IF YOU SEE THESE TRAITS IN A MAN...RUN! | AVOID These Types of Men this Year!!!

[@Katrica670]

1. Vague 2. Lazy 3. Porn 4. Gambling *hiding money 5. Money wasters (paycheck to paycheck), or if he gets angry when you talk about money 6. Dirty 7. Gamers 8. Alcohol dependency 9. Gets fired regularly, or jumps frequently from job to job 10. Men who have children with multiple women **she called it the largest red flag of all**especially if you are young and/or childless. **(which makes soooo much sense!) Thank you!

[@LisaKelly-k8s]

I don’t know why but I feel sorry for men. Always being rated on their ability to provide for others. I find it difficult to just provide for myself (female btw).

[@parler8698]

Run

[@ultravioletpisces3666]

@@LisaKelly-k8s😂😂😂😂 don’t bother feeling sorry for them. Trust me they don’t feel sorry for anything you go through as a woman.

[@ericabridley5679]

@@LisaKelly-k8s Men feel a way about themselves. When they cant even take care of themselves.

[@YouilAushana]

Women don't jump from job to job? Climb the corporate ladder? Don't take accountability for their own crap?

[@Serendipity-gj2me]

100% truth Vivienne. however I would also add an angry man, a bad tempered man, a moody man, a highly critical man, a cynical man and a man who treats his mother badly.

[@ingridbell6769]

I totally agree with everything that you have said.

[@sharonnoble7303]

In addition, an unforgiving man, and one who does not compromise nor being selfless.

[@jenniferu5955]

💯💯💯

[@mariepearl-harbour2335]

And men who have multiple girlfriends or are serial daters...

[@hazeldunson7258]

Agreed 💯

[@angelfire6421]

I once dated a man who said he was interested in marriage. He is a member of the chief executive suite with his company with a salary in the mid $200k. During our getting the know each other phase I learned he was a father of 4 with 3 different women but had no children with the woman he was married to during the time his kids were born. He had no understanding of personal finances and I learned he did not own a home. He often talked about his extensive workd travels, literally completd a course of study at Harvard and golfed nearly every weekend. On paper he checked all the boxes. In reality, I ran like a gazelle. All that to say, it's not always as obvious as the 10 signs listed here. Do your research, pay attention and be willing to walk away.

[@Katrica670]

@angelfire did he have the kids before, during, or after the wife? I'm little lost on that part.

[@NoreLyne]

hahahha😂😂😂❤ I run like a 🦌

[@sumbomarcus]

😂😂😂

[@gerrimiller3491]

Basically, a charmer, deceiver and Satan at work😂 Run from the confusion and lies

[@Vanity-v9c]

Real facts! Pay attention! Actions speak much louder than words!!

[@4WallsDesigns]

I would add … Men who don’t READ! If he never picks up a book or even subscribes to online reading - he’s probably simple. As in not open to learning, growing or evolving. He can’t take you anywhere and won’t be able to grow with you!

[@maydvicky3316]

Exactly, must be ready to unlearn

[@AviatorsVEVO]

stupid requirement. y'all will miss out on your dream man because he uses audible but doesn't read books like an 80 year old smh.

[@deena3003]

That’s a big one too. A man with No critical thinking skills at all is not worth the time or day.

[@Gooseyip]

Ask him about the last book he had read

[@maryjothompson4578]

This speaker is so smart. Men with the qualities she talks about are not grown up, but selfish little boys looking for someone to take care of them. Walk away, and save yourself a world of hurt.

[@taiwoadetunmbi217]

selfish little boys looking for someone to take care of them

[@beautifulplaces2703]

I would add: 11. Someone who wants to marry you very quickly. 12. Someone who is disrespectful, critical of you and/or others . 13. Someone who is lying . 14. Someone who is controlling. 15. Someone who does anything illegal. 16. Someone who is abusive. 17. Someone with bad temper, angry.

[@angelareed4589]

Yes. But only I say within like 5 or 4 months a gut will know if he wants to marry that women.

[@Vv-fl2rm]

Someone who is already married

[@vanoyiam2708]

These toxic traits are some really good add-ones 👍🏽

[@devinagrace1999]

And any man who requires an airline ticket lol

[@maydvicky3316]

Someone who keeps malice

[@DominiqueFrancon]

I’m married to a man who is lazy and financially irresponsible. The red flags were there all along. Miss Vivienne is spot on.

[@BlackBeauty-yl8uq]

I pray for your freedom.

[@Anonymous-pk8bk]

What a nightmare I can relate! Hopefully we both get out ASAP, we will! Save and hide every cent you save.

[@mr.increediblle7964]

@@Anonymous-pk8bkYou know people can change right, not everything you have to run away from. You married him knowing all these things about him.

[@angieb2472]

A lazy financially irresponsible man is my biggest turn off.

[@HumbleBeauty679]

I moved out and filed divorce. Free yourself

[@adaobi_elegantfashion]

I met a man on Christmas day, and he went straight ahead to propose marriage. we don't even know each other. My point it, some men can come with marriage proposal and still intend to use and dump. Stay woke sisters👁👁, may Gods wisdom guide us all.

