I’m trying to seem sexy. I just like feeling pretty and wearing cute dresses

[@CheshieD]

Dusky Hare yeaaah like you can’t say it’s one thing and then say it’s a fetish.... like.... you’re then implying that it’s a sexual fetish about children.... which would be illegal... soooooo... I can’t even explain how like mind boggling that is that they told her that. And then proceeded to be like “it’s so kinky” and “where are the whips at?”

[@ophilianecr]

That fetish comment really made me mad, for 2 reasons. 1. Black women and minority women like Asians, have a long history of being fetishized for being "exotic", "foreign" and are also seen as submissive /subservient. So to automatically imply she has a fetish, is proof there's subconscious racism and misogyny. 2. Because it seems condescending and derrogatory to those of us in the kink community, as if we were the gross ones, when we are the ones who actually listen to and respect others' boundaries. Not to mention the snide comments about her "attitude" are also proof theres underlying racism. Gross.

[@CheshieD]

Ophilia Necr Also the, either accidental incorrect usage of the word or purposeful implication, use of the word fetish just makes things worse for people with sexual preferences. Fetish: something that is NEEDED in order to get off during sex. Kink: something that is preferred during sex but not needed in order to get off.

[@penelopeclaire539]

She is literally so mild mannered but every time she has her own opinion, the hosts call her aggressive >:/

[@SkittyBlackfire]

+

[@ItsDigitalGameBreak]

Welcome to being black. I'm sure this happens to other ppl. I have witnessed and experienced this from ppl who KNEW to gaslight me this way. I am not the stereotypical angry black woman.. even tho i have a reason to be.. but i have had things said to me that were intentionally said to make that come out.

[@penelopeclaire539]

@@ItsDigitalGameBreak that sucks so much :( thank you for sharing. No one deserves to be put in a box like that.

[@strawbself]

that is: a microaggression! this whole episode reeked of racism

[@turquoisecrow4513]

And I think we all know why...yikes

[@samalamtha]

Them: "Oh my god she is going into this with the most negative attitude" Also Them 24 hours ago: "Your style is disgusting" "your favorite top UGLY" "It's a fetish huh?"

[@MichelleMyBelle2.0]

Right?! And she didn't even have a negative attitude. I don't get why they kept saying that. She seems like such a nice, sweet person.

[@poeticsparrow]

@@MichelleMyBelle2.0 it's called tone policing and happens especially to women and especially black women, it's a quasi form of gaslighting honestly like "I don't have to listen to your rational thoughts and opinions because I don't like that you sound angry" 😒

[@jenniferwood4916]

Does anyone else find it incredibly gross that when you do more childlike, innocent fashion or lolita that people immediately think sex. Like why do they see childlike and think about sex.... thats really a bit disturbing and gross that their mind goes there cause, I cant speak for all of us but FOR SURE thats not where mine goes.

[@user-ly2nx7ss2x]

I know right! I completely agree with you! It's so strange that's the FIRST thing that comes to their mind! Like pls shut up!

[@craftypixel7992]

And many lolita isn't even childlike. Like in renaissance medieval ball gowns they were literally victoriana lolita style but longer and they don't call that "child like"

[@JoJo-fan-right-here]

A lot of people are really scared about weirdos that are into abdl n shi so I think mostly that’s why. Also because of the book Lolita… People who haven’t watched the movie/read the book and haven’t done any research into Lolita fashion, they just associate the two. I never even thought of Lolita fashion when watching the movie Lolita, because they have nothing to do with eachother.

[@naolucillerandom5280]

​@@JoJo-fan-right-here damn, even the "coquette" girls that do take inspiration from the movie dress in a completely different way to lolitas! The aesthetics, inspiration, and styling philosophy is impossible to mix up between the two.

[@PastelOddity]

“It’s a whole Fashion.” “In JAPAN.” Runway fashion isn’t JUST fashion in Milan, lady.

[@vaderladyl]

That is not Runway fashion but alternative fashion.

[@PastelOddity]

vaderladyl I know, it’s a comparison.

[@kioku119]

They wouldn't say that if it was anywhere in Europe. Also there's a lot of lolita fans in America. They clearly just don't spent time with adults that have actual interests, hobbies, personality traits, or opinions of their own.

[@j_fenrir]

@@vaderladyl also, there are lolita fashion runways. They're really awesome to watch, if you check out the Baby, The Stars Shine Bright or Angelic Pretty ones, they're super impressive

[@bibrosko]

Also (im from italy) the two dudes would look so poorly dressed in milan 😌

[@pixiem4ni4c]

the fact that they automatically think “kinky” when they see childlike clothes is extremely disturbing. nothing about it is sexual in any way,,, also the idea that a piece of clothing shouldn’t be worn by it came from japan..? what does that have to do with literally anything 💀

[@boybreakdowns]

Honestly, something about the way people talk about Lolita style screams closet pedo to me.

[@neutralweird]

Seriously! Like what is sexy about childlike aesthetic? They gotta have credible fashion sense to have a whole show, yet they’re not really *looking* at their customer. If they don’t know their people, then they don’t actually know what fits them.

[@jerryjustice5021]

because child labor laws in some parts of Asia aren't great so some people group that together

[@jerryjustice5021]

I just watched that part... nevermind lol

[@septicvortex8114]

FRR

[@Tc123.]

She was so soft spoken and was obviously trying to be nice and say what she wanted at the same time. It’s so gross that they had to say she had an “abrasive attitude”

[@wishingwell_333]

she was trying to rightfully defend herself n they were attacking her like ? I am disgusted

[@chloelawrence3394]

@@caitybelle16 I was thinking this too 😕 they almost came at her with that energy before she even fully met them. She was so calm and collected but she knew when to put her foot down.

[@breathedarlingokay]

its because she's black. the two hosts view her existence as 'having an attitude', whether theyre aware of that fact or not, the way they talked about her was absolutely passed down to them. needs serious readjustment. and wow! black women arent all "sassy" and a black girl expressing how she feels isnt "having an attitude". they said shes difficult and trash talked her bc of their bias that they may or may not know they have. she was soft spoken and sweet and they harassed her to no end and kinda gaslit her when they kept saying she had an attitude, wasnt open, etc.

[@kaitouwu7179]

they really out here shaming her for wearing lolita by calling it a “fetish” but then telling her she should dress flirty and dirty.

