If Christians are supposed to forgive, what do you do when you just can't?

I was asked to give this forgiveness workshop at a virtual gathering of CenterPeace, an LGBTQ-supportive Christian organization. Learn more about them here:
www.centerpeace.net
If you'd like to bring me to speak to your group, virtually or in person, visit:
geekyjustin.com/speaking
Want to support more videos like this and get exclusives and extras?
patreon.com/geekyjustin
Chapters:
00:00 Background/CenterPeace
01:42 The Bible on forgiveness
06:36 My forgiveness crisis
08:40 Two forgiveness metaphors
11:12 My usual strategy
19:05 Back to square one
20:45 I was wrong about the burden
26:58 I was wrong about the clean slate
30:15 Three stages
31:35 What forgiveness is not
35:38 Who can be forgiven?
36:40 Eight things you can do
44:49 The process
46:45 When they won’t repent

[@kennethmaese4622]

The hardest part for me is forgiving someone who hasn’t asked to be forgiven.

[@raphael-le3237]

I have a similar experience. I just wanted to say that I managed to forgive her when I said to myself : "Yes, I will revenche. But not against her. It won't help me if she gets hurt. My revenche will be against what she did to me. My revenche will be to get healed from all the traumas I got from her and to be the joyful person she didn't want me to be." And to manage to do this, I NEEDED to understand that what she did to me was intolerable. P.S. Don't hesitate to go to a psy. They are here to help you. If your heart is broken, it's just like if your leg is broken, you have to see a doctor so that it can get better. P.P.S. Sorry if I made English mistakes, I'm still not very at ease with this language. And thanks Justin for the subtitles, it helps (even though they are in English)

[@tvmasterc]

Forgiveness can be the hardest thing ever to do. I know. It took everything I had to forgive my stepmother for saying my best friend was in hell for killing himself. But when I was able to forgive her, it released a burden off my shoulders, a weight I had been carrying for decades. It doesn't take away what she said, but it allowed me to not live in the anger of what she said. I even felt sorry for her. Hurt people hurt people.

[@SomeShavedSheep]

I’d like to share a moment in my life in which I experienced supreme grace…. I was at my Tante’s house some years ago, when she pulled out a photo album. She showed me pictures of her father, and my grandmother. Of the oxcart her brother and father pushed all of the families belongings on, which they could not keep… She told me of their escape from the soviets, only to be held in a ghetto in poland. Of the family that my parents would never meet… And of the guards that kept them there. She had a half dozen pictures of men in black uniforms. She knew all of their names. She told me about Klaus, who gave her his lunch one day because she had not eaten. And she held not a speck of anger in her heart. Now, you might say, she had 70 years to deal with this trauma, yes, thats true… but it’s a trauma that I still deal with today, and I never lived it. The fact that she could let go of that hurt… it gave me hope. That I too, might overcome my grief. And that with love and support, you might too.

[@KennyVert]

Thank you for your transparency, Justin. Love you, brother. ❤️-Kenneth

[@JustinW332]

I've been so hungry for some good teaching. this is some good teaching. and very relevant for me in this time I'm in right now. thanks for posting it.

[@johannesdorr9590]

This is so good and healing! Thank you Justin for taking the leap of faith and sharing this with us. God bless you!

[@dougdarnell3167]

Amen Justin. Great insight and helpful for us all to consider

[@terrifaust4725]

You finally mentioned it near the end - prayer. Jesus can change our hearts in ways we cannot understand if we ask him to through prayer. You delivered such a good and important message, and you would not have been able to do so without having your own struggle with forgiveness. Thank you very much for sharing.

[@multifandom_comfort_charac6894]

Hi! It’s so good to see you back!

[@bruceweatherly6559]

That was perfect timing. I just reconciled an old relationship and I'm still struggling with another one. This helped me figure out how to forgive them both moving forward.

[@KennyVert]

The cycle of pain stops now, in Jesus' name. Help us to forgive, LORD.