[@Itslewieo]

Definitely stay away from those men that's crazy

[@JeweloftheMostHigh]

Stay WOKE for real, sisters. They (men) know you know & are setting up more tricks in their bag. God help & bless us all. Single, married & all.

[@marthareynolds8033]

Yes! Don't be fooled by quick relationships that promise marriage and commitment. Give him enough time to prove himself. This fast relationship happened to me and I was so blinded by my desire to be married! Only through friends and relatives did I see that he was not who he pretended to be.

[@GrandSolarEclipse]

If a man shows up and propises mariage, font rush to accept his gifts and pay for your own meals when you go out on dinners. Dont sleep with him. Tell him you will gladly let him take care of you once you are married. Men use money to trap women, and some women are blinded by small gifts and free meals.

[@mariepearl-harbour2335]

​@@GrandSolarEclipseNo let him pay. But don't submit fully until he proves he is worthy of marriage.

[@mariakapwell9123]

Men do not change overnight. You are not there to solve his problems. It is not your responsibility.

[@chanelcarter7874]

Exactly

[@guest11111000000]

Men who are competitive and therefore cannot be happy for you or support you when you make progress or climb higher.

[@taratarat5818]

🎯🎯🚩

[@The_fashioner777]

You're referring to Women, not Men. We don't care what you have or do.

[@HeatherHeadley-cn1ss]

Married to that

[@queenrocksradio2677]

BINGO!!!

[@The_fashioner777]

Your comment makes zero sense, because Men don't compete with women...unless it's a trans, and you women see them as you see yourselves so they're NOT "men", so the only competition comes from other women 😎

[@Rif-hq9ki]

An insecure man with no self confidence is the worst also

[@serwahprempeh3466]

I agree

[@deena3003]

I agree! That’s a major flaming red flag. 🚩

[@Rolhgty]

This type can drag you down and deliberately sabotage your success even when it affects them.They will be more than determined to drown you and themselves in the process.

[@Awkwardsmiles]

Ik someone my girl bestie who watches parn..is it wrong?

[@divinee.155]

Nigeria is the Capitol of low self esteem and insecurities it's so sad thise people are desperate to be liked. They hate women with confidence

[@zurijames9232]

The wrong man in your life will kill you mentally and destroy your purpose in life.Thank you sister for sharing this vital information about men.Keep up the great work.🌷💕

[@sparkle3000]

Expect push back when you start setting boundaries. Never date a man who doesn't have a strong and positive role model. Pay attention to actions and ignore those sweet words. Thank you Vivian

[@SallianneHines]

Sometimes a man who doesn't have a strong and positive role model can be wonderful. He knows what he does NOT want to be and follows his own path. My son is a case in point. A wonderful man, hard working, running a successful business with an excellent reputation in town for honesty and kindness, a great father and stepfather. Even after I divorced his violent father and we finally got away, no uncles or grandpas stepped in to be a role model. The only role model had was me. So if there's no role model, do watch carefully and be cautious, but I don't think it should be an automatic rejection.

[@Inesnes1]

​@user-kn1rc7eq8n I WHOLEHEARTEDLY agree with you ma'am. Ditto for my brother-in-law. He had an alcoholic father, growing up. His father eventually just abandoned him & his siblings even after their mother died. They had absolutely no one. But, he's been married to my sister for slightly over two decades now. 4 adult children later, he still is a hard-working, loving, honest father, husband, in-law, and friend who totally abstain from alcohol 🍸. #THANKS for raising an amazing human being. ❤

[@Katrica670]

@@SallianneHines what about if the male you known for years chooses the worse of the worse to idolize? Think rappers, reggae artists, terrible tv actor. Etc.

[@movingsaudade6028]

I'd take a man without a role model anytime. Idolizing human beings is a very dangerous sport.Im not a teenager anymore.So i don't care if my partner has no role model.In fact, I give him an extra point for not having a role model.I have none myself.

[@sparkle3000]

@@Inesnes1 A woman can't teach a boy how to be a man. Single mothers are everything. I'm a single mother of one daughter myself. She has daddy issues and so do I. When I did date a man who was raised by his mother, there was no woman good enough for him. He also wanted me to be the Alpha. It's natural. That's what his mother was for him. I need that strong male leader. I'm not interested in being Michelle Obama. The mother figure. That's what her husband needed though. He is a good father but we all know who's in charge. 😉

[@Rolhgty]

A man who avoids talking about serious things and wants to talk about nice things only......Runnnnn.Nothing will ever get resolved in your relationship....

[@AviatorsVEVO]

A woman that is always serious, doesn't have a sense of humor & sees every minor thing as a problem that need to be resolved or a red flag.... Runnnn. Everything will be an argument & she will constantly nag you & you will never have peace in your life.

[@kimberlys347]

Amen!!! Where even the simplest discussion is viewed as an “argument”. I have no patience for that type anymore. Grow up! Adults discuss things and dare I say, disagree! 🫢

[@chanelcarter7874]

Tru tru

[@FunHavenWithMichelle]

This is very, very true. He will keep avoiding the difficult conversations, and resentment will continue to build up within you.