[@ashtreemeadow2636]

The racism in this episode! It was so gross. Lexa was treated like an “angry black woman,” and it’s sickening. Plus the whole, “in Japan!” thing, as someone else points out, as if it’s not a fashion epicenter.

[@vamp4418]

@Sarai BayonTlamintzi but they are Asian? you do realize Asian people aren't only from Korea, Japan, or China right?

[@grooviestmaster]

Thank you! She literally said, "blacket" Like wtf! I almost bet you a million fake dollars that she wouldn't have made that "joke" if she wasn't black

[@gunty4889]

I was thinking the same damn thing

[@virginiapeterson1404]

Thanks for voicing what i was saying. Its just sickening. "Attitude "

[@Nakia11798]

Yeah, Japanese fashion goes to America pretty often, but racist stylists like to pretend that they made it up.

[@MetalHachiko]

She's actually wearing Vivienne Westwood shoes with the gothic lolita look, yet they belittle her for not knowing fashion 🤔 they don't even know designer when it slaps them in the face

[@nessyness5447]

and they must have been incredibly expensive too ..

[@jessicagomez4328]

nessy ness I want to know where she got that plaid bunny bag because in ALL the years I’ve looked at Lolita fashion and clothing websites, those types of bags will cost you as much as a designer bag.

[@nessyness5447]

@@jessicagomez4328 have you tried aliexpress? I know it's not original brands and i understand some people only want to buy legit original brands. But they have a lot of lolita things pretty cheap.

[@jessicagomez4328]

nessy ness oh yes and it’s so tempting not buy them but they are cheaper quality most of the time and even the lolita fashion on there can be expensive (nothing compared to the originals) but the episode came out originally around 2008-2009 and I still remember that at that time Lolita fashion was as much or even more then designer.

[@nessyness5447]

@@jessicagomez4328 yeah, you have to be carefull and look at the buyers pictures and comments, the rating of the store , etc, very well. I've got some skirts with digital printing that are super cute and really comfy. And the two blouses i got there were good too. The shoes and bags are pretty decent in general too, just don't buy anything that looks suspiciously cheap, like if you know in legit lolita store it would cost 90 , and it cost 40 on ali that's ok, but if it costs 10, then suspect.

[@katkms]

“Its fashion” “In Japan” HUH?? WHY IS SHE SAYING IT LIKE AN INSULT????

[@kawaiiology]

I don’t even understand that part because as someone who has lived in Japan, lolita is still considered an “out there” style. The only difference is Japanese people don’t really care about how other people dress ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ or rather, they mostly keep their opinions to themselves.

[@BwaHaHaToldYa]

because this is AMERICA and AMERICANS only wear UGLY tshirts and BORING pencil skirts *eyeroll*

[@Valeria-ss2cg]

boomers 🙄🙄🙄

[@teresewengkristiansen5076]

I think this is a part of a bigger problem in the fashion industry, where there is this very old fashioned belief that fashion only exists in the west. However, this is luckily (very slowly) changing, but it is very apparent in shows like this.

[@kittycatcuties]

There's this stereotype western people have about Asia being this weird and whacky wonderland, so they never take anything serious from there.

[@nagywywy]

Marie Kondo: Before throwing it out, thank every clothing for the joy it has brought you before! These people: UGLY, TRASH, WHAT IS THIS

[@QueenCloveroftheice]

“Let’s throw away all those lolita costumes from JAPAN!” Xenophobia is not a stylish look, honey. 0-0

[@juliaxiaoa]

THAT MADE ME SOOO MAD!! My best friend almost stopped talking to me or ANYONE because they told her that her Chinese accent was ugly!!

[@shizuevoltam]

YES!!!

[@garcia0505]

Dude..... If it's actually IMPORTED from JAPAN... These clothes expensive af. Don't throw these away, for God's sake.

[@ariesfairy4444]

Garcia MC yessss I was going to say the same thing. I’m not into Lolita fashion but I know that it’s not cheap. I once saw a Lolita dress that was almost $300!!!

[@Vampkiki]

@@ariesfairy4444 the average is around $300 for an o.p. (One piece dress with sleeves). Some jsk's (the jumperskirt style she wore with a blouse)... cost the same or slightly less. But you can get an l.p. (lucky pack with a jsk..blouse.. head bow) for less. The really nice ones... $1500.00 or more. (Some even wear these as wedding gowns.)

[@spice1710]

My answer of how to fix her look: 1. Give her Lolita shirts 2. Lolita shoes 3. Lolita accessories 4. Petticoat 5. Bigger Lolita dresses 6. Cute glasses 7. Dress shirts for work 8. Straight skirt with some fun embroidery for work. That way she still has her modest, fun style. She clearly has a problem with being sexualised, likely from her past in tge shelters , so it’s disgusting that they treat her the way they do with no respect.

[@parker5043]

this show should have given her access to more lolita/lolita style clothing/accessories. Not make her look like a depressed soccer mom in her 40s

[@dulceshinobi]

they made her look so much older... like in her mid 40's-50's also, what part of "I wanted something fun and innocent" translates to "FLIRTY DIRTY THIRTY"??

[@ToniButtcheeks]

I just don't understand why they couldn't just teach her the "rules" of fashion and how she can translate that into Lolita. Teach her about colour theory and how to build aesthetically pleasing colour palettes she can turn into outfits. Show her how she can take the exact same set of items (strapped dress w/ longsleeve shirt underneath) that they ridiculed her for and show her a pinafore dress with a frilly blouse underneath. And why the actual fuck couldn't they work with her to boil down the essence of what she likes about Lolita and show her how to apply that to businesswear. Show her that lace collars, fit & flare dresses, and maryjane shoes can easily be applied to the workplace. Or v simple clothing she pairs with crocheted tights & cute jewelry. There was such a simple way to teach her how to dress properly without COMPLETELY invalidating her identity.

[@hannahshark8080]

I'd throw in some fun wigs for events and styling lessons coz wigs are very different to real hair.

[@toastcrumch]

“You’re the one turning it into a fetish thing” “I’m certainly not it just looks that way.” GIRL DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF??????

