8 Things you should NEVER say to a Man!

[@rebeccadirks5385]

1. “Men value respect: don’t disrespect. even once can have long term effect of resentment. Rise to be an elegant lady. 1. “You’re Not a man” 2. “How dare you” 3. “All men are trash” 4. “You’re not my type” 5. “There are better men out there that will like me” 6. “When are you coming…”. Wreak of a desperate woman. Love will be compelling. 7. “ I “don’t know why I’m wasting my time with you!” 8. “Be a man!” “Man up” Watch your words carefully Great video…worthy of many revisits Classy Lady!

[@tahariobi391]

I never interrupt my husband or over talk him. When he is finished talking, if I don't agree, I will say I see it slightly differently. If he's in a " mood," I never press the issue. I'm very patient and wait for the right time to introduce my idea or point of view. I've never failed with this approach.

[@MaryamKhan-vf3zo]

With men,...it's all about strategy! The key is to never press!

[@deegassaway6854]

❤ thank you for sharing.

[@JustinaUghNo]

This is a good strategy thank you for sharing ❤

[@winfredpaul3439]

This is good 👍 I really want to learn this

[@aminatamonicasesay3256]

I'm proud of you

[@teresamurray9225]

I've missed you. I am very lucky my husband and I respect each other . I've been married for 15 years staying strong. Hes so kind to me. We never say hurtful words to each other. I am truly blessed.

[@Purpleiciousbabe]

❤❤❤

[@lauriejordan2716]

If a man is rude or disrespectful towards you. Quietly walk away. Don’t downgrade yourself to his level. We are above that. We certainly do not need to accept any negative behavior. We just don’t need to become the exact thing we dislike. We have the ability to walk away with our dignity in tact. (This 100% does not apply to women in abusive or controlling relationships. You ladies deserve no judgment, just prayers for a safe outcome)

[@yinyangcalmness178]

My thoughts exactly.

[@twoten2547]

Thank you for remembering those in an abusive and controlling relationship. Nothing good or any good gesture is recognized. If a man is abusive he is abusive no amount of putting yourself down will change the way he treats you. It's mental issue.

[@ilovepdub]

Walking away aint always possible . I've been attacked for walking away. Defend your self at all cost. Standing up for yourself isn't degrading yourself

[@lauriejordan2716]

@@ilovepdub Oh absolutely, I apologize if I did not make that clear. That is what I meant when I wrote that this advice 100% does not apply to any form of abusive relationship. I completely agree that in those horrific situations you need to do whatever it takes to stay safe. I truly apologize if my wording was unclear. I sometimes have trouble articulating in writing what I am trying to convey. Again, prayers to all who find themselves in any unhealthy situations and/or relationships.

[@yeneMB]

Yes, very true

[@go2yourself]

Yes! I'm 60+ yrs...We were taught this by the older women in the family early on growing up... thank you for bringing us back to the proper foundation ❤❤❤

[@alfredbenedek3398]

One of the very best tapes I've seen. These advisements do work, for men, as for the ladys. This a tape what is very rare. - ( Just don't let either party go over board? ) Try to come , to a commom denominator / common understanding = communictaion & asking foregiveness & giving foregiveness. It makes a huge - huge difference.

[@oneoutoftheninety-nine.3314]

So I have been single for about 8 months and my ex hurt me alot. I did love him. But up until now I am genuinely sorry for some of the things I said to him. We weren't good for eachother and that's still hard for me to grasp. I'm just going to try my best to never make the same mistakes again. Lord help me as I try.

[@marieperpetuemoncoeur2954]

Same here…. 🤐

[@LydieLove.]

I'm in this situation too 🥺😭💔

[@jojoslay1700]

Me too 😢😢😢

[@G1m2121]

Everyone makes a mistake in saying or doing the wrong thing, men and women. That's where forgiveness comes in place. Otherwise we would all be perfect and no one is.

[@Luckystoic]

I'm 80 years old, I've never heard such true words, thank you for sharing them.

[@esthereffiong2496]

I've been married for 5yrs now and I have never argued with my husband, I go completely silent when he's angry,or when he brings up a topic angrily, sometimes he may be the one at fault but I always wait for him to calm down then we talk and iron things out. This is really working for me

[@amdianec3847]

No couple is perfect, and they all argue whether it is a big or small argument, but they can always get through it if they have respect and love for each other.

