Join the conversation on Twitter/Instagram: @jockowillink @echocharles Excerpt from JOCKOPODCAST 215
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@odessagirl4life4 жыл бұрын
“High school is not life” a few of my coworkers missed that memo. I work with a few people who are in their 50s that act like high school never ended.
@Theendman424 жыл бұрын
How so? As in, their attitudes are like they are still in high school, not mature, etc. Or is it, they can't let go of the memories of it, and are still bothered by and caught up in it all?
@odessagirl4life4 жыл бұрын
Theendman they gossip and spread false rumors then play victim when you confront them.
@patrickholt41344 жыл бұрын
My boss (great guy) put one of his high school buddies in a shift leader position. The bully is the biggest brown noser and never has to do his job, with no consequences. Not gonna throw away a 14 year job because of it. He bullys others but not me anymore. A few years ago I finally went off on him and showed my dedication to my job and stood my ground. I get along with the bully now but have to watch him bully others. It's sad. The worst machinest got the job of telling better machinest how to do their job. Uncle Rico syndrome. His day is coming. I'm just gonna sit back and watch the show.
@Anonymous-tk9re4 жыл бұрын
Megan Roy they’re like they were in high school because they weren’t able to reflect. Nothing being their fault, meaning they think they were justified to do whatever thing you’re calling them out on. They know it’s wrong to do, they just don’t care. They think that they’re the exceptions to the rule every time. Their elevated entitlement is congruent with narcissism.
@Theendman424 жыл бұрын
@@odessagirl4life Ah, the immature ones. For one reason or another they don't mature. All the more reason to be humble, and subordinate your ego.
@johncostello29484 жыл бұрын
I was bullied twice in my life. The first was by two much bigger dudes in high school; I always felt that if you are smaller, you have every right to use weapons, so I started carrying a set of brass knucks and pepper spray.... solved that problem. The second time was in my professional life working at a company (the trades) with horrendous bosses. Brass knucks were not an option, so despite the miserable work environment I started working extra long hours at the company and learned every aspect of my trade in 5 years. I then quit, started my own company and went into competition against my former employer and kicked its ass financially.
@jambalaya2013 жыл бұрын
In Germany we say "Geil" which means sth like "Super nice and badass" in a vulgar way. Geil brother, geil.
@N.N013 жыл бұрын
this is gold, man
@johannesn.59883 жыл бұрын
@@jambalaya201 Hahaha der Kommentar hat mich gekillt! Aber geil dass hier auch andere Deutsche sind!
@ianway27253 жыл бұрын
Thats it. I was bullied for a couple of years at my lowest ebb in life and did nothing about it. Its a regret.
@oKApplejack3 жыл бұрын
@@ianway2725 hold onto that regret. It’s what will prevent it from ever happening again.
@@gatherwithsarah It would be cool, but it also would go against his belief in taking care of oneself.
@thelonlypanda14 жыл бұрын
Step 4: ??? Step 5: profit
@hjembrentkent61814 жыл бұрын
People become much more peaceful with a hollow point in the skull - JockO
@User-546314 жыл бұрын
😂
@arisn324 жыл бұрын
That’s funny, I think everyone is stuck in high school mentally. So many people are negative, insecure, and abusive.
@iwcb84134 жыл бұрын
@@smokingcrab2290 true.
@glorykiller9984 жыл бұрын
@Super Chad Well no shit, your name is "Super Chad," lol. To be honest, you make a good point. During these crazy times, I'm exercising outside consistently and disciplining myself before I'm 21 next year, just to make sure I moved on from my adolescent days... I'm a _very_ late bloomer.
@Watchyourselvez4 жыл бұрын
@@glorykiller998 Talking like that and being just 20 means you're not a late bloomer. I'm 27 and let me tell you that most adults older than both of us never left high school. It's pathetic. Good luck bro
@adopodrinje14994 жыл бұрын
its faaaar from funny, its agonizing to live like that.
@cdawg2724 жыл бұрын
I would argue that most people are just pussies nowadays. They find a way to care about something said by someone they don't even know. in today's society that probably makes me a bully for saying that.
@popnpaddle4 жыл бұрын
This dude is like the foster dad for all of us
@misurakaluarachchi29564 жыл бұрын
Matt Lifko him and Jordan Peterson
@ChanceCottle4 жыл бұрын
💯, Jocko and Peterson as foster dads and Brian Tracy as foster grandpa.
@Nuno374 жыл бұрын
No he is not a dude, you are a dude. He is a man, strong muscular man
@alexzanderroberts9954 жыл бұрын
@@Nuno37 hi drax
@gracefool4 жыл бұрын
The sad thing is that 1. so many of us need a foster dad 2. we find them on the Internet Here's to changing that and being good fathers to the next generation.
@luukweeko4 жыл бұрын
When I got bullied and got home with a bruised face, my dad asked me how the other guy looked. After telling him what went on and admitting that I was too scared to fight he scolded me and tought me some tough life lessons on the spot, no coddling and brutal honnesty. After hearing my dad out and learning from his wisdom, he gave me an assignment, the next bully who tried to fight me or bully me in any way, punch them immedietly, hit or mis, just punch, if a fight broke out and you lose, take the loss and every time you see your bully, wether in the lockerroom, bathroom or in the hallway, punch him unprovoked, make them warry and scared, jump on him. He told me, you might be weaker, but that bully will regret crossing you cause no one likes to be punched in the face. So i did what my dad told me, for 2 weeks i was the shadow of my bullies, every oppurtunity that they where alone i would punch them straight on the face, every mean look that they gave me i punched, if i would feel that they tried to bully me, i would punch them. I grew confident, i was not scared of confrontations anymore, i was never strong to begin with, but they did not dare to bully me again,
@AbdulSamad-dz4vw2 жыл бұрын
Thanks man for sharing, I wish I was taught this lesson too early on in my life :')
@VicksWezaleff2 жыл бұрын
Your lucky to have such an awesome dad. All my dad's advice consisted of ignore the bully or snitch to teacher ;_;
@MA-to4nh2 жыл бұрын
lol wait u just punched them when they gave u a mean look? ahahahaha
@roisin33 Жыл бұрын
I just had fantasy flashbacks to me stalking out my school bullies in the p.e hall, ahhh if only
@abdiloly7322 Жыл бұрын
Fear or no fear if someone said something that didn't sit well with me be sure I'll come back for you anytime or anyday cause that words will eat away at me untill I settle it with you....don't know why I'm wired that way
@hekkenschutz4 жыл бұрын
Well, bullies are everywhere Neighbors, coworkers, in traffic, in the store, managers, bosses, churches, families and more It's a life skill to handle Bullies
@Ojthemighty4 жыл бұрын
Im 28 and im still learning. Trouble is im too polite. Thats quickly changing tho
@sunnibird4 жыл бұрын
Not if they're bigger, if there are more of them, they know how to fight and you don't, they're relentless, they're more aggressive etc...
@Dustomatic4 жыл бұрын
Jon H I agree. Bullies will never disappear. The only thing you can do is work on your ability to handle them. But that doesn’t mean we should dismiss the struggles of those being bullied.
@ciro99514 жыл бұрын
@@sunnibird well then you gotta get stronger, teach yourself how to fight, etc. Can't face them with a loser mentality bro
@FiremarshalM14 жыл бұрын
Ojthemighty They mistake our kindness for weakness. They have noooo idea.
@qdllc4 жыл бұрын
Sadly, adult life mimics high school much more than it should.
@therealjesus13174 жыл бұрын
A wise man once said “Life is just one big high school.”
@mat70834 жыл бұрын
Jesus
@montydurand4674 жыл бұрын
"Highschool never ends" -Bowling for soup
@user-pv9pv4xf9c4 жыл бұрын
Really? I found that college was way different. I've never been physically harmed or had my books smacked into the ground in college. In fact by then I probably would have followed someone to their car with a rock or pulled out a knife or something lol. You'll still have some "bullies" at work, but often they're just miserable people who are venting. I mean, if someone is physically abusing you on a day to day basis then something needs to change in your life.
@bettywhite26944 жыл бұрын
@@user-pv9pv4xf9c just wait until you start working. Most jobs are worse than high school for verbal abuse
@tired2sleep4 жыл бұрын
I'm usually a quiet guy and actually get flattered when people try to pick on me or bring me down because I see it as a sign of me encroaching on their insecurities. And when I respond with smile and humility it feels really good.
