In The Bunker | Chapo Trap House | Episode 536

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It’s a jumbo sized Chapo today, starting with a return of our smash hit segment “Animal Facts” to start off with 20 min of levity and speculation on which of Nature’s magnificent creatures are conduits to the spiritual and/or extraterrestrial world. Then, after one of Will’s maybe sweatiest ever transitions, we move on to discussing the tragic Miami condo collapse and the narrowing aperture of improvement in American life. Finally, we read from two accounts of the last days of the Trump Administration, confirming a lot of what we suspected, and adding a few more juicy details of what Trump, Rudy and the gang were actually up to on Jan. 6. Also there’s a little bonus segment on “Woke Capitalism” and the future of “Trumpism” as a political project at the end.
#chapotraphouse #chapo

[@THX11458]

I love Matt's hilarious description of the octopus life cycle - "They just float around a few months and then explode."

[@lizzyfrizzle8986]

I wish there were whole episodes just about animals

[@norbertdrage]

FYI, we do use koalas here in Australia to throw off cops at crime scenes~ （笑）

[@adameanglin]

Matt! the saluki is the mascot of Southern Illinois University, midwest what what!

[@oolacilesbotnet6564]

Felix loves animals so much. It's positively adorable

[@subtleusername5475]

I wanna watch all of Felix's favorite animal videos, there was something really wholesome about him describing how much he likes the one with the monkey hugging the ranger

[@lukemadrid5711]

Felix has a really big heart

[@AkiraIsMissing]

This is the first time I've seen you comment something other than vaush

[@oolacilesbotnet6564]

@@AkiraIsMissing Vaush blows is why

[@zzmoonz]

Wait a based comment from the vaush maupin dude?!?!

[@5508Vanderdekken]

25:58 "the spun sugar and beetroot that the fucking dozers used in (the?) fraggle rock" idk where Matt gets these things, but this is one of the best parts of Chapo imo lol. Just the twisted alchemy of 2 incoherently separate universes - idk even how to describe it

[@freealter]

Yeah literally what is that a reference too he’s a genius.

[@ChrisGnosis]

17 minutes in and I'm starting to think that the animal facts aren't a bit or a cold open

[@nicolev2028]

Felix will be alone forever until he stops with having an Ann Coulter/Borzoi type.

[@declanmcnamara2223]

folks! steiners attack, oh its so beautiful, its gonna push the red army back! and then, we'll push the western allies into the sea! we have a tank, oh its beautiful, so big. theyre calling it the K I N G T I G E R. its gonna win the war! and we love whats happening.

[@gregoryborton6598]

This is the best I have even seen a person replicate trump talk in writing. Bravo.

[@berdyderg900]

It's happening more and more folks

[@Noisemaker50]

"Mr. Trump was impressed by your report. He's decided to appoint you press secretary for the White House." "I'd have preferred that he had me shot"

[@jonathannathan1754]

I could listen to Will and Felix talk about how cool animals are for hours.

[@treeguyfly]

Salukis are basically greyhounds with tassels

[@BosnianBilly]

48:32 a profound silence has entered the chat

[@FirstnameLastname-kn5sw]

Will "To Power" Menaker with the sickest segues this side of the Mississippi.

[@OrangeStrayCat]

These are some odd ideas about cats. Classic thinking on animal domestication (which can't be proven for obvious reasons, but still) holds that cats are the only animal that self domesticated by moving into human settlements slowly on their own, and that wolves/dogs did not. Also if Will means that cats have no "juvenile stage" by that there's no stage between kitten and cat, I don't know what that would have to do with domestication since it's the baby stage where you take an animal to domesticate, and cats pretty much do have a stage in between the two where they grow rapidly and get really skinny (and seem to look for human bonding much more than adult cats if my experience with cats at a shelter is any indication). Cats were extremely useful to humans as pest control since rodents have been the scourge of humanity since they created agriculture, and cats will only eat meat, meaning you can have them running around your fields or grain stores without worrying about them eating your food, even if we don't use them for that much in the modern age. As for whether Marty would eat Will if he was bigger than he is...well, I wouldn't fancy Will's chances. Thank you for listening to my cat facts Ted Talk.

[@jinzok]

hasan i know you are reading this, stop stealing their ideas

[@berdyderg900]

Hasan I know you are reading this, stop being a lib

[@chazblank2717]

I just saw a biography of the woman who wrote Marry Poppins, she moved from Australia to Ireland at 18 and lied about where she was from for basically the rest of her life.

[@semiclassical7620]

Arguably it already came to Minneapolis: the collapse of the I-35W bridge in 2007.

[@jamesblackmon7235]

and now Ronny Jackson is a member of congress. Incredible!

[@BenjaminGlatt]

Felix was dating Vicar Amelia.

[@bob5476]

Couldn’t agree more with Felix at 15:30

[@Oxbloodmage]

What's the song at the end

[@clayman518]

Shoutout to Chris Wade for sampling A New Kind of Water by This Heat in this video lol perfect

[@gOaTcrackalac88]

What kind of dog do you think i am is a loaded question

[@IndirectCogs]

There are smaller wild cats, you guys.