[@theautochecker]

As a divorced man who has been through the mill, I say you are mostly right. Unfortunately most high profile /alpha /high value women I are unable to leave their work time weapons at the door when they get home . Many such women feel the need to fight to get their opinions across. As much as men like to be right (due to our logical way of thinking) we do appreciate a woman who can tactically prove us wrong. A smart and supportive woman is a huge asset. We will do anything to keep her. PS: keep up the good work

[@ikeameltdown8012]

This kind of respect should go both ways. I appreciate this perspective. Let's bring class back to relationships!

[@ShaniOnSinai]

My ex husband and I had a very tumultuous marriage. He was quite smart in what he was doing each day to destroy the sweetness I had, because he knew the marriage was destined for divorce. He disrespected me so much that I had to develop a character to deal with it. But he wanted to destroy me for all future relationships and program a call and response that would always lead to destruction. I realized this and began to unprogram myself and it took 5 years. I now do not engage with men like that, only gentlemen, and I never have to raise my voice. I just have to be sweet even when they may be annoyed and they melt. It really is just a better way for me to live.

[@mstwelvedeadlycyns]

Interesting

[@rosiestewart870]

my first marriage was abusive in many ways, too. i remarried after many years, and was treated with love and respect. i am now widowed, but feel thankful that i married for the second time.

[@moreblessingkuchenga909]

He was a narcis

[@DandyDuh]

Same, my Ex husband was a Narcissist, Sociopath & with a dash of Psychopath.. Some people are sent from the 👹 to destroy us. And then there are some who are simply Heaven sent to help, bless, guide & love us... That's why praying, having Godly discernment & wisdom is very valuable 🙏🏼🥹

[@gretchenburton7184]

Only gentlemen is the key. I went through a similar situation when I was very young and it continues to this day. I am now 77 and a widow from my second husband.

[@Beth4Life100]

As a counseling psychologist, this is EXCELLENT advise on all levels. 😊

[@CJ-ku4ej]

Leveling up must be done equally. A successful couple admires each other’s strengths and attributes, but more importantly is allowing respect, boundaries, friendship, trust, healthy communication during difficult times, allowing space for growth and teammates throughout your journey. The work continues at every turn. Both men and women need to step up and do their part for a healthy relationship to rise and stay on top.

[@CJinHumboldt]

I think it can be said that if you have to say any of these statements to your partner then you need to re evaluate your relationship and he may not be the one for you.

[@lauriejordan2716]

Very well said!

[@olajohnson6266]

You need to re evaluate yourself first for having a loose tongue... You don't have to say any of those things to your partner whether you feel he's the one or not... Simply walk away

[@stillstonie]

Exactly. The RIGHT man deserves your best ❤

[@timeeak4599]

You may not be.the one for him either.

[@imperiocollectives9262]

​@@timeeak4599 still d same tin🤷‍♀️

[@kaycee7733]

Great advice and lessons! It’s also important that men respect their partner or wife in front of the children. This sets the tone in the home. Once a woman is disrespected in front of the children problems begins amongst both sides, mother and father. The man is the head and he sets the tone in the home and the lady is to make the house a home. As a woman I learned that silence sometimes is power when it comes to being angry because words is something you can’t take back.

[@ericadunomes]

I remember seeing women around me talk horribly to their men, and I vowed never to do that to the man I would date. Men have feelings too. And we must think about how important it is to treat people the way you would want to be treated. It matters more than we think.

[@ellamanuella8038]

My neighbors wife does that and it's horrible 💔 you can see the effects on the children

[@charliesmith6564]

Thank you I hear these negative remarks from other women in conversations. Don't understand why men stay.

[@kimciszek-kane397]

Agree

[@Sweetintent30]

Exactly I tell my daughters this all the time. I was married so long because of the respect and support I gave their father. I couldn’t imagine how it is to be a man, with everything they have to deal with. They are our leaders and why would you want to hurt them.

[@enoekanem1480]

I'm a much older woman and consider this a very wonderful piece. A forever blissful marriage can be built on these your advice. I respect you my daughter. God bless for touching lives positively.

[@ericjay2770]

This is too good to listen pls if your single I propose marriage pls wonder piece.

[@TheUnknownSees]

Well, I'm a man that just happened to stumbled across this video, and I must say that, even though I should not, I'm surprised that there is such wise ladies like you out there. Living and learning. But I tell you one thing, certain kind of men reaches a point in life when its prepared to accept life just the way it is, and women like you, is not easily find in every corner.

