Jeff Goldblum Tells Funny Jurassic Park Story

[@pike399]

"Hey how about my character lives, and your one dies?" *gets killed on a toilet*

[@canislunaticus]

Karma

[@nebojsasavic6262]

@@canislunaticus is a bitch!

[@morammofilmsph1540]

@Allan from Paris I'm pretty sure the lawyer did move after the rex wrecked the hut. He was wiping his face and trying to gesture the rex to go away.

[@enderfox1699]

@Allan from Paris well the lawyer was shaking bless him, and I think the T-rex can tell a h8man moving his hands from his head as food

[@KCromie]

@Allan from Paris As others have pointed out, he was frantically wiping his face in panic, but the amount of movement compared to Alan/Lex (not to mention Lex's additional screaming) as the T-Rex was taking its last step towards them is really similar (if not more) and thus logically you're right to question and find that peculiar.

[@Trampadoo]

Can't blame the actor. He probably read the book and knew that the lawyer is a badass character and actually survives.

[@Anthony-df4bs]

Trampadoo true. first time i read the book, i couldn't believe the difference between the movie lawyer and the book lawyer.

[@Theshark15z]

Trampadoo He survives the park but later dies from disease he contracted.

[@Anthony-df4bs]

Theshark15z Ian Malcom?

[@Theshark15z]

Anthony Ricci No the lawyer. In the book, the Lawyer was the brave hero that help eradicate the raptors he survived the ordeal at the island but would later die from severe Gastroenteritis. Dr. Malcom was sort of the coward that ran off, but in the movie characters were changed around. The only character to stay the same is Dennis Nedgry.

[@Anthony-df4bs]

Theshark15z i read the book a few years ago but I thought the lawyer was killed by the baby t-rex?

[@PeyserConlee]

"It's that, it's that, that's, that, that's..." Nobody tells a story like Jeff Goldblum.

[@Kinghenhog39]

Lmfaoo so true! I want all his audiobooks "and then Harry uhh you know, potter uhh uhh finds a way"

[@IronMan-tk8uc]

@@Kinghenhog39 Laughing my ass off here!

[@SpruceCampbell]

Clip is 5% story and 95% Goldblumisms

[@Angus_Gibson]

"Who wants to die?" Sean Bean clears his throat and shifts uncomfortably.

[@kargarok11]

Angus Gibson fuuuuck good comment

[@tonyhall3365]

"When you gotta go you gotta go"

[@claudia1983ful]

What if my character lives and yours dies Jeff:HAHAHAHWARWAR

[@SpruceCampbell]

HAHHAAARRHHHHAAAAAHAAAARRR!!

[@aaronscottmatthews7883]

haha !

[@sce2aux464]

I like the way Jeff Goldblum stays in character as Ian Malcolm in this interview.

[@MrWolfSnack]

+SCE2AUX2 Pretty sure he's always like that, at least through the 90's.

[@cretaceousthehunted9669]

I also like that two.

[@MindstormRecords]

Nope that's just Jeff Goldblum being himself

[@Red7669]

Yeah, that's not his character. That's just him lol. He's awesome.

[@anaussie213]

MrWolfSnack he’s def still like that, hence being cast as pretty much himself in Thor ragnorok.

[@catsadilla324]

"what if my character lives and your character dies?" "that is one big pile of shit"

[@IronMan-tk8uc]

LOL.

[@elykspuz6596]

The guy was obviously preoccupied with if his character could live that he didn't stop to think if he should

[@darthbigred22]

What you call stardom I call the rape of the original story

[@아이린김-q3d]

🤣🤣

[@gloomfiend]

Death.. ehh.. finds a way

[@mrpdmasta]

Pissing myself here, god damn

[@KunLee-wi8br]

condors,condors are on the verge of extinction....

[@Jak3thusn4ke]

Oh come on, Goldblum, you could've fit so many more uhs in that interview

[@Trampadoo]

Good lord, what is so difficult to understand about the fact that Malcom died in the first book and because he became such a popular character in the movie and the movie was such a big success Crichton was pressured into writing a sequel and resurrecting Malcom? The author himself said so! Get it?

[@348tacos7]

Trampadoo Malcolm did not die in the first book. It was implied that he did but actually it was revealed that he survived in the second one. Ok

[@Resimaster]

Yeah and if Jeff hadn't made him so popular in the movie then Crichton would have just said he died of his injuries in the first book.