@ItsRaitisLV4 жыл бұрын
Guys test other guys when they see weakness in them. This is nature's way of eradicating weakness in males.
@frostbite49544 жыл бұрын
@@ItsRaitisLV Nature must learn diversity. People ain't the same.
@frostbite49544 жыл бұрын
When you have nothing to say,say nothing. I think that is a underestimated quality. And your outgoing and expressive on your own terms,not because it is expected. Nope,but because you want it. Like a lot of introverts do. We think more than we talk,others talk more than they think. Or at least,that is what I feel a lot.
@ItsRaitisLV4 жыл бұрын
I'm an introvert myself, introverts are afraid to talk because they are afraid of saying something meaningless or stupid. Deep down they want to connect with people but they expect others to initiate the contact. I'm generalising a lot here, but you get the point. I could rationalise my introvert tendencies by saying that I'm only open to the people I trust, but I'm not going to do it. The harsh truth is introversion is a result of some kind of childhood trauma or experience.
@MrWewill114 жыл бұрын
Ray Carden why did i know this but never knew this just blew my mind
@alisonlmt40294 жыл бұрын
Throughout high school, I thought for sure I’d outgrow bullies. Painful lesson to keep learning - You never do. If you’re different/have a disability in any way, you’re a target no matter what ecosystems you might be in...
@dm19722 жыл бұрын
most people are different. Im sure 99% of the people who bullied you have something wrong with themselves physically or mentally.
@VicksWezaleff2 жыл бұрын
Many friend groups in high school I ended up being the whipping boy. To this day I keep to myself at work and other events. Can't even be around family gatherings.
@iwilson6651 Жыл бұрын
Or any sort of perceived weakness, I’ve noticed this more with female coworkers and bosses then their male counterparts :-/
@abdiloly7322 Жыл бұрын
Bullies are cowards that tries to instill fear into someone verbally or physically guess what why are they always in groups?why don't they bully someone alone?huh.....one was lucky he tried to belittle me in front if his friend whereas was so far from home, his lucky I hadn't killed him cause of that,his days were numbered and i addressed him calmly what he was doing wasn't cool and lucky enough he said he didn't mean it.that saved his life I assure you
@bishop205111 ай бұрын
then get a man.
@RenzoIsHereYT4 жыл бұрын
Imagine this is the dad of the kid you're bullying lmfao
@joshuasmith63464 жыл бұрын
I'll just get my dad to beat his ass whenever he shows back up in my life. It sure takes a long time to go to the store and get a pack of cigarettes
@jrusstrevenant10924 жыл бұрын
That's terrifying.
@Anarchy-Is-Liberty4 жыл бұрын
You could only hope the guy would be as cool and as level headed as this dude!!!!
@Aydee20204 жыл бұрын
Jocko wouldn't let his child be bullied in the first place
@Anarchy-Is-Liberty4 жыл бұрын
@@Aydee2020 - He may not have a choice! And, so glad you can speak for him.
@andrewgoldin69053 жыл бұрын
How you respond to disrespect is one of the ultimate signs of character. It takes a big person to not want to hurt the other person back. However most will take disrespect to heart and desperately wants to hurt the other person back. You have to be comfortable with who you are, and understand the other person is coming from a place of insecurity. Being comfortable with who you are takes work though.
@CraZy2919 ай бұрын
very well put
@jonasbaine35382 ай бұрын
Thank you. I was disrespected recently and wanted revenge but didn't want to risk spending days in jail and legal fees. Your comment really helps me make peace with how I de-escalated the situation and didn't engage in violence despite my residual anger now. I have however acquired several personal defense options now...
@FruityHachi2 ай бұрын
you will hurt the other person back no matter what you do, even when you just smile they will get mad that they didn't get the reaction they wanted they will not take your smile as "oh what a good guy/gal, my apologies" but instead they will think "how DARE he/she to make ME look bad"
@snail27344 жыл бұрын
I was severely bullied in h.s. And didn’t have any kind of support. If I were to give advice to kids about it - the one thing that would of helped is if I’d been told focus on future goals bc like Jocko says h.s. Is not your life -- but when your attacked every day as a teen it’s hard to see that.
@elijahrector21684 жыл бұрын
I was bullied a lot as well I feel your pain
@mmmmmm65434 жыл бұрын
I’m very sorry to hear that. I believe at that age things are too overwhelming to be receptive to good advice. To be honest I believe the best thing is to train, and train hard. Confidence will come via experience, and a lot could change from year to year.
@1pcfred4 жыл бұрын
Yeah kids are dumb. Like John Wayne said, Life is hard; it's harder when you're dumb.
@snail27344 жыл бұрын
MMM MMM thank you
@williswayne18762 жыл бұрын
Yeah same here, high school days wasn’t my time and I don’t even like looking back at it
@beckonerseven95174 жыл бұрын
Bullying will exist as long as Cluster B personalities do. Malignant narcissism is not a problem people grow out of, it's a problem that unfortunately can't be permanently solved without violently eradicating the perpetrators. A wolf won't spare sheep, that's why you need a pack of sheep dogs
@RichardMiller-tq6ut4 жыл бұрын
...or quit being a sheep
@adamshockley15624 жыл бұрын
I'd put a domesticated wolf against a sheep dog any day
@beckonerseven95174 жыл бұрын
Bottom line is when you're dealing with a rampant predator, asking it to stop and playing nice doesn't work. You have to be willing to use force. Don't take the animal analogy so far that you romanticize wolves and miss the point. Unless you're a textbook narcissist obviously trying to feel special
@friedlemons52014 жыл бұрын
@@RichardMiller-tq6ut easy for a wolf to say...
@btjunkieforever4 жыл бұрын
@@RichardMiller-tq6ut and what about being a sheep? sheeps are part of this world too. maybe we should drive them extinct just because you! can't come up with anything better to solve the issue. Just another point of view.
@colesteeleA4 жыл бұрын
Jocko is a genuinely great guy, at helping people put things in perspective.
@sunnibird4 жыл бұрын
I don't think bullying has been an issue for him for a very very long time.
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
its promoted from the dumbass culture here and sometimes they meet guys like me or way worse. good riddance if they get killed.
@agame-jv6zv4 жыл бұрын
crazymacedonianboi 1903 what
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
huh? where? 😂😜exactly how it’s spelled bub.
@teller1213 жыл бұрын
@SUB ZER0 ?
@Pdraper844 жыл бұрын
Jocko: Nobody cares Joe Rogan: Have you tried sauna? Brendan Schaub: Sauna is amazing.
@thataintnomoonsucka4 жыл бұрын
Dude, the Brendan part is so spot on! Thank you.
@Kelso5404 жыл бұрын
Joe Rogan: Yeah but sauna with weed better. Ever tried DMT?
@jmiogo4 жыл бұрын
I enjoyed this
@mississippisnowplow4 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂😂😂
@TalkingIsh1004 жыл бұрын
Highschool isn't life but bullies don't just magically go away. I've had several jobs working with ppl with that bully mentality. The best thing to do when bullied is use that as motivation to put yourself in position to hurt a bully if they get physical. Start training in something. Boxing, wrestling, bjj, muay thai, judo or "mma" which is a mixture of fighting styles. Even if u never have to defend yourself it will at least boost confidence to the point that you'll no longer be so concerned with bullies. If they come you're better equipped to deal with them.
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
exactly. and use ruthlessness if ur outnumbered. letting them off just perpetuates the problem.
@TalkingIsh1004 жыл бұрын
@Jameson W ...Right. I don't know why but a lot of ppl push the idea that if u just ignore bullies they'll go away which is why they never go away.
@TalkingIsh1004 жыл бұрын
@@crazymacedonianboi ...Exactly. They want their victims to continue to let them off to continue to portray themselves as being so tough.
@beedebawng25564 жыл бұрын
Most people in position to be bullied (usually the most disposable employees) don't have the luxury of training in a sport. They usually have to work several jobs and don't have time for that.
@TalkingIsh1004 жыл бұрын
@@beedebawng2556 ...True in a lot of cases.
