FELLOW TRAVELERS EP2 REACTION - I cannot COPE with this show 😭🏳️‍🌈

[@Gloren50]

I'm a gay man in my mid-70s. This series is re-creating some serious PTSD for me. When I was a teenager, homosexuality was illegal, I was a criminal and could have been persecuted, prosecuted, and imprisoned for as long as 10 years and 'sterilized'. The political characters in the series were real, historical figures--McCarthy and Roy Cohn, for example. Cohn was a closeted monster who persecuted gay people, but who himself died of AIDS in the 1980s. Things didn't improve until the mid-1970s, but when AIDS hit, it was a horrendous set back. I survived the persecution, AIDS and have been with my husband for 28 years now--something when I was young I couldn't have imagined would ever be possible. -

[@toms5996]

One aspect of this series and in broader terms should be talked about - is how Cohn, Hoover and so many other powerful homophobes including Hitler's right hand man were gay themselves. There is a story there which I'm pretty sure has been analysed somewhere but I haven't found anything on this to this day.

[@toms5996]

Thank you for sharing your story and so happy that you've found happiness.

[@picklesmgee9617]

@@Imetwurld_ He was gay. It’s fact. Look it up.

[@nicolawhitham6964]

That's amazing. So glad you got through all that xx

[@lailapastor4233]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@DIFlaversham]

17:31 I felt like Hawk was telling Tim his true feelings through dictating the letter to him.

[@AmanCreatesArt]

When Hawk is dictating the letter, he is clearly speaking his own feelings for Tim… 🥺

[@desiatovaalex]

"I'm home now" line wrecked me. such a beautiful show but so heartbreaking

[@JackieRossLavender]

Ughhhh it gives me such a lump in my throat. So meaning and poignant.

[@Larry.cupcaks]

If this series does not win several awards, I will be so disappointed and mad....

[@preechavohariwatt6991]

4:10 I totally agreed with you about Jonathan Bailey. He deserved to win an award for this movie.

[@edabillano106]

If I can use of your words during this reaction, I would have to say "ignorant". As mentioned, there is a gay history that has been forgotten with today's community. Today's LGBTQIA+ has yesterday's gay men & women plowing the way for us to be free. But, the stories & histories have to be told, heard, and seen. I'll appreciate your possible future video looking at the different years and how the community went through it. I came out in the late 70's and grew up during difficult 80's & 90's. Thanks again.

[@DIFlaversham]

I think in the book Hawk was in his early 30’s and Tim was in his mid 20’s. Which would put Hawk in his mid to late 60’s and Tim in his late 50’s to early 60’s in 1986. I think that makes sense - Hawk’s daughter looks like she could be in late 20’s. The book doesn’t cover the 1960-1980’s, it skips to 1991 at the end. Tim and Hawk cut ties at the end of the 50’s and never speak again. The show changed that, which I love!

[@Phie_Mc]

Also, the tennis trophy was dated 1936, so it stands to reason that if he was in high school 15 to 20 years ago, he’s likely in his mid 30s.

[@i.t.t.]

Agreed. I was also a bit unclear about the age difference at first but Skippy is a recent uni graduate so a twink really. Hawk is established already. Seeing all the talk a few months back about how people looked older in previous generations, I had to wonder if they did this on purpose. I just don't find the makeup very convincing for when they're older is all.

[@AmyC531]

I really appreciate your more mature reaction and how seriously you take the realities of queer life in these eras, compared to some other react videos I've seen.

[@JackieRossLavender]

Thank you, Amy. I have found myself being quite affected by it. It’s lit a fire in me to research and tell these stories as this part of queer history is so under represented and it’s so important.

[@giuliadenobili5334]

20:05 I feel people underestimate the importance of the relationship between Sen Smith and Hawk. Hawk is in politics and he keeps saying he believes Sen Smith is the only decent and honest man in DC. Hawk really loves him and sees him like a father. I think Hawk is in politics because he hopes to change things and he believe the only way is making sure a good guy gets to the top so he’s there supporting Smith. But at the same time, by being at his side he’s also a liability: if he gets caught for being gay it will expose Smith as well. So part of him being super careful about everything is to keep Smith safe. And in this conversation I think he’s expressing his fears of being used against the Senator.

[@RichardSteuland]

This really hit me hard. I remember what things were like back then. I got to live thru and be involved . Minneapolis has its own colorful, painful and epic history.