[@melindaferreira9879]

This is so on point. You absolutely nailed it. I'm a 53 yr old woman who was so broken I actually stayed involved w a man who embodied all these characteristics and more.. w the exception of multiple children. I cut things off but allowed him to steal 14 years of my life because I was so lonely. I'm so ashamed but moving forward armed with new knowledge and eyes wide open. Thank you Vivian.

[@koolteacher9]

Today is never too late to be totally brand new. ✨

[@carlas3145]

You told your truth and moved on. And that takes an enormous amount of strength and courage. I am proud of you,

[@quantinajones2857]

Thank you for sharing. There is NO shame in gained wisdom.

[@orsolyadr.szepesi8615]

It's not a shame, you are brave!❤️

[@rutbashaheen._.]

hi i have a question, we should avoid men who watch corn but is it okay for a man to masturbate? i mean porn is the problem right? but what about healthy masturbation without watching porn?

[@regalchic]

Great list in addition. A man who is inconsistent; serious today, grows cold feet tomorrow. Hrs just wasting your time. A man who never spends on you. No matter how little he has. A man who is very comfortable with you picking up the tabs all the time. Who even shamelessly asks you for money. A man who doesn't treat you with tenderness, and courtesy. A man who shows no respect for your family. A man who hard

[@GrandSolarEclipse]

Most men are broke or just doing OK. Good luck finding a man with high income. It take time to build funds to buy a decent home , buy a new car and still have money. The middle class is disappearing

[@sskittlezs317]

That’s true everything u say someone that makes sense🙏🏽

[@colorfunch]

Spot on!

[@barbarajansen4912]

That's a good list. This is why I have always been single. There are no available men who have none of these problems. There is actually more to add to this list: 1. Liars. I heard on a talk show a woman whose job was to do background checks on prospective men women met online. She reported that her findings were that 80% of these men are liars, cheaters or scammers. Not very good odds in finding men there. 2. The stingy guy who is never pays for anything but wants to "hang out" with a woman. These men look for good cooks to get free meals. They treat a woman like a buddy so they won't have to spend any money. 3. The men whose values do not line up with Christian standards. These men replace women like a pair of socks. So if you don't "put out", they find no reason to date you. Many men date women and replace them if they don't meet "their needs". 4. The "silent and trivial" man. He replaces authentic conversation with trivialities. He doesn't reveal much personal information about himself and may be hiding things like an arrest record, felonies, or some other violations. He may replace authentic conversations with trivial talk like cars, excessive talk about work, or bragging endlessly without taking a breath to let you talk. 5. The endless talker who has dominated the conversation where he never pauses long enough for you to comment or ask a question. This is a form of dominance and control where all he really wants is an audience. As soon as you try to say something he interrupts and you can never finish a thought. It's like trying to have a conversation with a television set. So, that's my list of experiences I had trying to find a husband. I am 69 and I gave up looking 15 years ago and am happy to be alone when the price of companionship is too high to work with. I believe I've spared my heart years of heartache. At this point in my life I am content with my life.

[@mariepearl-harbour2335]

A man who cannot abide the commandments and statutues in Messiah teachings is best to avoid too. A man who says 'He can't keep the traditional rules' is another red flag.

[@mariepearl-harbour2335]

@MB-iv4mq There are Godly set apart high valued men who are well approved. No woman should have to settle for less just to have a man.

[@mariaamaka]

Exactly! Everyone’s asking why iv remained single but it’s cos i haven’t met anyone without this traits!🤦🏽‍♀️ and I really can’t tolerate them cos to me life wud be unbearable wit this men💁🏽‍♀️ am under pressure to accept whatever I see but I really can’t.

[@Starseed222-i5z]

Omg that number 5 is a huge pet peeve of mines. I was talking to a guy who would love to talk over me and dominate every conversation we had. In my mind I would always say,” If this bit** don’t stfu and let me talk” I eventually cut him off and changed my number. I put up with that crap for 2 weeks. So it wasn’t that long I had to deal with it, but yeah that shit is annoying af. I really wanted to beat his a** for that shit too. Lmao 😂

[@markhicks7171]

​@MB-iv4mq I appreciate you being sensitive and sensible that all of us are NOT like this woman describes. Borderline aggressive feminism . Again thanks for being the most real of all these comments I have read. #ownerof2biznesses #planner #2growndaughters

[@valeriastokes504]

The man who verbally abuses you or controls you from exercising your opinions. Never accept one who physically places you in harm with battering or violent touch

[@elizabethpace1591]

When I was younger I was no naive, thinking things would change. How wrong I was. This is a video that I think a lot of young women need to watch.

[@jcmhanel1]

This is a great list!!! I am so glad you are stating these! I agree 100%. 1) My son has a lovely wife. When they started dating, she said, if he wasn’t looking to get married, she was not interested in dating him. We love her! 2) My friend’s daughter has a full ride scholarship to college. She is so motivated, unfortunately her boyfriend she is “in love with” can’t keep a job. He either goes in later or doesn’t show up. His mother is very well off, and was told she coddles him. She is not doing him any favors: That wonderful young woman that is so motivated is walking down a sad road. I have been married 44 years to a wonderful, hard-working, and loving man! I was upfront with my husband when we became engaged that I was not a good money manager. I was irresponsible. I was very embarrassed about it. We had a long conversation about it and we are on the same page all these years about money.

