If A Man Does THESE 5 Things, DO NOT DATE Him

[@Tomisinatobtele]

For personal relationship advice GO HERE!! www.playersclubshow.com/store-1/p/private-relationship-question

[@Vb34567]

One of the few men who deserve a microphone 😭

[@achillxs7458]

That is sexist 👎🏻

[@haidyn1230]

@@achillxs7458ur too uneducated to even use that word correctly. It literally is just teaching women to avoid toxic men..

[@9darshana]

The only one that deserves one and at a discounted price. 🤣🤣🤣

[@tiffanyiheart2848]

The endless chit chat point is dead on, a guy at my job walked past me everyday only to approach me through FB 🤦‍♀️ after 2 wks (max) of texting no plans for a date I cut him off immediately. Stand on business all 2025 ladies 🙅‍♀️❌ no wasting time!

[@kellymoore4964]

Omg thank you for saying this! The same thing happened to me only he requested to follow me on IG and wasted my time far longer than you so I commend you for that!! Also, my time waster said initially he wanted a relationship but was in no rush…only to find out about 3 months later he says ‘oh I’m done with relationships for awhile’ 🧐 I learned the hard way he’s just not that interested smh

[@Dee_Dee794]

Why do men try to talk to us just to plan nothing 😂?

[@achillxs7458]

Same!! A guy in my gym acts like he likes me, the guy literally leaves his workout spot, going on a little tour around the gym just to say hi to me, I took the first step and followed him on instagram and it literally ends there, his max is saying hi at the gym 💀

[@kellymoore4964]

@@Dee_Dee794 I think it’s to see if we’ll play and then it’s to keep us on the hook as an option 😒

[@tiffanyiheart2848]

@@Dee_Dee794 because they looking for a F buddy plain and simple. 🤣 they don’t wanna work to get you they just want you to give it up easy. And it’s usually low quality men that does that remember that 💯

[@peke1822]

1. Chitchat 2. Promises and not actions

[@TheJhubb7]

Tomisin. I love you so much, thank you for being the older brother on KZbin helping us all out

[@healyourvenus555]

Endless chit chat, pen pals, actionless heroes! Omg, I needed to hear this 💀🫶 Thank you🌟

[@spyroluver0951]

Flew to his city and didn't like his empty promises when I arrived, he wasn't the person he said he was. He did fly to me first and was lovely. I said I am breaking up and he promised to work on all these things and take me out. When I arrived last Saturday, nothing changed and now I have just changed my flight that was two weeks away, to tomorrow. First ever LDR and I learnt about my power and standards. It took longer for me to follow through on my guy instincts but I am glad to have made the change now than later. Trust the gut, trust your friends and family and don't let him waste your time on empty small promises- he would promise to show me around his city, take me out on dates and everything. Hasn't happened and it's Wednesday.

[@9darshana]

I'm glad that you stood on business and didn't waste your time. Well done!

[@rabbitgotdagun]

Once I finally realized that online dating falls in the category of mental illness , my life changed. Posting pictures of myself like I'm an advertisement and trying to seriously get to know strangers via words is low key crazy. I know the point is to eventually meet in person, but because there's no actual real initial encounter, I don't get a tangible sense of who the person really is. There's way too many people that play roles online, so its usually just a waste energy and time. But even if I initially met someone in person, if we're just texting all day, its not real to me because I can't get to know someone through just words. I need to see how someone physically moves, behaves, and sounds for me to build a serious relationship. You gave a lot of great advice, I wish I had the ability to have seen this when I was in my 20s and naive, but I guess I had to learn the hard way.

[@keriderosso6463]

Wow. That's true. Thank you

[@laurynorder3965]

It's not low key crazy, you've just succumbed to a societal viewpoint of what USED to work. Give yourself grace and stand on business now that you're aware 😘 stay up.

[@MsBonsai2010]

Alot of us did hun, you’re not alone

[@sss-md3hd]

Online dating does not work for some like you, but it’s not rocket science. Humans desire connection above all else. We can literally fall in love with toasters and robots if we feel a certain amount of connection to them. Which is why online dating exists. Some people find it easy to connect online, in fact they find it easier. As someone who is not sociable verbally, texting made it SO much easier to get to know someone else. I use texting even with people I regularly see in real life. It’s the same as writing down your feelings in a diary. There are some things you just dont discover about yourself, or anyone, until you write them down. Which is why I think you can get to know someone way more by written words. Some couples even use texting as a way to create space and communicate their feelings when they’re mad at each other. So it’s definitely effective and works for some.