[@incubus22on]

Love your show! Your empathy is heartfelt. Having been born in 1953 in a small university town in Iowa, I lived a lot of what you are seeing, but on a smaller scale. I started talking to spiritual leaders trying to understand my feelings and ended up with the Methodist church and their support system for struggling gays. They assigned me to a 25 year old sponsor to talk with and it really helped. I went to a gay dance held in a church basement and it got raided by the police. That threw me back into the closet for another 10 years. I married and was happy with a women who knew I had feelings and attraction to men. I was faithful to her until it no longer worked for us. Then my father died and I said fuck it, I need to live my life and moved away from family to a larger city .Since then I have been living as a gay man. Lucky for Me I found a decent man and had 25 years with him. Married for 10. He passed away from cancer 2 years ago and I count myself fortunate to have had that. ANyway, yes it was a life of living in fear, but what doesn't kill us makes us stronger lol. The mental stress forces one to live for ourself eventually and even then it's difficult sometimes. At 70 I am wondering if I have 1 more relationship in me or if I should count my blessings at what I did accomplish. I have a lot of love to give and if anything, I have the strength of living thru harder times to fall back on Keep doing your show, you have a great personality for it. Hugs

[@Larry.cupcaks]

Maybe this has nothing to do with the series. But since you mentioned how hard it was for them to hide their identity and sexual orientation, or those parties behind closed doors, or those interrogations... I must say that in my country, Iran, and in the 21st century, the situation is still the same. People cannot go wherever they like, wear whatever clothes they like, walk down the street with whoever they like... They are found in the streets and alleys and they are arrested for no reason. And they cannot even protest or defend their rights. My people live in a big prison in Iran.

[@JackieRossLavender]

I’m so, so sorry. I can’t imagine what that must be like for you. One day I hope you are extended the same freedoms we have here in the west. ❤️

[@asilhouette5968]

you described it perfectly.. the terror in this series feels very familiar, very tangible

[@RichardSteuland]

Michele Bachman , Minnesota congresswoman introduced several pieces of legislation to pass Laws that defined marriage as between aman and woman. Then this video of Marcus surfaced. He every trait just screams Queer. It’s rumored that she got serviced by her campaign manager.

[@oldemanA]

Believe it or not, Matt is 11 years older that Jonathan. If you remember that "Hawk" was in WWII, , & that "Tim has just graduated from Uni. "Tim" would be approx. 22-23, with "Hawk" being 8-10 years older.. I really appreciate you, & several other Brits, doing reactions to (both) RWRB & this show. I've not found any Americans do so. There is a lot of info on the "McCarthy Era" as it's call here (in the US) on Wikipedia.

[@jasonstamp10]

this show is incredible and I really hop it sustains this level of quality through to the end. When I first heard about it had my interest, as I'm a fan of both Matt Bomer and Jonathan Bailey and always looking for good new gay shows, but it's gone beyond my expectations. The psychological damage this did to people even if they weren't one of the ones that got caught; the amount of lives it ruined, is so incredibly devastating and heartbreaking. They had to become experts at assessing the safety of the situations they were in and being able to read other people and switch how they talked and behaved just to try and survive. It's a heavy burden to carry and causes trauma within. I knew a bit about this time period and these events before this and I'm so glad they are telling this story so that more people learn about this time in history. We've had a lot told about the 1980s and 90s and the AIDS crisis but less about this. I remember I watched a documentary in 2017 called The Lavender Scare that was about these events and it interviewed people who lived through this. I should maybe see if I can find it and watch it again. I'm sure it might have some renewed interest now because of this show.

[@giuliadenobili5334]

21:21 but at the same time he grew up with her and cares about her deeply. He wouldn’t have been able to marry just anyone, he picked Lucy because he had feelings for her and she had always been family to him.

[@RichardSteuland]

Fargo , North Dakota 1980. I had few options after high school. Dad suggested Military . They asked you if you had or ever had homosexual sex and did you think you might act on those tendencies. I remember hearing an older man telling about his prison sentence because he was caught by undercover cop. So yes they did entrap and prosecute in Minnesota at one time. Even today religious right is trying to bring about laws to return to those repressive days. North Dakota’s , Don’t say Gay law is one example.