[@tr1707]

Yup! After hearing this advice, I thought about how amazing she is, as a woman 🙏🏿

[@franciscawaigwa2779]

That was a lesson to learn. Ladies, think b4 u say it.

[@chedzamarobela466]

Always wondered why some men stay in abusive relationships, or seem to prefer abusive women to women who give them respect.

[@sharonbartley808]

​​@@chedzamarobela466Something is wrong with them is what.

[@dorothynason6934]

I have been with my husband for 46 years and everything you brought up is so very true.I really appreciate how wise and elegant you are Vivian.Thank you❤

[@wendymaluleke824]

Man avoid woman who generalized them, avoid calling him a dog because even you will not like to be with a man who thinks all woman are crazy. Stop making him think he is not good enough,never compare him to another man, stop hurting him but love him for who he is, thank you my friend for sharing and much appreciated.

[@zuzilezungu5899]

Hayi bo! There's so many of us here !🇿🇦 🇿🇦

[@Cal_me_lady1]

Wow, if a man wants you he will move heaven and Earth to be with you , I love it🙏 thanks so much

[@gailbaumann8262]

What beautiful message..how many marriages might have been saved if words were chosen carefully..ty

[@deegassaway6854]

❤ Amen.

[@kimberlyturner820]

It's always words.

[@elizawanjiru709]

Wonderful message

[@hajiag854]

exactly 💯

[@tr1707]

I totally agree. Words carry weight!

[@normanmerritt1395]

Husband here: I cannot discuss my opinions about various issues with my wife (political, social, etc) because she only want to talk if it directly affects our children or household. I hear her talk about her opinions on issues and I may disagree and want to get to the heart of the matter to understand her reasons deep down why she feels that way and express why I feel different and she shuts me down assuming that I’m just regurgitating political talking points and won’t hear it. As a result I feel disrespected and unheard. Then I don’t want to talk with about issues that she may even be interested in discussing with me for fear of similar reactions. I feel like to her my opinions don’t matter and I’m already married to her so I feel like there is nothing I can really do but tolerate. So I compartmentalize and maybe even lie to myself that I love her to keep the status quo. I do have love for her for her many qualities but this feeling lingers and is exacerbated when she lectures me about things she has told me already a hundred times before. (Telling me she doesn’t trust me) I find myself getting distant from her and I don’t like it. So I make an effort to get close but I feel we can’t talk freely about whatever I want to talk about so I just go off and watch television or something. I love her but feeling disrespected I feel trapped. She hasn’t apologized for anything and admitted wrong doing in twenty years of marriage and rarely expresses gratitude for things I do. (I’ve apologized a thousand times) When she had told me she wants me to do things and I finally do them and change my habits she acts like it is a basic expectation and doesn’t change her level of affection towards me and I express to her often that I need more affection from her. I always give the affection but feel like I rarely get it initiated from her. She readily accepts affection but I never feel like she initiated it. As a result I feel like crap. Tell your sisters that this behavior is a mistake and they should look for the signs and avoid them. Before I resigned myself to this reality and simply accepted it I attempted (but failed) self deletion twice but later just focused on other things in life to keep me sane and decided I would hurt too many other people in my life if I ever succeeded in that. So I simply exist. I wish I felt like I could really deeply communicate with my wife but it doesn’t really happen much. I don’t feel like she wants me and intimacy involves me always focusing on her enjoyment but never her focusing on my enjoyment. So I often wonder if she really loves me. So I admit I feel depressed and I’m just working to recognize the signs and trying to work on myself to work through it. I’m making progress but it is a long road.

[@ruthsayuni4203]

So sad hope God will change her

[@mbyrd6713]

Thanks for sharing. I’m watching this video and cringing at the things I’ve probably said to my ex-husband. We were married for 11 years I didn’t see the damage being caused by my words. I asked him to go to counseling with me but that was only to confront his behavior. I just started going to therapy and seeking God for myself and I feel amazing. I really tried to be a good wife but I just didn’t see the blind spots. I pray that you and your wife receive the healing you both need. However, I would say that going to therapy for myself was the best thing I could’ve ever done. Now, no matter what happens, I’m at peace with my life.

[@trisha4given]

Hopefully you get this. I just want to say thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your heart. It makes me sad. I pray you find hope today. I don't know if you are a man of faith, but be reminded God loves you, He sent His Son to the cross for you. Also, I want to thank you bc your comment made me evaluate my own marriage and my lack of initiating intimacy, sharing your story was not in vain. Please seek out help. You are loved. You are not alone!