[@antihipsterboho]

The chit chat red flag applies to men you actually see in person as well. If a man is a stage five clinger, especially in the begining, i lose all attraction and interest. I dont have time to be someones only source of entertainment. Its exhausting and boring.

[@Khushi-xv6ey]

what is a stage 5 clinger??

[@toasty0149]

someone extremely clingy im guessing​@@Khushi-xv6ey

[@evaa4242]

Pls what do you mean by a stage 5 clinger?

[@369kjo]

Stage 5 clinger. Clingy to the highest degree. Super clingy. The rest of the paragraph are context clues.

[@shadeofpink1]

Happened to me.Endless chit chat, no date.Promises no action.Stood me up twice. Never again. Messed me around.Thankfully he disappeared.Glad I never slept with him.Thats what he wanted.Easy women.

[@RachelKing-o8q]

The influenced attention, fake hero and empty promises also applies when you’re in a long term relationship ladies! Actually means even more in a long term relationship!!

[@gigi9301]

Promisaholics galore in the dating world these days

[@lexxipearl]

The 90 second jackrabbit 😂

[@Shellie-bf3wx]

I dated a guy for along time. I noticed a pattern in him. He was the sweetest most thoughtful man. Sunday through Thursday. But on the weekends it was all about his boys. I think LIT is the word they got fuccd up. He didn’t like me on the weekends but he wanted me close. You know I fell back and ghosted him.

[@gabrielamartiniuc6322]

That guy was using you when he had no fun plans with his buddies. What an P** Drop him.

[@tb8363]

He can marry and have babies with his boys then. Well done for dropping him. I'm sure his boys will give him a wonderful legacy and continue his bloodline!

[@MsBonsai2010]

Good for you! Keep striving!

[@DontDooTooMuch]

We're having an IDGAF contest, not talking right now.

[@twixbars6048]

He just don’t like you

[@SusanLeger]

People seem so insulted if you don't answer texts immediately. Smartphones have denigrated actual social skills.

[@ia1348]

IKR!! people look at me like im crazy when i say not everyone is made to chat 24/7

[@anjiea9813]

Every single point you made had my mouth DROPPING OPEN- you perfectly described the man who I gave everything my all to, even going as far to travel internationally to see him only to be stood up after months of hot and cold behaviour (yes, yes, BAD DECISION ON MY PART BUT WE LEARN). After leaving his country I got apologies and explanations from him but I decided to end things once and for all. I truly wish this video existed one year back, would have saved me so much trauma 😭

[@letstacoboutit._.]

YESSSS also don't waste your time on guys who continuously ask you on dates over text, who set up dates and always cancel!!!! Or never make plans just let them talk to themselves. They don't actually want to date you. Another type of guy to not waste your time is men who are MENTALLY ILL please save your life and time and energy on trying to make it work its so emotionally draining being with them and it's embarrassing too!!

[@ColieColieCole]

Perfect description of what I just experienced. Never again. Thanks, I appreciate your efforts.

[@izzcheng]

i know a guy that kept saying he was going to get millions of dollars through a lawsuit and that his mom was going to get money from the government "in 2 weeks" (every week it was in 2 weeks 🙄) and he would literally convince people to give him money by saying those things

[@ceessimplesecrets]

This is funny to me because I literally stopped talking to two guys for the reasons described in the first two types. One I was in a relationship with and I told him that he doesn’t follow thru on his promises and it upset him. I didn’t like the reaction.

[@caroltouchton4924]

Tomisin, you are a treasure! Thank you for being my wise, older brother. Luv you ❤

[@nonyabidness1838]

Yeah they are endlessly chit chatting with everybody and probably talking about you at times! 🤷🏾‍♀️ 😊

[@mulukensand5370]

taking notes, thank you for the advice. you are a blessing to us. God bless you!

[@caraRd203]

Wow he's spot on when it comes to my EX!! Thank you so much for this info, being a single child with no father in their life this is info I never had growing up & as basic as it may seem it sometimes needs to be pointed out 😬 Love you!

[@achillxs7458]

Fathers will not necessarily tell you about this stuff. It depends on the society, the family, etc, the person who will tell you abo it this stuff is indeed someone like tomisin on the internet. anyway good luck friend

[@nyeguono]

Fathers don’t necessarily say this to us. Most fathers don’t discuss dating with their daughters

[@Nitabita_]

@@nyeguonoMy dad definitely didn’t tell me about dating.