[@wolfpupinla]

In the novel, i beleve Hawk is 66 at the beginning, 1991. If that tracks to the show, he's 61 in the opening partY scene. I'll double check and update if necessary. I believe Tim has just graduated college, which would make him 21-22 and Hawk (born in 1925) 27 in the first flashback in 1952.

[@juliofont230]

Pay heed to this wonderful sad and truthful story. Those of you that did not experience the 70s and specially the carnage of the 80s AIDS crisis which, was totally ignored by the government and celebrated by the religious right be grateful and wary. The tragic policies of the 50s destroyed many lives,; while some things have changed we’re on the verge of going back to those same circumstances. In Washington, the attitudes of the 50s have not changed, only the name of the villains are different. Recently, I was highly offended by the younger queer generation derogatorily referring to us who did experience those days as Boomers. Know that Boomers are the ones who made today’s freedoms a reality and show some respect. Fellow Travelers is very emotional, true, and loving cautionary tale. Take heed. I will have to experience this beautifully written and executed film again after I process the strong emotions it elicited.

[@JackieRossLavender]

Please know there are many of us go are grateful to the older generation of queers who paved the way for us. Your stories will not go unnoticed. ❤️

[@cazb5777]

I just want to say that your reviews are absolutely the best!!! I adore this series so much so far and as soon as the episode ends I can not wait to see your review of the episode. I love the way that you notice every detail. I also agree that the quality of the series is phenomenal!

[@susanhawkins2979]

When I was in High school, we had one lesbian and two gay teachers and letters had to be sent home letting the parents know they were that way so the parents could chose to pull their kids from their classes. I had Mr Marshall for a social study course, and I will always be grateful for his perspective. That was the 90’s and so glad my parents didn’t pull me from his class!!

[@JohnFallot]

The intro was me after the first episode 😭 The “kids who die” poem at the end of this episode though, it cemented for me why continuing to watch the show is important.

[@kencairns532]

Each video of yours that I watch, I dig you more and more. I love your insight, intelligence, empathy, and your picking up on tiny details that don't slip by you. I learned a lot about you with that warm interview you did with Courtney-Jai. So impressed with you and your channel! Thank you. 🫶 Best, Ken. ❤️☮️🏳️‍🌈

[@AlexSanchez-jv4ib]

I was still too young to have any real memories of what life was like in the 80’s, but this show has brought back too many memories of my time in the military at the height of DADT (Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell)… The constant fear and secrecy of having to keep your life a secret and even when something bad happens to you, your leadership telling you that they’d like to help you, but they can’t because admitting what has happened to you would start the process of getting you discharged from the military.

[@mchparity]

12:30 in 52, I'd assume Hawk as a veteran is in his early 30s (could be late 20s). Tim has volunteered for the NY campaing after uni, so he's about 22-24 because McCarthy just won. Lucy looks young, and with a Grant Tour in Europe, she's early 20s? Mary cleary has been Hawks secretary for a while, I'd assume she's around 25.

[@1obsessionafteranother794]

I’ve shed tears each episode so far (up to ep3). As predicted I am not ok

[@mikelkirby2791]

I agree with your opening comments regarding gay history finally being done correctly. I lived through the timeline of this series and it is rather accurately portrayed. And it was not some compilation of "campy characters" further perpetuating the effeminate side of the queer spectrum..

[@AmanCreatesArt]

So much great foreshadowing and callbacks just between the first two episodes. In this episode, Hawk shares his dream of being stationed overseas so he can live as his true self. In episode one, the party in 1986 is because he is being stationed overseas, but he's moving there with is wife and family. In 1952, Tim says he'll take that secret to his grave. And in 1986, he is on his way there... In 1986, when Hawk comes to Tim's apartment the "That's not what I'm afraid of," exchange is repeated by now reversed and in the context of AIDS rather than the EO from when he wants to come up to Tim's apartment at the end of episode 1.

[@JamieEM83]

I know it's not going to be a happy ending for Tim and Hawk but I'm in denial and I'm hoping they at least get some closure.

[@MyInitialsAreCBD]

If you want something to read about this time frame, that isn't the novel this series is based on, I recommend finding a copy of "The Deviant's War: The Homosexual vs. The United States of America" by Eric Cervini.

[@ribalded]

Beautiful reaction to a beautiful show! Glad I found your channel. One thing that may be helpful regarding their ages throughout: the young girl you’ve seen in Hawk’s 80’s scenes is his granddaughter, not his daughter. Matt Bomer’s gorgeous face probably made it difficult for the makeup dept to truly age him up lol but I believe he’s meant to be toward the end of his career/in his early 60s.