@ThisRemindsMeOfaJoke4 жыл бұрын
jealousy is the main reason...in both elementary and high school i wasn't bullied but all my classmates mostly the fellas they loved to team up against me and back then i didn't give it any thought cause when you're a kid you're like a doggy you just live in the moment and easily forget about shit but now as a adult looking back i see it was pure jealousy i was always the tallest and most handsome dude in class and the fellas hated me for it..... when someone picks on you is because there's something about you that triggers their insecurities
@you8just4 жыл бұрын
When someone is picking on you or tries to intimidate you, they are definitely insecure, jealous haters, you got nothing against them but they just want to get attention and be part of your life. They try to make you angry, that's how they control you, forgive them they cannot help it, it's an ego defense mechanism. Once you have forgiven them they cannot effect you anymore.
@nealtheall72364 жыл бұрын
@islanti as a kid, throwing the first punch isn't the worst idea. Just make you you can finish what you start. Word gets around you don't put up with bullies and it tends to work that way.
@PsychicsRfake4564 жыл бұрын
I am going to have to disagree with you. "forgive them they cannot help it" ... yes they can its called self control. my advice to anybody getting bullied is to stand up for yourself, depending on the situation it might be to fight back or report them to a higher power. if you do nothing the bulling will go on
@you8just4 жыл бұрын
You cannot control anger it controls you, they push your buttons to get a reaction, if you for example hit them its negative but still attention, so you loose and they get what they want. From what I learned with my bullies is that every time I reacted with anger or emotion, it did not help my situation at all. When I forgave him, he could not make me angry anymore, I could respond in a calm manner and the game was over. Than he became angry it was really funny.
@PsychicsRfake4564 жыл бұрын
@@you8just yes you can control anger, it only controls you if you let it. if you stand up for yourself you send a message that you are a person not to be messed with. I was bullied at a job and I "turned the other cheek" and the bulling continued for years. looking back I should have reported the bully to HR right from the get-go
@you8just4 жыл бұрын
@@PsychicsRfake456 I didn't say don't stand up or speak up for yourself, just don't hate, I also thought I could control my anger once. Check out Jesse lee Peterson's take on anger and forgiveness it might change your mind. kzbin.info/www/bejne/g2qadaWvlLapbKs
@Lemurai4 жыл бұрын
My dad just told me to not say anything and start swinging if a bully tries to jump on you. Never had any problems since then.
@tonyjones15604 жыл бұрын
My dad taught me to box so I could swing with "education," LOL. Add in the willingness to bust chairs over peoples' heads and...well, none of my bullies ever came back for a return match, even on the many occasions where I got my ass kicked. The day came where the bullies were like, "Dude, it's not worth it. Yeah, he's a huge nerd but he's also homicidal." I was stabbing dudes with pencils 40 years before John Wick was a twinkle in a screenwriter's imagination (inspired by two old-school pro wrestlers, The Sheik and Abdullah the Butcher)...
@1pcfred4 жыл бұрын
If you have to resort to violence then you've lost the fight.
@alexkmoz4 жыл бұрын
@@1pcfred I think Tony's acting tough because he's behind a keyboard. Either that or he's writing from a prison cell.
@matiastuominen14474 жыл бұрын
Tony Jones thats the key, even if u lose but u fight back, they most likely dont think its worthy of all the trouble
@nofthet55484 жыл бұрын
@@1pcfred so when the guy batters you and you are in ICU for a week,...you can feel proud that you never lost that fight... .....nope,..sorry,...nope.
@decreed65054 жыл бұрын
Great advice. I think the majority of us have dealt with bullying, and unfortunately when I was a kid, my parents told me to always ignore it and they'd stop. Literally the WORST advice. For a while, my combat towards that was to just be an asshole back, stand my ground, and use that adrenaline filled rage to show that I'm not losing no matter what. The problem with this mentality is that it can not only lead to severe negative things, but it also keeps you from growing as much as you could. For the longest time I was in a pretty good space mentally, until around 25 I realized that I was getting bullied again, this time by family and coworkers! Why? Because I didn't give a shit, and thought I could ignore it. Turns out years later, I did give a shit, and if I were to resort back to my high school mentality of filling myself with rage and "I'm not losing no matter what" I'd end up in prison. Years after, I literally had no idea how to make things "right" so that I could have a peace of mind. But then I stopped feeling sorry for myself, realized I put myself in that situation, and I chose not to respond in the way I would've liked to. So how did I feel better? Not by bashing a hammer into their skull, but by growing. Improve yourself, and use that anger/rage in a positive outlet, I promise you'll feel so much better and end up living a better life in the process. Bullying will never stop, people just find more clever ways to mask it as they get older. One last thing I'd say to remember is that people judge not by what's said to you, but how you react to it.
@ddl4374 Жыл бұрын
This is really heroic profound feedback. Spectacular
@49ersalltheway10 ай бұрын
Great advice/story, thank you
@jackiesmith28014 жыл бұрын
My next door neighbor is a 42 year-old bully. Sometimes bullies never grow up. I have tried to get L.E. to talk to him about his trespassing and damage to my property, but the police will do nothing. This only emboldens the bully. The only thing the bully understands is their victim putting them at risk of encountering physical pain. I have set up a target shooting area next to the property line. We'll see how this Summer goes...
@maxamillion21404 жыл бұрын
Maybe a no trespassing sign warning that those who trespass could possibly be shot would help as well
@jackiesmith28014 жыл бұрын
@@maxamillion2140 That's coming next. I'll probably get arrested for posting it,
@redpillsatori30204 жыл бұрын
@@jackiesmith2801 ..if you're a woman, then probably not.
@sacredheart90534 жыл бұрын
Sue him.
@diplomatdiplomat28004 жыл бұрын
Sue him and the court will do something about it. Good luck
@keithsimonh4 жыл бұрын
>high school isn't life Can we spread this one around more? I think a few people might've missed the memo.
@blackbeard00744 жыл бұрын
School isnt anything honestly lol
@blackbeard00744 жыл бұрын
@Greed Fatigue is that right
@blackbeard00744 жыл бұрын
@islanti 😂
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
Greed Fatigue- it never worked with me because I get nuts and I can be cold and calculating if I’m outnumbered.
@thedavidprobbins4 жыл бұрын
I was bullied at least once a week in school for 12 years. I almost killed myself over it. When I got out of high school, I vowed that I would never be bullied again. Period. I went and got training. I learned how to fight and handle myself physically, and I learn how to handle people. It’s the one wound in my life that has never totally healed over. I have a psychology practice now and my work is helping people. That being said, sometimes when that bully zeros in on you and will not leave you alone, your only recourse is to throw them a beating so bad that they regret having bullied you in the first place. Even if you get hurt in the process.
@abdiloly7322 Жыл бұрын
True some people respond well to violence...
@FalseProphetFallacy Жыл бұрын
@@abdiloly7322 *Most people respond well to violence
@abdiloly7322 Жыл бұрын
@@FalseProphetFallacy exactly they push you so far untill you have to retaliate back
@LadyofSharlot Жыл бұрын
Sorry to hear you experienced that.Pleased to hear you learnt skills .Well done on having your psychology practise,you have empathy .Great achievement.
@polishherowitoldpilecki5521 Жыл бұрын
Mind giving me some advice. In a professionals setting how to avoid getting picked on.
@LOVEisTHEultimateLAW4 жыл бұрын
each time i got bullied in school it never stop until i became violent toward them. only thing that worked, no parent calling the school, director talking to them, me talking to the teacher about it NOTHING WORKED EXCEPT VIOLENCE
@monopolybillionaire5027Ай бұрын
I just made my coworker crap his pants, big guy didn't even want to fight me in the end funny im a scrawny guy.
@Jean_Jacques148Ай бұрын
@@monopolybillionaire5027that’s because even lots of big dudes don’t want to fight, because you don’t know if a scrawny dude can hit, all it takes is one accurate well time punch to take your wind. Some big dudes rely on being big, and are all talk.
@sirraymondluxuryyacht81313 жыл бұрын
A few things that always stopped it for me was 1) to fight back..even if you know you will lose. Then the bully has to fight EVERY time they pick on you. (although, i hated fighting and it's not always convenient) 2) I had some tough friends - Just told them that the guy is being a jerk to you - they usually warned him off with a few rough thumps - didn't take much..bullies are cowards, only picking the small/weak guy. You kinda feel a bit weak needing someone to step in, but it's a WHOLE lot better than being bullied LOL My brother was bullied as a kid - he joined the local boxing club and start winning tons of trophies...bullying stopped, but also his confidence increased. I saw a kid insult him one day, making fun of him...he just shrugged it off. Didn't care. I asked why he didn't punch him, and he said "I've nothing to prove to him. I prove what I need to in the ring" - He then also had LOTS of boxer friends, which meant they were there if ever he needed it
@Lord_Brocktree4 жыл бұрын
So good! I remember the night after I graduated high school. I slept, for the first time in high school, for over 10 hours. Only because the depression and anxiety I felt was finally gone. That's when I learned that life is bigger than me and the little struggles of this life are not worthy to be compared to the glories to come.