[@chanellmiranda6900]

Dated someone who was 4&5. He’s right. Listen to him!!!!

[@minniej9567]

Ahh just another day of me watching my internet dad making me realize all of my dating mistakes 🙂❤️

[@haidyn1230]

10k views!! This is what the girls needed to hear starting the year. WHAT TO AVOIDDD NOT WHAT TO ACCEPT!

[@classy_c88]

The Actionless Hero literally happened to this summer and it’s crazy Tomisin identifies how an Actionless Hero does his thing especially the traveling to me and getting an Airbnb and he “moving” to me and looking for jobs…. Crazy what he knows this like and I’m glad I’m not crazy about the broken promises…. Especially when I call it out. Whatever that was… it’s over 😆

[@ScorpioKay1027]

14:33 I've gone through this. At the time, I felt so special when this happened. I would ignore him or slow text so that he would push a little more and keep contacting me. I thought I was so special that when he was drunk or really high, his "TRUE FEELINGS " weren't able to be held back. 😂😂 At 38, I'm now realizing he was really just desperate to get off, and I was the most convenient. The girls with self love ignored them.... if they hadn't already blocked him, like I was too broken to do. Big bro, I totally understand what you mean. This is a topic that I could have really used 20+ years ago when I started dating and perfected being a victim before puberty completed. 😮 Thank you so much for these videos! ❤❤

[@skellescloset]

Helpful advice , may it help others as much as it just helped me 🙏✨☀️

[@dcyoot]

TOMISIN HAPPY NEW YEAR 🎉🎉🎉

[@zizi1034]

Happy New Year to my fav youtuber!❤🎉 You helped a lot last year and i’m so glad you put all this effort into the videos for us! You’re the best! Greetings from Hungary🇭🇺

[@k.h.413]

Thank u big brother!! Gosh, some of this was hard to hear but I definitely needed to hear it. Thanks for spitting the facts!❤

[@poetrygirl5309]

I made that mistake...... Dealing with a freaking chitchatter! I blocked him after a month. I was the one that brought up the possibility of us meeting up before we talked further but he kept putting me off. Boy bye! Better yet he's are older gentleman... Early 60s! I was in my late 40s then. Thank God I'm more seasoned now.

[@sharonrush4344]

Love your content. So helpful

[@Sheilaalien]

It's funny as none of this applies to my drug addicted, obsessed, red flag waving, jobless, homeless dusty

[@ABC-jq7ve]

Why u dating him?

[@christinacreates2393]

Sounds like the problem is YOU. Why is he around?

[@meganjane3]

Ughh the first one, just experienced that, so legit perfect timing. We did meet up a couple times, but it was mostly chit-chat, until I was finally like, Dude? When he finally explained, I was left feeling like I didn’t do enough, but I did my part. I think he was just insecure, based off the last meetup(explained why he had beanie instead of nicer hair) and idk I wonder if he lost a job in the midst as well because things were weird after a work incident. If I didn’t confront him though, how long would we have just chit-chatted?😱

[@kaedatiger]

It's always the guy asking me to get serious with him 😂😂 except for one time

[@EricaELove786]

I don’t even wanna date anymore I’m good getting back to the gym and school no time for games and headaches .

[@SamariaaaYaps]

I’m sayingggg , I’d rather just stay to myself because all these mind games , wasting time for some sexual satisfaction is crazy work.

[@EricaELove786]

@@SamariaaaYapsexactly no thanks I’m good my fingers will do!

[@mattanderson6672]

Fantastic discussion Excellent analysis Thank you Sir I always love listening to you

[@kenishatrought5341]

I truly appreciate you for making this video. This was very helpful and affirmed my recent decision to remove myself from the relationship.

[@keriderosso6463]

I needed your words. Thank you

[@tamiam4668]

Love it here! Always very informative

[@ABC-jq7ve]

I think the points are right, but just to play devils’s advocate, people with ADHD may tend to present this way. I’m of the view that generally speaking, you shouldn’t date somebody with severe neurodivergence unless you yourself are neurodivergent or are willing to play caretaker at some point. And I’m also against dating mentally ill men. It’s not their fault they have it, and I am sorry for having to say this, but there are literally MILLIONS of able bodied, healthy, loving, assertive men out there. You don’t need to choose to struggle.

[@hopealivealways]

Been a week since I blocked someone exactly like this after two months of trying to figure out this behaviour. I have been at peace since. Listen!