[@Pro-Deo]

You said it's hard for you to watch this episode having not experienced it and can't imagine it for those that were there at this time. That's a good statement. Now bring into the mix this on the world wide level. At that time, before that time since the beginning of mankind and now. Imagine all those experiences. Thanks to the internet it's taken off to be pretty much post revolutionary.

[@bluefriend62]

Thank you for your brilliant reactions to this.

[@ryanburks4607]

12:12 it’s been awhile since I read the book (2012?) but the story takes place during the Red/Lavender Scare in the 1950s - height of McCarthyism - the sequences in the future take place in the 70s just before the AIDS crisis.

[@ryanburks4607]

Hawk is 30ish, Tim is in his 20s I think

[@giuliadenobili5334]

I think his father walked in on Hawk and his boyfriend and forced him to leave and join the army and the boyfriend followed him into war and died and Hawk never forgave himself and that’s the trauma the cause him to believe he can never get close to anyone or be himself ever again

[@giuliadenobili5334]

If I were Caroline and I had already the commission on me I would have been the one telling Mary to burn me. I would have known I was done, I had to leave and disappear anyway, I might at least save the woman I loved

[@toms5996]

This series gives something to think about on how things were in the past decades. It's so sad though... (And now starting to watch Ep. 3)

[@betsymayo5822]

I'm a queer woman in my 40s and this show slayed me... I'd forgotten the extremity of the AIDS crisis... it leveled me to remember all of the people we lost because the government didn't make it a priority... Beyond Measure.

[@GoddessOfWhatnot]

I’m looking forward to anything you do regarding this time period - most queer history focuses on either Stonewall and after, not before 🏳️‍🌈

[@beatricethomas7802]

Thank you for reviewing this series.. This was/is a sad time in US history. Joe McCarthy was a horrible man and Roy Cohn was disgusting, (he is Trump's Roy Cohn). Cohn and McCarthy were gay so it makes it even worse. Sen. Smith is played by Linus Roche who is gay in real life . He also played a gay man, older version of Harry Styles character, Tom Burgess, in "My Policeman" which came out last year on Prime. Which was also a book. The director, Michael Grandage, insisted on an all queer cast. He cast Harry first and built the rest around him. It's also based on a real life person. Beautiful love story but also sad. Yes, it still happens today especially in the music/entertainment industry. There are horrific contracts, use of NDAS to hide abuse and homophobic people throughout the industry the force artists into the "glass closet". Its easy to find if you are looking for it. Its really sad. I hope you have a chance to see this film.

[@JackieRossLavender]

I have the book but haven’t read it yet or watched the film. Over on Patreon we’re going to be doing monthly movie reacts (as they’re quite the hefty edit) so it’ll definitely be one on the list!

[@takata98]

Whilst Linus Roache has an impressive and diverse catalogue of work in his career to date, which indeed includes several gay characters. I am puzzled why you state he is gay? He has been and still is married to Rosalind Bennett since 2002. His work in the UK and the US has included more straight roles than gay. One of his first roles missing from your list how ever is Rev Greg Pilkington in "Priest" 1994, cast alongside Robert Carlisle who is also straight and married since 1997. 🤔

[@dianefurlong2911]

This was a tough one. I watched episode 3 earlier today.

[@zanechi]

The kids at the beginning were his grandkids, so you can assume how old he was.

[@adrianosoares6124]

that "yes" broke me beyond repair!!!!

[@olliemorgan9735]

Jackie, well done. I continue to love yourcommentary.

[@painpewb357]

I don't write English very well, but I can share my experience. This episode causes me so many emotions, because something like this is happening in my homeland right now. I was born and raised in Russia. In a rather conservative and religious family. And ever since I was a child, I've heard about how terrible and disgusting it is to have a gay son or daughter. That if such a thing had happened, they would not have been able to survive it. And they are constantly being lectured, although they themselves have many secrets. And these secrets have been destroying my family for generations. And our government has been doing everything for more than twenty years to make society hate LGBT people. It incites fear and hatred, arrests people, releases and justifies murderers who kill LGBT people. And it saddens me to realize that this is not because most people are bad, but because a bunch of rich oligarchs and the government are consolidating their power so much. Because there are also very good people here who accept you for who you are.