@classact95572 жыл бұрын
I was bullied from kindergarten, all the way to high school graduation. I changed schools three times to get away from it, and the bullying just followed me wherever I went. I was, and still am, a quiet guy. I did my level best to be a good person to those around me, and was rewarded with merciless name-calling, mocking, insults, and even public humiliation. It got to the point where going home was my favorite part of the school day. And every morning, I dreaded having to go back to school and deal with the same people in the same environment, with the same circumstances. It’s the reason that after 8 years, I haven’t gone to a single reunion. So when Jocko says “high school isn’t life” I take it a step further. I act like high school was NEVER a part of my life.
@dm19722 жыл бұрын
males dont fully mature until mid 20s. Dont let the opinions of teenagers who dont have fully formed brains ruin your life bud.
@dynestis28754 жыл бұрын
If you get bullied, you try the peaceful solution first by talking to them, and after that you're presented with a choice; you either accept being a victim, or you start fighting back. College is not life indeed, but suffering through serious bullying for several years (high school, college, whatever) is enough to destroy someone. You're not gonna walk through that saying to yourself "Oh this is not life". You're still going to have to deal with the situation.
@1pcfred4 жыл бұрын
You missed the point. You're going to run into that nonsense everywhere for the rest of your life.
@alexkmoz4 жыл бұрын
But remember "fighting" isn't always a physical confrontation. Bullying isn't always physical. It's mental, it's emotional, it's group-based, too. Meaning you have to fight smart. In some ways, that's why boys have an easier time with it, because it's in your face. Whereas with girls, it's subtle, and not out in the open. The way to expose bullies is to expose their treatment of you to the light, to people who won't tolerate it, AND who have the authority to make it stop. You can bitch to the boss, but if he doesn't care, it ain't gonna stop. You have to find someone who cares, or find a way to make your boss care. Or like Jocko said, remove yourself from that ecosystem. Success is the best revenge.
@1pcfred4 жыл бұрын
@@alexkmoz we do not always have the luxury of removing ourselves at a whim. Often we just have to accept adversity. Life is not always kind or fair. I'd like to deliver a more positive message but nothing is coming to me right now. How about hardships that you face today better prepare you for trials you will face in the future? It is a constant struggle after all.
@alexkmoz4 жыл бұрын
@@1pcfred That's the biggest cop-out ever. "Suck it up, buttercup, because it's good for you". No. DO NOT suck it up. If you can't leave on a whim, develop an exit-strategy. Like I said, expose the behaviour to as many people as possible, with evidence to back your claim. If you can't do that, start seeking employment elsewhere. If you can't do that, get to a point where your skills and qualifications are desirable. ALL 3 of these are options. NONE of them are "suck it up buttercup, because you're better and stronger for it". Sometimes you just quit on a whim, and be dammed to the consequences because, dignity and self-respect. Debt and credit-ratings are existential, meaningless threats and have no bearing on the meaning of your life.
@kebman4 жыл бұрын
@Dominus Providebit What if he wins?
@basedbuzzlight89002 жыл бұрын
As much as I hate to admit it, I was a bully in life. The reason why I was that way because I was also the one being bullied, being put down by friends and family alike. So I thought it was normal to put people down and in a way, it was my form of communication. Then when I grew older and I met people who were genuinely kind and went through a lot of shit that fucked me up mentally. The number one thing you can do is just stand up for yourself and to put your foot down. I remember I was making fun of someone, and suddenly he just stood up for himself and it threw me off. Even though I acted like It didn't matter to me but in reality I never made fun of him again. Honestly most "bullies" just come from bad homes and places. There's probably a very few percent of people who don't come from those and actually enjoy it, and those people are probably psychopaths or something. I stopped my former way of life, and I try not to put people down even if it means im the one being put down. Sometimes I feel like I deserve that much at least to atone for my sins.
@FruityHachi2 ай бұрын
so you *liked* being put down by friends and family? because that's a only reason you'd have thought it's normal and as your form of communication
@SentientBurrito4 жыл бұрын
Please do a series on workplace conflicts and how to manage them. There are a lot of way and types of conflicts in workplaces. I would love to hear his perspective on them.
@nealtheall72364 жыл бұрын
As evo said, get his books and read them. They show you how to deal with those kind of people. I've also heard him address that in his clips on here as well.
@1pcfred4 жыл бұрын
The obvious answer is to write a book and become a podcast personality. Then you can quit your suck ass job and live the good life.
@peterhz64 жыл бұрын
has he ever had an office job?
@itsrtvbaby4 жыл бұрын
It's funny. In high school, I was bullied less simply because there was life out side of high school. But when you're in the real world and realize High school never left most people, then you've got a problem 😣
@Carter_brandt4 жыл бұрын
High school girl: I am getting bullied Jocko: No one cares!
@Ojthemighty4 жыл бұрын
😂
@markusht4 жыл бұрын
Munin Fjolnir nigga u trollin?
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
the more I listened the more I realize he’s pushing “ ignore them” when that doesn’t help solve the problem. aren’t the school systems and teachers the adults? they let the little bitches walk all over them? hah what a weak country.
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
uh I’ve been doing it . where I’m from people have no mercy and Jui Jitsu won’t really work. they run deep and some carry knives and guns. like that bar my grandpa’s friend owned ...where I filmed the crackhead trying to rap? that upload. I had to be no lesss than a monster. with those “ niggas” with my Disney looks? I’m the most dangerous person besides some family at that bar. I know how to do it but sounds like ur a good dad tho. stay safe and healthy dude.
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
the hood ain’t the mats or dojo ...u gotta be ruthless and mean . or get robbed and punked everyday . what do u choose? gotta have an iron fist whether it’s moral or respect worthy to people or not.
@patodabomb4 жыл бұрын
I was a bully in school. It was definitely because of my up bringing. I used to act out of fear. I learnt quickly, It was bully or be bullied. I had no remorse for my actions, as at the time I was in full survival mode. When I left high school I was forced into laboring jobs and the bullying continued, but this time it was aimed at me from grown men and I couldn't bully back because I was only 17 and intimidated AF. That went on for years and years and drove me into depression and social anxiety. Until I eventually put the pieces together. It felt like I was recieving my karma. A lesson from life. A teaching to stop acting blindly to old habit patterns and to treat people with the dignity and respect that everyone deserves. I changed in myself then the people started to change around me. Now, I'm kind and loving to all and I almost always get that in return. I still stand my ground when necessary, but I'm very mindful in my actions. I try to take my time and respond instead of react. To anyone reading this be kind to everyone because were all fighting our own battles and you never know how your actions can effect others, be it negatively or positively. Put those good vibes out there :)
@mmommo-hx4dx2 жыл бұрын
bravo
@gesmish8278 Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much. You are extremely brave for bringing your story up.
@ddl4374 Жыл бұрын
Wow it's amazing the incredible wisdom I am encountering here. That's an incredibly powerful testimony
@discipleaj4 жыл бұрын
Random bully: "mY dAd CaN bEaT yOuR dAd Up" Lil'Jocko: *Laughs in flawless victory*
@ryanmcewen4153 жыл бұрын
@Johnny Mitchell chuck norris has nothing on Jocko
@liam.44544 жыл бұрын
I got bullied working on a building site, I was only an operative/labourer and i found it hard to stand up to people as they were higher up the good chain than me I learned plumbing at nights school and it put me above most of the bullies and they had to respect me then
@richardstewart54994 жыл бұрын
Bullies are driven by insecurities in who and how they are. Great stuff from Point-Man Jocko.
@that1electrician4 жыл бұрын
Freshman: I'm being bullied 😔 Jocko: No factor 🙃
@sierranexi4 жыл бұрын
April 2020: "High school is not life". 2 months later: adult mobs beat people in the streets for disagreeing.