[@sheldesroches745]

The reason Malcolm was brought back for the second novel had nothing to do with how popular he was in the film. He was brought back because he was Michael Crichton's author avatar; the character who is used to express the author's views on a subject. So Crichton felt he was the most important character to have back. That is what he actually said. Not that he was brought back because of the movie.

[@darthbigred22]

@@sheldesroches745 I agree somewhat but I think Malcolm becoming the main character in the Lost World is because of Goldblum. When the film came out they didn't think us kids were going to want Ian Malcolm toys so all we got was Muldoon, Grant, Nedry, Sattler, and Tim. Wasn't until the second line came out which in kid terms was an eternity that we got Ian. Anyways Goldblum was the only main character to have a career after the movie. Sam Neil didn't do much after that, Neither did Laura Dern, Richard Attenborough was basically retired from acting anyways, both kids went no where. Sam Jackson and Wayne Knight continued on but I wouldn't say their involvement with the film mattered to their careers. But I do agree Malcolm in both books is Crichton's voice...the real "Life finds a way" speech is the biggest fuck you to environmentalists I've ever heard in pop culture and wildly misused in the movie

[@rockerseven]

No one wants their character to die...except for sean bean apparently

[@mynamesdora]

It would be funny if he always hopes before reading a script that his character lives to the end.. I just imagine him as continuously disappointed!

[@TEGRULZ]

Bean lived through 20 years of filming Sharpe though.

[@Imlaor25]

When Jeff Goldblum talks it’s 5% actual information and 95% Goldbluming

[@BlueMaxx86]

The even FUNNIER STORY is that the lawyer in the book lives and is a total badass, Goldblum's character's the one that actually gets eaten by the T-Rex.

[@Mowgli602]

Punk Rock Penguin He doesn't get eaten, he dies of blood loss/internal bleeding

[@MinecraftPlanetChan]

Mowgli i thought he stayed behind and got blown up as they bombed the park?

[@Mowgli602]

When the group is finally leaving the island, one of them (Muldoon I think) asks where Malcolm is and whoever was with him in the end (not sure who) just shakes their head, so I believe he just died

[@quietcrowd]

+Mark What you're talking about is Grant gets on the helicopter and asks Muldoon if Malcolm was all right, but Muldoon shakes his head in response.

[@darthcaedus9130]

Guess you havent read the book since thats not what happened

[@squirrelattackspidy]

Dude that was a HILARIOUS story! OMG, I'm gonna tell that one at any social event!

[@imcallingjapan2178]

Well now, it's hardly appropriate to start hurling generalizations

[@JamesCraigWhoop]

Lawyer comes back for the sequel Lawsuit World

[@marcanta]

But your character lived! And that is because life, uh, finds a way.

[@primepm8861]

And the lawyer actually lived in the book too.

[@KarlBaron]

Gear > Speed > 0.5 Yep, NOW it's Goldblum

[@Skumnation]

Gennaro was a badass in the book, they kind of had him trade places with Ed Regis for the movie which was odd, but the movie still rocked.

[@joekerr7975]

"Life found a way" for Ian Malcolm to live and "The blood sucking lawyer" to die!

[@dankane90]

The lawyer dying was one of the best parts of the movie

[@SniperRed0092]

He's not a bad actor, he just stutters, and talks weird. I love him.

[@fettster279]

Its funny because Gennaro survives in the book and is a badass, and Malcolm "dies".

[@Casarzino]

in some way I actually get his point. Like if Malcolm had died in that scene the dramatic impact would have been brutal because he was such a likable character.

[@trumpsdailytruthsmakelibsc6952]

Brutal yes but the audience may have hated the Movie for cheap shots like that

[@Chrismcredmond]

Gets eaten... and dies Haha As opposed to getting eaten and living!? :P

[@jnoirj3124]

Well, you can get eaten whole, while you're still alive. There are a few animals that do this.

[@wildinthestreets101]

I think ever since that came out, he's been living life like Ian Malcolm lmao. Kind of like Jeff Bridges in his Dude character

[@sergeantbigmac]

wildinthestreets101 Im glad im not the only one who thinks that, because watching his earlier films I cant help but notice how much more 'normal' he is lol.