[@yaaeerrgghhh]

You're doing amazing . I'd probably be breaking down crying everyday from that. Hopefully you can find affection from someone else or have a deep conversation with her about how you feel.

[@nikkinicole5216]

Have you asked God to help you and your marriage? He will if you ask and if you are true.

[@Ekjunior-y7v]

Yes true men we do cry ,we got feelings too. it's very heart breaking to hear such words.all we need is respect 😢

[@fragrancedeparadiso443]

Vivien, I'll cast my vote for you as the woman of the year. I may not yet have mastered how to exercise self control the way you or some women out there may have, but at least I can decern sound advice when I hear one. I pray God takes you from glory to glory

[@sophieallen1898]

Very profound! Thanks for sharing... truly appreciate

[@jacquelinesmith-gaston2071]

Very good and solid information here. I've been married now for almost 23 years, and I learned early on not to make my husband get on the defensive...he is 100 percent man. And I love it! We had a long discussion regarding what I'd said, and that was that. Got a big kiss, some flowers and perfume at the end of it all. I love him!

[@dianambabazi-cy1hw]

I love every single word you said.. Thanks so much for bringing values back in the society that has lost discernment , have less tolerance , no manners and Less patience.

[@elizabethidowu6122]

I so much love this. Thank you. I'll start practicing all of of this. But sincerely this can be very difficult when the man says all these words to you when he's angry, and sometimes you feel like saying them to him too, so he feels how it hurts and maybe change. Retaliation with same manner of speech seems the only way to let out your emotions and forgive the hurt. I know two wrongs don't make a right. But may God help us.

[@aartitrivedi394]

I was very disrespectful to my husband in the past and said many hurtful things out of anger but over the time I am improving my language and your video popped at the right time. Will be very careful with my words in the future and thanks a lot for this wisdom.

[@tladimakuse7445]

Emotional intelligence is key in any relationship irrespective of who they are, respect everyone including your children because that how they learn to treat others including themselves❤

[@eyesuckle]

Speaking as a man who stumbled across this video (ended up in my feed, somehow). . . what wise advice you offer! You have a cool head and a great ability to see things from another person's point of view. Particularly, a man's point of view. All of the statements you warn against are very hurtful to a man and damaging to a relationship. On behalf of those of us with a Y chromosome. . . thank you!

[@montsedilaz5799]

Thank you for this video 🙏🏾 I grew up in an environment where disrespect and bad behavior were very normalized. I found myself saying a lot of things that you mentioned in your video to my partner and didn’t realize how hurtful it could be 😢 I’m currently working on this ❤️

[@ijeomajane5225]

Exactly. Me too 😢

[@phoebebarron6724]

This video is EVERYTHING!! I learned so much from this video and sadly I said ALL of these things just last night!! I feel so bad😞I will start working on this as of right NOW!! Good luck to you as well🙏

[@gina1304]

🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@iamjacquejohnson]

Thank you Sis. I appreciate you sharing with all of us. I had the incredible opportunity to grow up around my AMAAAZING Grandparents who were married for 62-Years before my grandfather passed away. I watched my grandmother apply each and every one of your points throughout my life and am truly grateful for her teaching me the right way through her demonstration. Lots of ladies did not have this kind of teaching in their upbringing. I appreciate you reminding me too to keep a guard over my words and continue speaking with love and kindness always. Blessings to You from America🌻💖

[@Time_With_Gozie]

Dating/Marrying a woman who can't control her mouth when she's angry is like dating/marrying a man who can't control his hands when he's angry. Thanks for the insight, I'm a New SUBSCRIBER 😊

[@phathisanimlotshwa9291]

Thank you Ms Viviene. Your advice is a powerful cement that keeps marriages strong and intact. There was a time i lost my job and became a victim of verbal and physical abuse from a wife who thought i was no longer man enough to take care of the family. I received all sorts of verbal abuse. But i kept trying to keep the family together. She was working somewhere and she kept on telling me that i was now useless. The pain was growing inside me everyday. One day i tried to jump infront of a moving train to end my life but God intervened. I ended up going to a faraway place where after a lot of struggles i ended up being uplifted to success by Gods grace. But some broken hearts will never mend.

[@Ad-Lo]

Thank you for not taking your own life.