[@lightworthy]

LITERALLY like it’s meant to oppose sexualization, and often adopts innocent and childlike commonalities, YOU seeing that as fetish like is a massive problem on YOU, not the style. dressing cute or innocent or childlike isn’t sexual or recently i’ve seen people saying it’s used by streamers/etc as a way to profit off pedophilia which is the literal opposite of the point and also NOT THE FASHIONS FAULT IF IT WAS BEING USED LIKE THAT. she walked in trying to turn it into a “30 year old WOMAN acts like a CHILD!!!” disaster creepy story when it’s just a modest woman who still likes cutesy things but doesn’t know how to fully establish her lolita/cutesy style into a full outfit. just like chains and harnesses don’t automatically mean you’re kinky, wearing cutsey lolita-esque styles don’t make you childish nor fetishy. she likes the style, they’re being assholes about the ENTIRE thing especially her as a person for engaging in it when she just needs tips on how to fully pull it off

[@crysentia11]

honestly i'm not even surprised, it seems like everything outside of the norm is seen as a fetish thing. "Oh, you like something that I think is wierd? Must be a fetish!"

[@Slithera]

@Tilly Divine The fashion originates from Japan, and the way it was given to the fashion is generally believed to be a case of wasei-eigo, a phenomenon in which terms or words from other languages are incorporated into Japanese as slang and given a different meaning from their origin. In short, it's believed that the fashion got the name because both the name and the fashion are girly and cute. The name Lolita does have some negative connotations, but it's not the one and only meaning. Just like the term Goth has several different meanings, the name Lolita doesn't originate in the novel - It's a given name and also a nickname to the name Dolores, a Spanish name that references Nuestra Señora de los Dolores, or the Virgin Mary. Would you suggest that people who are named Lolita change their name so that society wouldn't bother them about it? I'd hope not because that's ridiculous. TL;DR: Names and words have different meanings. Instead of jumping to conclusions and assuming the worst, please try to educate yourself first.

[@sugarpineapple5398]

Tilly Divine the book is written in a way that it’s told by an unreliable narrator. Use Critical thinking while reading for once. You’re supposed to realize that he’s not telling you the story in a way that actually happens. Lolita is a story in which you, from the predator’s perspective, read about how a grown man abuses and fetishizes a girl until she runs away from the abuse only for her life to end because of it. Lolita is a feminist fashion originating in Japan as a way for adult women to declare that they will not be figuratively chained to their houses as only a wife and baby maker until they die. Lolita Fashion allows these women to instead hold onto what they love and not tie them down as a wife. That is their escape, much like in the book. Society is the predator, and much like ‘Lolitas’ fate in the book, even though Japanese women get that temporary escape, they will still die in the misogynist culture. The fashion is called Lolita because it’s cute, it’s still a popular name in Spanish speaking countries. But it’s also important that these major points in the book, can represent the oppression that the Japanese women that created the fashion had to go through at the time. By fetishizing lolita fashion you are doing exactly what Humbert did, twisting something innocent and pure into something gross and ‘seducing’.

[@demonninetaledfox]

@Tilly Divine The name "lolita" was taken because it is a western girls name, it is not a direct reference to the book. The fashion is inspired by rococo and victorian fashion from Europe. It just sounds cute in Japanese so people adopted it without realizing the full implications of it for western speaking people. It's absolutely ridiculous to demand they change it when it's not about the book at all as Dolores doesn't dress like this whatsoever, just because some people gasp in shock because they can't comprehend it was a name before the book and that not everyone in Japan had a full understanding of the scope of western literature. It's not about the book. It's not at all about the book. If you hate the book and people trying to dress like that so much then go attack nymphet fashion which is literally the thing you're describing you hate. We're sick of having the same conversation for decades. It's not about the book for god's sake.

[@grooviestmaster]

The hosts are literally so abusive, this would've traumatized me

[@PSICadetZen]

"I like modesty" "Here's a dress that shows more leg" yep, that's totally what she wanted

[@GreenAndGoth]

I REALLY dislike the disdain in her voice when she says “Lolita costumes from Japan”. Like, have some damn respect for people and their styles and cultures. -_-

[@lavdoll]

EXACTLY. I personally don’t really have Lolita fashion, but I’d rather wear a loli dress then what they are wearing, and they probably think they’re right and everyone will agree. Those goddamn people need to understand how insulting and offensive they’re being to certain people, and how racist Edit: they’re whole purpose of the show is to change people.. wtf

[@dorsab8627]

It REEKED of prejudice and racism.

[@publicunknown]

But people wouldn't see that as racist bc its against asian people. Honestly this whole episode fucking sucks ass and :(

[@arielbuik5684]

neu dae this entire episode reeked of ignorance and racism

[@skyc7089]

yyeah

[@isobelramsey9767]

I can't even watch this anymore. They are literally bullying her.

[@Maxx-ni5zh]

Same I got too mad

[@valhallashock716]

I had to stop and take a break after the guy punched the plaid bunny :(

[@hannahm.3606]

yup, completely freaking bullying. Imagine being pressed that someone doesn't fit into your box lmao

[@jamiefarnik5595]

Seriously, they're so middle school shitty. It makes my stomach hurt.

[@jamiefarnik5595]

@Storm Arashi absolutely. All the talk about her "attitude" when she was actually really soft spoken and sweet when they kept bullying her? Big red racist flag.

[@moonbunny24]

"We're just getting rid of everything that's *ugly.*" Ma'am, I'm afraid you forgot to throw away that attitude.

[@moonbunny24]

"She's gone into it with the absolute most negative attitude that she could possibly go into it with." Wow, what an apt way to describe the attitude they had when going through her wardrobe.

[@quinnnyberg4294]

her: expresses her opinions and disagrees respectfully hosts: OH MY GOD HER ATTITUDE IS HORRIBLE

[@k______..]

omg yes! she is so soft spoken, how they could see her as abrasive or with a terrible attitude is insane

[@jadeyarborough5413]

Good ol' racism against black women 😒

[@Sparkl1ngM1lk]

I knoooww they were sooo toxiic 😩😩😩

[@cupcakejack7375]

And whenever she IS abrasive is because they are being rude to her

[@RubyBlueUwU]

Honestly tho the fact that she’s black adds a whole layer of discomfort to this since black women are often denied femininity, softness, fragility and basically anything even vaguely resembling Lolita fashion...it’s genuinely enraging watching these people enforce social norms on a woman so clearly looking to reject them (which should be applauded!! We should not be shaming a woman for trying to reject the things society projects and enforces upon her because of her age and race!!)

[@sarahdavis8175]

Also the fact that they kept calling her abrasive and saying she had an attitude when she was only telling them how she felt. Telling a black woman she has an attitude is so not right.