[@hendrong]

Yeah... No "uh... uh"'s in The Fly.

[@anaussie213]

sergeantbigmac Normal? His first role was as Freak#1 in deathwish (although freak #1 does sound better than rapist murderer like what his character actually was).

[@darthbigred22]

It's what John Wayne, Clint Eastwood, Bruce Willis, and Arnold did most of their careers. Play your strength. Goldblum does eccentric smart guy better than anyone

[@thegoodgeneral]

His suggestion is actually accurate with the book. Lawyer lives, Malcolm dies (but is resurrected for the second book).

[@ThatReallyFunnyThing]

In the epilogue It is strongly implied that Malcolm died. Crichton had non intention of writing a sequel. Jurassic Park, both the novel and the movie, was so popular, fans demanded a sequel. Crichton resurrected Malcolm because he loved the character and Ian was pretty much Crichton.

[@Trampadoo]

+rockndude87 At that time the second book had not been written, genius. Ferrero most likely had read the book and knew that his character lives while Malcom dies.

[@takerdust]

The toilet death scene was more memorable than the entire plot of Jurassic Park 2.

[@Resimaster]

One of the original ideas DID have Malcolm dying and Gennaro surviving. They had several versions of the story to consider.

[@ExplodingViper777]

Jeff Goldblum tells a funny story? I guess you could say this was... Comedy Gold.

[@vincentshellacque6228]

+Billy Russom Comedy Goldblum.

[@regalecusglesne3022]

jeff goldblum is the type of guy that laughs at his own jokes and waits for you to awkwardly laugh as well

[@ekathe85]

He realized the anecdote was not as funny as he thought it would be LOL

[@anaussie213]

If he shits on him at that point it would be a good story, but he realised being filmed he couldn’t do that.

[@omarhaq9635]

“When the Pirates of the Caribbean breaks down the Pirates don’t eat the tourist”

[@cretaceousthehunted9669]

Donald Gennaro: If they’re not convinced I’m not convinced, I’ll shut you down John. John Hammond: In 48 hours, I’ll be accepting your apologies. *Gets eaten on the toilet*

[@Jdabomb93]

Well I'm glad Malcom didn't die. He really became such a likable character to me.

[@Beastudios]

It's amazing how a guy who stutters this much managed to become a successful actor.

[@juliet3350]

Yeah, I know it was commented a year ago, but anyway... In Wired's interview he said, that he in fact does not have a stutter, he does all those sounds on purpose.

[@yergaderga]

Jeff please run for president in 2020

[@DiddyCanFly]

“I shouldn’t tell… oh why not.” 😂

[@xxxCRAZYLOVExxx]

Thanks for the info, i watched it cause i saw u mention it here. btw it's awesome how Jeff Goldblum actually talks like his character in the movie, i thought it was just acting, Steven Spielberg must have had a chat with him and liked his unique way of talking.

[@ElvenRaptor]

I wouldn't minded having Donald live if he was like he was in the book.

[@beerman9473]

"Uh" ~ Jeff Goldblum

[@Cmach91]

Funny thing College Humor did a short actually featuring Ferrero where his character realizes he's in the movie for absolutely no reason but to die LOL

[@PizzaDinosaur]

somebody cut this down to just jeff's "uhhh" and "ah, ah" bits please tia

[@imcallingjapan2178]

I think having the less likable lawyer survive and the funnier genius character who predicted things would go wrong be proved right in a horrible and tragic way would be more emotionally impactful and make the tone of the rest of the film more serious as an "Oh shit, this means anyone can die" moment, since as an audience we all expected the bigger actor and character to live and the less likable one with lesser known actor to die. But the lawyers had their shot and nature selected them for extinction

[@Terryfan]

the problem with this story is that the power to tell it didn't require any discipline he just took the story without responsibility he told over the shoulders of interviewers to accomplish something as fast as he could and before he even knew what he had he padded it he package it he slap it on a plastic lunch box and now he's selling he's selling

[@dingleberryliespewer3177]

underrated comment

[@Kishan_Baijnath]

Astounding.

[@porsche911sbs]

Sean Bean wants to die.

[@marioescalante4401]

If he's not available, Steve Buscemi also wants to die.