@labibsaud80644 жыл бұрын
Isn't that what's happening at the Riots now ? Hell atleast in High school had teachers and Principals who would stop it if it went too far but it's a circus out here in 2020.
@GhostType964 жыл бұрын
Its sad, that immature, insecure adults will try to make you feel as low as them because they never grew up, probably bullied themselves or some other misfortune and need an excuse to justify their HATE for you and their hate in general. I used to make the mistake of letting bullies (which included people who used to be family and friends) bring me down to their level and I would lose my cool and make myself look bad, which is exactly what they want you to do to help their cause. They would admit to being jealous, and angry at me for some reasons and wanted me to feel the same way because I was living the life, had a good job, hobbies, traveling and was generally happy and it made them sad and envious so they needed to come up with falsehoods to convince themselves and me that I was at their level which I wasn't, still not, and never will be. They would find any kind of flaw, wrongdoing, or innocent mistake and turn it into some big deal to make me feel like shit, but once I got wind that it was them that had a problem with themselves, I turned away and let them be. As time went on I realized it had less to do with what I did wrong and more to do with what I started doing right. "BULLIES", no offense to the actual bull, are nothing but lower than shit cowards who aren't worth any time, effort, thought, or anything at all, so it's best to ignore them, but know as soon as they grow impatient with you being more mature than them and decide that they want to get physical, GET PHYSICAL and let them know they made a terrible mistake. I had an adult figure in my life as a kid who once told me that they can talk shit, and play all the mind games they want but as soon as they put their hands on you, you lay em in the shade by any means necessary, no matter the size or shape. I'm quite confident in my muay thai , boxing skills, knife combat, and aim to fear no man or woman. I'm too nice, strong and happy of a person to let the weak break me. The worst part is they are fully aware of how ignorant they are. If you're being bullied in any kind of way I say stand strong, keep peace within yourself, and never let another human pass judgment unto you nor make you feel bad for being alive because NOBODY IS PERFECT. May the force be with ya'll.
@codysnyder904 жыл бұрын
Thank you, sincerely! ❤🤙
@breaks30852 жыл бұрын
Just read your comment, I can relate so much, the truth is I'm getting bullied, not verbally or physically, but in a passive aggressive way, here's the thing, I'm a bodybuilder, an I'm genetically gifted, I put on muscle quickly an I'm built with a good shape, the personal trainers in my gym an the members of the gym ALL have a problem with me, simply cos they struggle what i excel in, they give me rude looks cut their eye at me an just give me a bad attitude. Clearly putting their insecurities on to me out of jealousy, it's got so bad that I had to train today an literally have my back turned away from everyone, I face the wall & look at the ground after the exercise.
@abdiloly7322 Жыл бұрын
@@breaks3085 Dude your dad didn't raise you to live in fear just cause your genetically gifted doesn't mean you have to walk on eggshells cause someone will talk I'll of you or envy you nah,just walk head held high and do your thing,if they had a problem with that's on them if you didn't insult or harm them.never let someone dictate how you live cause at the end life is yours to live which is so short by the way to live in fear or prejudice.
@Malcolm3114 жыл бұрын
I wish i had this intel in the 7th grade
@thedrcrow58414 жыл бұрын
@Jameson W The problem with just ignoring them is very many kids often don't have a life outside of high school, unless their nudged they often won't have the foresight to read between the line
@sanjayraju9884 жыл бұрын
I worried about bullying so much that I messed up my grades. Bullying can make you mess up your goals. Do not let them.
@storyteller27234 жыл бұрын
Dude, wtf, you wouldnt anyways. This is 50 years old man
@sgtrock28214 жыл бұрын
Yeah? When the bully busted your nose you wish you would have just said "so what it doesn't matter. Outside this ecosystem no one cares" SMFH LOLOLOL.
@storyteller27234 жыл бұрын
@@sgtrock2821lulz, yep, needed to get them dirty fists to work!
@lindatenuto63004 жыл бұрын
People always talk about bullies as if they're simple to defeat once you understand their insecurities. The sad truth is, bullies spend their entire lives in conflict and they know how to deal with it a lot better than most people. Thinking of them as insecure losers may help you feel better (and is usually true) but it won't help you actually defeat them in the real world.
@chrishickman4 жыл бұрын
This doesn't really address the question or accomplish the title of the video. You can't "step outside of the ecosystem" if that ecosystem is tied to your identity. A person in high school can't just "step outside of the ecosystem". In addition, the "high school isn't life" thing is a joke. Yeah, it gets less often, but WORSE to deal with after high school. In high school, you can easily punch someone in the face to end bullying real quick. Once you're in a white collar career, that option is gone unless you like unemployment and jail. This video was a great perspective and great advice for certain situations in life, but this doesn't match the title. The only way to deal with this issue is to address your personal confidence levels. That, and also punch bullies in the face when you can get away with it.
@demonwiper94344 жыл бұрын
I acc totally agree, like people always tell kids just to not pay attention like they don't remember when they were a scared/insecure kid getting bullied. Idk why ppl don't tell someone to learn bjj and Muay Thai, get as big a crowd as possible on the playground and beat the bullies ass, or find some way to fuck with the bully till they realize you're more trouble than they gain. This whole "rise above it" or "don't listen" which works when ur a big, confident, got other shit going on adult doesn't work when ur a kid and school and ur school mates are literally your entire life
@glorykiller9984 жыл бұрын
I suppose I can agree. Jocko addressed how to respond for the _long term,_ but I like what you said about addressing personal confidence levels, ie. how to respond during the _present moment._
@whojackson4 жыл бұрын
Prayer
@DAGOWOOD234 жыл бұрын
Was thinking the exact same things
@Toleich4 жыл бұрын
Who said you can't punch in a white collar job? You just don't punch physically.
@scottking75564 жыл бұрын
Love it! I have worked for many top companies and also many start ups. One thing about the big, top companies, I have observed so many people thinking they are great just because they work there, you know better than others that work somewhere else. What you are saying confirms my position, "no one who is outside of a givenx environment cares". I worked for the worlds leading manufacturer of surgical robotics. A great company! Great leadership! Almost everyone who worked there seemed to think they were the best or better than others simply because they worked there. I left. The lure of the money couldn't hold me. The sense of self importance couldn't hold me there. I stepped out of that "ecosytem" and outside I found that no one cares. I have never been happier than I am today and a big part of that happiness was realizing the importance of being true to myself and my values. I translate your message into this "don't let the beliefs of others define you".
@mmommo102 жыл бұрын
being bullied by a church home fellowship group. gonna stop going....the girls don't want me there. and the guys enjoy seeing them bully me.
@michaeldavidnvitales4 жыл бұрын
What Jordan Peterson was saying was, play the game in such a way as to win the set of all games. It’s not just about one hierarchy - although it’s important- it’s about winning the hierarchy of all hierarchies. Playing that game properly is more important. That’s what he was saying, which is the same point you are elaborating. But I am curious what he would say in response to bullying. He got his fair share online and on interviews, and man, he handled it like a pro.
@chikaka20123 жыл бұрын
I’m in favor of destroying all hierarchies. 😁
@Kriegter3 жыл бұрын
so you're saying-
@artscraftsantiquity21854 жыл бұрын
The part where Jocko describes how he reacted to his kids coming home with an emotional issue made me think of my own dad. My own Dad would have lectured me on how hard life is as an adult and that I have it easy so I should stop crying or he’d beat my ass. No wonder I have no motivation to be in social situations as an adult.
@PunkMartyr2 жыл бұрын
I had to realize my parents were a product of their terrible childhoods or I would never be able to let go of this type of stuff.
@hershellumiere4 жыл бұрын
Learn how to fight and fight back even when you're going to lose.
@x7Votorious84x4 жыл бұрын
People will cry wolf. There’s bullies who will bait that reaction.
@user-wx4nv8xr3d4 жыл бұрын
ignorance is still stronger
@suhae21754 жыл бұрын
@@user-wx4nv8xr3d Naw unfortunately not always
@ETAisNOW-wn8wx4 жыл бұрын
@@x7Votorious84x those are the worst. They mess with you til you react then they act like you are over reacting. It's so weak and disgusting.
@blaqueknight4 жыл бұрын
@@ETAisNOW-wn8wx I kill them with kindness, without being resentful, because I have more important things to think about. If possible, I just cut them out of my life.