[@conn1e]

@@sarahdavis8175 She wasn't even mad, she was enforcing her consent like she should. Her body her choice what to put on it! I agree with The Stitchess. "Why's it feel weird, what do you dislike about it? The feel, the cut, the fabric?". You don't get anywhere in life telling people they're wrong you ask them to explain themselves and you explain yourself.

[@splingusbugs]

Yeah. I thought her dresses were actually pretty cute, but they really bullied her into crying. I also got really bad vibes when the lady host also said "Those costumes from JAPAN" in such a nasty tone on the word Japan.

[@grooviestmaster]

Preach! She was such a delicate guest on their show. They missed their chance to really discuss how fashion forward she was as black woman wearing Lolita inspired clothes

[@youraverageartist1588]

@@splingusbugs same

[@m6mkk77]

“She looks great in everything” except for everything that she had and liked

[@caitilinploof214]

“This bold print will be timeless and classic.” Me, a novice dress historian: .......This episode came out in 2011, prints like that were out of common fashion by 2009.

[@kailairson7302]

They are literally bullies. Also. Not to mention there was cute shit in there that she could work with and improve her different outfits

[@HistoryRogue95]

They are! I used to love this show growing up, but I watched it last year and felt so bad for the poor girl that was on that episode. These guys were so mean to her!! I watch a lot of TLC shows (I love garbage), but I can't with this one anymore.

[@whisperingwillow7697]

Exactly! You learn to build on what you have, heck I'm still doing this with my vintage outfit pieces you can always learn to build outfits in a new and better way. Someone should've just kindly said hey do you want help putting things together for an outfit with the clothing pieces you have? Like the other vintage gals I befriended.

[@olivia6773]

A part of me died as they threw out that plaid bag. Her wardrobe wasn’t trash. It didn’t seem torn or stained. They were just rude to that poor girl.

[@whisperingwillow7697]

@@olivia6773 Agreed! That purse was so cute and fashionable not to mention it meant a lot to her, I mean all her clothes did. They don't know anything they're full of hot air.

[@katdanas8279]

The stylists really told her she dressed like a child and then proceeds to dress her as a boomer. I'm done lmao i wanna give her a hug so bad

[@demonbunny6555]

She looks really boring in the end of this video. She actually looks really cute with her Lolita outfits she just needed some better shoes and accessories

[@katdanas8279]

Sw I agree!! I loved her Lolita outfits!

[@niawohl3377]

To be fair the clothes would not have looked old or stuffy at the time. They could have chosen stuff that better fit her personal style, but the reason those clothes are associated with boomers is because they are out of date.

[@HorrorBorealis]

Seriously! They aged her 20 years. Awful!

[@Hannahhcamillle]

They literally bully her to the point of crying then they're like "why are you crying??"

[@aruglaempire2518]

Bully, bully, bully --- *YAWN*!!!! Now cry.

[@suey-suitu]

As someone who's been alt my entire life, I can't imagine somebody telling me that because my choices aren't on a runway, they can't be fashionable. Like, no, you can make an alternative style fashionable, and it's super obvious that that's all she wanted. She didn't want an entire wardrobe change, she just wanted to learn how to make her alternative wardrobe fit together, and look more cohesive. Boomers, man.

[@youthgirl08]

“iN JaPaN?!?” Yes, Stacy that’s a different country with different styles than the western style.

[@meijelly]

goes to show how ignorant she is

[@Rosemary-ql4hk]

The shock is just... it’s kinda xenophobic

[@abbiegilfilen3449]

"Abrasive attitude".. no, she was literally so soft spoken and sweet, she just got fed up with their bullying

[@beaubryant4465]

i'm very uncomfortable with how they labeled a black woman as "difficult" and "abrasive"

[@PhoenixRising87]

They were this close to calling her "uppity."

[@beaubryant4465]

@UCkNWkgdTrA63XPdWj3U4-IQ ... no, she really wasn't tho. like stitchess said, she was uncomfortable, and frustrated with s&c for talking over her. they refused to explain the rules, and then got annoyed with her for not understanding. they blatantly made fun of her, calling her style a fetish, and insisting on methods that *clearly* didn't work for her. she wasn't being difficult, if anything she was defensive.

[@SaraH-jn5db]

They bullied and harassed her and were then offended she was one of the only people on the show who defended themselves. She did the thing most people were too scared to do and they were angry because she didn't let them stomp on her

[@FrogsForBreakfast]

I'm also very uncomfortable with how they labeled a frilly cute style as weird sex. Discomfort from every angle!

[@christinemeighan9705]

Agreed. They were using some extra creepy colonial racist language. I'm happy she stood up to them.

[@froggy904]

On top of the hairstylist just being an overall nice, helpful person, I'm _so glad_ that he was black... I don't think I need to explain why

[@notsafeformiranda4271]

They worked so hard to give her the label of the "angry black woman" meanwhile they were the ones who were repeatedly insulting her and putting her in sexy clothes that made her uncomfortable. That's such bs

[@thisguyrightherehello8757]

The fact that the woman is implying that lolita fashion is both naturally fetishistic and only meant to be worn by little girls disgusts me

[@melissamenchaca9121]

THIS GUY RIGHT HERE HELLO oh my gosh nail on the hammer

[@mimineko1019]

THIS GUY RIGHT HERE HELLO, I agree 🤢🤮 That woman is so utterly confused with herself and life, she can't decide which insult to use and keeps contradicting herself. She won't acknowledge that Lolita is a style that takes a lot of work and also has been cultivated over time. Also, why do they need everyone in America to stick to whatever celebrities and the media says is okay. Honestly if they were going to be so strict on sticking to the norm they aren't even good at that because they are outdated with their taste and no one I know would like the clothes the hosts wear. The reviewer of this video has a point that this fashion being deliberately a fetish in their eyes is really more a reflection of the hosts than the wearers of the style.

[@johanna7855]

Also apparently it's only okay for Japanese people to wear.

[@CrowLady0_0]

Yeah! I thought the whole point of the fashion was to dress in a way YOU like! For you, not someone else.

[@marzipanmango]

I'm completely fine with the style, I think it's very cute (even if I didn't, people can wear what they want to wear). But you can't exactly blame people for associating the word "Lolita" with pedophilia & fetishes. Have you read the book Lolita? It's about an old man lusting over a young girl and deluding himself into thinking she's purposely dressing and acting cute and childlike to arouse him. Again, I think the style is fine but I wonder if a name change might be in order...