[@OG_zennedout]

Everything you said is on point 🎯

[@PersianDollTarot]

When I first met my husband the endless chitchat is what made me realize that he was actually genuinely interested in getting to know me, and we are happily married now! You are still single, giving relationship advice, and it’s clearly not 100% accurate because endless chitchat got me married. I’m genuinely confused about this, and there are a lot of high value men who are not really valuable, but people think they are because they have some money and options, but clearly they don’t have that many options, because most of them are single and too scared to get married. Most of them cheat on their wives, or are too loyal to their business to be in a mutually beneficial and happy marriage or relationship.

[@namedrop721]

Use your context clues, sweetheart. Chit chat he’s talking about has no actions behind it Unless you’re a silly-billy, your husband probably had other actions with talking all the time with you The unprompted tangent about men with a good income was weird tho

[@nonyabidness1838]

Can you make shorts on some of these Id love to post this intro

[@simplynikitarose]

Yessir! First comment 🥳🙌🏾♥️

[@shanxoxox8491]

Dont sleep with him hold off aslong as u can a guy waited 7 years he said to get me 😂 and als he wanted was one thing if a guy can wait 7 years but trust me girls theyll tell u wat they want they sleep up listen in the first stages they tell u there intentions accidentally always !!!

[@Li.na_2603]

🥺ooh it happend exactly like that

[@ambarperez8505]

Omg the one before the last one literally happened to me a few months ago

[@darienneff4540]

Tomisin is an honorary girls girl ✨

[@africansister]

13.15 😂 bro these men r so crazy

[@amanda7263]

AND the men who endless chit-chat have NOTHING to do. SAME with women on the other side! Bad news! Ick.

[@OG_zennedout]

Jack rabbit inside of you 😂😅

[@debdesper9963]

Thank you so much!

[@UberZambrotta8]

Lol at you dissing miami 😆😆

[@haidyn1230]

someone pls make a relatable tweet about men who just chit chat 😂

[@caroltouchton4924]

Talk, no action, bye-bye is my reaction 👋🏼

[@annabrooks5591]

Thanks for telling me the truth Mr.Squirtle

[@marciafab7]

This man is the truth. 👆

[@lifeaf4353]

$2000 a month is just rent these days

[@Beehive-o4k]

Right and this us why they want us single poor & in broken homes- the powers that be

[@QueenSereda]

Facts🎉

[@simplyysinaa]

i dont quite get the chitchat one i mean how the heck would u start a bond anyway? im not talking abt hinge n dating apps guys like a guy friend u like

[@dominiquesmith8057]

Constant talking with no goals in mind. Within 2 weeks guys should be talking about the first date. The things with guys I guess they have so many options that it’s hard for them to make a choice or be serious with just one. But I make it easy for them.

[@zzer0_fox]

I relate to your comment. I feel like I need to know a person a little bit if I'm meeting them online. I actually see a lot more men that can't hold any kind of conversation, whatsoever. That will make me never want to see them in person.

[@JudyPop94]

Chitchat more in person. We can’t build an emotional bond with someone over text

[@lorealdrayton6164]

Friend zone play.....

[@sharonstyle]

Bro puhhhreeeaaachhhhhhh!!!!!

[@edembanini7703]

Looool second comment 😂😂😂😂

[@josephinefurman3905]

You’re the best.

[@SunQueen-d7l]

🎉G.O.A.T ❤

[@peanut20002001]

This happened to me. But, I used the data and determined he is on the spectrum 😮.

[@flygirl3544]

Wish I watched this before I wasted two years of my life

[@Khushi-xv6ey]

i have only ever been attracted to these guys, what's the issue with me

[@marieelizabeth2644]

If all men are like this then every woman should stay single

[@charmiedelossantos7654]

Yeah. Guys nowadays 😢

[@nurseannesinspirationalwellnes]

🎉

[@dusya_askar]

👍🏻

[@darlingspade9653]

5:58

[@NoluthandoMthethwa-ei9fp]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@ashroy5555]

this guy made me gf after 1 meet n no date for a month, always promising stuff and can't even send me money stingy. i told him we are in talking stage and I'm dating other men 🤭 I'm actually not. i don't wanna meet any men nor date. and I also don't want him ☺️

[@darienneff4540]

Came here to look for guys to watch out for, realized Im the guy i shouldn’t date 😭

[@nathnath6123]

Thanks for posting this today 🫢 i needed to hear this