@Dutch-d5x3 жыл бұрын
The hardest thing about ADHD for me was getting bullied for being ginger and not being able to remember what people said/did to make me feel like shit about myself. I'd tell my parents but they'd ask for specifics that I just couldn't remember... Soon I stopped confiding in them and then come the worst days of my life. Looking back though, I wouldn't trade it for the world. Whenever I feel suicidal now I just look back at those times and just the fact I made it through them keep me going in the dark of the night
@tatskamaster4 жыл бұрын
Girl: "How do I deal with bullying in high school?" Jocko: "NO ONE CARES! ECOSYSTEMS, JIU JITSU, PODCASTS, SEAL TEAMS, I MEAN I GET IT JORDAN PETERSON and my point is remember, no one cares.." Girl: "...."
@barefooterin28174 жыл бұрын
Perfect...lmao
@DrZaius_34 жыл бұрын
Jocko is the only person who can be compassionate, understanding, and terrifying all at the same time.
@jamesfirehummer32164 жыл бұрын
school's a prison, with prison behavior.
@1pcfred4 жыл бұрын
School is state operated day care. So the parents can go to work and be taxed. That's all it is and all it ever was. Which is a bit of a damn shame. They claim they're teaching kids stuff while they're in school but facts differ from that narrative.
@shanepatrick6414 жыл бұрын
@@1pcfred I totally agree with you and not to mention a training ground to get kids used to working when they are older. To be "Another brick in the wall".
@1pcfred4 жыл бұрын
@@shanepatrick641 there is an element of institutional training involved with public schools. Where children are taught to conform. At least that's how it was where I went to school.
@shanepatrick6414 жыл бұрын
@@1pcfred it's was the same to when I left school in 2013.
@kebabozaurus4 жыл бұрын
ayyy there is a sex pistols song about this idea.
@rjc72894 жыл бұрын
"High school is not life!" Well said Jocko. If I had that sage wisdom available to me 30-plus years ago, I probably could've saved myself a lot of aggravation and frustration.
@JamesIanGilliam3 жыл бұрын
Me: “What do I do if I’m being bullied?” Jocko: “some people suck and nobody cares”
@mattburnett41854 жыл бұрын
First learn to be comfortable within yourself and then try to move on to true confidence (NOT cockiness) Learn to back yourself and your opinion even if you are totally outnumbered.. When it comes to confidence lie that, you can forget bullies. All bullies are either mentally ill, or insecure losers who never have the balls to take on someone bigger and stronger.. Never display weakness, most important especially if it cuts to the bone. The more it hurts, the better the poker face. Women seem to vent but for men, you have to bottle it up until it simmers, boils, and explodes, but not in a self destructive meltdown, direct the anger all in one direction, like a cannon this is your fuel, your motivation to succeed Also remember bullies are not your friends, better off lonely than with a group of asshole losers
@carpathianken3 жыл бұрын
I bought a Howitzer canon to direct all my anger into like you suggested but all the surrounding villagers are starting to resent me lobbing 150mm shells all over the neighbourhood when I get pissed off....
@Margarro234 жыл бұрын
All good points Jocko. I was always a big kid growing up. I made friends with the small kids who were mouthy. The small, slight, small ones. They couldn't defend themselves physically, but they could verbally. So, I hung around them to learn language skills. I made friends with this small kid in the BSA. Chris Maxwell. Always picked on and miserable. So we paired up. Bigger kids stopped picking on him and we had the best conversations. The smarter and weaker kid prepared me for life, paradoxically. I never really cared about the bully. All I had to do was sit perched from on high and watch him get his comeuppance. The tyrant always loses. It's the same in the animal kingdom, especially among apes. Here are a few examples, Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Lenin, Ceausescu, and Julius Caesar to name a few.
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
I’m small and I hit like a big guy . I got the strength of one and the first upload juggling and toying with that 110 pound kettlebell sums me up . arm wrestle me 💰💰💰. btw I weighed it in the “two hands anyhow “ upload in my basement. I train barefoot down there because it makes my feet strong too. my bones and tendon have always been naturally strong.
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
later big guy!
@Margarro234 жыл бұрын
Later my dude.
@sunnibird4 жыл бұрын
So if you're being bullied in high remember that ecosystem doesn't matter? Except that for 4 years it does matter and you have to deal with it, possibly on daily basis, and telling yourself this "doesn't matter" is not going to cut it.This is not an effective coping mechanism. Verbal and/or physical abuse, destruction/vandalism of your property on a regular basis is traumatic and telling yourself this ecosystem doesn't matter as a method to deal with that is laughable.
@sunnibird4 жыл бұрын
@Captain Weeblez No fuckwit I don't. But I do realize that you're stuck there for 4 years and that bullies aren't going to leave you alone because you think they don't matter.
@George_Stat6 ай бұрын
Completely agree and so well put. The only thing I would add is: one of the reasons that you should not let these ecosystems control your life is that doing so could have actual serious consequences that everyone cares about. In an extreme example, the awful stories of children committing suicide because of bullies in high school. In these cases, ecosystems that no one cares about have extreme consequences that everyone in their right mind would think are terrible and affect countless lives. This is more reason to emphasize the point of not letting these “fake” ecosystems affect you in a real negative way. I’m glad Jocko spoke about this, I don’t think it’s talked about enough
@musicplaylistize4 жыл бұрын
This video throws me back to 2017, i worked as a lifeguard in a poor part of town, and there was this kid who was super smart, around 10 years old, he was also pretty much abandoned by his family, he bullied other kids in the park, even stole a bike one time, but he had smarts. I showed him how he absolutely didn't care about rules could get you in trouble within every small "ecosystems", in fact, you get kicked out if you get caught not following the rules... wether it be the pool, school, a job or even society if you get thrown in jail. For the rest of the summer I never caught him bullying other kids or breaking pool rules, and i'm a good watcher. He might have played me for a fool, but he seemed honest. I gave him a lesson and a bit of envouragement, and I like to think that i helped a little guy out in life.
@PunkMartyr2 жыл бұрын
I was a security guard and a 12 year old stole a cheap item. I had a similar conversation. I really hope it made a difference. I know in my life one line can change everything.
@lylerubins91594 жыл бұрын
Use truth and love/compassion with every action you make, and you will often become a truthfully great person. It's hard, but people honor truthful people, these are the people we see as idols. So, look forward to that future, where you are respected, and you can feel good knowing you are respected for the right reasons.
@regulardude79614 жыл бұрын
Great points Jocko. I actually realized this first when I was in my 20s. Ego is our biggest blinder and hindrance in life. When you realize that nobody cares, it is immensely liberating. Jordan Peterson's "lobster ideas" do have some truth, but JP thinks he knows more than he does, sees more than he sees, and he has a gigantic ego. Jocko is the real deal.
@ennius424 жыл бұрын
This is comment that gives a good perspective about bullying that I once read: Folks. This is rotten that this happens. But you can't just attack the bullying and expect it to stop. It's inherent in human nature. Bullying is a way for young males to achieve a social cohesion and weed out the weak. Not saying it's right, it's simply the nature of humanity. You can't coddle and shelter your children from the ugly aspects of the real world and expect them to be strong and succeed. You need to PREPARE them to learn to deal with bullying. Teach them to expect it so it doesn't take them by surprise, cause them high levels of emotional stress, and drive them to suicide. Toughen your kids by being honest about the uglier aspects of the human condition. Then they'll know how to deal with this kind of thing, rather than resorting to suicide as their only way out. Kids are going to do this, no matter how much you try to change it. That's never going to stop. It's been an important aspect of human societal conditioning for hundreds of thousands of years of our evolution.
@AquanautSt14 жыл бұрын
"HIgh School is not life " We need the Jocko T shirt
@Dustomatic4 жыл бұрын
AquanautSt1 I think most people who bought it works be wearing it as an insult to high schoolers.
@MichaelJames-lz7ni4 жыл бұрын
Perhaps - but "life" is formed in High School - it plants a seed within.
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
no it’s def not but it’s a place where certain people learn dangerous habits because they get away with it without being held accountable. so they’re children until the day they croak .
@Lil.Grandpa4 жыл бұрын
Bullying doesn’t necessarily stop, it only evolves, so I have to disagree with Jocko there. It can be found in your workplace or any social places you frequent. The idea is to learn to stand up for yourself even if it means learning later in life.