[@fatehakamal2941]

That lady is incredibly offensive. As someone who does not participate in any type of japanese fashion this tlc show is flat out mean and probably scripted. IDK

[@Aellaslife]

I remember reading an interview with Stacy done recently and she said she regretted suppressing people's personal style on that show.

[@squash6497]

I used to watch the UK version with Trinny and Suzanna and they were nowhere near this mean.

[@2paranoid2think]

@@Aellaslife i came here to say that haha. Also this show was on a while ago when reality was very different! Fashion-related shows now are so much more accommodating to personal style and way nicer, like Queer Eye.

[@lone6718]

Fateha Kamal it was an exaggeration, and she is actually cool now. Stacy is actually pretty different in person.

[@xladymoonlightx]

Its not the American norm, it's bad!! UGH

[@CharlotteMunn-Wood]

It seemed really, really cruel to throw away her entire wardrobe in front of her when they KNEW she came through a shelter, and that she likely had experienced her belongings being lost/taken/abandoned. I felt kind of triggered watching them discard her belongings like that.

[@kiwisweet5520]

this is a very good point

[@willowgrace7856]

There needs to be a show hosted by people who dress in alternative fashion (goth, Lolita, pastel, vintage) and help people who are new or confused with their alternative style and need help learning how to coordinate their clothes and accessories together so they can rock their weird style

[@marilynflores2907]

THATS WHAT IM SAYING. I AINT LIKING THIS EARLY 2000 RUNWAY FASHION SHOW NEW YORK shit. I don't want to wear Macy and jc penny shit.

[@cryptid-king]

YES DUDE I'D PAY SO MUCH MONEY I don't think it'll ever really be a thing because alt people aren't weird and gatekeepy about peoples style

[@bella6843]

YESSSS OH MY GOD I NEED THAT

[@peiithos]

There really needs to be. I love those styles! I hate most of the modern fashion. But I want a unique style, and those 4 are my favorites. So can I not have to wear these cringy clothes that make me feel disgusting. PLEASE.MAKE.THAT.A.SHOW.

[@cavityEXE]

I love that and need that to be a thing

[@heartmelody0]

"I think she's going into this with the wrong attitude." Hmm, maybe it's because you decided that her style that she likes and is comfortable in is garbage instead of teaching her how to coordinate and match. Her attitude is absolutely justifiable, and I think it's the wonder twins' fault for absolutely shredding her confidence.

[@janeiristatis5743]

PREACH

[@thedotintheletteri]

The wonder twins, pfft-

[@thatncrsoldieryoushot7047]

I can’t get over the part when Lexa said she wanted to be modest by wearing a shirt under her dress and the fashion lady told her “Oh, really? After that Lolita number, you want modesty?”. Just the way she said it almost sounded like she was belittling Lexa and it kinda rubbed the wrong way.

[@CheshieD]

When literally Lolita fashion is about modesty and the wanting of not being sexualized for being a woman.

[@Nikki-lodeon]

It almost sounded like "you don't Deserve modesty after how you dressed." It's gross.

[@thatncrsoldieryoushot7047]

Nikki M that’s exactly what I was thinking.

[@jessl.6386]

This whole damn episode rubbed me the wrong way. I wish they brought in a Lolita fashion expert to help Lexa instead of forcing her to conform. Apparently it's too much to ask to be respectful of other people's cultures and tastes.

[@buffyglimmers]

“You’re the one who’s turning it into a fetish thing .” Really struck a nerve with Stacy and I love that she said it

[@dezsii91]

The amount of bullying that they're doing is terrible. Why was this even allowed to be televised

[@etherealelf]

Purely about $

[@hedera280]

because its TLC.

[@AMYxxLYNNxxROCKS]

They literally just stripped her out of her personality to force her to please society with the way she looks. F***ing awful. It was as simple as helping her match the stuff she already had :(

[@gracemulholland5328]

I hate how they keep saying she has a “tough attitude” when she has been nothing but sweet or at most frustrated because they were being unbearably rude.

[@SkittyBlackfire]

+

[@kathryncooper844]

She left home as a teen and lived in a shelter...maybe that’s why she wants to wear this style. It is innocent, sweet and represents a life she probably did not get to lead. Instead of traumatizing her further they should have helped her create a work look that made her feel comfortable and confident. She can wear whatever style she wants in her personal life.

[@juliacastillo1935]

Not to mention the trauma of having your possessions taken away from you as violently as they portray in the show given that history

[@meeveekins]

Also the way she discussed her hair and why she didn't go to hairstylists and just shaved it. She had no idea how to maintain her hair and so much of it seems to link to what she went through. The makeup artist and the hairstylist were so much more gentle with her. I'm so mad at the way they painted her "attitude" constantly

[@LilChuunosuke]

Agreed! I definitely think my inability to get to be a child in my home environment growing up is a strong contributor to why I'm drawn towards cute fashion styles like Lolita.

[@bubblegum-uo5pf]

yeah. i think my mental health and the way i grew up drew me to more dark and gothic fashion styles (though i'm 100% up for trying lolita and j-fashion if i get the chance lol) and i can imagine that other people are similar. or, she might just like the style, which is totally valid too

[@SasoAkasuna]

They are always like "omg you dress like an old lady!!!" And then proceed to show the exact same granny-ish style to every single person that has gone on the show for YEARS

[@devil_in_the_details_6667]

I love that these two people who dress like a catalogue for "Entitled PTA Mom" and "White Dad Who Still Talks About His High School Football Glory Days" call her style "a fashion disaster". Seriously, the audacity.

[@heatherheath3834]

like bitch he wore a sweater vest. A SWEATER VEST. THE ULTIMATE GRANDAD ITEM

[@scubacwgrl]

This is the most accurate description of their style I've ever heard!

[@baffledmouse]

They dress so boring.

[@cloerosesmith]

Agreed. Argyle makes me want to puke and punch the offender simultaneously

[@PhoenixRising87]

@@heatherheath3834 Like, yeah, maybe don't say other people's clothes are ugly when you're still wearing your creepy uncle's hand-me-downs, my guy.