[@ameryek.9607]

I totally agree with you! And I would add: 1) an angry man; 2) a shopaholic; 3) a man with bad or non-existent relationships with his mother and female relatives. However, a nonreligious man could be fine, unlike what some of the comments here claim. I have many utterly blameless male friends who are not believers. I'd rather have an honest atheist rather some of these religious hypocrites! (Actually, Protestant ministers have a very high rate of infidelity.) You rock, Ms. Vivienne!

[@Sharon-xg1wb]

So no moral compass is okay by you

[@ameryek.9607]

@@Sharon-xg1wb No, of course not! But base ignorance & very misinformed is great with you.

[@angelabluebird609]

Agnostics believe there is no way to know if there is a God or not. Atheists believe there is no God. I agree, many people of quality do not have religious beliefs.

[@angelabluebird609]

@@Sharon-xg1wb Not being religious does not mean one has no moral compass. Many fine, moral people are not religious.

[@beautifulplaces2703]

Regarding non existent relationship with his mother - what if his mother abandoned him or has been abusive ?

[@giulianag.3095]

I stayed in a situationship for 8 months with a vague man that I don't even know where he lives. Everything was awesome until the question "what are we". He always said things like "we are knowing each other better", "soon you're coming to my place" "let's see where it goes", I was naive and fell for this thinking maybe one day he would commit. At the end, I came out of this completely destroyed emotionally because I really liked this person. After 2 weeks that he had broken up with me he was with another chick, doing the same things he did to me once... I'm still trying to recover from this. Not worth girls... She's right, run from vague men!!!

[@KoketsoR7]

It was your fault for getting into a situationship in the first place

[@giulianag.3095]

@@KoketsoR7 Yes you're right. Like I said before, I was clueless and thought we were just knowing each other better before call it dating, so i kept waiting. Only after while I discovered that a man never takes that long to decide if he really wants a girl. Lesson learned though!!

[@onyenmehieihenagarankeoma2070]

Hugs You are so lucky. You will look back and dance with joy. These type of men are skilled destroyers. They waste women’s child bearing years with empty promises. They use and manipulate honest women. *YOU DODGED A BULLET* You don’t know it now. Use this time to improve yourself, build your skills, follow your dreams. By the time you say yes to any man, it will be to a deserving man. Not a manipulator. Because your self esteem is so strong you can spot their BS from afar.

[@Dbaebae]

She's absolutely right. Run from vague men.

[@caseycampbell7929]

Best way for us men to get past a breakup is quickly get involved with someone else.

[@SallianneHines]

I would definitely add a man who is controlling over you (different than protective, very important to know the difference!) and who is violent. And any man who treats animals poorly or violently. But all the others you described too, yes.

[@jcmhanel1]

I use to wonder about my neighbors. I never ever saw his wife outside without her husband. She never went out to get a the mail. Neither did their teenage son. The wife is very pretty and she is about 10 years younger than him. When they were out together, I mentioned, “I was beginning to think you were being held captive in the house. They both laughed. She had no job, no bank account, but did have a very good female friend. (husband) got into an argument and he called the police. She had to leave the house . She went to be with a friend female friend who helped her to find a job set up a bank account and she learned to stand on her own 2 feet. Her husband was arrested for battery, and while he was in jail, she backed up a moving truck to her house, took what she wanted as well as her son and they moved away. before she left, she came and said goodbye gave me a hug and said she feels sorry for his next victim.

[@trudy-annsmall9600]

True

[@chandanak.j5567]

One word ' narcissist' persons to be avoided

[@arianbyw3819]

Absolutely. Someone who is neglectful or abusive to animals is highly likely to be an escalant criminal.

[@oluwatoyin6348]

But some terrible pple can treat their pets better than you. I knew a man like that once. Terrible narcissistic with people, but he loved his dog. It still puzzles me....

[@sandralouise9306]

Some comments below have added an angry man and a controlling man. As a former domestic violence advocate, I so agree!! Just know, that most are very good at hiding this part of themselves, until you become vulnerable in some way; then it may be very difficult to get out. I would add checking out their history to see if there are any assault or domestic violence incidents in their record. I enjoyed hearing about all the other points our beautiful Vivienne gives! :)

[@debimary6812]

I checked out his history, there was alcohol related abuse on record. I ended the relationship.

[@supermommy2717]

This should’ve been a lesson I learned as a young girl growing up, I would’ve made better choices as an adult, but thank you for this lesson, better to learn now than never, on my journey to be more elegant 🙏🏾

[@beedabee1221]

Same here! Now we know and we’re making changes ! Here’s to our best elegant lives! 🥂

[@joyjoy5689]

​@@beedabee1221cheers to you Queens, 🥂God's timing is the best. He can restore and renew us any time any place. Love your energy 🌹❤️🤗

[@tammya5403]

In the states, marijuana is the new alcohol. And it’s worst now because most don’t see it as a hard drug. But it is, I’ve seen people destroy their own lives and never achieve any of their goals due to excessive marijuana smoking. Please avoid men who overindulge in alcohol and marijuana.