[@barbranyanchama5791]

Glory to God

[@popliza_17]

Oh no that was so INHUMAN m sorry 'bout your ordeal my brother. 1 word of advice, pls never think of taking your life because of someone, God created you because He loves you , you are his TREASURE. Stay strong mkhaya, hope you find another job. I wish you all the best in future❤🎉😊🇿🇦

[@pattiedavishepburn8719]

This is very powerful. I applaud you sir. God has you. I am very moved to hear a man expressing himself 🎉❤

[@lailaalanna315]

No matter what these men do, you can't say anything about it or they get offended 🙄. My ex did so much nonsense and everything I said to him about it was an an issue. I've never used any of these statements and he was still feeling disrespected. I had to end things.

[@kaykay7271]

Same

[@nakeriahunt2316]

Exactly and it is so annoying. I understand accountability, but I flat out refuse to excuses a man’s disrespect while someone tells me to level up for the sake of femininity. I do agree that walking away is the best strategy altogether. One sided accountability is beyond gross in this world.

[@i.s.realestatesaffirmation1741]

You did great by leaving. No one has to stick around to continuously be mistreated. Narcissist are ones who will project Everything back on you. In that case, 🏃RUN fast.

[@patswassy9124]

if your man felt disrespected and you dont know why? you are in the wrong. simple as, same vice versa

[@censusmarega8402]

shame on you

[@miss_bb2]

Thanks for saving me. My boyfriend has been driving me crazy for the last few days and I was ready ot drop a bomb of words on him this evening. Thank God you shared your thoughts now I know how to tackle the issue

[@zuzilezungu5899]

Hayi bo! There are so many of us here 🎉 🇿🇦 🇿🇦

[@miss_bb2]

I guess 😅

[@ThiaChiammy]

We're plenty 😅

[@lydiarobinson2893]

Me too kkkkk

[@yeneMB]

As the same time not saying these words to the man is indirectly you are not happy at him and no need to say negative word So,dear ladies let's start to be calm even if they are life killers 😏

[@princessirulancorrino4695]

My dear Miss Vivienne: This video comes in the right moment in my life. Your advice and wisdom continues to be a treasure for me. It made me realize how in many interactions with the wonderful man in my life I’ve lost control and especially how I’ve abandoned my energy as an elegant feminine woman. Thank you from the deep core of my heart ❤

[@oneoutoftheninety-nine.3314]

Same here. I've always said they hurt me, he hurt me.. but I hurt him, too. And up until now I haven't realized to what extent I have hurt him.

[@Sketchbook999]

Good on you. I am glad you found this video o time.

[@tr1707]

Blessings Queen

[@dorcaswodera6564]

Like the lesson❤

[@givenmwene3739]

As for me my man everytime were together his been busy charting with different girls, wen asked him he will just say these are my business partner, 🤷Wen he teaches my phone he will make sure to insaut all my Mel friends. So what should I do iam thinking of moving on with my life iam sick n tired of his behavior.

[@karencollins2440]

These are excellent points! Truth be told, men have very delicate egos. Even the most secure "seeming" man has insecurities. The most important thing to a man is respect. If you always show respect to your man, even in times of anger, you'll come out ahead in the long run. He will also be more likely to show you respect in return. This is the most valuable advice you'll receive. Remember it, and practice it!!

[@lbrown2721]

You are a million per cent right I got rid off a woman off twenty some years and five kids one off the most disrespect full and insulting and violation off a woman I ever met in my life time keep teaching and preaching sister you are a genius

[@marycollins5428]

I'm aware how fragile a man's ego is, but I will give no man respect that does not give me the same respect. His feelings are no more precious than mine. I can walk away as long as He is not a narcissist which my last one was. He almost had me trained to think that it was okay for him to talk any sort of way to me but could never take it when I responded. Needless to say it's over. I was lucky and I recognized his behaviors as those of a raging narcissist. In a normal healthy relationship I could do the things you suggest.

[@elizabethpace1591]

I can well understand why men find it difficult to approach a woman at times. It is not easy at all. Although I did have an ex say to me that there are better and prettier woman out there than myself, what you said makes a lot of common sense.

[@priyaagarwal7068]

I always try not to make these mistakes but through your videos I learn to be so much more mindful of my actions. thank you very much Vivienne for educating us so wonderfully.

[@NavyCJ216]

I had my ex wife say that she had men in her FB inbox asking her out on lunch or dinner dates as if I was gonna be mad. Straight up told her “Go ahead and enjoy” Left her soon after.