[@FelicianaVargas10]

She is trying so hard to communicate with the hosts who clearly don't care about her opinions. Its deeply upsetting. They're going out if their way to try and make her seem like this uncooperative, rude, angry person when in truth they're only revealing themselves as such. And her dresses before were adorable

[@moodycowcrafts4862]

She literally just needed help with how to chose coordinating tops (Lexa even brought up puffy sleeves!) to go under the dresses she had and how to pick accessories that complimented the outfits. If they had only focused on her business wear (a little tailoring would probably gone a long way with the items she had) that would have been less awful

[@birdyposting]

wasn’t lolita fashion like going against the sexualization of women in japan

[@salmonsays1466]

@@cringeassgremlin4302 A guy named Nabokov wrote Lolita, so I suppose it's Russian.

[@imaginaryfriend8034]

@@cringeassgremlin4302 Have you ever looked up the definition of lolita? 😬

[@ThatCrazyBookWyrm]

@@imaginaryfriend8034 The definition you're probably thinking of came from the book. Lolita fashion has nothing to do with the book lolita, when Japanese people created the fashion they chose the name because they thought it sounded pretty, not understanding the unfortunate implications of the name. It's understandable for people who aren't familiar with the fashion to associate the term Lolita with Nabakov's novel, but when people who have just learned about that fashion try to tell people who are actually in the fashion what "lolita" means and insist that the fashion *must* be part of a fetish because of it . . . yeah that's just ignorance.

[@Baby-iu9rm]

Hoso Maki did u read the book omg it was SUPPOSE to be creepy. The reader wasn’t suppose to sexualize lotia.

[@okannnnnnn]

@@Baby-iu9rm YES the book puts us into the shoes of the abuser who sexualises dolores and talks about her as if she was flirthy or seducing him just to show off how the villain mindset plays. its a great example of that resourse on a story. but it does has lead to people justifying his actions, which was not navokov's intentions. a more recent example would be how the series "you" on netflix lead to people interpeting it as if it romanticices stalking when actually it condemes it on a story seen by the point of view of the villain (which is heavilly infuenced by lolita actually)

[@aheavystone3557]

The hosts are so rude, they are crossing so many boundries, and aren't even making funny jokes, they are just insulting her. And why is a MAN telling her what she can't or can wear?!

[@MimiUsagichan]

"let us throw away all those LOLITA COSTUMES from JAPAN" why does she have to sound so disgusted by everything

[@ly_penny1]

I was so sad cause the dresses were so pretty! She just needed to get matching blouses and maybe some accessories

[@aintgonnaletuknow5758]

Lolita dresses are sooo expensive I'd never throw them away lol

[@moemoechainsawmaid5368]

The lady so clearly and elequently expresses what she wants and needs. And is ignored.

[@lou1928]

she asked how she could incorporate the bunny bag to her outfits in modern way or in a coordinated way and they just flat out "you don't" and chuck it away?? no ma'am

[@artsyebonyrose]

Their complete and utter lack of consent and empathy oh my god, I would like to punt them into space pls

[@mozzarella2821]

4:01 "Let us throw away all those lolita CoSTuMeS from *JaPaN* !!" WHY DID SHE SAY IT LIKE THAT 😭😭

[@leolunchbox4543]

1. These people are so rude and she's not even that extreme?? Like she owns like 3 fairly neutral dresses and a shirt with some lace and they act like it's a crime. Let the lady wear what she wants. 2. They say "little girl" while holding a pair of Victorian Women's shoes wtf. Historical doesn't equal childish. 3. I'm a 15-year-old boy and that rabbit bag slaps I need to find one for myself. 4. The hair guy is everything I aspire to be. Kind, gentle, understanding. I love him so much.

[@froggy904]

They were calling the shoes 'grandma'

[@kamilareeder1493]

The rabbit bag is by either a brand called metamorphose or putumayo btw. Its actually a rare item now :P they were released in the late 90s early 2000s. If you post in the lolita Facebook sales that you're looking for one , you might actually be able to find it 👀 be prepared to cough up 120$ possibly. Those bunny bags can be hard to find now

[@planetduck9793]

I agree- and if you ever find that rabbit backpack tell me where I need myself one of those too

[@bubblegumbxtchh]

I love this comment so much

[@mitsubairl]

i'd pay hundreds for a plaid rabbit bag

[@marionhills8031]

I hate the whole “attitude” thing. She is just expressing her true feelings and they just completely disregard her wants entirely. They are treating her like a sideshow attraction for just wanting to dress cute. They’re the ones who are sexualizing the innocent aspect of lolita fashion and its so disgusting, it really tells you all you need to know about how in the west, you MUST dress for other people so you MUST dress in lolita for men who sexualize youth and innocence. Dressing in what makes YOU feel beautiful is just nonsense to them, apparently. This show is literally all about whittling down people’s individuality to nothing, then shaming them for feeling even worse when they inevitably hate how they look. Shitshow.

[@toastymarshmallow5372]

the history of lolita fashion is even literally about women wanting to not be sexualized, the name is just an unfortunate coincidence, and has nothing to do with the "lolicon" culture that was named after the book

[@Jae-xl4di]

Exactly!!! This disgusts.....me this show needs to be taken off air 🤦‍♀️

[@Robiness]

Right i thought these shows exist to explain to people like what colours and fabrics go well together how to achieve different shapes or that they're supposed to help the customers find or polish their unique styles to express themselves you know. But somehow they just always end up being like very mocking and they are like... trying to put people in line or something idk it's weird.

[@Batmary21]

“Just because you have a conventionally attractive body doesn’t mean you are comfortable with it” Say it again for the folks in the back!

[@purrfectpal]

Them: Roasting her outfits and saying that they look like a weird kink. Her: Not liking a skirt and saying it looks weird. Them: Omg I cannot stand that she said the clothes we chose look weird. She's so rude!!

[@cheyfrost]

This show is literally an excuse to bully and diminish every alternative fashion wearer, and calling style that the hosts hate "bad fashion".

[@heliosfromacrossastar878]

I think this show is literally an excuse to bully. Point >.>

[@demiiwatson2081]

Agreed. It's the "entertainment" version of normies bullying people with alternative lifestyles/fashion into becoming normies.

[@purplexzombie3371]

1. I hated that they treated her like the stereotypical "angry black woman" because she was uncomfortable and not happy with what they are doing. 2. There are a bunch of episodes like this where they take someone alternative and just go "NO YOU NEED TO SHOP AT MACYS". So the options are completely NOT their style and then they are all shocked and upset the person doesn't like the choices? I wish I knew how much of it was all for the show and how much was really them being pretentious shits.