[@Nectarine333]

Never met someone who destroyed their life over weed lol and I live in a legal state

[@deena3003]

I know someone who smoked weed for 40year. This person have paranoid psychosis, delusions and impaired memory loss from years of smoking weed. And this person suffers from erectile dysfunction. Weed is a drug with major long term implications. It’s nothing to take lightly. It’s a drug.

[@tammya5403]

@@deena3003 Wow that’s a shame. And when we are grandparents, there will be studies out proving this exact thing, proving the many defects people will experience from ingesting marijuana/cannabis.

[@residentidiot9694]

​@@Nectarine333i have met so many it is scary. This is the new thing they are using to completely destroy black men. They will ever tell you the truth. In the end, why does someone feel the need to indulge in any substance? Why use any if this? Willingly destroying your life.

[@danilaroche1156]

​Marijuana alters the mind. My ex smoked alot and became pretty much psychotic. He was paranoid and anxious all the time. Drug use is actually witchcraft.

[@jacquelinepenha3135]

I will add that a man who doesn't talk much and never gets upset is a relationship is a dangerous man.

[@ShirleyDrake-xx2cs]

Think Chris Watts!

[@sheilaadhiambo-uo3fj]

Thank you so much for opening my eyes

[@preciousmcfarland5265]

Words without action is a red flag for me! Thank you so much for these points elegant lady❤️

[@damarish.torres145]

I didn’t know that them being lazy was due to child neglect. Makes a lot of sense now.

[@BlackBeauty-yl8uq]

Wow!

[@magalufff]

I’m so angry with myself that I got engaged emotionally with such a vague man. it’s turned out that he wants to date me but still misses his ex and that’s why she was treating me so vaguely at the beginning and I didn’t see the signs. Thank God that I was strong enough to end this relationship

[@mariemunzar6474]

Maybe he hadn't fully moved on and that's ok but it sounds as though he wasn't as into you. You probably made a good choice.

[@bernadettekelly8165]

Forgive yourself and move on .....

[@larrywakeman4371]

You are absolutely correct about gambling which includes lottery ticket buying: I know of a man that went into debt SIX figures from buying large blocks of lottery tickets constantly every week, mulltiple times a week for different games- it was sad and an addiction; it ruined his life and put him into bankruptcy... So sad and he was so talented, too.

[@alethiamillner5603]

A man who is never wrong and takes no accountability. A man who is always planning but never acting A man who always yells and triangulates you between others

[@his1day]

Yesssss

[@his1day]

Yesssss

[@aprilmurray4315]

Yes. Yes & Yes!!!

[@regalchic]

Spot on

[@emeraldlong6549]

I just ran from one that fits these negative traits!

[@LB-ku6ry]

Can we just have a checklist that they must fill out before we even meet them? This way we don’t get attached. The video was incredible. I love your messages. They are valuable and easy to understand. Straightforward. Clear. Needed. I’m 60 years old. Wish you where around when I was 16. But better late than never. Thank you and God bless you!

[@icu1777]

Thanks for your understanding on the subject! I had to deal with 1,4,5 and violence. Of course, I lost almost 2 decades of my life. Divorced as a consequence. Lesson learned!

[@DianeVitale-j2k]

Great advice. Would also say to watch out for the men who you pick up on that are SELFISH minded. Ones that only do what pleasures themselves without caring but little in reality for you. Actions speak louder than words. A selfish being cannot truly love.

[@mariemunzar6474]

Yes. This is very important.

[@janetd9163]

Lazy and Video games. Investing hours upon hours on video games and TV, too lazy and always procrastinating is the death of an otherwise productive and successful life. The most heartbreaking part is that many of these individuals have many skills and abilities, intelligent and with great potential if not for these and other vices. Lastly, only THEY can choose to make changes and turn course but you can not do this for them.

[@yvettejones6196]

So true

[@thandizimmermann8275]

Wonderfully clarified and straight to the point! Thank you so much dear Vivienne! So, beautiful Ladies out there, be discreet and use discernment in selecting the right person as your marriage spouse. Our beautiful and lovely Vivienne has already done the task for you. All you need to do is: check out those traits and be warned. Don't be fooled by love bombing.

[@justclicking4366]

As a man. I agree. You can actually use these points on the opposite gender. Instead of video games, I’d say someone who sits and gossips , complains and says every one is against her and also watches reality tv. From show to show. But I totally agree with you on the men also. Since this is about men. I’ll say. I would tell my daughter this

[@Jazzzzzy007]

Preach 🗣️ I avoid ALL of these you listed like a plague‼️ It makes a slim picking of men to choose from BUT it beats dealing with all the dysfunction that comes with what was listed. Great video 🫶🏽✨

[@mazcontrol3589]

If dem nah build yuh up, dem a bruk yuh down.

[@Indigochildwithin]

Omg how true everything you said, You ought to go to schools and speak to young girls...my goodness no young girls of 12,13,14 15 being pregnant, I absolutely enjoyed listening to you and was disappointed the 10 had finished. Thank you for every word spoken. So true. Best wishes to you.🙏😂and I will watch for you again.❤

[@iheboroCarolineurenna-es2el]

Thank you so much Vivianne, as a lady of 22yrs of age, I look forward to having a responsible Man as a life partner, thank you for the tips, it's gonna be a life saver

[@michellefajardo7571]

This video needs to go viral. Thank you for speaking the truth.