@kanta321004 жыл бұрын
Standing up for yourself means what? You need to avoid bullies in life, realize they're no good and treat them like crazy people. That means no personal talk, no display of emotions around them, just pure business if it has to be done. Less they know you less the damage they can do. If it gets physical get a weapon, chances are you are outnumbered because they attack in groups. Forget about being nice, after school it's life or death with bullies, you have to be ready to take theirs if they don't stop. It's way easier to avoid them after school and they know it so they will act nice at first.
@xtraceex3 жыл бұрын
I'm past the stage of being bullied. However, looking back, I find that a condescending smile that says: "I don't care what you think, you're nobody to me" is very effective in putting them down. The bullys' goal is to think that he won - by showing him that you don't care, he loses. Nice to know that there are real men left in this world, need more of you guys...!!!
@WJFK4804 жыл бұрын
The only way to handle bullies is to completely ignore them, they'll keep trying but if they always get a reaction it will be worse, give them the cold shoulder, act as if they don't exist like ghosts you can't see or hear. If your walking keep walking, if your reading, keep reading, keep doing what you are doing. Hell, where earplugs in the halls, then you really won't hear them.
@swirlingbutterfly30312 жыл бұрын
You know what i am doing this for almost one year now its hard man it feels like shit when ever you go out every single person stares at you in very humiliting way everyone around you gossips about you there are all rumour about you they rip down your characters this so tough to go through Mann and it feels shit mann it does feel terrible every one have a opinion about you which lies on the negative side offcourse this is very sad to go through but you have to because we can't do anything
This is not true. U need to communicate w them up front.
@FruityHachi2 ай бұрын
if you pretend you don't hear them they will just start bumping into you to get your attention
@giugiu34474 жыл бұрын
I was born in 1965, boy and I was bullied, at infant and junior school. When I went to the local Comprehensive School, UK. I started training with weights and did karate, I had to great male coaches, who were the closes I had to a FATHERS, figures. In the end I dealt with the bullies, I would step in and stop bullying of other children. Bullies made me strong, physically and mentally.. I mean this to all of them.. Thank You!!! You won't be a kid forever, the best way for revenge is becoming successful. I'm not successful or rich, I'm a normal every day guy. But those bullies now still give me respect. Just be strong, it isn't easy, but don't let those Wankers beat you, it's a temporary bed, like camping.
@obadiahscave4 жыл бұрын
I've learned to thrive from criticism and ridicule.. And I've grown into a monster.. That know one can demenish..
@elijahrector21684 жыл бұрын
No one* diminish*
@bramabull1114 жыл бұрын
Bullying was the reason my best friend joined the military. Now he looks like jocko and will not get bullied ever again. He was more disciplined than I gave him credit for al those years.
@AJ-if1tq4 жыл бұрын
Going to raise my kids the Jocko way
@hootinouts4 жыл бұрын
Jocko is about the most logical person I've listened to in a long time.
@Accu53Mation4 жыл бұрын
Thanks #Jocko . I've listened to this podcast, and talked to my daughter (Asperger's syndrome), about immaturity & how people act to those not a part of a clique. When she is picked-on, her three best friends stay quiet, acting invisible. And that's understandable. What keeps her ahead of the mean kids, is she is definitely smart. Sixth grade, and taking ninth grade science & math. Her dream: She wants to be in the U.S. Navy Submarine service. What girls love watching submarine movies & documentaries?
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
I like looking up vids on ships and submarines cause they’re interesting but forget me working in one. that’s really cool. tell her crazymacedonianboi sends his respects.
@chikaka20123 жыл бұрын
Your daughter will always have her own money. Those who picked on her will not & will be eating cat food when they’re old.
@ABB14-112 жыл бұрын
Impressive kid. Damn, you must be proud.
@spacecy4 жыл бұрын
I was getting picked on for most of my childhood, even later during my mid-20's. Now at 35 years of age i carry with me the the horrible memories and damage that has been done to me which scarred me for the rest of my life.
@Dr.Pepperdave3 жыл бұрын
Take a Martial Art.
@spacecy3 жыл бұрын
@@Dr.Pepperdave why?
@jeremy04404 жыл бұрын
Glad I was homeschooled for most of my life.
@michael435673 жыл бұрын
Thinking about homeschooling my kids. How did you do exams, get into college or make meaningful friends? I don't want my kid to be a loner like me
@jeremy04403 жыл бұрын
@@michael43567 I believe they were sent to my mom by the state, and yeah that’s the sucky part of it is the social aspect, I was homeschooled from forth to finish but when I turned 16 I got a part time job at the local theatre and after a few cringeworthy months I was socially accepted 😂😂
@pasta87938 ай бұрын
I'm always reminded of this phenomenon when I go to company work parties. I work in a somewhat large, competitive, and fast-paced advertising agency. I ended up here because it's a job I feel like I can do pretty well and it pays a decent amount. I do not love advertising at all. As a matter of fact, I hate it. I despise every aspect of advertising and the industry as a whole. I just work since it's a decent check that pays the bills. A lot of my collegues however, really do care about advertising and are super proud of the fact that they work for this company. They studied it in school, they talk about it in passing, they truly see this as some sort of "end game" or admirable path. No judgement from me, that's their own prerogative. But because of how much they care about this little "ecosystem" that they're in, they REALLY care about who the higher ups are, who the new clients are, etc. I sometimes succumb to this thinking as well, and find myself feeling like I should care about and admire those above me in the corporate ladder. But then a big company holiday party rolls around and I finally see these people in a social setting detached from work, and I always have a realization that these people are all just the old, boring, run of the mill, average people you see walking around at the grocery store. In a non-work setting, detached from their ecosystem, they just look like cringey old schmucks that nobody cares about. BUT within the little ecosystem that is our company and the advertising industry that we operate in, they're big shots, they're really cool, admired, and seen as very intelligent and important. I've always found this phenomenon very interesting and I try to detach myself from it, but it's very hard once you're engrossed in an ecosystem 9-5, 5 days a week. I find that the more I am aware of this though, I have less stress at work, I perform better, and I feel less stressed outside of work. Really nice to see someone put it so succinctly and acutely in this video and how it may pertain to bullying. Bullying is just one potential negative of being within an ecosystem. Some other negatives could be stress, like mentioned, or insecurity, or a feeling of inadequacy. I think the people who get too engrossed in their ecosystems and feel like their ecosystems are the most important, and therefore, they are the most important, are often the self-absorbe annoying people we all hate in real life. It's important to take a step back and realize that all of the things we do as humans is all pretty asinine and pointless.
@_vofy3 жыл бұрын
School bullying matters because you get scarred for life then everybody's happy while you're in a queue to the therapist and by the time you're fixed you're 42.
@AngeloPNZN Жыл бұрын
I was bullied a lot in primary and middle school. Also in the workplace in my first years I was and still am getting bullied almost on daily basis by egoistic manipulating co workers. It takes experience and to build a shield against these types of people.
@akalcov2 жыл бұрын
This talk really helped me deal with past trauma from bullying when I was at school in central london (UK) where there were loads of teenage gangs roaming around and preying on kids making their way home by public transport. One time I was followed into a shop and they tried to take money from me right there in broad daylight with people watching and no-one intervened to help because a lot of these kids carried knives. No-one told me how to understand and deal with it back then. At a later stage I did a basic course of Jeet kune do which helped with confidence but I reckon it's probably a false sense of it because to this day I've never been in a physical fight with anyone in my life. I almost want to pick a fight with someone to get it over and done with - fear of physical confrontation - will I be able to handle myself if my back was against the wall? Martial arts is all just theory and drills at the end of the day until it is used in a real life situation. Later still I moved with my wife to another country, Poland where finally I feel again much much safer. I think recent nightmares of bullying were triggered recently by one of the other dads at kindergarten making fun of my "posh" english accent which is what the gangs used to to. Recently I've been struggling with pent up rage towards this guy and have found myself trying to avoid him on the school run to pick up my kid, which is almost every day! and now I'm not sure how to handle it, such a funny situation! This turned into a form of journaling I guess. Not expecting advice, just want to be heard. If my kid comes home one day and says he's been bullied, I sure as hell am not going to dismiss it the way my parents did. I want to explain to him like this Jocko guy - memorise what he said word for word if I have to so I am ready for that moment when it comes and I know it will sadly.