[@tessiegesch8677]

But also the whole lack of regard for her style and they take the personality out of it. I think she just wanted help with putting together a wardrobe but they didn’t need to basically bully her into TEARS because they didn’t like her stuff. I also think that she has made it VERY clear she doesn’t want anything sexy and there’s probably a reason for that. The way they edit her plays into the angry black won an stereotype when she is very obviously being ignored. I Just hate it

[@wonderbread239]

From what I’ve heard, Stacy is actually kind of terrible in real life. Which by judging how she treats people on camera, I’m not surprised.

[@conn1e]

As someone who's I guess like "sterilised" to black stereotypes because I'm outside the US I always get so confused when they pull out the angry black woman. She was a hell've a lot calmer than I would be.

[@lunareclipse0629]

The point of these TLC shows is never actually helping people - it's to get footage. That's why there're never follow-ups.

[@taylor6099]

Regardless of whether or not she got her clothes back they literally emphasized how she used to be homeless and worked herself up from nothing...and then proceeded to throw away a bunch of her belongings infront of her while making fun of every single piece. This show was hot garbage.

[@breezainebigeagle8695]

This is the thing that pisses me off the absolute most. How traumatizing that must have been after working hard acquiring her own belongings.

[@sleepiesalem]

@@breezainebigeagle8695 Honestly once they would have starter to throw away and insult my stuff I would kindly tell them to leave and to take their opinions and rude attitudes to someone else.

[@CheshieD]

And even said “these ugly charity shirts” now whether they were charity as in charities SHE HAS WORKED FOR (extremely sentimental) or charity as in things she received when she had nothing (sentimental) is extremely insulting! Not only does it insult charities that she may have worked for, but it insults charities that actually give out clothing to those in need. And overall is a huge insult to her!! She literally works for the Red Cross!!!

[@nixiim]

gee, i wonder why she has a "negative attitude"

[@ly_penny1]

Yeah! It’s almost like she’s constantly being ridiculed by people who know nothing of what she’s trying to do....

[@TaniDraws]

"Except that you're thirty" ohnoooo, as soon as you're thirty you're not allowed to like anything fun or uplifting eveeeeer, only brown and boring clothes for you for the rest of your adult life. I know Stacy has gotten a lot better, but damn this makes me so mad. Being adult/mature doesn't mean you should give up everything that makes you happy. Also they threw away her white victorian style boots. I will end them.

[@parker5043]

i hate that karen looking soccer mom looking girl. >:(

[@heatherheath3834]

also I'm sorry, i would not trust them to style me within an inch of my life. that sweater he's wearing is ugly asf

[@dragoniraflameblade]

And they kept calling her "kiddo"

[@kelpfaced]

RIGHT

[@shitnotagain9492]

Sorry but that Karen looking woman’s taste of style is just shit.

[@demonbunny6555]

This fashion woman is basically acting like a critical mom during back to school shopping.

[@hologeist7284]

did you mean: my mom

[@AmberKatonic]

My mom in a nutshell. This show was also one of her favorite shows. I always hated how mean they were.

[@assarthedollymama3242]

IF your mom was a total racist.

[@sachicocoa9013]

I hate shopping for clothes to this day because of my mom. I'm afraid of looking at something that I may remotely like, then showing it to my mom, and then listening to her shoot it down because it's not cute to her/she doesn't like it and her criticizing my "non-existent" sense of style. She once yelled at me saying I have no style because I just wanted to wear a Pikachu shirt. I just started to give up and just told her to pick something for me. I HATE finding what I want to wear each day because I used to have to deal with her telling me to change because SHE doesn't like it. It's like I was only an extension of her like I was a fucking ornament that HAD to dress to HER liking and HER standards at ALL times. By extension I hate shows like this one because It reminds me that I don't have enough knowledge in clothing to know that I'll look good in what I see and what wont. I'm not fashionable enough to be confident in my own wardrobe...

[@Valentina_hi]

Sachicocoa sameeeeee, i am the most basic bitch ever and still she complains. Yesterday was my birthday and she literally told me “could you at least give your mother the pleasure” no I can not

[@ToruKun1]

"You're obviously a *strong* woman with *strong* opinions, but your wardrobe doesn't reflect that" LET👏BLACK👏WOMEN👏WITH👏TRAUMA👏BE👏CUTE👏AND👏FRILLY👏ELEGANT👏GOTHIC👏LOLITAS

[@yeosangsgirl9686]

ToruKun1 I love you

[@whimsyoni]

YESSSS

[@pokemonsisters]

Exactly they kept trying to push a narrative that she wasn’t allowed to be vulnerable or cute like what?

[@andreasagas22]

What? Somehow this became a race issue. Oh god.

[@skyc7089]

she's being strong by being herself- her unique and headstrong self!

[@Jetty_wolfe]

“Do you see what I’m seeing in the mirror?” “I can’t see anything” honestly iconic moment I hate that the clothing people were so mean to her >:(

[@t3mptr3s]

She looked so uncomfortable. I seriously hate this show.

[@puffinmaster2466]

“Abrasive” um I’d argue she was actually TOO NICE considering how shamelessly rude and just plain mean they were to her on tv in front of cameramen and producers and other various stagehands. She cried three times just in what we saw in this analysis video and yet SHES the rude and uncooperative one? Ok... it’s gotta be the sexism/racism for me yall

[@batmanlikespizza2541]

It’s the passive aggressive racism for me. It makes it even harder to advocate for self because you’re already trying not to come across rude/mean and people like this make it so much worse. It gets to the point where you potentially become a doormat because you don’t want to hurt others feelings.

[@tubester4567]

I disagree, she came in with a combative attitude from the start. At he start she said "If they dont like my style they can go fly a kite". Why go on the show if you have that attitude. Even if you dont agree, most people would just go through the process then go back to how they normally dress. Nobody is holding a gun to her head.

[@carrot7911]

Yeah I would have of screamed at them

[@autumnpoobear]

@@tubester4567 What you are not understanding is that this is a dramatized reality TV show. Part of this is scripted. She most likely was prompted with a question before that asking “Are you going to change your style after this?” etc. etc. She was nowhere near aggressive, she was being satirical.

[@tubester4567]

@@autumnpoobear If that was the only issue maybe, but she seemed to be butting heads with people all through the show.

[@cindy3933]

"I have had a very traumatic life and I do not want to keep reliving it." "why aren't you happy???"