[@seemva]

Informative, educational, extremely useful video Vivienne. Thanks for sharing your wisdom with us. I may add one point on sexual fantasies/pornography. Some sexual fantasies have led to deaths of women in different countries. This keeps happening all the time sadly. So plz avoid men who indulge in this POTENTIALLY LIFE THREATENING practices. Seemi from US

[@mazeyakh9]

So true!! 💯

[@reelmermaid8844]

Happy New Year Miss Vivienne and thank you so much for this excellent video. Thank you for broaching the difficult traits you discussed here. My first husband told me he indulged in marijuana occasionally, but that was a huge lie. I also found out he had a very serious porn addiction. It destroyed my trust in him and our relationship. Dear ladies in the comments section if you see these traits, love yourself enough to walk away early. I've learned you cannot fix another human being. Take care all and cheers from Canada!

[@edt003]

You're doing sacred work, Madame Elegance. Ladies, I'm married to the man of my dreams, and she is painfully 100% correct in every way. Stay abundant out there 🙏🏽

[@shereebrown-FoodForFemininity]

This was soooooo well said and literally discussed these issues with my niece.

[@roselynfletcher636]

I am a woman in her early 60s. I wish I had benefited from mentoring such as this when I was a young woman. This is very sage advice and I hope young women of today listen and take it on board. My life and my mental health would be very different today if I had such guidance.

[@elegancaesthetic]

I know this is serious but honestly I laughed a lot. Great points, you explain in an elegant manner much appreciated. As a 23 year old who's never been in an intimate relationship I do appreciate these points for future benefits, Thanks Vivien.

[@jcmhanel1]

She was right!!!

[@mariepearl-harbour2335]

Wait for marriage. With Love and obedience comes marriage and procreation .

[@elegancaesthetic]

@@mariepearl-harbour2335 yes I am determined to wait, thank you.

[@Sangano_Igor]

Be blessed

[@beedabee1221]

You’re on the right track! I love it!!!

[@minkyann8132]

I love how you elegantly say all these things to avoid men with these traits. My ex had some of these awful traits.

[@StacieJoyner]

This is excellent! You give detailed examples all women should see

[@Equity90]

Oh, mine! You are spot on in this video. I have saved it for my daughter to watch. God bless you.

[@AlC-k2j]

Right. Right Right on every single issue. Been there. Done that. The men arrived with massive personal debt. No assets. Alcohol and drug issues. Stealing from employers. Lazy. Unkempt. Filthy dirty. Do NOT my dear elegant ladies be taken in by these creatures. They WILL predate on you and your good nature. Thank you for another wonderful and insightful video.

[@issaextras6549]

My Sista. You are slamming it. A no nonsense delivery.

[@sheilamhungu9812]

I think this video should go viral. All Vivienne said is 💯 correct.

[@felicitysileas1051]

Thank you for a wonderful video. Another point I would add is addiction to marijuana or other types of recreational drugs. These are causing so much harm to families today because the males will make excuses for this behavior. A man with a sober mind is a must!

[@yvettejones6196]

So true! MJ typically ruins motivation in people.

[@phylis3917]

“‘The king you deserve.” Heavy! You better believe it baby!

[@mistressofthedark1476]

You just described my ex to a T, except he was filthy with his appearance not just his house, and he didn't understand why I wouldn't let him touch me. When I would take a shower, or bath, he'd yell " But you took one yesterday!" The only thing he didn't do was drink and play video games, and he stayed with the same company for thirty years, and he only had had children with his ex wife, but the rest described him. We could need something, and he'd say that we didn't have the money, but a poker game would come along, and he suddenly had money. His house still needs repairs, and mice to be gotten rid of from it, but he uses that money to gamble. Listen to Vivian ladies, and run from this type of men.

[@zora99ny]

why did you date a man who was filthy in appearance??

[@proph9916]

But says more about you than him. If he was a dirty man from appearance and you didn’t want him touching you. Why then, did you start a relationship with someone like that? 🧐

[@mistressofthedark1476]

@proph9916 He wasn't that way in the beginning. He was totally different. Then once his mask fell off, I didn't let him touch me again, or be near me. It's one of the many reasons why I left him. He didn't start out like that. If he did, I would've never of had a relationship with him.

[@BlueAvians]

Addiction and sloth combined with no respect for oneself.