[@1upMarioBrosfromytp]

HAL don’t kill me

[@alucard624]

Yeah, I wasn't too thrilled about how they translated the character to the screen. Both Gennaro and Muldoon in the book were well written in the book versus the movie. And they shared a really awesome sequence against some dinosaurs in the book. I just wish Spielberg had filmed the book as it was written in many ways.

[@toyhybirddinosaur_plays9309]

I think he wanted it to be more on the children sig . He wanted to children to view it as how he maybe viewed dinosaurs when he was little.

[@SmokeDog1871]

The script was literally written by Michael Crichton, so the novel's author changed all that shit

[@mrmanpersonguy5812]

Tha... thats chaos theory right there.

[@dinolover932]

I’m really happy that Spielberg didn‘t agree to this idea 😂🙏 Jeff Goldblum/Ian Malcolm = the best ❣️

[@budwhite9591]

After being turned into a fly, and taking a 12 gauge point blank to the head, Jeff should be allowed to survive every movie he is in

[@evilemperordude]

Ferrero probably actually read the book. Though if they were more faithful to the books, Malcolm would be miraculously resurrected with no explanation in Lost World.

[@jedi01sith]

Sam Neil + Jeff Goldblum = Pure movie gold

[@BgB0ycaprice]

Best story ever. He nailed it.

[@robotpanda77]

I know, I'm sure everyone in the audience was rooting for the slimy lawyer guy to live! lol

[@PsyQoBoy]

Chaos Theory: That fact the lawyer suggest Malcolm's character to die changed the film's narrative to him dying on the toilet.

[@Dinodain]

This is made more funny by the fact that the very same actor just stared in a College Humor video as the same lawyer character from Jurassic Park and for the life of himself is trying to explain to the other Jurassic Park characters why he shouldn't die.

[@K66guns0]

Malcom was only in a coma, he comes back in The Lost World.

[@lucaszoppi47]

In 1.25 is on coke and in 0.5 is drunk. You are a great actor mr Goldblum

[@omalleycaboose5937]

In the book the lawyer lived and Malcolm died... Actually in the book the Lawyer wasn't the guy who abandoned the kids and dies that was someone else... in the book, which I am reading now the Lawyer is actually 1 of the best characters.

[@tertiuscarstens7084]

Jeff Goldblum's character (Ian Malcolm) was brilliant! I'm glad he survived. Martin Ferrero's character (Donald Gennaro) begged to be eaten.

[@jaguar4u2012]

Jeff: AMMMMM AMMM AHHH AHHH AMMMM "AND" AMMM AHHH

[@MrsGiovanellaAline]

In the book Malcom dies after the T-rex hurts his leg badlys. And well, the lawyer help saving the kids from a velociraptor and survives... And Oh! Hammond is eaten by Procompsognathus.

[@MrNostalgic4]

And then the lawyer dies on the second book, and Malcom revives.

[@TheBlackLodger]

Mr.Nostalgic Gennaro dies a terrible death that is not being eaten by dinosaurs

[@TheBlackLodger]

Mr.Nostalgic And funny how he died on the toilet in the first movie and died of dysentery in the second book, which, probably also occurred on a toilet.

[@crazy4sian]

I know I don't want to die, now that's chaos.

[@WayWardWonderer]

I seriously hope they keep Dr. Ian Malcolm in Jurassic Park 4! He is too awesome to leave out!

[@fettster279]

The funny thing is in the book that's how it happens, lol. And then Crichton resurrected Malcolm for The Lost World book.

[@SchmittVanDean]

Also Jeff Goldblum is a delight.

[@SpruceCampbell]

0:00-0:26 be like "I remember an actor once uh...eh heh heh heh, I shouldn't uh tell this oh why not there was a in a Jurassic Park...the first Jurassic Park...you know actors want to protect their it's not bad I uh after having told this story on myself it's not bad the uhhackhharwgher"

[@SHarriet]

Ian Malcolm, Goldblum's character, actually does die in the book. It gets retconned in the second book so he can be the main character.

[@TheOne-bv8wi]

Holy crap i am so darn glad that Ian didn't die!

[@StealthMaster86]

To think, The lawyer, Gennaro, survived in the book.

[@Skull10]

Yeah, Martin Ferrero may never have become a star, but he's a great, underutilized actor.