[@user-tn3yf6pv5h]

"it worked out really well, except that you're 30" that grandma who likes hello kitty & cute stuff: ತ_ತ

[@TwentyOneCatz]

I feel like a guy wearing a striped shirt with an argyle vest should not be handing out fashion tips.

[@baileyk2931]

And a leather jacket on top

[@bunnyraptor420]

Even just reading that combination of clothes makes me wince, I don't need to see the outfit.

[@youraverageartist1588]

Not to mention the baggy jeans with the worn-out leather shoes

[@krisfartface]

don’t even get me started on the popped collar...

[@bagofcupcakes]

they're giving old navy clearance rack. whoever gave them their own show isnt seeing heaven

[@flowerpower7320]

They didn’t even style her in good outfits within their own rules.

[@comedyblastYT]

If a new client walked in wearing one of the outfits they gave her, they would have torn it to shreds

[@allared9008]

I feel like this show is targeted to middle aged women who only shop at Macy’s.

[@NAZRULISLAM-kz6yc]

Definitely

[@a.b.cooper4807]

Your feeling is correct.

[@sleepiesalem]

As a teen who has to shop at Macy's half the time I agree with you.

[@antares5561]

LMFAO

[@princessnatty]

That's what it was on the British version

[@RavinkaMalinka]

"We're gonna throw away everything that's ugly" ....she can throw out her whole personality then.

[@Sage-qj5xw]

also why do they always dress everyone like a kohl's mom

[@AlishaAziz]

I dont even wear lolita and it hurt me deeply when she said to throw away all those lolita costumes from Japan

[@olivinecollective2708]

But they aren't costumes. Please she says it through the entire video that it's a style not costumes. They're outfits.

[@denvertikky4088]

"thOse cOstumeS FrOm japAn" Is shit from japan a bad thing???

[@splingusbugs]

lowkey gives racist vibes honestly, I didn't know if anyone else picked up on it

[@AlishaAziz]

@anime lover I was quoting ish

[@this_Kwazicat]

+ lolita is expencive and i just CRIED.

[@PlasticRarity]

I hate this. I hate how sad they left her. This is a person who wants to just be herself and they're trying to make her into this sexy person, and it's like... why are you trying to pervert this person who wants to just be simple and modest?

[@ninaterzyan1813]

and when they said her original style was too fetishized already. Its along the lines of what the Stitchess (I don't know her name, I've just found her channel) said about them basically saying "you're sexy but the wrong kind of sexy"

[@sometimessnarky1642]

Oh WOW... I'm only two minutes in and I don't think I'll be watching the rest. I don't think those two cretins have any right to criticize anyones fashion. Especially seeing as how the lady now wears the things she criticized before and talks about how she sold out for money and TLC.

[@parker5043]

What they do is disgusting. Not every girl wants to look like a depressed soccer mom in their 40s. Not every girl wants to look “sexy”. Leave people alone. With that point made, this show’s concept is just stupid altogether.

[@user-bv3yy8sq3f]

i wish that instead of trying to change her entire style to make her fit into the norm, they actually went to a store the specialized in lolita fashion and let her use the $5k there, while at the same time teaching her how to match in a way that makes sense, regardless of style.

[@the.bat.under.your_roof3814]

I agree

[@semogecarg]

she said "teach me how to incorporate that" and they yelled at her and made fun of her and made her throw it away

[@allisonnicole1659]

“We WaNt YoU tO aSk Us LoTs Of QuEsTiOns ToDaY” after laughing at her for CONTINUOUSLY reaching out with a question

[@conn1e]

Yeah 'cause they suck at fashion and don't know how maybe... The mere fact the fashion stylists didn't do an internet search for half an hour on what lolita is to educate themselves and hence try to incorporate it speaks volumes on their abilities in my opinion.

[@twinkiefaith1311]

This is a person who was homeless and they threw away her belongings in front of her. Do they have no concept of what post traumatic stress disorder is like? Do they not understand that this would be stressful for someone who was homeless?!!

[@DoubleMcZombie]

Exactly, I got second-hand anxiety watching that whole scene.

[@frenchfry55]

Everything she has ever worked to get, she came from nothing and finally got something to call hers and nope, they throw it all in the trash in front of her as she watch her favorite bags she treasures so much just get trashed and called hideous

[@SadRadMad]

Seriously! As someone who has experienced poverty it really made me want to cry

[@ArceeMedicbot]

oh my god, THANK YOU for saying this! I was browsing the comments looking to see if someone brought this up. As someone who spent years in an abusive foster home, only to be kicked out and allowed to keep only a single small cardboard box of items, this brought back horrible memories. When you experience horrible shit like that, having your stuff just thrown out or mocked is physically painful. I had to pause the vid several times because I was crying so hard. This poor, poor girl! I hope to god she got to keep some stuff- and anyone who says that pug purse is ugly can meet me out back of Denny's cause I'll fuckin go!

[@kyndramb7050]

I work in mental health, and work with a lot of homeless and pre iously homeless people. This show was extremely toxic. She was loterally asking for help the whole time, and instead of helping they just escalated her anxieties by not listening. Her also not going to a salon, because of the pain... she obviously is a very vulnerable, sensitive person who has been through so much hardship that they try to exploit. Im glad she stood up for herself.

[@halley8105]

I hate the hosts of this show. They don't listen and constantly put her down. They don't notice how uncomfortable she is with the clothes, they don't ask the right questions and they don't make an effort to understand their clients. I much prefer the efforts of the makeup squad. They do everything right. Also the clothes they put her in where horrible. Honestly you can get better for five dollars at Kmart.

[@DanielaMaria1998]

You should check out Stacy London, she used to host the show but now has changed a lot, and has very different opinions on fashion and personal style

[@glitteryblerd4612]

Clinton was nice and the lady was always mean

[@rhiannonmoya4846]

They are always like this with every guest. They don't work with them or their comfort or even try to slightly ease them out of their comfort zones. They yank them out entirely into their personal sense of what is good fashion. I remember a lot of big girls being on the show who liked to cover up because of insecurity, and then these hosts would come by and put them in extremely form fitting outfits, something they never wear. Like, were SOME of the outfits a little bit more flattering? Yes! But that doesn't matter! Fashion isn't 100% how you look to others. It's about how you feel and your comfort.

[@kasaneteto4904]

Harley Jackson they do the same with any alternative fashion

[@missmelodies52]

Stacey London has done such different work since then, styling alternative ppl in alternative ways, supporting women aging without judgement, and just generally being so good!