[@mistressofthedark1476]

@Cerez78 Exactly and hard to believe that he's a diagnosed Narcissist too. It was me or him and I chose me, because I had never lived like that and I wasn't going to. My Daddy bathed up to four times a day, used deodorant, and changed his clothes, and his Military uniform was always clean and pressed with his rank, medals, and boots shined. My Momma kept a spic a span house, you couldn't find a speck of dirt anywhere and my Daddy was the same way, and I bathed up to three times a day or more, especially at certain times of the month, because my family were just clean people. I carried seven diaper bags packed for my daughter, so if she got on drop of something on her, I could change her and no one would think that I was a bad Momma because my baby was dirty. When I met my ex, he showered twice a day, used deodorant, cleaned the house, and had some pride, but I don't know what happened, and he only went to counseling a few times and I wouldn't let him near me, I went and stayed with a friend. Also him letting his house fall apart and being overran by mice I couldn't take, and I was use to a Daddy that as soon as something broke he fixed it himself or he called someone, he didn't let it get out of hand, and if my parents ever saw a mouse, they'd have every exterminator in the house and my Momma yelling " I don't keep a nasty house, so you get rid of them now!" I just wasn't to living like that and his blasé attitude towards it.

[@maryannsinopoli1751]

Like her ending statement, kick him out of your bed, out of your home and out of your life -Right on- good advice.

[@addiep9554]

Excellent advice Vivian! Women have tolerated too much bad behaviors.

[@theabstractcompany]

This video cuts deep. I know and have experienced/ encountered such men in my lifetime. We must also remember these men are somebody’s son. Being married for almost 14 years and having two (handsome) sons realize the importance of training our children in relationships as well as academics. The book of Esther in the Bible comes to mind when assessing what needs to be done in order to handle unruly men (kings). Prayer and community support 🙏🏽

[@lolajacomino6574]

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 love your advices. All are so in point. Women get blind when they “fall” in love. It is a serious thing, and it happen a lot

[@brittthecancerqueenempress9137]

Excellent points and so very true 💯 she is not lying ladies, I’ve had to cut and get rid of guys like this recently from another source and gut instincts.

[@lumprisca4526]

This is a master piece video. You nailed every point. I am gonna watch it more and more and share it with my friends.

[@moca1296]

These suggestions and or warnings are absolute golden when heard out loud. Thank you 🙏

[@Chosenlaur]

I eat Whole Foods and also take 5B CFU daily, my skin cleared and I also have more energy and healed my period cramps gut health is very important for women ❤thank you for sharing

[@larrywakeman4371]

You ar SO inspiring! Thank you, Vivienne! Amazing list and certainly warranted. Maybe you could present a video regarding how to present ones' self on one's new video channel on KZbin- if ladies, like myself, will be starting a KZbin channel and are flustered, overwhelmed, lacking confidence in front of the camera regarding how to act, how to speak on the videos, and how to present one's topics- that would be phenomenal! Thank you, Kimberly

[@Brendalum23.]

PLS PRAY FOR ME GUYS. IM PRAYING AND HOPING FOR A HIGH VALUE MAN THIS YEAR NOT ONLY FOR A RELATIONSHIP BUT MARRIAGE 😢😢😢😢. IN JESUS NAME AMENNN 🙏🙏🙏🙏

[@ingridbell6769]

So am I. We'll pray and believe for one another. 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@RichGadget2121]

Amen

[@ReinaAfricana]

I'm looking for the same thing so we're all going to be praying together❤ May we all find our soulmates that will also be our husband's in 2024🎉

[@GrandSolarEclipse]

You need to know that when men are not ready to marry they dont take relationship seriously. They have all the time while women have to deal with menopause. 40 year old women are not the best option to build a family. High Value Men, want young women who are submissive, cooperative and non confrontational You need to know that High Value Men have the tendency to cheap. A handsome man with money and education can easily get most women. Most women are interested in the top 10% of men (The High Value Men). They sleep with 80% of the women while the bottom 80% of men have to struggle to get a woman. Good luck finding a faithful High Value Man

[@mariepearl-harbour2335]

Amen . Me too.

[@adaukwuanozie3754]

Very detailed and straight to the point I have always known these but this video came as a perfect fitting to every event that leads to a red flag 🚩 personally I can’t tolerate laziness dirtiness financial irresponsible and even a man that lacks the fear of God I just can’t do it love can never cloud my judgment coz it’s a lifetime and knowing these are livesavers

[@sillafrancisco9030]

It's true. There is nothing wrong with renting an apartment BUT if the man is splashing his money on expensive goods and a flashy lifestyle and also renting then it means his priorities are all wrong. That is money that could go towards investing in property.

[@MichaelBullockSR]

GOSH VIVIENNE A. LADY YOU GOT THE PROPERS AND VERY GRACEFUL TRAITS AMID PROPER BREED LADYSHIP THANK YOU FOR ALL OVERBOARD SHARING AND CARING

[@delanehopkins8333]

Hello Vivian and Happy New Year 🎉🎉.!! I absolutely love this video, it makes me feel like I'm listening to the Big Sister I never had or better still the twin sister because we share the same views and options on so many issues. I do hope other women will take this advice to heart and apply the wisdom from it. All I have to say is Bravo

[@bnepaul9268]

Never be with a man who is addicted to drugs and who is abusive ,

[@senaafisenanu1368]

Thank you Vivienne... Whewww... I clicked on this so fast when I got notified.. Now, this video right here is the game changer. Thank you❤

[@autumnvaughn5889]

This was incredibly beneficial! I wish I would've found you a longtime ago!❤ Thank you, God bless.❤

[@TheAttractionTriggers]

*Love that stammers, that stutters, is apt to be the love that loves best.*

[@rebeccachimuka1398]

That is very true! Thank you. You left out MEN WHO ARE ABUSIVE, whether verbally, physically, or emotionally. And personally, I would also avoid a staunch atheist (those who are not willing to even try to get to know Jesus Christ. "Boy, bye!"). I am a Christian and Jesus Christ is comes first in my life, ABOVE ALL THINGS.