[@thaladyloves]

Does anyone think the reason Hawk was considering apologizing to his father for the inheritance was to be able to leave with Tim? Because at first he didn’t want to go, then after being with Tim changed his mind. And he tells his mother he’s found someone, but he’s defeated like he lost hope. Then goes to Tim. 😢❤ Thoughts???

[@sherrimast8525]

After the executive order was put in place to root out "deviants" in the government, Hawk was looking to make a plan to get out which meant he needed money to make that move. He first questioned about his uncle and found out that he was insolvent so he decided to make some sort of amends to his father to get an inheritance. But, yes it was all about running and taking Skip with him. I did find it significant that he told his mom about Tim (which to me was one of the ways he admits loving Tim) and that he felt Tim was his home (another admission of love) When you think about someone being your home that comes from a deep feeling of trust, feeling accepted and loved unconditionally.

[@Phie_Mc]

If you're interested in more TV shows that have storylines concerning the Lavender Scare (or just love alternate history sci-fi) For All Mankind is amazing. Also, the person who plays McCarthy in Fellow Travelers played Deke Slaton, the head of the astronaut program at NASA. It's an ensemble cast, so it doesn't always focus on the gay characters but I think it was very well done.

[@jimmywhite3922]

I just finished episodes 1 and 2... I am wrecked!!...Hope to have more to say once I take it all in...😢

[@JackieRossLavender]

It’s a lot, right? I am glad it’s being released weekly because I need the break between episodes.

[@dianefurlong2911]

I’m finally settled for the evening and ready to watch.

[@michael7770]

One more episode to go, and I fear it will be devastating😪

[@kikimo57]

as an elderly gay man this is very hard to watch... old wounds open and you cry

[@francelinequintal6066]

It is so fun to watch you love your reactions

[@Aysgarth1]

The young child was his granddaughter, not his daughter.His daughter appears at the beginning, at the party.

[@JackieRossLavender]

Okay that makes much more sense

[@harryarmstrong2930]

The Wolfenden report was happening in the same era in the uk and hardly anyone knows or does content about it. Theres been two films and both keep getting swept under the rug until a new anniversary for it comes along. Its a key moment in queer history in the uk. If you dont know about it research it, like I said there's been two films, both done by the bbc.

[@eduardaucamp9272]

Regretfully Netflix did not aquire this series.

[@JackieRossLavender]

Why regretfully? I think paramount have made an outstanding show.

[@lindastewarts1823]

Tim early 20 hawk 30ish.

[@raphael18ify]

Funny, the two young men at the gay bar who want to have Hawk as a part of group sex. I cannot seem to find their names on the credit role nor on Imbd. Would you have any idea who they are or how I might find another source. Thanks

[@roger25375]

Saw your White Pass Hoodie, we did that again this past August

[@JackieRossLavender]

It’s actually my boyfriend’s hoodie. He works away and it’s the fondest memories of our time together in Alaska. I miss it every day!

[@mayaroberts1902]

Now imagine having to deal with racism, sexism and homophobia at the same time? Welcome to America, this is a ongoing issue in this country, especially today. This country has basically regressed almost back to this hate filled stupidity 🙄.

[@tedclimie502]

It still happens now

[@emili2188]

You have to watch the movie Milk!!!

[@kembalibersatuchannel3249]

Im sorry, i just wonder.. it’s tim sick and got hiv? .. I actually can relate how struggle they are to keep secret of homo relationship.. 😢😢 Poor tim

[@tedclimie502]

Stories I could tell...

[@toms5996]

Please do - if you want to, of course. I'm 40+ and my experiences living the Nordics have been quite positive. What comes to the themes of the series - people should remember that antiretrovirals came to market as late as 1997 and prep only recently (if we talk about HIV). Also the right to marry came to most developed countries only in the past 15 years. So quite many things are still relatively recent.

[@nevadat3996]

Episode 3 when 😢

[@JackieRossLavender]

Give a boy a chance to film the reaction 😂

[@nevadat3996]

@@JackieRossLavenderOkay, thank you. I love your reactions

[@paulrobertson7650]

I couldnt watch this at all..i did watch about 20mins of the one...to painful...

[@JackieRossLavender]

Seems a lot of people are feeling this and I totally get it

[@emili2188]

Have you seen Milk?

[@dianefurlong2911]

Rewatching 4/4/24

[@lailapastor4233]

I knowww