[@antimol4593]

Thank you woman of elegance. You nail it on the head. I hope and pray that your marriage is peaceful and blissful forever. Amen.

[@bolurin]

I feel it took courage and perseverance to do this Miss. Vivian. Thank you for helping me grow through your well thought out act.

[@stanleykena7464]

As a man I consider this video as one of the best advice for the women . These are really what we the men expect from our women bust some women don't understand these and they mess up with their men . Thank you for the best advisory video. God bless

[@patriceesela5000]

Fellow man here and I co-sign

[@ProsperNyawuza]

Ditto

[@Cat-ik1wo]

I just found you. I am making your videos my course of study for self improvement. You reminded me of how and where i used to be. But situations beyond my control had me slipping. I want to get back on track and be better than I was before. I want to achieve a higher level, emotionaly and mentality.

[@ms.ednapost]

If a man “deserves to be disrespected” a woman should not be with him. I ripped my ex husband to verbal threads to the point he cried and said in over 25 years he had never seen me talk to anyone like I had with him. I apologised and felt bad I had lost all decorum. But I knew once anyone brought me to the level I didn’t need them to be in my sphere. Vivienne is correct…it’s all about the individual woman and her remain a woman of elegance.

[@sassyperry6382]

I love this channel!!!! Vivian/Vivienne is an amazing woman who is empowering women all over the woman. God bless you!!!

[@cajetan159]

What a beautiful thought. You have just hit the nail on the head. Respect is more important to men than anything else. I appreciate your video and honesty so much.

[@originallordthunder693]

That's so true most women who disrespect there good man 90% of them go away and never come back and most women wasn't brought up to love and respect there good men I have been down that road before and my love turns to hate for the woman that I have love so much a valued man will not go back period

[@ccs1161ify]

The right kind of man will love, appreciate an articulate and elegant woman! Etiquette is essential! Just celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary.. ❤Thank-You for your channel.. The world desperately needs more etiquette.

[@calypsod1614]

WOW...insightful video Vivian 🙏🏿thank you. I am a mouthful woman with self-control. Sometimes my emotions do get in the way and stepped on a man's ego.

[@timcottom8397]

Hi my name is Timothy, your video was in my feed I never have seen you or your videos. I thought I would watch to see what your all about. When you opened your mouth and began to talk, I fell in love with you! I have never heard a woman speak like you. You do know men, and how we think basically. You make me want to seek out a woman of elegance, but even more important to become a man of high value! When the two meet, there will be nothing they can not accomplish!!! Have a great day! Timothy

[@zillahkapa4139]

I don't have patience when my husband does wrong and want to apologize, I always put him at awkward position, your video helps me make up for all the ill treatment I give to my man. Thank you!!!

[@bethaminkhan4951]

All true and I do not think that I have seen any other direct and honesr video like this... Great advice.

[@ThiaChiammy]

The notification came just at the right time, i really need to learn how not to use hurtful words. I really need to. So help me God, I'm trying to be as soft and respectful as possible. Life's already hard to tackle it the hard way. Thank you very much🥰🤎

[@scottbrunner9176]

Spot on recommendations. I completely endorse your list and recommendations. Yes, a good man will move heaven and earth for a truly elegant woman. I fly as often as permitted to see my exceptional and elegant lady in London in part because she has never spoken anything like what you shared. Always elegant, unpretentious, and approachable has worked for me. This sister and I video chat many times during the week in addition to our efforts with flights across the pond. I enjoy spoiling her and never feel like I am even trying to do so. It comes naturally. I only today discovered your channel. It is a refreshing antidote to the some of the toxic alternatives available to women. Keep up the good work.

[@raeannravello3350]

This a wonderful piece of advice yet its Such heavy advice to digest, especially when the man treats you like crap and you are the only one trying.

[@erniet]

I couldn’t agree with you more! Excellent!! Any woman who ignores this does it at their own peril. ✌🏿😊

[@tomlight8227]

Hello, Vivian. you are SO AMAZING! I love your, your wisdom words SO MUCH! I can listen and watch you speak all day. my name is Devotha Light, and I do relate so much to the words that shouldn't be said to a partner that makes their heart turn around. some words are so damaging, like a scar, and no matter how many apologies, a scar can't go away. it only leaves you physically present but emotionally dead. thanks. I hope more people can try to listen to you.