@toddherrera5977 Жыл бұрын
Hey man, I know it's been a long time but how have you been? I also have yet to encounter physical confrontation besides me learning the theory and train boxing
@kcguardian4 жыл бұрын
Bullying is always going to be hard to deal with, but not having any support makes it harder. Strength and courage starts from within but is sustained by relationships. No support means strength and courage are harder and harder to come by because the only thing you have to sustain it is yourself. Building relationships that you value means that when others make fun of you for it, you care less because their opinions don't matter to you. Find people you want to be around for your own and their benefit, and don't be afraid of reinventing yourself again and again as you continue to grow.
@fkerpants4 жыл бұрын
Very good points about ecosystems. Makes me think about a woman I know who talks incessantly about her kids. Now, when it comes to bullies, how about a video where Jocko gives pointers on beating the shit out of them? Instead of strengthening kids, the whole anti-bullying initiative has become a tool for silencing (bullying) those who engage in "hate speech" or diverge from the narrative. Kids, and adults are going to have to learn how to fight their own battles and not rely on others to protect them. That kind of independence makes for a tough society and the United States could definitely use some toughening up.
@zippyz41703 жыл бұрын
I think next time someone is starting to tearing me down...I'm just gonna put my mouth guard in and say "You wanna go".
@_tellavision2 жыл бұрын
This is how I feel at this point.
@crimsonmonke4 жыл бұрын
Bullying, ecosystems, what's that? I haven't seen a person in weeks since quarantine. What day is it?
@TXP94 жыл бұрын
WHAT YEAR?!!!
@1simo935214 жыл бұрын
You're in an eco system of one...
@Anonymous-tk9re4 жыл бұрын
I’ve been practicing social distancing since way before it was trendy. This is child’s play.
@crimsonmonke4 жыл бұрын
@islanti You sound very gay right now.
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
fuckin Friday man ...ikr.
@mrtopramen4 жыл бұрын
I thought this with body building and weight lifting. That’s when I realized being healthy is the most important for most people. Many people chase numbers and end up ripping them selves apart like Ronnie Coleman, but they don’t get any trophies, awards, recognition, or money from it. It’s really like you said, most people don’t even care.
@williemartin98724 жыл бұрын
This couldn’t have come a better time. Thank you !
@Anarchy-Is-Liberty4 жыл бұрын
There are a lot of people who still live that lifestyle!! I went to my wifes class reunion a couple of years ago, and about 10 of those people were still stuck in high school mode, and this is 35 years after high school!! They ended up getting 80% of the people there back into that mode as well. When they came up to me and tried starting their BS, I simply stated: "there's a reason I carry a gun", and then walked away. Never got messed with again, and they all seemed to mysteriously calm down after that.
@vysheslavuzumati12694 жыл бұрын
More like Egosystem haha
@SamBsound4 жыл бұрын
I'm using this from now on
@shilohbegley24014 жыл бұрын
I thought the same thing! Its too true.
@oooweebaby44833 жыл бұрын
There is truth to picking, the target can often improve in some aspect and not blame others.
@Jman161194 жыл бұрын
Freshman Girl: "I'm getting bullied at school, how do I deal with this?" Jocko: "The environment that makes up most of your life, at this stage of your life... doesn't matter." And that's how to easily deal with somebody picking on you!
@sunnibird4 жыл бұрын
It's literally the worst advice on the subject I have ever heard.
@Jman161194 жыл бұрын
@@sunnibird could've followed up with "it won't be for long" or "find different ecosystems that can give you the confidence/ability to deal with the toxic ones" but it just got summed up as "your problems aren't important".
@theonlyone87104 жыл бұрын
Jman16119 His book actually has better advice, essentially to sum it up he says: Confront them, or do his personal choice of attack: Ignore and Outperform. Ignore it as best you can, work your ass off and let your success make the noise. When they’re hating, you’re working, and before they know it they haven’t moved and you’re above them.
@sunnibird4 жыл бұрын
IWG Productions The ‘ignore’ them part is laughable. When they’re harassing, beating, embarrassing their victims on a near daily basis. I’m sure it’s easy if you’re built like Jocko.
@pacibaco4 жыл бұрын
sunnibird exactly... the “ bully “ part should be self explanatory in that it does not stop . I was fit, well liked but I was relatively quiet so I got a lot of grief from upperclassmen and then later wannabe tough guys out on jobs sites in construction. The best solution is : if you’re under 18 smash them when nobody is around . Over 18 ? Smash them when nobody is around but leave no marks ( wrist locks , body shots etc ) then threaten to tear off an ear or break an eye socket . They will stop .
@dmoneyusa28514 жыл бұрын
Such a powerful man with amazing values.
@austinlay40854 жыл бұрын
He left out the best example of this: PRISON.
@bloodsweatandbeers96703 жыл бұрын
I trust this man 100% and dont remotely no him. Guys all love until its war. So much respect and his words are golden. Thanks dude your the mentor I require right now.
@MrLinkai4 жыл бұрын
Kids problems are usually not smaller than ours. Sometimes they are greater.
@magnustorque55284 жыл бұрын
This guy identified something that is not only a universal concept, but also something that most people don't recognize. These "micro" dynasties can absorb and destroy the people that allow themselves to be included in them. Identifying this is the most brilliant revelation that anyone can experience. "no one cares" ANother amazig nuance. If you can get a grip on this , it will be liberating.
@SuperBlaze1174 жыл бұрын
Hmm no wonder children don't listen to adults. "Who cares?" They do, and thats all that matters. Suffering is relative.
@Ojthemighty4 жыл бұрын
Exactly. Its like lifting heavy weights. Just cos one guy can lift it with ease dosnt mean everyone can.
@lifebydesign94354 жыл бұрын
@@Ojthemighty the secret to emotional resilience and stability is working on yourself. Learning and hobbies and exercise are the only things that make the world easy. We need to teach kids this because the world is always going to be imperfect.
@Manuel-kl8jc4 жыл бұрын
Suffering has nothing to do with it and I can prove that you agree with me.
@crazymacedonianboi4 жыл бұрын
right . how are they the good guys when they don’t care about teaching kids to be more civil. I’m civil but not if someone starts running their mouth because they can’t outsmart me on issues I understand.
@SuperBlaze1174 жыл бұрын
Ok children. My original comment was kinda lazy. The point I had in my mind was more about how I watched this video about him telling a story about how to handle people who pick on you. By the end of it he had offered nothing helpful to the girl who asked beyond "highschool isnt life". What a horrible thing to say to a young girl who is suffering. Yes being an adult is much harder, but we were prepared for the pain by enduring all of the "relative" pain along our road to adulthood. What upsets me is that adults become so jaded and out of touch with the very real pain of young people that they simply dismiss it as unimportant. For the children it is as real as our so described "real life pain". You cannot communicate wisdom to a child who hasn't earned its meaning. Instead you must filter that wisdom into helpful advice relative to their experience.
@lorenzocoy-galindo44194 жыл бұрын
Wish I had seen or heard this advice when I was in elementary/middle school. It would’ve spared me from a lot of pain now.
@unclejaypoker16794 жыл бұрын
You always bring life into the ultimate perspective...cheers to you my brother!
@mandst54664 жыл бұрын
Always fight a bully, no matter how many times you MIGHT loose!
@genesiskeglar63724 жыл бұрын
“Strip mall Karate (club)” sounds like a good vaporwave album name
@sd52414 жыл бұрын
Jocko reminds me of my DS. Tall, bulky, muscular but god damn gentle at the same time. He helped us and since he used to be football coach he knew how to bring us back up. The moral system is strong with Jocko.
@kaltonian4 жыл бұрын
Hi Right then Jocko I have to say something, after listening to you and watching you on your podcasts since the 1st podcast is i have to say, now please don't take offence to this which I don't think you will but for an army nut You are one clever man m8 & your advice and understanding of life decimates nearly all life coaches and professors of life studies and i mean that, you come out with some real stuff that carries good wait so i would like to say Thank you Jocko & Echo, thank you
@flossygallaway65654 жыл бұрын
This is why i have become a recluse i don't care about gossip religion anymore people just seem to suck now . No humanity no empathy no thought for others.
@mouthbreather2804 жыл бұрын
Love the Ecosystem perspective. So many things fall into some ecosystem. Another awesome Jocko speech/interview/podcast 👍