[@jvladcliff4083]

There probably is a cost estimator on human life, a closely guarded secret, but I imagine the problem is that it's very cheap

[@SkywalkerBatPrime]

The official number the government puts out is 10 million. Bet the number they really use is much lower

[@rjmcco]

Courts put a value on human life all the time in awarding damages to the heirs of people who died "wrongfully" Wonder what Kaitlin Jenner's auto insurer paid the family of the poor young woman he killed in that accident.

[@ChangedMyNameFinally69]

@@rjmcco Just because she's an asshole doesn't mean you should misgender her

[@rjmcco]

@@ChangedMyNameFinally69one that could have been a typo.I don't recall intending anything but pointing out that judges, lawyers and insurance CV companies put a monetary value on human life every day. Two; she was Bruce Jenner when she killed that young woman so she was a he during that time. And three: who elected you to be the pronoun police anyway?

[@ChangedMyNameFinally69]

@@rjmcco 1. Understandable 2. Most trans people don't like being deadnamed even if you're referring to them in the past 3. Most trans people would say the same thing. This isn't an original idea I came up with

[@factanonverba7547]

What is the German techno rap song at the end? It's cut here on KZbin, but it's present in Sound Cloud version of this show.

[@brandonborgerding182]

never gonna give you up

[@AdmiralBobbery123]

p sure it’s a remix of PSYs Gentlemen but with lyrics from Hitlers speech in that one movie, I’m sure you could google and find a like 2013 KZbin vid of it lol

[@JJ44595]

@@AdmiralBobbery123 i havent heard it but is it this? kzbin.info/www/bejne/m6jRqYR4hqt9hLM

[@factanonverba7547]

@@AdmiralBobbery123 omg you were right. I can't get this outta my head now

[@factanonverba7547]

@@JJ44595 right to the money

[@charles7888]

I think Trump could take the Speaker job, but have the responsibilities transferred to someone like the house majority leader, the speakership in other countries is often mostly symbolic. He could do a reverse version of LBJ's attempt to transfer senate majority leader powers to VP

[@debrasue2793]

was holding out for a climate k-hole at the end why am i still trapped in my body

[@garylarocca6901]

Hilarious shit.... Thanks

[@vipermad358]

Spokane is not the PNW. It is on the east side of the Cascades. It always gets hot there in the Summer. The big news is the weather mostly in Vancouver, Seattle and Portland, the west side of the Cascades. Because it does not usually get hot here.

[@greasergreg785]

Get this lame geography elitism out of here. It is definitely the Pacific Northwest.

[@carlblix7794]

For anyone who knows too much about animals to not be frustrated by the intro segment, the regular Chapo episode starts at 22:30

[@jeffreykamberos7524]

I just dislike animals. Enough to kill and eat them...

[@carlblix7794]

@@jeffreykamberos7524 What a cool and badass guy you must be.

[@jeffreykamberos7524]

@@carlblix7794 The 007 of the barnyard.

[@jeffreykamberos7524]

@@carlblix7794 I have the strength of 10 men and am cool as a cucumber. To all the gals out there: note the cucumber...

[@Mannydamon]

I hunt and fish, while listening to Chapo Trap House.

[@SUPERBURLBOYROY]

P O O P

[@SUPERBURLBOYROY]

Araggino ?

[@telophasemusic]

P I S S

[@SUPERBURLBOYROY]

D I N G L E B E R R I E S

[@charleslecki3609]

Andrew looks like Wonder Whaft logo wide toothy mouth.

[@TheTurkey79]

The spiders and snakes and shit here are pretty easy to steer clear of. You guys have grizzly bears! Those fuckers will chase you & rip yr face off!! :0

[@Detson404]

Sure, but a grizzly isn’t going to be waiting under my toilet lid lol.

[@TheWanderingPariah]

@@Detson404 hey.. dont be so sure

[@timothybell5698]

"It does not matter, at all. Just believe it." Orwell warned me this kind of totalitarianism would come posing as socialism.

[@berdyderg900]

Literally animal barn smh

[@bigbrother787]

We engage in that "Just believe it" behavior all the time. Just believe the free market will work it out Just believe the police are telling the truth Just believe God will save you Just believe Trump will make America great Just believe Biden will build back better We place our faith in God, institutions and money. I don't believe this ability to 'have faith' is a weakness, I see it as a strength. The strength to defy seemingly impossible odds

[@freakyzed8467]

All these animal facts you find online. I miss when the internet was just for porn

[@ProvisionalPatrioticAlliance]

It can be if you wish it for yourself.... it basically is for me.

[@mcmasters1484]

Is amber gonna be on the show again? Hopefully she didn’t allegedly do something awful like other former co host

[@berdyderg900]

She is finishing a book and wanted time off I believe

[@berdyderg900]

Also grooming minors

[@ryanjarvis9414]

What happened with this co-host

[@waltergrace565]

@@ryanjarvis9414 he loves them highschool girls, man