[@Tropicalbliss45]

Thank you so much Vivienne! I wish they could play your videos for every woman to hear. So many have gone so far from this self-respecting way of living and have normalized boisterous, unkind, vindictive, venomous behavior that it's unsettling to see how they disrespect their men. I am embarrassed for them and sorry for the men who think they have to put up with this behavior. Keep up the good work. I plan to use this video in church to help our females; the old settled ones and the young coming up. You are quite a refreshing breath.

[@panimanianprincess]

This Video Goes For Men As Well . Women Of Elegance Select A Quality Man Who Works or Has His Own Business. Women Of Elegance Should Also Work or Have Your Own Business . Never Be With A Man That Values and Respects You and Himself . Never Be With A Man That Doesn't Care About Your Well Being or Your Children Well Being. Know The Red Flags Of A Narcissist 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩and Don't Deal Him You Will Never Win In The Relationship. Make Sure A Man Can Hold His Own . Never Allow A Man To Use You . If You Don't Have A Voice In Your Relationship Leave Him.Alone . If You See Your Relationship Is Onesided Consistently That Man Isn't For You. If A Man Talks Down To You Or He Is Verbally Abusive ,Emotionally Abusive , Financially Abusive , Physically Abusive ,Constantly Manipulative and Constantly Gaslights You , Get Out The Relationship and Go No Contact !

[@geraldinehatcher]

Thank you for your words of wisdom. You are very wise. So many marriages and relationships would’ve been saved if we treat people the way we want to be treated 😊

[@NewWaveGirl30]

Exactly. No one wants to be put down. Especially when they're trying to do good things

[@marvelousnwankwo2249]

Ehee!!😂 I was about to say one of those words. But I'm glad I've been corrected. My journey to elegance has been paying off through your videos. Thanks alot 😌💝

[@dimplemaheshwari6945]

All the points were so relevant, we women do feel like venting out.. But if we really like a guy, we must control.. and not only with guy with everyone around so that you hv the best relationship with people.

[@naomi_isaac_]

This channel has become my addiction. These are the kind of videos I want in my feed. Thank you Vee ❤

[@presidentspilot]

WOW!! You nailed it, COLD!!...and it works the same way in disrespecting your PRECIOUS WOMAN!! BOTH NEED TO SHOW RESPECT TO THE OTHER!!

[@mkneal58]

This is the most constructive video I've ever heard! You're on point lady!❤

[@sandraagnes777]

Well noted Vivian ❤️💕❤️. Thanks darling. Greetings from Uganda 🇺🇬🇺🇬🇺🇬🇺🇬🇺🇬🇺🇬🇺🇬

[@michellenabatanzi1123]

🇺🇬🇺🇬

[@janettemccuien4249]

I really enjoyed this message. I have been a Widow many year's. I really believe if it is the will of GOD ALMIGHTY, in the future to be blessed with another husband.....this information will help me.

[@zoradawkins9247]

Thank you! This was very helpful. I'm the 8years of my relationship I recall using one of these not so good statements to not say to a Man. " How dare you" Not recently but I have said it in the pass. I'm grateful I have grown pass this and he was and still is patient with me. This video is very much appreciated.

[@naomiri3837]

Respect is the most important thing. Thank you for the reminder. You are very beautiful btw ❣

[@mattendo-retrogaminguk3584]

Yes this is excellent. I’d also recommend along with those other alternatives that are far more appropriate towards a man is the tone of voice. Tone of voice invokes respect in a man. If you shout during an argument you’re more likely to have your words ignored by the guy as he still expects to be respected in an argument and having 2 heads battling is really unhealthy. So using a much softer tone of voice when speaking your thoughts and feelings are far more likely to be received better and will encourage better more fulfilling conversations in the future

[@tr1707]

Thank you for teaching women about the things that are important to men. The more we understand the things that are important to us, the happier we will be when functioning as a unit.

[@tr1707]

*the more women understand

[@charitytumubweine3989]

Thanks so much my lady for the tips , my mouth once landed me into trouble I almost lost someone I treasure the most and I will never allow it to happen again, ladies pliz never use a phrase that is even close to what your man may regard as disrespect you may regret it for the rest of your life thank you

[@vivavidadela]

If you are doing these you are with the wrong person anyway. If you are with the right one he will be so compatible with you, that it won’t ever get that far. That’s my opinion after 20 years of marriage with a narcissist that drove me to the edge and out of my femininity. Now I’m married to my soulmate and he calms me down. The way he talks to me I never have to raise my voice and defend myself by being mean or disrespectful. He is very emotionally intelligent, knows how to listen and how to calm me down and distract me from anger. We talk like adults. With my ex it felt like I was always arguing with a kid that can’t listen and has no home training.