[@ameryek.9607]

You must, of course, choose as you wish. Only don't automatically assume that atheists or agnostics know nothing about religion, god, Jesus, etc. It is unfair & uninformed. Most of them know a great deal about religion; they simply don't believe. I, myself, attended Catholic school for 10 years, have read parts of the New Testament in ancient Greek (the language it was written in, by the way), studied the subject & history. I and many others are quite well-informed. We are Humanists who think this is the one life we have and should spend it living honestly & ethically. When anyone can tell me that all or most Christians do this, I will certainly take another look.

[@tarquinmckay5104]

Abuse is obvious. I like these reasons because they are not spoken about much to the point where most women think that the only valid reason to leave a man is abuse and cheating

[@ChelliChell777]

That’s what I said while listening. She left out the “Abusive man” in all aspects. 🤔

[@carolnalujja4003]

True

[@alexisagginie4574]

Good advice. Thanks. AWARENESS and Self-Awareness is a hell of a friend. This is a friend to keep!

[@ConnieBTV]

I really love this channel. I love the accent and the content. I’ll listen to your vids daily to make progress in life ❤❤❤

[@virginiaholzer7358]

Thanks ♥, a great help for women to wake up and be selective to avoid horrendous problems too late to regret. Kowing these, I would stay single forever ❤

[@amanslife360]

🔥🙏🏾🙌🏾Good video. Keep it up. Not a lot of women talk sense when offering advice to females. You just did. You may consider making a video on why many women select men they should RUN from.

[@AdammaNwokoro]

So many red flags, the last of them a man with multiple children is too much for a woman. Thank you so much for sharing.

[@ninawestlake14]

I think most women are very aware of these red flags in men. Most of the time they allow love to blind them and as most emotions, love is fleeting, and they start seeing clearly. At that time a heap of damage is done wich is sad. Thank you for your crucial content, Vivienne. It is much appreciated. I love your blouse btw. It's really pretty.

[@carolyn6157]

I agree with you.. most women see these red flags and to their own demise their life and many years get destroyed stop avoiding these signs. Stop being desperate. you see them I know you do, run from them. You're hurting yourself and then cry woe is me

[@agustdrip1960]

I agree women generally has strong intuition and see all the red flags but love blind them or they may think he will change in the future ..

[@SYAgencies0379]

I agree, wholeheartedly. Great relationship Tips.

[@ChildOfYHWH-jx2vv]

👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿❤️❤️❤️❤️amazing you have covered everything! Wow! Thank you for your teaching!!

[@devinagrace1999]

Great advice! I probably would also say Avoid men which require an airline ticket

[@amaj_lex]

The boxer shorts have brown stains. I'm sorry that was hilarious!!!! This video was everything!

[@Victoria-g5k4l]

So true, I had to run away fast from the guys you mention hun.

[@cheryljohnson6542]

There could be no men left to choose from w/this list.

[@izagiirebabra6803]

Thank you my beautiful elegant Vivian I have really learnt much from you.watching from uganda

[@nellylummytv758]

Best relationship advice ever.From the beginning,you can tell if a man is vague or not from the way he communicates.

[@eastafrika728]

Most men find it difficult to psychologically detach from the privileges they got from their mother as babies, especially the feel good sex chemical oxytocin released during breastfeeding to get the child to like feeding, they turn women and everything into their mother, expecting physical satisfaction of food, sex, security and social entitlement that they got from their mother, from everyone and everything.

[@rosemarygiraud2586]

Excellent! 💯% If a woman doesn't get this, she needs help. ❤

[@ishitamehtaniart]

Thank you for sharing this video.

[@FrancesScannapieco]

I really enjoy your channel and your wise words. Thank you so much. I ordered your book!

[@qesther1241]

Even if the children are adults (3 kids never married) total red flag.

[@amaj_lex]

Agreed!!!!

[@fazeelafazal8615]

Well said Woman of Elegance 🌹I agree with you. Don't be with a man who is not looking for a wife. If he just wants a maid to take care of him, to sleep around with, is not financially stable, does not take care of his health and home and all the other things on the list in the video then he is not the right man. Women have to raise their standards and don't settle for less. Treat yourself like a queen ladies. No man has a right to sleep with you if he is not your husband 💍

[@LittleSanch]

Thank you for this video Vivienne! It was very informative ✨

[@lizzieam12]

Wow thank you so much Vivan Fantastic advice, I've all the men I have dated has all the characteristics mentioned here. Hence why I'm now single searching for my Kingdom husband in Jesus name 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾 I have been praying everyday and God will surely make a way.

[@chloewinfrey]

dating consciously and mindfully 😊

[@Denisebemmett]

I pray nobody house is like you described. Good tips! Blessings. 🙏

[@carolkerr1761]

Thanks for all your tips really help full