[@HalfEatenMedia]

I’d do anything to die in a Jurassic Park film. 😂 actors and their egos. It’s all about screen time to them. I think Spielberg had a disliking for lawyers of his past. Killing off the lawyer was a bit of a joke.

[@lessermook7608]

Jeff Goldblum, Goldbluming

[@Conservative4]

I think Malcolm dying was in keeping with the spirit of the book and the theme of the story, in the sense that he- as the chaotician, was warning people of the dangers from the get-go. His whole character purpose was to elaborate on the red flags of the premise, and what better way to do that than by dying?

[@vardellsfolly5200]

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Sean Bean the moving talking spoiler!!! Hhahahahahaha!!!!Good one!!!

[@CrazyEnglishman]

It's at the end, Malcolm closes his eyes while smiling and passes away. The characters check and say he's dead. Lost World brought him back XD

[@anaussie213]

More like Jeff’s Charismatic performance brought him back. Which is both why they couldn’t kill him in JP the film and why he was written back in for the sequel.

[@rlinfinity]

@Desenova Malcolm does die in the novel. It says so in the Epilogue. But that bit is retconned for The Lost World as he was the principle character

[@czechpianist]

That blood-sucking lawyer said what?!

[@carl_anderson9315]

Any 5 year old kid to his sibling: Ok, now I'm gonna eat those cookies, and you're gonna stay there and tell if mom comes to the kitchen. Good?

[@niki_mafioso39]

@ 1:23 LMFAO xD

[@theEarlofChip]

Most of us could have told the story in 30 seconds, but that's why Jeff is the master and we're not.

[@dina.j]

i love him!!

[@anderworld]

@Wailot6 he died in the novel, but in the second part crichton takes him back bacause the popularity of the film. read the last chapters of the novel: Grant asks Muldoon if Malcom is still alive, but he says no with the head.

[@glitchhunter09]

You know the irony? In the novel, Gennaro survives and Malcom supposedly dies at the end from an infection in his leg. Though it's revealed Malcom actually survived somehow in the second book and it is revealed in the second book Gennaro died of Dissentary (explosive diarrhea) on a business trip in another country. So either way you slice it, Gennaro and Malcom died at some point in the books.

[@Drachenhannes]

Good call. I think there was a second one he survived in. But i can't seem to recall that one.

[@ssj2matt]

He was probably suggesting it because it's accurate to the book.

[@Scarefan125]

@airborneXZ but in the original novel it is greatly implied his character died. Crichton did the same thing Sir Arthur Conan Doyle did after he killed off Sherlock Holmes in his novel. He brought him back.

[@jsfbr]

As others have already commented, in the original story, the lawyer lives and Ian is left as dead, but with a minor question mark that allowed him to come back in The Lost World.

[@Axel1051]

That’s an interesting theory. I think they did Genarro’s character in the book a grave disservice with his snivelling, weak, capitalist counterpart in the movie but I think if Ian Malcolm was killed by the Rex (in fairness he wasn’t short on courage) it would have some serious impact.

[@HanBOHobbit]

Okay. I have an updated comment. A continuation of the one above that has been voted up 37 times. Malcolm DOES die in the novel. Just because the author decided to bring him back in the second novel due to the "timely intervention by Costa Rican doctors" doesn't make any difference regarding the ending of the ORIGINAL Novel. Michael Crichton WROTE the book, he can do that. He did not intend to write a second book at the time, so Malcolm dies. Leave it at that, please. No more comments about it.

[@davidevans3175]

After hearing the idea, Spielberg decides to change the script. Instead of the bloodsucking lawyer getting killed by accidentally falling into the dinosaur enclosure, Spielberg has him on the shitter, pants around his ankles, outhouse gone, fully exposed, eaten head first by an enraged T-Rex.

[@AshrafAnam]

One thing I really hate about such movies as Jurassic Park is that they would just kill off "unimportant" characters without remorse but anyhow save the "important" ones who are sometimes more likely (or often equally likely) to be killed in that situation than the ones actually killed.

[@dreamyfilmz]

Best actor EVER!!!!!! Lov JP:)

[@991zacky]

Wow, what a Chaos Theory

[@GetToDaChoppa-k5r]

Jeff probably saw sequel dollars on the horizon. Cha ching.

[@sir_john_hammond]

You'll have to excuse Dr. Malcolm...

[@awesomerobby96]

Watch at .5 speed. You wont regret it