[@iBleed_RoyLty4368]

He's learned how to communicate and in turn, you have as well. That's how a team supposed to be.

[@chizobapeace8159]

You just said what is on my mind.... When you are with the right person everything flow....

[@davidahamefule7831]

I really love this sister. You mirror into the hearts of men, and you surely do understand better.

[@meanhe8702]

My husband of nearly 30 years and I enjoy a very good marriage in which humor is very important, I was just curious what would happened, so I walked into his office (at home) and yelled at him that he was pathetic and he wasn’t a man (all things I have never said to him ever) he just got a funny look on his face and asked if I wanted to see proof!!! I just burst out in uncontrollable laughter! I love that guy! 😂😂😂

[@Ma1nguy]

I've seen a woman call her husband a liar when he was telling me about story, whether or not he exaggerated or embellished the details, I was mortified when she did that and I lost my respect for her. Maybe that's why I remained single because I'm not going to deal with drama, don't have to and not going to.

[@stanleyhillary]

Many thanks to you, Vivienne. You're a real woman! Keep doing this.

[@DeanRegy]

Finally! A channel that gives advice to women about dating. Good job!

[@katrinam5610]

Thrilled for the new video! ❤ also, love my new Teddy Blake purse. Thank you for the recommendation!

[@mwilajoseph6703]

I am a man: keep doing what you are doing. God bless you and give you more wisdom.

[@Haya_0707]

Thank you for the reminders, dear. Your contents are always worth watching. Keep doing what you do because people like me need people like you. Bless your heart.

[@DOMIN958]

I hope that many young women listen to this lady, she is so nice and wise.

[@cassandraknight8804]

Sometimes they are just not good enough…..and they should know. Do not allow a man to get away with disrespect, and they should definitely be held accountable for extreme aggression… who else will hold them accountable for aggressive behaviour, certainly not themselves…. NO -’live on your feet don’t die on your knees.

[@danilaroche1156]

Aggressive behavior or abuse is different. You have to leave.

[@criv_clothing]

I’ve been consciously revamping the way and manner I speak and react towards men….. then your video pops. Thank you so much for this video Ma’am.

[@Somegirl3602]

Well thank you for teaching me how to behave better and do better, I needed this.

[@hwh5045]

Thank you lady of Elegance...I need to be reminded...I just got married n I already had our first arguments n I did disrespect my husbsnd which I regret everytime but he is still forgiving...so I have a chance to rectify my bad tongue hurting his feelings...I repented...Hallelujah. ..Amen

[@brightaduokyere8273]

What an intelligent woman you are.....Your wisdom and knowledge in the simplistic manner of your presentation on the chosen topic exposes your true nature as a woman of value. You are a treasured ornament who must be cherished by anyone who watches or listen to you. God bless you, sister.

[@stfdituaful]

The most brilliant, and well researched KZbin presentation on men done by a smart and brilliant woman. Flawless presentation, I have no other option than to subscribe despite this channel is dedicated to women. Well done. Great job.

[@sulusu4812]

🌷 when you said common sense & empathy everything else fell in line. If someone is that bad you probably shouldn't be with them. But otherwise, it's just humane to be watchful over our words (& humane for us as well). Besides, when something is amiss or needs to be worked out these phrases you mentioned wouldn't work anyway of course. Thank you so much.

[@thabilebuthelezi]

God knows my man is the most wicked and evil man I've ever met.But i never say those words to him but i know sometimes i can talk back even though i watch my words.But thank you dear for this video it add on my knowledge❤

[@ufuomaejenake7222]

Definitely needed to see this. That emptiness you talked about is me at the moment, i pray for God to see me and help me 😢 thank you for sharing

[@victoryjackson7625]

Thank you coach Vivienne for another wonderful video. You look really stunning 🥰 much love from me to you from Nigeria 🇳🇬 stay safe.

[@SMKajee]

You are indeed a woman of elegance. It's so wow to come across a great educational video here that is so amazing and created by a beautiful elegant black woman, "no offense." I admire how you speak, explain, and present yourself. Well done, ma'am.❤ I always tell this to people, "Be careful with your words because once they're out there, there's absolutely nothing you can do to take them back." Respect is earned and should be to anyone. God bless every one of you reading this right now. ❤😂🎉